I'm just a writer. And stuff. I'll write a more interesting bio if people ask c: I do art as well and I like it when people visit my deviantART for just this purpose.
After many years of hardship and being down on her luck, Berry Punch is finally leading a normal and healthy life, working hard each day to make sure things stay positive for her with the help of her best friend, Golden Harvest. A story that follows Berry as she lives her life making the best of herself, meeting new Ponies and learning new things.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Very well done. Your writing style is clean and varied. I'll know more about your characterization after the next few chapters. Don't be afraid to mix up those words you use to identify ponies. "pony girl" can also be "The lavender maned, mulberry earth pony." Ponies can be easily recognized by their color and subspecies, so using those terms when describing them can be very helpful, especially when there are multiple speakers.
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I'm used to sticking to a rather small set of verbs and descriptions, but this story is an experiment in trying to expand my descriptive vocabulary, to say the very least. And sometimes too many words at once just isn't necessary, too! I'll find the right balance soon enough, I think. Thanks~
That's been something I've been consciously working on, yes
I'm really liking this story so far.
You have done well with the characters, and I want to see more of this story.
Looking forward tow the next segment.