Shoo Be Doom
SHOO BE DOOM
Twilight found herself momentarily forgotten as the ponies around her gaped at the pool, now churning and overflowing. Water spilled over the pool’s rim creating a rapidly widening puddle on the temple floor.
“Looks like we’ve sprung a leak. Everypony out,” said Gumdrop Giggles. Her words seemed to rouse the others and kick started a stampede of ponies galloping for the tunnel, dragging any artifacts they could lay their hooves on along with them.
Another tentacle, scaly, dexterous and a sickly pale green, slithered out of the pool and reached out probing around the edge, sending ripples through the flowing water on the floor. Not finding anything, the tentacle retreated back into the pool and the creature’s head broke the surface a moment later.
Despite the name, seaponies bore only a passing resemblance to an actual pony. Their faces was dominated by two bulging, milky white eyes that stared blankly out. In place of a mane was a fin, stretchy membrane twitching as sea water dripped off of it. But the worst feature was the thing’s maw, a gaping hole in its clammy flesh filled with row after row of jagged teeth. Twilight could even make out a few scraps of the diving suit the mare in the pool had been wearing lodged between them.
An earth pony stallion who was either much braver or much stupider than the rest of the crew strode towards the pool, the hilt of a cutlass wrapped around his hoof. Sensing movement the monstrous fish creature turned in his direction and hissed, an awful raspy sound. Quick as a whip, the seapony lashed out with one of its tentacles, but the stallion was faster with the blade. The swinging tentacle struck the edge of the cutlass, which bit deeply into it while the creature let out a feral scream of pain. The pony yanked out the now-bloodied sword and stepped up to the pools edge. He raised the sword.
“This is for Deep Blue, you bastard,” he said. He drove his sword straight into the creature’s open mouth. It screamed as the the sword cut deep into the back of its throat and out through the back of its head. Before the pony could pull his hoof away, the mouth clamped shut around his foreleg, trapping him. The creature writhed in pain, its death throes whipping the pony around like a rag doll. The dark shapes of more seaponies appeared below the surface and more tentacles emerged from the water, wrapping around the unfortunate pony and yanking him back and forth over the pool.
“Anyway Twilight, as I was saying... Twilight?” Gumdrop Giggles stomped her hoof down on the stone floor by the mouth of the tunnel, pulling Twilight’s attention away from the horrifying scene playing out in front of her. “Honestly, look at other ponies when they’re talking to you. There’s no reason to be so rude about this. Now give me the dagger and you can come through the tunnel after us. Otherwise I’ll break your legs right here and leave you for those things, and we’ll send a couple divers down for the dagger in a few days.”
Twilight’s mind raced as she looked down at the dagger sitting in the rising water. The prospect of becoming seapony food was too terrifying for her to contemplate. Her horn flickered and she slipped a tiny enchantment of her own onto the dagger. “Fine. You win. I’ll trade you the dagger for the detonator. Then you’ve got sixty seconds to get moving before I’m coming up the tunnel after you.”
Gumdrop grinned at her. “I knew you could be reasonable. Hey, you!” She gestured to a green earth pony mare who was one of the last henchponies heading into the tunnel. The pony came over to her wordlessly. “Bring this over to her, nice and slow. Twilight, you levitate the dagger over to me and we’ll swap them at the same time. If she tries anything funny, bite down on it,” she said. The earth pony took the offered device in her mouth and began to walk towards Twilight slowly. In return Twilight floated the dagger towards the pirate captain as quickly as she dared.
Gumdrops took the dagger and began to trot down the tunnel as the mare reached Twilight. She spat out what she’d been holding in her mouth.
It was just a hunk of grey rock.
“Sorry Twilight! Looks like I lied,” Gumdrops voice echoed forth from inside the tunnel. The room shook as a series of small explosions went off all over the wall around the tunnel. Rocks tumbled down, burying the entrance to the tunnel under several tons of rubble.
The green mare ran over to where the tunnel had been and started to dig through the rocks. “Wait! Captain, I’m still in here! Come back!” she begged.
With the damage to the base of the temple’s structure, Twilight could feel the ambient enchantment keeping the water out begin to weaken and shift. Sure enough the water from the pool was rushing outwards in a small geyser. The water was already up to her knees, and in under a minute it would be deep enough for those things to swim out of the pool. She doubted she’d be able to clear the tunnel entrance before then.
If I survive this, I swear to Celestia the first thing I’m doing is developing a spell that turns falling rocks into cotton candy, she thought to herself. She pulled her thoughts together and took a few deep breaths. She’d manage to recover somewhat from her fall and being knocked around, though she still felt like she might have twisted an ankle when she’d landed. Looking back up at the balcony above her. She focused her mind and teleported, landing on the floor above.
The mare below had turned around when she’d heard the telltale ‘pop’ of her teleport. When she realized she was now alone and nearly flank deep in a pool of water that was about to be invaded by seaponies, she started to sob. “Twilight, please don’t leave me here. Please help me. I’m sorry, please don’t let them get me. Please.” She pulled herself up onto the pedestal the giant statue of the sea serpent stood upon as dark shapes pulled themselves out of the pool and began to explore the murky sea water that covered the floor.
Twilight spared a glance past the railing overlooking the scene below. The water wouldn’t stop rising, not until it flooded the whole temple. It was vital that she get out as quickly as possible, and tell somepony what had happened. She didn’t have the time or the energy to waste trying to save a pony that, up until a minute ago, had been part of the gang that was trying to kill her. She’d brought this on herself, really. Twilight didn’t have any reason to risk her own neck trying to save her after that. She turned and stared down the hallway. She could see the doorway to the entrance that she’d entered the temple through. All she had to do was trot away.
“...I don’t want to die like this.”
Damn it.
Twilight looked down over the railing again. The water was lapping over the edge of the pedestal. Once the seaponies realized there was food there, they’d be on her in seconds. Twilight scrunched up her eyes and focused herself on the statue itself. Her magic wrapped around it and pulled. The metal groaned, but the statue didn’t budge. She pulled harder. Just when she thought she wasn’t going to be able to move it, the statue began to shift. First it moved slowly, but then began to fall faster as she pulled it further off base. She released it, and for a moment it teetered at the edge of balance before it toppled over, the top burst through the railing of the balcony she was on. The statue’s face sank into the floor, forming an awkward ramp from the pedestal to the second floor.
“Climb,” said Twilight as she panted for breath. The mare didn’t need to be told twice. She shimmied up the back of the statue and took Twilight’s proffered hoof, using it to pull herself up onto the balcony. The two of them collapsed onto the floor. The mare stood up and brushed herself off as Twilight took a closer look at her. She had a lime green coat with some sort of coin or dubloon for a cutie mark, and a golden blonde mane.
“Thanks, Twilight,” she said.
“You’re welcome, uh, what did you say your name was? I can’t just call you ‘hey you,’” said Twilight.
“Right, I guess we were never exactly formally introduced, were we? I’m Ample Booty,” she said, “and don’t bother with whatever you were about to say. I’ve already heard all the jokes.”
“OK then, Ample, so you’re some kind of pirate or something, and Gumdrop Giggles is your captain? Do I have that straight?” asked Twilight.
“Hey, when you grow up poor and your name is ‘Ample Booty’ you’ve basically got two possible careers, and trust me when I tell you that ‘pirate’ is better than the other one. But maybe we can talk about this later?” said Ample.
Twilight rose to her hooves again and looked down at the rising water below. The floor was already under several feet of water and if anything it was rising faster than before. Twilight thought for a moment, then lowered her horn towards the surface. A stream of magic blasted out and spread over the water. Ice crystals began to form as Twilight’s spell pulled the heat out of the water. The sheet of ice spread to every corner of the room and grew thicker until the water underneath was sealed off completely, and had stopped rising.
“That should buy us a little time. I’m a hundred percent sure a seapony can’t break through ice that thick,” said Twilight. She slumped down to think of a way out of the temple. She was interrupted by a loud thud from the ice below. She looked down again. She could still see the seaponies under the ice, vaguely, but they’d been joined by something new. Something much, much bigger. The shape receded from the ice, then charged upwards again, throwing itself against it.
“You said you’re a hundred percent sure, right?” asked Ample.
“Well, maybe more like ninety nine percent,” replied Twilight. The shape slammed against the ice again. It cracked. “On second thought? Run.”
The two mares tore down the hallway, Twilight shouting out to Ample with a warning about the pit trap up ahead just in time for both of them to leap clear of it. Behind them, Twilight heard the ice barrier shatter and the sound of water rushing in. The two emerged outside the temple. The dome of magic above them twisted and shimmered as it fought a losing battle against the pressure of the water that was seeping through. Twilight reinforced the water breathing spell on herself and extended it to Ample as well. Still, once the seaponies got out of the temple she didn’t want to be caught paddling around waiting for the water to fill the dome.
“Ample, I need you trust me, and don’t let go of my hoof,” she said. She reached out a foreleg and felt Ample take hold of it.
“Why? What are you going to-”
Whatever Ample had been about to say was cut off as Twilight fired a short blast of energy at the dome above, dispelling it completely. Twilight threw up a quick shield against the first blast of pressure, but was still nearly swept away as the ocean rushed in around her. In just a few seconds the pocket of air had rocketed to the surface and the temple was submerged once again. The sudden change in pressure sent a plume of sand and dirt up from the ocean floor, and Twilight couldn’t even see Ample through the murk, even though she could feel her clinging to her foreleg. Pushing off from the temple, Twilight kicked at the water in what she hoped was the direction of the ocean’s surface. The churning water would conceal them from the seaponies, but Twilight wasn’t sure how long it would last.
The ascent took less than two minutes, but felt to Twilight like it must have been at least ten. Twilight was overjoyed when her head finally breached the surface and she got her first lungful of natural air. The two mares had come up about fifty meters from the Tranquility, which was rocking violently. The giant air bubble Twilight had just sent up must have nearly capsized it.
The seaponies had gotten there first. A half a dozen tentacles were latched onto the hull, and Twilight could see the monsters trying to pull themselves onto the deck of the ship. Bolts of fire and magic erupting from the ship told Twilight that Reinolds and Luna were fighting back, and seemed to be doing a pretty good job of it. Twilight saw Reinolds stick his head over the side and fire one of the boat’s emergency flares straight down into the face of one of the seaponies, which screamed as it fell back into the water.
“Captain! Over here!” Twilight called out, struggling to be heard over the battle and the water. Twilight saw him look up at them and nod. He’d spotted them.
Unfortunately, so had the seaponies. Three more of them that had been clinging to the hull dropped back into the water, deciding that this prey looked a lot more appetizing and a lot less likely to set them on fire. Twilight was desperately searching her mind for something she could do while floating in the water when Luna leapt off the side of the boat, soaring down towards them with a rope dangling from her mouth. She barely slowed down as she reached them. Twilight and Ample lunged for the lifeline and wrapped their legs around it as it yanked them out of the water, just moments before a half dozen tentacles reached out searching for the morsels that had suddenly been denied to them.
The Princess flew back to the Tranquility and the three of them landed roughly on the deck. Luna turned her head and casually blasted a sea pony that stuck its head over the side of the railing. “These creatures appeared a few minutes ago, and we feared the worst. Were you able to find the dagger?”
Twilight shook her head, sending droplets scattering from her soaking wet mane. “Somepony else took it, and then tried to keep me from following her by flooding the temple. This is Ample Booty, by the way. She was working with her.”
“You were able to overpower her and take her prisoner? Excellent work,” said Luna. Prisoner? Twilight glanced over at Ample, who shrugged.
“Sure, let’s go with that,” said Twilight, “what about these seaponies?”
Luna scoffed. “They present little challenge. We do not anticipate that we will have any difficulty dispatching the rest of them.”
In response the water out over the temple began to churn and foam. The seaponies that were clinging to the Tranquility dropped away and fled back to the depths. The mud and sand in the water had cleared enough that Twilight could make out a massive shape moving towards the surface. The thing that had broken through her ice barrier had gotten out of the temple and followed her here.
Twilight’s stomach dropped as the creature emerged and she got her first good look at it. It was exactly what she had been afraid of; a seapony queen.
Seapony queens were sometimes referred to by sailors as “dragons of the sea,” and survivors told of a single one sinking entire convoys of armed ships. Their thick hides shrugged off spears, magic, and arrows alike, and their jaws could crush reinforced hulls in a single bite. Even worse, they were vicious, bloodthirsty, and cunning, sometimes keeping a few victims alive for days in the hopes of drawing in would-be rescuers to ambush. Twilight thought she might, on her best day and with a lot of luck, be able to escape from one alive. Today was not turning out to be one of her best days.
Before Twilight could fully categorize all the ways she was utterly, completely doomed, she was nearly blinded as a column of light plummeted from the heavens and struck the monster. It screamed in pain as the light enveloped it, burning through its carapace like it wasn’t even there and cooking it alive before the creature even knew what was happening. In a flash, the light faded and the seapony queen just wasn’t there any more. A few meaty chunks that looked like they had once been part of it bobbed in the steaming, boiling waves.
Twilight had read the legends of Luna’s moonfire, but she’d never expected to see it in action.
“As we said, little challenge,” said Luna, “perhaps using moonfire was somewhat excessive, but we felt that ‘twas the only way to be certain.” Luna walked over to where Ample was staring out over the water, her jaw slack. “Thou hath a little...” she gestured at her own cheek. When Ample didn’t respond Luna reached down and wiped away a few bits of ichor that had spattered onto her face. “We will begin questioning you in five minutes. We suggest you cooperate fully,” she said and walked back into the ship’s cabin.
Ample Booty was quite forthcoming about Gumdrop Giggles after that. The ‘pirate crew’ was more of a criminal gang based out of Pensacolta than anything else, and one that Gumdrop had been running for some time. While they’d mostly been just a loose knit bunch of local criminals and thugs, it seemed that over the last few years their boss had decided to upgrade, bringing in new muscle from out of town and becoming more ambitious. It was about then that she’d started regaling her crew with the stories of Ouroboros, and how they’d be ruling the seas soon.
While Ample had been willing to tell them what they wanted to know so far, she clammed up when they asked where Gumdrop Giggles was going.
“No way, I’m not going to rat them out. Besides, even if I told you they’ll have moved by the time you get there. You’ll never catch them,” her voice had more than a hint of pride in it.
“So you are useless to us after all then. You attempted to murder Twilight earlier, why should we not simply drop you in the middle of the ocean right now and sail away? You look to be a strong swimmer, you might even have a one in five chance of reaching shore before you drown. Or something catches you,” said Luna. Twilight shuddered. She was pretty sure this was an act, but the Princess was a little bit too good at it for comfort.
“D-do your worst, then. I won’t talk,” said Ample.
“Actually, Princess, we don’t need her to tell us that. Before they took the knife from me, I slipped a tracking spell onto it. I should be able to follow it back to wherever they’re going,” said Twilight.
Luna glanced over at her, expression wavering somewhere between impressed and annoyed at the interruption. “Very well. It seems this is your lucky day Ample. We’re nearly at the docks now anyway. What do you think we should do with you?”
Ample blinked as she processed the question. “Umm... Let me go?” she suggested.
Luna just chuckled. “So you can run home and warn the others that we’re on our way? We think not. We guess it would be easiest to just kill you now. You’ve been modestly helpful, we would make it quick and fairly painless. Unless you have a better option?”
“So tie me up down here then, you can always just turn me in later on,” said Ample. Luna considered this, but shook her head.
“We suspect that you only suggest that because you believe you can untie any knot we come up with. Care to try again?” asked Luna. Ample threw up her hooves and then crossed them over her chest, refusing to answer.
Twilight considered the problem. “Princess, what about an Oath of Binding? She swears not to leave the room, and that way none of us has to stay behind to watch her,” she said.
“That would be acceptable,” said Luna, nodding. “Ample, are you familiar with that sort of magic?”
“A little bit. I make a promise, and you cast a spell that keeps me from breaking it, right?” said Ample.
“More or less. If you swear an Oath not to leave this room, we will allow you to stay here while we deal with the remainder of your ‘crew.’”
Ample thought about this for a moment. “Okay, deal. Do it.” Princess Luna’s horn glowed and sparkled. The sparks of magic coalesced around Ample Booty and hovered there expectantly. “I swear not to leave this room, unless I ask Princess Luna, Twilight, or Captain Reinolds for permission to do so first,” said Ample. As she did the magic flowed into her, and she glowed gently as the Oath took hold.
“Forgive us if we ask that you test it before we go,” said Luna, gesturing towards the open door. Ample got up and tried to walk through it, but didn’t get even a half step beyond the threshold before some invisible force threw her back. Luna smirked. “If you attempt to break the Oath, we will be alerted. Keep in mind that we are being quite merciful in this matter. Cross us and we will reconsider that approach.”
Twilight and Luna walked out of the room and began climbing the stairs back to the boat’s deck. Ample Booty would be confined to the storage room until the following morning, when they could turn her over to law enforcement. “Um, Princess, you weren’t ever really going to kill Ample, right?” asked Twilight.
“It did not become necessary to do so,” Luna replied. The Princess had many good qualities, but Twilight had long since come to accept that her reassuring pep talks were a bit lacking. “Twilight, you are limping. Did something happen to your leg?”
Twilight looked down at the ankle she had turned back in the temple. Now that the rush of adrenaline had faded, she’d noticed that it hurt quite a bit. “Nothing I can’t handle, Princess,” said Twilight.
“Let me see.” Luna took Twilight’s hoof between her own and gently turned it. Twilight winced as pain shot up her leg. “It seems to be a slight sprain. I can heal it, but you’ll need to avoid putting too much force on it for the next half hour or so.” Without waiting for Twilight to reply she channeled a gentle wave of magic into the limb, which immediately stopped hurting.
Twilight pushed her hoof against the ground, testing her weight on it. It did feel a lot better. “Thanks, Luna, but I can’t just sit around here waiting for a half hour before we go out tracking the dagger. The way my night’s been going so far, there’s probably going to be a lot of running.”
“We will address that when the time comes. Now come, if Gumdrop does have all three artifacts she could begin undoing the bindings at any time,” said Luna.
“Princess, she could really have figured out how to control Ouroboros, right? The magic to control something so powerful must be complicated.”
Luna hesitated. “It would not be as difficult you might believe. The most difficult parts of the spell are already woven into the dagger by its very nature. Harnessing that magic would be comparatively simple. Sealing Ouroboros away was the path we chose not because controlling it would have been difficult, but because we feared the consequences of so much power in a single set of hooves. Either way, we cannot take the chance of somepony tampering with the seal.”
The two of them emerged onto the deck just as the boat slid into the dock. Twilight gripped one of the ropes and tied it in as Reinolds emerged from the cabin. “Did she tell you where we could find the knife?” he asked.
“Twilight placed a tracking spell on it. Ample Booty is contained for the time being. The three of us must make haste and find the dagger before they attempt to use it to summon Ouroboros. Captain, Twilight’s right foreleg is sprained. We have placed our healing magic upon it, but she will need time to recover fully. Until then, you’ll need to carry her so she does not slow our progress,” said Luna.
“What‽” cried both Twilight and Reinolds.
“Um, please?” asked Luna.
The two unicorns blinked and looked at one another. Twilight recovered first. “Fine. As long as it’s just for the half hour. And none of us ever speaks of this again,” she said.
“Agreed. Climb on,” said Reinolds, rolling his eyes as he let Twilight clamber up onto his back.
Twilight activated the tracking spell she’d placed on the dagger. It had been a slapdash thing, kludged together at the last second. It would work, but the readings it gave wouldn’t be specific or reliable until she got closer to her quarry. She let the spell point her toward her objective and stuck a hoof out in the general direction of the signal, finding that it pointed her towards the middle of Pensacolta. “That way,” she said and the three of them took off, Reinolds carrying Twilight along the ground while Luna took to the air. Twilight winced. Being carried around like this was humiliating. Still, at least she wasn’t likely to run into anypony she knew from Ponyville, right?
--------------------
Lyra and Bon Bon stepped out from Pensacolta’s train station into the cool night air. The trip had taken far longer than it should have. Delays along the first leg of the trip had resulted in them missing their connection in Manehatten, and an unexpected three hour layover before the next train. At least they’d finally arrived, even if it was the middle of the night.
“Oh, come on Bonnie. So we had a rough time getting here. We’ve still got all week to enjoy the city! The beaches! The amenities! The restaurants!” pitched Lyra to her filly friend.
“Hmph,” was Bon Bon’s only reply. As far as she was concerned, their vacation together was off to an awful start. It was already after midnight, and she wanted nothing more than to get to their hotel and collapse.
“We’re on vacation! We’re getting away from it all! Celestia knows you need a break. How long did we figure it’s been since you took time off from working the candy store? Nearly three years? We’ll sleep in late tomorrow, OK? Or... Well, we don’t have to sleep late, but we don’t have to get out of bed either. I’m sure we’ll think of something to do, right?” Lyra leaned over and gently bit down on a particular spot behind her partner’s left ear. Bon Bon let out the adorable ‘eep’ that Lyra would never grow tired of.
“Stop that! Somepony might see us,” Bon Bon hissed.
Lyra just chuckled and sidled up to her special somepony. “So? Nopony in this city even knows who we are. Think about it. Spa appointments and sunbathing all day long. We can even go skinny dipping in the ocean!”
“Lyra, we’re naked nearly all the time. We’re skinny dipping literally every time we go swimming.”
“But it sounds so much naughtier when you call it skinny dipping,” pointed out Lyra, undeterred. “Besides, as exciting as the days are going to be, they’ve got nothing on what I’ve got planned for the nights...” Lyra trailed off, the better to let her lover’s mind run away with her. Sure enough, she started to blush again a moment later. “Best of all, none of the usual Ponyville craziness. That’s what you most need a break from, isn’t it? All the monster invasions and crazy stuff that seems to come around every other week. I promise, none of that kind of stuff happens here.”
“This way, Princess,” called out a voice from down the street. A unicorn stallion galloped down the way, a very familiar-looking lavender unicorn riding on his back. The ponies rode up to the train station and stopped. The lavender mare looked around, her eyes falling onto Lyra and Bon Bon. She did a double take and stared at the pair. “Lyra? Bon Bon?”
“Twilight?” ventured Lyra. “What are you doing here?”
“Oh, uh, saving Equestria again, I guess. What about you?” replied Twilight.
“Vacation,” replied Bon Bon. A tangible atmosphere of awkwardness descended upon the four ponies as none of them could think of anything to say next.
“Twilight Sparkle,” called a voice from above. Lyra and Bon Bon looked up, and they instinctively dropped down into a bow when the recognized Luna, Princess of the Night, on the edge of a nearby rooftop. “There is no time for petty small talk now. The fate of this city hangs in the balance. We must stop the summoning of the ancient evil that is even now in motion, or every life in this place is forfeit!”
Twilight blanched, and her horn glowed briefly. “That way,” she said and the three took off down a side street.
Lyra and Bon Bon were left gaping at the retreating trio. A moment passed in silence before Bon Bon picked up their bags and turned back towards the train station. “Buck this. We’re vacationing at a ski lodge this week.”
------------
Not much later, Twilight, Reinolds, and Luna arrived at a warehouse in the middle of a seemingly abandoned part of town. “We must be cautious,” said Luna from above, “we believe we felt some sort of magical ritual begin a moment ago. They are beginning to unravel the seal. We are not sure what the consequences would be of violently disrupting it, but we are in no hurry to find out.”
Twilight nodded. If the subtle approach was what was called for, she could do that. She got down off of Reinolds. It had probably been long enough that her ankle was mostly healed. She pushed open the back door of the warehouse, and the three ponies snuck inside. She was struck by how empty the warehouse was. She’d half expected it to be crawling with Gumdrop Giggle’s lackeys, but there didn’t seem to be anypony there. Twilight wondered if she’d found the wrong building, but her tracking spell was shouting that the dagger was here somewhere. She held up a hoof as she spotted light spilling out from underneath a door on the far wall. She crept up to it. Carefully... Quietly...
Twilight wrapped the door in her magic and yanked it off its hinges, tossing it behind her and charging into the room. The room had been prepared for a magical ritual, and Twilight spotted the plate, bowl, and dagger in the middle of a carefully crafted spell circle, candles strategically positioned to channel mana through the artifacts for some nefarious purpose. On the circle’s far side were two cloaked figures. The pink wings protruding from one of them left little doubt that Twilight had found Gumdrop Giggles. She was sure she knew who the other figure was, too.
“The jig is up, Professor Buried Secrets,” shouted Twilight. “I know you’re the one who helped the pirates rob the museum, even if I don’t know how you could let them do something so awful. Then you pointed them towards the temple where they could find the dagger, all for a share of the riches they’ll have once they’ve taken control of Ouroboros.” Twilight chuckled. “I didn’t realize this until now, but you basically just ripped off the plot of Daring Do and the Spear of the Windigos.”
The cloaked figure threw up its hooves. “Spoilers! Come on, that book isn’t even out yet. I was gonna read it.”
Twilight’s heart dropped. The voice was familiar, but it wasn’t Professor Secrets’.
“...Bronze?”
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So how many people are going to come look at this because they think it's connected to yesterday's episode? Oh well.
Anyway, the big reveal of the plot twist that 80% of you probably figured out like 3 chapters ago. Hopefully I surprised somebody.
2 Chapters to go. I'd like to have this done by the end of 2012, considering I first started it in December 2011
Huzzah, an update! Loved that scene with Lyra an bonbon, hilarious!
Wow, poor Twilight's heart just got broken.
804313
That one scene in this chapter? Just for you!
1342540
She might not be wrong... 'Didn't' doesn't mean 'can't'
1461812
I see her as still mortal, still prone to being worn down by lots of running fights. Not somepony you'd want to meet in a dark alley, but not unbeatable either. As for several of your other points, well, this chapter.
1585978
Can't deny there's a couple similarities there. I was think more GLADoS than the Joker, but perhaps the two Aren't So Different.
Ooooooo.... ouch...
1723850
1723874
It's just cracked right now. I don't smash it to pieces until next chapter...
1723806 MOAR PLZ
I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you damn kids.
1679746
To be fair, nobody in Canterlot seems to recognize the Mane 6 in canon either. Except the one guard in the library, which is where she probably lived more or less. So it might be a plot hole, but it's a canonical plot hole.
1724068
"...if it weren't for that demigodess and her ridiculously overqualified bodyguard" doesn't have quite the same ring to it
1724016
I can only read "Spoilers!" in River Song's voice.
I saw the thing with bronze coming
but I still surprised me
Dumbledore dies.
Ok, the train station scene makes up for the previous chapter
1723851 Really? Between the "pathetic" taunt and Luna responding by choking Twilight with shadow, I thought it was a straight shout out.
Anyway, I can see two ways the story can progress from now.
1) Being a Daring Doo fan, Bell actually gets genre savvy enough to surrender. (There is no way for them to complete the ritual now anyway) Hopefully they manage to subdue Gumdrop before she does something stupid and the whole gang is taken away once Horatio's team arrives (Obviously, they have just finished analysing the crucial clue and are rushing towards the warehouse as we speak)
2) The villains continue with cliche villainy and the Mexican stand-off turns into an open fight. The ritual gets disrupted, the villains horribly devoured (with either Gumdrop or Bell dying last, forfeiting the chance to escape for the last ditch attempt to resume control of the ritual). As the warehouse burns down around them, the heroes are left with no choice but to try to kill the vengeful sea god before he awakens to full power.
Fun fact: Twilight Sparkle uses a sophisticated triple barrier setup when formally duelling but not a single passive defense when actually fighting for her life. (i'll just forget the protective amulets - I assume they don't work outside the gym).
I am curious about the naming. Hippocamp translates as seahorse but the actual sea ponies are something like flesh-eating mermaids in your story. So, where did the name originate from? (the temple was clearly built for land dwellers. The again, it was built as a gauntlet of traps rather than a place of worship - what was the purpose of a giant gemmed statue in the main hall?)
Also Ouroboros - not a very threatening name (he usually appears as an alegory for time or cyclical events. There are a couple snake-related names that would work better for snake themed ancient monstrocity - Jormungandr, Tiamat, Orochi or Nidhogg, not to look too far.) I assume you chose it to keep the theme of a Greek-sounding civilisation? (since hydras are actual monsters here, I think Scylla would be the closest thing here)
aww i liked bronze, I knew that he would probably have been apart of this plot but I did hope, and now he is in for a world of hurt because as the old say goes hell hath no fury like a scorned mare
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I watched that movie years ago. I didn't mean to toss the shout out in but it's entirely possible it bubbled up from my subconscious. Batman Beyond was pretty awesome, so I'll just go ahead and say it was a serendipitous coincidence that I don't mind keeping in.
One of those. Or parts of both. Or something else entirely
I sort of figured that Twilight has a couple passive defense enchantment up and running all the time, which is why she can fall multiple stories without serious injury and shrug off most of the other hurts she's built up over the last several chapters. I could probably be more explicit about it, though. Or you could just chalk it up to general pony superpowers.
I pictured the Hippocamp as a tribe of land-dwelling ponies not so different from Equestrians, just a different group politically before they got folded into Equestria itself. The temple could be dual purpose, I suppose. Or maybe it was just the style of the time to build your trap-filled temple with overly elaborate architecture, and Twilight was so fixated on getting the dagger she Sequence Broke and skipped getting the grappling hook that was supposed to help her get around.
Never trust the romantic interest.
I will be honest, I saw Bronze being the traitor coming a mile away. He may as well have been wearing a sign that said "I am evil and will betray you."
Still, good chapter! I loved the cameo of Lyra and Bon Bon.
Ouch. Bronze.
I love it, after so long this finally gets an update :D
And to cheer you up: you surprised me :3
I like to let my fantasy go wild with all possible scenarios when i'm reading a story, But to do that i need to know the writing style of the author, and need to have read more than those few chapters we have here ^^ So with most short storys like this i just wing it and let the author surprise me :D
1723806 Nope, not surprised.
Don't feel bad though. I'm a super-sleuth who figured out Judge Doom was actually the psycho toon who killed Eddy's brother about half-way through "Who Framed Roger Rabbit".
Yup, with me on the case he would've been... *puts on sunglasses*.. Judge Doomed..
YEAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Please have the climactic battle involve a teleport chase that makes a brief stop by the ski area.
Partly because of Lyra and Bon-Bon, and partly because skiing ponies.
My headcannon is Lyra skis, and sitting as she does is the only safe way to ride a chairlift.
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True in real life and pony fics alike!
Crap, I accidentally made myself sad with real-life disillusionment.
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You know that that I've got a half dozen more stories posted on my account, right? You can read those while you're waiting.
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Sorry, I can confirm for sure that Lyra and Bon Bon were a one-shot cameo. Bon Bon wants nothing more to do with this $#!& and made sure she went somewhere where the rest of the story won't find her
IT LIVES! IT LIVES! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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In that case I shall fire my headcannons at your head.
Or possibly write a one-shot continuation after you finish, if that's alright?
Equestria needs more skiing ponies.
What a twist... i thought about it being him but i thought naw he wouldnt
... right? But yes you did... and what do you mean you want to break her heart next chapter! Thats cruel and i approve! 
Totally knew that it would be Bronze the second Gumdrop mentioned a museum contact. It would have been no fun if it really was Secrets.
I see an interrobang and i like it. It's nice to see one of these used in a fan fiction. I wished everyone used them commonly. I mean, why it's there a button on my keyboard for it‽ There should be.
Ouroboros™ (Do not purchase if seal is tampered with or broken)
I say we dust off, nuke the sea pony queen from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Oh god, the cliches this story has. Also, luna nukes down an almost unkillable monster, but when the fate of the world is in peril, she waits on a boat? And what the hell happened to Twilight being to tired to cast a spell?
Between Horatio's horrible puns and the cliches, I feel like I've just fallen into a Daring Do novel. With Angelina Jolie subbing.
“As we said, little challenge,” said Luna, “perhaps using moonfire was somewhat excessive, but we felt that ‘twas the only way to be certain.”
Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
i956.photobucket.com/albums/ae50/marsman61/GWJ/nuke-it-from-orbit.jpg
And many lawls were had that day.
Moonfire is awesome and Luna is awesome for being so non-challant about it.
Lyra and Bon Bon scene is made of funny. The teasing and the their reaction made me chuckle.
Now on to the next chapter because of the cliffhanger!
dashie.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw3071-teinejC3A4_ponilangassa.png
too bad he wasn't important to the plot.
he was so brave
on a side note I totally did not see that plot twist coming, then again i am running on almost no sleep so maybe that's OK...
BEHOLD, THE SEAPONY QUEEN!
th04.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/i/2011/359/a/7/sea_pony_lyra_is_watching_you_by_retardude-d4d8c17.jpg
Moonfire, eh? So that's what Nightmare Moon was doing on the Moon for a thousand years: macgyvering a bajillion rayguns out of rocks and covering the near side of the Moon with them. Now to steal the remote…
*INSERT EVIL LAUGHTER HERE*
The only reason why wasn't Luna the one going into the temple is because the story would have ended.
Luna goes into the bubble of the temple, lands gently.. then goes into the building heading straight to the top tower, disintegrating anypony who tries to counter her, gets the dagger, "gently persuades" Gumdrop to give her the rest of the artifacts, then everypony leave, and the bad guys who stayed alive are put into jail. The End.
I read WAY too many stories if Bronze being the bad guy was that obvious to me >.>
>> “I swear not to leave this room, unless I ask Princess Luna, Twilight, or Captain Reinolds for permission to do so first,” said Ample.
There's an obvious loophole there, but Ample is pretty aware at this point that she's still alive because her captors are being merciful, so... hmm. I'm actually not sure whether "I never said I had to get permission" is an upcoming plot point or not. Well played.
>> Ample Booty is contained for the time being.
I bucking knew it!!!
I suspected it from the get go!!!
I'm being a boastful asshole!!!!
I should probably stop!!!!!
As soon as i read 'Shoo Be Doom' I burst out laughing and my friend looked at me like I was crazy. I love how warped you made the descriptions of the sea ponies from the generation one sea ponies
I also really loved the Lyra and Bon Bon sceen
Yeah, orbital strikes usually are...
Aaand this is when figured out it's Bronze. :P
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Having grown up a socially-awkward book nerd myself, I can't imagine Twilight Sparkle overlooking the obvious out there - even with the whole nearly-dying-several-times-over-in-the-last-day thing she has going on. That being said, if they are not present, has she actually asked them for permission?
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And your unicorn guard pony too!
I SO CALLED IT!
Heh, totally saw that coming