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Discord, Tirek, and Grogar have been friends for longer than any of them will care to admit. But friendships tend to fade with time. What will happen when Discord's old friends release him from his stone prison? Will they relive their glory days? Or will they finally get fed up with each other? Inspired in part by the blog Discorderlyconduct on tumblr.
Going to have some adult humor in it, so if that isn't your cup of tea, I'd suggest passing on this one.
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Tirek? YES.
G1 Shoutout to the best of them. You instacool guy you.
Well, as one of those among this story's first readers, I will put forth an economical yet resounding and thought-provoking response to this chapter. It is as follows:
MOAR
Seriously though, I love how you characterize Tirek and Grogar (though you may want to mention at some point what they look like, just to be through). I'm insanely curious as to what direction this story will take.
I know very little about anything before G4, but I have to say, this sounds awesome, and very promising.
737186 I could tell you anything on g3 and below. G1 was the best one next to g4.
I grew up with g1, so it's easy to answer any questions regarding the earlier generations.
And yes, let's get it outta the way: Yes I was a Brony before it went mainstream. People keep saying that. Even though it's true.
I am intrigued
Very interesting twist/parody for the actual show.
Hah, the minute I saw the chapter title, I immediately thought of Tirek in some gospel church backflipping up the aisle. Fave'd for that.
737179
Grogar is the Ram in the picture, Tirek is the centaur.
Have some timeline from Disorderly-Conduct:
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There you go, the story in chronological order, sort of... If you discount the time travel...
Wonderful!
I must keep an eye on the progression of this, a most promising beginning.
This is possibly the best thing ever.
Also, some Ahuizotl please.
Bros 4 life! I LOVE IT!
737545
Well, yes, I know that, and I'm sure most of your readers know that, but I'm just mentioning that if you want the story to stand alone from discorderlyconduct (so that the tumblr isnt required reading to understand what's going on) you may want to allude to it.
Or not, your call
737568
I was under the impression that Ahuizotl was a fictional character, like Daring Do. I wouldn't mind being wrong, of course
737773
Considering the pony world is one where All Myths are Real, and Ahuizotl is a mythological being, it could happen. I always saw them as third-person autobiographies myself.
737773
Yo, author here. To clear up any confusion, this isn't really related to the tumblr at all. The only reason I mentioned it is because that's where I originally got the idea of them knowing each other from. Everything else is stuff I made up.
737825
I actually am toying with the idea of him showing up as a cameo, but I'm not 100% on it just yet.
lol
so what does discord do to impress the ladies? Chaos, of course
Great chapter, cant wait for more!
Will the mane six and the princesses find out about Tirek and Grogar really wan't to see their reactions to the fact that only does Discord have friends but who those friends are.
Well, normal bros get plastered and pick up chicks but what happens when you and your bros have almost god like powers. Here's the the thing I can still see them hanging out in the parking lot of a 7-11, smoking pot and playing Battlefield 3 till 7am.
Brilliant Borgia keep up the good writing old boy, Discord is gonna be a riot in this story.
753166
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(If you know where that image is from, bonus intarnetz for you)
753259
There will be plenty of regular bro moments in the coming chapters , I assure you.
754829
Trying to do that in the story without having it sound hammy handed. Its tough to work the timeline I've made up for this into the framework of conversations friends would have. But basically, Tirek the centaur and Grogar the goat were old school G1 baddies who were defeated indefinitely at the end of their respective movies/episodes. Here, they did their thing long before even Discord begins his initial rule of Equestria. Think around the time of the first Hearth's Warming Eve.
758230
Best bro moments getting drunk and kicked out of a zoo and trying to cover up a certain smell from my mom's car while driving to the store high out our minds and very paranoid.
737545 Butt Trumpet? I spy a reference...
758230
OH MY PONY GOD.
AMANDA SHOW.
I JUST GOT SLAPPED WITH MY CHILDHOOD... Well, you were already beating me to death with it with all the G1. I had a fun mixed childhood.
So like Seinfield it's a show about nothing? In seriousness I love that you play this fic up as comedy about three villains just just happen to be friends since they were kids who went through stuff like acne, drugs, prom and getting drunk and smashing mail boxes. It's more like evil summer camp mixed sitcom roommate angst rather than the Legion of Doom.
802935
Exactly! There will be some bigger plot elements toward the end, but the majority of the story will be in the Seinfeld, show about nothing style.
mmmmmmmm, smooooooze ramen.
yummy!
lol smooze ramen.
Great story, I also enjoy the show-about-nothingness that it has. cant wait for what you have planned next though!
Playcolt that's priceless!
Discord growing weed?
matthewratzloff.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/take-my-money.jpg
I KEEP THROWING 50'S AT THE SCREEN But IT DOES EXACTLY FUCK ALL!! WHY ISN'T IT WORKING!!111
Keep on truckin' and I think it's really funny. I'd use more frat-boy type humor and slap stick, but to each their own.
chzgifs.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/funny-gifs-meh-out-loud.gif
Peace Out.
Well, in all honesty, it isn't that funny.
I mean, it has its moments of pretty clever humor, but nothing that had me falling on the ground. BUT, that doesn't mean it isn't good. Hell, I don't think it needs to be funny to be interesting, and learning the backstory between these characters and how they relate to each other is all I needed to keep checking.
While I like to try and keep to a schedule (Fantastic job I'm doing on the Starlit, since I both got sick AND am having a hard time resolving an in-story problem and had to push the release back) and at this point I'd put it on hiatus until I was able to get my thoughts organized, buuut in all honesty I'd prefer just the occasional update as a side-project thing.
Keep up the good work, dude.
It is not really that funny but it's still a good story so keep the update's coming.
I find your story pretty funny, but I do like the interaction of the characters a little more. (I think that's where the real comedy comes from)
Also, I am completely alright if you put it on hiatus, and I would be happy to check out your other Fic.
Yea well it wasn't actually that funny, But that doesn't really matter because it was a good read all the same. Personally I'd go with option 1 if and only if you have other idea's in the works. Otherwise I will read the rest of this story.
Oh and I liked that part about discord growing pot.
Well, I finally got around to finishing this. Seriously, this is funny. Don't stop, man.
It makes sense that Discord would be producing some kind of hallucinatory drug. I can already see him taking a drag on a massive Bob-Marley-Style Joint.
And I was surprised that Grogar, being a goat, would be apprehensive about eating the Smooze. (I looked after a goat once....
never again...)
And I was wondering, do the three protagonists have any connection to Squirk, the octopus-king of the MLP sea, and his cockney-accented Lobster Minion Krank?
Hm, I feel a disturbance in the force.
In my eyes, this whole fic sounded like a big, fat prologue to me.
The idea, that Discord raised with other, eew..gods-of-evil-stuff is cool. To make a meet-again instead of a childhood fiction is cool, too.
Combining both ideas to a comedy fiction is awesome. And here is the big, bad BUT:
The fact, that there is a big past behind the three main characters, including several shenaningans like trying to destroy Equestria and stuff gives a HUGE imagination task to the reader IMO. At some points I was like: Let's pretent is was this way X. Would be really cool.
However, this is an atmosphere (cheer now, if spelled right!) that is more on this 'Dark' / 'Adventure' sides.
Why? Just look, as we all know 'Comedy' can be pretty dark while 'Dark' happenings can be also really funny. And the fact that this fiction has A LOT potential for charakter evolving (Tirek as a fallen god with Discord as some sort of almighty big brother) could drive the whole thing into a tragedy one.
(As we all know Comedy <-> Tragedy) - What leads to some conflict between that setting and the comedy figure called Discord.
I don't know how much you planned that and what are you up to (seems like some sort of sitcom-style to me) but it seems like you could need some distance to see the true size of this idea. I guess if you're going to seek for those 'darker' parts you'll understand what their mean.
Also, Discord seems to be the only comedian character in this story so far. As much I love your way to write him - one character doesn't make a story go a whole new way.
Let me say what I really think in discordian words:
When in doubt, fuck it.
When not in doubt, get in doubt.
If you feel that there should be some space between the story and you, then take it. Otherwise I would love to see more, even if it's only as a sideproject. Because..actually it IS funny. Discord rocks!
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It's not exactly side-splitting humor, but that's not what you're going for, is it? The humor is much more dry and sarcastic, and I love it for that. I think it's a great, fun read, and I really hope you continue updating.
As far as your EQD situation goes, don't worry too much about it. I submitted a fic to them and it was rejected (surprise surprise). The reasons for rejection were for things that they suggested themselves in their 'omnibus,' things that I specifically changed my style to incorporate. So, don't stop writing just because you got a rejection from a site with notoriously bad submission guidelines for fiction. Do what you think seems right.
Well, I'm quite enjoying the story myself. I like how the characters are portrayed and the humor is nice, not laid on too thick so as to make it a constant stream of jokes one-uping each other. I like the pacing and how everyone interacts. As for where you want to go with the story, I think it depends a lot on how hung up you are on making it funny and how long you want it to be. You could keep it in a sitcom style if you wanted, but then it won't seem like a whole lot is happening. Some one must have noticed that Discord has vanished by now, so I think it would be a bit odd to not have anything occur. You could wait until the end of the story to have progression, but if you don't show what's happening over at Canterlot or Ponyville, it'll feel kind of rushed. You could go for an adventure theme, but keep the character interaction. You could go more Tragedy or Dark. You really could do just about anything, you have it set up so that there could be several big things that happen. Tirek feels totally useless compared to Grogar and Discord, you could play off of that and not just by having it be a betrayal or something like that. They could go on misadventures to get Tirek's powers restored or attempt to retake Equestria. They could dick around in the castle while the ponies try to figure out what happened. You could have the main six face them off for no reason while the villains chat aimlessly and completely ignore them. You get the point, there is literally an innumerable amount of things you could do. They can be serious or totally silly, or both. If you feel that put off by EQDs criticisms, then take a break, get a feel for how you want things to go. There's no need to rush. So on the whole I'd say ether option one or two, what ever you end up doing should work out fine. (as long as there are no drastic changes to the already laid out character personalities.)
On a side note though, I already think the humor is fine. If you want to make it more comedic then by all means, but don't sacrifice the story or character attitudes just so the fic can squeeze in more jokes. Forced humor can really ruin a story IMO.
It's perfect the way it is. I don't know about everybody else but I think this story is awesome. I almost cried when I got to the last page and realised that I would have to wait for the next one to come out.
Well, I like it. ...I wouldn't put on hiatus, but I suppose it's up to you.
797222
737545
By butt-trumpet do you mean because he has a TRUMPETING BUTT?
That's absurd!
Why you no include Chrysalis arc?
I likes it.
its realy good
Hilariously, Ahuizotl's real.
737825
737568
737773
YOU GUYS CALLED IT!
It's not hilarious, but it is amusing.
It's also two years without an update...
Don't let those EQD guys get you down! They might not think it's funny, but who gives a buck what they think? As long as someone likes your story, or thinks it's funny, you know your doing something right!
737545
Can I get a URL to the beginning of this story?