After a night of celebrating Fluttershy's engagement, the mane six awaken to discover a series of strange events with no recollection of what happened the night before. Rated M for Language, Drug content and Sexual themes.
Chapters (7)
ROFLBED0
Joined 9th Jun, 2012 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- GnollReader · 121k words · 1,309 21 · 19k views
- Anonymous Assassin · 6.6k words · 888 47 · 18k views
- The card holder · 9.4k words · 917 52 · 13k views
- Snake Staff · 4.1k words · 553 35 · 8.3k views
- Iridescence T Wind · 241k words · 1,000 90 · 15k views
- Garuda IV · 811k words · 839 78 · 16k views
- chief maximus · 4.1k words · 497 42 · 6.8k views
- ImNew2023 · 109k words · 475 40 · 8.3k views
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.13 seconds
Total duration
902 users online
579,180 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Thank Celestia this isn't the one I saw on FF.net. Anyway, it's looking pretty good so far. I shall follow every update.
-Randomosity19
Very interesting concept. Misspelled celebrating in the description.
Its a little hard to follow the dialog, and it seems like the characterization is a biit off, but this isn't really the type of crossover you'd take seriously
Still, I'd like to see where this is going. Consider me following this.
Interesting idea, and I'm curious about where it's heading. But you need to get yourself a prereader and edit this thing. The story could be great, but just trying to read it hurts my brain. You try to move too quick through the intros, there's no setup of the scene, and personally it got very hard to keep reading before the flash back. I'd say rewrite, separate the lines of dialogue, take some time to give the readers a setup. Let the scene relax a bit.
Rated M Then Incomplete | Rating: Teen
This is PRO drugs plus ponies equal epicness
I like the concept but there are alot of errors and they re so out of character i mean rainbow is too much of a bitch and fluttershy is a whore who accepts a marraige proposel after sex and being told that shes loved one time. Characterization is ur biggest fall atleast to my thought. Simmer down with the cursing too, not saying to take it off but too much cursing can kill conversation big time. I ll keep reading though, i know i sound like some asshole critic but those are my thoughts on ur first chapter. I ll be waiting for chapter 2.
On a professional level, this is actually pretty badly written
However, I find myself enjoy it, so I have to say good job
I agree with silver tongue.
This is so incredibly bad. I love it.
Glad to see this fic on here, can't wait for the rest
aww mother of mercy this is funny as hell. i fell over picturing AJ pole dancing ad when twilight found her.... surprise left behind.
interesting concept. While its possible too hand-wave the Drugs, Sex, and Violence as what was necessary to make the blend, there were still a lot of issues with this.
The Pacing and blocking for one wasn't that great, you should always use one paragraph for whenever one character talks. Almost everything the character's say was either about Drugs, Sex, Violence or Profanity, which of course seeing as what this was a blend of a certain level of that is okay, but everyone was really Out of Character through out and you needed to have some Dialog that shows them being friends or that there the actual characters.
Also everything moved a bit too fast. In a single paragraph they got to the church, had the wedding, and everyone wished them luck on the honeymoon. Try to slow down the story and capture some of the scenes a bit better, instead of trying your best to tell the story as fast as you can.
Tl;dr, try to stay in character a bit more, work on the blocking, and pacing. Also try to get some pre-readers, they can save lives
Hahahahaha Now I bet Celestia wants some
You sir. You are mercilessly raping every single thing I love about these ponies.
I love this sh*t! Please keep it coming!!
how in the name of friendship is magic does on "finger" with hooves
but really funny
im soon to be a married man
big macintosh is a human
loving the story by the way
Are they humans or ponies? You've got a gag about fingering, and then one about Pinkie being well stacked.