Honestly? I have no idea why I wrote this.
I mean I already have another story going on don't I?
Well the thing is this idea just wouldn't leave!
*leans back in chair*
So enjoy anyway.
*falls off his chair*
As every Pony fic begins; it was a bright and sunny day in Ponyville. Twilight was sitting in her library, being the isolationist bookworm that she was, she had decided to spend this bright and sunny day reading some of her books.
"Cabinets and tables by Horizontal surface." Twilight announced to nopony. "The last book in the entire library that I haven't read yet." She looked it over; all in all it looked pretty bland. "And I can see why."
Looking up at the dusty clock on her wall she noticed something peculiar; nothing of particular interest had happened today yet.
That probably doesn't sound very strange but something was always happening in Poniville. Just last week, Twilight and her friends had fought against the immortal and evil Tirek the dark Cantaur and his rainbow of darkness.
It had taken an entire afternoon!
She was happy that nothing was threatening the existence of Equestria today but it still seemed like something should be happening.
Dear Celestia she was bored and wanted something to happen.
Maybe she could go see one of her friends, maybe Applejack was about to lose her farm again in a deal, or Pinkie was causing the destruction of reality again. She shook her head, no offense to her friends but maybe she should try to ask somepony else.
And then it occurred to her, a thought that never would have crossed her mind otherwise.
She will ask Spike what he is doing.
Lightning clashed outside her window, despite it being the middle of the day and with no clouds in the sky. She couldn't believe that the thought had crossed her mind not that she hated the idea, Spike was her trusted assistance and he was like a brother to her, or a son, or a sister if that one spell's side effects turned up again. He had always been with her through all of her adventures. Well, in spirit at least. And he'll be here well after she is gone. So she will ask Spike what he is doing today.
"Spike!" She called out for her Dragon; she did not know what he did everyday so he could be anywhere. She walked around the library trying to find her assistant but she just could not find him.
He's not here She thought. What if Spike has never been here? What if all this time he was all just a dream?! What if-
A pain bucket had fallen from on high and had landed on her head, spreading paint everywhere. Twilight took this in stride and levitated the paint can off of her head.
"Paint?..." She questioned, grabbing a towel to wipe it off, inspecting the paint she made an odd observation; the paint was a cyan color, much like her friend Rainbow Dash.
"Curious-er and curious-er..." She remarked, looking up to where the can had fallen; it had come from upstairs near Spike's room.
"Spike?" Twilight called while climbing the stairs. "Why did a paint can come crashing onto me? Are you planning on painting the library again?" She neared the door to his room. "Because you didn't tell me and I have a few ideas about renovations I think you'd like to hear!" She have a few schematics for an emergency mecha transformation for the library in case of a giant lizard attack like she had read about in Japony, though those might have just been fiction.
"There's this laser defense system I'd like to set up but I would need you to test it!" She was right outside his door at this point, paint still hung in gobs from her mane making Twilight sigh.
It's going to take forever to get this out of my mane.
"Spike?" She shouted, pounding on the door. It wasn't like Spike to ignore his friend.
"Spike? Are you ignoring me-AAAHHH!" She had opened the door and was greeted with a horrifying sight;
Spike stood in the middle of the room surrounded by paint cans and brushes, his scales painted over with the cyan paint. His spines were each painted in a different color of the rainbow, even his eyes were a different color and around his neck.
All in all he was the spitting image of Rainbow Dash, you know, if she was a Dragon.
He even wore the Element of loyalty around his neck, the necklace that the multicolored mare would wear.
Spike stared at his adoptive mother/sister/brother if that spell came up again, in shock. He clearly didn't expect her to see him like this.
"Spike..." Twilight started, she didn't even know where to begin.
"How did you change your eye color?"
"...Contact lenses." He sheepishly admitted, popping one out for her to see.
"Oh, you know that's pretty cle-Wait a minute! What are you doing?!" Twilight caught herself, knocking away the contact.
"Well remember when Discord was released and threatened us all?"
"Don't remind me." She snarked.
"Well you told me that I was the new Rainbow Dash and I'm not going to fail you!"
Twilight facehoofed. "Spike, I didn't mean for you to take that seriously. It was spur of the moment and besides; we already have a Rainbow Dash; this Rainbow Dash!"
She levitated a picture of the eponymous Pegasus in front of the Dragon trying to be something he's not. But he simply swatted it away.
"Twilight, I never get to do anything with you guys. You always run off to be the hero and you leave me to tend to these dusty books." He pointed to the shelves. "So I'm going to take this seriously and there is nothing you can do to stop me."
"Nothing to stop you huh?" Twilight dryly replied. "Well as long as we have the real Rainbow Dash on the team." She emphasized 'Rainbow Dash' with two pokes to his chest. "You don't have the job."
Spike smiled smugly. "That's why I took the liberty of writing up a resignation form and sent it off to her." He watched the clock. "By now I should be getting a reply."
On cue, a ball of light began to glow in the center of the room, Twilight and Spike backing away so as to not be vaporized by its heat. The ball of light grew and expanded until it could have touched the ceiling and burst with a blinding light. When everypony could see again the two could make out the form of Princess Celestia, co-ruler of Equestria and Twilight's mentor."
"Princess Celestia?" Twilight asked in confusion. The Princess didn't say anything, she simply reached into the saddlebag she was carrying and levitated a scroll to Spike. He took it tentatively and read it aloud.
"For this deed to be done you are to stand trial alongside the Pegasus known as Rainbow Dash for custody of the Element of loyalty and the name Rainbow Dash itself."
"See you in court." The Princess said before disappearing in another flash of light.
Spike stared at the scorched ground where the Princess once stood. "What just happened?"
Twilight poked him in the chest again. "You got served!"
Finally, there was something to do today.
The scene at Canterlot Courthouse was one of uproar; news reporters, photographers and normal Pony folk lined the steps to the double doors. All of them wanting more answers to this insane case.
The Twenty percent Cooler case they called it.
Rainbow Dash, the true Element of loyalty walked up the steps into the courthouse with Twilight.
Well, Dash walked, Twilight staggered behind her.
"Don't worry, old chum." Twilight slurred her words. "With me by your side there's no way we'll lose(hic)."
"Uh, huh." Dash nodded, deterred by her usually calm and focused friend's antics. "Twilight, are you drunk?"
"Who? (hic) Me?" Twilight hiccupped. "I just stayed up all night studying Equestrian law and I was kinda really nervous so I maybe (hic) had a glass or (hic) five."
"Oh, no." Dash facehoofed."
"STOP YELLING AT ME!" Twilight wobbled off, suddenly in tears for no reason.
"No, wait! Twilight!"
Twilight did not get far as she slumped over onto the ground asleep.
Dash facehoofed again.
"OBJECTION!" Luna, co-ruler of Equestria and Princess of the night yelled, slamming her hooves on the table and pointing at the judges seat.
Which at the moment was empty.
"Oh right, we have not started yet why don't you tell me these things?" She sat down in her seat, Spike, now with removed paint, sat beside her. He was not happy that they had to go to trial but he did have Princess Luna by his side so maybe he could still win.
" 'Ello, Luna." Twilight slurred, being pushed to her seat by an impatient Rainbow Dash.
Luna gasped, covering her head. "No! Not her!"
"What?" Spike jumped up, surprised that the Princess of the night was cowering because of a drunken Twilight Sparkle.
"We have to go against Sisters student!" Luna squeaked, pointing at the other table where Dash and Twilight sat.
"Look at her; sitting there without a care in the world, that cheeky grin on her face." Luna muttered. "I bet she's planning her well thought out plan right now!"
"Are you putting whisky in your tea?" Rainbow Dash asked her new lawyer who was levitating a flask over her tea cup.
"No darling it's rum." She slurred.
"Oh me! My first loss and it will be to her!" She despaired.
"What loss?!" Spike grabbed her mane and shook her. "You can't lose!"
"Twilight always wins!"
Eventually the court was called to order; everypony had quieted down and was awaiting the judge.
It's okay Spike, calm down. The anxious Dragon told himself. It's not that bad, it's not like it could get any worse, can it?
The bailiff; a brownish earth Pony wearing a police uniform with an hourglass cutiemark stepped forward.
"This is brilliant." He grinned cheekily to himself. "I'm in the trial for the Element of loyalty! I've always wanted to see an Equestrian court; it's an awful lot like Gallifreyan court..."
"Ahem" A voice called out from behind him.
"Oh, yes! Right!" He cleared his throat. "All rise for your judge, the honorable tri-"
"AHEM." The voice called out again a little louder this time.
"Oh! Sorry, sorry. Uh Blah, blah, blah, rise for your judge, The Great and Powerful and hornorable Trixie!"
With a flourish of lights and smoke, the judge appeared in her seat, it was Trixie; she wore a black variant of her cape with the stars still on and she still wore her blue magicians hat nut over a curly judges wig.
She smiled. "Hey losers."
"TRIXIE?!" Everypony shouted in disbelief.
"Hey girl!" Trixie waved to Twilight.
"Hey baby!" Twilight hiccupped waving back.
"OBJECTION!" Luna shot up.
"*Beep*" Spike said.
OF PART 1!