The Book of Awesomeness

by Kimmo Rabies Pronger

Introduction

First of all, let me give my obligatory thank-yous out of the way. Wanna give thanks to my main mare Twilight Sparkle for getting me into books and giving me the rundown on how this writing stuff works, too. Also, she helped me through the publishing process of it, so that's another big thing. You are awesome! Thanks!

Great! So now, let's get to know each other, shall we? You have no doubt picked up this book because either...

A) You have heard about me (Who hasn't at this point?) and wished to know more about the fastest flier in all of Equestria.
B) You thought to yourself, "A book made by Rainbow Dash of all ponies? What is this?"
C) You know how awesome I am and wished to see my personal formula.
D) All of the above (Which is likely your pick.)

Whatever your choice, know that I'm honestly flattered that you decided to pick up my book but I'm not surprised. After all, this book is twenty-percent cooler than all the other books out there so it's only natural that ponies would wanna pick this book up to know me. I know because it says so on the cover page. Hee-hee!

Now wait a minute! Before you put that book down from what seems to be "arrogance", just know that you're not giving me a proper chance to explain myself to you.

First of all, I take pride in who I am. I am the Rainbow Dash and there's nopony else like me. That's a fact. I leave behind rainbow trails wherever I go so that you'll know that I passed by. That is also a fact. Then, there's the awesomeness that I possess. That's three indisputable facts so far about myself. I could say more, but we'll never get through the introductory chapter at this rate.

My goal when writing this book was to give ponies a better idea of how awesome that I am and know that I am not just a pony who brags about herself all the time or plays pranks on all her friends (Some even call me a bully to my friends, can you believe it?). I wanted to portray my own message to the ponies out there, and that's where you come in. Yes, you, the one who's standing or sitting there and leafing through these pages with a ton of questions in your head. I put out some...interesting clues on how to be awesome within this book but however you interpret it is up to you. If you take it the right way, you'll be awesome. If you take it the wrong way, then, I don't know what to say except that you don't know the meaning of awesome.

But there's one thing I want to make clear in this introductory chapter to you readers: You will never be as awesome as me, for there can only be ONE Rainbow Dash! You can be sure of that! This is an example of an interesting clue for you to take on how to be awesome as you read this totally awesome book that I have written (And that Twilight has proofread).

I hear some ponies out there how they say that I'm supposed to be the Element of Loyalty but I do stuff like play pranks on my friends and tease them. Sometimes, ponies try to tell me that I don't get what loyalty means! How sad. I get what loyalty is supposed to mean. Doing them favours when they need you, coming through when the time is critical, and being a hero when needed is okay, I guess. But that's a bit too mainstream and boring for me. I believe that loyalty is not just about being a hero. It's about staying you and showing them that you have your own meaning of the word loyalty. Like, I'd explain what I mean in greater detail but this is just the Introductory chapter, so, no. I won't tell you that just yet. Sorry!

You know a small but big example of how I'm loyal? I don't ever ask my friends to change who they are and what makes them my friends. Did I ever tell Twilight to put her books down forever and fly more? Nope. Did I ever ask Fluttershy to stop befriending animals and make "real" friends? Nada. Did I ever ask Applejack to stop being the hardheaded rival I've come to know and love? NO! See, when I show off my sense of loyalty, I want us to see it as our true selves with nothing to hide!

Which brings me to the next thing I want to tell you readers before we get into the bulk of this book: I don't make an attempt to hide how awesome I am! Where's the fun in just being reserved and humble all the time? It makes me want to create a thundercloud and scare ponies to spit out what's on their minds! You don't want to seem too brash but I don't think you should ever be so overly humble, either! Sheesh! Learn to take a compliment, ponies! (And I'm especially looking at you when I say that, Twilight!)

So, once again, I'd like to remind you that if you just can't handle how absolutely awesome I am, you should really put the book down, give it to somepony else, or even return it to whatever bookstore you got it from! I honestly don't care! I'm not here to focus on ponies who don't like me, I'm here to focus on the awesome ponies that do like me!

Once again, reader, have fun and I'll see you in the first chapter!

Comments

[mouch30]

Oh, this is such an interesting start! I absolutely love this idea.

You write Rainbow Dash very well, and I'm so excited to see the next chapter.

[Kimmo Rabies Pronger]

6927249

Thank you! I was afraid it wouldn't get past moderation due to the "manual" rule but thanks to some counseling from The Descendant, it gave me the courage to attempt to post this, and thankfully, it did. I agree with you. I think that it is one of my better ideas that I have. Humour is also my strong suit and with a personality like Rainbow Dash's, I thought that this idea would be fruitful.

I honestly didn't expect to hear you say that. I honestly thought I was off with her just a tad smudge but thank you so much! I'm glad you're looking forward to the next chapter!

[Rainbow87dash]

I'll just see where this goes, Don't mind me!

[Kimmo Rabies Pronger]

6928209

Heh. Alright then. :P