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Amit

Joined May 2012
396 followers

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Stories (14)

  • Twilight Discovers Literary Analysis
    Twilight reads a book about literature. It doesn't go well.

    5,944 words · 7,648 views · 921 likes · 21 dislikes
  • Judgement
    Lyra loves Bon-Bon very, very much. Enough to overlook the beautiful mare's caricatural homophobia.
    9,112 words · 10,172 views · 891 likes · 62 dislikes
  • Research
    Luna likes to conduct her own research.
    1,149 words · 1,392 views · 117 likes · 5 dislikes
  • Socks
    Luna puts on some socks. They make her think.
    1,325 words · 1,307 views · 103 likes · 6 dislikes
  • A Description of a Fountain in Canterlot's Gardens
    983 words · 1,041 views · 96 likes · 6 dislikes
  • Checkmate
    1,113 words · 1,718 views · 118 likes · 10 dislikes
  • Motionless
    2,044 words · 1,094 views · 108 likes · 10 dislikes
  • False Friends
    2,401 words · 2,157 views · 96 likes · 9 dislikes
  • Solace
    4,116 words · 1,317 views · 126 likes · 14 dislikes
  • Fifty Sheaves of Paper
    5,513 words · 2,492 views · 128 likes · 15 dislikes
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Lyra loves Bon-Bon very, very much.

Enough, in fact, to overlook the cream-coloured, beautiful-voiced, wondrous-smelling mare's raging, overwhelming, caricatural homophobia.

This would be the state of the union; Pinkie Pie, however, being as she is, thinks all this 'unrequited love' nonsense is nonsense for silly fillies and dusty old books, and as such decides to intervene.

Background PinkieDash.

omaigawd I got put on eqd

now with a reading

First Published
11th Jun 2012
Last Modified
21st Jun 2012

Comments ( 441 )

#1 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · 1 · 1 ·

I kind of hate Bon-Bon in this story... I mean what the hell happened since she hates them with so much passion? You just don't hate people, in this case ponies, without a reason. I wanna know :pinkiesad2:

#2 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · · ·

The premise has the potential to be pretty awesome. I'll be keeping an eye on this one.

#3 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · · 1 ·

>>729709

Sadly real life people hate eachother without reason as well, just look at the worlds homophobes.

Same basic premise I'm guessing. Stupidity and Ignorance leads them to hate things they don't understand.

#4 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · 2 · ·

>>729709 Ya know, it's funny. People say that love has no rhyme or reason to it, but then people also say 'you don't just hate people'. From an objective standpoint, what exactly is the difference? They're both emotions. If Love doesn't need a reason, neither does hate.

Not that I'm saying homophobia is cool, especially at this level, but meh.

Anywho, I've noticed you're maintaining the story in a present-tense, which is an interesting choice. I'm curious as to the name of the chapters as well.

#5 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · · ·

This premise is interesting; I'm definitely going to keep reading.

My only complaints are that the chapters are a little on the short side, and that BonBon is being a total bitch (but that's the entire point, of course).

#6 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · · ·

>>729709

Most hate is without reason, or is based on scapegoating. Most homophobes have never been harmed by a homo, same with racists and blacks or misogynists and women. Most of the time, the bigots never really even know a single member of the group they hate. It's what makes these things tragedies, for all parties.

#7 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · · ·

I said that this looked like it might be interesting, and I wasn't disappointed. I'll be keeping an eye out for updates on this one. You've got yourself a fav (I'd use an emoticon here but the school's laptop is being a bitch)

#8 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 2d ago · · ·

>>729840

The chapter titles are words from the Bible:

Katadikazete is "Judge not lest ye be judged", Aiteite is "Ask and ye shall receive".

The next chapter will be titled Lipsesthe: "Ask and ye shall receive."

(Highlighting 'shall receive' took quite a bit of research to find out exactly what the 'deponent' tense was.

For the benefit of others: the deponent is a passive verb that takes the form of an active. Ancient Greek can go buck itself up a tree.)

#9 · Chapter 1 · 115w, 2d ago · · ·

I love the idea of this!:pinkiehappy:

Please longer chapters, you've 'hook line and sinked' me as it were.

#10 · Chapter 3 · 115w, 1d ago · 2 · ·

I've always hated the overt breaking of the fourth wall people for some reason do with Pinkie Pie. It's never very funny and it really detracts from the story.

#11 · Chapter 3 · 115w, 1d ago · 2 · ·

>>730028

Here's a series of mundane explanations: Pinkie Pie's just bullshitting about the montage, she got in by walking in through the unlocked front door, she's a Ponyhammer 40k fan and she caught Lyra's accent. She acts like an idiot breaking the fourth wall so that no one will believe she can actually do things.

#12 · Chapter 1 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

This is a really interesting idea which I fear won't get the attention it deserves. There's a couple of points that go against it, such as it being in first person, the fact it portrays Bon-Bon as a homophobe and the short chapters but if people could get past that and give it a try I bet this story would develop quite nicely. I'll definitely keep reading and I'm saying that after just one chapter. Lyra's thought patterns are the best thing so far, she's so blinded by love.

#13 · Chapter 3 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

Interesting story, can't wait to see where it goes!

#14 · Chapter 2 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

Another good, albeit short, chapter. They're like little bite size snippets of a grander story, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. I can see why you've labeled it with a comedy tag, though I don't know if it's for the same reason I'm thinking. Bon-Bon's ignorance is just perfect, completely unaware that Lyra is lusting over her each time she gets close. One thing I think is a bit odd, however, is that Lyra just doesn't seem that phased about pretending she hates filly foolers along with Bon-Bon, she either loves her that much that it isn't an issue for her or you're missing a good plot point for internal conflict in Lyra's mind. Still looking good though, on to chapter 3!

#15 · Chapter 3 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

retracts her hand from my mouth <- hand?

#16 · Chapter 3 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

That was shorter than I expected, you've really pulled me into this. A bit more length to each chapter and I'd be completely happy with this fic. Not much happened in this for me to talk about but I do agree with Municiple Engines. I read your reply to their comment but it still comes across as fourth wall breaking and is getting pretty old; she doesn't even do it in the show THAT much but people still insist on doing it.

And now I'll give you a thumbs up and a favourite. Looking forwards to more.

#17 · Chapter 3 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

>>730081

Fixed. Thank you.

#18 · Chapter 1 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

This has potential. I'll be keeping an eye on it :trixieshiftright:

#19 · Chapter 4 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

that song....

but yeah, good story so far. I look forward to the next chapter :pinkiehappy:

#20 · Chapter 4 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

Stupid phone logged me out whilst writing the comment and I lost it. Oh well.

Another good chapter, good to see that we know have a reason as to why Bon-Bon's homophobic. Only thing you should watch out for is your occasional misuse of body part names. You had Bon Bon with her 'hand' on the door knob instead of her hoof.

Looks like I get first comment too, never had that before. (EDIT: or not... I always get beaten to it)

#21 · Chapter 1 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

This Is going to be one wonderfully operated shitstorm. You sir, Now have a favorite:moustache:

#22 · Chapter 4 · 115w, 1d ago · · ·

Hmm, Somehow I can just picture a Semi- Happy ending

Prediction: Lyra and Bon-Bon Get together, Bon-Bon Still Homophobic but she makes an exception with Lyra and Lyra Only.

Yep, The Shit is gonna hit the fan in this Fic Beautifully. :moustache::moustache::moustache:

#23 · Chapter 5 · 115w, 16h ago · · ·

I bet Lyra enjoys that Bonbon has become so possessive of her.

#24 · Chapter 5 · 115w, 15h ago · 2 · ·

Which is more insane:

The zealously obsessive paranoid bigot, or the mare crazy enough to fall in love with her?

#25 · Chapter 5 · 115w, 14h ago · 1 · ·
#26 · Chapter 5 · 115w, 12h ago · · ·

I've Said it once and I'll say it again,

This Shitstorm will be Excellent:moustache: Hmm yes, Quite

#27 · Chapter 5 · 115w, 5h ago · · ·
#28 · Chapter 5 · 115w, 4h ago · · ·

Ahh a good old love story, that brought the crazy sauce. Loving every second of it. Keep it up.

FF

#29 · Chapter 6 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

that tape is-

she would know.   She filmed it......

#30 · Chapter 4 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

fewmets

Dragon droppings, and you know the name for them. I am completely impressed. Also, this story is awesome.

#31 · Chapter 6 · 114w, 6d ago · 8 · ·

Sweet Celestia, Bon-Bon is so deep in the closet that she's in Narnia!

I am looking forward to a totally gay sunshine day at the end of this. This is delightful!

#32 · Chapter 6 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

I love this story... so... much... :pinkiehappy:

#33 · Chapter 6 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

Is it just me or does Lyra have a very severe submission fetish when being locked in by Bonbon sounds like a lovely idea to her?

#34 · Chapter 6 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

This is Quite possibly the best shipping fic I have ever read, You sure know how to make a shitstorm beautiful.:moustache:

#35 · Chapter 6 · 114w, 6d ago · 1 · ·

“Average local wage reasonable, no union, high cronyism, nepotism; non-Pegasus socially isolated ponies tend to be unemployed except by government services. Blank-flanks particularly useful. Variable costs easily covered. Optimal profits high. Firm will succeed.”

MORDIN! GET OUT OF THE FIC! :flutterrage:

#36 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 6d ago · 2 · ·

>>743999

I am the very model of a Canterlotian businesspony,

I've information on labour and the firm and externalities,

I know all kinds of market and and I quote the stocks historical,

My diversified investments range from urban to agrarian,

I am the very model of a Canterlotian businesspony.

&c, &c

#37 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

Excellent as always.

:pinkiegasp::pinkiegasp::pinkie gasp: Geeeeeeez, that's harsh for an ending...

#38 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

You know those scenes where you've got the character, with a pleasant expression on their face, and then something happens, and their expression doesn't change right away, but the background suddenly cracks like a mirror? That's what I imagined just happening.

#39 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

god damn the fucking cliff hangers AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! i going to go crazy till the next chapter come out!!!!!:pinkiecrazy: now i'm going to get Fluttershy to go crazy and kill you! just remember you did this, and that i put cliff hangers in my storys all of the time,:twilightsheepish:

#41 · Chapter 1 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

Ooooh! I like where this is going!

:pinkiehappy: More please! Like a hungry child, I want more!

#42 · Chapter 4 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

Ah. Progress. Like a baby first few steps. Gotta learn to walk before you run. My point being, that I like how you're doing small steps for Bon Bon. Its realistic.

Keep it up.

#43 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 6d ago · · ·

First, I adore your vocabulary.

Second... I am just waiting impatiently for the next chapter. You... are a tease.

#44 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 5d ago · · ·

The way you write... it's just amazing.

#45 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 5d ago · · ·

>>744171

I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite Salarian in the Citadel.

#46 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 5d ago · · ·

>>746280 Damn you, I wanted to write something like that. :rainbowwild:

#47 · Chapter 7 · 114w, 5d ago · · ·

The Shitstorm has hit And it was Beautiful.:moustache: Very good my friend

Very good indeed

#48 · Chapter 8 · 114w, 5d ago · · ·

All being said and done, however, it’s likely that I’ll write an alternate ending in a separate story in the near future. For those for you who demand the Pinkie Pie prophecy be fulfilled.

The chapter titles were the real fun I had in composing these. For this story, I used relevant words from the Bible; in context, they are:

Katadikazete: Luke 6:37, καὶ μὴ καταδικάζετε καὶ οὐ: And you will not be judged.

Aiteite: John 16:24: ἕως ἄρτι οὐκ ᾐτήσατε οὐδὲν ἐν τῷ ὀνόματί μου· αἰτεῖτε καὶ λήμψεσθε, ἵνα ἡ χαρὰ ὑμῶν ᾖ πεπληρωμένη: Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full.

Lipsesthe: John 16:24: ἕως ἄρτι οὐκ ᾐτήσατε οὐδὲν ἐν τῷ ὀνόματί μου· αἰτεῖτε καὶ λήμψεσθε, ἵνα ἡ χαρὰ ὑμῶν ᾖ πεπληρωμένη: Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full.

Plerosai: Matthew 5:17: Μὴ νομίσητε ὅτι ἦλθον καταλῦσαι τὸν νόμον ἢ τοὺς προφήτας· οὐκ ἦλθον καταλῦσαι ἀλλὰ πληρῶσαι: Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I have come not to destroy, but to fulfil.

Phylakes: Acts 12:6: ὅτε δὲ ἤμελλεν προαγαγεῖν αὐτὸν ὁ Ἡρῴδης, τῇ νυκτὶ ἐκείνῃ ἦν ὁ Πέτρος κοιμώμενος μεταξὺ δύο στρατιωτῶν δεδεμένος ἁλύσεσιν δυσίν, φύλακές τε πρὸ τῆς θύρας ἐτήρουν τὴν φυλακήν: And when Herod would have brought him forth, the same night Peter was sleeping between two soldiers, bound with two chains: and the keepers before the door kept the prison.

Esphalisanto: Matthew 27:66: οἱ δὲ πορευθέντες ἠσφαλίσαντο τὸν τάφον, σφραγίσαντες τὸν λίθον μετὰ τῆς κουστωδίας: So they went, and made sure the tomb, sealing the stone, and setting up a watch.

Eleutherosei: John 8:32: καὶ γνώσεσθε τὴν ἀλήθειαν, καὶ ἡ ἀλήθεια ἐλευθερώσει ὑμᾶς: And ye shall know the truth, and ye, the truth will set free.

Anastantes: Acts 23:9: ἐγένετο δὲ κραυγὴ μεγάλη, καὶ ἀναστάντες οἱ γραμματεῖς τοῦ μέρους τῶν Φαρισαίων διεμάχοντο λέγοντες· Οὐδὲν κακὸν εὑρίσκομεν ἐν τῷ ἀνθρώπῳ τούτῳ· εἰ δὲ πνεῦμα ἐλάλησεν αὐτῷ ἢ ἄγγελος, μὴ θεομαχῶμεν: And there was moreover a great clamour; and the scribes on the part of the Pharisees, having arisen, were striving, saying, 'No evil do we find in this man; and if a spirit spoke to him, or an angel, we may not fight against God.

The final sharing of words is translateable as 'I love you like a friend/and I wish you'd love me like a lover'.

I hope you've enjoyed this story as much as I've enjoyed writing it.

#49 · Chapter 8 · 114w, 5d ago · · ·

I would have loved for BonBon to return Lyra's feelings, but I guess that was a bit of an unrealistic expectation. Either way, the story was interesting and well written. Hope to see more awesome stories from you in the future.

#50 · Chapter 8 · 114w, 5d ago · · ·

how could you end it like that :fluttercry:

I don't like the ending. but I can respect it. :applejackunsure:

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