• Published 7th Jun 2012
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The Conversion Bureau: United We Stand - RK_Striker_JK_5



The TCB bites off more than it can chew as humans, Equestrians and Autobots roll out.

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Chapter Eleven

“Miss Sparkle, the President will see you now.”

At Agent Smith's voice, Twilight Sparkle looked up from datapad she was studying and blinked bleary eyes. She slowly slid off the couch and stretched, popping joints. “Ugh, thank you, Mister Smith.”

Agent Smith's head twitched as the other five ponies gathered around Twilight. Even in the early morning hour of three AM, he still wore his shades. “I apologize for the delay. President Abernathy has been in one long continuous meeting since his speech and the declaration of war on this so-called 'Neo-Equestria'.”

Applejack waved him off. “No need to apologize, partner. We all know how busy the President can get, 'specially in a time like this.”

Agent Smith nodded to her and led the six out of the dining room and down a flight of stairs. As they approached one of the doors that led to the White House's Situation Room, Twilight Sparkle held up a hoof. “Okay, before we go inside, please remember we'll be talking with some of the most powerful people on the planet, and they're dealing with a very tense situation. We don't need to make things worse by acting out or not taking this seriously. Does everyone understand?” At their nods and confirmations, Twilight Sparkle looked up to Agent Smith. “Please show us in.”

The door opened and they were led in. The interior was rather crowded; some Twilight Sparkle recognized, others not so. She immediately picked out President Abernathy sitting at the head of the table, head bowed as he conversed with Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Tim Hollingsworth. Secretary of State Phillip Provost stood by a chair. Chip Chase and Albert Preston were near one of the wall-mounted monitors, quietly talking amongst themselves. General William Lennox, the head of the EDC, was talking rapidly on a cell phone and gesticulating wildly.

Clayton abruptly stood up and looked to Lennox. “Are you absolutely sure about that, Will? They're being treated with the utmost caution?”

Lennox looked up from his cell phone and nodded to the President. “Yes, definitely. The prisoner's pulled through and the vials are under maximum security at Autobot City. Although considering Wheeljack's penchant for insanity...”

Hollingsworth rubbed his forehead. “Just make sure he doesn't accidentally turn the entire organic population into ponies, all right?” He stood up and turned to Clayton. “As I was saying, French, Russian and British cargo planes landed an hour ago.”

Clayton nodded, grimacing slightly. “The chain of command is going to be interesting, to say the least.” He looked down at Twilight Sparkle and pointed at her. “Oh, thank god!” He waved around at everyone. “Folks, this is Twilight Sparkle, personal student of Princess Celestia and probably the foremost expert on magic here.” He looked to his left. “No offense, Albert.”

Albert shook his head. “None taken.”

Twilight Sparkle straightened up and smiled. “Why thank you, Mister President.” She floated her datapad up and flipped it around so the screen faced the room's occupants. “Now, I have an–”

“We've had some new developments, Miss Sparkle. We need you to go to Autobot City in order to study some captured potion, and perhaps recreate the sonic teleboom that reconnected our worlds.”

Hollingsworth spoke up. “We figure our best bet are the Elements of Harmony and Equestria itself, and our only way there is currently unavailable. You and Rainbow Dash are our best bets to get an alternate opening to Equestria, even if it's temporary.”

“–idea to possibly – wait, what?” Twilight Sparkle stopped at Clayton's words. “You... really? That's great!” She tucked the datapad into one of her saddlebags. “That's just what I was going to propose!” She stopped and rubbed her chin. “Well, except about the 'potion' bit. Wait, potion?”

Rarity rubbed her chin. “Pardon me, Mister President, but this potion you refer to. Is this vile brew what this false Celestia is intending to use to turn humans into ponies?”

Clayton nodded, his mouth a thin line. “More like intended, Rarity. She's already used it on several citizens of this country. Right now they're in that Neo-Equestria and god knows what's happened to them.” He clenched his fist and slammed it into the table, rattling everything on it.

Hollingsworth leaned in close to his old friend. He placed a hand on Clayton's shoulder and gently squeezed. “Easy there, Clayton. We'll get them back.”

Rainbow Dash scowled. “Mister President, sir?” As everyone looked to her, sweat formed on her brow and her cheeks blushed. “I... I've never been able to do a sonic rainboom willingly. What I mean is, the two times I've done it, I wasn't consciously trying to do it. I just... did it. But you need me to do another one, right?” At their nods, the scowl fell away. “Well, then, Mister President, consider it done!” At that, she rose to her hind legs and did her best salute.

The President smiled and returned Rainbow Dash's salute. “Thank you, Miss Dash.” He looked to Lennox. “Will, how's Operation: Exodus going?”

Lennox turned to the largest monitor at the far end of the room. It currently displayed a map of Earth. He pointed to several circles. “Well, all space bridges are on hot standby. We've contacted the colonies, Nebulon, Cybertron and other allied planets. They're ready to receive if the worst happens.”

Twilight's ears folded flat against her skull. “Wait, you have a plan to evacuate Earth?”

Lennox shrugged. “Well, yeah? That's news to you?”

Clayton let out a sigh. His eyes lost focus for a moment. “We had two near extinction-level events happen within a year when the Decepticons first woke up. And they weren't the last.” He pointed to the map. “We have twenty-one of the first-generation space bridges at key locations around the globe. They're not exactly pretty, but they can move large quantities of people off the planet relatively safely.”

The six ponies there stared up at Clayton in open-mouthed shock. Pinkie Pie finally shook her head, her mane flattened slightly and duller than normal. “I... really wish I had something to say to break the tension or make some of you laugh right now. Or maybe some cupcakes or confetti, but I got nothing right now.”

Clayton held up a hand. “Appreciate the thought, Pinkie.” He waved to Chip and Albert. “Misters Preston and Chase will be accompanying you back to Autobot City. I believe you know Mister Chase already, Twilight.”

Twilight walked up to Chip and nodded to him. “I kinda wish the circumstances were different, Chip, but it's good to see you again.”

Agent Smith's head suddenly shot up. He touched a finger to his earpiece. “Confirmed? Contain and call in reinforcements.” He walked over to Clayton and Hollingsworth, two other agents joining him. “Mister President, General, there's just been an incursion just outside the Oval Office in the Rose Garden.”

Clayton's head whipped back and forth as he was surrounded by the Secret Service. “Wait, what? Smith, who's out there?” He slid a drawer on the table open, pulled out a laser pistol and two energy packs, and slid a pack into the pistol's handle. With the flick of a switch, the laser thrummed to life.

Agent Smith nodded as he and others surrounded the people inside. “We have snipers on the roof and soldiers moving in, but it appears they're protected by a force field.” He continued nodding. “Yes, yes. Hold your fire for the moment.”

Twilight opened her mouth, but stopped and whipped her head to the left. She slowly walked forward, up to the window. “That... no. It can't be!”

The other ponies exchanged looks of confusion. Rainbow Dash flew over to Twilight and dropped down beside her. “Twilight, no offense, but you're kind of freaking us out.”

A voice echoed through the room, startling everyone inside. “Hey, is this on? They can hear us, right? Okay, good. Attention, humans! We wanna speak to the ponies inside. And no shooting, either.”

Rainbow Dash's jaw worked around for almost a minute before she finally spoke. “Was that... me? That was my voice!” She grabbed Twilight Sparkle's head and turned it around. “Twilight, what the hay's going on outside?”

Twilight Sparkle leaned back and wrenched it free of Rainbow Dash's grip. “Dash, outside is, well, it's us!” She turned as the other ponies slowly walked over to her and Rainbow Dash. “Outside, my magic, or something that is very close to it, is there. I can even feel the Elements of Harmony!”

Clayton growled. “Great, so we've got some fairly powerful ponies out there with the damned Elements of Harmony.” He glanced to the ceiling. “Does the rainbow come in through the window, or does it bypass roofs?”

Dash's voice echoed again. “Hey, we're not gonna blast you with the Elements of Harmony, okay? We just wanna talk with the other versions of us.” She paused for a moment. “We're under a... flag of truce. We're envoys.”

Hollingsworth rubbed the bridge of his nose. “So much for privacy.”

Twilight Sparkle's horn glowed and the walls all began shimmering slightly. “Okay, that should stop them from listening in, for now.” She looked around. “So, you folks probably have a bit more experience in situations like this. How do we proceed?”

Clayton pointed to the monitor. “Get a feed from the cameras outside. Let's see what they're packing.” A minute passed before the main monitor changed from the map of Earth to an exterior view of the White House. Six ponies, identical to the ones inside the Situation Room, stood in a loose circle on the lawn of the White House. A shimmering sphere of violet energy emanated from their Twilight's horn, surrounding them. Bright-red dots flickered on and off the force field, while the light from several searchlights could be seen illuminating them.

Clayton walked up to the monitor. “If I remember, this uses Cybertronian imaging technology. Magnify and enhance.” The image zoomed in on the ponies. “Ah, excellent.” He squinted at the image. “General Lennox, can you confirm the ponies are not wearing saddlebags?”

Lennox leaned in close to the image, even as others in the room drew close. “Unless they've got subspace pockets, looks like they didn't plan that far ahead.”

Rainbow Dash flew up and over to the screen. She craned her neck in close and squinted her eyes. “Say, is it just me, or does their Twilight Sparkle look really tired?”

Hollingsworth cleared his throat. “If we could see the image, Miss Dash, we could confirm your observation.” He half-smiled when she floated back. “Thank you.”

Twilight Sparkle's mouth slowly turned up as she observed her counterpart. She trotted over, hopped onto a chair and examined the image. “Oh, yes!” She hopped out of the chair and danced around a bit. “Yes, yes yes yes yes–”

“Twilight, control yourself!” Clayton thundered.

Twilight Sparkle froze in mid-hop. She shrank down into herself and her cheeks turned beet-red. “S-sorry, Mister President.”

Rainbow Dash snorted. “And you told us not to embarrass ourselves?”

Twilight Sparkle glared at Rainbow Dash for an instant before clearing her throat. “Whenever I teleport across the Rainbow Bridge, it drains me, physically and magically. I need time to recover, and usually a long nap. Tell me, does anyone think she's taken the time to recover?”

Applejack rubbed her chin. “If she's anything like you, Twilight, I'd bet Sweet Apple Acres' crop she hasn't. No offense.”

Twilight Sparkle waved her off. “None taken. We still have to be cautious, though, if we go out and talk with them. They do have the Elements of Harmony, and they don't require outside magic to work.”

Clayton sighed. “Miss Sparkle, I'm hesitant to ask you to go outside and talk with them. The last time they tried diplomacy, one of my best agents was turned into a pony, brainwashed and captured.”

Fluttershy swallowed. “W-well, thank you, Mister President, but we know you need information from them, right? Well, if that's the case, and they're not going to talk to you, then we have to go and meet with them.”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “It's settled, then.” She rose up onto her hind legs and boxed the air. “And if these losers try anything, we'll buck 'em all the way to Mars!”

Clayton half-smiled. “You remind me of half the Joes, Miss Dash.” He walked over to Twilight Sparkle and slowly knelt down. “Miss Sparkle, whenever you're ready, let's go.”

Agent Smith rubbed his forehead. “Mister President, is is highly inadvisable for you to go up there. Last time was a special circumstance. This time, there's no need for you to confront them.”

Clayton looked up at Agent Smith, his eyes narrow. “Smith, I am not going to hide in my own house. They're threatening the country I swore to defend as a soldier and President.” He held up his hand as others started protesting. “My mind's made up, people!” He jabbed a finger at Hollingsworth, even as his old friend walked over. “Stay down here, Tim. For backup, okay?”

Hollingsworth growled. “All right, Mister President, although for the record I think this is a bad idea. Smith, head up with him.”

Agent Smith' nodded. He tugged on his lapels and dropped down to one knee besides Twilight Sparkle and Clayton. “By your leave, Miss Sparkle.”

Twilight Sparkle half-closed her eyes. The sound shield around the Situation Room disappeared. She cleared her throat. “Okay, listen up! We're coming up, with Agent Smith and President Abernathy. If you try anything, it's not going to go well for you. Understood?”

There was silence for a moment before Dash's voice echoed through the room once more. “Ugh, all right, but the human stays silent.”

Agent Smith shrugged. “Afraid of dissenting opinion or other experiences. The sign of a closed mind, Miss.”

Clayton nodded. “Besides, this country has freedom of speech. And you're not shutting us up.”

“Yeah... right....”

The other ponies gathered around Twilight Sparkle, Agent Smith, and President Abernathy. Her horn flared to life and all eight were enveloped in a flash of light. When it faded, they were gone.


The horizon was a fiery orange in this pre-dawn hour. Dash looked up at the humans standing on the roof, pointing their weapons down at them. She stuck her tongue out at them and waggled her head back and forth. “Nah, nah, can't hit me!”

AJ rolled her eyes. She cantered over to Dash and whacked her on the back of the head. “For Celestia's sake, Dash, you're embarrassin' us!”

Dash stumbled a bit, almost colliding with the inner surface of Twilight's force field. She turned and butted foreheads with AJ, pushing her back. “Hey, watch it!”

Any further argument was stopped as their counterparts, Agent Smith and President Abernathy appeared in front of them. Dash spun about and her wings spread wide. “About time!”

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Sure, whatever. So, what do you want?”

Flutters stepped forward, grinning. “Hello, it's nice to see you six in person. We've been wondering what you're doing among the humans, and why you seem to be opposing our helping them. We just want what's best for the poor dears.”

Rainbow Dash blinked twice. She looked around before waving a wing at Flutters and stepping back. “Ooo-kay, anyone else wanna tackle this?”

Twilight Sparkle cleared her throat and waved a hoof up in the air. “It's very simple. You're not helping them. You've already destroyed their property with that barrier, sent hundreds of people fleeing for their lives and have turned people into ponies against their will. How in any way, shape or form is that 'helping them'?”

Rares rolled her eyes. “Oh please, darling! Those newfoals–”

“People changed against their will and brainwashed, Miss,” Clayton said, glowering. “One of them is a friend of mine. His name is Roger Jefferson. You attacked him while under a flag of truce. There's also the crews of three artillery positions. Others were transformed as well. Do not use pretty words or euphemisms for your crimes.”

Rares scoffed and thrust her nose into the air. “Typical human bluster. We had quite a bit of that rudeness and ill-mannered behavior on the first Earth we saved. Fortunately enough saw the light to help us help them. A shame we neglected to bring potion, President Abernathy. It'd do well to improve your disposition!”

Twilight Sparkle stared at Rares for a moment. “I don't know what to say.”

A bark of laughter came from Dash and she thrust a hoof into the air. “Ha, all right! You're seeing the light, right?”

Twilight Sparkle shook her head. "No. I'm just not sure what arguments can be made to get through those thick skulls of yours that what you're doing isn't helpful! It's hurtful, horrible, and against everything those Elements you're wearing represent!"

At that, Twilight's eyes gained focus. "No, you're wrong! Queen Celestia is risking so much to help the humans rise above themselves, to better their lot in life." She took a tentative step forward, eyes focused on Twilight Sparkle. "Look at their wars, their violence, their hatred and destruction. You can't honestly tell me they wouldn't be better off as ponies!"

Clayton held up a hand. "Twilight, my Twilight, may I respond?" At her nod he stepped forward. "As I said in my address, humanity has done evil in the past, the present and undoubtedly the future. To deny or downplay that would be a lie. We have, also, done much good in the past, present and future. To deny or downplay that would be a lie as well. No, we are not perfect. We've struggled and will continue to struggle with our inner demons. All sapient species we've encountered so far do that." He paused for a moment. "Even ponies."

Twilight snickered and snorted. "Oh, that's rich!"

Twilight Sparkle shrugged. "Well, it's true. Ponies aren't perfect, not by a long shot. The things I've read what Queen Majesty did curled my hooves. Ponder that for a moment. Hay, I've had moments of anger, jealousy and outright hate on more than one occasion. You can't condemn humans for their negative emotions without condemning pretty much every sapient species out there for the same exact thing."

Rares rolled her eyes and stuck her nose into the air. "Oh please, my dear. I'm sure whatever things Queen Majesty did are minuscule compared to what humans have done."

Rainbow Dash's head tilted back in laughter. She clutched her sides and rolled about in midair. "Oh, Wow! That’s a good one!" She finally stopped, wiped her eyes and focused on Rares. "Listen, I don't know much about Majesty, but what the Princess Ponies told me about her and what I've read? She was crazy! A grade-A psychopath!"

Twilight Sparkle blinked and looked up at Rainbow Dash. "Wow, Dash. I never knew you were into history."

Rainbow Dash waved her off. "Eh, don't get me wrong. I'm not much into all that egghead stuff. It was just one conversation, but what a conversation! Some of the things she did was just nuts."

Rares swallowed. "W-w-well, fine! One pony out of–"

"There's also Commander Hurricane, Princess Platinum and Chancellor Puddinghead of the Sky Clans of the Peak, the Mages of the Rock, and the Ponies of the Plains, respectively," Twilight Sparkle said. "Tales of their war-making and general insanity abound in historical literature and eyewitness accounts. The things the Princess Ponies told me?" She shook her head. "By the Herd, they were insane! If you think Queen Majesty was the only one like that, then maybe you should've paid more attention in class."

"Yes, they were insane." The admission surprised everyone on both sides, causing them to stare at Twilight. "But what did the human say? 'Past, present, and undoubtedly the future'? Didn't you agree with him saying that the same was true of your Equestria? So sure, we have the same brutal history, but what about our earth now? War is gone; crime nearly so. When we found humanity, twenty-five thousand of them were starving to death every night because of petty wars that destroyed crops and tore families apart while the rest of them watched, debating the morality of helping!"

Applejack shot back. "You’re lyin'!"

"She ain't, and that's the honest truth!" AJ responded, with just as much conviction.

"Go ahead, Twilight Sparkle," Twilight resumed in a sickeningly sweet voice of contempt. "Ask your president how many humans have starved to death since we started this mission. How many of his 'fellow citizens' were murdered last night. How many have died in fighting since their 'War to End All Wars'. On our Equestria; on our Earth, the answer's easy: none. We're not the ones that should have paid more attention in class."

Pinkie Pie piped up and waved a hoof in the air, grinning from ear to ear. "Ooh, ooh! If you're gonna condemn all of humanity like this, better save some potion for Transformers, Nebulons, dragons and Herd knows who else." her smile fell away and her eyes narrowed. "Wouldn't be 'fair' to not invite them to this party!"

Applejack tapped a hoof on the ground. "Hay, now that I think 'bout it, how are you even feedin' all of them? You took in seven billion humans from that other Earth, and now seven billion more, or however many you manage to convert? That's nuts!"

Flutters stepped forward. "Oh, well, when Kindness overcomes greed, hate, and fear, anything is possible. When ponies care about Harmony, everypony takes care of everypony else."

"And that way, everypony can have great parties instead of having to be sad!"

"When you're loyal to everypony, you don't let anypony go without."

"Friends wouldn't keep the blessings of Harmony to themselves."

"So you see, my dears, you don't have to struggle anymore. We're here to help."

"And we really do want what's best for you, even if you can't see it yet." AJ finished for the group.

Twilight Sparkle slapped a hoof to her forehead and dragged it down her face. "I can see we're not gonna get through to you. This was a waste of time."

Twilight growled a bared her teeth. "Something we agree on. It's quite obvious humanity has contaminated you and your Equestria as well. It seems we have no choice but to head back and make our report." She shook her head. "A shame we didn't bring any potion with us."

Dash flew up and kicked the air right in front of Twilight's force field. "Oh, I don't think we need any potion to beat the humans."

Rainbow Dash snarled and jabbed a hoof at her. "Oh, yeah? Why don't you come over here and try that, you cheap knockoff? I'll kick you so hard you'll fly past Pluto!"

Clayton threw an arm up in front of Rainbow Dash. “Don't bother, Miss Dash. As for you six, since this time you haven't broken the flag of truce you're under, I am going to let you retreat. This time.”

Twilight chuckled. “Oh, like you could even stop us? My force field is–”She suddenly groaned and stumbled forward. Her horn sputtered and the shiny hemisphere surrounding her and her friends vanished.

Flutters swallowed and her cheeks paled. “Oh, my...”

Rares and AJ caught Twilight before she fell face-first into the grass. AJ slid her hat off and waved it frantically in front of Twilight.

Clayton crossed his arms. “Overexert yourself, Miss Sparkle?” He turned to Agent Smith. “Mister Smith, could you let–”

Agent Smith pushed Clayton back and held his laser pistol up. He aimed it at Dash as she flew forward. The lenses of his glasses lit up as he aimed, calmly squeezed the trigger, and fired a thin, blue beam at the charging pegasus. It sliced through part of her left wing, burning through feathers and skin and leaving a long, nasty slice along the appendage.

Dash cried out in pain and corkscrewed to her left. She crashed into the ground, managing to tuck her wings in close to her body before impacting and rolling along. She stumbled to her hooves, her wing close to her body. “Ow, ow! That hurt! Gyah, bucking horse apples!”

Rares' eyes widened. “Rainbow Dash, you ruffian!” She gasped as she noticed red dots appearing on her white coat. “Oh, my stars!”

Members of the Park Police and Secret Service rushed out, sidearms drawn and aimed at the Neo-Equestrians. Twilight's eyes gained focus and she looked around. She sucked in a breath and closed her eyes. Her horn sparked and sputtered, finally igniting. Her group and Dash were surrounded by a violet light as she drew upon her last bits of energy to teleport them away.

Clayton clenched his fists as they escaped. “Well, forget flag of truce. From now on, shoot on sight.” He turned to Agent Smith. “Good eye.”

Agent Smith slowly nodded as he holstered his pistol once more. “Thank you, Mister President. Although from now on, I must insist on you refraining from meeting with the enemy. For your own safety, of course.”

Clayton held up a hand, but waved Agent Smith off. “Just put out an APB on them, and contact the command post at the barrier. Let them know about this.” He dropped down to one knee besides a shaky Twilight Sparkle. “Are you all right?”

Twilight Sparkle slowly shook her head. “I... I don't think so, Sir. Talking to them was like butting my head against a concrete wall.” She locked eyes with him. “They kept on insisting they were right, despite evidence to the contrary or any questions we raised. I don't get it. Even with the Pinkie Sense, I acknowledged it existing.”

Clayton sighed. He slowly reached out and patted Twilight Sparkle on the shoulder. “Those who truly believe in the cause are those hardest to convince otherwise, despite evidence to the contrary. I've seen it before. If it makes you feel any better, they probably think the same about us.”

Rainbow Dash shook a hoof and let out a strangled grunt. “Wait until next time, you diamond dog! I'll wreck you so bad!”

Applejack looked up at her. “Easy there, sugarcube. Save that energy for next time.”

Rainbow Dash bared her teeth. “This time should've been 'next time', Applejack. Next time, she's not getting away. None of them are.”


The sun rose over Canterlot, but Danielle paid it no mind. She was curled up on a couch, a blanket over her. Muffled snores could be heard as she occasionally kicked and turned in her sleep.

In front, Trixie and the Doctor stood facing each other, Danielle's smartphone hovering between the pair. The back panel was off and the Doctor waved his sonic screwdriver over the internal circuitry. “There we go.” He flipped the screwdriver off and motioned to Trixie. “All set, my dear. Now Danielle should be able to call home, even through the barrier.”

Trixie floated the back cover over and reattached it to the phone. “Let's hope you're right, Doctor. Not that I don't trust you, but phones are complicated pieces of work. It took me four tries to successfully use my theater's phone the first time, and that's an old-style wall unit!”

The Doctor grinned. “Well, that's a bit humble from you, Trixie.”

“You could stand to learn a thing or three about humility, my dear Doctor.”

Any rejoinder was cut off when the main doors opened and Megan and Celestia walked in, an ornately-decorated chest floating behind them. Both looked far less haggard than even a few hours ago. Megan walked over to Danielle and leaned over her. She held up a foreleg and looked it over, then looked to Danielle. “I can't stay like this.”

Trixie slowly turned and walked over to Megan's side. She swallowed before speaking. “B-begging your pardon, Mag–I mean Megan, but is being a pony really all that bad?” She stepped back as Megan swung her head around to look at her. “N-not that I-I'm saying you're wrong, mind you! If you want to become human again, I meant there's n-n-no reason why not!”

Megan sighed. “That's one reason right there, Trixie. Just walking from the throne room to get the Elements and back here, I had just about everyone bowing to me and scraping. Even Shiny and Fancy Pants were trying their best to not look like they were doing it while their horns were scrapping the tiling.”

Trixie shook her head. “Even I, Trixie, would find such adulation and treatment overwhelming. For you, almost the Element of Humbleness?”

Megan half-smiled, her eyes somewhat dull. “Even without all the bowing, this wasn't some accident or benevolent change.” Her eyes narrowed, her mane and tail whipped out and the gossamer sections of her wings began to glow. “If it was something like that, then fine! But oh, no! Some messed-up version of Celestia accused me and my entire species of being beyond help and forced me to guzzle down an entire vial of that damned potion. I've got her in my head chattering away like the next-door neighbors at the best of times, and at the worst she's in almost total control of me. And the worst thing is? I can't even control my MAGIC!”

The last word thundered in the room, shaking the furniture and sending more than one picture frame to the floor. Danielle shot to a sitting position, blinking rapidly. “I'm awake, I'm awake!” She looked up at Megan. “Oh, damn. I was still hoping it was all a bad dream.” She reached up and patted Megan's face. “Morning, Mom.”

Megan hung her head. “Good morning, Danielle. Sorry for waking you.”

Celestia walked up to Megan's side. “Well, it's not all bad, Megan. Sure, your magic is a bit powerful, but you can be trained.” She motioned to the window and the sunny day outside. “I have first-hoof experience with that.” She winked.

Megan grimaced. “I don't care if they can or not, Celestia. This isn't me. I'm a human being, not an alicorn or pony. I can't stay like this. What about Michelle, or Mike? How would they handle it if I can't be changed back?”

Danielle shrugged. “Knowing Dad, he'll adjust. Knowing Michelle, she'll grab a dozen brushes and rollers and do your mane and tail up all pretty and fancy.” She held up a hand as Megan started speaking. “Mom, Mom! Come on, we'll get through this. You know it's not gonna matter to Dad if you remain an alicorn or not.”

Megan sighed. “I don't know, Danielle. I mean there are some... things that–”

Danielle placed her hands over her ears and shot to her feet. “Lalala, not listening to that line of conversation!” She ran away from Megan and Celestia, quickly crossing to the other side of the room. She looked over. “Is it dropped? It's dropped, right? Right.”

Celestia bit her lip, but her cheeks still bulged out. Megan shot her a look, but finally nodded. “Okay, sorry about that. It's dropped.” She looked to Celestia. “Do you have any idea about some magic that can turn me back into a human?”

Celestia glanced away, eyebrows furrowed. “Off the top of my horn, possibly. We have transmutation magic, certainly, but we're not entirely sure how you've been changed. Without proper study, it would be exceedingly dangerous.”

The Doctor and Trixie walked over. “Well, I do have some good news.” He stepped aside as Trixie floated Danielle's phone up. “If my work is right, and it usually is, this phone can now call up Earth, barrier or no. The only question is, who should we–”

Danielle dashed over and plucked the phone from midair. “Thanks, Doc!” she said as her fingers danced across the screen. After a few seconds, she held it out as a dial-tone could be heard. “Come on, come on...”

The other end picked up and a somewhat groggy Mike could be heard over the speaker. “Hello? Danielle, is that you? Danielle!”

Danielle swallowed, and she began crying. “I-I'm here, Dad. I'm all right.” She looked up as Megan slowly walked over. “And there's someone else here who wants to talk to you.”

“Megan?”

Megan shuddered. “Hi, Mike. I am so glad to hear you. I just...” She wiped her eyes with a wing. “I'm just glad to hear you.”

There was silence for nearly a minute before Mike spoke again, his voice gruffer than usual. “I'm glad to hear you, too, honey. I was just so worried and scared. Wait, Michelle's right here!”

There was a slight shuffling sound before, “Mommy? Are you there?”

Megan gasped. “I'm right here, Michelle! Danielle and I are right here. We're okay!” She looked to the Doctor and Trixie. “Thank you so much. I just... thank you.”

Trixie bowed her head and swept her hat off her head. The Doctor merely grinned.

Megan turned back to the phone. “Mike, how are Danny and Molly? Have you heard from them? And where are you and Michelle?”

“Well, big sis, we're right here in Autobot City,” Danny said. “They picked up Molly and I yesterday, and it's been one damned thing after another.” There was a pause. “So are you really an alicorn? And is it really you? Quick, what was the name of my freshman year crush?”

Megan's head drooped. “Shelby Smith, Danny. Although how on Earth you fell for that psycho is still beyond me. And yeah, Danny. I really am, at least for the moment.”

“Okay, it's you.”

There was the sound of shuffling and rustling over the connection before Molly's voice came over. “There's about a thousand jokes I could say right now,but I'll save them for after we get you back, save Earth and possibly Equestria at the same time. Wait, is she here? Okay. Megan? There's someone from the Earth Defense Command here. Mike called her up.” She paused. “I didn't mean it like that, I swear!”

Another voice came over. “Missus Richards? My name is Lieutenant Commander Marie Hernandez of the Earth Defense Command. What is your current situation? Is there anyone from the government or military nearby?”

Celestia spoke up, her voice harder than normal. “Commander, this is Princess Celestia. What is Earth's current situation?”

Marie filled them in on the barrier, Queen Celestia's stated plans, the pegasus raids, the Autobot assistance, and the alternate Bearers showing up at the White House, among other things. “Miss Sparkle and the others should be here in a few hours. She and Rainbow Dash will attempt to sonic teleboom back to your Equestria, but not before studying those captured samples of potion. After that, though, we're not sure. We need to get that barrier down, and right now the only thing we can think of to use are the Elements of Harmony.”

Megan spoke up. “Queen... nutjob is in control of the barrier and powering it by mainlining her version of the Heart of Ponyland. Take her out, and it should fall.” She sucked in a breath. “I can teleport between realities, but if I go there, there's no way in hell I'll be able to resist her.” She waved Celestia off. “It's not a question of willpower, Celestia! I go there, I'm her meat puppet. I barely snapped out of it, and it took threatening my family to do that!”

Celestia stared at Megan before bowing her head. “I'm sorry, Megan.” Her head rose. “Is there any chance you could show Luna or I how to do that?”

Megan slowly smiled. “Yeah, I can do that just fine, Celestia.”

Celestia's horn glowed and a quill and parchment floated over from her desk. She wrote rather quickly on the parchment before rolling it up and floating it over to Trixie. “Trixie, please teleport down to Luna's bedroom. This will get you past the guards.”

Trixie took hold of the rolled-up parchment with her magic. “I'll be back quicker than a sonic rainboom!” Her horn glowed and her face scrunched up. With a flash of light, she was gone.

Danielle spoke up. “Okay, if that... genocide-lestia or whatever the hell we're gonna call her is channeling the damned Heart of Ponyland itself, are the Elements really gonna be enough to stop her? That thing's got almost infinite power!”

Celestia's eyes shifted back and forth in thought. “Commander... you said Optimus Prime was flying in, correct?” At Marie's confirmation, she smiled. “I think we've got our trump card, then.”

Silence reigned for a moment before Danielle snapped her fingers. “The Matrix of Leadership! That thing blew Unicron up in 2005, lord knows what it would do with the Elements!”

Celestia nodded to her. “Excellent thinking, Danielle. Commander, what about it?”

“I... think it might be a good idea for me to get General Lennox or General Hollingsworth in on this end, Princess. They can make these decisions a little better than I can. Although I will say your plan has merit. Right now, it's all we've got.”

Trixie reappeared and bowed to Celestia and Megan. “Princess Luna shall be along shortly. She said she had to go and collect–” Luna suddenly teleported in, with Spanish Steel, Fancy Pants and Shining Armor lined up right beside her. “Well, never mind.”

Fancy Pants blinked and his monocle swiveled about. “Hmm, perhaps we should begin holding Senate meetings here, your majesty?”

Luna walked forward and swung around to face the three stallions. “General, ready the Steel Hooves at Fort Bulwark, along with the American tank crew.” She looked to Megan. “As you strike Celestia, we shall also strike their military.”

Shining Armor slowly approached Celestia. “Your highness, any word on Princess Cadance?”

Celestia's eyes lifted. “Why don't you ask her yourself, Captain?”

Everyone turned as Princess Cadance flew down from the sky towards the room's balcony. She touched down and trotted inside. Her coat was dirty, and her legs wobbly, but her eyes were sharp. She dropped to one knee and bowed her head. “Everyone, may I present the leader of the Eastern Dragon Clan, Mei Long the Wise!”

A shadow fell across the window as Mei Long hovered close in, her serpentine body scrunched up as much as possible. Her eyes narrowed, then shot wide. “By Draco himself! Megan, what has happened to you?”

Everyone slowly looked to Megan, who swallowed and blushed. “Well...” She quickly filled Mei Long in on the events that had transpired.

With every word, Mei Long's expression and posture changed. Her eyes narrowed. Smoke streamed from her nostrils. Her claws clenched tightly, and her tail thrashed in the air, sending gale-force winds about. “Megan, please come here. There is a test I must perform on you.”

Megan trotted to the balcony. She flapped her wings and was airborne. She drifted close to Mei Long's face. Mei Long inhaled, then exhaled smoke. A large gray cloud gathered around Megan. Two pencil-thin beams of red light appeared in the cloud's haze, one emanating from Megan's head and the other from her torso.

Danielle pointed at the beams of light. “Mei Long, what the hell are those?”

Megan twisted about in the air, eyes finally landing on the beams. She gasped and her wings flapped, dispelling the cloud. She spun around to face Mei Long. “Well?”

Mei Long shook her head. “They represent the strings this false Celestia is using to control you, Megan. Here in Equestria, her influence is minimal. On Earth or, Draco forbid, her own Neo-Equestria, those strings would be the thickness of tree trunks. But even here, she exerts influence. We must change you back to human, the sooner the better.”

Megan swallowed. “Okay, so what do we do about them?” She turned to face the balcony and those gathered below. “Any ideas down there?”

Celestia bit her lip and furrowed her brow. “The Elements are useless without their Bearers.” She looked to the cell phone. “Commander Hernandez, how long before Twilight and the others arrive?”

“Probably three hours, Princess, and I doubt they'd be able to teleboom over immediately.”

Celestia nickered. “Drat!”

Luna spoke up. “Sister, if the Elements cannot be used, perhaps something else that is just as powerful as the Elements, if not more? Perhaps the Heart of Ponyland can help?”

Celestia turned and abruptly hugged Luna. “You're a genius!” She looked up to Mei Long and Megan. “What do you think?”

Megan shrugged. “Well, I can't think of anything else off the top of my head, or horn. Or something.” She swiveled around, eyes narrowing. “Then again, I haven't been to Crystal Castle in about twenty-one years.”

Mei Long chuckled. “I would be honored to escort you there, Megan. Shall we depart now?”

Megan turned back to her and shook her head, mane swishing about. “Can it wait an hour? I got some stuff to teach Celestia and Luna concerning dimensional teleporting without a Rainbow Bridge and how to trace the nutjob's magic.”

Mei Long frowned, but nodded.

Danielle clapped her hands and grinned. “Okay, we got something of a plan together! Let's just hope we can pull it off in time.”

Luna turned and bent her head down to look into Spanish Steel's eyes. “General, get to Fort Bulwark and inform General Romper-Stomper of the situation. Tell him to prepare the Steel Hooves for war!”

Author's Note:

1. Massive thanks to Shubzilla for adding dialog to the conversation between the CB-Mane Six and the RB_Mane Six and for proofreading.

2. No, the Steel Hooves name is not a Fallout:Equestria reference.