Letters From A Disgruntled Friendship Student

by milesprower06

Viva Las Pegasus (Mixed, Massed, and Bashed)

Dear Flim Flam Brothers,

Ah guarantee that in less than two months, ya'll be broke and in the streets begging for money. Welcome to Las Pegasus, ya darn no good hooligans!

Signed,
Applejack

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Dear Tourists,

This resort isn't worth going to. You'll be conned like there was no tomorrow. Go someplace else.

The mare of honesty,
Applejack

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Dear Flim Flam Brothers,

If you two imbeciles ever try coming to Ponyville with a large crane, just be ready for a friendship lazor to fire you to oblivion.

Your ecofriendly princess,
Twilight Sparkle

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Dear Gladmane

Since you have this special talent for keeping ponies from leaving your resort, mind if we send a certain purple princess here?

-Fluttershy and Applejack

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THE FOAL FREE PRESS
GLADMANE HAS LEFT THE BUILDING LIVING

After Gladmane, the famous resort owner, was disgraced and lost his luxury resort to two con artists, he was devastated and soon after suffered depression.

Gladmane was scheduled to fly out of Marephis, but that same afternoon he was discovered unresponsive on his luxury bathroom floor. To put it bluntly... he died on the shitter... His death was officially pronounced at 3:30 p.m. at Baptrot Memorial Hospital, the cause of his death was due to an overdosed on some drugs.

His death has now been added onto the list of celebrity deaths that has occurred throughout this year. So, let him be forever remembered along with Prance, Muhammad Alicorn, Hayrambe and many others whose lives were cut short.

When interviewing other celebrities, here's what one of them has to say.

"Life is just a perfect illusion. One moment, you're here. The next thing, you're not," says Lady Rara.

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Dear Granddaughter,

Are those two hooligans arguing again? I thought I told them off last time at Apple Con 45!

Annoyed,
Granny Smith

Author's Note:

First off, terribly sorry for the completely unreasonable delay. The fault is absolutely 100% my own, due to complete lack of motivation.

I read Mix's contributions, and found myself so amused that I couldn't think of anything worthy to add. So consider this chapter Mixed, Massed, and Bashed.

Comments

[TheLolzKnight]

Perhaps a little too on the nose, but funny as ever.

[SuperPinkBrony12]

Figures Gladmane would meet the same fate as the rock star he was an expy of.

[Spartan-Guy 88]

Dear 06 P.L.R. (Post Luna's Return),

Great, just fan-fucking-tastic. You just HAD to take Mareie Fisher away from us at the last minute. PRINCESS PONEIA! Why?! You ALWAYS take away the ones we love the most!

Sincerely,
Star Mares Fanbase

[Red Bomber]

Lack of motivation? Were you hit by green paint by any chance?

[Neko Majin C]

the cause of his death was due to an overdosed on some drugs.

The d on the end should not be there.

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My dearest Mistress Princess Twilight Sparkle,

I hope you have fun on your vacation to Las Pegasus. I hope this one goes better than your last visit. I do not know why, but you came home in a pickle barrel like you had just lost all your money and clothes. It was probably just for comedic effect since you do not normally wear clothes, but you were in a really bad/horny mood. You got even more angry when you tried to take the pickle barrel off, but got stuck because you were too fa—the pickle barrel was too small. Then you got even angrier when I reminded you that you could just teleport out of the pickle barrel and you yelled at me that you would have eventually thought of that on your own, and to keep my fyaying mouth shut. Then you were really livid when pickle barrel teleported with you. You yelled at me saying that you told me that teleporting drunk was a bad idea. Luckily, you finally got so angry that you burst into flames and the pickle barrel exploded. Good thing for me that I was only hit by two pieces of shrapnel, so I was completely unconscious when my left leg was shattered.

Signed your loyal slave who is truely grateful that you let him recuperate for a couple days before you put him back to work,
Neko Majin C.

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~KBO.

[ferret]

The joke is that in that timeline, the apple trees rebelled and laid a bloody swath all across Equestria, and only the industrial machinery of the Flim Flam brothers could save everypony from their vengeful campaign.

[Snowdrifter]

7888975

So, Flim and Flam saved everypony from...
(Wait for it...)

...the Apple-calypse?

[F14m3rz]

Dear Granddaughter,
Are those two hooligans arguing again? I thought I told them off last time at Apple Con 45!
Annoyed,
Granny Smith

Sweet, you referenced the comics.

[ferret]

7889911

It'd be like Pacific Rim! With apples!

[euphgeek]

7887963
Dear Star Mares Fanbase,

Just wait until you see what I have in store for Marey Tailer Moore.

Sincerely,
07 P.L.R.

[Alex Warlorn]

I was actually liking the story, since it was a nice change of pace for this story for once not to rely on sex jokes, OOC, or mindless gratuitous violence. For once we got some actually funny jokes with Twilight ready to blast Flim and Flam if the future she saw is going to become reality.

[MixMassBasher]

7941781 Wait till PPOV comes out. What I sent to miles really meta as it pokes fun at the concept of the story tropes itself.

[Alex Warlorn]

7942006

People in real life remember things insanely differently all the time.