• Member Since 10th Jun, 2014
  • offline last seen January 20th

SwiftM0nkey


hehehehe

E
Source

The mane six really love Anon, but he just doesn't seem to get it. Join them in their journey as they each try to win him over.
U-Um... Anon is... Well... Oh my...
He's a really great guy. I wouldn't mind having him as my lab assistant for life.
Nonny's the best! I love spending my time with him!
Anonymous has this sort of "flair" he brings about whenever he comes near. It's extremely enticing.
Yeah, I mean, Anon's like my best friend. Would be pretty cool if he were more though...
Anon's amazin'. So much that I actually kinda get erm... Well it feels like I got the creepy crawlies in mah stomach.

But why won't he notice me?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 44 )

6747961
*throws hands into the air* SPOILERS!!!

I have honestly never read a story told in 2nd person perspective that wouldn't be vastly improved by changing it to 1st or 3rd. Aside maybe from Choose Your Own Adventure stories, but those are pretty specialized.

Kind of saw that coming towards the end there, but still a good read.:pinkiehappy:

10/10 would convert to first person again.

The way every sentence was just a single line in this made it really hard for me to read. This was nice, but it wasn't really nice enough for much more than an upvote.

Hilarious like ROFL funny :rainbowlaugh:
that twist ending :pinkiegasp: had me in tears
Kind of wished it could have gone the other way but :raritydespair:
This is definitely comedy at its best :moustache:

Ha! Ending was fantastic. Great story man sure got me hooked.

You lay down and close your eyes with a heart full of determination.

i.imgur.com/sogLIeT.jpg

-Takes a deep breath-
:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:
That is all.

I wasn't a quarter through this before I thought "I am going to laugh me ass off if this ends with him being gay." I am now laughing.

Who is Anon? Someone's OC?

Wow.....ladies don't handle rejection very well....

Staring at anon with the "wtf face"

Big Mac aren't you gonna help!

Big Mac:( Looks at beating ) .......nope!

"What makes Rarity so good anyways?" I know right. And that ending was shit too, I feel bad for that mixture

6829414 good story but the ending had me gutting myself:pinkiesick:

6795962 yea me too realistically he should stop talking and avoid all of them hell maybe he can sue for assault and make it a racism case with him being gay and all mane 6 dont like gays so they beat them up that should hold up in a court maybe

6828451 what a bad coltfriend watching his lover get beaten and not saving him

I fucking called it

I really liket that story, especially the twist at the end. Only thing that sours my mood is the ending. He didn't deserve any kind of violence. He helped the girls out whenever he could and showed kindness to them. He didn't send off any signs that said that he definitely was interested in them. The girls can only blame themselves for what happened. And that they just decide to give him a beatdown just because he didn't take openly about his relationship... I mean, they are friends? What kind of friends do that? :flutterrage:

So yeah, really liked that story, but the ending... I can't say I enjoyed the injustice in which a nice guy gets a beatdown for no good reason... :ajsleepy:

There's a small score of problems with this story, and I'll tell you all of them.

First and least notable, you have put the hyphens preceding the second RD excerpt in Fluttershy's yellow.

Secondly, you're completely misusing italics. I got that you're using them to convey inner thoughts, but the inner thoughts of a character are by principle written in FIRST person. They're far more akin to spoken lines than narration.

Thirdly, that ending sucks oily ball bearings through a turbine, and it crashes and burns the whole fic just like BBs would do a real jet engine. There's fuck all that makes sense in the six getting into a fit of violent rage just because they were rejected by someone who they never asked if he liked them to begin with, and even less for Mac letting them wail on his coltfriend like he gives no fucks. There's no explaining this ridiculous OoC on the girls' part.

Is that just because Anon's a guy? Consider the following: would you do the same if this were a FiE with the Stallion Six and Macareina, have six rejected guys gang-wail a surprise lesbian that didn't choose them over the sister of one of them? No, you wouldn't. And it has no reason to be different just because of a gender flip. Saying otherwise is bigoted as fuck.

I hope that's enough justification as to why you have one more downvote. If not, tough, you got a downvote anyway.

Outis #23 · Feb 8th, 2016 · · 3 ·

So far only read the description.
Anon i will say this before all else, Grab a Luna (she is the NIGHT!) and RUN
Edit:
just read the ending, GIRLS SICK EM >:C
and knock the polygamy+bisexuality into him if possible.
here is a hammer.colourbox.com/preview/2515525-hammer-in-a-beautiful-female-hand-isolated-on-white-background.jpg

*during confessions* I bet he's gay... Yeah...

*after finding out anonymous is gay* OOOOOH MAAAHYY FAAUUKING GAUGHD! WHAAAHT!!

[Insert rage here]

Called it. Saw the rainbow said it's either rainbow dash or he's gay got half-way through reading and "yep gotta be gay".

WHAT DA FUDGE!!?:rainbowhuh:
did not see that coming!:rainbowderp:
sigh....:facehoof:
fine it really was good twist to the story and funny!:yay:

Half Way through: I bet you he's gay
*Later*
Somebody better pick up that phone! Cus I f*cking CALLED IT! I am loving that plot twist!

So they beat him up for being gay...that's a hate crime

I FUCKING KNEW THAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN

The ultimate twist would be to have Anon say, "You girls know I was just kidding when I said that I was taken by Mac, right?"

Anyways, hilarious story, looking forward to more of your stuff. :rainbowlaugh:

I know that last bit was supposed to be a joke, but all it does is sour the mood.

6916616 Somehow, I think you'll only accomplish beating the life out of him, possibly a serious case of death.

7609676 Good enough

-----
You look at yourself with the hat on in the mirror and laugh a little.
"This looks silly."
But if this is what Anon likes in a mare, you can be silly for as long as you're together.
Tank flies past you and lands on your bed. Taking off the hat and rope, you get on the bed.
This is it. Tomorrow is the big day.
You curl up with Tank.
"I won't lose to her."

You used the wrong color.

Only would have been better if Celestia and Luna were involved.

Right near the end when they were all telling him, i guessed at the thing with Mac. Ive read too much fanfiction XD

I loved everything up to the random beat down. That's why you get a favorite, read later, and a downvote. Thank you and I will now check out your other stories.

Set

A very interesting read. The way this was written couldve been a script for an episode.

......I was kind of rooting for Fluttershy but that ending made up for it :rainbowlaugh:

I'd like to think that by "beat down," you mean they all rape Anon, rather than literally beat him. Not that that's any better morally.

Comment posted by Ahzidal deleted Aug 1st, 2020

Final inesperado

Compartes un pequeño beso con tu amante, Big Mac.

I suspected such a conclusion

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