An unassuming mare gets a tempting offer by a stranger and takes them up on it. It's a gourmand's wish come true! What could go wrong?
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- Member Since 20th Dec, 2013
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David Silver
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David Silver
Joined 20th Dec, 2013 ·
Online
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And the moral of the story is 'deer are jerks'. That was also the moral of the comic with deer in it.
Not bad. Could maybe have focused on the part where she was eaten more if it was supposed to be that kind of story? But the transformation was well done.
6596160 I was asked to write a transformation story. I focused on that. The being eaten part? Not the focus, though important plot wise.
MUAHAHHA! The vore is written all over that last part intended or not XD
Not sure I will look at a white-chocolate Easter bunny the same way again... Ah who am I kidding, yes I will! I will start with the ears followed by the snout then the head and then whatever snaps off easiest.
I will say this was a very Twilight Zone like chapter. I could almost imagine the classic into and ending. Are all the stories going to be like this?
6596616 It's a oneshot. It came, it went. I liked it.
Well &%#$. That was a thing...
me
6597216 That... would be... Oh my...
I think I'd have to rate it gore, and maybe mature.
Wow this is creepy. O_o in a good way. This is well written and really makes the reader feel how the pony was feeling. Great job.
6597383 Many thanks!
A very interesting and original idea that was really well executed. Great job!
6600077 Thank you very much. The prompt was given to me, but I'm glad to hear the execution came out just so.
Wow creepy at least it had a happy ending.
This is one of the best (if not the best) inanimate tf stories I've read. Maybe it just strikes my taste well with the ending being a happy one despite most of the story being somewhat dark. Although there is that tiny bit of ambiguity at the end...huh...I don't know, I liked the execution of the story.
6606836 Thank you kindly, dear pony.
Be wary of 'excellent deals' offered by strange people, a classic lesson.
You cannot imagine the rush of relief than ran through me when it turned out to be just a dream.
6608549 But was it one?
6608576 For the sake of me being able to sleep tonight, I sure hope so. )*3*(
6606964 Yeeeaah...Although I did get a good deal for a rare item in an online game. It was awesome.
But yeah, the really sketchy ones are definitely to be avoided.
6608549 But it wasn't a dream. Her house was still messed up. She just didn't meet that horrifying demise, which is still good.
Hmm, (or should I say 'Mmmm!') this was oddly enjoyable!
Most typos seems to have fled in terror of being eaten, but I did find one straggler.
I has just come out - I had just come out
Thank you for continuing to share your work and creative vision with us!
6631381 It is now devoured, as befits all of typo's children!
Glad you liked it. It was a fun change of pace from my usual slice of life and/or adventure.
Hehe in a odd way reminds me of the oke comic where tei turned dash into a living trophy
Hehe can't help but think she still a chocolate pony but oddly only she can see her chocolate smooth skin
6685400 I haven't seen those, I confess, but glad you enjoyed the wild ride!
What's the dark tag for?
6692690 ... Maybe I got it wrong? Define dark.
6692718
Murder suicide
Killing someone as a joke.
6692724 It has to be murder suicide or killing as a joke to be dark? That tag has been wrongly used by most of the site then, I'm afraid.
6692733
I was giving an example it doesn't necessarily have to be those examples.
6692733
Saw this definition in a group
Dark: Stories that involve death, plagues, twilight going on rampages murdering all her friends, ect
6692755 Up to you if being sentenced to an eternal life of chocolatification qualifies, or how she might escape such a fate. Be creative.
6692771
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=G_v6oceppSg
6692771
Oh! Wait I got it. get touched by someone who when they touch something it turns to chocolate.
Might reverse it since they are already chocolate and was once a living thing.
6692791 That's not the idea another reader put forward. The ultimate escape would be to devour a living pony, then you get to remain a living pony. Shame the taste would never go away...
Is it dark enough yet?
6692949
That does seem dark but. Eh
orig14.deviantart.net/79a6/f/2014/018/9/9/derpy_shrug_by_bluemeganium-d72oelm.png
whom (but then, the character can aleays make common mistakes, too.)
Cuteceañaras (it's based on quinceañara )
were (with above caveat)
perhaps write a note…?
Huh. Wasn't expecting the ending.
6812272 Cuteceañara fixed for all the little fillies and colts! Hope you enjoyed it.
Ha.
Solution... Go lick a pony!
6995782 You have to eat the target. Nom nom nom.
6995962 well that's dark. You would have to swallow them whole while they were alive then.
From then on, she turned into a chocolate statue again once a moon, or roughly once a month. She eventually began selling a monthly pony statue special. It took some time, but she also figured out how to tie herself down in different positions so each statue was unique, and eventually learned that she could effect her filling by chewing the desired flavor as the transformation happened. A few years later, she met the stallion of her dreams. When she eventually broke her dark secret to him, he took it in stride, and a very kinky monthly ritual began… though she had to discontinue her monthly special.
Despite all this, if she ever sees that deer again, she's going to make her drink the potion and then force a rotten tomato down her throat.
7249023 The end! I trust you enjoyed the story?
7249032
Yes, I did. It's on my ‘read it again once enough time has passed that I've forgotten some of it’ list.
i like it, any chance for more?
8314612
Alas, this is a one shot, so unlikely.
8314925
but it's so good
Clearly, she should have asked for clarification on what the deer meant rather than asking what the catch was. That potion could've sold for way more than 400 bits to the right pony.