Ponyfinder: Roots of Stone

by David Silver

27 - Are You not Entertained?

That gnomish under king smiled in a not entirely wholesome way. Ronfiz leaned forward on his warhammer. "Well, boys, I suppose we owe them a little something, for the inconvenience..." The other two gave quiet half-laughs at the idea, but he paid them little mind. "Now, the way I see it, Vorner's a damn idiot for thinking you'd be anything but trouble as slaves." He waved a hand at the group. "You're still armed, just to start. Don't you worry, I'll give him a talking to, but we're here about a crown, not the management of my crew." The party's eyes were on him, waiting for the bad news to drop. He tapped the sun crown lightly. "I took this by right of conquest, only fair you get the same chance."

The gnome on the left suddenly slapped a fist against his left palm. "Hey! Why don't we get them to round up all the slaves they just let out and a few more while they're at it?"

Maud shook her head. "I refuse."

Ronfiz peered at Maud. "That was the flattest refusal I heard in a while. You feeling chummy towards those vermin? Fine, there's plenty of work that needs doing. You seem like a group ready to throw down, maybe you could do us a bit of a favor." He made a come hither gesture with a finger towards Fast's lance. "We'll be taking that afterwards. It really is delightfully shiny."

Fast couldn't see what he was gesturing at. "What do you need done?"

Tree could, and leaned in towards Fast to share the fact in a soft whisper. "He wants your righteous lance."

Fast stomped a hoof, but calmed herself. "Right, yes... That's a steep price, taking a warrior's weapon."

"Taking it or leaving it?" Ronfiz raised a large eyebrow at her. "If you just need an escort out of our tunnels, we'll look forward to not seeing you again."

"No, no..." Fast tried to orient herself more specifically at the voice, but couldn't meet eyes with the short figure. "A fair price, one artifact for another. My treasured part of my identity for one of yours. It's even poetic, perhaps."

"Right!" He swung his hammer up and slung it over his back easily. "I'm glad we agree. In fact, just so that there are no misunderstandings, we'll even trade right now. The way you'll be going, you'll have to come back through us anyway, so this is me being polite." He inclined his head towards the gnome on the right, who plucked off the crown and advanced towards the adventurers.

Flint put a hand on Fast's lance. "Ya sure?" She nodded and he gave a twist before yanking it free of its holding harness. He presented the weapon to the gnome, and accepted the crown in its stead. It had a satisfying weight to it despite its delicate appearance. Unsure of where to put it, Flint placed it gently on Fast's head.

Vision returned. She could see, even piercing the darkness. An alien power seemed to tingle through her. It took every effort to stop from grinning. She was sure she had found the artifact she sought. The loss of her treasured lance would be worth it. "What task did you want for us?"

"Oh, just a small thing, a trifle for trained warriors like your group there." Ronfiz waved it off as if it were nothing.

His friend on the left agreed with a shrug. "Barely anything. I'm not even sure why he's having you do it."

The gnome on the right joined in without prompting. "You'll probably be done and out of here in an hour or two."

Paul looked hopefully optimistic. "Oh, um, alright, so what is it?"

Maud put a hoof to her chest. "If you keep your side of the bargain, we will keep ours."

Ronfiz leveled a finger with her. "I get the feeling you mean that. A pleasure dealing with honest folk at times. Alright, enough suspense. There's a wee little horror in the tunnels. Kill it, drag its body back here, and it'll serve as your passport through the tunnels. We'll walk you right to where you can get to the surface fast. That is where you came from, isn't it?"

Fast inclined her ears at Ron. "Fair enough, but a hint of what we'll be facing would be appreciated." Being able to look at him properly put her on better standing, and some of her nervousness abated. "If we're prepared, we can make it dead faster."

Tree tilted her head. "It's not... like us, is it? I don't want to attack innocent things, even if they're ugly on the outside, we're all beautiful on the inside."

Ronfiz waved the objection away. "It isn't thinking. No, this here's a rust monster."

Fast paled slightly. "I see why you did the trade first then, but a rust monster is more inconvenience than horror, especially properly armed. Why haven't you slain the beast yourself by now?"

The gnome on the left snickered softly. "It isn't your normal rust monster. This one's a great big dad of them all. It can rust your insides out, and metal doesn't even stand a chance."

Ronfiz nodded. "Fair summary. I'm not heartless, and I do want the damn thing removed, so you can borrow our wooden weapons. I'd offer armor, but you're not exactly sized right to be wearing gnome armor, now are ya?"

Maud looked over at the others. "One sword, one mace, one lance. The rest of us are ready."

Fast began to squirm out of her armor before picking her shield back up in her mouth. "At least I had the sense to use a wooden one. Fine, an overgrown rust monster. We'll free your mines of its presence."

Flint raised a finger. "Actually, about that sword. I don't suppose ya have a bow layin' about?"

The one on the right turned away and began heading away from the others. "Come on, let's get you suited up. We don't have too much in your size, but some." He led them through the tunnels, brushing aside other gnomes that came into view. "Piss off, they're going to die or be useful, you could do the same." Without opposition, he reached the armory swiftly. Picks and crossbows were the weapons of majority, while armor ranged from heavy clothes to chainmail, all sized for a small humanoid figure, to nobody's surprise. "We were readying for a scrap with them, and some of the, uh, acquisitions we've had are not metal, so take what you want that ain't metal."

Paul set his weapon down, leaning it against the wall before he hefted up a mace that seemed constructed of a long single bone. It was intimidating, ghastly, and somehow appealing. "Ah look like a right proper terror of the battle, eh?"

Flint snorted. "Don't get too used to it. Bone weapons can snap at the worst time." He trailed his fingers along the collection a moment before his eyes found what he sought. He snatched up the longbow and quiver and looked the both over. They seemed of elven make, as far as he could determine. "You've entertained quite a variety I see."

The gnome snorted at that. "Best entertainment of their lives."

There was no lance to be had, to Fast's annoyance, but there was a stout looking staff. She set her shield aside and picked up the staff, feeling the weight of it before she slid it home on her harness. "Not my preferred choice, but it'll do and it fits." She hefted her shield up. "Everyone ready?"

Shrugging his shoulders, the gnome gestured over his shoulder for the party to follow after him. "Right, if you're done saying your last words, let's get on with it." He began marching through the tunnels, fingers dancing over a heavy pick at his side. "Just remember it'll feed on your insides as much as anything metal. It can smell you with those feathery things it's got, and it won't delay to gobble you up like a starving man at a banquet."

They arrived at a heavy stone door and he knocked on it with the back of a fist. "We put this here so the damn thing wouldn't come storming into our tunnels. It isn't smart enough to work a handle. I trust you are, so get to it, after I'm out of the way." He gave an almost mocking salute as he walked past them all towards the safety of the tunnels.

Flint sighed as he looked towards the door. "Some part of me wants to just lure the thing right on top of them."

Fast raised a hoof. "And yet we're not going to do that. They made a trade, and haven't gone back on it so far. We have what we came for."

Paul peered at Fast and her crown. "Is that really it?"

"I think so." Her eyes turned upwards, but she couldn't see it very well on her own head. "It feels special. By the Unspoken's beard, it gave me my sight back. I swear I can see in the dark. Who knows what other properties it may have while worn by a pony, instead of a gnome king."

Flint hiked a thumb back at where they came from. "Bet he can already see in the dark. He wouldn't even notice that if it did do that."

Tree tapped at her chin. "Wait, if this thing totally digs the taste of metal, won't it eat the crown?"

Fast frowned. "The thought had occurred, but if it's a proper artifact, destroying it shouldn't be so easy. It may even give us a moment to attack it while it's trying to eat what can't be eaten. If it isn't, then it's probably not going to do what I want it to, and this entire mission's a failure." She tapped a hoof against the door. "Let's not consider that for too long."

Maud moved up beside Fast. "Let's do it. They felt like rocks. We can trust them."

Tree tilted her head at Maud. "That's a trippy way to decide who's groovy or not, but I trust you, sister of stone." She reached for the handle of the door with her mouth and gave it a turn, slowly pushing it forward with a low rumble of stone against stone.

Beyond the door looked like well-carved tunnels that seemed lived in at some recent time, though there were no signs of life at that moment. Fast nodded as she slowly walked forward. "I don't hear any beasts rushing to eat us just yet. Let's stay together, stay alert, and stay alive."

Paul drew his bone weapon free and swung it experimentally as he advanced behind Maud and Fast. "Ah'm as ready as ah'll ever be."

They didn't have to wait long to detect the presence of something. A scuttling sound emerged from the darkness ahead before a hulking insect-like creature came charging at them, its two long antennae twitching forward at the potential meal close at hand.

Author's Note:

What? Just a rust monster? No big deal. Like typos, we will defeat it!

What do you mean they added templates and such to it? What kind of horrible GM does that?!

Comments

[RadicalDishonesty]

Is Paul southern, now?

Apparently he's at least rather committed to blunt weapons. I don't think I remember him acclimating specifically to that but...

Well, once something is nailed down for Paul I'd appreciate a stat sheet.

Well... is Maud right about being able to trust the dark gnomes? I suppose the fact that the party would be hard as hell to put down (sacrificing more troops) is at least a decent bit of leverage for the party.

[David Silver]

6668492 Unlike many with 'dark' in their name (SO RACIST), they are neutral, rather than some variety of evil.

[terrycloth]

So it's a Humongous Enraged Extra-Undead Ancient Rust Monster With Mate?

[Steel Prism]

Well lets see how this battle goes. Have to say went an poked a rust monster to see what its stats are like and don't look as bad as they make it out to be. As long as you got not much metal should be too bad

[Booster Spice]

Rust Monster? Wow, now theres a nasty suprise for your classic squad of metal heads who have never heard of one before. They got a 1 for diplomacy and information? Oh boy. Rocks fall.

Adding templates is a Monster variation of PC creation, meaning if they combat right, they could use a Pokeball in other situations?

[albedoequals1]

Fast paled lightly.

slightly (pale and light are mostly the same thing)

We were readying for a scarp with them,

scrap

It may even give us a moment to attack of while it's trying to eat what can't be eaten.

Remove "of"

Maud moved up beside Fast. "Let's do it. They felt like rocks. We can trust them."

Tree tilted her head at Maud. "That's a trippy way to decide who's groovy or not, but I trust you, sister of stone."

Well, it works for Toph.

What do you mean they added templates and such to it? What kind of horrible GM does that?!

*raises hand*

Whether they kill the monster, or the monster kills them, this shouldn't take very long. It would seem that Fast is about to achieve the first step of her quest. Unfortunately, it's also the easiest step. Now she has to try her metaphorical glass slipper on every eligible pony in the land, and I sincerely doubt it's that simple.

[David Silver]

6670557 Typos thrown to the rust monster. Maybe it'll calm down before it devours our heroes.