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Fizzy Orange

Joined March 2012
99 followers

Stories (13)

  • Carrot Top of the Line
    Lunaverse Carrot Top must speak with shy recluse Fluttershy when Angel steals her carrots.

    8,922 words · 3,294 views · 198 likes · 3 dislikes
  • Where There is Smoke
    Lunaverse story. Trixie, Pokey and Raindrops investigate strange fires occuring all around Ponyville. Meanwhile, Corona unleashes one of her minion on the world to get her revenge on the Elements. Could the two events be related?
    19,460 words · 2,886 views · 209 likes · 4 dislikes
  • Secret of Andalantis
    Lunaverse, On a trip to the beach Ditzy dissapears underwater, adventure ensue
    33,490 words · 2,482 views · 146 likes · 2 dislikes
  • File Under 'I' for 'Impossible'
    Lunaverse Trixie tries to find an assistant to help with her paperwork.
    8,716 words · 3,390 views · 253 likes · 6 dislikes
  • Bride of the Rain
    1,198 words · 848 views · 79 likes · 1 dislikes
  • Raindrops of Clan Drops, Barbarian Queen
    2,857 words · 982 views · 73 likes · 1 dislikes
  • Longest Night: Everypony's Day
    31,483 words · 2,166 views · 164 likes · 6 dislikes
  • Luna's Pet Project
    3,359 words · 1,026 views · 109 likes · 5 dislikes
  • Discord meets Discord and Discord
    1,198 words · 305 views · 28 likes · 0 dislikes
  • A Nice Quiet Drink
    1,393 words · 350 views · 32 likes · 1 dislikes

Blog Posts (31)


Set in RainbowDoubleDash's Lunaverse. Angel has been stealing Carrot Top's crops for a few days now, something he never did before. Worried about this turn of event, the farmer decides to have a talk with Fluttershy. This is easier said than done. With Ditzy and Dinky out of town, Carrot Top will need the help of Rainbow Dash to confront the shy recluse. When Rainbow Dash initially refuses, Carrot Top must push herself to be more assertive and get to the bottom of this story.

This story takes place about two weeks after Boast Busted. For official chronological order of Lunaverse stories, and everything Lunaverse, please come visit us in the Lunaverse Group!

Many thanks to FredMSloniker for editing and proofreading.

First Published
4th Jun 2012
Last Modified
17th Jun 2012

Comments ( 77 )

#1 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 1d ago · · ·

Aha! It's up.

Oh, that reminds me, with this story, we've passed "Boast Busted" chronologically, right?

#2 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 1d ago · · ·

>>692536 Eeyup! :eeyup:

I've set this two weeks after Boast Busted (or so). I'm also thinking of setting a story roughly at the same time centered on Trixie and the other's trip to Cayo el Bayo :pinkiehappy:

#3 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 1d ago · · ·

Hee, I actually like this version of Rarity, she comes off a lot nicer than the Cannon one

#4 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 1d ago · · ·

>>692690 Really? I actually wanted to make her feel like her generous Maneverse self :twilightsheepish: well whatever makes her sympathetic works for me!

#5 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 1d ago · · ·

A Fluttershy prominent story where a character worries about being an unassertive doormat?

Will we see what Lunaverse Iron Will is like? Because that would be awesome!

#6 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 1d ago · · ·

Well, at least Rainbow Dash is consistent. Most of what she is is someone who's trying to psych herself into believing that she's not totally worthless. Hmmmm. If she had actual self-confidence, she'd be less of a jerk.

(Hint, when writing the "Ditzy tries to get Fluttershy out of her alcove" thing, allude as to how grateful Ditzy is that RD only superficially resembles her past self.)

#7 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 1d ago · · ·

Looking good! It certainly would be nice to see L!Iron Will, it's good to see L!Rarity displayed in a positive light and the idea of Angel doing Fluttershy's shopping is great!

#8 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 22h ago · · ·

intresting:moustache:

#9 · Chapter 1 · 112w, 21h ago · · ·

Quite nice, there. *Readies shotgun* Here Angel... Striker's got some nice twelve-gauge for you... :pinkiecrazy:

#10 · Chapter 1 · 111w, 6d ago · · ·

Even though she's not the Generosity of this world, it's quite interesting that Rarity was the one to talk to CT. :)

#11 · Chapter 1 · 111w, 1d ago · · ·

AAAAAANNNND we have a CT story! Poor Carrot~ she needs more stories! Anywayz write moar or i'll unleash my Photo Finish/Tilda/Octotrope army on you!

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#12 · Chapter 1 · 111w, 1d ago · · ·

i find it odd that rarity doesn't know fluttershy in cannon it seemed like they'd known each other for quite awhile before twilight came to town. still a good read.

#13 · Chapter 1 · 111w, 1d ago · · ·

>>728664 Lunaverse Fluttershy is much more of a recluse than Maneverse Fluttershy. It's been established in previous stories that she only interacts with Rainbow Dash, Ditzy and Dinky.

#14 · Chapter 1 · 111w, 13h ago · · ·

Rarity and Carrot Top talking is inherently funny to me (Element of Generosity and all that). More so than any of the other counterpart elements somehow, maybe because they totally don't seem like counterparts at first glance.

#15 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

she got laryngitis didnt she?

#16 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

Nuts. You used a quote that I was hoping to use in "Helping." Eh, I'll use it anyway.

I'm a bit surprised at how easily Rainbow Dash opened up to Carrot Top there.

#17 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

Darn you Fizzy Orange! You've made me sympathetic towards Lunaverse RD. Now I don't know if I want to give her a big hug or throttle her.

Although I guess I could do both at once... :pinkiecrazy:

#18 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>737438

Turn it into a running gag!

"Aren't you a little short for a Wonderbolt?"

#19 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

Hehehe. Poison joke, innit?

#20 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

Both now and last chapter, I really do love all the ways you describe Carrot Top's facial expressions.  Every time she pouts, flusters, or any other such the image is smeared across my mind's eye.  I constantly find myself rereading those lines just for sheer pleasure of image they invoke.  Seeing Carrot Top pull out a  modified Pinkie Pie Swear was a bit odd, but kinda cool, also hella' painful sounding (Carrots being pointy and all).

And its OFFICIAL, Rainbow Dash is in the indirect employment of the Posey family to keep an eye on their timid little daughter.  As a strong proponent of that theory, I'm very glad to see this happen.  She also rightly doubts her ability to perform at her cover job, and has a high respect for Raindrops despite their otherwise antagonistic relationship (that'll play nicely into what I'd already planned).

Anyway, Fluttering Posey eh?  Always fun to get a pony's real/full name. Watching her and Dash meeting and start playing together as fillies was so adorable.  The Firefly plush struck me as a little odd though.  Even if she was on the team all those years ago, I doubt she'd have been captain.  Unless the public names are all part of the act, or it was a relative going by the same name.

Anyway, I noticed a few errors, but they were only a minor inconvenience to my enjoyment of this increasingly wonderful fic.  One more thing though...

but as she neared the house all of that resolve had faded away

This is so very me.  I couldn't even consider counting the number of times I've worked up the nerve and resolved myself to a course of action, only hesitate or back out entirely right before actually going through with it.

>>737438

I'd wager it's a combination of stress, not knowing how to fix things, and Carrot Top's openly helpful & caring nature.

>>737523

That's where my mind weant, can't wait to find out.

#21 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>737404

.....Okay, I admit to such a condition being overall plausible, but I have trouble imagining Fluttershy overusing her voice to that extent.

Let me look up causes for laryngitis real quick...

    Colds or flu. This is the most common cause.

    Acid reflux, also known as gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD). This type of laryngitis is also called reflux laryngitis.

    Overuse of your voice, such as cheering at a sports event.

    Irritation, such as from allergies or smoke.

Okay, with that list I think a really bad flu might explain everything.

Someone needs to put together some Lunaverse emotes for us to use around here because, Fizzy, you deserve some Carrot Tops.

I'll just have to owe them to you.

#22 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

You know, as much of a jerk Rainbow is, the fact she protects Fluttershy is so heartwarming....though that fact is the reason why she's such a jerk......huh.

#23 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

Hmm, I like this. Character development, opening up. Very good!

#24 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>737438 Which quote? :trixieshiftright: I know it was a bit easy but I chalk it up to stress and fatigue combined with Carrot Top's charisma. :pinkiesmile:

>>737507 Mission Accomplished then! :rainbowdetermined2:

>>738117 The current captain of the wonderbolt is Spitfire. Firefly is the G1 pony that inspired Rainbow Dash, and Lauren Faust's deviantArt account is named 'Fire-Flye'. :raritywink: I'm glad you like all the facial expressions! Communication is only 7% dialogue, all the rest is non-verbal, so I try to include as much as possible in my stories. I know what you mean about the fading resolve. You could say there's bit of me in Carrot Top. :twilightsmile:

>>738232 I'd love some Carrot Top emotes! I really enjoy writing her, maybe I'll write more story starring her in the future.

>>739510 Well let's not blame everything on poor Fluttershy  :fluttershbad:

>>739989 Thanks!

#25 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>740180

I blame Mr. Posey and Rainbow Dash's big sister instinct.

#26 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>740180

"Help me, ______, you're my only hope!"

#27 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>740229 :rainbowlaugh: great minds think alike :derpytongue2:

#28 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>740180

Damn it!  You're right.  How the heck did I mix the two up?  I feel like such a bad brony now. :raritycry:

Maybe I'll just pretend that you had it wrong and stealth fixed it to make me look the fool.  Also, that you hacked my account to change my post.  Yes, it's such a perfect plan. :trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright:

More seriously though I'll just blame it on getting distracted while reading because my new story went live at about the same time, and so I kept flipping over to check comments as they came in.

#29 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>740240 Yes, distractions!:derpyderp2: Perfectly believeable. :twilightsmile:

#30 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

I really like the haracter development here.

#31 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 6d ago · · ·

>>741426 Thanks! I hope you'll like the rest.

#32 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 5d ago · · ·

I really like your backstory for Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash here! Flutterdad is pretty cool, and even though he's willing to extort Rainbow a little bit, he's a decent pony. I love the fact that Cloudia was able to bring Rainbow to work with her when she was sick. Ponies are nice that way.

#33 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 5d ago · · ·

It's intresting that the Lunaverse is a lot less clausterphobic when it comes to dealing with outside characters. Not sure if it's a side effect of Faust and Friends letting the fanon develop outside of the manes, or having the originals to work off of, but it's kinda nice to have the Heroes' style of worldbuilding in play. (Back when it was building the world, and not eating it's own tail. :trixieshiftleft:) Anyway, the graphic novel web comics that split off was probably the best part of the show, in that they didn't have to focus on the leads and could go off in weird directions.

#34 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 5d ago · · ·

>>746169 Yeah I didn't want Fluttershy's dad to come off as an 'evil corporatist' or something like that. He's a bit agressive when it comes to buisness and stuff, but he's essentially a nice guy that care about his daughter, and respects his faithful employees. Its just that he doesn't quite grasp the concept of selflessness and felt that he needed to bribe or force Rainbow Dash.

>>746739 I think its a combination of factors. First of all we aren't limited by animation models or available voice cast, we have the original we can work off of, and as fans who give names to nameless background ponies we kind of care about the tiertiary character a bit more. Plus I love world building :pinkiehappy: so I do my best to fill up Ponyville, drop story threads and seeds of ideas that other authors can pick up, and help expand the mythology of the world. I'm no Merriweather Willians, give me a story about friggin DRAGONS to write and I wouldn't just waste it on a stupid peer pressure plot without doing any world building! :facehoof:

#35 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 5d ago · · ·

I like this Rainbow Dash a bit more than I did. Problem is that owing to Well-meaning Idiot Flutterdad, she's in a bind. That, I think, would mean that if/when Ditzy tries helping Fluttershy out of her shell, she'll also be doing it to help somepony :rainbowhuh: who might not want it either.

#36 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 4d ago · · ·

Interesting story, looking forward to what happens next. Kind of ironic that Fluttershy's social problems are worse in the Lunaverse because she and Dash are closer friends.

I can also definitely see how Dash's insecurities would have a self loathing spin. In the canonverse her bragging is a need for recognition and attention of all the acomplishments she's so proud of, while in the Lunaverse she isn't as proud since she didn't earn (in her mind) much of what she has, and her attitude suffers as a result.

#37 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 3d ago · · ·

I very much like where this story is going. What you've done with Carrot Top has moved her up quite a bit in my list.

#38 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 3d ago · · ·

>>755851 It moved her up in MY list too :derpytongue2: I ended up buying a 'Golden Harvest' blind bag pony from the UK on Ebay!

#39 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 2d ago · · ·

I've finally gotten around to editing the chapter, so the revisions should be up as soon as Fizzy sees them! :twilightsmile:

#40 · Chapter 2 · 110w, 2d ago · · ·

Here we go! Updated! >>758652 thank you again!

#41 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

Here we are folks! Last chapter of my little tale! Some of you guessed it right last chapter it seems :pinkiehappy:

While I may be willing to write the  episode with Photo Finish that I've set up in the ending, I'm not all that confortable writing it. So if anypony wants a crack at it, tell me and I'll let you go ahead. Either way I'll be working on something different for a while.

Well hope you liked it and see ya next time!

#42 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

Excellent! :pinkiehappy: Poison joke, of course! That makes a lot of sense. Also, I assume Carrot Top took the bits from Angel. *Punts bunny through a wall* :scootangel: Nice to see Carrot Top's relationships evolving, which is something needed methinks.

#43 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

Nice one! And of course, ends with a set up for the next episode.

#44 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

Excellent ending!

#45 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

Angel is a magnificent bastard, capable of pulling off a successful Batman Gambit. Well played.

And now Carrot Top is gonna be a model! Awesome.

I enjoyed this alot.

#46 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

And yet another of your stories comes to a very sudden and easily resolved end.  On some levels I appreciate tha; no fuss, no muss.  On other levels though I can't help but feel like all that wonderful set up in the first chapters is sort of wasted on a lack luster ending.  Then again that's probably why you've got two finished stories under your belt while I'm still struggling to get mine to it's end point, so who's to say what's best.  Over all though I really do enjoy your writing, especially for this story.

You really brought Carrot Top to life for me and made me truely care about her, where as before I would have indisputably described her as the member of the L6 that interested me the least.  That might still be true, but it would be a rougher call now.  So if nothing else feel proud of that.  I've especial enjoyed CTs constant attempts to destroy the world around her with her gaze alone.  It's such a charmingly endearing character quirk.

The poison joke wasn't all that surprising, but adequately used.  What I real enjoyed seeing pan out was my suspicion that Angel had been conspiring to get CT's help from the outset, very well played.

Then of course there's Rarity, my favorite M6.  I'm so glad the boards helped flesh out this presentation of her, I simply adore that her L! persona is that of a favor trader.

#47 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

>>763540 Maybe it's because I've only written Slice of Life stuff so far, and thus I sort of match my story to what it would feel like as an episode of the TV series (hence short and tidy resolution). Wait until I get to an adventure and whip out some EPIC ACTION ENDINGS, you'll see another side to my writing :rainbowdetermined2:.

Thanks for the good words! I'm glad I helped better define CT in your mind, it was a bit of a challenge for me as well, but I really like this Carrot Top I've helped bring to life. Especially that little glaring quirk, like she's angry but she's too unassertive to physically express it. Personally the one that still stumps me is Lyra. I want to include her in my next story so I'll have to work on my mental image of her a bit more.

Also I'm happy we can have a manipulative Rarity :raritywink:

#48 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

>>763581

I look forward to your eventual something of epic scale.  Though I certainly don't fault what you've written so far for not being that.  They both only felt about a chapter short to me.  Then again part of me is starting to feel like my own might be almost chapter too long (or at least half a chapter), so again, who can say what's best.  

Also I'm happy we can have a manipulative Rarity :raritywink:
It almost makes me wish I had any ideas that worked with her.  Alas I fear my next planed tale won't include any of the M6, which is actually a good thing.  Can't go over rellying on them or they'll muddy up the integrity of the Lunaverse.

#49 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

>>763667 I was thinking the same thing. I don't intend to use any of the M6 for any of the three stories I have on my mind right now. At least not in any important quality.

#50 · Chapter 3 · 110w, 1d ago · · ·

Great ending! Carrot Top might not quite have avoided being a doormat in the end, but she took a chance on confronting Rainbow Dash and it paid off, which is a big step forward. Her inherent generosity really comes through in this last chapter, too, with all the work she did for Fluttershy. It was nice.

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