Dash's friends admitted to their parts in their trick, but one event is left unaccounted for. Who was it who saved the mare in the balloon. Did the 5 really invent Mare Do Well themselves or did they merely borrow the mantel in their attempts to teach Dash a lesson. This is the story of the young mare who became an unknowing pawn in their plan and her continued adventures as The Mysterious Mare Do Well.
This is my first fanfic ever, It was based on the idea i had when watching the Mare Do Well episode and wanting it to be a real hero rather then what we got, so when they failed to mention the first event, the idea of them impersonating the real Mare Do Well grew. Constructive criticism is most appreciated
Chapters (7)
Good Story!
665490
Thanks ^^
its gonig better!
nice start, but there are a few spelling errors I noticed
she used her magic to brake it off the tree I think it should be break
After dawning the rest of her costume I think Donning is what you're looking for
Forgotten Sound.... I wander if anyone outside of my parents... should be wonder
Still, your story looks like it has potential
692845
huh, i didn't notice those, thanks for pointing them out (kinda wish someone did that sooner in fact)
692854
You also seem to use 'stud' instead of 'stood' fairly regualarly that I noticed while reading through this and you've got more than a few instances where you've got a non-capitalised I when you should have one.
The other suggestion I've got is that a lot of people tend to use italics to indicate a person's thoughts so maybe it would be clearer to have all of Sound's "speech" in italics so people can tell at a glance that it's thoughts rather than actual speech.
Beyond those, this looks fairly interesting so I'm going to keep a track of it.
694186
yeah i notice that too that i use stud instead of stood. for some reason i never notice it until after im done and its uploaded
seriously they were just being kids and it was a prank
>>Deathpony
Hey, everyone's got to start somewhere. If anything this is sort of the stuff I'd see in ponyvile compaired to any other crimes you might see in Phillydephia, manehannten or even canterlot.