It has been 18 years since Celestia and Luna departed from this world for the next, leaving Twilight Sparkle in charge of Equestria. An old threat has reared it's ugly head, and now she must rise up to stop it.
The problem? She can't. She hates to admit it, Scratch, the Eternal Warden of Tartarus, is right. The Elements of Harmony have left her and her friends, and are ready to pass on to new blood. But who?
Meanwhile, Twilight's niece, Flurry Heart, has been sent to a little town called Ponyville to "Do herself some good" they said. On the train she meets a rather lazy colt who starts to show her around town.
Ponies have been getting more and more violent... They'll jump more quickly to anger than they used to...
And the summer has been unusually cold.
Not bad so far, but why no mention of Starlight and Sunburst? You'd think Flurry would spare a thought for her Crystaller...
Uhhhh.....
How did Celestia, Luna, and Discord die, because they're immortal. They lived for a thousand years, I doubt they could die.
Also, how did you guess part of the plot from Elements of Equestria: Act 2: Ice. Until I get an answer, I'll just say great minds think alike.
Oh, I get it now. Scratch is a like Francis from Deadpool. He keeps saying, "Say my name." But is it really a surprise that Scratch's real name is Entropy, I'm guessing.
Also, how dare you come up with the same ideas as my. If I wasn't so passive aggressive, I'd write a few choose words about you (I'm bluffing, this is a great story, if bland so far, needs more cliffhangers, I'd suggest you check out my story "My Little Pony: Elements of Equestria: Act 1: Fire".
I've been waiting for this!
This is really interesting, and Scratch isn't really likable character (this is meant as a compliment, as i take it he isn't meant to be likable). I can't wait to find out more about how the new element bearers are now!
7192246 Atlantis, they died in the prequel fic to this. This is a sequel. Go read "The Alicorn King's Glare."
7193164 Noooooo They died between fics....
7193164 I have read "The Alicorn King's Glare", and I liked it. Why else would it be on my user page?
So far, so good. Aside from a tendency to leave the s off of your she's, I don't see a whole lot of mistakes. I look forward to reading more!
Do I need to read anything else to understand this one?
7205147 Anything you may have, you already did.
7205158 Uh, that a no?
7205172 Yeah, thats a no
7205185 Got it.
The Purge reference.
7193164 AKG was never meant to have a sequel. Light said so.
So, basically this guy?
vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/half-life/images/2/27/G-man_heart_to_heart_headshot.jpg/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/270?cb=20100621095818&path-prefix=en
"Wake up, Ms. Sparkle. Wake up, and smell the ashes..."
Hm. You've caught my interest.
7193172 Wait, what? I'm lost now. . .
7193172 Between which fics then, I feel like I'm missing something obvious.
And I thought it was AKG because it sounded like she was referencing AKG.
7193172 Okay, I think I figured it out now. Why I thought this was a sequel to AKG.
It's because of what you said in the Author's note of AKG. That any fic taking place S5+ is technically a sequel.
Oh, and you flat out brought up Seraphim Glare in the first chapter.
I like, but if Scratch is so powerful, why did he even need a knife? Small thing, I know, but still.
Well, damn.
Scratch is a very interesting character for the asshole he is. His backstory's a mystery (calling it, he's Entropy in a weaker state), and his motives are unclear, other than he "wants out."
If all this came from your head, Light, I'm scared to know you in real life.
And that's coming from a guy without a mind.
7229564
If you've ever seen the Super Sentai show Go-Busters I think its sort of how Jin is able to appear in the real world while he's technically trapped in the sub dimension.
Simply put: the "Scratch" we perceive in Equestria is most likely an avatar of some sort, a puppet for the "real" Scratch to act through while still being imprisoned in Tartarus. I also expect that thats why he needed the knife, any supernatural abilities he has are probably sealed in there with him.
Am I close Mr. Author?
7231018 I can neither confirm or deny any theories you may have.
In all seriousness though, you're both close.
7231018 Yeah, I've never even of, let alone seen, that show. Though it would explain how he can be in two places at once. I have a character that is similar (by coincidence, I assure you), but she is can literally be everywhere and nowhere at all at the same time because she is a bad as it get, the pony reincarnation of the Devil himself.
That last line in the Author's Notes amused me far more than it had any reason to.
Y'know... That might actually be just crazy enough to work. If the best-laid plans never survive enemy contact, maybe a poor plan will. Yikes.
Okay, Pound Cake seems like he's going to be perhaps the most reasonable character in this story, and for some reason that pleases me immensely.
...Damn. It's obvious that Scratch is a bad guy, but even just threatening to do what he said this chapter crosses the line. Every line, for that matter.
I'll help you make this into an audio drama. Plus, I was hoping you would make Pinkie Pie turn evil like I suggested you do. Oh well, there are three more chances to do it. And I can easily say that Scratch is intimidating, but he still has nothing on Devia, who will be introduced in my story sooner or later.
Love this story! And- if you want to read something really creepy, read the book 'Unwind', if you get to the end you'll read some truly awful stuff.
I still haven't gotten an answer to how Celestia, Luna, and Discord died. They're immortal. They lived for over a thousand years. They can't just die. They can't even die of their own choice. They have to be killed. Unless this story is secretly implying that three committed suicide, I don't get how they can just die.
Also, how and why did the Elements move onto different bearers. You established in "The Alicorn King's Glare" that the Elements have to be handed down from one bearer to the next willingly. And seeing as this is the sequel, the Elements have to follow the same rules as they did in the AKG.
And do I even have to mention that in the AKG Glare said Shining Armor and Cadence were having a son, but now Flurry is a girl. Please explain this. Was Glare lying? Was he just wrong? Or is Flurry Heart transsexual? (That last one would make the story so much better.)
In other words, this story is riddled with plot-holes (pun not intended).
7289976
I don't think they died the way you're thinking of it, but they chose to pass on to somewhere else similar to how the elves from The Lord of the Rings did at the end.
Light, please correct me if I'm wrong.
I really am enjoying this!
I wish I could write as well as you do... But alas, I cannot.
7290049 So you're suggesting I was right about the suicide?
7289698 If you know how to edit, that would help.
7289745 Me.
7289976 Okay. Let's take this point by point!
1) Yes, they can in fact just die. As Star Swirl said "When an eternal's time comes, they can either walk out or be dragged." Ready to rest and pass on the kingdom, they walked out.
2) No, for the full POWER of the elements to be unlocked they have to be passed on. When new bearers are born the elements pass to the new bearers, with the final confirmation being The Passing of The Torch.
3) Yeah, that one is just on me. I finished AKG well before the Season 6 premiere, I assumed we wouldn't get a kid for a few more seasons, and I took a stab in the dark. Just assume Star Swirl was trying to be impressive, but ended up making a dope of himself. Not entirely out of character for what I've written.
7290049 Essentially. Yeah.
7290247 You never know until you try! Trust me, I'm not all that good of a writer. I just rip off a lot of better people and mix them into a slurry to trick readers into thinking I'm talented.
7290335 No! Its more mystic and pretty than that!
7290590 I have some counterpoints actually.
1. Starswirl described immortals as 'Eternals', am I not wrong? By definition 'eternal' means 'lasting forever', therefore Celestia, Luna, and Discord are beings that last forever (don't give me the whole "They'll always be there in your heart" as a counter-counterpoint to this). And so, an immortal creature's time to die can not come, unless they are killed by another creature of equal/greater power to them or by themselves.
2. You just agreed with me on how the Elements are passed down. This isn't a counterpoint, I just wanted to mention it.
3. It doesn't matter how mystic and pretty it. If Celestia, Luna, and Discord are willing to give up their mortality (which is the only way they can become able to die) and pass into the afterlife, that's suicide.
Checkmate.
Do you really have to prove everyone wrong?
Only when I want to be troll, yes.
You are so immature.
I know, Callie. I know.
7290905 In fantasy, Eternals can be killed (See Glare, very VERY dead) or ascend to heaven. See LOTR. Matter of Fact, I NEVER said the word "died," they "took their leave." They "departed." Almost as if they were called away by some higher power.
7290987
Damn, I am LOVING Scratch as a villain!
Also: DAMN PUMPKIN, YOU SCARY!
7290987 It doesn't matter how you wrote it. I'm still right.
Celestia, Luna, and Discord are beings that live forever, unless some exterior force causes them to lose their immortality (in Glare's case, the Elements of Harmony). Of course, they can also take their own lives by choosing to lose their immortality and then committing suicide.
And that is the only way they could have died. Their immortality has to be removed because by definition (and I'm quoting Dictionary.com here) immortal means "not mortal; not liable or subject to death; undying."
Checkmate
Bill and Ted: EXCELLENT!! *air guitar riff*
You're well read? Okay, how about this: In a world were everything, even weather, emotions, and color, has been eradicated for the purpose of Sameness, one boy with an amazing gift is taught how to see beyond thanks to the assistance of an old man with the same gift.
It's not too great of a summary, but it's pretty close. Also, this is easily my favorite dystopian novel, though the movie is a lot better.
I don't know what the book is, but I might want to read it. Either way, I enjoyed the chapter! Looking forward to more as always!
(that's not to mean you should rush the next chapter, of course, you should take your time writing so that it's the best it can be!)
I just had a thought. If pushed to his limits, what would Scratch be capable of? I want to know because I'm pretty sure I have made a character that can top him easily, and I want her to know she has some competition.
Gently you say? I know not the meaning of the word...
I detect a Brütal Legend reference.
That last scene with Rarity and Scratch reminded me of this, almost:
ya know I like this guy. he's a very good villian. and I already know his real name. its in the Title.