To all the world it looked as though Raindrops had been shocked into a catatonic state, the only motion left in her body being the steady wing beats holding her aloft. In actuality she was counting slowly backwards from '10' under her breath, while silently offering up a prayer that the moon might grant her the patience not to strangle the pair of guffawing idiots rolling about on the cloud in front of her. As her count down reached the number '4' she pegged her odds of self-restrain at about fifty-fifty.
As Rainbow Dash and her griffin cohort continued to laugh Raindrops stomped over towards them, an impressive display considering she was still hovering a few dozen feet in the air.
"Whoa, Dash, I think your friend here might be mad," came the nonchalant voice of the griffin.
Raindrops fumed as she locked eyes with the half-eagle half-lion, "oh we've already left mad behind, try furious," she answered in a forcibly calm tone.
"Lighten up Drops," chimed Rainbow Dash as she hopped from her perch and glided between the two, "it was just a joke." Dash let out a last few chuckles as she smiled, but Raindrops only stared back sternly. "Anyhow, Drops, I'd like you to meet my griffin friend ──"
"Gilda," Raindrops interrupted flatly.
"Aw, you've heard of me," the griffin responded with a somewhat sarcastic sounding croon as she stroked a talon through the loose feathers atop her head, "I'm flattered."
"After the fuss Rarity was making this morning, I'm rather sure everypony in town has heard of you."
"Heheh, yeah, that was pretty funny," chuckled Rainbow Dash, "Don't know how she figured out it was us though?"
"Given that you showed up with your friend here at her boutique last night just before closing, professing that you had finally given into your marish desires and were ready to let Rarity give you a full fashion makeover, which of course she immediately dropped everything to do, what with how she's always fancied what she could do with all those colors of yours. Then at near the crack of dawn she comes storming through the downtown streets, wrapped head to toe in a trench coat and scarf, practically beating down the spa door to demand an emergency full body treatment. What did you two do to her anyway?"
"Nothing much, just replaced her fancy bodywash with grape jelly," Dash snickered, "and that fashion snob deserved to get knocked down a peg or two anyway, especially after what she put me through while I was distracting her so Gilda could make the switch. I was stuck there for over an hour trying on all her dresses."
Gilda seemed to make quite the effort of suppressing a new set of her own snickers at being reminded of her friend's distress. "Aw, but I thought they made you look quite, dashing!" With that she broke into a full fit of uncontrolled laughter.
"Yeah, yeah," moaned the multi-hued pegasus, "Laugh it up before I shut you up."
The image of her boss dressed up in all the finest Carousel Boutique had to offer briefly made Raindrops forget how angry she was trying to be. The accompanying image of the shop's proprietor staring into her bathroom mirror, shocked horror plastered on her face at the sight of her normally pristine white coat stained with thick purple patches was almost as distracting, "Okay maybe, but did the rest of the town deserve to have to put up with two hours of whining at a pitch so intense that it ensured no pony within a three block radius could sleep in?"
"Meh, a little lost sleep never hurt anypony."
Raindrops blinked as her brain struggled to process how Rainbow Dash of all ponies could say that with a straight face. "Right... Well now that I've found you, I think it's about time I got you to the back to the patrol station so you can start making up that shift you missed yesterday."
"About that..." started Dash in a disturbingly calm tone, "See the way I figure it I've got about three days of vacation time saved up, so I was planning on just taking the rest of today and tomorrow off, then float my weekend break to the day after. That'll see me through to the end of Gilda's visit"
Raindrops could already feel the veins in her forehead fighting to break free again. "You're supposed to clear schedule changes like that a full week in advance, preferably two," she forced out between tightly clenched teeth.
"I did," she answered with the widest most obnoxious grin imaginable plastered across her face, "I got full approval from the weather captain herself."
Gilda snickered.
The sound of her own heart beat echoed repeatedly through Raindrops head. Her eyes narrowed, a rage clearly building to a boil, rising up and into her throat as she bellowed, "You know that's not how things work when you are the weather captain!"
"Yeah, yeah," Dash droned as she waved off the technicality, "Take it up with the weather captain, when she gets back from her vacation," and with that she was off, quick as her namesake.
Gilda was close behind, but twisted midair for a single flap to offer up a mock salute, "Smell ya' later, Dropsy."
Raindrops repeated her earlier countdown, though this time giving herself significantly worse than the fifty-fifty odds of her first. She was broken from her exercise in self-restraint as she reached the number '3'.
"Hey! If you're quite done up there, do you think you could come back down so I can finish going over the routine," Trixie called out from bellow.
"Are you serious?!"
"Quite, I need to make sure everything is as exciting as possible."
Raindrops simply stared for a beat then let out in a huff, "Why don't you try throwing a knife at somepony's face!" With that she flew off to the weather patrol station to see just how much shift juggling Rainbow's impromptu vacation was going to require, while she muttered to herself, "I know that would excite me right about now."
What Raindrops never saw was Trixie raise a hoof to her chin in contemplation, "That just might work."
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Ponyville Elementery. Young students sat at their desks in front of trays of sopping sticky goo and strips of thinly sliced paper. At the front of the room paced a plum colored mare, baring a trio of smiling flowers on her flank, currently engaged in a lecture on the finer points of papier-mâché. As Miss Cheerillee turned to the black board to write out the latest keyword for her class, Rainbow Dash poked her head up outside the open window, a straw held between her hooves that she immediately blew into before ducking back out of sight.
The wad of wet paper flew through the air, striking a young colt in the back of the neck. Suddenly jerked to full alertness, the colt turned his head, only to see one of his classmates lazily running a single strip of paper back and forth in a tray of glue. Not to be taken for a pushover, the colt grabbed one of his own strips of paper, soaked it in the tray, then crumpled it up and hurled it at his presumed assailant.
The classmate was struck across the side of the face. He glared in stunned surprise at the snickering colt in front of him, and then proceeded to return the favor. A quick dodge though and the wad instead struck the filly just beyond.
By the time Cheerille turned back around the class room was a flurry of commotion as fillies and colts flung the supplies of their arts and craft lesson at each other.
"That's enough of that my little ponies, settle down," she chimed with only the barest hint of frustrated harshness as she ducked a rogue projectile. When the class showed no signs of heading the request, she repeated with somewhat more forced authority, "Ehem! That's quite enough now. We've all had our fun, but ──" She was cut off as another rogue, and rather large, wad of gooey paper that she wasn't quite fast enough for was abruptly plastered across her face.
With slow deliberate motion the teacher reached up with a single hoof, clearing away the mess and revealing eyes that weren't nearly so infinitely patient as usual.
A pair of birds where happily chirping in a tree outside the schoolhouse when, "I SAID, THAT'S ENOUGH!!!"
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A sea green unicorn mare made to enter a candy shop when, she suddenly found herself spun about in a whirl as a flash of colors whizzed past her. She staggered about, her eyes still spinning in their sockets when, WHAM, something large brown and feathery slammed into her.
"Hey watch where I'm flyin' why don't'cha!" a rather gruff and irritated voice called as it too sped away.
Lyra picked herself up off the ground dazed and dizzy as she thought to herself how rude some ponies, or whatever that thing had just been, could be. Dusting herself off as she regained her bearings, Lyra proceeded about her original business as she stepped though the still open door.
"Hey BonBon, I was wondering..." Lyra's golden eyes scanned the room. Two customers had just left, but the musician could see no sign of the shop's cream coated owner.
"Up here," she heard that most familiar voice call out, though it lacked any of its usual honey.
The unicorn's eyes slowly rose up, where to her stunned astonishment she saw Bonbon, the mare's curly blue and pink locks permeated by some sticky substance plastering her to the ceiling.
"How, how did you...?"
"Don't ask," came the earth pony's indignant reply, "now why don't you stop staring slack jawed and use some of that fancy magic to. Get. Me. Down!"
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The gray coated mailmare cantered merrily down her route in her bright blue uniform with satchels stuffed full of letters slung over her sides. Her bright yellow eyes roamed about her surroundings, seeming to take in everything but the path directly in front of her, yet she never faltered a step.
She came to a stop and opened the mailbox in front of her, but before she could reach into her bag her eyes seemed to roll into a focused forward alignment as her brows furrowed in curiosity. She reached into the box, and pulled from it a small hive. Its tiny occupants buzzed about her outstretched hoof but none seemed to make a motion to sting the gentle mare.
"Aw, I love it when ponies leave me gifts," she smiled, "and Dinky will be so glad to have some fresh honey to go with dinner tonight."
The pegasus then stretched out a single wing and balanced the hive lightly atop it. She then proceeded to finish delivering the kind pony's mail, before turning to continue her route.
In a nearby tree sat a rather disappointed and bepuzzled griffin alongside her pegasus cohort.
"See, I told you there was no point in trying to prank Derpy," Dash said with an exasperated sigh, "that mare is just too vapid to realize what's going on."
Gilda shrugged, "Yeah I guess so. Come on lets go see if we can find some actual fun," and with that the pair flew off to find their next victim.
Ditzy Doo merrily continued down the road, one eye fixed ahead, as the other tracked a pair of unaware would-be pranksters as they flew away.
────────────────────────────────
"Thanks again for helping me get today's stock to market." said the golden coated earth pony mare with the curly orange mane.
Raindrops was happy enough to help her friend retrieve a supply of vegetables. Carrot Top had even promised her a few of her signature namesakes as compensation. Not that such a reward was strictly necessary, but after the less than satisfactory meal she'd had yesterday in exchange for helping a friend, the pegasus found it reassuring that she'd actually get something edible this time.
As the pair approached the shed where Carrot Top stored her goods Raindrops hoof sank into a mud puddle. Lifting it back up to stare briefly with a furrowed brow, she then slowly craned her head, eyes scanning left and right across the cloudless sky. Without having even given it much thought the experienced weathermare had spread her wings wide, feeling the air around her. There was a rather unusual amount of humidity in the immediate area, but why? Her eyes drifted back down to the ground, where more patches of mud dotted the surrounding path, growing ever more concentrated as one approached the ──
"Wait! Carrot Top don't open ──"
The warning came too late, as no sooner had the farmer begun to lift the latch than the shed's doors flung open drowning the two mares in a sudden torrent of water.
Moments later as the two came to their senses some dozen feet from where they had been standing, coughing up water and thoroughly coated in the freshly made muddy slurry that was now all around them, a steady sound came to their ears, that of raucous and guffawing laughter.
Carrot Top hardly seemed to notice staring about in a dazed confusion, but Raindrops already had her eyes focused sharply at the base of a nearby tree, just outside of the flood's path.
Raindrops rose, her eyes narrowed and full of vengeance. She began to stomp her way over to commence teaching a rather harsh lesson, only to slip and fall face first into the fresh mud sliding to halt not too far from her intended quarry. Though caked in mud, her eyes contained no less fury as she glared up at the source of her ire.
Without even rising again she hissed, "You are so dead Rainbow Dash."
Rainbow Dash wheezed a bit as she fought to choke out a reply through her fits of laughter, "Gee Drops ... it's not like ... I meant to prank you twice ... even I know not to take a joke that far."
Raindrop's eye twitched as she finally managed to get her hooves steady beneath her. That might have just been the closest thing she had ever heard from Rainbow Dash that even remotely resembled an honest and sincere apology, and it was directed at her. Not at Carrot Top, to whom they had recklessly inflicted who knows how much property damage while nearly drowning the poor mare in the process. No, instead it was directed at Raindrops who'd received no more than a brief fright the day before and a little bit of accidental water logging due to nothing more than her proximity to the true victim in all of this. It was in that moment that she realized just how silly yesterday's anger at the pair had been. This, this was true fury, and she was about to unload it all over their sorry flanks.
Rainbow Dash seemed to remain oblivious of the erupting inferno building within the jasmine pegasus. Gilda, however, seemed to have a better clue of what was just about to go down. Her eyes locked briefly with Raindrops' own. The two glared defiantly, as if each were daring the other to make the first move until, "Uh, Dash," the griffin squeaked as she tapped her cohort's shoulder, "I think we best beat wing before things get ugly."
The pegasus speedster seemed to only stare confusedly at her griffin friend, until finally turning to take note of the expression chiseled into Raindrops face. She gulped, "Well then, guess we'll just um... bye."
The pair of pranksters were off in a flash, barely more than a brown blur and a chromatic streak, as they darted rapidly about the sky. They probably thought themselves to be cleverly shaking off any would-be pursuit. They clearly did not understand the nature of the fury they had brought upon themselves.
With a force that seemed to make the very earth tremble, Raindrops leapt into air. She knew she could never keep pace with the rapidly fleeing speedsters, but she also knew she didn't have to. Sooner or later they'd get tired, or bored, then they would set down to rest, probably start planning their next act of vandalism disguised as humor, and that would be when Raindrops would pounce. No, she didn't need to keep pace, just fly true and steady, never letting the zigzagging pair out of sight. So let them run; it will only make them all the easier to handle when I catch them, she thought as visions of violence danced in her head.
"Wait!" she heard Carrot Top call out from below.
The now embodiment of righteous fury slowed her ascent, but kept her eyes sharply focused on the rapidly fleeing pranksters, "No! Don't you dare try and talk me out of this," she shouted, "those two have been asking for this and it's about time someone taught them a lesson."
"It's not that," came the reply, "I need your help right now. If we don't get this mess dried out fast my whole stock will be ruined."
Raindrops was torn. If she left now, she could keep sight of her quarry until the pair eventually set down for a breather, but was any pay back, no matter how deserved, worth her friend's livelihood? True, it was the thoughtless prank that had caused this particular crisis in the first place, but what kind of friend would Raindrops be if she left while there was still a chance to salvage the situation?
"Fine!" she let out with an exasperated sigh, as she turned and descended back to the ground. She gave one last glance over her shoulder as the paired streaks vanished into distant specks. Raindrops whispered to herself in a muttered growl, "You can run Rainbow Dash, but you can't hide."
Adding to favorites... but I will read later. Sorry.
DAAAAASH! that griffon is a BAD influence.
I can't wait to see where this goes.
Also I suggest you get a proofreader to help out, there's a few typo here or there. It's 'route' not 'rout' and 'fury' not 'furry'. For exemple.
Wow. Dash's pranks are alot more dickish in this universe.
Raindrops needs to layeth the smacketh down upon Gilda.
Chaos and Mayham abounds... I guess this shows the difference of Dash/Gilda pranking vs Dash/Pinkie pranking.
This is the first lunaverse fic to really show Raindrops implied 'attitude issues' and though justified things could definitely get ugly. Trixie is tertiary thus far because she hasn't be pranked and thus not really her problem, easy to see... at least until the complaints start to roll in and the forms pile up haha. Also it's good that Ditzy's 'friend to all' aura includes bees... that one could have been nasty. Good work capturing the universe thus far.
655981
Yeah, I'm all too aware that I should get a proofreader, even went over to the main proofing group to look into the matter, but their system of pick a name off a giant list and start asking/begging is a bad system for me. I don't do so well making arbitrary decisions like that or at making requests of perfect strangers, even if they are openly asking people to do just that. I could have easily spent the next three or so days trying to invent criteria on which to base a choice, than another day or two working up the nerve to actual ask, and well like I said I was really feeling the need to just get this thing published while the motivation in me was still strong. Anyway, fixed those two typos.
656164 656332
The dickish pranks were basically the main premise that this fic grew out of. In the show it was Pinkie Pie who taught Dash that a good prank is one where the prankee laughs just as much as the pranker, so in a world where they were never friends and where Gilda gets to be the role-model such as it were, well things don't go nearly so well. Raindrops became the obvious focus character based on the events of LNLD; her frustrations with Dash's slacking and her later threats to "murder" Trixie over the whole weather mercenaries incident.
Also glad to see the prank on Ditzy seems to be going over well enough. That to me was the weakest part of the montage. I knew I wanted her to walk away unscathed and seeming unaware, both to frustrate the pranksters and to show off that she's possibly all too used to such attempts, but coming up with the actual prank was rough.
Let me see if I can find...
Ah, here we go.
marcamos.com/ha/this-is-gonna-be-good.gif
I've been looking forward to a Raindrops story, and you seem to have a good grasp on her personality. While reading I could feel the anger just beneath the surface, and I'm going to admit to being surprised that chapter 2 didn't begin with Ponyvile's population having decreased by one (or at least begin in a hospital with Gilda, Dash, and Raindrops all getting patched up).
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LOL, that image. Well now that I've got the lord almighty of the Lunaverse setting up his own personal throne in the front row I guess I'm obligated to deliver. Anyway, thanks for confirming that I'm on something of the right track with Raindrops persona. That was definitely a part that worried me and kept me double guessing whether I was making her out to be too much of a barely restrained rage-oholic or giving her too much self-control and letting the other characters walk all over her.
As for the lack of murder/hospital, there wouldn't be much story to tell if we skipped right to the payoff. Though I did consider adding an imagine spot, when she snapped during the Carrot Top incident, where Raindrops brutally eviscerates the pranksters and baths in their blood (well not quite that extreme) along with an imaginary Pinkie Pie then proceeding to lead the entire town in a joyous chorus of Ding-Dong the Bitch is Dead and wrapped up with the mayor presenting Raindrops the official "Prize Pony of Ponyville" award.
657346
There needs to be a picture of that.
656469
Ah, my. At least Rainbow Dash is consistent in that she totally fails to understand Ditzy in this timeline as well. Dashie'll never, EVER get it but Ditzy can read her like a cheap novel; she won't do anything about it because she doesn't resent her (much) and knows that a certain jasmine-colored melee Pegasus will deal with the idiot post haste.
How did I not notice the second chapter on my first reading? Oh well!
This is great! The string of pranks is cleverly written, and I really, really loved the bit with Ditzy Doo and the bees. Ditzy does have an awful lot of patience.
If you want a proofreader, why not ask in the Lunaverse group itself? I'm sure somepony would be willing to help. I'd be willing to proofread, but I couldn't guarantee how quickly I could get through a chapter.
Rainbow, you bitch.
Kick her ass, Raindrops!
*Hands Raindrops a modified shotgun* Here, for your hooves.
Man, those were some nasty pranks. And yeah, as others have said, keeping in line with how Dash would be without Pinkie Pie to hold her back.
About the only thing that might get RD to see reason is seeing Gilda prank one of Ditzy's friends:
Were that to happen, she'd join the melee Pegasus in dismantling her pal.
671915 Ah, café food, where you pay 8 dollars for 8 grams. It's a shame that yuppies only dine somewhere if there's a wine list.
...Okay, now I'm starting to rant here.
"Okay maybe, but did the rest of the town deserve to have to put up with two hours of whining at a pitch so intense that it insured no pony within a three block radius could sleep in?"
ensured. Resuming now.
671959
Well it's also still ponyville, which is still something of a backwater nowhere town, so I'd imagine that the cost to weight ratio is probably a little more favorable. Aslo, while the café is [i[Fancy, I don't think it's anywhere near the crème de la crème of the Ponyville dinning scene such as it were. Upscale, probably , but certanly not top of the line.
If this takes place before "I for Impossible," Maybe the knife-at-face trick could be the one Trixie practices on Moondancer.
At the front of the room paced a plumb colored mare
Take out the 'b'
A see green unicorn mare, made to enter a candy shop when, she suddenly found herself spun about in a whirl as a flash of colors whizzed past her.
Sea, and the commas are unnecesary.
Ditzy Doo merrily continued down the road, one eye fixed ahead, as the other tracked a pair of unaware would be pranksters as they flew away.
Awesome, and while this isn't as big a deal as the others, I'd recommend adding dashes between the selected words, IE "unaware would-be-pranksters" Also, second comma is unnecesary.
Not at Carrot Top, too whom they had recklessly inflicted who knows how much property damage while nearly drowning the poor mare in the process.
To, and maybe add a comma between 'damage' and 'while'
Her eyes locked briefly with Raindrops own.
This is a tough grammar thing, but when a proper noun ends with an 's,' simply add the apostrophe to the end of the word: Raindrops'
The pair of pranksters where off in a flash
Were
They probably thought themselves to be cleverly shaking off any would be pursuit. They clearly didn't understand the nature of the fury they had brought upon themselves.
Not vital, but perhaps merge these two with a semicolon in between, (pursuit; they) rewording the start of the second, (pursuit, clearly not understanding) or something along those lines.
probably start planning there next act of vandalism
Their
So let them run, it will only make them all the easier to handle when she catches up.
Maybe insert 'she' between 'so' and 'run,' replace the comma with a semicolon, and make the other two past tense.
she heard Carrot Top call out from bellow
Below
The now embodiment of righties fury slowed her ascent,
Maybe replace 'now' with 'new?' I dunno, that whole phrasing is a bit awkward. Also, righteous.
but was any pay back, no matter how deserved, worth her friend's livelihood.
Replace period with a question mark, and maybe add 'well' between 'how' and 'deserved.'
but what kind of friend would Raindrops be if she left while there was still a chance to salvage the situation.
Ditto.
Sorry to nitpick; aside from the grammar issues, this was another great chapter! I loved the prank montage in particular. :)
672055
Fixed
672086
That was the idea, though when I wrote the line it more specifically referred to the trick as seen in Boast Busted, but since that's what she's practicing for with Moondance, same difference more or less.
672223
More fixed. Think I got those all, except were intentionally left for stylistic purposes, and thank you very much. Don't put yourself down for nitpicking. I asked for as much and I'm glad someone finally took me up on it. Help like this could earn you first reading privileges when Chapter 3 is closer to done.
672894 I think the knife trick has pretty much become a running joke in the Lunaverse. XD Like a reverse Noodle Incident.
Really? I'll try to be as helpful as I can!
<(LOL! Destroying peoples' livelihoods is fun!)
Lunaverse RD could use an arrow to the face.
NOT THE BEES!
You can't pull a fast one on Ditz, RD.
Some people just deserve a high five.
To the face.
With a chair.
2702320
Or with a cow prod.
Hm. I'm torn here. Rarity is one of my favorite characters and I simply hate to see her, and the other mane 6 we've seen, as bad ponies. Well not bad like Corona but...how do I put this? I think it's just because we're not getting the chance to get to se their good sides too. Or maybe since they never met Twilight they haven't learned anything about friendship? Idk, it just feels odd, hope you understand and aren't like offended or something I'm not trying to be rude.
That out of the way I DO love the Lunaverse. I do wish Octavia had a bigger role though, but I am enjoying this universe. It's so intriguing! I love these alternate universe type of stories but Lunaverse is becoming my favorite so far. Love these stories. Waiting for Coronas inevitable return. Can't help but wonder what Twilights doing in this story though. Probably a recluse.
2702320 I was gonna say...a high five with a hive.
Incidentally, that scene with the bees?
Crowning moment of awesome for dinky.
Quite a few paragraphs have excess spacing after "."s. Other than that don't remember most of this fic other than Dropsy makes a friend via face punching.
This is really good so far. And you really captured the similarities and differences of this universe and the show.
Yes, she's baring it but you probably mean "bearing"