"SONNOVABITCHSONNOVABITCHSONNOVABITCHSONNOVABITCHSONNOVABITCH." BOING?! I land and bounce off of mattresses stacked on top of each other and somehow land upright. 10 points biotch! Take the win formation proudly holding arms up and pointer fingers extended. Immediately I get glomped by non other than the infamous, cup-cake making, 4th wall breaking, possible speed using Pinkie Pie.
"I LOVE DOGGIES!!! OH YOUR SO CUTE! I'm going to love him, and care for him, and call him... wait, I already have Gummy. Oh well... GoodBYE Mr. Doggie, and take cover." SHIT! I dodge a falling plant only to get crushed by a piano. By now, I should really get a universe troll counter. I spend the next couple of minutes prying the splinters out of my muzzle while checking for concussive brain damage and organ rupture.
'Nothing except the splinters, and no brain damage-amage-amage-amage. Uh-oh...'
By this time I'm too tired to think anymore so I decide to try and get a bed for tonight. Map, GUIDE ME! Possible snoozing spots are Sweet apple acres, meh, Sugar Cube Corner, Fuq No!, The library, does Twilight even sleep, or drop and deal with it in the morning.
'Hmm... *GASP* I have an Idea*
I crawl to the Top of the barn at Sweet Apple Acres and decide to sleep there.
"So how was your second day of being exposed to a carefree society." Hmm, I had to think about that one.
1)Shot a stallion out of a hole in the ground
2)Fought a Dragon
3)Getting shot out of a cannon
5)Discovering the stuff I have in Hammerspace
6)Discovering I look damn sexy in fur
7)Gave a Funeral to a Dragon
8)Conducted the Canterlot Symphony for a Day
9)Met the princesses, kinda dull for a first impression, second impression, ALL BETS GO TO SHIT!
11)Wrote a letter to the princesses while swagfalling
"Fahking AWESOMESAUCE!" I drop into sleep from fatigue.
I wake up the next morning to a 140 decible Dubstep alarm and accidently fall off the barn. 'Oh SHIT!' faceplants hurt more when you have a muzzle.
"There's only one pony I know with the capacity to be a city wide alarm clock." I walk the 1.2 miles to Vinyl and Octavia's House. I pull out some 'provisions' and set them up infront of the door, crank the turbo bass to 12, grab a drink of Marester, and knock loudly. Vinyl opens the door just as the song hits the 54 second mark.
"FIRE!" Vinyl Counters with techno. "Let's SPIN THIS SHIT!"
"Are you Fahking Kiddin me!?" The street vibrates from the wubs. THE BRO ARMY SHALL COMETH!
"HEEEEYEYEYEEYEYEYYEEYEYE MYAYAYYAYAYYAYA VOICE SOUOUOUOUONDS FUNUUNUNUNY." Pinkie Pie shakes across the vibrations.
"ALRIGHT BABE Let's DO THIS!" suddenly Octavia Appears, violin and cello at the ready.
'So she took my advice...'
"DROP IT! BASS CANNON LEVEL 13!" There can be only One! I put on my headphones for this one. The ground starts to fissure as eardrums pop, a dubstep battle like never before. OH THE WUBS!
"WILL YOU GUYS TURN IT DOWN! I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!" Rarity becomes the one to intervene and smashes the equipment with one of her manequins.
"Awww.............." I sigh with depression. Vinyl Scratch walks up to the setup I had.
"Wow, even your own bass cannon huh? Let's party sometime, catcha later." Oh well, it had to end sometime...
"So," Discord finally taking the earbuds out, "Is that how you start off every morning."
"No, not really, I usually just wake up to classical music, then eat breakfast, then try something new." We were lying on the grass, watching the clouds go by. I liked the smell of fresh air, a power that few could come by, "So, I've only glanced at this world from mine, what was your 'New Ponyville' Like?"
"Oh, it was wonderful, Raining chocolate, working Pimsleur staircases, the very pique of random nonsense. All at my very fingertips." Apparently reminiscence was all he could really do.
"Let me guess, other ponies couldn't handle the change overnight and started working against you to get things back to the way they were?" Discord nodded, "Man, you just described revolution in a G setting. You see, the nature of things is only small steps of change at a time, gradually so that nothing becomes a giant leap to adapt. Same thing with people, er, ponies. Change everything in less than a millisecond and things become too much to absorb and process, and you've immediately got backlash, attempts to change things back to the way they were before anyone realizes what the hell happened in the first place. Overdramatism leads to failure. In Sun Tzu's 'Art of War', he describes how important it is to know yourself before heading into anything. Take care to know your limits, as well as find what makes you, well, you. Many of the things you described in your 'New Ponyville' were actually good ideas, I mean, seriously CHOCOLATE RAAAAAAAIN!!!" had to do it, "There might have actually been other ponies that liked the chaos that ensued, but it was just to much for the rest, now you're stuck in stone."
"...again..." Say what now? "I've been stuck in stone before, my gosh the time ticking away the hours and the days and the years, what a nightmare, so I broke out. That ended badly, so then I pondered what other realms had elements of chaos, and your's fit the bill, thing was..."
"...You described it as TOO chaotic, unable to actually make a change."
"Now look who can read minds..." Discord ponted out.
"Actually, before all this, I did many things, a voyeuristic lifestyle, doing anything and everything, arts, sciences, literature, mathematics, etc. Some talents caught on really well, for example, analyzing. When we first met you applauded me for being able to bring chaos to a much too chaotic world. Analyzing your speech showed you couldn't do what I did, because it was more than you ever dreamed of. I'm also skilled at demolitions and pyrotechnics." I tried to pull a cute smirk.
"So, were you and the princesses ever friends?" Prying into personal ground here, let's watch.
"Once, of course, we got into spats and things because of the massive differences in personality. But among other things we had a lot in common: Celestia and I were both into pranks, I more than she."
"I'm wondering how you would beat shooting someone out of a cannon." Thinking back to how both Celestia and I both did the same thing, except the whole 'on the moon' thing. Which reminds me, "Hey, are wolves able to use magic?"
"Why, yes, but on a stranger degree, I used to research how they did certain things, like your concept of 'Hammerspace' that you showed me earlier, but other things as well. While unicorns and alicorns used magic through their horns, wolves also had the ability, through their words and will." This piqued my interest.
"Oh? So, By words, the actual meaning go into play, and by will, the intent or effect given to those words." Remembering the instances of the use of my voice.
"So why did the wolves become extinct?" Interested in the story Celestia told me.
"They were divided amongs themselves, Isolated, they never spoke again, simply howled at the moon during the night." Discord said it as if he genuinely had no idea what happened, curious...
"So Technically, I'm the last wolf, and able to use magic just by using my voice?"
"Consider yourself, what was it you said... one with the voice?" he held back a snicker, "The only drawback is that it requires one of two requirements, a large inhale before the release of the spell, or an incredulous amount of drain on stamina, which is why it was so taxing on you after the battle, you could barely stand up after the funeral."
"You took all that time researching? Well, knowledge can be a powerful catalyst for just about anything."
"So can a drive or reason, Wouldn't you agree? Which kind of makes me wonder, what gave you the ability to enjoy chaos as much as I did?"
"I'm not sure," I thought about it, back tracking to when I was... ow... why does my head hurt when I try to remember when I was... when I was... when I was...........
I woke up at the hospital two hours later face-to-face with none other than 4th-wall-breaker Pinkie.
"HI there! Remember me? I'm the one who gave you a hug after you jumped off that matress. I found you outside Ponyville on the grass and you weren't moving, So i tried dumping a bucket of water on you, that didn't work either, so then I finally got you to the hospital..." I simply glanced at her and closed my eyes again... "I got you some pudding!" I dropped off into dream land...
"Discord, can I use magic even when I'm subconscious?" I needed to hurry...
"You should be able to, why?" He seemed rather concerned, "It's not everyday I talk in someone's dreams."
"Sanctuarium Meum! (My Sanctuary)!" I needed to get away...
"You know you're going to feel this when you wake up."
"I don't care, Listen Discord, remember when you asked me what was my drive for chaos?"
"I will explain... *pain* later."
Love your sister, she loves you too...