Epilogue
Trixie, Ditzy, Dinky, Raindrops, Silver Script and Bonbon watched as Pinkie Pie, Lyra and Blues Noteworthy led a parade of parasprites past the post office and down to the Everfree Forest. Pinkie and Blues had a harness strapped to their backs with about a half-dozen instruments attached, while over twenty instruments floated around Lyra. The six observers bobbed their heads or stomped their hooves to the beat as they went past.
Trixie looked down the road back to Ponyville. “I think they got all the little pests,” she said. “We'll have to do a few more sweeps with the band, but we should be all right. Keep your pads crossed.” She looked to Silver Script. “I'll make sure to mention you in my report to Princess Luna.” A smile crossed her mouth. “Thanks.” She looked to everyone there. “Could have been a lot worse without everyone's help.”
Ditzy looked back at the post office and up at the her apartment. “They ate almost all the food,” she said, one eye drifting down to Dinky.
Dinky drew herself up. “I'm not hungry, Mommy!” she declared. Her stomach rumbled and she slumped down. “Honest, not hungry at all...” She patted her barrel. “Really not hungry...”
Trixie spoke up. “You can raid the contents of my fridge to your heart's desire, Ditzy. As far as I know, the Residency was locked up during this.” She shrugged as everyone there looked to her. “It's Pokey's day off. Said something about a diamond-tipped file he was eyeing.” She shook her head. “I guess it makes sense.”
Bonbon spoke up. “The Confectionarium was shut up before any of them got inside, so I can definitely lend you some food, Ditzy. Take what you need.”
Ditzy's mouth wavered slightly. She wiped her eyes with her foreleg. “Thank you. I swear I'll pay you both back for this.”
Trixie snorted and waved her off. “Dinky's help earlier was enough.” She looked down at the filly and nodded. “Good job, kiddo.” Her gaze drifted up and down the road to Ponyville proper. “Now I gotta figure out how much damage was caused by those little pests. How much food was eaten, property damage...” She let out a sigh. “So much paperwork. So little time.”
Silver Script glanced to his right and a small pile of empty mail bags. “Well, you can start with 'three new mail sacks'. No way in Tartarus I'm reusing those. The post office itself's fine, though. Maybe some heavy-duty cleaner for the walls and floor in some spots.”
Trixie shuddered slightly. “Top of the list, Silver Script.” She rubbed her chin. “Come to think of it, most of the food eaten was probably from the open-air stalls and personal food.” She shook her head. “I might have barely enough time to get ready for the Eventime Festival.”
Dinky's left foreleg shot up. “Oh, oh! I'll help, Miss Trixie!” She looked to Ditzy. “Can I help, Momma? Please?”
Ditzy patted her daughter on her back and withers. “After school is finished and your homework done, you can.” She looked to Trixie. “Just make sure she's home at a reasonable hour. She's still a growing filly.”
Raindrops watched the last of the parasprites disappeared down the road, her head bobbing up and down. “Gotta hoof it to you, Trixie. This could've turned out a lot worse than it did.”
Trixie turned and bowed deeply to her. “Why thank you, my dear Raindrops!” She reared up, tossing her forelegs back and letting her cape flutter about. “Was there ever any doubt?” She dropped back to all fours and held up a hoof. “And you know I'm joking!”
Raindrops bobbed her head a bit. “I know, just so long as you know, then fine.”
Trixie let out a small sigh. “Well, I'm heading back to the Residency. Much as I'm loathe to, I have to get started on the paperwork as soon as possible.” She looked to Ditzy and jabbed a foreleg at her. “I expect to see you there within the hour and with a lunch pail. I have plenty of kumquats and Tabasco sauce.” And with that, she trotted off.
The next morning had been rather hectic for Trixie, running around with a clipboard, quill and inkwell floating about as she interviewed various ponies about yesterday. Most of the debris from yesterday had either been cleaned up or was in the process of being taken care of.
Towards noon, Trixie made her way to Sugarcube Corner. She entered, finding Pinkie Pie behind the counter and finishing up a sale. Pinkie's head shot up at the jangling of the bell above the door. “Oh, hi,” she said, waving at Trixie. She glanced to the door leading to the back. “Do you need help with anything? I can get one of the Cakes' if you want.”
Trixie approached the counter, waving her off. “Not necessary,” she said. She sucked in a deep breath and blew it out before continuing. “I just want to say thanks for yesterday, for talking to us instead of over us.” She glanced away, looking at a tabletop with platters of wrapped cookies on them. “Although I guess the horseshoe can be on the other hoof when we don't listen to you and brush you off. I'm sorry about that, and I'll try to listen to you from now on.”
Pinkie stood at the counter for a moment before walking around right up to Trixie. “Thanks, Trixie. I'll try to listen to others instead of talking right over them, or talking over them, or brushing them off entirely.” She sighed. “Back at the rock farm, I didn't have anypony to talk to beyond Mom, Dad and my sisters. And they weren't exactly chatty. So out in the fields sometimes I'd just... talk. To nopony in particular.”
Trixie pursed her lips. “That explains... a lot, actually.”
The bell jingled again and some ponies walked in. Pinkie's ears perked up and she looked over. “Welcome to Sugarcube Corner!” She looked back to Trixie. “Back to work.” Her eyes widened slightly. “But I'm off at five o'clock. Can we get together then? To... talk?”
Trixie stepped back from the counter, allowing the others to step up to it. “And to listen,” she said, bowing her head and leaving.
An earth pony walked up to the gates of the Residency, towing a small wagon laden with tools and raw materials. He stopped at the entrance, cocking his head to the side.
The door opened and Pokey Pierce's head popped out. He looked to the earth pony. “Sorry, Windowpane. Everything's all right here.” He glanced to the side as Windowpane turned and walked off. “Well, can't break 'em all.”
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wow, the window survived for once...lets fix that!
Hmmm. An interesting ending. Heh. I should think that when the crossover goes online, will be the one horrified by her equivalent!!
Pretty good ending. Hilarious bit about the window at the end, that was great.
Ah Windowpane
Nice ending there RK! Lyra is just showing off there with her twenty instruments isn't she?
And another episode complete! Yay! 
Nice one. Too bad there is nopony around to write a friendship report about it.
[youtube=Ep21n38QaPI] CHIMMYCHERRYCHANGA!
So the "over twenty instruments" floating around Lyra's head...Were they all the same that Pinkie was trying to acquire for the song( a few harmonicas, A few banjos,Etc)?
Pokey failed to break the window! Obviously, the only option for him now is to teleport away in shame.
The contents of Trixie's fridge.....
What an end to the episode!
I love that you've basically made Pinkie almost one of them again. No longer that pony that everypony disregards.
Now there's even less reason for others to say the Lunaverse hates the Main Mane 6.
And now I wonder if the two Pinkies will meet during Crisis, and whether or not a) the Universes explode and b) they learn from each other.
My core temperature rose by a few degrees at the ending.
And a link to the closing credits. How quaint.
Well, the ending was kind of anticlimactic (other than the brief window gag). After how flat the last chapter was I was really hoping this story could go out on a bang. As I feared, the rather overt lack of poor communication kills seemed to pretty much kill all of the drama and tension of the original, but hay, at least you finished. So, congrats on that.
That sounds painful.
Might want to consider a different extremity.
1412759 That could work. Focus on someone outside their core group is always a good thing for me.
1423701 Well, once Pinkie was found and explained... that's about all she wrote.
1428439 No... the window is staying intact this time around. ;)
1428518 Thanks. I'm guessing... Pinkie will be horrified?
1428529 Thanks. Glad you liked.
1428747 lol, maybe I should've included that with Trixie.
1429163 Lyra was showing off.
1429267 Along with the parasprites, right?
1430037 God, I remember that meme... :D
1430593 Chapter two.
1431010 Yeah, that was one of the things I wanted to do. To show one of the Mane Six in a positive light and better off than the beginning.
1431102 That's... a good thing?
1431133 lol, thanks.
1432095 That was the point. ;) It's a deliberate aversion of 'poor communication kills' set up to end quickly once Pinkie spilled the beans. It's designed to be short, sweet and to the point. As for drama and tension... it's a pretty foregone conclusion Ponyville wouldn't be destroyed, considering where this is placed, a week before 'Boast Busted'. I'll change the second bit. Thanks!
1441141
I know it was deliberate aversion of 'poor communication kills'; you've consistently made that point abundantly clear with all the subtle of a freight train. The problem is you found no good driving mechanism to replace it. So despite featuring an attack by flying tribbles, the story really never has much of a plot dynamic: stuff happens, the characters respond to it (with no real stumbling blocks along the way), the day is saved, and nothing all that interesting ever happens. Even the obvious moral seemed rather forced instead of growing organically.
Just because the conclusion is forgone doesn't mean the way the characters get there has to be so straight forward and bland. There was never any challenge to this story. The heroes never had to do anything for themselves because Pinkie already had the answer. They didn't even have to work all that hard to find her, and despite being overly drawn out the scene where they convince her to explain was ultimately just kind of monotonous. It seemed like you spent so much focus and effort trying to 'fix' what went wrong the original, that you never came up with much of a story of your own to tell.
Maybe it's my fault; I had pretty high expectations for a story full of high octane zany antics, but the end result just feels forgettably mediocre.
1441292 Sometimes the straight path is the best path. That's the case, here. It's what Swarm would've been if the two sides had listened to each other. If Twilight had asked about parasprites or Pinkie had explained herself at the beginning, I made it clear that was what was going to happen.
1441395
True you did, but in the end I don't see how that makes this a story that was actually worth telling. Trope are not inherently a bad thing, and so far as I'm concerned all you did is prove how the show used the trope well (if Twilight had done any of what you suggested, there would NEVER have been any episode to begin with). To me at least this alternative is nothing more than an overly long exposition piece that keeps telling the importance of listening to others, but never really bothers to show why it is important.
As I said though maybe that's just me, and even at that I didn't find what you wrote bad, just boring. It's still well written on a purely technical standpoint and is in no way detrimental to the characters or the setting. You're free to continue trying to convince me otherwise if you like, but there is really no need. This is not something I am ever likely to raise a fuss about out sidethis comment thread. I'm glad you're proud of what you accomplished, and there is a fair amount to be legitimately proud of here. All I'm doing is explaining why I specifically ended up disliking this story, because I feel it would be unfair to down vote without explaining why.
1441512 Fair enough. For the most part I'll drop it.
But I still think I told a good story here. And I opened up a lot of possibilities with Pinkie Pie as well. 
1441141
yes, yes it is
1441395
It's like how a Lunaverse "Feeling Pinkie Keen" would be "Oh, yeah. She's a dowser. The old lady down the street from us was one too."
Sorry It talk so long for me to review but I had been away the last few months and am trying to catch up.
All in all. I liked this story. "Swarm of the century" my not be my favourite season one episodes it was still an enjoyable "spectacle" piece and I think you did a good job conveying that as well as giving a Lunaverse twist.
With this story being a spin on an episode, you went in knowing what direction this story was going to take. What I enjoyed about it was the extra bits that was thrown in. Seeing Silver Script (complete with bat
) have a leading role was great and despite it being alluded to at least a few times I think this is the only Lunaverse story I've seen that has Ditzy actually using her special talent in measuring air currents. We also got Trixie and Dinky spending time together which I really like because those two work well together.
I also liked the way the communication lesson was also handled. While Pinkie had been given a pass in the episode (probably on the grounds of it being Pinkie), it was pretty clear to everyone that Pinkie had also failed to communicate. The last couple of chapters handled Pinkie's backstory and situation well but didn't try to explain so much that we lose he part that makes Pinkie so much fun.
That last scene with WindowPane was also brillant.
Honestly, any weaknesses I could find in this story are inherently weaknesses in the story of the source episode itself. Swarm of Centurary didn't have the strongest story and at some points I felt my suspention of disbeleif stretched a couple of times but it was still fun seeing the the chaos snowball.
This story was enjoyable to read and I felt that all the ponies that took part were better off characterwise for you telling it.
Nicely done.
1449680 Well, thank you for actually getting what I was going for. I like to think I 'showed' the lesson about poor communication rather well, since this incident went a lot better than 'Swarm of the Century'. I set out to do that, and I did it. And yeah, Pinkie got cornered there.
Hmmm.....Seeing how quickly this got resolved makes me wonder if a Lunaverse version of the most recent episode would be equally short. I mean, all it'd take is for somepony grey to notice "This one looks depressed. She must be the real one." and it's back to the mirror pond with the clones.
So, Trixie actually befriended one of the would-have-been Mane 6.
The thing with Lunaverse Pinkie Pie is that she is apparently less popular than her counterpart but I am not sure why.
That was nice
It was definitely a different way to go about that episode and fits with the tone of the Lunaverse. You can read it and it almost comes off as a commentary of that episode and how the whole incident wouldn't have happened, or would have been much easier, had Pinkie Pie just explained everything from the start.
That being said, I honestly felt this story was tinged with tragedy: from Rarity actually being quite snobby, to Rainbow Dash lacking depth and having bad qualities for the sake of being ostensibly "cool", we've seen hints thus far of how different things are in this world. I wouldn't say that the Lunaverse is "less harmonic" then the Maneverse, but it's certainly a shade or two darker, and this story definitely shows it. Realistically, I could understand Trixie's objections and frustration with Pinkie Pie: she's the sort of comedic character that I love, but can completely understand why others just cannot stand her, and in a way, this story plays with that. Pinkie Pie's antics don't come off as funny, so much as just excessive, and though she wants to make everypony smile, the loss of the Mane-6 and the different route this world has gone through hasn't given Pinkie the support she needs.
That's not to say I didn't like this story, and Pinkie certainly grows up a little here. I just found it sad because, as Ditzy said, Pinkie means well. Unfortunately for her, her lack of friends to keep her in check, and the "darkness" of this world, means her songs and smiles tend to fall on deaf ears. Ultimately this episode, and this story, both show the same lesson (learning how to listen), but present it in completely different manners. I certainly enjoyed it for what it was worth: the jokes were funny from beginning to end, I love the particular focus on Trixie and Ditzy, and the hints on the upcoming festival.
Definitely a solid entry to this universe. Twilight and Applejack were the only ones thus far, who really haven't gotten attention yet, but their stories are right around the corner
.
Ahahaha, that end was AWESOME.
Think this is probably my favourite Lunaverse story so far. I've been reading them in chronological -- according to the group page -- order, so that might not say too much; but at the absolute least, it was thoroughly enjoyable. Loved your take on Pinkie Pie here.
I AM noticing a rather marked tendency in these stories to have the mane six display their worst charicteristics almost all the time. They still wind up being rated good stories though.
YOu gotta break em all! The Windows! Sorry, after that comment, a pokemon joke was inevitable.
Looks like Windowpane couldn't catch an even break.
Noteworthy's name is just http://mlp.wikia.com/wiki/Noteworthy.
________________
All in all, pretty decent L!Verse fic. Was my first time reading it, and all in all wasn't that bad.
5168782
Wow, you really collected a lot of data for that.
I thank you for you very complete analysis and reply.
2537808
I have a theory to that and it ties into something I like about the Lunaverse. See, this vere rememebers something important...we don't know how the civilians think of Pinkie. Now, you could say , "I would be friends with Pinkie" all you want, but that is you and you alone. Others might not see it that way, and that is what is going on here.
I have always said, Pinkie may be friends with everypony but the mane 6? Those five mares she loves as much as Maude? Those are her real friends. They see behind the curtain, they are what she can be herself around without the mask. Others will just see the outside, and...that is the problem with her. Say you act one way in front of people, but in front of family and alone, you act like a different person. Who knows you more and who would think more about you? Yeah. We see that side of her, but others do not. Trixie and the L6 see her as the party pony and think "nah."
However, this leads to something else. See, the double swor comes in expecations. Twilight expected Pinkie to act one way (and to be honest I was with Twily on this) and Pinkie was expecting them to understand her. On the other end, Ditzy has her expectation and when Pinkie denies that expecation...that becomes reason to pause an consider. Trixie, is the normal one and somepony that would have a normal reaction to Pinkie's...Pinkyness.
The message of communication is still here and the message of understanding is flowing through, but it is in a differnet way that it doesn't hurt the narrative. But most importantly... I love the mentor/big sis relationship between Dinky and Trixie.
I know that you have placed it on the blog and such...but it is tradition for me to place the first chapter of each live read on the story when I am finished.
7063406
If you mean this?
static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/11112/111120378/4623216-8156466426-725c3.jpg
Then yes. Trixie has Batman Prep Time Ability. Plus she has magic. Which makes her slightly at this level of Batman:
static.comicvine.com/uploads/original/10/101578/1867286-btw.jpg
5334090
so youre saying you dont like pinkie
7178955
Nope, I love her. But, a general populace might get annoyed. See Cranky
7179684
Then you have to take into account that this AU is tons different than M!Verse. In both how the bearer's got their CM's, how society opperates, and tons of other little things. Sure a lot of big, impactful stuff happened. But in other areas they veered in totally different ways. So while M!Verse Pinkie learned to work in ways to make the recipients happy, and the citizenry trusts her with important work (see "The One Where Pinkie Knows"), and is in a way a 'Bunny Ears Lawyer'.
And we also see that she gears her parties and activities towards her guests.
This AU though. Pinkie Pie never had that bit of personal development, or really grasped how to work with others. Rather than placing her own opinions, feelings, and perceptions over others and forcing them on others with or without their consent. So in a lot of ways this Pinkie is different in may ways from M!Verse.
Very nicely written -- this struck as essentially what the original episode should have been. "Swarm of the Century" tried to be about the importance of communication and listening to what your friends have to say, but it didn't really work out because a, Pinkie didn't actually try to communicate much at all, and b, the others' solution was also quite efficient and would have worked just fine without her input if Fluttershy hadn't apparently forgotten that the whole plague started with one parasprite to begin with (or, basically, it worked fine and failed chiefly because the plot needed it to). This story did a much better job of showing that communication needs to be a two-way street and also of showing what's going on under the hood, so to speak, and why exactly Pinkie and the others weren't talking and/or listening to each other.
since I started reading this universe, I wanted Trixie to make friends with one of the original mane six