The Pony Who is All Passion
I woke up in bed after the best night of sex I’ve ever had.
I let out an immensely satisfied groan and gave a slow, languid stretch, reveling in that special kind of worn out soreness that only comes after a night of wild, no-holds barred banging. Once I had worked all those wonderful little kinks out of my body, I rolled over in bed and put a hoof across my partner’s chest. “I don’t know about you, but I think that was officially the best sex ever.”
My partner rolled over in bed, meeting my eyes with his own bloodshot green orbs. “Yes,” the Diamond Dog announced with a grin that showed a huge collection of yellowed teeth. “Nice pony. Pretty pony.” The creature reached out and ran a single grubby, dirt-caked claw through my mane. “We do doggy style again, yes?”
Under the circumstances, I think my reaction was appropriately restrained.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAA—
“—AARGH!” I woozily tumbled off my couch, frantically searching the room for any sign of the Diamond Dog. After a couple seconds of terrified confusion my brain started putting the facts together. I was sleeping on my couch in the living room, not my bed, and there certainly hadn’t been anything else sleeping with me.
“It was just a nightmare,” I reassured myself. A horrible, horrible nightmare.
I gave one last shake of my head to dispel the memories of that terrifying dream, and took a quick look around the room just to reassure myself there were no Diamond Dogs lurking in the shadows, waiting to pounce the instant I turned my back. Diamond Dogs will do that. I swear, one time when I’m really, really, drunk and they all think I’m on the market for them. Well, if they thought they could get a piece of me, they’d have another thing coming. Damned dirty Diamond Dogs.
My bedroom door slowly creaked open, and I immediately went on guard, ready to dispense a righteous beatdown to the first canine I saw. Thankfully, there were no Diamond Dogs lurking in my home, trying to trick me into banging them. Instead, it was just a slightly drowsy Blossomforth. “Cloudy? You okay?”
I let out a massive yawn and stretched all my limbs, working out a few bits of soreness I’d picked up by virtue of my tumble from the couch. “I’m fine, Blossom. Just had a nightmare is all. Sorry I woke you up.”
“‘Salright,” Blossom reassured me. “You didn’t wake me up. Wanna have a midnight snack while you talk about your dream?”
“Not really.” I’d be much happier just doing everything in my power to repress the memory of that particular dream. Stupid Diamond Dogs.
Blossom settled down on the couch next to me and gave me a gentle little nuzzle. “Well maybe we could have a midnight snack and just hang out a bit until you’re up for getting back to sleep?”
“I’m not really hungry.” Just the thought of one of those things ending up in my bed again had pretty much killed my appetite. Not just my appetite for food either—having a sexy mare sitting right next to me was doing pretty much nothing for me right now.
Blossom wasn’t about to let the matter drop. “Well maybe I could make us a midnight snack, and then—”
I gently cut her off with an upraised hoof. “You’re hungry again, aren’t you, Blossom?”
Even with none of the lights on, I could see the faint blush rising up on her cheeks. “Hey, growing back feathers takes a lot of energy.” She sounded just a touch defensive. I might have been teasing her a bit about how much she’s been eating lately. She didn’t even wait for me to answer before she trotted off to the kitchen to start rooting around in my icebox.
To be fair, the old mares’ sayings about how you should feed a fever goes double when it comes to the feather flu. Replacing all the feathers a pony drops during the flu is heavy work. At least Blossom was over the flu itself and had gotten to the feather re-growing side of things. Still, after a week of dealing with a severely sick pegasus, and another week of dealing with a mildly ill and ravenously hungry one, I was about ready for her to be back to one hundred percent healthy.
No reason to let a couple inconvenient facts get in the way of some quality teasing time, though. “Better be careful, Blossom. You’re gonna end up eating me out of house and home, and all that food you’re stuffing in your face is gonna end up going right to your flanks.”
“Oh shut up.” Blossom’s answer might have been a bit more forceful if she wasn’t speaking around an apple slice. For a second she looked like she might hoof me in the shoulder as well, but after careful consideration she decided that smacking me wasn’t worth the risk of dropping her loaded down plate of apples and banana bread. “B’sides,” she grumbled around a piece of said bread, “You like big flanks anyway. Derpy’s got that huge bubble butt.”
“Okay, that’s a fair point.” Derpy never did get around to shedding all that baby fat she picked up from having Dinky. Not that I was complaining in the slightest—it’s not like she was anywhere close to being obese, she just had a little bit of bouncy curviness to her. It certainly beat Rainbow Dash’s tiny little flank full of dense, tightly packed muscle.
What? I can’t help noticing these things.
Granted, there have been times when I wouldn’t mind a bit of a happy medium between Derpy’s wonderful bubble butt and Dash’s nonexistent rump. Eepy and Blossom both fell into that category. Blossom was reasonably fit from all the work she did on the weather team, but didn’t quite go to Rainbow Dash’s level of pushing herself until her body fat content needed a decimal point after the percentage. Eepy was in the same category, but with the added bonus of weekly spa treatments keeping everything back there nice and loose, and her coat so wonderfully, lustrously soft.
“Cloud Kicker,” Blossom announced with a hint of a smirk. “You’re drooling.”
“Am not.” I wiped my mouth anyway, just in case. At least now I had confirmation that the horrible Diamond Dog nightmare hadn’t done any permanent damage to my libido. That would’ve been a real tragedy. We’d have to hold a massive funeral for my sex drive. Mourners would come from across Equestria, and beyond. Speeches would be given, tears would be shed, and the world would be a sadder, emptier place.
I cuddled up a little closer to Blossom, who spared a moment in between shoving food into her face to wrap a wing around me. Now that I had a plate full of food sitting in front of me a midnight snack didn’t sound so bad after all. Blossom didn’t say anything when I snagged a piece of banana bread off her plate, but the look she gave me made it clear that taking anything more would be pushing my luck. At the rate she was putting the food away, I’d be lucky to put a hoof on the plate and not end up having her bite it off.
Even love only gets you so much when you’re dealing with a starving mare.
Once the hungry beast had sated herself for the moment, she wiped a few breadcrumbs off her muzzle and turned to me with a slightly sheepish grin. “Sorry about eating you out of house and home.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I reassured her with a casual wave of my hoof. “I asked Rainbow for an advance on your pay. That’s what I’ve been paying for all the food with.”
“How considerate of you,” Blossom broke out the dry sarcasm.
“Yeah, I’m just a big ol’ softie like that.” The two of us shared a look, and then we were both giggling like schoolfillies. Luna, it had been way too long since we had a moment to just sit down and talk like this. No pressure, no worries, just the two of us being friends and enjoying each other’s company. Getting back to the fun back-and-forth teasing that had always been the foundation of our friendship instead of being caught up in all the stupid relationship drama that just kept dragging things down into the pit of Tartarus.
Blossom and I scooted a little closer together, just basking in each other’s presence. Sadly, the moment couldn’t last. Blossom had to break it by blushing and very hesitantly speaking up. “Um, I’m feeling a lot better now. So, you know, you don’t have to sleep on the couch anymore. If—if you’d like to sleep in your bed instead...” Blossom was positively flaming as she very quietly confessed. “I think I’d be okay with that.”
Some part of me couldn’t help critiquing Blossom’s seduction technique. To be honest, she didn’t get many points from a strictly technical perspective. Her expression was all wrong: she should be smiling at me with just the tiny little hint of a pout while coyly fluttering her eyelashes at me, not sitting next to me, not quite able to bring herself to actually look me in the eye while she worried at her lower lip. She didn’t look like an experienced seductress trying to lure me into her bed, she looked like exactly what she was: a nervous virgin who had just decided to give her virginity up, almost as scared by the prospect as she was excited.
What her seduction lacked in skill, it made up for with simple sincerity. Blossom was offering herself to me, blemishes and fears and all. It might not have been sexy by any conventional definition, but I was still sorely tempted to take her up on the offer. She was just so genuine and earnest in her desire to get me into bed.
Sadly, discipline beat out desire. I leaned forward and gave her a single loving but carefully restrained kiss. “Blossom, sweetie.” I ran a hoof through her mane. “I’d like that, I really would, but I think you, me, and Derpy all need to sit down and have a big talk before we do something like that.”
“Oh.” Blossom’s gaze dropped down the couch, her cheeks burning with shame. “Right. I—sorry, I shouldn’t have...”
I cut her self-deprecation off with another kiss. “It’s fine, Blossom. Really.” I should’ve set something up with Derpy a lot sooner. I’d kissed Blossom and confessed my love two whole weeks ago, and I still hadn’t done anything to sort this whole mess out. It was past time the three of us sat down and worked out some kind of solution. Sure, Blossom had been sick for half of that time, and was still recovering now, but I couldn’t deny I’d been doing a little procrastinating on that point either. I really wasn’t looking forward to sitting down with the two mares I loved and trying to work out some way to make them both happy when as far as I could tell they were both determined to break the other’s heart.
Blossom shifted around on the couch, brushing against me in ways that made me wish we didn’t have to hold off on jumping into bed. Stupid self-discipline and concern for the feelings of others. The worst part was that she wasn’t even trying to get me riled up, she was just being awkward and insecure. Unfortunately, Blossom being Blossom was all it took to start getting me riled up. Now that I’d finally started dealing with the fact that I wanted her, it was kinda hard to just shut off my attraction.
I gave Blossom another quick peck on the lips, and had to struggle with the urge to push the kiss a bit further than that. “Look, maybe we better go back to bed. Separately.” I added the last part as much for my own benefit as for hers.
“I—yeah, I guess so,” Blossom reluctantly agreed. After lingering for several seconds, she very reluctantly pulled herself away from me, slowly walking back to the bedroom. “Good night, Cloud Kicker.”
“G’night, Blossom.”
I woke up to the smell of frying haybacon and Rainbow Dash knocking my hindquarters off the couch. “Oops.” She gave me one of those patented Rainbow Dash grins that managed to look slightly sheepish without quite crossing over into actually admitting that she was wrong. “Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you up.”
“Then maybe you shouldn’t have knocked me halfway off the couch.” I stretched and let out a massive yawn, reluctantly dragging myself into the land of wakefulness.
“Well you were taking up the whole couch,” Rainbow offered up in her own defense.
“What are you doing here, anyway?” Not that I normally minded having Rainbow around, but normally she wasn’t waking me up out of a fairly comfortable rest. To her credit Rainbow had been great about me needing some time off to help take care of Blossom, letting me come into work whenever I had spare time and even taking some time to play nurse in my place so I could get out to pick up groceries and check on Alula.
“Came by to see how you two were doing.” Rainbow settled down onto the portion of the couch I’d just vacated. “Since Blossomforth’s doing better I was thinking I could leave some paperwork for her.” Rainbow pointed to a somewhat massive stack of papers occupying one of my end tables. “Gives her something to do, means I can pay her for doing a day’s work, and if she’s handling all the paperwork left over from Tornado Day then I’m not stuck in the office doing it myself.”
“Sounds good. Blossom has been getting just a little stir crazy.” Now that she wasn’t seriously ill or contagious anymore we could at least go out and about, but she was still feeling bad enough that she wanted to spend most of her time indoors, taking it easy. A pony can only spend so long reading books or messing around with a couple of her little engineering projects before she wants a change of pace.
Speaking of my temporary roommate, I could see the top of Blossom’s head bobbing around over the kitchen counter, so I guess that answered the question of who was making haybacon. Not that I was surprised—ever since she’d started feeling only mildly sick Blossom had taken over cooking duties to pay me back for helping her out. Blossom was a pretty good cook, though she ran into the occasional issues from the fact that she was used to doing her cooking on thunderclouds, not stoves. Besides, I liked my haybacon slightly burned anyway.
“So,” I prompted Rainbow, who seemed to be making herself entirely too comfortable for a pegasus who’d just come by to drop off some paperwork. “You dropped off the paperwork, and we’re fine. Why are you still here, sitting on my couch?”
“Blossomforth’s making breakfast,” Rainbow answered shamelessly.
“Moocher.” I casually hoofed her in the shoulder.
“Yeah, well I sign your paychecks, so there.” Rainbow stuck her tongue out at me. She’s a real paragon of maturity sometimes. “Besides, the haybacon smelled really good and Blossom invited me.”
Blossom took a break from making said haybacon to drop off a plate with a couple bagels and strawberry cream cheese. Judging by the bagel she currently had clamped between her teeth, the smell of haybacon had riled up her appetite enough that she needed something in her stomach right away. To be fair to her, it wasn’t like she was the only one whose stomach was grumbling a bit. Frying haybacon has to be one of the most appetizing smells out there.
I grabbed a bagel and immediately started applying some spread to it, and was a little surprised when Rainbow didn’t join me. She’d been eager enough to grab a seat on my couch and order up some food, and Blossom made a point of bringing out a bagel for each of us. I set my bagel down and turned to look at her. “Something wrong, Rainbow?”
“Not really.” I’m fluent enough in Rainbow Dash-ese to know that meant ‘yes.’ I gave her a bit of time to build up her courage and get comfortable—getting Dash to talk about anything that was bugging her was an exercise in patience. She wasn’t timid like Eepy or prone to letting things bottle up like Blossom could be, but she could be stubbornly independent-minded. It could be a lot of work to get Rainbow to admit that there’s something bothering her that she can’t handle on her own.
The key was to let her set her own pace working up to a confession. Badgering her would just make her set her hooves and start getting defensive. Instead, I let her approach the issue on her own terms. “So,” Dash began, “I was thinking...”
I couldn’t resist a snarking opportunity like that. “First time for everything.”
Dash let out a snort and slugged me in the the shoulder. “I do lots of thinking. I’m a total thinking-type pony. Just not an egghead.” Having settled that matter, Dash shifted around the couch a bit, knocking my blanket and extra pillows off onto the floor to give herself a bit more room. “Anyway, I was thinking about stuff with me and Pinkie. ‘Cause, you know, we’ve been together for a couple months now, and she’s been really awesome for the whole time. Especially with all the stuff I’ve had going on lately. So I was thinking that maybe it was time for us to finally think about, um...” Rainbow waved a hoof vaguely in the air for a while until she worked up the guts to say the actual word. “Banging.”
“Oh.” I sank down onto the couch next to her, and wrapped a wing over her shoulders. It says a lot about how much this was bothering Rainbow that she didn’t mind the contact. Rainbow’s not exactly a huge fan of casual physical contact most of the time. Especially from me. “You and Pinkie doing the business? That’s ... that’s a big step.”
“No kidding.” Rainbow shifted a bit so my wing lay a bit more comfortably around her. “So ... do you think I'm ready?”
I thought carefully about my answer. “I think that if you wanna do it, you're ready.” With all of Rainbow’s somewhat understandable issues when it came to that kind of intimacy, actually wanting to have sex was a pretty huge first step.
Rainbow took a couple seconds to mull over that before she nodded, took a deep breath, and very slowly let it out. “Okay. Go time.” She must have been feeling better, because she reached across the plate to snatch away the bagel I’d gone to all the trouble of applying spread to, instead of taking the one Blossom had set aside for her. Judging by how quickly the bagel went from Dash’s hooves to her stomach, it was a darn tasty one. Rainbow let out a loud, approving belch to confirm it.
“Moocher,” I grumbled.
Rainbow gave a completely unbothered shrug. “Eh, I prefer schnorrer.”
After briefly struggling with the urge to pin Rainbow down and tickle her into submission, I picked up another bagel and got to work putting the fruit spread on this one. I made a point of using up every last bit of the spread, so Rainbow wouldn’t get any more. “So, you and Pinkie are finally gonna do the business?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” Rainbow idly poked at the empty plate, as if hoping that a fresh bagel would suddenly appear out of thin air. “Well ... she's been wanting to and it's the sort of things fillyfriends do with each other, right?”
“Yeah, true.” Hay, I’d idly poked fun at them for not banging more than once. I hope that wasn’t a factor in Rainbow’s decision-making. “You sure you're gonna be okay with it?”
Rainbow puffed out her chest and put on a fearless grin, though I knew her well enough to catch the hint of worry in her eyes that gave away her false bravado. “Of course! Why wouldn't I be? I'm Rainbow Dash, t-the awesomest pony and um ... stuff.” Rainbow shot a nervous look in the general direction of the kitchen, making sure Blossom was too busy cooking to hear what we were talking about.
“'Course you are.” You have to feed Dash’s ego a little when she’s being all nervous and lacking in confidence, or else she’ll just completely crash on you. Not too much, though, or she’ll start getting a big head. It’s a delicate balancing act, but I’ve got plenty of experience dealing with her. “So ... want some advice from the master?”
Rainbow hesitated and shot another look at the kitchen to make sure Blossom wasn’t listening, and then instinctively scoped out the rest of the room to make sure nopony else was around. When she finally spoke, it was in a hushed, nervous whisper. “I just ... I mean, it's so weird!”
“Weird? How so?” Pinkie hadn’t been into anything that strange the one time we hooked up and banged years ago. Come to think of it, that fact made this whole conversation just a bit more awkward. Considering the fact that we were discussing Rainbow Dash’s sex life, we really didn’t need any help bumping up the awkward levels.
Rainbow gave a slightly melodramatic shudder. “It’s just that the idea of having somepony touching you, ya know, down there ... I mean, I don't even like touching myself there!” Okay, I would’ve been fine not knowing that, even though she probably just meant the nonsexual reasons a mare would do that. I was much happier not thinking about Rainbow Dash clopping.
Come to think of it, that didn’t do much to make the rest of this conversation any less awkward. Dear Celestia, this might be the worst banging-related talk I’d had to deal with since my parents belatedly sat me down to have The Talk with me. I tried to rein in my rising gorge and just focus on helping my friend. “It might seem a little strange at first, but trust me, you'll like it once you get into the swing of things.”
Rainbow shot me a worried frown. “A-are you sure? I mean, it can't feel that good. Can it?”
I smiled indulgently as a plethora of very fond memories drifted into my mind. “Trust me, it does. It’s pretty much the best feeling in the world, especially when you’re doing it with somepony you love, and who loves you back.”
The dam finally broke, and Rainbow let some of her fear show. She clutched one of my forehooves in both of hers, and an edge of barely controlled panic entered her voice. “But what if I'm not good at it? I mean, I'm good at everything but ... I mean, what if I don't make Pinkie feel good and something goes wrong and then she'll just laugh and my reputation will be ruined forever and she'll break up with me and hate me and everypony'll laugh and...”
I put a hoof over her mouth to cut off the stream of terrified babbling. “Dash, relax. Just tell her it’s your first time, and she'll understand if you’re still figuring things out. Besides, she loves you to bits, and that’s not gonna change. You'll be fine.” I grinned and tightened my wing around her, pulling Rainbow in a little closer for a confidential little whisper. “You know, as long as you're here, I guess I could give you a couple pointers.”
Rainbow let out a nervous gulp. “Uh, yeah. That sounds good. Thanks.” I sure hope she wasn’t thinking something silly, like that I was planning to give her ‘hooves-on training’ with a practice bang or two. Having sex with Rainbow, even just as practice for Pinkie was just ... no. Not that she was ugly, but there was just too much history there. Advice, however, was just fine.
Well, first things first, I needed to figure out what I had to work with. “So ... how much do you know about banging beyond basic sex ed?”
Rainbow opened her mouth to answer, but nothing beyond a slightly strangled sound came out. Her cheeks started flaming, and she rubbed her forelegs together in a vague sort of motion that was clearly supposed to convey something, but failed. Finally, she very shakily managed to declare. “I know ... stuff. And things. Y’know ... a lot of it.”
So, we were pretty much working with a blank slate here. Well, at least I wouldn’t have to worry about knocking any bad info out of her head. “How about I just cover everything?”
For a second it looked like Rainbow might object, but for once sense won out over pride, and she conceded with a weak nod. A second later, she tried to salve her damaged ego. “Yeah, sure. It’ll be like a review session or something.”
Oh, Rainbow Dash. Never change. “Now, first things first, you gotta take things slow.” I grinned and gave her a teasing little nudge. “I know you, you'd wanna jump right to the big finish.”
“Yeah yeah, of course!” Rainbow gave an eager nod, only to pause with a confused frown a few seconds later. “So, how do you take it slow? What is 'it’?”
Oh Celestia, we really were starting with an absolute blank slate here. “Okay, Rainbow Dash, when two ponies love each other very very much, they—”
“I know that part!” Rainbow cut me off, her cheeks bright red with an embarrassed blush. “My moms didn’t leave me completely in the dark!”
Rainbow really is too much fun to mess with sometimes. I bit back a snort of laughter and got back to work on helping her out. “Banging would be 'it'. I would suggest you start with the simple stuff, some kissing and touching. Foreplay and all that.”
She gave a slow nod, a very tentative smile on her face. “Okay. Kissing and touching, I can do that. Hay, I already do that with Pinkie sometimes.”
It occurred to me that it might not be a bad idea to loan Rainbow my copy of the Kamare Sutra. Between the book itself and my fairly extensive notes in the margins, she would have plenty of material to work with. Well, that was a thought for the future—no point in worrying about the little details until we hammered out the big picture stuff. “Pay attention to how Pinkie's reacting to you. What makes her happy, and what doesn't. For example, she really likes being touched around the base of her tail.”
“Okay, thanks I—” The last bit of what I said slowly worked its way through Rainbow’s brain, and she faced me with an unreadable expression. “How do you know that?
She didn’t know? I kinda figured she would’ve put two and two together, but then Rainbow Dash does seem to have a bit of a mental blank spot when it comes to general understanding of romance, relationships, and banging. I sighed and laid it out for her. “You remember that one Nightmare Night, the first one after Derpy moved to Ponyville? Do you remember how Pinkie and I went off together about halfway through, and you didn't see me again until the next day?”
From the bemused look on her face, Dash still didn’t get it. “Yeah, what abou—” Her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped as the facts finally clicked. “What? You banged Pinkie!?”
I winced a bit at her volume—Blossom definitely overheard that part. I’m generally not in the habit of advertising or bragging about my bang partners. Not that I’m ashamed of them or try to hide them, but a bit of discretion is usually a good thing. No time to worry about privacy issues right now though, I needed to run a bit of damage control with Rainbow. “It was seven years ago, Dash. You two weren't even friends yet, let alone a couple.”
Rainbow’s jaw was still just about resting on the sofa. “Yeah but...” Rainbow’s nose crinkled up and she gave a slight shudder. “Eww.”
Well, as far as reactions to finding out I’d banged her special somepony go, I could do a lot worse than ‘Eww’. At least she wasn’t mad at me. I tried to smile at her and break the tension with some bad humor. “Look on the bright side. You know I've got good advice now.”
The joke didn’t seem to work, since instead of laughing Rainbow went darkly silent. After long enough to start making me just a little nervous, Rainbow asked with a hint of a sullen pout. “Who else has Pinkie, um, been with?”
Oh great, there’s a big old relationship landmine. I don’t really pry too much into the sex lives of other ponies, but you can’t help hearing things. Small towns love their gossip. “I don't really know for sure about Pinkie, but she wasn't a virgin when we did it. And there have probably been other ponies since me.” Simply put, banging is fun, and Pinkie Pie is well known for being a fan of all things fun.
“Swell,” Rainbow grumbled and flopped back against my couch hard enough that I felt the need to pull my wing out of her path. “That just means that she's been with a bunch of other ponies and knows what to expect.”
I judged it safe to go back to wing-hugging her. “Yeah, but none of those ponies were you.”
“But I've never—” Rainbow applied both hooves to her face and let out a loud, frustrated groan. “This sucks. How the hay am I supposed to beat all the other ponies she’s been with who actually knew what they were doing? Hay, how am I supposed to do better than you on my first time?”
Okay ... ow. That was almost enough to make me regret that one night with Pinkie. I’ll admit, I’m pretty damn good in the bedchamber. Now wasn’t the time to brag about my prowess, though. “Dash, you'll be fine. Really.”
Rainbow crossed her forelegs over her chest in a stubborn pout. “How do you know?”
Time to go with my usual strategy for dealing with a sullen, pouty Rainbow Dash whose self-confidence was getting a bit low. Feed her ego. “Because you're Rainbow Dash, and you're awesome.”
There’s a reason that’s one of my oldest and most frequently used tricks when it comes to her. It almost always works like a charm. Sure enough, a hint of a smile started working its way onto her face. “Yeah.”
“Damn right you are.” I grinned and gave her a friendly little nuzzle. “Trust me, you'll knock Pinkie's socks off ... assuming she's wearing any.”
That tentative smile on her face got a little bigger. “You really think so?”
“'Course I do.” I figured one more compliment ought to be enough to push her into feeling appropriately good about herself. “When have you not been awesome at anything?”
Instead of getting pumped full of excited confidence like I’d been hoping for, Rainbow’s eyes drifted to a couple of barely noticeable dents in the side of my doorframe. Then she bit her lip and just gave me a sad, heartbroken look.
Oh. Right.
I let out a pained sigh and slowly wrapped her in a hug. Great, here I was trying to make her feel better about herself, and instead I go and remind her of some of her biggest feather-ups. Nice going, me. I ran a hoof over her mane, gently murmuring nonsensical words of comfort to her.
After a minute or so, Rainbow let out a sigh and pulled back a bit. Not completely out of the hug, but she put a little bit of distance between us to let me know she was okay now. “I just—I have this really bad habit of screwing things up with my friends. And this...” Rainbow’s eyes dropped down to intently study my sofa. “If I screw things up with Pinkie Pie, I don’t know what I’ll do.”
I put a hoof under her chin, and brought her eyes back up to meet mine. “Rainbow, the past is the past. You won't mess this up. Besides, even when you do screw up, you always fix things. You fixed things with me, after all. Compared to that, you and Pinkie will be fine.”
Rainbow let out a very quiet little sniffle. “Doesn't mean I don't get tired of always messing up and hurting my friends.”
“Nopony's perfect, Dash.” After a moment’s hesitation I did something slightly risky, and gave her a quick peck on the lips. There wasn’t anything romantic about the kiss, it was pure love and friendship. Dash stiffened in surprise, and for a second I was worried she might freak out on me or misunderstand my intentions, but then she let out a breath and relaxed in my hooves.
“Heh, looks like you finally put the moves on me.” Dash and I shared a slightly awkward laugh at that. A friendly kiss and a bad joke were an unusual way of sorting out a crisis of confidence, but they seemed to do the job. When Rainbow spoke again, she didn’t sound nearly so worried. “So, how do I make Pinkie really happy when we're, you know...”
“Banging.” At least Dash wasn’t as bad as Blossom used to be about the word. Normally she wasn’t too shy about the subject, but I guess the prospect of actually doing the business in the near future had her nervous. “Well, the first thing you do is—”
Our conversation came to an abrupt end as Blossom walked into the room, balancing a plate heaped down with waffles, haybacon, and eggs on each wing. “Breakfast is served. I know Cloud Kicker’s going to want lemonade, but what can I get you to drink, Rainbow?”
Rainbow gave a slight wince, followed up with a painfully forced smile. “Hey Blossomforth. Um, lemonade’s good for me too.”
Blossom shot a slight frown of the two of us, presumably picking up on the fact that she’d disrupted our conversation. “Okay. Um, I’ll be back with your drinks and my breakfast in a bit, okay?”
“Sounds good.” While Blossom bustled back into the kitchen, I turned back to Rainbow and added sotto voce. “Maybe I can come by your place later to finish this up?” We couldn’t really get into the fine details of how to bang while Blossom was in the room. Well, we could, but Rainbow wouldn’t be comfortable with it.
Rainbow gave a slightly nervous nod. “S-sure. Sounds good.”
Blossom came back with our drinks and her own, much more heavily loaded down plate, and for a while the three of us were companionably silent as we demolished our breakfast. Unsurprisingly Rainbow Dash was the first one to finish, though Blossom was following pretty closely behind even though she’d started out with more food.
Now that she was done mooching a free meal off of me, Rainbow was ready to head in to work. Not that there was much weather work to do today—the weather squad was still on light duty while everypony recovered from the combination of Tornado Day and the feather flu. “Thanks again for the food, Blossom.” Rainbow was halfway out the door when she stopped, then looked back over her shoulder. “Oh, hey, just remembered. You’re going over to Fluttershy’s to see Alula today, right Cloud?”
“Yeah, that’s the plan,” I confirmed around a mouthful of waffle.
“Well, Derpy told me that Dinky’s been asking about her, so she wanted to know if you think Alula’s doing good enough to have visitors.” Rainbow shot a fond grin in the general direction of Derpy’s house. “I bet Alula’d like to see the squirt too. Gotta be a little boring with just Fluttershy for company.”
I thought it over for a bit, and nodded. “Yeah, sure. Alula’s been getting better.” Whatever it was she’d come down with had really knocked her for a loop, but she’d been getting a little bit stronger and healthier every day, so I wasn’t too worried. “Could you stop by Derpy’s place and let her know?”
“Yeah, no problem.” Rainbow shot a quick glance at Blossom and a very slight frown, then added. “She’ll probably wanna come along too. She’s kinda been missing you.”
I gave a slight guilty flinch at that. It’s not like I wanted to neglect my fillyfriend, but between taking care of Blossom, keeping an eye on Alula, and squeezing in work shifts whenever I could, there just hadn’t been time for her. It didn’t help that I’d been getting a bit affectionate with Blossom in the meantime, even if I’d made a point of not letting things go too far. “Yeah, sounds good. Be nice to see her and Dinky both.”
Two seconds after I knocked on Derpy’s front door, it shot open and something adorable attached itself to my right foreleg. “Hiya Miss Cloud Kicker!” Dinky beamed up at me while doing her best to cut off the circulation in my leg. “Didja bring me anything?”
“That’s not how you say hello, Muffin.” There was just a hint of parental disapproval in Derpy’s voice as she trotted out after her daughter and gave me a peck on the cheek.
Dinky went quiet for a long moment, then grinned up at me, her face a picture of fillyhood innocence. “I love you, Cloud Kicker.”
Willpower fading ... fading ... gone. Some rational part of my brain knew Dinky was playing me like a fiddle, but I didn’t care—she was just too adorable. “Well, I think a filly as cute as you are deserves some candy.”
“Yay!” Dinky tightened her grip on my foreleg for a bit, then started clambering up onto my back. “Ponyback ride! Ponyback ride!”
Derpy tossed another one of those special loving smiles of hers at the two of us. I’m pretty sure being good with Dinky was earning me tons of muffin points with her. “You know,” she commented with a hint of bubbly laughter in her voice, “she’s got you completely wrapped around her hoof. You’re going to end up spoiling her rotten at this rate. Just watch, soon every time you see her you’ll be giving her candy and ponyback rides.”
“Don’t care, she’s too adorable.” I grinned and gave the filly riding on my back a quick nuzzle. “I have a confession to make, Derpy. The whole reason I hooked up with you is just so I could spend more time with your daughter.”
“Well, I can hardly blame you for that.” Derpy stepped up next to me and planted a kiss on her daughter’s head, drawing a giggle and a half-hearted whine of protest from Dinky. “Everypony knows my little muffin is the best filly in Equestria.”
“Yeah!” Dinky gave her mom a precocious grin. “I’ve been a really good little muffin, so that’s why I deserve lotsa candy!”
“Spoiled. Rotten,” Derpy grumbled good-naturedly. “She’s always this way after she gets back from visiting her grandparents.”
The three of us headed over to Ponyville Market to pick up the candy. I’d been planning to pick up a little something for ‘Lula anyway, so getting Dinky something as well wasn’t a big deal. I ruled out Sugarcube Corner—as much as I liked dropping by the bakery, if they had fresh muffins there would be no hope of dragging her out of there until she’d finished devouring the Cake’s entire stock. Besides, it had been a while since I’d had a chance to stop and say hi to Bon Bon. All the relationship stuff and work responsibilities and general life stuff had kind of put a bit of a damper on my usual casual banging around, including the slightly more established stuff like playing third pony for Lyra and Bon Bon.
Damn, it had been way too long since I had a good threesome.
To my vague surprise, Lyra was running the candy stand instead of Bon Bon. She grinned and waved when she saw us, and that grin only got bigger when the three of us walked up to what was temporarily her stand. “Heya Cloud Kicker! Wow, it feels like it’s been forever since we ran into each other!”
I gave a casual shrug, and made a point of shifting a bit so Lyra could see that Dinky was riding along. One of her more charming qualities was the ability to crack the occasional raunchy joke, so I wanted to forewarn her that there was a filly present. “Yeah, sorry about not being around, Lyra. You know how it is, work stuff was keeping me busy, and then there was the whole feather flu thing.”
The unicorn rolled her eyes and gave an annoyed little grumble. “Yeah, tell me about it. Stupid work.” She waved a hoof at the stand she was managing. “Bons asked me to cover for her today. I dunno how she manages to do this every day.”
“The bits probably help,” Derpy suggested.
Before Lyra could offer any further thoughts on the matter, Dinky took advantage of her perch on my back to put her forehooves up on the stand, eagerly surveying all the candy on offer. “Ooh! I want summa that!” She pointed a hoof at a collection of chocolates, only to change her mind a couple seconds later when she saw some mints. “No, I want those instead!” Then her eyes went wide when she spotted the taffy. “No, I want that!” Her face screwed up in childish concentration. “Or maybe some of the gumdrops? I dunno, it all looks good!” She turned to me with a hopeful smile. “Can I just get some of everything?”
As much as I loved spoiling her, even I have my limits. If Dinky had her way I’d end up buying her enough candy to ruin her supper and empty out my coinpurse. However, I didn’t account for the fact that Lyra was also getting hit with a full dose of Dinky’s adorable enthusiasm. The unicorn brought up a foreleg to ruffle Dinky’s mane, and dropped her head next to hers to offer in a conspiratorial whisper. “I always have a hard time deciding too. Tell you what, Bon Bon has these sampler platters that actually have a little bit of everything on them, sounds like it would be perfect for you. What do you say?”
“Okay!” Dinky eagerly bobbed her head.
Lyra’s horn glowed, and she pulled a fairly large box out from underneath the stand. “Here you go.” From the size of the candy box, I had a sinking feeling in my stomach that Lyra had just conspired with Dinky to turn a nice profit. Turning down the big sampler box would make Dinky get all sad and pouty on me, which rather defeated the purpose of buying her candy to spoil her.
I was reluctantly preparing to part with my bits when Lyra cut me off with an upraised hoof. “It’s on the house, Cloud. No charge for friends.”
I gave her an appreciative grin and carefully suppressed the urge to point out that Bon Bon never handed out big freebies like that. Sure, she might give me a little discount or at least not barter quite so vigorously, but there’s a big difference between giving your friends five percent off and just handing stuff over for free. I wasn’t gonna complain too hard about free candy, though. “Thanks, Lyra.”
Dinky wasted no time taking the top off the box and stuffing a chunk of peanut brittle into her mouth. The filly finally remembered her manners after Derpy cleared her throat and gave her a rather pointed look. Her words were just a little bit muffled by the fact that her mouth was still stuffed with half-eaten candy. “Sank yoo Miss Lyra.”
“Aw, you’re welcome, Dinky.” Lyra took advantage of the open candy box to help herself to one of the mints, then turned to me with a hopeful grin. “Hey, any chance you could come by our place sometime soon? It’s been a long time since Bon Bon and I got to hang out with you.” Lyra gave a slight nod in Dinky’s direction, just to make it clear that she was watching her words on account of the young and innocent ears present. Taking note of Dinky seemed to remind her that Derpy was there as well, and she shot my fillyfriend a slightly nervous smile. “Uh, you’re more than welcome to come too, Derpy.”
Well, that was one way to resolve the faux-pas of propositioning somepony for a threesome right in front of their special somepony. Upgrading things to a foursome sounded like a fine plan to me, but Derpy met my hopeful smile with a singularly unimpressed look. After a couple seconds, I reluctantly dropped the idea.
I guess I couldn’t really blame her for not liking the idea. Being a single mom in a small town like Ponyville came with a little bit of a stigma. Sure, all the stupid talk about her being loose had died down pretty quickly once it was clear that there was nothing to it (not to mention that unfortunate accident suffered by Sticks and Stones after they talked a bit too loudly), but the fact that it had happened at all stung her. The wound had mostly healed over, but it was still raw enough that she clearly wasn’t too happy about the idea of joining me in banging around.
Besides, aside from me Derpy had never really shown much interest in mares. Dinky’s father was a stallion, after all.
From the way Lyra’s face fell, she’d obviously figured out that her offer hadn’t gone over too well. Her horn glowed, and fresh candy shot into our box to replace what Dinky had already eaten. “Look, never mind. Sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. I’ll see you guys around, okay?”
“Yeah, sounds good.” As the three of us trotted off with our box of candy, I couldn’t help feeling just a little down about the fact that apparently I wouldn’t be visiting Lyra and Bon Bon anytime soon. Don’t get me wrong, for all the crazy horrible confusion my love life was currently going through, I didn’t regret being a little more settled down. Still, I did kinda miss being able to just drop by a friend’s house for a little casual threesome action. Maybe once things were a little more settled down I could get back to that kind of thing. Maybe.
Things between me and Derpy might’ve gone awkwardly silent for the trip to Eepy’s cottage if not for the presence of Dinky. As it was, Derpy’s little muffin was more than eager to fill any lapse in the conversation with a non-stop stream of chatter about anything and everything. Mostly stuff like what she’d been doing at school, her recent trip to Canterlot to go visit her grandparents, or general commentary on Sparkler. Being an excitable filly, she didn’t tend to stick to any one topic for very long, but I certainly didn’t mind hearing about whatever happened to be on her mind. After all, Dinky was adorable.
I was in the middle of learning all about when she brought her fire extinguisher to show and tell and how Miss Cheerilee said she did a really good job on her presentation when we got to Eepy’s. A couple seconds after I knocked on her door Eepy opened it with a fond smile for me, which slipped just the slightest bit when she noticed Derpy, only to redouble when Dinky made her presence known by hopping off my back and running up for a hug.
“How’s ‘Lula doing?” I felt a bit guilty about jumping straight to business with her like that, but when it came to my little sister I think I’m allowed to be a bit of a worrywart. Eepy certainly understood that I wasn’t trying to be rude or anything.
“Can I play with her?” Dinky chimed in before Eepy could give me an answer, unleashing one of her heart-melting smiles on Eepy. “‘Cause I really, really wanna! Even if she’s gotta stay in bed we could at least do Battle Clouds or something! You do have a Battle Clouds board, right? I was gonna bring mine, but I forgot until just now because Cloud Kicker bought me candy! Well, actually Miss Lyra gave it to us! She’s really nice. You’re nice too, though. Will you give me candy too?”
“Don’t be greedy, Muffin,” Derpy chided her. “You already have more candy than you could possibly eat.”
Derpy might be one of the best mothers out there, but I think she might be wrong on that point. “Never underestimate a foal’s ability to tear through anything with an unhealthy amount of sugar in it, Derpy.”
My fillyfriend let out a slightly pained sigh. “True. If I don’t put my hoof down at some point she’ll eat so much that she’ll be bouncing off the walls all night again.” Derpy had my sympathies there—Dinky might be cute as a button, but could be a bit of a hooffull even when she wasn’t riding a huge sugar high.
Eepy stepped in to defuse the situation. “I’m sure Alula would love it if you shared some of your candy with her, Dinky. And of course you can play with her, just try not to push her too much. She’s still getting better from being sick, so she needs her rest.”
“Okay! Thanks, Miss Fluttershy!” Dinky stood up on her hind legs to give Eepy a peck on the cheek. My heart immediately melted, then exploded. While all the adults in the room were busy processing the sheer adorableness of her actions, Dinky grabbed her box of candy and trotted off into Eepy’s bedroom. A couple seconds later Dinky’s voice excitedly chattering away from the other room, followed by ‘Lula’s slightly more subdued voice.
As much as I wanted to poke my head in to check on her, I decided to let the fillies have some time for themselves instead of disrupting things with my adult-ness. Instead, I trotted over to the couch and took a seat. “So ‘Lula’s still getting better?”
“Yes,” Eepy confirmed with relaxed smile. “All she needed was plenty of bedrest and a little kindness.”
“What about medicine?” There was just a hint of challenge in Derpy’s voice, and she made a point of settling down on the couch next to me and putting a wing around me. “Love and kindness is all well and good, but it takes a little bit more than that to help a sick filly.”
“Oh, well of course I’ve been giving her some herbal remedies to help her immune system too.” If Eepy noticed the tiny bit of hostility in Derpy’s voice, she very carefully ignored it. “Though to be honest I’ve never seen this particular illness before, so there’s only so much I can do to help her.”
“Perhaps somepony who’s a bit more familiar with fillyhood illnesses could help,” Derpy offered. “It might be something Dinky’s come down with before.”
“Oh, I’d be happy to have any help you could offer.” Eepy once more gently dodged past the verbal landmines in Derpy’s words. “I just want Alula to feel better.”
Eepy might be okay with Derpy’s prickliness, but I sure as hay wasn’t. “Eepy, I’m a little thirsty. Could I possibly bother you for some tea?” I’m normally not all that huge on tea, but making some would get Eepy out of the room for a few minutes. I think Derpy and I needed to have a bit of a chat.
Eepy’s hooves shot up to her mouth in horror. “Oh my, I should’ve offered you something sooner, I’m so sorry! I’ll go make some right away!” She wasted no time bustling off to the kitchen, leaving me alone with Derpy.
As soon as Eepy was safely out of earshot, I rounded on my fillyfriend. I wasn’t quite mad at her, but I was definitely getting a bit annoyed with her. “Derpy, I love you to bits, but what the hay do you think you’re doing?” She opened her mouth to offer something in her own defense, but I didn’t give her a chance. “No. You’re trying to pick a fight with Fluttershy of all ponies. You’re better than that, so cut it out.”
“Well excuse me if I’m just a little bothered by it,” Derpy grumbled, crossing her forelegs over her chest and refusing to look at me. “I think I’m allowed to be just a little upset that you left your sister in the care of your ex-fillyfriend, who you’ve outright admitted to me you’re still in love with. No, not just that, you told me you were planning to sleep with her again, and apparently I don’t even have any say in the matter!” Derpy sighed and bit her lip, then resentfully added. “I’ve barely seen you at all for the last two weeks, but you always had plenty of time to visit Fluttershy. Not to mention Blossomforth moved in with you. Can you really blame me for being a little upset?”
Okay, if I’m being completely honest I could understand why she was a little unhappy with the current situation. That didn’t mean I was okay with the way she was handling things. “Look, you know Blossom’s at my place because she’s got the feather flu. No other reason.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Derpy rolled her eyes, and some tiny part of my brain couldn’t stop giggling at how silly her wall-eyes looked when she did that. “You’re just having a mare you’ve already admitted you have feelings for sleeping in your bed. I’m obviously overreacting.”
“And I’m sleeping on the couch, Derpy.” I was starting to raise my voice just a little, so I held up a hoof to forestall any answer from her while I took a couple deep breaths. I might be getting just a bit exasperated with her, but I really didn’t wanna lose my cool. Especially not with Eepy, ‘Lula, and Dinky all in the house. “Look, Derpy, you know how nasty the feather flu is. Even if we were sleeping in the same bed, she wouldn’t be in the mood for anything or in any condition to follow through on it.” Not that it had stopped her from offering last night, but Derpy definitely didn’t need to know about that. I leaned over and put my forehooves on top of hers. “Look, Derpy, I’m not gonna go and sleep with her behind your back. That’s a promise.”
“I know she’s sick, and I know I should trust you.” Derpy put both her forehooves on her forehead, and let out a frustrated groan. “I know I’m being silly about all this, but I just...”
“What was I supposed to do, Derpy?” I reached over and gave her a quick comforting nuzzle. “It’s not like leaving her alone in her cloud-house was an option when she’s dropping half her feathers. She needed to go groundside, and somepony had to help take care of her until she’s better. Eepy was already taking care of ‘Lula, and somehow I don't think you're gonna play nursemare for Blossom.” Though I will admit that the idea of Derpy in my sexy nurse costume was rather appealing.
“I know all that, Cloud Kicker,” Derpy snapped at me. “I know she’s sick and she needs somepony to take care of her, I just wish she wasn’t in your house, sleeping in your bed, keeping you away from me all day.” She shot a baleful look at nothing in particular, and added. “Don’t tell me she hasn’t been using the opportunity to get closer to you, even if she’s too sick to do anything sexual. Especially since she can use the fact that she’s sick to win sympathy points from you.”
“Well what do you want me to do?” I stopped myself to take a couple more deep breaths. “What am I supposed to do about this that won’t upset you, Derpy? I can understand you’re worried she’s gonna somehow seduce me in between the times when we’re pulling damaged blood feathers or something, but she's still my friend. There’s no way in Tartarus I'm gonna leave her alone when she's sick and needs help.”
Derpy deliberately turned her back on me, and mumbled just loud enough for me to hear. “Is that really it, or are you just punishing me because I told you I wouldn’t be okay with sharing you?”
“Really?” I gave her a flat look. “After everything we've gone through, you think I'm that petty?”
Derpy let out an angry huff. “Well excuse me if I'm just a bit unhappy about my fillyfriend spending all day with a pair of ponies she's admitted that she wants to sleep with!”
I’ll admit, I was starting to get a little fed up with her. I’d done pretty much everything I could to reassure her, and she still wouldn’t budge. “What do you want from me, Derpy? Should I toss Blossom out on her plot when she can’t even get back to her own home? Push Eepy around and make her feel bad when she’s just trying to help? Do I need to wear a feathering chastity belt whenever I’m not around you?” I knew I was getting loud enough that ‘Lula, Dinky, and Eepy could probably hear us, but right now I was almost frustrated enough to not care about that. Almost. I reined my temper in, and dropped back down a normal speaking voice. “Look, you're welcome to come over if you've had your feather flu shots, and Fluttershy’s already said she’d be happy to let you help out with ‘Lula.”
“Yes, she’d be happy to let me help, but your sister’s staying here,” Derpy groused. Her voice turned positively poisonous as she added, “Please. We both know she’s just hoping that taking care of your sister will help her get back into your bed. Because that ended so well the first time you two slept together.”
A second after Derpy said that there was a loud squeak from the general direction of the kitchen, and the sound of a very expensive tea set crashing to the floor. A second later Eepy poked her head around the corner, tears clearly visible in her eyes. “I’m sorry! I wasn’t listening to you or anything, but you were talking so loudly I couldn’t help but overhear, and now I’ve ruined your tea and everything! I’m ... I’m ... please don’t hate me! If you want to take care of Alula instead that’s fine, Derpy! I don’t mind at all!”
Okay, I have now officially hit my breaking point. I wasn’t just angry or frustrated with Derpy, I was actively furious with her. Going after Eepy and hurting her like that was just unconscionable. “You want Alula that much, Derpy? Fine. Take her and go.” I tossed a significant look at Eepy, who was quietly sniffling as she tried to clean up the remnants of her tea set. “I hope it was worth it.”
Derpy looked back and forth between Eepy and I, her mouth hanging open slightly as the full impact of what had just happened sank in. “I—Fluttershy, I’m sorry. I didn’t—”
I cut her off before she could get any further. “Derpy, I think you should leave.” She opened her mouth again, and once more I stopped her from saying anything more. “Now.” Right now I was righteously pissed enough that I was on the verge of doing something I would regret later, like telling her that things were over between us. I loved Derpy, but she’d just crossed a huge line by making Eepy cry. There were no words for how not cool that was.
Derpy’s ears went flat and her head slowly drooped, as if the guilt was literally dragging her down. “Yeah. Okay. I’m sorry.” She very slowly plodded over to Eepy’s bedroom, her shoulders slumped, and she knocked on the door. “Muffin? It’s time for us to go. Alula’s coming with us.”
The bedroom door slowly creaked open, and Dinky very hesitantly stepped out. Oh Celestia, from the way she was acting she’d definitely heard us fighting. I hadn’t wanted that—it’s bad enough that Derpy and I got into it, but for her daughter and ‘Lula to have heard everything on top of it—I hope the bedroom door at least muffled things enough that the fillies didn’t hear too much of what we were fighting about.
Dinky slowly wrapped her forehooves around her mother’s neck, holding onto the hug for several seconds. When she was done hugging her mother, she immediately moved on to Eepy, maintaining the hug until Eepy hugged her back and stopped sniffling. Then it was my turn to get what I recognized as one of Dinky’s get-better hugs. It didn’t exactly fix everything, but it did at least burn a little of my anger away.
Dinky tightened her hug around my neck a bit, and then very quietly asked. “Were you yelling at each other ‘cause I got too much candy? ‘Cause I can give it back.”
Oh Celestia, she thought us getting into a fight was her fault. I hugged her back and gave her a quick kiss on the top of her head. “No, Dinky. You didn’t do anything wrong. You’ve been a very good little filly, okay? We’re just being a bunch of stupid adults, fighting about stupid adult things that have nothing to do with you.”
“‘Kay.” Dinky gave me one last little squeeze. “I love you.”
Despite how upset I was with her mother at the moment, hearing that still made my heart melt. “I love you too, Little Muffin.”
Dinky trotted back over to her mother, who already had ‘Lula on her back. I wanted to go over and say something to ‘Lula, but that would mean going over next to Derpy. That ... didn’t seem like it would be a good idea right now. Dammit, why did the girls have to get caught up in the middle of things? It wasn’t right for them to get caught in the crossfire like that. Alula gave me a sad, slightly weary wave and a weak smile. Then Derpy and the two girls silently walked out the door.
I let out a long, pained breath. What a disaster.
I trotted over to Eepy and gave her a very gentle nuzzle. “You doing okay? I’m sorry about that.”
Eepy let out a loud sniffle, and the tears started right back up again. “No. I’m sorry, Cloud Kicker, I shouldn’t be crying like this and making you worry about me when it’s all my fault you and Derpy just got into a horrible fight. I’m so sorry, I’m a terrible pony!”
“No you’re not,” I firmly reassured her. “You are the most wonderful, sweetest mare I’ve ever known. Derpy was way out of line saying those things about you.”
“But she was right.” Eepy let out an agonized whimper, fresh tears streaming down her face. “Not about me taking care of Alula just to make you like me more, but I did kind of hope that would happen. Even though you’re already special someponies with Derpy and you’re in love with Blossomforth too and it would just horribly greedy of me to take you away from both of them I still want to. So it’s okay if Derpy hates me, because I deserve it for being such a terrible pony who wants to steal you from her.”
“Eepy—Fluttershy.” I stepped up to her and kissed her cheeks, then around her eyes. I could taste her salty tears with each kiss as I slowly took her sorrows away. “You are not a bad pony. Derpy was wrong to say those things about you, and even she knew it.” I gently kissed her lips. “If you were as bad as you think you are, I wouldn’t love you so much.”
Eepy wrapped her hooves around me, whimpering into my shoulder until the last of her tears passed. “You still—even after finding out that I’m a horrible special-somepony-stealer, you still care about me?”
“Always.” I leaned in to kiss her again. This time, I didn’t break away after a couple seconds. I kept going, gently pushing against her while I wrapped my hooves around her. After a moment of frozen indecision, Eepy started kissing me, hesitantly at first, but swiftly mounting passion. As we continued kissing I started moving towards the open door of her bedroom, slowly and gently pulling Eepy along with me.
Eepy’s eyes went wide as she realized what I had in mind, and she broke the kiss. “C-Cloud Kicker! We can’t!”
I gently shushed her with a kiss. “Yes, we can.”
Eepy whimpered against my lips even as she hungrily kissed me back, torn between what she so very clearly wanted and what her brain was telling her was right. “But what about Derpy and Blossomforth? They’ll—”
I cut her off with another kiss. “This isn’t about them. This is only about us. You and me. This is our moment in time. For the next couple hours, there is no world outside of this room, this bed. There is nothing but us, and the love we share. For once, let’s not worry about every little thing other ponies might think. The only thing that matters right now is that we love each other. So let’s ignore the rest of the world, and take just a little bit of time for ourselves.”
Eepy hesitated for a long moment, and then hesitantly reached out to kiss me, wrapping herself around me and melting into my hooves. And for the next hour, there was nothing else in my world but Eepy, her bed, and love.
After a great deal of lovemaking that only came to a reluctant end when our bodies were on the verge of exhaustion, Eepy and I lay in bed together, content merely to lie together for the moment. I idly traced a single hoof along the contours of her body, feeling all the old familiar places and a few new ones. She felt just as perfect as I remembered, though there had definitely been some changes since the last time we’d been together. As a filly she’d been leggy and just a touch awkward, but she’d filled out wonderfully since then. The early promise of her awkward cuteness had blossomed into rich curves and delicious lines that I just couldn’t get enough of.
Her coat felt different from the way I remembered it being back Flight Camp. It was silkier now. Smoother. I guess I could attribute that to her weekly spa dates with Rarity. Back at Flight Camp a pony couldn’t really get much in the way of beauty treatment beyond scrubbing down with a cloud and cheap soap, and maybe a bit of work with a manebrush. Weekly spa pamperings were clearly paying off for Eepy—hay, if spa treatments could get my coat feeling like that I might need to start going more often myself.
I started gently kissing along Eepy’s neck, grinning at the way that sent a pleased shudder running through her body. A sudden, mad notion popped into my head. “You know what we should do?” Eepy let out an inquiring little murmur. “We should elope to Las Pegasus. Tonight, before we have a chance to change our minds about it. Just take wing and fly all the way there, and come back in the morning as newlyweds.”
Eepy let out a surprised little gasp, then kissed the top of my head before resting her cheek against it, running a hoof through my mane. “That sounds really, really nice.”
“Yeah.” My lips travelled down to the hollow of her neck. “I can sell that little bachelorette pad of mine. Use the money to help pay for sprucing this place up some. Fund some expansion so there’s a bit more room for two ponies to live here. Maybe even foals.”
“I would love that.” Eepy tightened her grip around me, gently tracing the edge of one of my ears with her lips. “We would have beautiful foals, and they would brave and strong and loving, just like you.”
“Nah.” I ran a hoof over Eepy’s chest, reveling in the silkiness of her coat and her soft, ever so slightly toned body. “Can you imagine how horrible those poor kids would turn out if they were like me? They’d be a mess. I’d rather have them like you. Gentle and kind and just completely wonderful in every way.”
“They would be the best of both of us.” Eepy ran a hoof down my back, slowly passing over my spine. “It would be so perfect.” After a couple seconds, she let out a very soft little giggle. “Rarity is going to be so upset with me when she finds out. Can you imagine? Us eloping off to Las Pegasus instead of letting her arrange a perfect storybook wedding, make gowns for both of us, and be my best mare. She might not speak to me for weeks.”
Eepy and I lay there together, dreamy smiles on our faces as we imagined the future we might have. We could do it. Just fly off to Las Pegasus, and make things official. We both wanted to do it so badly. Sure, it was sudden and spur-of-the-moment, but it’s not like it was coming completely out of left field. Hay, when I’d first moved to Ponyville I might have had one or two vague hopes that Eepy and I might pick up where we left off. Hopes that had died when I saw how bad things were between the two of us, but now we’d finally fixed that. Ponies might be shocked at how quickly we’d gone and eloped, but I don’t think anypony would be that surprised Eepy and I were tying the knot. I’d loved her since I knew what love was. Hay, there’s a reason Derpy had been worried she might be getting the boot ever since I reconnected with Eepy.
Derpy...
She’d be devastated when she got the news. The first time she’d really opened herself up to a relationship since having Dinky, and I go and marry somepony else. Blossom would be hurting too—I’d just started opening that door to her, letting myself return the love she’d been harboring for me for so long, and then I go and slam the door shut in her face. It would be hard to break the news to either of them without tearing both of their hearts to pieces, and as much as I loved Eepy, I loved them too. I didn’t want to hurt them.
I guess my thoughts must have been showing on my face, or maybe Eepy can just read me like an open book. Either way, she was giving me this sad, understanding little smile. “It would be wonderful if we could just drop everything and go to Las Pegasus to get married, but we can’t really do that, can we?”
“No.” Admitting it hurt, but the truth was the truth. “We can’t. It makes a nice fantasy, but actually going and doing that to everypony ... doing that to Blossom and Derpy...”
Eepy let out a tiny, guilty little squeak. “I couldn’t do that to them either. They’re both such nice ponies, even if Derpy was just a teeny tiny bit rude earlier.”
“So what do we do now?” I raised my head from her chest, and craned my neck to peck her on the lips. “I mean, I know I said we didn’t need to worry about the rest of the world right before we banged, but I guess if we’re being realistic about things, we can’t really avoid the issue forever. Do we...” I trailed off and let out a humorless chuckle. “Hay, I’m already stuck in a messy love triangle. It’s not like turning it into a love rhombus could make my life that much worse than it already is. Hay, you get along with Blossom and Derpy both a lot better than they get along with each other.”
“Oh. Um...” Eepy pulled back from me just a little bit, chewing on her lower lip. “That—I don’t think that would be a very good idea. Derpy seemed so upset with me earlier, and if I was really trying to take you away from her she would just be even more hurt. Blossomforth too. I just couldn’t be happy with myself if the only way I could be with you is to hurt other ponies like that.”
“Eepy, it’s ... you wouldn’t have to hurt other ponies just to make yourself happy.” I hesitated for a moment before taking the plunge. “Look, I did a bit of checking, and it would actually be legal for me to marry multiple mares if—”
Eepy gently cut me off with a hoof over my lips. “I don’t think that would work, Cloud Kicker. Derpy would be very angry with me, and Blossomforth would probably feel the same way. They’re already angry at each other too. Even if you could get everypony to agree to it, how happy would you really be with three wives who hate each other and are constantly arguing and yelling?”
Okay, that was a damn good point. Even if I got everypony signed on with the idea, it’s not like I’d be getting sexy foursomes every single night. More like having to play a constant balancing act just to keep the three of them away from each other’s throats. Not even how much Dinky would probably love having four mommies could make up for how screwed up that family dynamic would be. Especially since, as we’d just had painfully shoved into our faces, she would pick up on the fighting.
Not to mention that with three wives I could look forward to a non-stop stream of nagging and complaints. The little things are important too.
“Okay, so sharing won’t work, and you won’t break any hearts just to have me for yourself. That doesn’t exactly leave us with many other options.” I tightened my grip around her, squeezing her hard enough to draw a surprised little squeak. “I don’t wanna let you go, Eepy.”
“You have to.” Eepy leaned down and gently kissed the top of my head. “I’ll be fine, Cloud Kicker. I promise. Just knowing you’re happy is enough for me.” A very faint blush appeared on her cheeks. “And, um, there just might be somepony else that I’m just the slightest bit interested in, so you don’t need to worry that I’d be horribly heartbroken and lonely without you.” A tiny, tentative little smile appeared on her. “You keep saying I’m beautiful and kind and wonderful. If that’s really true, then I shouldn’t have any trouble finding somepony else to make me happy.”
“So you’re bowing out?” I felt tears start to sting my eyes. “Dammit Eepy. You pulling yourself out of the running because you don’t wanna win if it means breaking somepony else’s heart just makes me love you even more. I wish...” I wished a lot of things, but wishing doesn’t make it so.
“I do too.” Eepy leaned down and gently kissed around my eyes, emulating my actions from earlier in the day. “But we can’t change the past, and you can’t just run away with me to Las Pegasus to get away from your problems with Derpy and Blossomforth. You have to face this, and find a way to fix it. I’ll be there for you to help however I can, and I will always love you ... but we might have to just be friends.”
I heaved out a reluctant sigh. “Yeah. I guess so. It sucks, but you’re right.”
“But, um...” A very faint blush entered Eepy’s cheeks. “You don’t have to face it right away. We might not be able to have our entire lives together, but I think we could have just a little bit longer.” She leaned down to meet my lips, and we made the most of the time we had left together.
I was very reluctant to leave Eepy’s, but as much as I wanted to I couldn’t stay there forever. I hated walking out that door—it seemed like such a final gesture. Even through all the years of separation, I’d always expected that I’d reconnect with Eepy eventually. Now I was finally giving up on that. Closing the door, making the final curtain call. It was over. We were over.
That hurt, it really did. But at the same time, there was an odd sense of relief that I couldn’t quite shake. It seems strange to say it, but a part of me felt good about closing things out with Eepy. Yes, knowing that we wouldn’t be together was painful, but at the same time it felt oddly relieving to have finally resolved things with her. After a decade of pain at the mere thought of her, followed by weeks of uncertainty as we started reconnecting, we finally had everything sorted out in a way that left us both happy.
Yes, a part of me would always wish that we could’ve made a go of it. That we’d just decided to damn the consequences and run off to Las Pegasus together. It was a pleasant fantasy, but the harsh reality of things was that we just couldn’t go down that path. No, that’s not true. We both could have made that choice if we really wanted to. But we didn’t. I’m not sure if it was the right choice or if we’d given up on things a bit too soon, but either way it was the choice we made. Eepy and I still loved each other. We always would. We would always be there for each other, always support each other. We would always be friends.
But nothing more.
And the strangest part was, I think I was going to be okay with that. There was still a sharp pain in my heart from saying goodbye to her, but we’d closed things out just about as well as any two ponies could possibly hope to. We made our choices, and we were both okay with how it had all worked out. This wasn’t like what happened at Flight Camp, where a series of horrible misunderstandings tore the two of us apart. Instead, we sat down, looked at where we were and where we wanted to be, and made a rational decision. And then we closed things out in the best possible way, chasing away all those bad memories and all the nasty baggage of Flight Camp by making love for one last time.
Well, technically a lot more than just once, but you get the idea.
Getting rid of all that baggage was huge. I felt light, sort of like that feeling of relief after you close out a long day on patrol, come back to the barracks, and finally take off all that armor and the rest of your kit. All that weight had been there, pulling me down for so long that I’d gotten used to it being there. I didn’t even think about how heavy it all was, I just kind of accepted it and kept plodding on. Then I finally get a chance to take all that goddess-damned weight off, and suddenly all my muscles are screaming in relief, and all I can think about is how much better I feel now that all the heavy baggage I’d almost forgotten about is off my back.
So, strange as it might seem, I was actually feeling pretty good when I got back to my house. Almost optimistic, I guess would be the word. My problems weren’t all solved, far from it, but for the first time since this whole mess with Derpy and Blossom flared up I was starting to feel like maybe, just maybe, I really could find a way to deal with it all. I’d fixed things with Eepy. Compared to that how hard could it be to resolve a simple love triangle? Maybe it would get a little messy, and I might have to make some difficult choices, but I’d find a way to pull it off. Derpy and Blossom were both going to come out of this okay, and I would too.
Plus, proposing to Eepy like that might just be a sign that I was starting to get a handle on those pesky commitment issues of mine. Hay, sorting things out with Eepy was probably gonna do a lot to help with that particular set of baggage. If nothing else, it gave me one less pony to constantly waffle between and dig myself deeper with.
Yeah, I’ll admit it, I kinda got myself into this whole situation with Blossom and Derpy. I won’t say it was all my fault, but there was some pretty indisputable feather-ups on my part. Pretty much all those mistakes boiled down to one big problem: whenever I had to face up to a difficult or potentially life-altering choice I ended up in paralyzed inaction instead actually doing something about my situation. About the only times I’ve ever been good at making those big and difficult decisions is when I impulsively stumble into something like I did with Derpy and nearly did with Eepy. That, or when my inability to commit to making a big choice ends up being a pretty huge decision on its own, like bailing on the Guard.
Having things resolved with Eepy ... I dunno, I guess it was like an epiphany or something. One of those moments of clarity when you gain a new level of understanding about yourself. Yeah, I’d made some bad decisions along the way, but now that I realized what I’d done I could get to work on fixing the problem. I could start by sorting out this whole situation with Blossom and Derpy. Then I could get to work on some other big issues, like puzzling out whether I wanted to to stick with being a weather pony or see about signing on with the Guard. I guess the answer to that one would kind of depend on how things worked out with Blossom and Derpy.
I’m still not sure how it’ll play out, but for the first time in a while I felt like I had everything under control. I felt like when it came down to it, I could make the big choices, and stick to them. If nothing else, I owed Eepy a huge debt for that.
I opened up my front door, and an instant later a blur of white, pink, and green wrapped itself about me. “Well hello to you too, Blossom.” I chuckled and hugged her right back—normally getting glomped the instant I walked in the door was more of a Dinky thing, but I wasn’t gonna complain. “I guess you missed me, huh?”
A second later the sound of somepony else clearing her throat tore my attention away from Blossom. The smile on my face from Blossom’s unexpected greeting only got bigger when I saw an all too familiar light blue coat and pale purple mane. “Aunt Wind! What an unexpected...”
My smile faltered when I got a good look at Aunt Wind’s face. She didn’t look even a little bit happy to see me—in fact, she looked downright grim. My mind went a mile a minute as several unpleasant facts connected.
Aunt Wind’s a Guard counselor. Showing up at my place without a word of warning, looking as tough and stoic as I’d ever seen her. And Blossom’s hug was starting to feel less like an enthusiastic greeting, and more like a desperate clutch.
One of the things Guard Counselors have to do is comfort the family of ponies who have fallen in the line of duty. Aunt Wind tends to handle that kind of thing when it’s a Kicker who died. And now she was here.
“Aunt Wind?” I could hear the desperation and denial in my voice. “This is just an impulsive out of nowhere surprise visit, and you’re feeling grumpy ‘cause I kept you waiting, right?”
Aunt Wind very slowly shook her head. “I’m sorry, Cloud Kicker.” The bottom of my stomach dropped out. Aunt Wind didn’t leave me wondering just how horribly my life had gone off track for long. “It’s your mother. She’s missing in action.”
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CloudBlossom banter? Check.
CloudDash friend bonding moment? Check. With the perfect mix of drama and comedy? Double check.
Dinky being adinkable? Check. In spades.
Derpy knowing what went wrong? A first, but check.
Fluttershy being Fluttershy? Check.
Cloud Kicker not knowing when to stop digging? Check.
A doozy of a final line? Check.
The checklist doesn't lie, we've got another amazing chapter of Winning Pony right here.
An update !! Nice way to start th day :-P
Commence read.
1939840
Adinkable?
1940019 Dinky + Adorable
yes, an update! This makes me happy!
Edit: what a development this time...
1940021 Okay.
UPDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE!!!!!!
1940019
Adinkable. It is now a word.
1940034 Alright then.
I'm sad right now.
Not because Cloud Kicker's mom might be dead, but because of the break up.
I was rooting for Cloud Kicker and Fluttershy the whole time and THIS happens?
Kind of makes me want to stop reading, to be honest.
I know that sounds selfish of me but it feels like this fic is losing its point.
I stoped rooting for Derpy a while back, and Blossomforth is not much better (where the hell is Twi?!).
Damn I'm tired.
You know, this chapter makes me think that even if Cloud Kicker chooses Derpy, if Kicker stays friends with Blossom and Fluttershy, this probably jealousy problem will never go away, making me wonder if Derpy is going to self-sabatoge this relationship out of paranoia.
Also sucks that Kickers mom is apparently dead. She should probably go get her sister, and have her stay with her instead of Derpy now. Need all the family you can get in that situation.
Called it
Hate to say that but I knew it the second that her mom left on the mission.
Anyways nice chapter and only Cloudkicker could get emotional issues settled with Fluttershy like that
Feathering cliffhangers!
Ah crap.... Well, I saw that coming.... But still.
Poor Cloud Kicker, this is gonna hit her like a runaway locomotive....
Cloudyshy banging? Multi-check.
Oh, horse apples. We can't all be winners, can we?
For tragedy potential, this turn of events effectively tossed a hand grenade into an orphanage.
Fuck. Fuck fuckity fuck fuck shit. Ass nipples. I don't even know what those are, but fuck them. Cloud's life just got so much suck.
And 1940148:
I just lol'd. Thank you for a phrase that I am going to use all the time now.
MY SHIP HAS SUNK. Great chapter as always, but COME ON. I was well aware it wouldn't happen, but it's still a bit of a downer. Somepony needs to write a story where we actually GET CloudShy, sort of a "what if?" take. Maybe if Cloud Kicker had been involved with Fluttershy before the events of FiM and drove Twilight crazy when she actually shows up.
Stand fast, fellow DerpyKickers! Hold fast! We can weather this mad storm yet!
DecepticonsDerpyKicker forever!Looks like Cloud Kicker might actually be trying to pull herself out of the massive hole she is in, and then events just kicked her back down to the bottom where her industrial digging equipment lies.
One of the best chapters yet. You never cease to amaze me. Right when I thought things might be wrapping up in a few chapters, you throw in some more ways of branching out the story and continuing it even further. If you keep writing, I'll keep reading.
As always, looking forward to the next one!
"It certainly beat Rainbow Dash’s tiny little flank full of dense, tightly packed muscle."
Well that's certainly debatable, not that I'm offering an opinion or anything.
It's great to finally have another update. Dashie's adorableness was in full strength in this chapter, and it was great to see another moment like the end of The Apologetic Letters. Blossomforth may be gaining ground in the dumb love triangle, so that's good.
I want a fic about Kicker's parents giving her The Talk, considering that it was probably one of the pivotal moments in Equestrian history. Her copy of the Kamare Sutra would certainly be...enlightening as well. Good to see that the Rainbowpie is still going strong. Hope Rainbow can overcome her issues and all that. Dang that sucks... At least closure may be in sight.
Derpy kind of crossed a line back there, even if her concerns were entirely understandable. And Kicker, even if her thing with Fluttershy was more of a send-off to a relationship than the beginning of one, played jump rope with the line herself. Goodness, this really won't be pretty.
You must be taking lessons from George R.R. Martin with regards to Kicker's mom. Every time you start to like a character, the universe starts to hate them. Sigh...
Thanks for the update Chengar, my sister's going to have a real love/hate relationship with this one
Come on Blossomforth, you can do it.
Another awesome chapter, personaly I really hope blossom ends up with cloud kicker. It's so depressing that it takes so long for this story to update. But if that's the price I must pay for these long well written chapters, then its more than worth it.
Okay, little disappointed the herd marriage idea is tabled, but I guess you don't want to take the easy way out. It does open up some wonderful what if scenarios for one off spin off, such as:
1. What if Flutters and Cloud Kicker pulled the trigger on eloping.
2. What if all three mares went for the herd idea? What would life be like for CK as head of a multiple wife household? It sounds like a sitcom idea.
well, that last bit was certainty a blow, but not one i didn't see coming. her mom was acting strange when she dropped Alula off, and this illness that fluttershy hasn't seen; possibly a mild poison to give her mom a reason so that cloud wouldnt be suspicious?
Dat ending.
Wow, this was a very deep, emotional, and hilarious chapter... And then that ending happened :(
It's good to see that Eepy and Cloud have finally got their closure, and that they're moving on. As funny as it is to see CK get into bigger and bigger messes, I was starting to feel sorry for the pool gal.
"“Hay, I’m already stuck in a messy love triangle. It’s not like turning it into a love rhombus could make my life that much worse than it already is. " - I just about lost it at that line
Now I got like two pics I want to make for this story (one for this chapter, one for 13), plus two more from other stories. Curse this lack of free time (and willpower)!
Ooooh. Oh dear.
Does this finally make Cloud Kicker reconsider her potential in the Guard? Accepting her commission at the possibility of going on a search-and-rescue mission for her mom? Might take the story in an interesting direction, and given Kicky's epiphany about big decisions at the end of the chapter, wouldn't be outside the realm of possibility.
I never thought I'd stick with a Romance story for this many chapters... let alone with over 10,000 words each.
But there's just something so compelling about this.
I can't pinpoint what's so engaging about this story to me.
I've never 'been there' and yet, I know exactly what Cloud Kicker's talking about.
Words can't even properly describe my feelings invoked by this.
Just...
...wow.
Phenomenal chapter. I laughed, I cried, I d'awwwed
took a month or so, but the new chapter is out, and what a chapter it is!
cor blimey this is a good story
FUUUUUUUUUUUU-
I'm not sure if I want to hug Cloud Kicker or punch her in the face. This happens to me every chapter.
A great author once said she felt bad for her characters, because all she did when she wrote about them was mess up their lives. Conflict drives a story, and the bits where they're actually happy and normal are mostly boring.
Poor CK, one step back, two steps forward, three steps back, two steps forward, six steps back. What ever happened to your simple carefree life of banging? Another emotional roller coaster of a chapter, well done sir.
1940073
Pretty much how I feel. After all the twists and turns, going from supporting one pairing to another, I'd ended up being firmly in the CKxFluttershy camp for the last few chapters, the longest I'd gone without changing my mind. Derpy was getting more and more unlikeable and Blossomforth was just to much of a non-threat to think of her winning. It's... kind of sad really, that Fluttershy closed that door.
Good to see that Alula's getting better, though I really have to wonder what her mystery illness is/was. That's honestly more intriguing to me than CK's mum going MIA.
As much as I support the Cloud Kicker x Derpy ship, it was still really sad to see Cloud Kicker and Fluttershy finally close the door on that part of their lives. It's uplifting too though, as it just means a new chapter in their lives for them.
Hopefully Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash will be there to comfort Cloud Kicker now after this tragedy. But that relies on Derpy not being so jealous.
Derpy. Stoppit. It's not an attractive quality.
Feathering hell, there goes CloudShy. And apparently, Cloud Kicker's mom. As much as I love tragedy, if she actually dies, I will feel bad.
I hope she chooses Blossom. Not that I have anything against Derpy. I just think Cloud Kicker and blossomforth are a much better match.
Holy fuck they look like ducks.
Huh. So I guess I'm rooting for Blossomforth now.
1939840 Adinkable, for Dinky. Much the same as Adorkable for Twilight.
Great chapter, but Sweet Celestia, man, you can't give CK a break, can you? Finally gets things ironed out and then, BAM! Tragedy to the face. Well, I'll see what happens next chapter.
1940532
You mean you haven't been all along?
You live in interesting times, Cloudy.
1940551
It's been a complicated process, generally involving whoever is being cutest lately. But I'm never going to back the pony who tried to pick a fight with Fluttershy again, adinkable daughter or no, and Fluttershy herself has thrown in the towel, so Blossomforth it is.
My birthday was five days ago... this must be a late present.
I accept it, wholeheartedly, sir...
I love that we got an update on Rainbow Dash and Pinkie. The fact that Pinkie has been with Cloudkicker is a "non surprise surprise". It makes sense on many levels though I have no doubt that Pinkie if offered would love to be with Dash and would allow Dash enough time to make sex enjoyable for both.
While Fluttershy and kicker is cute I am glad it is looking over now. I am still hoping for Blosssom though every time I do I feel sad because Derpy is such a sympathetic character.
Chengar, you're an awesome guy, but that is really low. Is it that hard to just let Cloud Kicker be happy for even half a chapter? I mean, she finally patches things up with Fluttershy, and you throw that at her? Next chapter we'll probably find out that Alula's dying from whatever sickness she has, and I won't even be surprised.
I've said it before, but there'll be a fun conversation on the horizon.
CK, has confessed to Blossom and insisted that they take the mature and rational (if chafing to all) approach of sitting down together and discussing what's fair in this situation. When confronted with Blossom's advances, has put them to bed for a time with the promise that the discussion would come soon, with fair hearing, as to do anything else would be to damage a fragile situation.
Then she has sex with Fluttershy, who is in a virtually identical situation, without any such considerations. After her breaking her rules to have sex with Fluttershy before (results notwithstanding) and not breaking them for Blossom, hurt Blossom greatly to the point of her threatening to break off their friendship.
There's no way this will end without an "It's my turn" demand from Blossom when she learns about it, assuming she doesn't just walk away. To say nothing of if she and/or Derpy learn of the eloping idea.
To say nothing of Derpy explicitly stating that she was angry at the thought of CK and Fluttershy having sex without her consent not two minutes before they did exactly that.
Cloudkicker digs herself a deeper hole. "Ah, such refreshing shade!"
And her mom missing == Alula with her permanently == advantage Derpy.