• Published 1st Aug 2015
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Life of a Wanted Changeling Season 3: Tyrants, Terrorists, and Tiaras, Oh My! - Down with Chrysalis



The continued adventures of you, Bugze the Changeling! (Comment-Driven Story)

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Episode 15: On the Road Again

Everfree Forest

After a few hours of walking in what you think is Southwest, the trees don’t seem any less thick. You had Nightshade stay in the Inventory with some recently added film reels you got from the Vaults collection.

“Can’t believe Grandbuggy had extended editions of the Lord of the Horn Rings and The Hobbit Films, and every single movie in the Godzilla franchise, that will keep her busy for at least two days,” you say aloud.

Sigh, look I don’t mind her staying in her room away from this forsaken forest, but you are going to turn her into a mindless blob looking at those reels, admonishes your recently returned backseat driver.

“Oh calm down, hours of nothing but marathoning movies never hurt anyone…and even as I say that…”


Inside the Inventory

Nightshade watches slack jawed as the king of the monsters…gives a flying/sliding drop kick to Megalon while Jet Jaguar holds him in place…twice.

“Whelp, no need to hold onto those physics lessons Ms. Cheerilee taught me,” she says as she literally forgets everything about the science.


Back Outside

A shiver of irony rolls over you.

Uh huh…Selena deadpans.

“Quiet you! Anyway, any news on our “Guest’s” condition?”

Let me check, she says as she is silent for a spell. After about 30 seconds, she returns. Same as before, still out cold.

“What took you so long?” you ask.

It’s not as if he is right next to me. My safeguards and traps keep him deep in your subconscious to pose less of a threat.

“Oh, well alright then,” you say cheerfully as you continue on your way.

After another long while of walking without hindrance, you can’t help but let your mind wander.

“You know, I’m surprised we’ve gone this long without finding any monsters.”

BrownDog’s Comment

Suddenly, in front of you, a black vine with a venus flytrap like head pops up. It’s like the one that knocked you out after you abandoned your old hive mates to their fate.

You just had to tempt it didn’t you? Selena snarks.

Just like the last one, the vine spits out a gas at your face, but this time you are prepared.
Thanks to your awesome mask with its filtered air, you do not breathe any of the toxin in. The plant tilts it’s stalk in what you swear is a confused manner as you chuckle and bring out your powerglove.

“Very unfortunate…for you. Would you kindly burn?”
And you turn the offending vine into ash.

“Man this mask is awesome. Also, I didn’t even think you could make breathing air feel so clean. Wonder why Grandbuggy had it in the first place though…” you muse.

You mentioned before that he was fond of cigars, you think that might have something to do with this?

“Nah, Grandbuggy could still outrun me without breaking a sweat. Maybe it was a trophy from a foe or something.”

Whatever the case, it still is fearsome.

“I know right?”

But that’s another thing, for our foes the teeth will strike fear, but what of the normal peasantry? How do you believe they will handle your visage?

“Oh I’m sure they’ll think it’s awesome,” you declare with a smile, before entering a clearing and seeing a bunch of buildings.
“Hey look a town…”



A Few Moments Later

SnapDrake’s Comment

We now see you walking along the edges of the Everfree away from the town with and angry look on your face

“Well that was a bust,” you mope as you trudge along.

Well what did you expect from those pathetic fools, you look like a beast.

“Yeah, but still it’s just a mask, doesn’t mean they had to deny me food and hotel room dang it!”

We wouldn’t have been able to afford a room with our lack of funds, she points out.

“Yeah, well…it’s the principle of the matter. If it weren’t for those stupid three overreacting flower mares, then the rest of the town wouldn’t have shut themselves inside and avoided me!”

Do those three weaklings from Ponyville have relatives in every settlement or something?

“I don’t know, but still, stupid judging ponies. I bet if a Zebra walked into town they’d freak out.”

Well on the plus side, at least we know that you are intimidating.

“Yeah I expected that, but I didn’t think I’d make a whole town feel so…uncomfortable. How am I going to collect money if no one wants to talk to me?”

Perhaps all you have to do is cover your teeth when talking to the peasantry, and only bare your teeth for the enemy?

“That sounds like a plan…but with what? Noling is exactly going to sell me anything,” you pout.

You try to think of something, but ultimately decide to just avoid towns until you reach Dodge Junction and then you’ll figure it out.



A Few Days Later

You finally arrive in Dodge Junction. You know this because of the sign on the outskirts of town that says, Welcome to Dodge Junction.

“Well isn’t that conveniently placed,” you say before narrowing your eyes in determination.

“Now, it's time to find some bulls, You better watch out, outlaws," you whisper to yourself as you approach the small town. "Because I’m coming for ya. That's right. The... uh…” you stop in place as you realize you still haven’t come up with a name for your new persona.

“The…something or other. Eh, I'll figure it out later. But I’m still coming!” you say as you continue walking.

Aren’t you forgetting something? asks Selena.

“Like what?” you say obliviously.

You’re teeth, she points out.

You look back down at your awesome mask.

“Oh right…” you take the mask off and look it over.

“What to do, what to do, what to…say, what’s this?”

BrownDog’s Comment

In examining the mask, you find that there is a thin slit in the casing above the teeth. Following the slit, you find a very missable button on one of the top right jawline.

“Oooo, mystery button!” you shout in excitement and press it.
When you do, a dark marron sheet of metal slides over the top teeth, while a another slides from below over the bottom ones making it look like a smooth mask.

“Whoah. OK, now how do I get the teeth back?” you press the button again, and the sheets retract, showing your snarling mask once more.

“Huh, guess I have the ability to bare my teeth off and on, and not a moment too soon,” you say as you cover them up again and put the mask back on.

You know, as unlucky as you are, it amazes me how many convenient coincidences there are surrounding you.

“What? Like deciding to become a bounty hunter and having a bounty hunter bingo book at my disposal?”

Exactly. Which also makes me think… she tapers off in thought.

“What?”

Marunse’s Comment

Hmm...How long ago was the base built? she asks.

“I have no clue, whenever Grandbuggy had time I guess.”

Yes, but how long has it been since you’ve seen him? Since he left that note for you?

“Umm…” you start thinking about when he was banished, plus your time in the army, and then your time running around as a fugitive.

“About four to five years? Why do you want to know?”

Surely the hit-list would be outdated by now right? She points out.

“...” your jaw hangs open at this revelation.

In the distance through time and space you hear an evil feminine chuckle.

“...Buck you Lady Luck,” you groan.

You look back down at the bingo book, and see there is no date on it. For all you know, some of these criminals could already have been captured.

You look back up to the town.

“Well, only one way to find out,” you say as you trot into town.

BrownDog’s Comment

As you walk into town, you see that it’s a pretty nice looking place. It reminds you a lot of…Appleloosa. You give a sigh remembering your old home, but push on.

As you walk, some ponies will give you a double take, or will stare for a bit before minding their own business. No one is scared of your covered mask.
Smiling at your little victory, you look at your options.

“OK, gotta find a pony who looks like they know the land and if the bulls are still a threat” you say as you look around. In the distance at the outskirts of towns is a large cherry orchard. Looking around at the civilians, you see a white mare with fancy red hair and a cherry cutie mark loading up barrels of cherries into a wagon.

“Bingo,” you says as you trot over. “Excuse me, Miss?” you call out and tap her shoulder.

She turns around and looks at you, “Oh hello there. What can I do for you?” she asks in a fancy western accent.

“Oh, well you see, I was wondering if…” you start before she interrupts.

“Oh my, what a soothing voice you have,” she says staring at your mask.

“Um…thank you?” you say unsurely.

“If I may be so bold, what is with that fancy mask stranger?” she asks curiously.

“It’s a breathing apparatus,” you say in your smooth metallic voice.

“Oh, do you have asthma or something?” she asks..

“Something like that,” you mutter, “but anyway do you know if any bu…”

“How do you eat with that thing on?” she asks interrupting you again to which you sigh at.

It seems by not being fearsome, you have gained the attention of the inquisitive smirks Selena

“If I tell you, will you answer a question of mine?” you drawl.

“Oh, I’m sorry sir. Just a might curious is all, I’ll answer your question first if you like.”


“Nah it’s alright, firstly, I eat like this,” you say as the two jaws of the mask open, revealing your real mouth underneath. Thankfully the shadows hide your true changeling teeth.

“Wow, that’s quite a gadget you got there,” she says impressed while you close the mask.

“I know right?”

“Oh, and where are my manners, I am Cherry Jubilee, and you are…?” she asks as she reaches out to shake your hoof.

“I’m…hblzidopy,” you mumble in a low voice as you shake her hoof.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch…”

“Anyway, I heard that there’s a problem around these parts with a gang of bulls…” you interrupt her.

“Oh, you mean them Cattle Rustlers? Yeah, you could say we have a problem with them dang bovines,” she spits.

“Oh so they’re still around?”

“I should say so. Running around these parts for who knows how long. It makes delivering cherries that much more complicated.”

“So just to be clear, these are the same Bulls right?” you ask showing her the pictures in the bingo book.

“Well that looks like the wanted posters they got up,” she says examining them. “Oh, are you one of them Bounty Hunters?” she asks.

“Of Course,” you say smoothly.

“Well you might want to go speak to the sheriff then, he could give you more info. But I’d be weary, those bulls are a might strong.”

“Don’t worry miss. If all goes according to plan, they’ll be out of your mane, and I’ll have my awesome coat.”

“Huh?”

“I mean money, money is what I meant…yeah…”

“Well alright then, good luck to you sir. And would you like to buy some cherries while you’re here?”

“Yeah, alright, how much can I get for a pearl?” you ask bringing out one of few gems you have left.


After buying 10 personal boxes of cherries, you went to the Sheriff’s office, but there was a sign on the door that said “Out to Lunch, Be Right Back,” on it. So seeing as how you have a moment, you sit down and eat some your cherries while reading through a Newspaper you found in front of the door.



Michael Beigh to direct 3 More Transformares Movies After House Explodes.

Following the mysterious destruction of the director’s house in Manehattan, Michael Beigh has declared that A new Trilogy of the highly grossing but critically panned films will be made, much to the outcry of fans everywhere.

“My muse cannot be silenced. When a muse delivers wonderful wonderful dynamite into your home at 7:30 in the morning, you do not ignore it!” he exclaimed to the confusion of reporters.

“These movies are going to make sooo much money, and have lots of explosions and hard to see action scenes! And Shia LaHoof will be returning!”

At this declaration, a unified scream of “NOOOOO!!!!” Echoed across the world. When asked what the plot of the films will be, Mr. Beigh simply looked at the reporter in a confused manner and asked,

“Plot?”

So there you have it folks, more horrible films that will keep making money because moviegoers have not learned their lessons.


You grit your teeth in anger.

“Oh come on! Seriously? I mean, we all learned our lesson with M. Night Shamalamadingdong, why can’t we make this guy go away?”

Must you really waste valuable anger and worrying on a horrible artist? Selena asks.

“Of course! Because If I don’t then he wins!” you shout aloud, while nearby ponies give you funny stares.

“I swear, I will end him one day!” you growl.

“Who you talking about ending son?” comes a weathered inquisitive voice, causing you to look up at a grisled old stallion with a sheriff star on his vest.

“Oh, noling! Just venting about Michael Beigh.”

“Ah, alright then,” he says in understanding.

“Now, what is an all red garbed pony in a breathing mask doing in front of my station?”

“Well you see, I’m kind of a bounty hunter, and well, I heard that the Cattle Rustlers were still at large,” you say as you hold up your bingo book.

“Ah, those dang slabs of beef have been a thorn in my side for a long time. Heck, their influence goes all the way to the Pepper farmers further on West.”

You hand him the bingo book, “And are these all the members in the gang?” you ask.

He looks it over. “Yeah, pretty much. Oh and you got all the other most wanted on this list. That’s handy”

“Alright, well I’m going to stop them and bring them in,” you say.

“Really? Just you by yourself?” he asks.

“Y-yeah?” you answer.

He just shakes his head, “Well good luck to you son,” he says as he walks inside.

“What, you’re not going to help?” you ask.

“What, an old stallion and a green as grass bounty hunter against 7 nasty bulls? Yeah no, I don’t like them odds.”

“Hmmph, I’m a lot tougher than you think,” you declare.
He just shakes his head and pulls out a map and hands it to you.


“If you’re serious, head here,” he says putting an X on a point in a nearby Canyon.

They got a safehouse out there. Sometimes they stop there for rest and supplies and to regroup.

“Wait, if you know where they go, why haven’t you brought them in?”

“Because I’m too old and fat, and I don’t have the horsepower. And all them fancy folk in Canterlot can’t spare some troops because of the dang Hooded Offender, them follower nutjobs of his, and Changelings.”

“Oh…well…thanks,” you say as you shuffle out the door.

Hmmph, what a coward. A constable in the olden days would have gathered his own militia to take on foes such as these, Selena chides.

“Well I’m glad he didn’t, otherwise I wouldn’t be getting paid. And thanks to him, I know this Bingo Sheet is more or less up to date.”

You then look over the map and narrow your eyes as you look in the direction you have to go.

“Now, let’s go find this Safe House…”



Meanwhile

TheRutherford’s Comment

A young adult Wyvern (looks like a dragon with wings on its arms) is sitting in his house waiting on some other members to show up for Game/Movie Night.
“Ugh, where the heck are Kichi and Kersey? Hope they didn’t forget,” he ponders before shaking his head. “Nah, we’ve got Python’s Blessed Chalice and Them’s Fighting Herds on the venue tonight, no way they’d forget. Kersey's probably still eating.”
As he sits there waiting, a letter is pushed through his mail slot.

“Hmm a letter. Maybe it's from one of the other Generals finally calling me into action. Maybe they found that filly we need to get…although I'm still confused why we need some random kid. Seems wrong....oh well plot progression I suppose.”
He opens the envelope with a claw, pulls out the message.

“It better not be Brown Dog and Snap Drake asking for money again, seriously, how the heck do you screw up killing Michael Bay? You need Ice Guys, Ice! And or Good Writing.”
Thankfully, the writing belongs to another general so he reads on.

Dear Mr. The Rutherford,
Hey Bud, It's me. You know how I kind of took a hiatus because of the strange dreams of the end of the world and fighting Daleks, and the Hooded Offender killing everyone? The dreams tat were like memories, but I’d never actually lived through them? You know, the same dreams/memories you started having whenever I talked about them that we can’t explain? Well I started writing them down and guess what, I realized we could make a killing by making a movie out of it. So I'm putting a movie together to bring them to life. I think I’ll tone it down a bit though so that way these ponies won't see everything die (They can be so squeamish), but I think that it will make a lot of money, and or get some awards. Anyway I figured it would be fun. Do you want to come help me out here in Applewood? If this goes right, maybe the Real Hooded Offender will like and will come back and lead us as opposed to those nutjobs from Fillydelphia. Let me know soon.
Your Favorite Timberwolf,
Solarkness

The dragon looks up from the letter in thought.
“Huh… I wonder how he got that story approved? Those dream memories, or whatever they heck they were were disturbing, so how would a Pony Studio make such a thing?” Just thinking about them causes Rutherford to flash to a scene of a monster Hooded Offender fighting King Sombra. “Stupid flashes…oh well…” Rutherford just shrugs his shoulders.
“I guess I will have to ask him how he got this project going. I don’t really have anything better to do anyway. I'll leave soon....well as soon as I finish Game/Movie Night. I just hope Kersey gets here soon. I know he went to clean out an all you can eat buffet first. Wonder if he wants to go too? Would Kichi? Better ask.”




Later That Night With You

After wandering through the desert bluffs for a few hours, it’s night time, and a full moon is up. You have found the safe house. You stand a hoofball field’s distance away from it as you notice that there is a light in the window, and smoke coming from the chimney.

“Alright that’s gotta be it,” you mutter.
Be positive first Bugze, don’t run in their without knowing the situation, she advises.

You nod and use your Zoom Sight to get a better view.

In the window, you see two bulls sitting at a table playing cards. If there are more, you do not know. As your head starts hurting, you look at the house and it’s surroundings and you see a laundry line with several pieces of clothing hanging up.
Including a certain Red Coat that you’ve been obsessing over.

You unzoom your vision, and through your headache your smile widens immensely, as you let out a very cheerful sound.

“Squee.”

What Do You Do?

Author's Note:

Time for some good old fashion western fighting...or smack talk. Either or really.

Hey Hive Mind, DWC here!

First of all I would like to apologies for the lateness of this chapter, finales have been getting to me and I couldn't focus on writing at all. Which is way this chapter is brought to you by our ever so helpful editor, BrownDog. Praise him as if he is the sun for he wrote this chapter from scratch for me while I was busy doing the worst thing ever, studying.

Anyway, this is the part were I usually list the names that could be chosen for something. But this is goanna be different this time. I found this great site called StrawPoll that'll allow anyone to make their own poll for anything! I've decided to test it out by letting you guys vote on Bugze's newest name.

SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR! CLICK HERE TO VOTE!

Voting shall end on December 18th, when finales are over and I can (hopefully) get back to writing. Also, I would like to say that soon Star Wars Episode 7 will be out, and when it does I'm goanna post a blog wishing everybody a great viewing and to praise the force!

Till then, see ya!

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