The Gas Mask Brigade Saves Equestria

by Mr Anomalous

Debugging the Cosmos, Part I

"There is no land beyond the law where tyrants rule with unshakable power!
'Tis but a dream from which the evil wake to face their fate; their terrifying hour!"
—The Sandman

Sometimes Twilight felt like there were faces in the woodwork and the stone around her. On particularly restless nights, she could see them—count them, even. Sometimes they even talked. Mostly, they were mean and nasty. Most likely to go alonside their ugliness, with their odd features, their asymmetrical eyes and nostrils. Many of them even were even missing bits.

Regardless, Twilight's most recent concoction—a sort of potion that not only helped her get to sleep, but practically knocked her out entirely—was appearing to be working well.

See, it was not only the faces on the walls and ceilings around her that kept her up at night: it was the shadows cast by the trees and buildings outside and the sounds they made; it was the tasks she was to complete tomorrow; it was the books she was reading and the ones she was planning to read; it was music, it was gardening, it was fictional beasts and entities; magic, science, math, history . . . yes, a very heavy "sleeping aid" was called for indeed. And now, the fact that she was Princess meant that she was developing a very deep connection with the ground beneath her and the world around her. She could . . . sense things she never was able to before.

Spike didn't understand all the fuss. He could fall asleep in seconds. Twilight, however, often was awak 'till two or three, regardless of what time she was going to wake up tomorrow.

Not anymore! With her estimations, Twilight thought that it would take a very heavy disturbance—be it physical or magical—to rouse her from her newly found deep sleep.

She was right.

It took a very, very severe break in the way that things should work to wake her. And it happened on her fourth night of the best sleep she got since she was a filly.

Well, half a good night.

It took place at twelve o'one—precisely—and Twilight discovered a flaw in her potion; the sort of tiredness brought about by an interruption wrought by it was a profound sort that lasted weeks.

But it didn't matter: she was a Princess, and no matter how tired she was, she had to investigate such disturbances.

And it didn't take place in the Everfree Forest, which was surprising.

"Coffee?" Spike muttered, more of a statement than a question. Twilight accepted gratefully; no sugar or cream, hot and fresh.

Soon, Twilight was levitating three or four mugs of caffeine in her aura. It was only then that she could muster the engergy to speak.

Between long, gaping yawns, she monotoned that something had broken. She wasn't sure exactly where, but it was a distance away, up near the Hollow Shades and the Foal Mountains. Spike sleepily wrote all this down as, naturally, it had to be sent to Princess Celestia.

But before the letter could be finished, one arrived.

"Ah. Of course, Celestia will have sensed this, too. How silly of me," Twilight said, grasping the scroll with her magic and opening it.

Then she frowned. The letter was not from Celestia: it was from Princess Luna.

Twilight had never received a letter from her before. . . .

But then she realized: Hollow Shades: the home of the bat ponies.

Twilight dove into the the letter. Luna, it turned out, was the first to sense the disruption. But neither she nor Princess Celestia could pinpoint what it was. All they knew was this: very little magic was involved—an infinitesimal amount, considering the rupture—and it had happened—mostly—from outside.

Some force inside Equestria had helped.

"Spike," Twilight said; "Make all the coffee we have."

The little dragon groaned, but waddled of to do his duty.

Twilight finished her fourth mug and selected a few select tomes from the shelves.

"'Long night ahead' doesn't even describe the beginning of it," she murmured.

- - - - -

"It is a 'category three' sort of portal, a mist-like degradation of the space between the entrance and ze exit. Whatever this ees, it took it's time with its forming. I, however, question how such an anomaly could occur in the grand domain of Zee Captein!"

"Well bloody hell, what's goin' on down there?"

"Well, most likely somesing from ze Centroid. Yes: The Centroid; that blasphemous place outside of normal space in times; ze center of chaos. Also known as: The Only Place Not In Captaina. It does not deserve to be part of zat glorious, multi-dimensional empire!"

"The Centroid? God damn it all; not those buggers again. . . ."

"Vell, zey are ze lords and masters of all that your tiny mortal minds can grasp, and far beyond zat, of course. Zee only reason ve are still alive after dealing vis zem before is because ve haven't gone up against the two big ones. And me, of course. It is fun to toy with them. Perhaps I should summon the painos. . . ."

"And those two aren't the masterminds behind this little 'portal?'" said a third voice.

"I don't sink so."

"Oh boy," said a fourth, "more of Nyarlathotep's buddies, hm?"

"Yes."

"Have we . . . ever been here before?"

"Ve have not. However, I know what it is. 'Tiz the grandest and most glorious and the most juiciest of places, especially for winter wrap-ups! Ze planet is called Equis!"

"'Equis,' is it? Interesting. This is rather far out, a long ways from home."

"Pah, you're tellin' me?"

"Ze breach is small, gentlemen. And zee inhabitants of ze nation around it have four very powerful rulers, deities, almost. But zey won't hold zeese things at bay forever. Which is why they need me."

"Us, Captian: us. Pah. How long do we have then, eh?"

"I don't know."

"Roight, well, I say we get some food in our bellies and then head on down there, guns a'blazing."

"That's probably not the best of ideas."

"Well, yeah, but . . . you know what I mean."

"Mmmmmph mmmmmmmph!"

"Vell zat settles it then," said The Captain, "We go in . . . two hours? After I go check on the sappy-chaps and make sure they are doing the jobs I so graciously assigned them."

"Yeah, sure."

"Mmph!"

"I'll make some tea."

Author's Note:

If you want to see your favorite gas mask wearing hero (or anti-hero) make a cameo, please: tell me! I just chose these as a sort of leader group; they are not the only ones. . .

Comments

[Gear and Bow]

You have sparked my interest sir.

[The outcast]

DC Universe? As in Superman and all those guys? Or something else I'm not aware of?

[Mr Anomalous]

6256474 Top left of the cover image, sir: Wesely Dodds, the Sandman.

[MemeShitlord]

ZE CAPTAIN?! I will read this later...

[Emerald Harp]

We have not a clue what's going on, but this is very intriguing.

[Carrara]

6256474
There probably someone with a gas mask. I mean, there are just so many...

[Mr Anomalous]

6256637
Why not now??

[re- Yamsmos]

>not having an NCR Ranger

[mrkillwolf666]

more plz

[Technopathic]

Are you planning to add the empty child too?
manapop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/Are-you-my-mummy.jpg

[IncandescentSolaire]

We need Hunk from resident evil.
Other then that,
The story is magnificent.

[Fading Soul]

NO ARTYOM FROM METRO?! HERECY! DISLIKE! (just kidding, I love it. But still. Artyom would be a great addition.)

[Fading Soul]

Him. img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100415014837/metro2033/images/d/d0/Artyom.jpg

[Mr Anomalous]

6257856 Perhaps. . . .

[Mr Anomalous]

6257872
Suggestion noted.

[Mr Anomalous]

6258013 This is only the beginning. . . .

[Fading Soul]

6258154 Still, if there is any fighting, he will be a big help. Man of the metro can take down the biggest of mutants.

[Saint Henry The Pig]

6258154

you should use the Miner from my bloody Valentine.
He's very strong like jason and others combined.

[Mr Anomalous]

6258439 One problem: said miner is evil.

Hm. Perhaps there could be an opposition.

[gopnikpony]

A group of gas mask wearing STALKERs from well... S.T.A.L.K.E.R.

[Saint Henry The Pig]

6258478

See, you can find away around the problem as you are technically the "God" of the world you have created through your writings...Or maybe you can redirect him, making him think that he is killing random people but Is actually kill the bad guys...After all much like Jason they will kill whoever is in their way...There are many opposition...

[thegreenhood]

psycho mantis, maybe?

[Discord214]

Krieg the psycho from Borderlands 2.

[Dustchu]

"It is a 'category three' sort of portal, a mist-like degradation of the space between the entrance and ze exit. Whatever this ees, it took it's time with its forming. I, however, question how such an anomaly could occur in the grand domain of Zee Captein!"

You made me happy with this! I love that comic!

Ohh Captain, you silly.

Nice job! Hahaha

[Atomic_furry]

6257856
Isnt the empty child like a virus (havnt watched dr who in a while )

[unbounded]

HOW ABOUT BOLS FROM AKAME GA KILL!

Oh wait... He's dead...