Looking cool so far dood. The only thing I would consider doing is making the interviewee montage longer (because those are hilarious) and have Pinkie appear somewhere in the middle of the montage as well, to satisfy the comedy rule of three.

>>638472638472 I'm honestly not sure how I could stretch the montage any longer, I'm out of questions. Don't worry about the rule of three though

>>638847638847

Well, you could have Berry Punch show up drunk. That'd be funny.

>>638859638859 Good idea! I just slipped her in there ;)

This sounds like fun.

I'll give it a looksee.

That gave me a good chuckle, I'm definitely interested to see where you'll go with this. The lyra opening killed me, blank staring Trixie down. Classic

Oh, goody. Either she's

a) trying to get her own flank in the big chair

b) she's one of Luna's spies (Luna being good but not THAT good)

c) she's one of Chrysalis's spies.

d) she thinks Corona is just misunderstood.

or

e) She's somepony we've met before.

>>640342640342 She can't be Twilight because this story is set before Boast Busted

>>639624639624 Hope you like it!

>>640224640224 Thanks! Glad you like my pre-opening stinger. If I do other Lunaverse story I'll certainly use that format.

This looks like it'll be good!

This looks pretty good but I noticed a few spelling errors here and there. If you'd like I could PM you with them or post them here in the comments, not sure what you'd prefer.

One does not simply decline Pinkie Pie

This is great so far; do go on, good Sir.

Really?  I'm going to be the first to say it?

Well, okay...

Image: http://i.imgur.com/Y7I8G.png

THAT MOONDANCER'S A SPY!

*Please insert Team Fortress 2 meme here*

Hmm, methinks moondancer is up to no good.

*Everyone looks to Striker, with this expression *

Okay, funny montage there. Although I have an odd feeling Pinkie would've been perfect for the job.

Hee hee, loved it.

but I would find it hilarious if there is nothing wrong with Moondancer.

or if there is, Pinky ends up with the job

Quite good. Could use a quick proofread. I'm at work on my phone right now but I'll post some edit notes after I get home tonight. As long as Mr. Spiced Rum doesn't end up monopolising my time..

>>640833640833 & >>642203642203 I've corrected a few typos someone pointed out but if you find anything glaring don't worry about pointing them out. I'm not actually a native english speaker AND I tend to type fast AND write late at night while sleepy AND my keyboard has a few tricky keys, bad combo. Sometimes I type a completely different word from what I intended to... I don't always catch those mistakes sadly.

>>641029641029 Thank you

>>641074641074>>641632641632 I expected those sooner

Thank you everypony else for the good words!!

>>641845641845

Sorta' wondering why she was even applying. She has a job with the Cakes, after all...

OR DOES SHE?

(Hey, if you're writing a story for the Lunaverse, you're making the canon just as much as me...)

>>640612640612

By the way, I don't suppose choosing Moondancer was due to that Londo to Vir quote I posted in the List of Ideas thread, was it?

i.e., "What is it now, you moon-faced assassin of joy?"

Probably just a coincidence and me reading too much into things.

>>643084643084 Maybe subconsciously. I just like the name really plus she's someone who 'exists' in the canon-verse. Even if we never saw her.

>>643084643084 Good to hear! *Scribbles down note for 'Ill Communication'

>>643115643115 Can't wait to read your story!

>>643148643148 Thanks. I can't wait to write my story.

>>643076643076

EDIT:

Good job on getting an editor, and good job on editing, FredMSloniker. The chapter reads more smoothly now.

Trixie is a complete ass! I love it! I don't think I was particularly good at getting that idea across in LNLD, so this is really helping to remind us that even in different universes, there are constants...A is still A...and Trixie is still Trixie. And Trixie, I see you've you've acquired a book on transmogrification ever since the, ah...well. You and Lyra will be on speaking terms for "Boast Busted," anyway.

(On that note I actually like that entire bit. All sorts of little bits and pieces for prospective or existing authors to plug in, in order to make a more complete universe).

I do wonder what Trixie did during Winter Wrap Up...for some reason I can see her with Rarity, actually, making bird nests. Perhaps on directive from Luna, who'd still want her to make up with Rarity and the Apples for the Longest Night fiasco, even if she is more or less forgiven.

And as for Moondancer, or should I say, Zizanie...a quick Google search reveals zizanie to be French for "ill feeling, fued, or rivalry." Interesting, very interesting indeed...she may be some kind of spy or something but right now my sympathies are sort of with her, due to Trixie being an ass. And I sympathize with her over Trixie's eating habits...which I will explain, eventually, I actually do have an explanation for it that makes a degree of sense.

I'm right now wondering if "Discordian scum" is a generic insult or a specific jab at her. Screwball's long-lost sister? Tainted lineage is mentioned, but then again insofar as Blueblood is concerned that could mean anything.

And Prince Blueblood...well well well. Viscount, eh? That's a step up from the former Baron. Good for you! What's got your knickers in a twist, though?

>>652766652766 All I'll say is:

Nice, this is shaping up to be pretty interesting.

Ooooh, this is good! I can't wait to find out what happens next!

Dammit Trixie, why are your eating habits so... "exotic"?

I hope that "Moondancer" has something really evil planned.  After Trixie's treatment, she could spend the next few chapters punching puppies in face and  I'd still feel sorry for her.    

Loved it. Trixie is gloriously Trixie here, yet we know by now she's not a complete bitch... just an insufferable one to work for heh. Love those little details your leaving, paying it forward for new authors to work off of Really cool of you to do.

I know 'moondancer' is up to no good but I still feel for her in a way, with having Trixie (and Blueblood as well in a way) as boss. Mystery still lingers though... definitely looking forward to more.

...and the plot thickens.  I must say, while I figured she was lying about her background, I was quite surprised to find that even her name is fake, since Moondancer is an actual name from the show.  Also, something involving Blueblood, wonder if it's just typical Night Court political shenanigans or something deeper.

Anyway, loved Trixie being a thoughtless ass and showing off her unique tastes in food, especially when the two intersect with the Coffee scene.

I'm not sure I much agree with your interpretation of Rainbow Dash though.  From what I observed, I had thought that she often showed up late, left early, and was generally unavailable when not officially on call, but that she didn't usually skip whole days at a time, especially not multiple times per week.

>>653327653327

Mabye she's just particularly bad this month or something.

>>653327653327>>653672653672 Or maybe Trixie is just exagerating about missing entire days instead of, say, an afternoon

>>653689653689

Well, RD was certainly missing on the days leading up to the LNLD, which I can't imagine a weather manager is supposed to take off...

As weather manager, though, I imagine she can write her own schedule. So it wouldn't surprise me if she only schedules herself for, like, one day a week at max and then has herself "on call" for all the others. Or something.

Well, the plot thickens! Blueblood conspiring here. We see some of the first hints of the cutthroat nature of the Night Court. Moondancer... yeah. Trixie's tastes are... bucked up.

>>653672653672>>653689653689

I figure Rainbow spent the time trying to seduce Con Mane and steal the plans for the Orbital Harmony Laser.

Also, Pia Ikea is now Lunaverse canon

>>653702653702 My guess is that Rainbow Dash has a bad tendancy to change her schedule at the last minute.

>>653760653760

I feel I missed something with that reference.

>>653794653794

Pia Ikea, the Ikea pony. Trixie's cabinet sounds like it came from an Ikea.

>>653833653833 Oh my god the joke about the Quill & Sofa guy stealing the pencils to sell them is HILARIOUS.

A now for the oh so annoying wate between chapters.

>>653702653702 >>653765653765

Hmm, yes Rainbow setting her own hours and changing them last minute is definitely more like what I had been working with.  Also, good point on Trixie is probably exaggerating, though given that the reports she files apparently affect Dash's pay, I find myself feeling a little sorry for Rainbow.  Then again maybe part of the reason she's been getting away with her work habits so long is that the Night Court representative exaggerating stuff like that is nothing new to Trixie's time in the position, and so the higher ups gloss-over/ignore most of those reports.

>>654239654239 Well Trixie doesn't decide on Rainbow Dash's pay, she just reports on changes in schedule. In my mind the weather patrol gives Trixie their schedule in advance and she passes it along to the central weather bureau along with the rest of her paperwork so if there is last minute changes to it she has to report them.

This is a pretty intense chapter! I'm so glad I don't work for Trixie. You've done a great job with Trixie's weird appetite, too. And possible Discord influence? The plot thickens...

And here we are folks! Last chapter of my little story. I hope you're not dissapointed! I know it was short but I always intended it to be a short story. the only thing I feel could have used to be showcase would be Pokey Pierce's predisposition for bad puns. I think it's a fun character trait for a guy who started as a visual gag.

Now just like RainbowDoubleDash released the Lunaverse to the care of others, I have no problem with anypony else using Zizanie in their Lunaverse story! Have fun with her

I Iove the fact that Zizanie thought that Trixie was intentionally being a jerk, only for Trixie to completely wreck that theory.

This, this changes things.

I see you've kept the fine Lunaverse tradition of every villain escaping

Kidding aside though this was a pretty enjoyable story, that made for a lot or world building. Trixie was gloriously trixie as always but she's taking baby steps at becoming a better pony at least. The climax was pretty cool, always been a fan of illusionist in a battle setting.

Zazine is an interesting character of dubious origins and thought she's not avialble for later use we well... we don;t quite know what she is should be interesting to see what people come up with. That and Blueblood looming in the background for some inevitable Night Court Intrigue.

Overall though good job Fizzy

>>660551660551 Yeah I love that joke.

>>660558660558 Yeah, with Snails that gives us two male characters added to the secondary characters line up!

>>660589660589 It's Zizanie, not Zazine thanks for the good words

i believe this is all i have to say:

Image: http://i1162.photobucket.com/albums/q531/ADemonicPresence/83058_-_Discord_animated_excellent_go_on_proceed.gif

>>660693660693 What could you POSSIBLY mean by that dear?

huh...

wait...

“Not really, no. You see, my special talent is the ability to pierce anything with my horn! I am constantly looking for new challenges, perfecting my sharpening spell, and I won’t stop until I’ve pierced the heavens themselves! Rocks are already beginning to be too easy for me.”

“I am constantly looking for new challenges, perfecting my sharpening spell, and I won’t stop until I’ve pierced the heavens themselves!”

“I won’t stop until I’ve pierced the heavens themselves!”

......

Pokey Pierce sounds awfully like Kamina....

......POKEY PEIRCE IS THE LUNAVERSE'S KAMINEIGH!

THIS IS MAI HEADCANON!!!!

>>660699660699

oh, "nothing"...

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/discord.png

Awesome end, there. I am so gonna use Pokey, Pinkie's 'interviews' and the like for the later parts of 'Ill Communication'. And a tiger... interesting.

CALLED IT.

Well, not totally - I expected Trixie was making ZIzanie's life difficult on purpose; but then again, it's much funnier if it wasn't intentional. But I knew that Trixie was going to already know that "Moondancer" wasn't who she said she was. And you've also nicely set up some potential Night Court intrigues...

Speaking of Zizanie - so she's got a few disguises, it seems! Notably, she has a tiger's paw, but also still seems to have skill with magic. Hmm...rakshasa, maybe?

>>661190661190 You have to take a moment and realize what exactly did Zizanie do to Trixie for those five seconds

>>661259661259

Destroyed illusions by turning them into moths, and either actually removed Trixie's illusion by making it a moth; or else simply used an illusion to cover it up, again involving moths, and further at least had Trixie believing it was real.

Moths...moths...tiger paw...illusions...enchantments...bunyip?

...maybe I should be digging through my Monster Manuals for this...

>>661289661289 Hmm maybe you're looking too far

The idea of having Trixie figure out that 'Moondancer' wasn't who she claimed to be due to the fact that Pinkie never threw her a welcoming party is hilarious and genius.

>>661564661564 Thank you

Absolutely fantastic!

Trixie is best horrible pony!

So, why is Zizanie a Draconequus?

Only time will tell, it seems.

>>661987661987 She's not. She said it herself "I am a pony".  

Maybe just a touch?

A satisfactory end that opens up so many possibilities, (ponies tainted by Discords magic hmm).  I wasn't expecting this to be a long one, but it still seemed a bit abruptly short by the end.

The continued montage of Trixie being a terrible boss was wonderful as ever, seriously an entire bonus chapter of just that stuff could probably be awesome.  I did however notice you made reference to the knife trick though, which currently listed placement of my own story would suggest wasn't conceived until after this.  Not a problem though, I only tentatively placed mine after yours because I thought I was going to make use of Trixie having a secretary.  Further writing has increasingly made the additional character extraneous to the needs of my story though, so I was already considering having mine slid back to before yours.

>>662743662743 You don't have to slide the story on my account, Trixie seemed pretty deft with a throwing knife so its possible she knows more than one trick involving a knife. All that we know about the one I mentionned is that its dangerous. It was either that or have Moondancer's mane caught on fire.

Maybe I should have added a report to Princess Luna to transition to the end smoother? Maybe a scene of Prince Blueblood shaking a hoof in rage swearing that 'next time!' it would be different? I honestly felt like adding too much would just weight down the story with filler or I would risk going into boring exposition. I feel like I hit the important points I had in mind and had enough humor.

>>662784662784

It's not strictly on your account.  Like I said, it was a change I was already considering, and only affects the chapter I'm currently writing not the two that are already up.  Unless there are fewer than 3 days between Family Matters and your story this should be a smooth transition.

On a further note, I'd also agree that Trixie is already quite skilled with knife tricks, she basically says as much in Boast Busted and while she is prone to exaggerating her own abilities she doesn't seem the type to actually put another pony's life at any intentional risk.  Rather, it's just as of the spot it came up in Chapter 1 of my story she wasn't yet planning to use any in the show.

I can't help but think that the hot sauce as salad dressing trick was intentional. Trixie did seem to start "playing dumb" towards the end, I think. Great story! Nicely creepy between all the humour.

>>663378663378

I actually know someone who's done that. I think Trixie did it for serious

Well, this has been a fun ride, and I welcome Zizanie as the Lunaverse's first new character! (new in that she doesn't seem to be a divergent version of anypon- err, anybody, from canon) I loved the 'frustrating boss' montage in particular, and the reveal that that was 100% genuine Trixie was just great!

Oh, and I suppose the illusion battle was pretty cool, too.

Hahaha! Great stuff! This is one of a great many reasons why the Lunaverse is best Alt-verse: it's great fun to read about! And Zizane seems like she'll be a difficult enemy in later stories.<Trixie can take her, though! >

This was a great story, Fizzy! For your 'first ever' especially so, you have writing down. I'd like to read more stories by you in the future!

>>668218668218>>668806668806 Thank you!

Well it's not my 'first ever' story, I've written stuff before but it's my first MLP story for sure and I hadn't published anything in a long time.

I do so love Trixie's culinary peculiarities... possibly because I myself cannot resist "improving" recipies when I cook. Never worked with a coffee zealot, or I'd probably pull that stunt just to see the reaction.

Turning out interesting. Even the slice of life stories get more serious in the Lunaverse, it seems.

>>722962722962 Glad you enjoyed it! I know I enjoyed writing it.

I never worked with a coffee zealot either, but I know that some don't even tolerate sugar and milk in coffee!

What I wanna know is who did discord get his freak on with to give this bloodline?

Who indeed?

Wow! You used an unusual character but made me feel like i knew him!

Pokey Pierce`s horn is the horn that will pierce the heavens!.

Poor Moondancer.  (The real one)

Zizanie's real identity is gonna drive me nuts.

Moondancer is dastardly communist. Watch out Trixie.

Yeah, I'm late reading, and finding, this entire universe, oh well, it's a fantastic read.

I loved how you showed off Trixie's unusual pallet, probably has something to do with the fact that I'm just as bad & I get those same looks that she probably does; people don't react well when they see you putting burger toppings on ice cream and other such oddities.  Definitely my favorite character quirk.

Can't wait to see how you wrapped it up.

I was wondering what the quality of the lunaverse stories would be since different authors write the stories but too my pleasant surprise they have all been very entertaining and this is no exception.  Thank you for the fun experience of your story.

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Cloudchaser_dealwithit.png

Pretty convincing, except for the part where the mime laughs. Mimes can't laugh silly.

"...nothing ever happens in Ponyville"

A new villain with unusual abilities and a unique personality? Oh boy! I can't wait for the next chapter!

End Credits

...

Bronies, I am disappoint.  Months, and nopony got around to posting:

Image: http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxi7qvuKmC1r84xgjo1_1280.gif

And I absolutely love just how much of an abrasive prick Trixie is.  Good lord

I maintain that Trixie's weirdass munchies are an amazing gag (sometimes literally).

>>10060391006039 I know, right?

....

No.

Great job so far cant wait to read the rest!!!

Awesome! This story was hilarious and Trixie... Trixie is badass!

  You know, I first read Hard Bargain and Musicians and Dreamers, so I crystalized this image of Trixie being completely inapt as a combatent, both physically and magically.

>>25193962519396 The Great and Powerful Trixie is really ressourceful

I didn't expect the last two chapters to be told from the point of view of Moondancer Zizanie.

Way to make me pity the villain.

Also, I thought Pinkie Pie would eventually take the job and demonstrate supernatural organization skills.

What actually happened is better.

>>10060001006000

Indeed. They just got done saying the opposite in the previous 'episode'.

And... discordian? Hmm. I wonder whether they're going to connect Discordianism to Discord like I did...

I did NOT expect the Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann reference.

What a great story!

It was definitely an enjoyable comedy all the way through: the offers from people who walk through Trixie's doors, to her unintended torment to Moondancer, to just being herself. That's what this story seemed to be all about: just Trixie being Trixie. The references, particularly her singing in the shower, were just hilarious .

This story, of course, notably introduced the Zizanne. She's someone I definitely feel a love/hate relationship toward: a Catwoman-like criminal who's only looking out for numero uno. The curious thing for me, is that while I never want her to succeed in her plans, she's interesting enough that I have a back-and-forth affection for her, which is why I like her. Her Discordian nature for instance makes her someone you almost feel pity toward, and her struggles with herself make her more then just a straight-up villain. It all builds up to a fun antagonist that you want to see more of, unlike the Night Court members or other clear-cut villains that you have nothing but contempt for.

It as a short straight-forward story, all things considered, and laid down the seeds for future works within this universe. With funny jokes and references, and a new good antagonist, it was definitely a solid entry .