(Marked AU for Angel's unique backstory.)
Angel Bunny has everything he wants in life: A warm place to sleep, the freedom to do what he wants when he wants, and an owner that loves him unconditionally and caters to his every whim. In short, life is good, and he had no plans to make a change.
Then one day, a chance encounter during a routine trip to the Ponyville market dredges up some long-forgotten ghosts from Angel's past, and the bunny suddenly found himself smack-dab in the middle of an intergalactic succession dispute, with the very future of the planet hanging on the outcome.
Can Angel face down the demons he had avoided for so long? More importantly, can he do it without losing everything he holds dear?
Thanks to Lance Skyes for pre-reading!
A couple of things. First...
I'm truly sorry for this, but that deserves a Lenny.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Moving on...
>forgotten
I think you meant to say "learned"? Correct me if I'm wrong and I'm just reading this weird.
Once again, and I do apologize for this... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Other than those three little things, two of which I only had to stamp with a Lenny, I happened to like the chapter. Didn't do a good job explaining, but you missed that in such a way that the reader will be intrigued. The bits you did explain, however, namely how Angel felt with Fluttershy, were done rather well. I think this story has potential.
Also, if you're confused on tags, I'll make a few suggestions.
Comedy in some areas, but let me know if this was unintentional. Sounds like an Adventure is in the works, as well. I'm pretty sure an Alternate Universe tag would be appropriate. Also, and forgive me for the mindset A New World, A New Way has given me, it sounds like there's possibly the potential for a Romance between Angel and Fluttershy. (Maybe not, though. Your call.) And to top it all off, it kind of feels like things could get a little Dark later on down the road.
And that's what I think. A very good chapter, only in need of a minor touch-up or two, and possibly the start of something great. Thank you for making me one of your pre-readers, and good luck when this story gets published.
6096101
I've changed the things you mentioned, and I think your Adventure and AU suggestions suit the story well. (The Romance idea is an intriguing one, but I'm no good at shipping stories...)
Thanks again for taking a look at my story!
The comedy started off as intentional, but the more I wrote, the more serious the chapter seemed to get. I'll make another pass through the chapter and see if I can set a serious tone all the way through.
On an unrelated note, I really need to read A New World, A New Way one of these days.
6097290 Indeed you do. The first book already ended, and the second saga is on its way. The only issue is just how many stories there are in the AU. There are so many, it makes my head hurt just thinking about it.
*Psyduck passes me some Tylenol*
Thank you.
But back on topic, it was my pleasure to help you polish this story. Hope it does well.
6096101
No, that's actually correct. "I've forgotten more about X than you'll ever know!" is a colloquialism intended to convey that whoever is saying it is extremely knowledgeable about a particular subject: The idea is that they know so much about it, that they had to forget some of the things they first learned about it to make room for newer information.
A comparable turn of phrase would be along the lines of, "I have more brains in my little finger than you have in your head."
That said, the story still reads wonderfully; this was mainly informational.
6102097 Okay. Thank you for clarifying that.
Yes... continue....
bit.ly/1FvY0R2
Wow! I can't believe I've never read your stuff before! Its amazing!
Why is there no more, sir?
6272125 Thank you! And...
6272137 Have no fear - The next chapter of AAFA is at the top of my priority list!