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We all know the story of how the elements of harmony saved Equestria many times but what if the story was different.
My name is Fox McCloud and this is my story.
Mlp/Star Fox crossover, I own nothing.
The story starts three months before season 1.
Level 3 Anthro.
So I'm trying again and hope that this is better.
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Well so far this has my interest. I will follow for now and see where it goes.
Nice first chapter, right now i would say, " i hope there is another chapter soon.
6167617 I have four other stories I'm writing so I do not know when the next chapter will come.
i guess you meant my pillow right?
At the second half of the chapter it looked like the story is going to be rushed a bit, i hope you don´t plan to make every day that fast, at least not if there is something, where some important things could happen.
I mean some meetings i would like to read about.
KO when's the next chapter this story great so far.
This is a really good story glad I found it when I'm getting into stardom I hope the next chapter is coming soon
Star fox not stardom I hate auto correct
It´s too long, and I fogort what Sunset is doing there.
who is sparkle? is it Twilight? did you gave Twilight two elements?
Sometimes I like it if the special character has something similar strong as the elements, but I actually liked it like this.
6750843 If the chapter is to long then stop reading, always complaining.
6751000 always complaining? Well how should you now about our opinion otherwise, and some even need it to improve. I actually try to be nice with it criticism.
However this time I just had something to drink, and it seems it was enough for me not to notice that I had actually written it wrong. I meant that it was a long time since I had read the last chapter, and don´t remember everything.
I´m actually a bit surised, that it looks like you would take it that seriously, I think I haven´t read that much from you so far.
Great chapter Keep going. I got know what happen next.
6751087 Then you have to wait until next year, sorry.
It cool all good thing come to those who wait.
Now this is getting very interesting
The dreaded cliffhanger...
well now that i have read the chapter after so long i say it was pretty good and am looking forward to what happens next.
I liked how everything plays out in the end and can completely see Fox's reasoning for the eye and eyepatch.....though my question is will someone be able to grant him sight through his left eye via magic? Aside from that, great chapter mate, can't wait to see how AJ and Mac react to what Fox said before heading in
I really want to see Princess Celestia coming to Ponyville for having a discussion with Fox and Sunset Shimmer, there is a lot of things they have to deal with.
now I really want to start a betting thing here in how many 'WTF' moments with fox.
OMG~!
Ok first of I really enjoy this new chapter and it was pretty long Aswell and I love it Aswell AND second THAT ENDING omg I know who it is he meant his finally came! I'm really really really looking forward to seeing the next chapter it's been so long and his finally show up
Yay! So happy to see the new chapter out
I’m looking forward to seeing what is happening next and see what is Celestia up to.. and Looking forward to my OC meeting Pinkie Pie/Pinkie Pie Finding And Meeting my OC
Great chapter as always.
This was a little hard to read due to many grammar errors but it was still a good chapter
Great chapter I really really enjoyed it so much! And glad to see my OC Arctic Ace make his appearance again I’m looking forward to seeing the next chapter
oh boy... this is not looking good for fox..he should not have pushed himself.. and twilight is gonna get in trouble for it too.. if he is now crippled cause of her.. I do not wish to think about that..
Not bad overall, nice to see Coal getting a bit more involved, though hoping he'll get a chance to show off his strength somewhere down the line.
Also not to sound critical but you might need an editor as there are a fair number of errors in each of these chapters. Again not trying to be a jerk, just pointing that out.
Rip fox.
8695036
Don’t worry, I will show of Coal strength in the future, I know that I need a editor but last time I tried to find it didn’t go so well. So, I’m doing it my was. But thanks.
8695106
Rip Fox? Really? REALLY?
8695126
What he's hurt.
8695129
But he’s not DEAD.
8696098
I Know.
8695126
Well if you ever need an editor I'm available to do it for you. I've actually got a bit of experience. My info is on my profile page if you are interested.
'bout time I started reading this. Let's see how this goes.
...oh, and why is it that biped canines never get mistaken for Diamond Dogs in these stories?
8824305
What?
8825025
Sorry. Just an observation. Be it Fox, Goofy, or Huckleberry Hound, authors around here seem to play up how the ponies have never seen anything like the crossover protagonist, completely forgetting that Diamond Dogs are a thing that exist. Of course, given that the show only used them once, way back in Season 1, with it being Season 8 now, I'm not sure I can blame them anymore.
Ol' Bacon Mane is here? Wow, this story is AU even without the crossover.
8825772
What the hell do you mean? Sorry about ‘hell’ word.
8825891
This is Starcat5 comment.
1) Swearing is fine.
2) I didn't mean it as a negative. Just an observation. Having Sunset Shimmer in Ponyville, rather than the EqG Mirrorverse, implies that events of this story will diverge from canon with or without Fox's influence.
*golf clap* a "Perfect Pear" reference, and hinting at Pony Midnight Sparkle happening before the end of Season 3. Good show, sir. Good show.
I guess someone wasn't a fan of the Griffinstone episode. Also, my right eye is twitching in sympathy.
Seriously, Fox. You are friends with the local tailor. A nice blue patch with the Starfox logo would distance yourself quite nicely from Wolf's black patch/cybernetic eye.
8850374
What do you mean? I don’t get it.
8850425
Left eye, not the right one.
Looks like someone isn't a fan of Trixie's "Draco in Leather Pants" status. Me? Even back then, I noticed that, as hecklers, Rarity AJ and Dashie were the ones in the wrong. ...even if Trixie did believe her own hype a little too much.