If humans had a special mark that appeared on any part of their body proclaiming their special talent, Horace's would have been on his tongue. If there was anything he was good at, it was talking himself in and out of situations but with his current (and possibly permanent) stay in Equestria, he's been fighting a battle with the local language barrier.
Turning mute is looking really nice right about now.
AN/ I wrote this to get myself out a writer's block. I just thought you should know that.
Chapters (2)
If Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair,
but had fir to make him furry;
would Fuzzy be furry or fuzzy?
Wouldn't Wuzzy still be fuzzy?
Fuzzy Wuzzy was always Fuzzy,
even if he wasn't fuzzy.
Whether or not had hair or fir,
Wuzzy would be called 'Fuzzy
It could have been worse. It could have said: "Have sex with me," which would have been the more literal translation.
This is fucking genius! I hope you don't plan to write this when you only have writers block! Do you plan updating this often? Also, can he understand their language but just doesn't have the vocal range to pronounce it himself?
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That sounds like a great idea! But I haven't beaten my writer's block yet so you don't have to worry wheither or not I'll update. I will in the next coming hours or days.
All questions will be answered in the second chapter but yeah, he gets the gist of what they are saying in most situations.
In the words of a man far wiser than myself: "You can't think yourself out of a writing block; you have to write yourself out of a thinking block."
Also, I like this, and even if it was just written to get you out of your block, I'm sure a lot of people would love if you continued it.
hilarious we should see more fanfics like this.
That poor guy. I get the feeling the that the translator was made by Discord.
It's probably bad that I clicked on this thinking it was some care bears crossover; Prof. Coldheart often refereed to the Care Bears as ''Fuzzy-Wuzzies' or the like. Regardless what reasoning brought me here, this is genius and I love it. Its not often I read HIE stories, and this is certainly one of the few that I'm going to be keeping track of.
So if I'm reading this right this is a HIE where the ponies are larger than the average human and humans (or at least this guy) just so happen to be adorable in the eyes of said ponies?
If that is the case then this is going to be original and hilarious
Now THIS is an inversion and a half! It's the ponies who think the human is unbelievably adorable. I love it!
The translator... It's so close, yet just too far off the mark...
If Horace wants to be respected then he's just gonna have to stick it up 'em. Them fuzzy-wuzzies don't like it up 'em, oh no they don't sir!
I will be surprised if someone actually gets the reference.
Oh boy, a translator that enforces harmony chats. I can imagine that being annoying for discord!
5882890 thank you corporal Jones. Not sure the ponies want their meat ration though.
"My translator is broken."
"I don't speak words good."
"Goddammit."
"Gosh darn."
This is kind of heart breaking...
So...has he even tried to work around it? Maybe draw pictures. Or point at the translator and shake his head. Anything? Try and give some clue that the translator isn't working other than saying it?
They know he's speaking through a translator, right?
Why can't he draw pics or write?
5889873
How so?
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5890467
My very long response to both of your questions was lost when I accidentally refreshed the wrong page. I guess it comes with the territory with having too many tabs open. But I'm going to take it as a sign to sum it all up. There are two reasons why he doesn't bother with it. (But this will come up in the third chapter.)
One: The translator has its own agenda and works fine on his end (translating sounds into words, words into words that he can understand coming from an english-speaking background and so on). But on their end, it only does it vocally. Not going into the specifics of the great divide that comes in with being a equine species, the translator has more to work with on their side than to his. Among themselves, the ponies have a hard time learning symbols between the tribes because of how the other writes. But when in doubt, they can always talk to each other.
Horace has lucked out for now but he's been sabotaging himself more than he thinks.
Two: Have you ever watched a video where a cat opens a door by jumping on the door handle? A dog howling 'I love you'? A hamster that can sneak into a bowl of cheese curls with the Mission Impossible theme song play? Imagine those animals could talk but for the longest time, they sounded like the dog I mentioned? You respond to them as you always do, pet and call them cute. The pet might make more sounds at you but the translator says, "Pet me! I need love and affection."
Sigh, I should just make a blog post. BRB.
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It's nothing to do with disappointment or anything. Anon's situation just gives me feels. If that wasn't your intent, it might just be for personal reasons.
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I'm happy that you feel feels. Let me know that I'm heading in the right direction!
I'm sorta dissapointed you didn't work out something similar to this into the story...
Translator: "I WUV YOU!!!"
5889245 honestly, imagine if you had that and tried to talk to other humans.
all trapped, intellectually, only able to signal for attention, not able to transmit ideas, and if you try to communicate ideas, the translator gets it wrong, it'd be like your every other sentence is replaced by something a 3-year old would say.
jeezus christ, how horrifying
A utterly hillarious fic so far, well done!
This story is utter nonsense, but I can't stop laughing.
I'm so worked up right now. I don't know why I got so angry reading this nor at whom I should direct that anger, the ponies who put him in that situation, or him for his lack of effort/drive to get out of it. I can't help but to keep imagining myself in his situation, not being able to express myself properly nor the fact of that inability...
That being said, I really liked reading this short story and it's ability to inflict such a strong emotional response in me. That attests to something.