Not long after Ted returned to the ship, or rather his consciousness returned to the ship, Lady Thrisha returned from below deck followed by a small group of griffons. To Ted's disappointment, only about fourteen of the refugees were willing to accept the offer of shelter.
"Most were willing to accept until I mentioned that you had changelings at the sanctuary." Thrisha told him. "The scars are still too fresh, and for many the invasion was their first sight of the species. As you may guess, it did not leave us unscarred."
The alicorn nodded, turning to address the gathered crowd with a stoic gaze. "I understand Lady Thrisha has explained my offer, but I wish to repeat it. I am offering you shelter for as long as you wish to stay. Many of our number are refugees like yourselves, driven from their homes by their conscience or the actions of others. While I welcome you, I ask that you respect the fact that all species are welcomed in the Temple of the Shadows. As such, we have accepted several changelings into our number, as well as the remnants of a local gnoll pack. Once we arrive at the Temple, please treat all beings as sapients unless told otherwise. You are allowed to defend yourselves of course, but I will ask you to leave if you attempt to provoke any of the residents. If you don't leave after that, I'll see to the matter personally. As has been said my home is a sanctuary, and I will not have others causing problems where none existed before."
Ted's expression softened after he'd given the rules. "That being said, you will be treated kindly and fairly by my people, including being given access to any medical assistance we can give that you may require. Any who wish to leave after the storms pass will be given directions to the nearest settlement, less than a days flight from the Temple, two and a half days by land. For those who find themselves comfortable, speak to either myself, or one of my quartermasters and advisers and we will see about setting you up with a more permanent residence. Once we reach the Temple, any resident will be able to give you the names to search out."
Moments later the refugees were on the beach, any possessions they were not able to carry with them at the moment stashed in the remnants of the old inn, to be retrieved once all the wounded were safely transported to the Temple if time allowed. Ted found himself grasping two litters holding injured griffons in his telekinetic grip, levitating them along as he flew back home. It was odd thinking of the Temple of the Shadows as such, but as of now, it was the only place the alicorn had access to that came close to warranting such a title. As he took off into the atmosphere, powerful beats of his wings easily driving him to the head of the flock, he turned and watched as the Golden Talon raised anchor and headed north, hoping to beat the worst of the storm in a mad dash to Port Zarris. Though he was irritated at the captain, he wouldn't wish ill on him, and as he escorted those who accepted his offer off the ship, he'd wished the captain luck while telling him to seek out Sahkest, the port's dragon quartermaster for supplies. Taking one more look around, he watched the flagging refugees, before making his way to one towards the back. It looked like the young tom who'd been at the door back on the ship, and the dark alicorn noticed one of his wings was flapping at a slower rate than the other. Still doing his best to keep his grip steady on the two litters, he positioned himself under the griffon, motioning for him to land on Ted's back. His passenger secured, he once again pushed forward with all haste. The storm was just starting to impact the coast. Ted could smell the rain even as they moved away from the storm front. Time was short.
<-(0)->
The flock touched down in the Temple courtyard on a small area that had been specially prepared and marked for landings. As soon as the refugees had landed, Gleam and several other ponies began escorting the griffons to the barracks and shed. Ted himself left the litters in the barracks, seeing as the injured would need better protection from the storm.
"How went the preparations, Gleam?" The alicorn asked. Even now he could here the faint rumble of thunder in the distance, and he could see the encroaching storm clouds over the trees.
"Grift and the drones managed to reapply sealants to both the temple and most of the buildings we've been working on. It's the true test of the construction now, unfortunately it's going to be done with strangers in the buildings." The unicorn explained, not looking up from her papers. "I don't like the idea, but if things go wrong we can move them inside. Worst case scenario, we've expanded the underground tunnels a bit for extra storage and Pandinus' drones have sealed them from rain drainage. We can move people down there if it gets bad."
Ted smiled at the mare. "Thank you Gleam. As always, you're a life saver. I'm going to need to speak with Lady Thrisha later on, so I'll be using the library for that unless it's being used for something else. If any of the griffons give you trouble let me know."
Walking away from the settling refugees, he was about to enter the Temple when he came across a familiar form. Blur was sitting near the doorway, watching for an opportunity to welcome the newcomers, but seemed unsure as to how to approach them. Sitting on the recovering vegetation, he was given his first clear view of the pegasus without distractions. Her mane, finally recovering from the ragged torn thing most of the ponies were working with when he first arrived, was returning to a light sky-blue color, an obvious improvement from the almost white pallor many manes had taken as starvation set in.
Approaching the Pegasus with a grin, Ted snuck up behind her and wrapped Blur in a hug, lifting the surprised mare off the ground. Nuzzling the squeaking and squirming pony, Ted started laughing at her attempts to escape his grip. "Oh come on, Blur, I haven't had the chance to speak with you in so long!"
"F-Father! What are you doing!" The mare squeaked, futilely attempting to free herself from the alicorn's forelegs.
"Just saying hello to my favorite little nut-ball." He said while laughing. "How are you feeling lately, Blur? I see you finally dropped that old robe, that's good. Those things are just silly. Half of them are ratty and torn anyway."
Setting the confused and embarrassed Pegasus down, he finally saw her cutie mark. A red heart behind a small cabin.
'Loving home, oh god, no wonder she was so lost before.' The alicorn thought sadly.
Luna had explained to him what happened to ponies who found themselves distanced from what they loved. Some ponies became depressed, lethargic, and unable to function properly. Others moved on, though they would find no real joy in life till they found a way to continue pursuing their talent. Blur had managed to move on, pushing on till she found her way to another loving home. When she thought she found it, it didn't matter to her that she was accepting the role of a daughter of what many saw as a monster while she herself was an adult mare. A family was what she needed, and she dove in with zeal.
A sly grin played across the large stallions muzzle. "Has my daughter found a suitable stallion yet?" He asked, an eyebrow raising suggestively. The response was almost immediate.
"Wha- I don't, Father, I ca-" The mare sputtered and floundered a moment, before she stopped, a single word he said drawing the entirety of her attention. The yellow pegasus' eyes widened in shock.
"D-daughter?"
"Well, you've been calling me father for a long while now, so I don't see why I can't join in on it. Besides," he said, giving the mare a nuzzle on the cheek, "a father is allowed to tease his children much more than a ruler can tease his subjects."
As he stood there, a strange feeling overtook Ted. Everything else just stopped being important for a moment. The world faded out, and all he found to be important was the mare before him, a young lady in need of a father's love. Of reassurance, of care, of all the things she'd been missing for star's knew how long.
"I don't care who you were, my child,
It doesn't matter from whence you hail.
All I ask for is your love,
And I'll be the wind behind your sail."
The smile on the alicorn's muzzle softened, becoming much more loving as he scooped the mare up again, this time holding her up to his height, his forelegs allowing her to sit at his eye level.
"You've lost so much on the journey,
And asked for nothing more than this.
What monster would I become, my daughter,
If such a simple request, I dismissed."
Blur sniffled, her eyes becoming watery at her Father's words. Soon she too was caught up in the moment, and spoke.
"I've longed for just so long,
Hoping to find my Home.
I wandered from Canterlot mountains, Father,
To the Crystal Empire's shimmering dome."
"After so long on the road,
I think I've found just the thing.
A family of strangers brought together
Under the loving guidance of your wings."
The alicorn kissed her lovingly on the head before sitting her back down, oblivious to the growing crowd that stared at the spectacle occurring before them.
"A family you hoped for, my child.
A family you've long pursued.
Here in this Temple we've claimed,
I offer a place in mine, to you."
Ted lifted a wing, wiping away the last of the pegasus' tears before speaking to her once more.
"If ever you need to speak with me, Blur, do not hesitate to ask. I will listen to the fears and worries of all who reside within my home."
With that the alicorn gave one last nuzzle to the yellow Pegasus before walking down the halls to the infirmary. Though he wasn't looking forward to this talk with the changeling queen, he moved with an assured purpose. The followers called him Father, it was only right that he reciprocate.
Gleam could only stare at the scene that had unfolded before her eyes. Her mouth moved, but no words were formed. Eventually she shook her head, attempting to free herself from the aftereffects of the event, only to find the griffon noble by her side, tears in her eyes.
Reaching a talon up to her face, the older griffon wiped a few stray tears away before turning to Gleam. "I was hoping to speak with him regarding his plans for this place. I- I think I can hold off on that for a little while. You understand just what it was we have witnessed, do you not, Miss Gleam?"
Gleam nodded, not trusting her voice yet. The old griffon sighed wistfully.
"I'm not certain how I feel about it." She said with a light giggle. "On the one claw, I'm honored to have witnessed such an event. On the other, I worry that my bucket list is growing short." Turning to the unicorn mare with a smile, Thrisha posed a question.
"Tell me, Miss Gleam. How should one feel when they've witnessed most of the things they'd hoped to witness before they passed?"
The mare smiled, swallowing hard to make sure her mouth was still working.
"I, I suppose you start making a new list, Lady Thrisha."
<-(0)->
Ted stepped into the infirmary, immediately spotting his targets. Pandinus was still laying on a cot, though the holes in her legs were slowly closing up once more. Beside her sat Grift, the changeling looking a bit heavy despite the grueling work schedule Gleam and Pandinus put him through. Finally, keeping a respectable distance between herself and others, Mirage nervously paced between several cots. Her proximity to the queen and other drone did not seem to be doing her any favors. The moment he entered the room, however, all eyes were on him. It took a moment for the alicorn to remember that they could taste his emotions, so his current positive attitude was likely a beacon to their senses.
"Hello, thank you for being here. The foals are with Miss Goodhooves at the moment I assume?" He asked the matron changeling. At Mirage's nod, he continued. "I asked you to be here for several reasons. First of all, as Mirage can probably already guess we have several refugees that will be using the barracks and storage building for shelter until the storm passes. They're jumpy, especially around changelings, so I ask that you all keep clear of them as much as you can. They won't be coming into the main temple, and the rain should keep the children inside anyway. That leaves you and Grift, Din. I know your feeling better, so I don't think it will be long before your back to causing me problems, right?" At the queens grin, Ted chuckled. "That's what I figured. The second thing I want to warn you of is the reason I'm asking you to stay clear of the griffons. They were driven from their home by a large swarm of changelings."
"That's not possible." Grift said. "The largest hive I'm aware of is right here, and there's no way that many changelings could have gathered together without being noticed."
"They were noticed Grift, the problem here is that they're under the control of another nation. Specifically, Equestria. The Mad Queen's army seems to be using them as shock troops, as Lady Thrisha told me she heard from other survivors that the Equestrian Military arrived shortly after the swarm, taking any survivors they could find prisoner and claiming the towns for their ruler. Normally, upon hearing the state of the swarm, I would have dismissed them as a threat, as they sounded to be just barely alive. In fact, what I saw of them in the dream of a griffon earlier had their bodies failing them even as they struck the village. However, this is not the case."
"They can replenish their troops." Pandinus interrupted. "I can lay only seven to ten eggs every week or so, but if a queen were desperate, she could modify herself in a few molts to lay much faster. If she gave up moving entirely, she could pump out possibly one hundred drones a week, maybe more."
Ted nodded, grateful for the information. "Now multiply that reproductive capacity by an unknown number of queens the Mad queen's gotten a hold of, combined with the fast maturation rate of the non-sapient drones, and she could easily field large groups of these mindless things with no danger to her own soldiers or equipment." The alicorn finished.
Grift and Mirage were silent, the numbers being thrown around terrifying them almost as much as the idea of seeing so many mad, mindless beings of their own kind. Pandinus, however, chewed her lip in concentration.
"One thing about this bothers me though. For such a large swarm of mere drones, the queens would need to keep a constant hold on the swarm to prevent them from biting their masters hoof. However, with such constant losses, the minds of the queens would be shattered within moments of the attack beginning. So what is it that's keeping the drones in check? It can't be a link."
"My first guess would be an array of some kind, enforcing basic rules like 'listen to pony A', and 'don't attack ponies wearing B'. The only reason I say this is because everything else the Mad Queen has done has been through arrays, and she's proven herself to be extremely skilled in their use. Out of left field guess? An artificial queen of some sort, something loyal only to the queen that has the computational capacity to deal with several thousand changelings. Being artificial, the mental trauma queens feel may not do anything to it."
"An artificial queen? You mean like some type of golem controlling a hive?!?" The queen screeched, her eyes blazing with indignant fury. "That, that whorse would dare trivialize the Link in such a way? I'll clone that nag just to feed her her own still-beating heart!"
"Pandinus, calm yourself! This is only speculation, we have no way of knowing how it works without actually seeing the control method for ourselves." Ted said to her. "That is all you two need to hear." He said, turning to the two drones. "I'd like to speak with Queen Pandinus alone now."
Mirage rolled her eyes before hopping off a cot she'd claimed during the meeting, while Grift hesitated, looking to his queen for guidance. The queen bobbed her head to the door, prompting the shape shifter to head to the exit.
"Din, are you up to this right now?" The alicorn asked, his face a stone mask.
"I'm no hatchling, and it was my body that was damaged, not my mind." At the stallion's raised eyebrow, the queen huffed at him. "Yes I'm ready, speak your peace. The sooner I learn this information, the sooner I can find a way to drag you to my nest willingly. Or you can drag me to yours, it matters little to me."
The alicorn shook his head at the queen's antics, a smile breaking out on his face. "You know, most individuals don't openly state their intentions to drag a potential partner back to their bed."
"Well, I'm not most 'people', am I?" Din responded callously.
"Nope, you're something else alight. When I figure out what that something is, I'll let you know." Letting out a slight chuckle, Ted took a seat on the floor in front of the queen.
"Din, I know you're looking for two things from me, and I've asked for things from you in return. Do you remember what my requests were?" At Pandinus' nod he continued. "I need someone who can be there for me, Din. Not just because of what I offer, but because you want to stay here. You've already said you've noticed my preference for monogamy, but the fact is that my people are also supposed to be life-mates. Once you get what you want, what will you do with it? Will you take what you believe is yours and leave once the Mad Queen is dealt with? If that's your plan, I ask you to give this up."
Pandinus snorted at him. "After I get what I want? What, do you think I can store the results of a single mating like some biological memory crystal? Queens can use the seed of stallions so much more efficiently than most species, but I still need a source, and it does decay over time." She gave him a grin, running her forked tongue over her fangs seductively. "Not that I mind needing to harvest more over the years. As to the love you would give me? I, I'm not certain, actually." She said, gaining a far-away look in her eyes. "This hive already has something no other hive has had before; a surplus of emotion. There is no fear of our gatherers being captured or killed, no worries of the source going bad. Mother never mentioned a time in our history when the changelings were content, and I've never seen a heavy changeling before. I don't need your love so much as, I want to know what it's like. I'd be the first changeling queen of my hive, possibly in history to have a willing mate that offered his love without deception on my part. I did as you asked, you know. I couldn't go out there, so I had the drones watching for me. Watching the ponies that radiated love to each other. It was strange. Normally I feel anger, sometimes outright rage at the thought of that much love being wasted on creatures that didn't need it, but...but knowing it's possible? That someday I could have such a thing for my own?" The queen was shaking slightly, though if it was in anticipation or fear of loss, Ted didn't know. "I have so much right now, Simmer. I have a hive of my own, I have safety, more than my mother ever dreamed of, I have a stallion that looks at me with something other than disgust...I know it's selfish but I want more. I want love, real love that's directed at me! The desire to hold a mare, to feel her warmth, to see her smile, to press your lips against hers; I live off of such things, but it's never for me, it's never me the desires are for!"
"Can you even begin to understand that?" The changeling asked with desperation in her eyes. "The positive emotions we live on was always an empty taunt, something we could never have for ourselves, and love always tasted the sweetest even though I knew it was false. The emotions here are so powerful we gorge ourselves and do no harm to our hosts, because the ponies share it with us. It's so wonderful, so delicious, so full. I, I don't even know how to describe it to you." She finished, lowering her muzzle to the cot.
"Like taking a bite of the finest pastry after years of living on crumbs?" The alicorn asked, nuzzling the changeling gently. "Like being offered the most beautiful, softest robes after spending your life wearing rags? Like being healed of injuries you've carried with you all your life?" He kissed her softly on her lips, his smile so full of love she felt her vision begin to tint slightly. "Like finding a family after you'd found yourself alone in the world? This last one I know especially well, Din. It's because of you, as well as the alicorn sisters, that I've learned to accept my followers as a family in and of itself. I still want to see my biological family, or at least my mental-biological one, or whatever you'd call them, but I'll make sure this family is safe and well taken care of."
Glancing to a magically run clock above Trauma's empty desk, the alicorn turned back to the queen with a slight bow. "Queen Pandinus, would you do me the honor of joining me for dinner?"
To be fair, I skipped it, its a habit I've had ever since reading the hobbit and lord of the rings. I just don't read songs in prose form, ever. Dunno why.
Meanwhile, In
the Decepticon baseCanterlot.stream1.gifsoup.com/view/1016840/autobot-to-decepticon-o.gif
I said it again: we need another chapter from the Mad Queen's perspective ; has she identified the threat Cimmerian represent?
I though the song was very nice.
I really liked the song, I sang it in my head. Also, I now ship Cimmerinus.
That chapter title as well, we really see eye to eye. No, wai-! Enough with the spoon already, geez...
I'm not entirely sure why Cimmerian having a heart song was such a big thing but it was really sweet. I enjoyed this chapter greatly.
Also, a small reminder to the author as this mistake was made:
Your: Possessive adjective. Who does ____ belong to? with ___ being the noun following it.
You're: A contraction of 'You are'. As such, this should only be used in places where you could type instead 'you are'.
I read that less as a song and more as spoken poetry. I feel it works quite well like that.
The song. I loved it. It was touching, and had it's own melody that i felt, a cadence a tempo... i can not put into words, obviously, but... it was there. You most certainly captured the magic of the moment in that song.
AS for the rest of the Chapter, I loved it, Especially the heart to heart of Pan and Cim. Also, the chapter title was funny ,and gave me mental images... as I'm sure was your intent.
6263163 My guess is that, under the Mad Queen, there hasn't been enough harmony OR happiness for heartsongs to manifest. That, and seeing an Alicorn have such a nurturing heartsong after such a long time with the only Alicorn being an insane tyrant made it doubly powerful to them.
I still can't really comprehend what the attraction is supposed to be, on the main character's side. It's not even about what she is, it's the fact that this chapter featured the first real scene where they actually talk to each, in any meaningful kind of sense. Connecting, getting to know each other, this kind of thing is what you build the affection necessary for a relationship on in the first place. It shouldn't come after the relationship is already decided on as being a "thing." What could he possibly be loving her for? There is nothing between them, no chemistry or commonality, because they don't actually know anything about each other.
It's not that he doesn't have that kind of personal connection with other characters, either. Blur, I could see. Mirage, I could see. But here? Nothing is drawing them together in any visible way, except for, as I've said before, Queen Buggysnatch's status as the designated love interest and her fixation on using him as a sperm bank. I can't fault the rest of the story, except in terms of my personal preference, but the romance element of it is something I think is genuinely badly done. The entire thing just feels incredibly shallow and forced. Nothing about it gives the impression of actually having organically grown from the interactions of the characters with each other. There weren't any for it to have grown from.
The lyrics of the song were nice, but I couldn't figure out where it was supposed to be coming from? Wad it Blur? Cimerion? Choir of ponies not involved? The rocks? It actually kinda bugged me that it was sorceress.
That aside, I'm waiting with anticipation for the reveal of what was actually happening in that scene.
6263125 I think mad queen would come down on him like da bomb if shrink knew he existed. At the moment though, I think he's Muhammad too small a fish to get her attention. Give him a year though, and I think he'll have her.
6263163 Well it has been a long time since anyone has even dreamed. Maybe heart songs faded away and were thought impossible too. That could have been the first one in almost 40 years ie longer than most of the ponies and griffons in the temple have been alive.
So wait? Cimm is only mentally a male?
The first verse of that song was so powerful. I'm so saving it somewhere and writing it down. It's 8 am and I shouldn't be crying like this.
6263119 I read them, but I don't really take them in. Without a tune to go with the lyrics, it's just more words to me..
6263213
No, he means his "biological family" isn't actually biologically related to his current body.
The song was a pretty good poem.
The heartsong, or heart poetry (which is how I interpreted it anyway) was deep and felt meaningful. Overall, a good chapter.
6263184 Personally, I don't think Ted is in love; it's more that he is fond of Pandinus, in spite of her flaws, and is giving the whole relationship thing a chance. Whether or not it'll work out remains to be seen.
That being said, I do agree with you that the romance could use some work. I think there should have been more personal interaction between the two and the fact that there wasn't makes it feel like something is missing.
6263255 So what is Ted's gender and sex? I'm quite certain the alicorn body Ted possesses is of the female sex, and that Ted identifies as a male. Nevertheless, the statement "Ted, is female" has confused me.
6263278
Going by how they actually behave around each other, I'm not really seeing it either. I can't quite shake the feeling that it's what the story wants us to think is there, though. Without it, the whole thing makes even less sense to me. Giving a relationship a "chance" on the basis of a shrug and a "might as well" is just not how real people behave, unless they're really just that superficial and apathetic about it.
6263301
You'd be wrong about that. Part of the premise of the story is that it's not one of those gender-swap things. He's expressly male in both senses.
Excellent Chapter. Though what excatly was the bucket list item? Just seeing an Alicorn sing?
I kind of mentally turned it Gaelic. The song that is. A slow but steady beat, like most old Celtic and Gaelic music, with the song almost spoken with the off set beat of a drum as flutes slowly play a simple five note repeat as some small magic pervades through the air and creates images from both of them without their conscious input as to the images... Oh crap. It has begun. I have started to become actually passionate about this story. The romance could be better, but it requires time to truly become a deeply caring relationship.
6263314 I dunno. You use to have arranged marriages which I could see as giving someone a chance. They often grew to love eachother. But what I see him more then likely doing is to see if he can love her becuase she is well, not human. Familial love or trying to protect others is probably much easier to come to feel even for someone not like you, where romantic love could be harder.
6263301
Reyken is saying the answer to Ted's question is female. Not that Ted is female. It has also been stated that Ted is male and is referred to as Father. Remember that ponies don't wear clothes and can probably see the junk in the trunk so to speak.
6263301 I remember that his body is male. I interpreted Reykan's note as:
Ted, the answer is [that Pandinus is] female.
Or more detailed:
Based on this part
The answer to Ted implicit question here is: Pandinus is female.
6263347
Very, very rarely, actually. Enough so that there are actually a few history books that make mention of royal couples that actually seemed to care for each other, it was that exceptional to see.
Still, kind of an entirely different situation that can't really be compared.
6263314 Fair points. It's still a better love story than Twilight.
More seriously, though, thinking it over I have to admit that the whole thing would have been much more realistic if Ted and Pandinus had grown to be actual friends first, instead of... whatever they were. More than just allies, but I'd wouldn't really have called them friends.
Ultimately, it's not SoD-breaking for me, so I can live with it.
6263131
Um... What development do you mean? He's nervous about the song, then makes a lite joke. What's this shocking development you see that we don't?
I loved the song. I get the feeling that ponies haven't seen a harmonic song in a very long time.
Every, single time i read about Ted/Din, i keep getting visions of tiny, nightmare/changeling foals, floating over your bed in the form of a black cloud and staring at you with slitted eyes. Gaaaah creeeepypasta.
6263184 There was some mention that Ted was at least physically attracted to Din already. The main reason why he didn't consider wanting to have a relationship was because he wanted return to Earth, which was shown to be unattainable. He had a paradigm shift later overall in regards with his followers, so him reversing his view on getting on with Din is believable. It might be still a bit fast, but both have stated what they want in a relationship - conditions they agreed on. So why not try?
6263379
In fact, it might be more fair to say that there actually isn't a definition for what a god is at all, because none of them are really based in a unique, distinguishing feature about them that a non-god couldn't conceivably also have - and often does, even just within the religion they originate from.
6263449
It's about as romantic as a business deal, but if that were what it was supposed to look like, I wouldn't see a problem with it. The problem is that it clearly isn't supposed to look like that, but the writing doesn't support what it wants to portray instead, either.
6263301 Author's note from first chapter:
The song was good, I liked it a lot actually.
In response to the second half of your note, all I can say is... WTF!!!!
Eh, have a
img10.deviantart.net/71fc/i/2013/015/e/d/why_can__t_i_hold_all_these_feelings__by_ignaciodibujo-d5rhd06.jpg
I, too, find the "romance" incredibly awkward. They need a lot more interaction and need to find themselves a lot more comfortable with each other and get to know each other a lot better before "romance" is even conceivable. I've met people I felt immediately comfortable with and could talk to about anything, and I could see that maybe working its way up to that kind of love, but Ted and Pan don't have that. Everything up to now has been pretty creepy and problematic, and they have a long way to go before they can even really think about that kind of relationship.
I'd suggest going more slowly, revamping this chapter to Ted pressing for friendship first, and them getting to know and (more importantly) understand each other. Then they'll see where life takes them. Pan is still just in it for the food (gourmet though it may be). She needs to be in it for Ted's well-being -- not for him as food, or as the father of her brood, but for him. She needs to care for him as him, more than anything else. And Ted needs to see her as more than the child she currently is, even if she is physically an adult. She needs to mature and understand what it is to feel warmth and empathy for another. She currently doesn't, and what she is now is NOT good relationship material.
Also, I'd put a [1] by Ted's question, as well as by the footnote, because I, too, thought you'd reneged on Ted being male until I saw the comments.
as a poem, the lyrics were very sweet, but i cant make a tune to save my life, so sorry about that. also, i hope we can find out why the song was so important later. (besides it being so adorable.)
6263451
Well, I find some business deals quite attractive.
Seriously though, I think the problem here is that it seems like the author wants to show love, but doesn't really know what it's like. (I believe they stated their lack of knowledge on the matter before.)
If Panda was really in love with Teddy, she would be a lot more open about things on her mind, and not just things that were important. I could see her happily telling stories about her old hive and communicating quickly with ted about what she thinks about or needs to do with their followers. In turn, ted should feel safest discussing with her that the reason for his depression was killing the gnolls, that he had trouble with flying, missed his homeland as well, etc. Right now, ted seems distant from her, like he had been trying to kill the relationship before it started but gave up, and she seems like she's developing something closer to Stockholm syndrome than love.
6263357 Thanks, I just realize how stupid I was being. The author was addressing Ted by telling him that the answer was "female," and it had nothing to do with Ted's gender. Wow, I feel stupid...
Naive young queen... Wasted indeed!
She has never seen a loveless marriage, where the flame has gone out or never existed. The couples she has remotely seen do not need to actually eat the love to need it, to absorb and use it to become more than they are.
That kind of loveless travesty of a paring is what she may need to see to grasp what a LOVING marriage is, what her mind is fumbling to understand that she WANTS to have with Ted.
6263523
Exactly, my good friend!
Time could flow with a 1:1 ratio; it could flow such that every two earth years is one equestrian year (2:1), and onwards to infinity (infinity:1); or it could pass such that two equestrian years equal one earth year (1:2), and on into infinity (1:infinity).
Thus we have the base formula encompassing all possibilities:
Infinity:1 + 1:1 / 1:infinity
Simplified as Infinity + 1 over infinity.
6263499
That's pretty much exactly the things I'm missing from this, too. Frankly, it doesn't even really seem to me like they actually care about each other in any real way at all. Not going by how they actually treat each other. The queen is an outspokenly self-centered brat and the main character has demonstrated, at best, that same impersonal and affected-feeling "fatherly" concern for her that he has for all the rest of his followers, too. Neither behave like people genuinely interested in each other.
6263582
Still wouldn't want to sleep with them, though.
How dare you! You unwashed, brute of a troglodyte! You gunked up my emotion filters! It'll take me hours of cleaning to get that out, you know!
Honestly. People these days.
(I think it is very powerful and works very well as a definitive moment where he decides that this is his home, and these his family.)
I disagree. Her differences include much, much more than just gender.
She seems to have been raised in a loveless environment. She has to give birth every week to offspring that might be more demanding if she can't find a mate. (I think this is another thing that couldn't evolve or at least wouldn't last long by the way. Humans raised in stressful environments tend not to cooperate well, so hundreds of beings with human-like intelligence, an intelligence that needs love early in life to properly develop, would likely cause chaos, and would never be as well developed as the other changelings in your group.) And she has been taught to prey on sentient beings. (Think: bred to be a psychopath.)
The song was fine though. Could've included more mentions of weird magic causing it though, because people don't usually break out in song like that on earth, especially not if they've been acting like Ted. Only hyper enthusiastic people with personalities like Pinkie or Rainbow might actually break out in song randomly like that. It seemed kind of weird without external influences described.
Give us a little tune to go along with it and it'll be almost perfect. Give us a touching, soft song -- maybe with piano -- and it'll be awesome
As the song is, we have to think up our own music to go with the lyrics.
I liked the song. I sure as fuck wouldn't be able to do something like that.
Now, I really want to know just what is was mr griffon was talking about. What was so special about it. Was it more than just a alicorn singing? Was it an alicorn claiming his subjects as his most valued treasures, like pieces of his soul outside of his body? Wasn't it more?
Or did I miss something? If that is the case I blame my own temporary retardation.
I hope that you're planning a second half of this chapter because "the talk" doesn't really seem to match up with the events that made it a necessity. Ted briefly touches on the heart of the issue when he mentions the idea of humans mating for life, and then asking what Pandinus' plan is should she get what she wants. However, he never got an actual answer from her, and he never pressed the real issue.
He wants someone who will care for him, not someone who's just after what he can get them. Pandinus has been taught to go after what she can get and to not bother reciprocating. That's what really needs to be said: Pandinus needs to give her love in the way that ponies understand it (in word, deed, and thought) - a steady back and forth exchange - not in the way changelings understand it. Even if she can't fully do it like a pony - she is a different species, after all - as long as she can get close then she'll do fine. The worry is that she can't even get close so Ted needs her answer on that.
He also needs to lay out some basic relationship parameters (customs, expectations, etc.) as he understands them so that Pandinus isn't just floundering in the dark.
Y'know, so she doesn't try to kill herself in an attempt to get his favor because she doesn't understand the rules of the game...
Hhheeeee. I like where this is going. "Simmer"? How adorable~!
6263678
I think it was an instance of equestrian song magic.
6263119 Same. I always skip songs in written form. Unlike you, I know the reason why I do it. I hate lyrics without melody, and so I dislike all written songs. It's pretty much dialogue trying to be a poem that is trying to be a song, and failing. And I really don't like poems.