• Published 27th Mar 2015
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Ynanhluutr - Imploding Colon



A newly transformed Rainbow Dash continues her flight east.

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That Wasn't So Bad, Was It?

“Kaji, Sora, Silver and the others came up with an idea,” Flare said. Gracefully, she unwrapped a cloth etched all over with coral motifs. “It may seem like nothing to a landwalker such as yourself, but it's the closest we have to a permanent token of affection.” At last, she produced a jagged blade. Trotting to the edge of the Swan Song's deck, she held it out to the pegasus hovering along the starboard side. “Do with it as you like. It's seen its purpose acted out.”

It was morning of the next day. The Swan Song and the Midnight Dreary had cruised out into the open waters east of the Nealand Atoll. Several Continentalists were already piloting their vessels east, safely sailing towards their various destinations at long last. Theanim Mane and a hoof-full of fellow travelers stood on board the Midnight Dreary, observing the exchange taking place. Sinrar and Nick stood side by side on board the Swan Song behind Flare, smiling serenely.

“Jee... I, uhh...” Rainbow Dash picked up the jagged blade while a levitating Rarity and Twilight Sparkle looked on. “I wish I could say that it looked familiar to me.” Her eyes darted over to Flare's. “Should it look familiar to me?”

Flare smiled. “It's the head of the one spear we could recover,” she said. “From stabbing Ultimo multiple times in glorious combat, of course.”

“Of c-course,” Rainbow said with a shudder. Upon closer inspection, she could see several stained splotches of red along the blade's serrated teeth. “I'll... uh...” She slid it swiftly into the left pouch of her satchel. “...I'll put it in safe-keeping for whenever I get nostalgic for horrendously violent whaling sport.”

“Heehee!” Flare giggled, rubbing her forelimbs together. “I'd knew you'd love it!” She glanced over her shoulder with a smug grin. “And Silver thought she'd enjoy the still-twitching heart carved out of a gutted shark!”

“Erm...” Sinrar squirmed.

“Ehmmm...” Nick squirmed harder.

Rarity leaned in to Rainbow Dash. “And just who is this 'Ultimo' when he's at home?”

Twilight leaned in from the other side. “He's a big mutant death fish that Rainbow Dash had to fight in order to get you back.”

Rarity's blue eyes twitched. “I beg your pardon?”

“Yeesh, we really need to get you caught up, don't we?”

SO THEN.” Rainbow Dash smiled wide, slightly frazzled. “I guess this is it, huh?”

“Don't think of it this as 'good bye!'” Flare touched down on board the Swan Song, hugging Nick close with a strong wing. “We'll all meet again to hunt sailfish in the afterlife, Verlaxion willing! Heeeee!”

“Erm...” Nick cleared his throat. “I'm sure Rainbow Dash would prefer to do less strenuous activities beyond death...”

“Hah! You can't melt if you don't have blood pumping! Whoop!

Sinrar sighed. “...this is going to be a long trip back home.”

Rainbow giggled. “Somehow, I think the long part is over.”

“If by that you mean my disastrously surly existence, I'm inclined to agree.” Sinrar leaned on his makeshift cane, smiling coyly. “It's never too late to turn a new leaf.”

“It won't be easy convincing other ponies of the realm beyond the Grand Choke,” Twilight said.

Rainbow cleared her throat. “Twilight's got a good point. Just how are you going to get ponies to listen to your new... uhhhh... West World Academics?”

Sinrar raised an eyebrow above his spectacles. “You forget, Harpy. I still have a shitload of notes gathered from years and years of research. Only—thanks to you—I'm able to combine everything and make a thesis on 'Val Roan Culture, Ancient and Modern.'”

“And if worse comes to worst,” Nick said. “With the Blight gone, what's to stop us from making a voyage west to validate the old stallion's claims?” He smiled victoriously. “I know a unicorn who's good at building swift ships!”

“And a mare who can kick the flanks of any privateers who try to rob it!” Flare added, sticking her tongue out.

“Heheheh...” Nick nuzzled the pegasus. “Darn straight!”

“Erm...” Rainbow Dash fidgeted in midair. “That sounds snazzy and all, guys, but don't forget about the Grand Choke. There's a friggin' endless desert waiting on the other side of that ocean, Blight or not—”

“Hey.” Nick shrugged. “One thing at a time, huh?”

“Oui,” Sinrar said, nodding. “If ancient Val Roans with primitive technology made it through the Blighted wasteland centuries ago, then I can't fathom what's preventing Kihutajans with twice the know-how and half the obstacles.”

“Heh...” Rainbow glanced aside at Twilight, smirking. “That's an awesome way of looking at it.” She turned back to the group and giggled. “Who knows?! Maybe in a few decades, you guys will be calling yourselves 'Continentalists' as well! But for a different reason.”

“I'm certainly excited by the prospect,” Nick said. “Still, Rainbow, it's super... charming that you would be so concerned for us.”

“I guess I can't help it.” Rainbow swallowed a lump down her throat and murmured, “If I spent another month with you guys, who knows. I might have wanted to adopt...”

“What's the use of a purple-eyed pet if its shaved hairless?” Sinrar rasped.

“Yeah, heheh—HEY!” Nick pouted.

“Hmmmm...” Flare nuzzled him closely. “I can think of a few usesssss...”

Nick blinked off into the horizon. “Buhhhh...”

“Great...” Sinrar rolled his eyes. “I may have to pilot the damn ship myself.” He waved at Rainbow Dash. “You'd better be shoving off, Mademoiselle. Nothing to see here but dust and dumbasses.”

“Don't sell yourself short, guys.” Rainbow Dash flapped her wings and touched down on the edge of the Midnight Dreary. “I'd never have gotten anywhere if it weren't for you two. Seriously.”

“Have a great journey, Rainbow Dash,” Nick said. He gave a tiny salute, smiling. “It was... a really nifty experience... b-bumping into you.”

“Best crash landing I can remember right now,” Rainbow said. She looked over her shoulder. “Doctor Mane?”

“Right.” Theanim Mane trotted up. Adjusting his goggles, he nodded towards the trimaran and its occupants. “Though it may fall on deaf ears, I extend the blessings of Verlaxion on each and every one of you. May she provide you a swift and safe passage home.”

“You know, despite the fashion in which you desperately cling to a ridiculously mind-numbing dogma, you're not half bad, doctor,” Sinrar droned. “You have innate scholarly curiosity, and that's something greatly lacking in most Rohbredden imbeciles.”

“Jee, thanks. I think.” Theanim smirked, his eyes narrow. “Is that your assessment as a fellow scientist, or—dare I say—a friend?”

“That's me trying his damnedest not to harpoon your stupid grin with my cane.” Sinrar rolled his eyes and trotted towards the cabin of the Swan Song. “Quelle sottise! Let us shove off already, mes petits chevaux.”

“Good bye, Thunker Meat!” Flare waved. “Hope you steal lots of pretty, pretty souls where you're going!”

“We'll see,” Theanim said, waving back. “I'll have to get more film in Rust. Among other things.” He shouted at the other occupants of his yacht. “We're shoving off!” With strong forelimbs, he unfurled the sail.

The Swan Song drew away, along with Nick and Flare's smiling faces. “So long, Rainbow Dash!” Nick said, hollering louder as the two ships grew more and more distant. “Stay awesome! And give my regards to Twilight and Rarity!”

“Done and done, kiddo!” Rainbow waved back. “Good luck with all of your... er... shipping!”

Flare's giggling voice could be heard one last time, and then all was waves and surf. The Swan Song turned about, reduced to a silver flash of aluminum that coasted its way around the Atoll, bending sharply west. Within a few minutes, it was yet another flickering glimmer along the sunlit horizon, and eventually the Atoll itself became an obscure piece of the undulating haze.

Rainbow Dash exhaled, leaning back as she gazed past the stern of the swiftly cruising Midnight Dreary.

“Well...” Rarity trotted around Rainbow Dash, smiling gently. “That wasn't so bad, was it?”

“Surprisingly...” Rainbow turned and gazed at her. “No. It wasn't.”

“They'll be fine, Rainbow,” Twilight said with a soft grin. “As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure we all agree that they're better off now that they've met you than they were before.”

“Yeah. Yeah, you're right.” Rainbow hugged herself slightly. “Still... nothing changes the fact that it still... mmm... sucks.”

“In what way?”

“Just...” Rainbow shrugged and shrugged again. “...living life in a straight line means you're always leaving stuff behind. I mean I dig the sights and the sounds... but it's never one hundred percent easy.”

“Well, think of it this way.” Rarity squatted down beside her, flouncing her mane with an elegant smile. “There are five things that you'll never be leaving behind.” Her eyelashes fluttered. “In fact, you're bound to gain them all. Handsomely so.”

Rainbow stared at her. She smiled. “I'm really... really glad to have you back, Rarity.”

“Mmmm... quite.” Rarity winked. “I'm glad to have myself back too.”

“And you, Twilight,” Rainbow said, looking at the other mare. “If... if only I could have had it like this from the beginning. Instead...” She gulped hard. “...instead of always searching.”

“What matters is that the search is proving fruitful in the end, Rainbow,” Twilight said in a pleasant tone.

“It is... isn't it?” Rainbow smiled.

Twilight smiled back. At last, she said, “Let's go get Pinkie, huh?”

“Heehee... yeah...” Rainbow turned and grinned in the direction of the vanishing Atoll. “... … ...whoop.”

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