26w, 1dFirst post on this site in a while, don't kill me >.> 0 comments · 27 views
56w, 2dTanks. 0 comments · 100 views
57w, 8hMOAR Strike Witches and ponies. 0 comments · 131 views
57w, 1dStrike Witches and Ponies. 5 comments · 141 views
60w, 3dSo... it's been a while. 5 comments · 67 views
64w, 2dSit down, it's time you learned the orgin of my OC. 10 comments · 66 views
66w, 9hArtist spotlight and a few story updates. (Yes, I do those.) 1 comments · 40 views
67w, 1d(Insert generic blog post title here.) 1 comments · 35 views
68w, 5dHere's another shout out to a very good, and underrated author. 2 comments · 40 views
69w, 3dDeadman Wonderland and ponies... What could go wrong? (Warning: A bit of blood.) 0 comments · 215 views
"As you all should know, Cave Johnson here, and Twilight and I will be making a volcano. And no, we won't be making those ones that shoot out that goop stuff like that one kid from bring your filly to work day. Originally, it was going to be real lava, but we didn't have the budget for that. So, we're taking whatever is left from the lab, and dumping it in a volcano-shaped container. Also, I'd like to introduce our backup scientist, Derpy!"
"Hello everypony watching and mom! Sorry, but Twilight had to take a break from testing, she said something about killer Canadian mayonnaise. So, I'll be filling in for her. For our first test, we shall be pressing large red buttons on scientific thingys," Derpy said as she sat upside down in a chair next to Cave Johnson in their lab.
"I couldn't have said it better myself. Poor Twilight, but we can't let her no-longer perfect attendance record get in the way of science. Now, let's transition to our experimental lab," Cave Johnson said.
"Wait, who are we even talking to?" Derpy asked. Cave only shrugged.
"Cave Johnson here, and we're back! Derpy and I are standing outside, in some meadow, a mile away from that glowing sticky stuff we threw into the plastic volcano. After about three minutes of staring at the substance, our research has determined that we can use the power of math to determine the level of damage this experiment will cause to Equestria. Derpy, punch those numbers in and see what we get." Derpy started hitting buttons on a calculator. She realized she didn't have fingers, and using calculators isn't possible. "What did we get, Derpy?"
"Muffins!" Derpy said.
"Good, I hate those donut-fakers we call bagels." Then the scientists held up hamsters to their eyes. Johnson lowered his, and said, "Uh, Derpy, these aren't binoculars." Derpy then lowered her hamster, blushed, and gave Cave a pizza. "Good idea!" Derpy continued to use the hamster as binoculars, while Johnson rolled up the pizza, and looked through it.
A mile away, at what they're looking at, we see a small, brown plastic volcano. A green substance bubbled and stirred inside of it. A small robotic arm, with the words, 'For science!' printed on it, went over the volcano, and dropped a blue rock into it. The green goop grew to massive size rapidly, swallowing everything in its path. Luckily, there were no towns nearby. Then green ninjas started jumping out of the stuff, using teddy bears as weapons. They also had poker night every Tuesday. But the teddy bear-wielding ninjas aren't important, our scientists are.
"Hmm, the ninjas are a nice touch. I think they came from our failed experiment, 'ninja-in-a-can.' Though I can't remember where the teddy bears came from," Johnson said to Derpy.
"Uh, that green stuff is getting kinda close. I think we should use the escape pods," Derpy said.
"You brought escape pods along?"
"Good thinking, let's use 'em." The two scientists jumped into a two-person escape pod that appeared behind them. The doors shut, and they launched into the sky. "So, where are we headed?"
"I don't know." The escape pod then started staggering, and fell into the goop it was flying over. "Hmm, now would be a good time for the ejection seats."
"Ejection seats in an escape pod? Talk about redundancy, I love it! Hit that large red button over there, that's usually the button that does the cool stuff." Derpy saluted, and slammed her hoof on the large red button. The ceiling opened up, and the seats shot out. The seats used rockets, and traveled back to the lab.
"Well, I'd say that was good science," Cave said to Derpy as they walked back into their lab.
"Wait, what happens to that green stuff then?" Derpy asked.
"I'm sure Celestia will take care of it. Just don't tell anypony it was us." They then highhoof'd each other, while Derpy said,