In the Equestrian Wasteland, there are few to no ways to ensure survival against the elements of the post-apocalyptic world. Staying hidden in a Stable is one way, but even that has its flaws, as not even the most heavily fortified and well-programmed of bunkers can prevent somepony from eventually getting in... or getting out.
And with raider ponies going around shooting up any place or pony they find, no matter where you hunker down, you’re gonna be in danger sooner or later. Unless you’ve got tons of crazy weapons at your disposal! ...which isn’t always the case, unfortunately. So really, the only way to ensure you survive is to be one of these two badass mares!
From Stable 2, originally a PipBuck-fixing unicorn who became widely known and feared as The Stable Dweller, we have Littlepip.
And from Stable 99, once a security mare who is now revered throughout the Wasteland as... uh… The Security Mare, we’ve got Blackjack!
To analyze these characters, we are first and foremost using information from their respective stories, both of which have been carefully combed through-
To my utter hatred of everything! Screw you, Project Horizons!
...however, seeing as the universe of Fallout: Equestria in both cases is taken from the Fallout series - primarily Fallout 3 and Fallout: New Vegas - we will also be taking notes from those games. Anything in the stories that is not outright stated will be determined through Fallout mechanics using hints from the stories, but only if such things do not seem unrealistic when compared to the world of Equestria.
So in other words: if it’s not said in the story, we figure it out through geeky game knowledge instead! And if it doesn’t work with Equestria, we scrap it!
In addition, because of the rapidly-changing arsenals of these two competitors, we will assume they have access to every weapon and type of aid they’ve used in their stories, but they will only start off with the weapons they are most known to use without exceeding their carrying limit, along with the set of armour they are wearing at the end or current point of their story. No aid will be provided immediately, and will have to be found around the battlefield as they go, in true Fallout style.
He’s Yah-Shee and I’m Arrell!
And it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armour, and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.
Real Name: Go Fish
Species: Cyber-alicorn (formerly unicorn pony)
Born: Stable 99, approximately 200 years after the Great War
Special talent: Winning
Former security mare
Varied equipment user
Suicidal tendencies
Poor weapon care
Once a security mare in Stable 99 near Hoofington, Go Fish - better known as Blackjack - wasn’t as good at her job as she should’ve been. She followed security detail, of course, but lacked the will to be as strict as she was supposed to be with rule violations. So instead, she spent most of her time hitting on a mare named Midnight... who probably wouldn’t even give her the time of day if it was her name.
Life was boring and lonely for BJ, until one day when a ton of raiders led by a Reaper named Deus invaded the Stable! Coming up with one of many horrible plans, Jackie downloaded the program they came for onto her PipBuck and ran away from the Stable to lure Deus away. And then she began spreading destruction through the Equestrian Wasteland almost as much as she spreads her legs!
However, we see rather quickly that Blackjack is...not a fan of what the Wasteland forces her to do, and her personality doesn’t mix well with it. She is mildly arrogant at first, thinking she knows all she needs to know about how to survive within a couple days. This leads to her ignoring the warnings of a young filly - who spent her entire life surviving out in the barren desert - and unintentionally summoning a swarm of ghouls that proceeded to tear said filly apart. ...literally.
...wow. That... I... I can’t even joke about that.
And that’s just in the third chapter.
...dammit.
Losing any sense of belief that she knew what to expect - not to mention most of her will to live - Blackjack forced herself to carry on, trying to “do better” and make up for her mistake. Instead, things only continue to get worse. She’s forced to mercy kill forty trapped colts and fillies, go back to Stable 99 and kill all its residents who have turned or are turning into mindless raiders, deal with her closest friend P-21 attempting to hang himself...
And she’s still going?! If all that crazy stuff didn’t kill her, I would’ve expected her to put a gun in her mouth!
Yeah... she tried. Blackjack does not, however, successfully take her own life. But eventually, after getting horrifically raped... while blinded, and missing all four of her legs and her horn... her heart and respiratory systems fail, and she dies.
...only to be later revived as a cyborg! Honestly, I don’t think our recap is giving anywhere close to the required amount of context to understand a damn thing about this story.
Agreed. The point here is that Blackjack has gone through all sorts of trials that make even the original Fallout games seem tame and family-friendly, and every time, she comes out on top.
And often with a hangover.
Blackjack is very impulsive, coming up with her plans on the fly and usually only taking time to think through them if somepony else is there to bounce ideas off of. Nevertheless, even her improvised methods of fighting and escape tend to work out in the end, though often with more casualties than she’d have liked - on her side or the enemy’s.
Her trademark weapon is her security baton, back from the days in Stable 99! Made from a hard enough metal to completely cave in an average pony’s skull with three or less direct hits, it’s the perfect item for close-quarters combat! And thanks to her magic, she can even use it at moderately far distances!
However, as time goes on, she seems to either lose or just forget about the baton, switching to using her firearms or other melee weapons instead. These replacement weapons include a claw made of bones which, despite not being very durable, has proven to be more deadly than her baton due to the sharpness.
But if you want sharpness, you want the Star Metal Sword! A blade literally forged from the metal of a star that landed on the planet, this is one of the deadliest close combat weapons you'll ever come across, and damn does BJ know how to use it! ...shame she lost it, though. So we'll just give her the security baton.
Aside from her melee weapons, she does specialize in a few guns, and seems to prefer combat shotguns over any other general firearm. Ironically, a combat shotgun is not part of her usual equipment; instead, she has Vigilance, a pistol; and Duty and Sacrifice, a pair of revolvers.
Vigilance is a 12.7mm pistol brought into Stable 99 by Blackjack’s ancestor, Card Trick, and handed down from daughter to daughter since! Despite its age, the weapon is in fantastic condition, and was recovered by Blackjack during her aforementioned revisit to - and slaughter of - her home Stable, purloined from her old bully Daisy, becoming her primary sidearm.
Duty and Sacrifice, meanwhile, appear to have become her main choice of firearm. They are five-shot .45 caliber revolvers with long barrels, once belonging to Vanity Blueblood before Blackjack took them from his locker in Miramare. They are larger, heavier, and more powerful than Vigilance, capable of punching through armour and exploding heads with ease; however, their low ammo capacity and slow reloading makes them tough to use nonetheless.
Blackjack has found and used other weapons in her time, such as Trottenheimer’s Folly and the Taurus Rifle; a powerful gun that infects ponies with Taint and a unique scoped hunting rifle, respectively! But for various reasons, she’s either lost or given away all of these weapons, so we’re not gonna be counting them among her main inventory since she’s already got other weapons that she still has in the story.
She uses a variety of different rounds in her weapons, from toxic to shock rounds, which all have varying effects. However, she can sometimes forget which rounds she currently has loaded, as well as their exact effects. Still, this variety can give her an advantage when she remembers to profit off of it.
Confusing ammo varieties aside, her weapons can also backfire by taking too much damage and breaking on her!
Yes; one major flaw of Blackjack’s is her apparent inability to take proper care of her arsenal. As a weapon begins to break, it deals less damage and occasionally jams, which can be a major problem in the middle of a battle. Due to not keeping track of her weapons’ condition, Blackjack often has to deal with this problem.
Even worse, those ammo varieties? They damage the gun even more than just shooting the bullets they come with!
But even without a weapon, Blackjack is nigh-unstoppable. When the chips are down, she can come up with the absolute worst and stupidest plans in pony history... and they’ll work.
Chased by giant robots piloted by crazy foals in an abandoned hospital? Play hide and seek to distract them! Surrounded by landmines and spider-bots along with a neurotoxin generator? Throw the generator on the mines to blow up the bots! Fighting a radscorpion bigger then Hasbro’s bank account? Make it kill itself with its own stinger!
And that’s when she’s armed. At one point relatively early in her journey, as in within a week and a half of leaving Stable 99 by her own recollections, she was caught by the Pegasus Enclave. After being stripped of everything she had on her, she was tossed into a locked cell in a locked room with two Enclave stallion guards ordered to beat her into paste with the use of Buck, Hydra, and Stampede; drugs that individually cause amazing increases in strength and endurance beyond normal pony capabilities.
Three minutes later, she walked out of the room unharmed and started killing everypony.
One useful aid to Blackjack is her ‘telekinetic bullets’, where she uses the force of her levitation magic to push against a target in such a way that it has the same impact as a physical bullet. How much she can do this, and how strong the ‘bullets’ are, depends on her current endurance and focus. She can even use these telekinetic bullets in S.A.T.S., despite them not really counting as a physical weapon.
But her greatest ally in the whole wide Wasteland? Alcohol! Send that mare the whiskey and she’ll be an unstoppable force and immovable object rolled into one crazy mare. Drunk Blackjack is the most competent direct killer around, and don’t you forget it!
Blackjack was at first a normal unicorn pony, but on two separate occasions, she underwent processes that turned her into a cyborg. The first one was a necessary amputation; due to too much exposure to enervation, her legs had devolved to the consistency of rubber, and so they were replaced with more powerful robotic ones. Parts of her head, including her eyes, were also replaced with cyborg substitutes because she almost died... well, technically, she did die, but then some weird spiritual stuff happened and she went back to regular life anyway, it's kind of hard to understand.
The second process basically involved either covering or stripping off almost all the skin on her body to coat her in hard metal plating, as well as implant wings on her back! This makes her much more defensive and sturdy, even able to take bullets to previously vulnerable parts of the body and shake them off. She's kinda like RoboCop, but she can actually move at an average pace.
Yet despite all the good things we have to say about her, she is not without her weaknesses - not by a long shot. For one thing, her magical strength is average at best, and the only spells she can pull off are levitation and the aforementioned telekinetic bullets; which, even then, are really just another use of her levitation.
And now that she’s a full-on cyborg, she may seem tougher, but it didn’t come without its own problems! The extra weight has made her heavy enough to, combined with her lack of swimming ability due to being raised in a Stable, almost drown in a puddle of blood.
It was kind of a large puddle…
Whatever!
In addition to that, while her harebrained schemes are often useful in getting out of trouble, it should be mentioned that the only reason she gets into trouble in the first place is because of her same mind that comes up with those schemes. She admits it herself: she is not a smart pony, and that affects her greatly. She’s fallen into traps and ended up putting herself and her friends in mortal danger, and almost every time, it’s her own fault.
As cool as it might be to play her up as a badass for getting out of all those situations, it’s a sad truth that everything would’ve been better if they never happened in the first place. And that’s not considering the times she would’ve just outright killed herself due to sheer stupidity if somepony like P-21 hadn’t been there to stop her in the nick of time! Like when she almost set off a grenade trap from Deus by not checking a suspicious wooden box specifically addressed to her for any wires!
Indeed. Blackjack may be one of the most dangerous, if not the most dangerous, pony in the entire Equestrian Wasteland... but at the same time, the pony she is the biggest danger to is herself.
"Yeah, I help ponies. Yeah, DJ Pon3 thinks I’m a hero. Me? I’m just Blackjack. And I’ll do whatever I have to against any enemy to survive and save my friends."
Species: Unicorn pony
Born: Stable 2, approximately 200 years after the Great War
Special talent: ??? (No, seriously, even Kkat says it's a mystery)
Extremely powerful telekinesis; little to no other magic
No particular faction
Skilled in lockpicking, sneaking, and hackingToaster Repairpony
Makes frequent use of S.A.T.S.
Born in Stable 2 and raised by a neglectful alcoholic mother, Littlepip was late in earning her cutie mark, being assigned various jobs in the meantime. She finally earned it when a child was lost in the Stable, and she stole a PipBuck to track him down.
The beginning of her kleptomaniac scavenging career!
Over the course of her dull life, Littlepip developed a fascination with a singer from the Stable named Velvet Remedy. When Velvet went missing, Littlepip went out into the Equestrian Wasteland after her to try and find her, being told by those in the Stable that if she ever came back, they wouldn’t let her in.
Dick move, but it started one of the greatest adventures ever told! Now with no place to call home even after she found Velvet Remedy, Littlepip decided to wander the Equestrian Wasteland, killing raiders and saving ponies. Even DJ Pon3 - no, not Vinyl Scratch, she’s dead - began broadcasting her achievements over the radio, and soon almost everypony saw her as a hero!
Of course, being the stereotypical humble hero she is, Littlepip refuses to believe any of this is true. In her mind, she’s either an ordinary pony who happens to have guns and sharpshooting companions, or a complete monster ponies fear more than they do Red Eye.
Which is definitely saying something. That guy’s a dick.
While we could analyze Littlepip to figure out her perks and skills ourselves, that’s actually been done already for us. Kkat, the author of Fallout: Equestria, released a character sheet containing all of Littlepip’s information in the style of a Fallout: New Vegas character.
First, her S.P.E.C.I.A.L. skills! She has a Strength and Endurance of 5, Perception and Charisma of 7, and Intelligence, Agility, and Luck of 8. This basically means that she’s more brains than brawn, but not lacking in the muscle compartment too much. Still, her Strength and Endurance are at an exact average, which means she can’t take as much punishment as would be useful in the situations she gets herself into.
She also has the traits Good Natured and Small Frame. In Fallout: New Vegas, Good Natured gives a +5 bonus to the skills Barter, Medicine, Repair, Science, and Speech, as well as a -5 to Energy Weapons, Explosives, Guns, Melee Weapons, and Unarmed. Essentially, this trait causes Littlepip to be better at social or technical skills, but weakens her in terms of combat. Meanwhile, Small Frame increases her Agility by 1, but also increases the damage her limbs take by 25%. This basically means, in the context of the story, that Littlepip is more agile than the average pony, but is significantly less resistant to physical damage.
She has 490 HP, 119 points to use in S.A.T.S., and a damage threshold of 25! ...which means basically nothing in terms of this battle, because she doesn’t fight like a Fallout character who’ll be standing upright looking all fine and dandy at 1 HP, only to instantly keel over dead if you smack their arm with a frying pan. She fights like a real pony, so the stats don’t tell us anything except that she can take a lot of hits, but the damage from each one isn’t much less than they would be for an average pony.
Listing her skills would take a long time, so to sum it all up: she has maxed out Firearms, Lockpick, Science, and Sneak. Most of her other skills are above average, but she has moderately low Survival, Repair, Unarmed, and Magic Energy. Plus, her Melee and Battle Saddles skills are downright atrocious, considering she’s level 30 - the maximum level. Fortunately, she doesn’t use melee weapons or battle saddles much, if at all, so she doesn’t suffer too badly from those losses.
Listing off her perks would take just as long, if not longer! So just trust us when we say that, for the most part, she’s basically got every perk she’d need to fit her own skills. And lastly, her listed armour is Canterlot Police Barding, which has no special effect but still works as very durable basic defensive armour.
Character sheet aside, there’s still plenty to talk about involving Littlepip. First and foremost, her personality. Aside from being humble, she is also brave, willing to risk her life for pretty much anything. However, this has also shown to be a flaw, as she ends up causing problems while trying to stop others, and often pushes herself way past her limit.
Besides being stubborn and self-deprecating, there’s more to her personality. She’s snarky and cynical, but at the same time, pretty optimistic about the future of the Wasteland - when things aren’t going to hell. Which they usually are.
Indeed; while Littlepip has hope for the future, her hope doesn’t seem to transition to present events very well, leaving her doubting the success of whatever mission she’s on no matter how much she’s assured it’ll be fine. Then again, the Equestrian Wasteland is very good at breaking ponies like her. She did come out of a sheltered Stable with no fighting experience whatsoever.
And it didn’t even take her a month to make a name for herself. Didn’t even take her twenty-four hours to kill a pony!
Littlepip is adaptable to change, but only when not bombarded by it all at once. She can learn to use new guns quickly, she figures out the general layout of new places within a short time, and she’s shown enough intelligence to analyze her opponents and figure out the best course of action even with other things going on. That said, if too many sudden changes happen that make her feel like the whole world has turned upside-down, she tends to break and become very confused and weak until she can adjust.
Luckily, life-shattering events aren’t too common in these battles. Except death.
On the topic of flaws, perhaps Littlepip’s greatest weakness is her addiction to Party Time Mint-als. After discovering the clarity they gave her mind, she began to feel as though she couldn’t properly function without them, worrying her companions and eventually forcing Velvet Remedy to knock her out and take her to a doctor. Since then, she’s done her best to avoid the stuff, but when they appear during her scavenging, she obviously feels tempted.
And we all know how hard it is to break a bad habit or addiction. Especially to something that can pop up literally when you least expect it.
Plus, this is one flaw that Blackjack is aware of. While temporarily traveling with Littlepip-
What?!
It happened. While temporarily traveling with Littlepip, Blackjack was asked to help her get rid of her supply of Party Time Mint-als, and was clued in on her major addiction. At the end of their adventures, Littlepip had her memories of the past few days removed as part of a plan to stop the Goddess, so she forgot all about Blackjack. Blackjack, however, has not forgotten about her.
Way to go, Pipsqueak. Letting your future foe know your greatest weakness.
Her moral outraging is also a major flaw. If she finds something that she deems immoral, such as cannibalism, she goes on a rampage until she thinks the problem is solved - in other words, everypony who looks at her funny has no less than eight bullet holes in them.
Sounds like a good solution in my book! But enough of her flaws. We get it, she ain’t perfect, what’s she good at?
Littlepip’s magical skill lies almost entirely in levitation and telekinesis. The only other spell she knows is a bit of hemokinesis - blood magic - from the dark zebra artifact known as the Black Book, which she has been seen using for two purposes: forming a blade out of blood, or manipulating the blood from open wounds to form a cast. However, she refuses to use this spell for the first purpose, due to it reminding her of the temptation caused by the Black Book, and so she only uses hemokinesis to patch up bleeding wounds.
Getting back to her levitation, it’s so precise and powerful she can make an entire carriage fly! ...for a brief time. Still, it works! And she can use it so precisely, she can pick a lock without tools by just magically moving the tumblers. Why she still prefers a bobby pin and a screwdriver when she can do that, I have no idea!
The only other unique ability she has is a regenerative property from exposure to the Goddess’ alicorn-making mutagen. This allows her to heal wounds automatically, but only over time. However, it’s also enough to let her regrow completely severed limbs... but again, over time. Time usually not available in these battles, unfortunately.
She doesn’t really have any outstanding special abilities aside from those. Everything else about her really boils down to her equipment! And I’m not talking about her-
Stop.
...
Littlepip’s weapon of choice is Little Macintosh, a double-action revolver originally commissioned by Applejack and named after her older brother. It comes with a scope on the top to help with aiming, and its ammunition is the rare .44 Magnum, which comes with armour-piercing variations.
.44 Magnum ammo is tough to find in the Wasteland, even in the games. It’s hard to even find being sold by shopkeepers, and if it is, there’s barely enough to fill your gun twice! That little ammunition for a gun like this makes it damn dangerous, but if you run out in the middle of a fight, there’s no way in hell you’ll be able to find more ammo for it until the battle’s over!
Aside from Little Macintosh, she also is known to use an enchanted zebra rifle that shoots in three-shot bursts and lights foes on fire, burning them alive. It can even incinerate Steel Rangers through their Power Armour.
Her only other signature weapon is a sniper rifle. Everything else, she just grabs and uses wherever she finds it! Pistols, shotguns, assault rifles; she’s used pretty much every type of gun to ever exist, but Little Macintosh and the zebra rifle are the only ones she’s particularly known for. Which makes sense, given how much she uses them!
Aside from her weapons, her previously-discussed armour, and the general aid that is available in the Equestrian Wasteland, Littlepip’s only other piece of equipment is her PipBuck 3000. While this has the same function as any other PipBuck, what makes it unique - in a way - is that, after exposure to the Pink Cloud, it has become fused with Littlepip’s leg. This makes it impossible to remove, and Littlepip often complains about it itching.
In terms of its actual functions, Littlepip tends to use S.A.T.S. to take perfect aim at her foes and dispatch them with deadly accuracy, even more than you’d expect somepony to. I mean, it’s cool and all, but... come on, aim with your own eyes sometime!
Her reliance on S.A.T.S., and her equipment in general, may explain why Littlepip hasn’t grown much in terms of physical strength despite her trek throughout the Wasteland. She lets her guns do the work for her, never getting in too close to her enemies, meaning she could easily be caught off guard by a foe within foreleg’s length.
Of course, that’s assuming they’d even get that close in the first place…
While Littlepip relies on her equipment a fair amount, it hasn’t failed her yet, as she’s survived every battle she’s gotten herself into. She’s a competent fighter and a master strategist, whether on the spot or with time to plan. And while she does travel with and often rely on her companions for help, she’s more than capable of holding her own as a lone wanderer. If anything, her friends are there more for moral support and after-battle healing than actually assisting her in battle.
Of course, she’d be dead a hundred times over without them, but probably not from being shot. With her own stubborn “I don’t need to rest” attitude, the only thing that could kill her is herself! ...and maybe radiation poisoning. But mainly herself!
However, that in itself is a downfall for her. After spending so much time in the Equestrian Wasteland, witnessing death after death, she’s become... broken. She doesn’t seem to value her own life at all, being perfectly willing to die just to protect somepony for a little while longer. Then again, with Sacrifice as her virtue, that’s pretty much expected.
She walks into places thinking she’s gonna die, and she doesn’t care as long as it helps somepony else! I don’t know if that’s really freaking brave, or really freaking stupid!
Well, that’s all a matter of perspective. All I’ll say is that, with all her skills and experience, despite her claims to the contrary... she is a very clever pony.
“I am Littlepip. Damaged, but not defeated... you don’t win.”
Alright, the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all.
IT’S TIME FOR AN EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTLE!
The Equestrian Wasteland is as it has always been: dry, deserted, and dangerous. One of many abandoned towns, Ponyville, had been the spot of many a raider camp for who knows how long, until they had been mostly wiped out by a certain stable dweller.
Now, the town is ripe for scavenging; having briefly left her crew to gather supplies, a cyber-alicorn finds herself wandering through the town, focusing more on looting the mostly untouched bodies of raiders - and killing any remaining stragglers - than searching the buildings themselves.
Not too far away, however, she is being watched through a scope.
What is that? a gray unicorn mare thinks to herself, lowering the sniper rifle and sighing. Better go check... could be dangerous.
The pony down below, meanwhile, simply sighs as she leans back against a wall, two dead bodies to her left. Opening her pack, she takes out a bottle of Wild Pegasus Whiskey, about to take a drink...
BANG! CRASH!
And just like that, the bottle is gone, shattered to pieces and the liquid dropping onto the ground. Raising an eyebrow, the mostly metal pony turns her gaze, seeing a slightly familiar face approaching.
"Who are you, and what are you doing here?" the unicorn demands, sniper rifle hovering in her telekinetic grip.
Grinning, the cyber-alicorn steps onto all fours, lighting her horn. "Just a mare who loves her alcohol, trying to indulge in a drink." Out from her back comes an engraved pistol. "And you took it from me."
"Just answer the question, will you?" the unicorn snaps. "You only get one warning shot!"
"Oh?" The pistol spins around before suddenly firing, causing the gray mare to jump to the side, barely avoiding a bullet to the leg. "Well, there it is. Now I'm aiming for the head."
The unicorn's eyes narrow. "Are we really going to do it like-" Another shot barely grazes her ear, and she ducks instinctively. "Okay, yep, we are."
With a chuckle, Blackjack starts firing Vigilance at her less-protected foe, who is forced to just run away into a building to get away. Smirking, she quickly switches her weapon out for two sidearms, stomping towards the building with both guns twirling in her magical hold.
As soon as she gets close, however, Littlepip jumps right back around the corner, going into S.A.T.S., aiming three shots at Blackjack's head from Little Macintosh. As soon as she comes out of the slow-motion program, she fires three times at her target. Sure enough, all three bullets hit, but barely slow her down as they bounce off the metal plating around her head. Blackjack simply raises her guns and starts firing as Littlepip darts back into the building, rummaging around in a box for something more to fight with.
Trotting in, Blackjack pulls out Vigilance again, taking aim as the other unicorn is looking through. Glancing at her PipBuck, however, Littlepip is able to notice and quickly toss one of the box's contents behind her: a hoof grenade. Eyes widening, Blackjack has to quickly jump back to avoid the blast, giving her foe enough time to get out of the way and start running up a set of mostly crumbled stairs. The cyber-alicorn tries running up after her, but isn't quite as fast, and reaches the top of the stairs just as Littlepip turns around and unloads some more .44 bullets into her.
Hissing, Blackjack goes into her own S.A.T.S., targeting Littlepip's head with two shots each from Duty and Sacrifice. Seeing this coming just in time, she quickly ducks, three bullets passing right over her while the last embeds itself in her shoulder. She winces, giving just enough of an opening for Blackjack to pull out her security baton and pounce, swinging down at her head.
Lifting her leg instinctively, Littlepip blocks the baton with her PipBuck, a loud metallic clang ringing out. Frowning, Blackjack tries swinging again, but her foe has picked up a pattern; she keeps moving her leg, using the PipBuck glued to it as a makeshift shield. Deciding to try firearms again, the cyber-alicorn backs up and pulls her sidearms out, but Littlepip is quicker; yanking out her zebra rifle, she fires three bursts, setting fire to the metal-coated mare.
Screaming, Blackjack quickly goes into S.A.T.S. again, less to aim and more to think. Hatching a makeshift plan, she shoots two telekinetic bullets at her foe's head, not bothering to put much strength into them. The headache that ensues gives her enough time to run past her quickly, the flames flickering out, and jump out the window.
Once she recovers, Littlepip runs over to the window as well; however, rather than jumping out, she pulls her sniper rifle out and starts looking down the scope, scouring the barren streets. "Where did you go..."
For several tense moments, she sits there, looking around for any signs of movement. Finally, a flicker from a distant building tells her where she needs to go. Packing the rifle away, she runs to go down the stairs.
Several houses had been untouched, leaving plenty of supplies for Blackjack to pick up. Mostly caps and ammo, but a couple weapons and some aid here and there as well, even a StealthBuck. She knows she doesn't have much time, and just stocks up on anything important-looking. A riot shotgun sticks out, and she smirks as she grabs it, checking the remaining bullets. Only four shots left, but there'd be more ammo around for sure.
BANG! Just in time, too; a shot from Littlepip's sniper rifle just went right into the wall beside her. Turning around, another shot rings out from the distanced mare, this one actually hitting the cyber-alicorn in the chest. Growling, Blackjack whips her new shotgun out and gallops out the door after her assailant, receiving several more shots to the legs and chest along the way.
Panicking, Littlepip puts the now-empty sniper rifle away and pulls out Little Macintosh, opening up S.A.T.S. when Blackjack is less than six feet away. Thinking fast despite the slowed-down time, she aims one bullet at the mare's horn, the others at random parts of her body to try and spread the damage out. The first shot is a success, disrupting her magic and causing her to drop the shotgun, while the other bullets cause her to back up just a bit.
"Are you a raider?" Littlepip yells as she pulls out her zebra rifle again. "A slaver? You have wings, too; are you one of the Goddess's alicorns?"
Blackjack just grins, cracking her neck. "You only wish I was that easy to kill."
The cyber-alicorn grabs Vigilance, and the two begin shooting at each other, dodging or tanking one another's hits and occasionally making use of S.A.T.S. for more specific targets. Running low on ammo, Blackjack doesn't have time to reload, and instead simply switches to Duty and Sacrifice, making better use of the dual wielding than she had with the single pistol moments ago. However, even those start to run low on ammo, while Littlepip is still going strong. With some quick thinking, Blackjack hatches a plan, and her horn glows slightly brighter as she activates S.A.T.S. once more.
A telekinetic bullet fires off, hitting Littlepip right in the skull; wincing, she falls back, grabbing her head. Running forward, Blackjack swings a hoof, landing a hard uppercut on the chin and knocking the unicorn into the air. Flapping her robotic wings, she takes off after her, grabbing her dropped shotgun along the way. Turning it around, before gravity can take control and start dragging Littlepip down, she fires off two shots.
To her surprise, the bullets stop midair, a faint magical glow around them. Littlepip grins... and then starts falling.
Swooping down, Blackjack grabs the unicorn before she can hit the ground and starts flying up as fast as she can. "You really wanna know who I am, pipsqueak?"
Struggling to get free, Littlepip latches onto what could be the only distraction. "...who are you?"
Blackjack smirks down at her. "I'm Security." And then she lets go.
Once again separated, the two mares hike through the town, looking for each other. While Littlepip is still breathing sighs of relief, Blackjack is cursing herself. Celestia dammit... who would've thought a unicorn could be strong enough to levitate herself?!
Along the way, they've been picking up old weapons and extra ammo, as well as some aid here and there. Despite being very close to one another, they have yet to actually lock eyes once again.
Keeping an eye on the radar part of her PipBuck display, Littlepip continues to search any body or container she comes across. At first, she takes empty ones as a sign of Blackjack's presence; however, realizing the town may have been scavenged before, she discards all thoughts on the subject and begins growing frustrated. With a loud groan, she opens another first-aid box on the wall, finding...
A container of Party Time Mint-als.
She stops short, staring at the container with her breath practically still. Her mind is at war, half telling her to grab it and the other half telling her to walk away. Neither seem to be winning out, and she has to try and refocus, forcing herself to take slow steps backwards.
BANG! And then a shot nails her in the leg.
Spinning around with a wince, she sees Blackjack, having tracked her down with her own PipBuck radar. Aiming Vigilance for another shot, this one likely to be fatal, she goes to pull the trigger, only to have the gun grabbed in her foe's own magic. Eyes widening, she tightens her own levitation grip, and the two begin tugging it back and forth.
For several long seconds, their eyes stay locked, horns lit as the gun continues to spin and move between the two, the trigger yet to be pulled. Trying to fake her out, Blackjack loosens her grip just a bit, but Littlepip is too quick; she takes the minor opening to spin the gun and fire as many shots as she can. Most of them miss, but a few slam into the metal, one going right onto one of her wings.
Throughout all this, the cyber-alicorn fails to realize the whole thing is a distraction. By the time she glances down and sees the grenade, it's too late; it explodes, kicking up plenty of dust to obscure her as Littlepip finally wrenches Vigilance to herself, backing up and watching to see what happens.
A security baton and very pissed off cyber-alicorn is what happens, flying out and both aiming for her head.
She lifts her foreleg to block it, but Blackjack simply changes her aim and slams the metal baton down on Littlepip's leg, right below her PipBuck. She screams, the rest of her legs buckling, and Blackjack brings it down again. A satisfying crunch is heard, and she grins.
"You know, we could have just walked by each other," she points out. "You shot me first. Consider this karma."
Littlepip growls. "May the princesses fuck you with-" She cuts herself off with a scream as the baton is brought down one more time, and she collapses to the ground.
"What was that?" Blackjack taunts, turning to grab Vigilance from where it had been left on the floor. "Couldn't hear you over your-" When she turns back, another grenade has set itself right at her hooves.
Panicking, this time she grabs it in her magic, planning to throw it away; or better yet, right at her opponent. But as soon as her magic goes around it, it changes form... no, it reverts to its true appearance. Littlepip had cast an illusion spell on what it truly was to make it look like a grenade.
And what it truly was, was a memory orb.
Finally, the memory went away, and Blackjack was brought back to reality. Groaning, she opens her eyes to look around, finding herself in yet another building. This one looks to be the remains of Carousel Boutique. Various heavy pieces of furniture have been dropped on her to keep her pinned to the ground, and her weapons have all been moved far away. Littlepip sits nearby, watching and waiting with zebra rifle in magical grip.
"Good. You're awake." She glares. "I'm really getting sick of you."
"The feeling is mutual," Blackjack grumbles as she tries to squirm her way out. Even for her increased strength, the furniture is too heavy to let her up. "So... I guess you kill me now?"
"Hopefully that's how this goes." She aims the gun. "If not, we'll just keep trying. Any last requests?"
Blackjack pauses. "...any chance I could have that drink you robbed me of? I think there's some more whiskey in my bad."
Littlepip blinks, then sighs. From the bag in the corner floats out a half-empty bottle that deposits itself in front of the cyber-alicorn. "Hurry up."
"Thank you, you're too kind." Picking the bottle up in her fading magic, Blackjack takes a long swig before tossing it aside. "Ahh... much better."
"Good, because things are about to get much worse." Littlepip aims once again.
Without hesitating any longer, she pulls the trigger. Multiple times. The bullets hit their mark, setting the mare on fire beneath her metal coating, screaming all the while. Littlepip doesn't stop firing until the clip is empty, and even then she just loads a new one in and waits to see if it would be necessary.
After a few minutes, the screams die down to silence. While this would normally seem good, it actually worries Littlepip. She gets up and walks closer to get a better look.
Blackjack was gone.
Eyes widening, she begins pulling the pieces of furniture aside, as if she had just wormed her way deeper. She doesn't even get halfway through when the rest suddenly all burst off as Blackjack stands up, StealthBuck deactivating and wings flared. "Thanks."
Despite the pain from the fire, it's no trouble for Blackjack to leap forward and clobber her right on the head, knocking her down so her chin collides with the floor rather roughly. Once there, the cyber-alicorn brings her hoof up to knock Littlepip straight up and into the ceiling, where she almost sticks for a few seconds before falling back down to the ground.
Lying prone, she can't stop Blackjack's next attack: grabbing her security baton, with one well-aimed smack, she finally solves Littlepip's problem of her PipBuck being attached to her leg... by removing her hoof and half of her foreleg entirely.
A loud scream pierces the moderately quiet wasteland town. All at once, Littlepip feels all sorts of feelings; pain, exhaustion, anger, sadness, and regret. But the last one is one that has helped her through plenty of similar situations: determination.
As Blackjack lifts the baton for one final smack to the head, Littlepip does the one thing she can think of: grabs Blackjack's horn in her magic and twists it, interrupting her magic and causing the baton to fall to the floor. Grabbing it with her own flickering magic, Littlepip turns the tables, smacking her several times with the baton as she gets back up onto three legs, the cyber-alicorn finding her trusty security baton to be good even against her own sturdy metal plating.
"I." Littlepip smashes the baton against her head again. "Am." Another smash, this one against her opponent's foreleg, letting her feel a fraction of the pain the gray unicorn is currently dealing with. "Tired."
With that, she lifts it and brings it down once more for a final attack.
...only for Blackjack to slip into S.A.T.S. as a last ditch effort. She grabs her shotgun from a short distance away and unloads a round into Littlepip's chest, knocking her over. Another shot, this one to Littlepip's other foreleg, immediately severing it. Now out of ammo, she shrugs and tosses the gun away as she steps over the nearly lifeless unicorn mare.
"Then rest."
Three full power telekinetic bullets straight to Littlepip's skull, and her head explodes like a grenade.
The action calms down, and Blackjack sighs as she nearly collapses as well. But before she can allow herself to rest, there's still one thing she has to do.
Carefully, she picks the corpse up and drapes it across her back before walking away, a noticeable limp to her step, to find a place to bury this worthy foe.
K.O.
...and there we go. It's over.
Before anyone guesses it; no, the result was not reached due to Blackjack's special talent being "winning". For the sake of the battle being fair, we ignored that and focused only on other attributes. Both fighters have their pros and cons to outweigh one another, but in the end, this was the result. While both combatants are skilled in various fields, Blackjack simply had more experience than Littlepip in a few too many.
Littlepip may have been out of the Stable first, but she didn't kill quite as many things in her first few excursions as Blackjack! Time doesn't always translate directly to experience. And even if it did, what good is experience if you don't have a good weapon by your side?!
In order to determine a winner, we considered every possible matchup these two could've had involving their equipment. Blackjack would crush Littlepip in hoof-to-hoof or melee combat, and between their weapons, Littlepip would have only won two out of the possible matches. Her sniper rifle against Blackjack's baton, due to her just being too far away to be hit while having a weapon meant for ranged fire; and her zebra rifle against Duty and Sacrifice, as the latter would take too long to reload when up against three-shot bursts.
Every other matchup, Blackjack won due to a combination of experience with her weapon, Littlepip's lack of knowledge of her foe's arsenal, and just the pure power differences. And when we compared the two with their full arsenals, allowing them to change weapons on the fly, we decided it would've come out to a tie with both of them out of ammo. Except Blackjack, of course, who would've still had her baton.
We also took into account them finding other weapons, ammo, or aid around the battlefield, running on the assumption that they could find literally anything that wasn't one-of-a-kind or specific to a particular area. Littlepip had a slight advantage here due to her variety of weapon usage, but Blackjack wasn't too far behind, and just the fact that she was skilled with melee weapons in addition to ranged ones gave her an immediate advantage. For aid, healing items could be discovered, but Littlepip tends to wait until a battle is over or she has a break before healing, making them pretty much useless. Plus, if Littlepip ever found any Mint-als, she would at the very least hesitate, leaving her vulnerable.
And if Blackjack found an alcoholic beverage? Littlepip would be screwed.
Other comparisons we did included their personalities, damage resistance, experience, and more; however, Blackjack came out on top almost all the time. Her aggressive nature would make her less predictable than Littlepip, her cyborg body makes her much less vulnerable to attacks, and she's killed far more exceptionally dangerous things than Littlepip has.
Littlepip's greatest accomplishment in the field of "giant creature slaying" was just barely managing to kill a dragon. Blackjack killed one of her own no problem; along with a gun-riddled tank pony, a giant-ass radscorpion, a boat full of well-armed Steel Rangers, a whole Stable full of raiders, and Rampage! ...only temporarily for that last one, obviously, but... Rampage!
When you count it all up, Littlepip may be more heroic, but the side you fight for doesn't matter on the battlefield. All that matters is who survives at the end of the day, and today, it was not her.
Seems like Blackjack finally fulfilled her Duty, and Sacrificed Littlepip!
The winner is Blackjack.
Next time on DEATH BATTLE: Equestria...?
...
...
...Something, apparently.
powerful telekinesis indeed, by the end. Its at pars as a pure alicorn's and she does have a wide array of weaponry..
also did i say powerful telekinesis?
other than that, no complaints. Then again, the outcome may be different if Blackjack was still a unicorn herself and not a cyber alicorn. But all in all, this fight was amazing. Though, i expected them to talk once BJ got out of the memory orb, but for the sake of battling.. ehh.. fun times
5535875 The author's note is supposed to be the continuation of that.
5535889 Realistically the talking would have happened at that point and all would have been well. But that had to be ignored for the sake of it being, well, a Death Battle.
5535898
Oh, okay, my bad.
I'm sowwy.
Please explain? If you can that is.
Even against Aoi the Lunar Legend? I thought for sure he was going to win.
5536109 I'm also curious.
5536109
5536298
5536345
Lucario would have defeated all of his opponents in the tournament due to advantages in strength, speed, abilities, intelligence, or any combination thereof. While there are some combatants who could beat him, they would be beaten by someone they'd face first, and then Lucario could beat them later. Frankly, had the tournament bracket been decided differently, he could have lost.
Sometimes the original isn't always the best.
Blackjack is just a cut above the rest.
I liked the battle, of course, but, if we're being realistic, it would have ended as soon as Littlepip took a bullet to the shoulder. It'd probably destroy the joint and render the limb useless, and that's a death sentence for a quadruped.
5536532 Littlepip has taken that sort of abuse in her story and it's affected her about as much as a punch in the face would for you and me; painful and will throw you off for a second, but you can still keep going. That's what the wasteland does to ponies, and in the actual Fallout games, it's pretty similar (it takes several shotgun bullets to the head just for you to start occasionally having trouble seeing).
5536539
Granted, but I was just saying that she'd be screwed in a realistic situation, not counting fictional durability.
The Caribou (Fall of Equestria) vs The Saints (Saints Row)
5536477 you take that right out of the deadpoll vs daethstrick lol
oh my gosh I've been waiting ages for this battle and I was not disapointed!
now, who do you think would win if they had each other's arsenals?
5537201 That depends on if you mean it was a sudden switch before the battle, or they were just as skilled with the weapons as they would be if they always used them. If it was just a sudden switch, Blackjack would win because her weapons would be much harder to get used to, and thus Littlepip would be vulnerable; if they had actual experience with the weapons, Littlepip would win because now she would be the one with the melee advantage, and she'd have a total of three guns for regular combat use as opposed to two (sniper rifle isn't very good for fast-paced fighting). The nails in the coffin would be hammered in even quicker if she had Blackjack's telekinetic bullets; since her levitation magic greatly surpasses Blackjack's, she could fire more and stronger bullets with better aim.
5536477 ...damn, never even noticed that.
5537237
I'm not familiar with blackjack's crew but with littlepip calamity velvet steelhooves and maybe zenith vs blackjack and her friends who would win?
annoying question pestering mode activated (blame my friend)
5537245 That's difficult to tell, frankly. I can't really give an answer.
5537251
littlepip wins by default, then
5537254 ...no, she doesn't.
5537259
5537240 , Just be thankful that neither of them can break the fourth wall.
Thinking back, littlepip loses by default. Because didn't the end of FO:E say that all that damage she took on her adventure finally started to add up?
Since I can't argue with that I'll take you word for it.
Though to let you guys know I did write Knightmare vs. Valiant, but RLYoshi hasn't posted that, but if he doesn't want to post it since the tournaments dead than that's fine.
Though for the other characters that I researched, Ace would of beat Ivan (though it is a very close match) and Aoi would of curbstomped Jake Gray.
5537687 Yes, but I judged them based on their peak conditions rather than necessarily most recent.
5537968 that would be fair... though the pipbuck fusing to her leg was one of her more recent injuries before the end if I remember correctly. And I'm debating starting to read project horizons at some point, this chapter almost guarantees I give it a look.
A little disappointed but not really surprised.
What did surprise me was the things you missed. If I remember correctly Little Pip has her Stealthbuck Mark 2. And as a cyborg, Blackjack is really vulnerable to anti-matrix grenades, if Littlepip is lucky enough to find them (unless of course Blackjack is for some reason immune to them). Also as far as 'kill credit' goes you didn't credit Littlepip with the Super Alicorn, a chapter of Steel Rangers, an Enclave Raptor, or the Goddess. Yeah, she had help with all of those, but not much more then she did with the dragon. All that said, I don't think any of these would make a significant enough difference.
The other nasty surprise was how poorly written the battle sequence was. The most glaring fault is the whole memory orb sequence. Yeah, I get that the fight is just a dramatized version of the results, but Littlepip isn't the sort of character to let an opponent wake up when she can kill them painlessly while they are lost in the orb. This isn't the only example, and I know some OOC behavior is expected in Pony Death Battle, but it was particularly glaring in this chapter.
5540067 The battle is purely for entertainment purposes. Everything about the characters was taken into account, but not all of it could really be used in the battle; if it wasn't particularly important, I still factored it in, but left it out of the actual battle and didn't give it a mention in the research bits. Hence the lack of the StealthBuck Mk II (I couldn't find a situation to make Littlepip use a StealthBuck) and anti-matrix grenades (the chance of her finding any was too low).
And I didn't give her "kill credit" because I just wanted to point out how Blackjack has, regardless, done far more than Littlepip in terms of killing. It was just a throwaway line at the end, and I wanted to emphasize "Blackjack killed all this, Littlepip killed just this" while keeping Arrell in character.
And the memory orb sequence had originally had Littlepip waiting for Blackjack to wake up, then trying to talk it out while Blackjack makes a plan to get free, but a pre-reader said that didn't make sense for Blackjack to ignore the talking. I couldn't think of any way to justify it by that point, but I wanted to give a shout out to Littlepip's "memory orb illusion" tactic because it did have an important role in the research. So I just cut out the dialogue at the last minute and made it seem like Littlepip only waited for her to wake up to ask if she had any last requests.
I get that you didn't like the battle sequence, but keep in mind it has nothing to do with the research. It's for fun, and as long as I'm not making huge mistakes (cough Master Chief throwing a grenade through the drop shield cough), I see no problem with taking a little artistic license and writing an enjoyable battle at the cost of a few nitpicky research bits being ignored for the battle only.
Tournaments cancelled?
Meh...
5539130 It was actually towards the middle. Admittedly maybe a little after the "peak condition" version I used, but that didn't really affect anything I don't think.
That was definitely worth the wait. I've got to say, the battles have just been getting better and better each time.
Well, I'm glad you're not canceling this; I've always enjoyed seeing how the cute little cartoon ponies (and others) do there best to kill each other. Huh, saying that out loud makes me sound like a straight up psycho...
As for a suggestion for a future battle maybe Red Ink/Roscherk from the 'Where Loyalties Lie' series vs. Jericho from 'Jericho'. One is a Pegasus with pyromantic abilities who somehow convinced the princesses he should be the Captain of the Honor Guard and the other is the demon-slaying Gunslinger. They have got to be the most destructive 'good guys' (though anyone would hesitate to call them such) out there, and who doesn't love a battle of the anti-heroes?
5543128 Interesting idea. I'll put that down.
Scholar from Resuscitatio Artium Magicarum vs. Titan from The Immortal Game!
Pokey pierce from this comic here vs prince blueblood from this fanfic here. Both bad dates but one at least didn't attempt to black mail their date into bed. I like the prince even the canon version in the show and see this version of pokey as a much more reasonable guy to be called the worst date ever.
5537948 Who won? I was counting on Valiant winning the entire tourney, but that clearly didn't happen
Darn, I was hoping for Littlepip to win. Then again, she's the only pony I know of well in the Fallout: Equestria series.
And wait a minute. I thought one of the rules of Death Battle is "No Mercy"? By allowing Blackjack a drink, Littlepip showed mercy, even if she was going to (try to) kill her later.
I guess there's hope yet for MY OC to participate in a Death Battle (pictured in my profile, but minus the minigun, and his horn is just obscured or the artist forgot to draw it), though I still have a long way before he's…eligible. Maybe once I reach "Season 2"'s end. Or before "Season 3". He won't be having any significant extra spells in his arsenal by then.
Update complete.
List of Combatants by Race:
Unicorns: Trixie (W-W), Sweetie Belle (L), Twilight Sparkle (L-L), Rarity (L), The Flim-Flam Brothers (W), Vinyl Scratch (L), Brand Fire (L), Seth Disarmonia (W), Littlepip (L)
Earth Ponies: Applejack (L-L), Apple Bloom (L), Pinkie Pie (W-L), Big Macintosh (W-L), Plymouth Valiant (W), Hunger Pains (L), Big Lugnut (robot, but still) (L), Fluffle Puff (W)
Pegasi: Rainbow Dash (W-L), Scootaloo (W), Hovermic (W), Fluttershy (W), Ditzy Doo (W), Dark Lightning (L), Vinetion Lutin (L), Blue Breeze (W), Quick Fix (L), Azzal Khan (L), Scarlet Lightning (L), The Wonderbolts (L), Ritz Korimere (L)
Alicorns: Ominous (can access this form) (L), Nightmare Moon (W-D), Tundra Stanza (L), Abstract the Dark (Crystallion) (L), Nyx (L), Shadow Blitz (L), Blackjack (well, cyber-alicorn) (W)
Griffons: Gilda (L-L), Griffin (W)
Changelings: Queen Chrysalis (L), Knightmare Demonbane (W)
Humans: Rylan Watch (L), Mario Bros. (W), Little Mac (W), Jake Gray (W)
Other: Mobius (Aries Leo Sagittarius) (W), Echo (diamond dog) (L), Iron Will (minotaur) (L), ATLAS and P-Body (machines) (L), Discord (draconequus) (L), Arrell Ragnarok (windigo) (W), Lucario (Pokémon) (W), Marr Bell (gorgon) (W), Jack Khajiit (bast) (W), Ace (satyr) (W), Ivan (zebra) (W), Aoi Myojin (bipedal wolf) (W), Slender Man (abomination) (D)
'Gate slam' transitions:
All Ponies (sans blank-flanks): Their cutie mark (or whatever stand-in for it)
Gilda: A brown feather from her plumage
Mobius: A silhouette of his head
Cutie Mark Crusaders: Their cape banner colored in their coat color
Rylan Watch: His shield with his sword behind it
Echo: A silhouette of his head
Griffin: The marking on his chest
Iron Will: A minotaur head
ATLAS and P-Body: The Aperture Science logo
Knightmare Demonbane: His guitar-axe
Discord: A glass of chocolate milk
Queen Chrysalis: A changeling's head
Arrell Ragnarok: A windigo head
Lucario: A Pokéball
Jack Khajiit: Atheris, his snake bracelet
Fluffle Puff: A miniature of herself
Ace: Turncoat, his dagger
Ivan: Malice (the Zebrican god of revenge), a spider with a top hat
Wonderbolts: Their logo on their suits
Mario Bros.: The decals on Mario's and Luigi's hats
Little Mac: His boxing gloves
Jake Gray: Dynamicorp's logo (while he's left it behind, I needed a symbol)
Aoi Myojin: Kokuryū no saishū-bin, his katana
Slender Man: his weakness, the Operator symbol
No updates there, but just in case I forget.
5563632 She wasn't showing mercy, just giving her a last request. And the "No Mercy" applies to the research; I may mess with it a bit for the sake of entertainment in the battle itself.
Sombra VS Dr. Facilier AKA the Shadow Man.
I will be waiting for more battles. I sure desided to read this thing late.
Detective Private Eye (Equestria Noir series) vs. Detective Hard Boiled (Starlight Over Detrot: A Noir Tale)
Good battle. I look forward to more.
Also, to suggest characters from other fanfic stories on this website, does the story have to be complete in order for the character to be eligible?
~ Super-Brony12
5779656 No, but I do expect it to have progressed enough that I can actually judge the character fairly. And I may have a "cutoff point" where I stop paying attention to information in chapters because of the story still being updated.
And don't suggest your own OCs.
5779682
Oh, you won't have to worry about me suggesting my own OCs. I don't even have any stories of own posted to draw contestants from.
Anyway though, here are a few suggestions from me:
1. Adrian Mandeville (Black Equinox) vs. Spike (The Dragon and the Force)
2. Twilight Sparkle (The Trials of a Necromantic Equestria) vs. Faith/Doubt ("Faith and Doubt" and "The Abundance")
3. Spider-Mane (Spiders and Magic: Rise of Spider-Mane) vs. Eclipse (We Fight As One)
4. Green Goblin (Spiders and Magic: Rise of Spider-Mane) vs. Tirek (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic)
5826226 Contrary to popular belief, love doesn't make you stronger. Not in this context, anyway. Big Mac was, as far as he knew, just going to find Cheerilee; if he knew she was being trapped or in danger, that's a different story, but it was very casual and he was skipping along like Pepe le Pew. So that was natural strength.
And the thing with the cake was because he was having trouble balancing it, not carrying it. That, and it was comedic effect.
Holy cow! I just noticed that both Yah-Shee and Arrell are a play on your name.
Caesars Legion (Fallout New Vega) vs Caribou (Fall of Equestria)
Or
The Caribou (Fall of Equestria) vs The Saints (Saints Row series)
I'm thinking of the Daemon K'banda vs Tirek.
... HOLY SHIT, that would be epic. But K'banda would crush Tirek.
5826331 unlass the cake have something in it to make it super harvy