Records of an Academy Disaster

by Fahrenheit

Day Two: Outsourcing

TWO DAYS UNTIL WING FLING

Comments

[Albi]

It's just a bomb waiting to explode.

[Blue_Paladin42]

5932164
It is, and if you REALLY concentrate, you can read it.
>:D

[horizon]

5932164 5932204
For some reason I didn't have much trouble with it, so here's a typed transcript. (It's not in the Transcripts chapter, so I'm putting it in spoilertext.)

The sky looked like Soarin tonight. Great swaths of baby blue and periwinkle stretched across the horizon, with hints of something deeper and more mysterious just barely peeking through the dark green shadows of the trees. My head still hurts from the minor concussion that unicorn gave me, and I can't remember what the filly who saved my life looked like.

I'm still so ashamed that we even needed to be saved. Three Wonderbolts, two of my officers in the R.E.A., and we still needed to be saved, like infants just barely learning that flapping isn't enough to fly.

I remember talking to the filly. her voice was adorably squeaky and rough on the edges, kind of like mine is after calling commands in the atmosphere for hours. But that's it. That's all I remember about her.

Crescent Moon told me she pulled off a Sonic Rainboom?!? AND I DIDN'T SEE IT! I'm more than slightly upset. I'm disappointed.

I don't know who she is, but I am going to find that filly again, and one day she'll be wearing blue, if I have
(ends mid-sentence)

[ThunderWonder]

Look, if she can find the badge for whatever rank she just made up, she can promote herself to Ultimate Equestrian Conqueror, for all I care.

th01.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/f/2013/348/d/2/rainbow_dash__whatsa_problem___by_erikngn-d6xyclg.png

Also: Spitfire doesn't have her stress meds? Uh-oh.

[Misplaced Mage]

Let's see:
• Training Instructor Wonderbolt (reserve) and fastest pegasus in modern history, Rainbow Dash, to run the reserves ragged? Check.
• Up-and-coming fashion designer and hall decorator, Rarity, given an unlimited budget? Check.
• Dessert chef, sugar addict, and Primo Party Planner Pony, Pinkie Pie, to… be Pinkie Pie? Check.
• Her Royal Highness, the Princess of Friendship, Multiple Time Savior of Equestria, Tirek's Bane, Redeemer & Friend of Princess Luna, Vanquisher & Friend of Discord, Bearer of the Element of Magic (ret.), Personal Protégée of Her Majesty Princess Celestia, Graduate of Princess Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns egregia cum laude, Archmage excelsior, Mother Sister Hatcher & Assistant to the Great & Honorable Spike the Brave & Glorious Champion of the Crystal Empire, and Liberator & Resident Librarian of the Town of Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle, to despell either highly classified ESS information or Spitfire's unenchanted diary? Check.
• Chief caterer and champion rodeo mare, Applejack, to provide even more raw ammunition? In progress.

All we need now is an excuse to force invite Fluttershy to attend, and the bomb will be fully fused and primed to detonate!

[garfan]

5932679

Fluttershy will arrive because Tank was lonely without Rainbow Dash

[Seether00]

Dead dead dead dead! That's what Fleet is by the end of this.

Hmmm... I wonder if Fleet could bring back Lightning Dust. Just for the heck of it or for more labor.

[Fahrenheit]

5932164
Yep yep; it is indeed about the Best Young Flyer's incident.

5932325
Yeah that's pretty much it. I'm impressed; I wrote it, and I still have difficulty making out the words.

[SuperPinkBrony12]

5932148 Just gotta wait for the power keg to ignite, then "Kaboom!"

[The Ponopticon]

5933603 As an English teacher, Spitfire's is definitely not the worst writing I've ever seen.

As an aside, I nearly wrote 'handwriting,' but that would clearly be inaccurate.

[Fahrenheit]

5950433 Bless your soul. You must've seen some terrible penmanship.

[Csquared08]

This is going to be very bad.

[nemryn]

HER ROYAL HIGHNESS (the small purple one)

[Kitcat36]

5950433
5951960
I really feel bad for you, Ponopticon That was hard enough to read. I'm still impressed I made it all out.

[Kitcat36]

5932325
Nicely done! But you might want to double check one thing--I'm pretty sure the word is "infants", not "infantry".

EDIT: Yes, I know the punctuation should be inside the quotation marks, but I always worry that when I'm quoting text with corrections that if I include the punctuation for the sentence describing the corrections inside the quotation marks I'll mess up the author ^^' It just occurred to me that I probably don't have to worry about that with you; you have a really good reputation as author and editor

[horizon]

5958197
Thanks! Fixed.

Don't worry about the quotes -- first of all, placing punctuation inside is a U.S. rule, not a universal one (though I fear the Internet age is making us universalize on U.S. convention), and secondly, as you point out, in a case like this it would have reduced clarity. As far as I'm concerned, formatting rules need to serve two purposes: 1) communicate intended meaning, and 2) be applied consistently. Given that you weren't quoting text which included a period, if anyone tried to go grammar nazi on you, your position's totally defensible. (And I have better things to do with my life than play grammar nazi, anyhow.)

Glad to know my reputation precedes me, though.

[Noctus Umbra]

Fleet! What the buck is your major malfunction? There is no way by the grace of the sun and moon that you're this stupid. Spit must talk shop with you seeing as you and Soarin are her oldest friends, so good stars how have you orchestrated such a fluster cluck?

[QueenMoriarty]

And in 3, 2, 1...

[IMFoalishFace]

*the small purple one

I've been laughing but that shit had me in tears, great story!

[Ryvaken]

I think I spent ten minutes sounding out that diary letter by letter. I didn't move on until I was satisfied I wasn't going to get any more out of it (and ready to murder whoever came up with cursive english writing). The next document threw me into hysterics in three seconds flat.

[Arnyx]

*Reads first image* *dies*

[forbloodysummer]

Airmare!

[The Weaver]

7492824
Now that i look at it (far more closely) it is cursive; my favorite way to write.

I can barely read the thing...

[SPANIARD KIWI]

5932325
God bless you!😀