The Guilt
It was a late, rainy night as a familiar blue unicorn mare stumbled down the Ponyville streets. This mare's name was Trixie Lulamoon and ever since the Alicorn Amulet incident some would think that everything turned out great for her but in reality, it only went downhill from there. Sure she was forgiven in Ponyville but everywhere else, she was loathed and disrespected by everyone she came across. She had treated the folks she met with respect and patience like she learned to do, but every time she did she would always be ridiculed and hated.
Now, a few years later she returned to Ponyville to repay the Princess of Friendship Twilight Sparkle a visit to tell her the problems she has encountered. Trixie wasn't only angry or jealous of the Alicorn but furious and vengeful to Twilight. Ever since she heard word that Twilight had become an Alicorn she has been loathing Twilight ever since. Why did Twilight become the Alicorn? Why does everything nice and great happen to the purple unicorn and not the blue one? Trixie has always had to work to the bone of her hands just to sleep in a bed, but that "Princess" Gets everything served to her on a silver platter. When was it Trixie's turn to be happy?
While Twilight earned wings and royal power, Trixie earned many bruises and wounds along with becoming a drunk, depressed, and having to sell her body for bits so she can afford to sleep under a roof. Her self rant and angry mumbles ceased when she came across Twilight's palace doors. Trixie glared at the large shiny doors, mocking her in their beauty. Trixie was once as beautiful, shiny, and new like the doors of Twilight's palace; but ever since she was released from the Alicorn Amulet nothing went right for her.
"Th-think you're better than Trixie? Think you-you're better than her? With y-your... Doors! And your pretty little crown and princess label! You don't know what it's like! She doesn't know what it's like! I know she doesn't know what it's like, that's why we're here!"
She raised her dirty blue hand and sloppily slammed on the large doors. Almost instantly she was met with a royal guard in purple and gold armor, with a spear to match the colors.
"State your business here citizen."
Trixie only glared at the stiff and serious stallion. She finally lifted her hand pointing to the sky.
"THE G-GREAT AND POW-POWERFUL TRI-TRIXIE DEMANDS TO SEE THE-THE BITCH WHO LIVES IN THIS GIANT T-TOY PALACE!"
"Ma'am I believe you are drunk, please return to your home." The guard replied sounding irritated now.
"TH-THE GREAT AND POW-POW-PO- TRIXIE WILL NOT BE SILENCED!" As Trixie and the guard continued their argument and rants Twilight has ventured to the door herself, being woken up by all the commotion.
"What's going on Private? Who's at the... Trixie?"
Trixie staggered in place as she took another drink from a glass bottle of vodka. After her long gulp she pointed with the hand that held the bottle and began her rant.
"You! Do y-you unders-stand what I wen't th-through? Just to sleep in a bed! You an-and I need t-to talk!"
Twilight only stared at the drunken mare, for reasons even she couldn't explain she let her in.
"Let her in Private."
~***~
Twilight and Trixie settled in a giant sitting room of the palace, the chairs were made from the finest leather Equestria had to offer. A chandelier hung from the ceiling lighting up the entire room, dark violet walls and dark oak wood floors built the room and made it more exquisite.
The two mares sat across from each other. Trixie was slumped on a velvet wood chair looking as if she were to fall asleep that moment. Twilight sat sophisticated and pridefully upon her modest but more grand chair. The room stayed silent and motionless until Twilight spoke up.
"So... How are things?" She obviously had nothing to say. Who would?
"You know damn well how "Things" are." Trixie replied with quotient fingers in the air.
"I don't think I know what you're talking about Trixie."
"Don't play stupid Sparkle! You know what you and your little friends did to me. I came to this town hoping for a good life, some fans, and adoring audience! All I did, was show off some tricks, and you and your friends couldn't handle that? Couldn't handle someone presenting themselves? Then later that day, you run me out of town for the ursa minor problem! Which might I add, was the making of those two retards Snips and Snails! Tell me how that's fair Sparkle!"
"You were showing off! You were flaunting your powers! Challenging others to make yourself seem more great and-" Twilight was cut off.
"What's wrong with doing that!? Everyone here in this little town you call your kingdom does the same! They lie about themselves to make themselves seem more amazing or more important. Last time I checked, your friend Rainbow Dash does the exact same thing. The only difference is she doesn't challenge others."
Twilight was speechless, as much as she didn't want to admit it Trixie was right. Rainbow had a tendency to over her stories; especially if they were about herself. Once again, an awkward silence fell over the two mares. Neither wanting to say anything to each other. Almost sounding like a murmur, her voice rose to a respectful volume.
"I have no where to sleep... I try my hardest not to sleep under a bridge. But now that I think about it, compared to the things I went through just to sleep in a bed... I would take a sleepless night under a bridge than do what I did."
"Don't you have your caravan?" Twilight asked sounding more concerned for the now hungover mare.
"Did, did is the key word Sparkle. A few weeks after I left Ponyville after the amulet event, some thugs found my home... And burned it down. Ever since then, I didn't have a roof over my head, a bed to sleep in, food to eat, water to drink and bathe in. I had nothing... Then I heard of you, becoming an Alicorn... See the difference between you and I Sparkle is that in the beginning you had everything served to you on a silver platter. See I saw your little, screw up at the magic tryouts. But Celestia took you, under her wing. Took you under her guidance! Leaving me! Leaving me to work my ass off just to earn a few bits to support myself!"
Anger filled Twilight as well.
"Are you saying that I didn't work hard to get where I am today!? I studied day and night, missed the opportunity to socialize with others! Besides, at least you were free to do what you want! I had to constantly study and work my way here!"
"SHUT UP! You shut up Sparkle! You can't even fathom the pain and sadness I had to go through! I went home that day to get beat by my parents! Lets go a few years later to when I was the performer you first knew me as! I was sometimes loved, sometimes loathed by most. But then you and your friends happened to me! I lost everything Sparkle! You think you had it hard? All you did was sit on your lazy ass and stare at words in a book! In a warm room with a loving family to help you get there! Lets go back to last year, I was homeless, living in Manehatten selling my body just to afford food and shelter! I worked as a pole dancer! I earned little to nothing Sparkle! Where were you meanwhile? Huh? Where were you? I think I know, reading your books in your warm home, with loving friends and family surrounding you!"
Trixie paused, wanting to say something else but hesitated. Finally after gathering up the bravery she continued.
"I once had to spend everything I had... Everything I earned to abort an unborn child. I had become pregnant Sparkle! Given my current situation I couldn't take care of the child. I had to let it go. I had to end an un-lived life. Where were you while I went through that? Where were you when I had to play god? Simply reading books, in a warm home, with family and friends surrounding you!"
Both Trixie and Twilgiht had tears going down their faces. Heavy breathing came from Trixie trying to recover from her rant. Twilight only looked at the ground, never making eye contact with the former showmare.
"Get out... Get out, get out, GET OUT, GET OUT, GET OUT!" Twilight shouted, still crying. Trixie back up a few steps in surprise and slight fear. Then a giant scowl grew on her face.
"Wow Sparkle, I thought you were the "Princess of Friendship" Guess I was wrong huh?" Trixie said smugly. After her taunt, she stormed towards the room's doors but stopped and glanced back to Sparkle.
"One day Twilight, one day you'll know what true pain feels like. What it feels like to be left alone, to lose all your friends. Mark my words Sparkle, while you're 1,000 years old but you still have some youth and all your friends are dead and gone... You will know, what true loneliness feels like."
She finally turned her head and walked out the room, closing the doors with her magic behind her. Twilight was experiencing a wave of different emotions. She was sad, angry, guilty, and confused. She didn't know what to do, she only stood in the middle of the room and stared at the closed oak wood doors. Suddenly, with anger taking over she screamed and kicked at a chair knocking it over.
Trixie who was only down the hall, was once again tearing up from the sound of the screaming Alicorn.
~***~
It was nearly sunrise when while Trixie stood on a near hill staring at Twilight's palace. She took a long drink of whisky this time as she continuously stared at the tree like castle. She stood near a tree, about 4 feet taller than herself. Her glance fell onto the branches of the tree she stood near, she stared at it for the longest time before using a simple conjuring spell. She dropped the empty whisky bottle to the ground and in her hands appeared a thick rope.
With her magic, she tied it into a noose and tying it to the tree. She used a levitation spell to reach the branch of the tree that the noose was tied to. She took the loop and slid it to her neck. Holding onto the branch, about to take the fall she began to mutter to herself,
"Merciful god in heaven, please forgive me for I have sinned. I do not deserve the luxury and graciousness of your kingdom lord father but please accept me into your arms as I commit to this act. I pray for those who go through the same as I, I pray for Twilight and her friends, please forgive them for their sins lord father and when their time comes, please accept them into your kingdom as well lord. As I commit to this act, please capture my soul and take me to the gates of heaven.
Amen"
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Sad, but great story. I have to admit I was praying Twilight would save her. You might want to add a tragedy tag though, unless somepony does end up saving Trixie.
I really think, she was just challenging them and they accepted, they lost against Trixie, and after that the Element´s of revenge wanted....well revenge. Okay it is not that bad, but even if she was not nice i think it was okay, because they accepted her challange.
5410850 Well yes, i didn´t needed a suicide Trixie in this one-shot, but i liked what is happen. A Tragedy warning would be nice that´s right, i can handle it, but i would still have avoided something like that, because i just don´t feel like reading a tragic story.
I couldn´t decide, but i guess i change my down vote into a up vote, because i somehow liked it, i actually only not like it, that Trixie had to die after she said something what i thought was right.
5413351 Look I would respect your critique and and I would understand it but the problem is that you're speaking gibberish. I don't understand your jumble of words.
5413382 which part do you not understand? it wasn´t the most complicated stuff i had written till now, but i know i have not the best grammar.
While i know some people who understand my more or less poor english (german), i try to make it simple, that way i can´t mess up that much with the grammar.
I didn´t liked it that Trixie had to die, but i like the story.
It is rare that i like one-shots, and normally i am not that fond of tragic stories.
I think Twilight Nigthmare is right and it maybe should have a tragedy tag, this way i could have choosen, if i wanted to read something like that.
I don´t know how it looks for people which have english as their main language, but i think i can only get the order of the words wrong. I don´t really know why it have to be gibberish, but maybe i am positiv and negative about the story again.
If could tell me what you didn´t understand it would be more helpfull, it always sounds a bit more nice than just saying it is bad.
5413472 I apologize, I didn't mean to offend you by not being able to understand your typing.
See coming from an American reader I didn't fully understand what you were trying to type. I kind of understood what you wanted to get across, I just couldn't piece together the words since they seemed misspelled or jumbled. Do you see what I mean?
But I do not see what you mean, the Tragedy icon is on the story main page. I added it when I got Twilight Nightmare's comment which I'm to assume he read before you did correct?
But from what you wrote, and I quote
you liked this story, but there were still aspects you didn't like correct? You didn't like the fact that Trixie "Killed herself" But see, many people fail to understand or possibly this is my fault for not being a better writer that I ended it off when Trixie ended her prayer, I never wrote about her actually committing the act. So in turn it leaves the reader to create his or her own ending.
I can't fav this story. I can't even like this story. You had me until Twilight threw Trixie out after she poured her heart out about having to abort a foal. I figured Twilight would have a little more compassion. Yes, Twilight has had to put her neck on the line many times to save the world. However, she never had to sell her body in order to live another day. Yes, Trixie showed up to Twilight's home to rant and make someone else miserable (misery loves company), but I think, deep down, she came there hoping to find someone who cared.
Now we come to the end. I have nothing against any religion nor those that don't believe in any. That said, I always thought of the 'God' of Equestria was female, Whether it be, Celestia, Faust, or the originator of 'My Little Pony'. Granted, we have no idea how religion works in the show (even if there is any at all). Honestly, I don't feel that this particular prayer fit in with that universe.
Now, as for readers picturing their own ending to this, unless a Dues Ex Machina of some type occurs, there is only one ending for Trixie.
5417219 Well I can understand that you don't agree with the prayer scene since most gods/goddesses on the Equestrian fan lore are either Celestia, Faust, or the original creator but I pictured an actual God. As in Christian god, now I'm not saying Christian god is an actual god and the others aren't I'm just saying that I kinda feel as if the Christianity religion has a more heartfelt prayer. You understand what I mean right?
But you know, this is all coming from a Christian writer, nowadays Christians can't even sneeze without having a problem with atheists or other activists.
Now discussing why Twilight rejected Trixie's plea or however you perceive it. I wanted a more realistic scenario. Now you might say.
"Oh, if it were a normal person or me I would let her stay with me in my place!"
Well, then what kinda story would that be? Now yes originally I was going to have Twilight have Trixie stay in the palace, but still have Trixie commit suicide.
Now going back to God being a girl or female in the Equestrian world. Well, how I perceive god is a gender less energy. Also you say Trixie never had to sell her body to live another day.
Tell me, who's writing the story? Who's lore is it? Who's the person behind the story line and the plot? Not to be rude but it's my story I'll have Trixie be a terrorist if I want to. I wanted to break away from the giant cliche that occurs in stories like this.
Trixie goes to Twilight and pours her soul out, Twilight lets Trixie stay, Trixie becomes a better pony then happily ever after. Well, I wanted to depict a darker more depressing version of the cliche. I wanted to step outside the box. I apologize if this reply seems most disrespectful but I'm going to defend a story that I worked hard on.
5417267
Like I said, I have no problem with religion. If this is how you wanted to portray it in your story, so be it. Secondly, I never said anything about Trixie not selling herself. I said, "Yes, Twilight has had to put her neck on the line many times to save the world. However, she never had to sell her body in order to live another day." I was talking about Twilight throughout these two sentences. You never said Twilight sold herself, so I didn't either. Third, like you said, this is your story. You wrote it because you wanted to write it. However, as with all stories by all authors, you are not going to please everyone. Everyone has different tastes and dislikes.
So, keep writing your stories. I wish you the best of luck. If you write another story that catches my interest, I will read it and comment on it. You are a good writer and the story is well-written, which is why I won't down vote this story either.
5418278 well I can't argue with that. And no like is better than a dislike so there's that.
First she didn't trust wheels, now its the doors.
Sequel please?
a short review of the story.
I think I like the story as much as "too late" by gutovi. the trixie in this story is just as tragic in rainbow dash from too late, the only difference are the scenarios.
I feel bad for trixie here,
yeah boath twilight's problems are understandable, but I hope it's safe to say that I think Trixie is a lot more understandable than twilight. twilight fought many villains of Equestria and was rewarded with a castle, while Trixie was trying to be an entertainer, to have some fans, but ends up getting treated like crap with no fault of her own even after the alicorn emulate incident. the scenario in this story is actually pretty accurate to the real world, that once you make a mistake no matter how bad it is, the world wants you to kill yourself, no redemption, no mercy, no nothing. and that is just tragic that the world can be that violent. 
and I say Trixie, is mutch more relatable than twilight (and yes I do find twilight relatable.)
as for the ending, I was not expecting that!
the suicide scene is also accurate, but I thought that maybe trixie would problebly move on with her life as a hermit and for her to live alone either on a beach, or to live happily with her new daughter to teacher not to fall under the same path she went through or all of the above, that is the ending I would look up to, and it would make a bitter sweet ending. but the suicide scene works too 
and accurate to suicide in real life.
I give it a 9/10, the realism is accurate, trixie's scenario is sympathetic and done very well, and I think anybody would like this story.