Chapter 9 - Breakfast and a Show
Rolling my eyes, I pick up a pillow and drop it on Lyra’s head. I rinse and repeat until Lyra eventually awakens. As she shakes her head I say, “Ah, ah, ah, you can’t get out of talking to me just by fainting.”
She looks at me, her eyes wide in fright, “Bu…But…But you’re not real! You were only a dream.”
Placing my hand on my chest and raising my chin, “Yes, I know I’m very dreamy. You flatter me Lyra.”
She continues to stare at me her mouth moving slightly but no words are emitted.
“That’s an excellent impersonation of a fish Lyra. Now do a bird.” I flop down horizontally, my stomach facing down with my hands under my chin.
“Ok, I’m still dreaming, that has to be it. There is no way in Tartarus there is a ghost floating around in my room.” Lyra places a hoof to her forehead and starts to message her temples.
“Well it’s either that or you’re going crazy. I doubt you’re going crazy though since the only crazy pony I hang out with is Pinkie.”
I hear a stirring from the side of the bed and Vinyl pops up with the worst bed head I’ve ever seen, “huh, did you say something Lyra?”
“Uhh, no it’s nothing, don’t worry about it. How about you wake Octavia up and I’ll fix us some breakfast?” She says, looking back and forth between Vinyl and me.
Vinyl immediately begins shaking Octavia while I put on my best pout, “I’m nothing? Oh, you wound me deep Lyra, you wound me deep.”
With one freshly awakened Octavia the three exit the bedroom and I follow closely behind. As we pass Bon Bon’s room I float through the door and I hear Lyra’s voice from behind me, “NO, don’t go in there!”
“I just have to use the bathroom Lyra. Don’t worry I won’t mess with any of your stuff.” I hear Vinyl say, causing me to snicker.
I float over to Bon Bon who still has large puffs of cotton stuffed in her ears. She’s snoring lightly with her left ear twitching every now and then. With a quiet D’aww, I grab ahold of the blanket and pull it off her, “Wakey Wakey, time for eggs and hay bakey.” I call in a sing song voice. Bon Bon simply rolls over as her bedroom door cracks open slightly to reveal a nervous looking Lyra.
“What are you doing?” She hisses at me.
“Well, I thought Bon Bon might like some breakfast too.”
She rolls her eyes and walks over to Bon Bon and gently shakes her with a hoof. After about a minute of shaking Bon Bon wakes with a jerk and then pulls the cotton from her ears, “What’s the matter Lyra, did you have a nightmare again?”
Lyra blushes furiously at this, “No that’s not it. I was just wondering if you wanted some breakfast.”
Bon Bon smiles and quickly gets up and follows Lyra downstairs. I float behind them and see Octavia has already gotten eggs, hay, vegetables and some cheese out and has begun creating delicious looking (except for the hay) omelets.
Lyra heats up a pan on the stove and pours some of the mixture in. I float over and whisper in her ear, “Those look very good Lyra, are you going to make me one too?” I say with my best puppy dog eyes. She just glares at me then goes back to flipping the omelets.
“Oh, so you’re going to ignore me now?”
She turns to me and whispers through her teeth, “Of course I’m going to ignore you, you don’t exist.”
“Are you ok over there Lyra?” Calls Octavia as she and Bon Bon finish placing four plates onto the table with matching glasses of orange juice.
“Yes, I’m just fine. Still a little tired I guess.” Lyra quickly responds as she flips a finished omelet onto one of the plates with a string of magic.
“Well we were up rather late last night. I really think we should have Vinyl record us sometime, we’re beginning to sound really good together.”
“That would be pretty awesome. Perhaps if we can scrape enough money together we can make some albums and see if anypony would be interested in buying them.” Replies Lyra as she flips another omelet over to the table.
Vinyl walks in, her bedhead having slightly been tamed and sits down at the table. “What’s this I hear about recording our stuff? It’s a great idea but I would need to get some equipment for that.”
“Well, if we can at least record a few of our songs and see what everypony thinks we might be able to get our names out there more.” Octavia says as Lyra finishes the last omelet and the four of them sit down at the table.
The four mares dig into the food with abandon and I begin giggling at the lack of table manners. Lyra glares daggers at me, if looks could kill and I wasn’t already dead I’m sure I would have been impaled.
Vinyl looks up from her morning meal and shivers slightly, “Is it just me or is it starting to get really chilly in here.”
Octavia shrugs her shoulders, “I guess so. It was kind of cold last night too, but autumn is just around the bend so we can expect some chilly nights.”
Bon Bon gets up to bring some salt and pepper to the table for her omelet, “That’s true but I did notice it got colder in here yesterday around midday.” She shrugs pouring salt onto her breakfast.
I raise my eyebrows while looking at Lyra, “See, even your friends can tell that I’m around.”
She merely scowls at this and turns back to her own meal that had hardly been touched.
With a mouthful of eggs Vinyl says, “Hey Lyra, can you pass me the salt please.”
Before Lyra has a chance to respond, I reach out and slide the salt from Bon Bon’s end of the table to just in front of Vinyl. Vinyl’s eyes grow wide, “Sweet Celestia Lyra, I didn’t know you learned how to hide your magic aura. That’s really advanced magic right there.” She says as she pours a liberal amount of sodium chloride onto her eggs.
Lyra’s eye twitches and it looks like a few beads of sweat have appeared, “uhhh, yeah I…I asked Twilight to teach me how so I can play the Lyre without anypony seeing my magic.”
Huh, good cover there girl. I think I might have to kick my game up a notch.
“You know Lyra, if you’re not going to at least admit that I’m real, I’m going to have to start playing hardball.”
She glances at me, a look of confusion on her face.
“Well, I don’t ever run out of breath, I have a whole collection of showtunes in my repertoire and absolutely nothing better to do then try and get you to talk to me, sooo…”
I take a stance behind Lyra, taking a deep breath before going into my stunning performance, “OoOoOklahoma, where the wind comes sweeping down the plain, where the waiving wheat can sure smell sweat when the wind comes right behind the rain….”
Lyra’s face has taken on a look of horror as I continue my rendition. Normally I have a semi decent singing voice but I have a rather decent control over my vocals. So of course I sing as off key as I can.
The breakfast continues on with the girls having a pleasant conversation about the weather, the upcoming Nightmare Night and the possibility of the three of them putting together a recording. During this whole encounter I watched as Lyra slowly slipped from her horrified expression into extreme annoyance. I could tell from the eye twitches.
By the time the dishes are being cleaned I have gone through all the songs from Oklahoma, some good old Cole Porter songs and I had decided to move onto some Monty Python.
“I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts, standing in a row. Big ones, small ones, some as big as yer HEAD. Give it a twist, a flick of the wrist. That’s what the showman said…”
“GAHH!” an exasperated Lyra plops herself down in front of the sink as she puts the last dish into the drying rack.
“Are you ok in there?” asks a concerned Bon Bon as she walks in from her bedroom where she had put on what appears to be a white apron with pink frills that says ‘Never trust a skinny cook’.
“Yeah I’m fine. I just have a bit of a headache… I think I’m going to go for a walk to see if some fresh air will help.” Lyra starts trotting towards the front door. “Have fun at work, and can you let Vinyl and Octavia know that I will see them later.”
“Sure thing, I hope you feel better.”
Following behind as Lyra exits into the morning light that is bathing Ponyville in its glow, I have continued with some more Monty Python songs, “Ohhh, I’m a lumberjack and I’m ok. I sleep all night and I work all day…”
Lyra is doing a surprisingly good job of ignoring me as she trots through town. Eventually I see a very recognizable tree coming around a corner and before I know it we’re in front of Twilight’s Library.
As Lyra walks in I’ve stopped singing. This is going to either be very interesting or terrifying. Probably both. I float in as Lyra is looking through what I’ve identified as the fiction section of the library. Of course this is the smallest section in the library as Twilight prefers to stock up on educational texts of science and magic. I still find it hilarious that the magic books are stocked under the non-fiction section.
“Oh Lyra, I haven’t seen you in a while. Is there anything I can help you with?” I hear Twilight say. I turn around to see Twilight descending her stairs with a brush being held by a violet strand of purple magic running through her mane.
Lyra turns around from her perusing, “Umm, yeah. Do you have any books on Gho…I mean do you have any books on something called a human?”
With a thoughtful look on her face Twilight approaches the bookshelf, “Hmm, I don’t think I have ever heard of anything called a human. Could you give me something more to go on?”
Lyra glances over at me, “I think their usually rather tall, about six feet or so. I believe they stand on their back legs with a similar body structure to that of a diamond dog I guess…Actually, I would say they are closer to that of a Minotaur I guess.”
“Hmm, that does ring a bell. Let me see.” Twilight begins to pull books off the shelves, flipping through them rapidly before carefully placing them back into their respective places. Eventually, Twilight pulls out a positively ancient book, flipping through it until she stops about halfway through the book.
I look over her shoulder to see a rough drawing of a human. The guy in the drawing was wearing a long toga and looked either Greek or a frat boy after a party.
Twilight began to read aloud the small block of text next to the picture, “Humans; a mythical race said to be tall bipedal creatures. Ancient legends state they lived alongside all three of the pony tribes before the founding of Equestria. Their ability to adapt to different situations and their versatility made them powerful allies. There have been no known reports of Humans being more then legend and all information about them has been established as myth and folklore.”
“HA, that’s hilarious. You guys are legends in my world and it turns out I’m a legend in your world.”
Lyra looks at me and I can see her mouthing the word ‘world’ with a look of deep thought.
Twilight is currently studying the picture intently. “Huh, this creature kind of looks familiar…If you take away the clothes and you just look at the outline it would kind of look like the gho…” She abruptly stops and looks nervously at Lyra. “So Lyra, is there a particular reason why you have a sudden interest in mythological creatures.”
Lyra begins rubbing her hooves together nervously, “Uhh, you see…I kind of…had a dream last night and I think there was a human in it.”
“Do you know why you might have had a dream about an obscure mythological creature?”
I interject here, “Yes Lyra, please tell us why you were having a dream about a devilishly handsome human.”
Lyra glances at me and then back to Twilight. She takes in a deep breath and then lets it out slowly, “Twilight…Do you believe in ghosts?”
Twilight looks stunned for a second, “I really don’t know how to say this, but with everything that has happened in the last two months I am going to have to say yes I do believe in ghosts.”
“Well…I believe in ghosts too.”
I do a fist pump, “Yes, acknowledged. Score one for Spooky.”
Lyra looks over at me, “I also believe that ghosts can be very annoying.”
“Oh, am I annoying you right now. I could go back to the singing if you would like?” I ask innocently.
“Oh dear Celestia no, anything but the singing.”
Twilight looks incredibly confused for a second before looking in the direction that Lyra was talking to, more specifically at me. She turns back to Lyra, “Do you care to elaborate on that?”
Lyra look back to Twilight and then back to the ground, “After I woke up from my dream this morning, I found out that Spooky wasn’t really just a dream and he was actually floating in my room.”
Twilight looked ecstatic at this piece of information, “You mean you can actually see him? This is amazing, we can learn so much about him. Wait…is he really called Spooky?”
“I don’t think that’s his real name but he seems to like it.”
“What’s not to like about a name given by Ponyville’s Party Pony.” I state while I float over to some books spread out on the table. I flip over one of the covers and begin reading.
Twilight looks over at the book and then back to Lyra with a gigantic smile on her face, “This can speed up my research by MONTHS.” She begins to advance on Lyra and I see the maniac grin filling her face.
I decide that now would be a good time to warn her, “Lyra, when Twilight gets that look in her eye, you might want to consider running.”
At this Lyra turns tail and sprints towards the door but a long string of purple magic hits the door before she can even get halfway there and there is an audible click as the door locks.
“Ah, ah, ah, I have soooo many questions.” Says miss Maniac Sparkle as she catches up to Lyra.
Lyra looks pleadingly over at me, “Can’t you do something about this?”
“Well, I could float through the wall and leave, but I seriously doubt me not being here would stem the flow of questions that are about to come. Besides, I would never leave you like that, if you have to suffer through this then so will I.”
Lyra looks slightly touched at this, but that is soon replaced in horror as Twilight brings a stack of parchment and a quill over from the table and begins to ask her questions.
…Four hours…Four fricken hours… How can one pony ask so many questions about such stupid things? Our little talk with Twilight had begun productively enough, with Lyra acting as a translator between me and Twilight. Of course she left out my rather colorful language that I used to answer most of Twilight’s questions but she got the gist of everything.
Twilight’s questions had started off rather logical, asking about what it was like being a ghost and all that. I gave her the best answers I could, but she probably knew more about this stuff then I did. We eventually got to the whole being human thing. It was hilarious that she originally thought that I was a thousand year old ghost of a race that had died out long ago but correcting her by telling her I was actually recently dead and from an entirely different world was probably a mistake. She went off on that for about two hours, asking about earth and humans in general. I answered her questions as best I could but she kept getting off on weird tangents when she would find similarities between humans and ponies.
I had started to wonder if the torture would ever stop, I could probably go on for the rest of the day but poor Lyra was looking pretty exhausted by this point.
Fortunately, Sparkle’s interrogation is brought to a halt by a soft knocking on the front door. Twilight quickly unlocks the door and I see my favorite yellow and pink Pegasus standing at the door, “Oh…H-hi Twilight. I brought that book back that I had borrowed. “ She says as she quietly walks into the room, pulling a book from her saddlebag.
I turn to Lyra, “Hug Fluttershy!”
“What? I’m not going to hug Fluttershy.”
“Listen, that Pegasus deserves the biggest hug in the history of Equestria from me so get over there and hug her.”
“I don’t really feel comfortable doing this.”
“I can’t very well do it so you are going to have to be my proxy. Now get over there and hug that adorable bundle of Pegasus until she squeaks.” I demand.
Lyra sighs and slowly walks over to Fluttershy, who looks very confused right now. Lyra wraps her hooves around Shy and pulls her into a deep hug. “Umm. Lyra, n-not that I don’t enjoy hugs, but w-why are you hugging me?”
Lyra blushes and pulls back, “Uh, Spooky asked me too. He said something about owing you a hug.”
“Spooky?”
Twilight pulls Fluttershy off to the side and begins to explaining everything to her.
I float over to Lyra and look down at her, “Thank you Lyra.”
“Uh, you’re welcome Spooky.”
“Did you just say SPOOKY?” We look up to the door to see a frazzled and out of breath Pinkie Pie.
“Uh, yeah.”
“You mean you can actually talk to him? Oh my GOSH! This is fantastic; we can finally talk to Spooky. This means we can finally find out all about him. Oh boy!” She pops up into the air and gasps, “This means I can finally throw him a PARTY!” She immediately disappears out the door leaving behind a Pinkie shaped cloud of dust.
I blink a few times and look down to Lyra, “Well…This is going to be interesting.”
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....... Lyra isnt gonna make it through this with her sanity in tact is she?
I love this story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
...Poor Lyra.
Sppoky, I know it hurts like hell but you're gonna have to pay Twilight and Pinkie a dream visit just to save Lyra's sanity.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Oh my god you made me laugh so hard... Just start belting out showtunes!
Oh god... I'm still laughing.
I'm surprised that he didn't decide to sing "This is the song that never ends".
Seriously, that works every time.
570812 He can't just use his secret weapon right from the get go.
He should have sung Every Sperm is Precious!
That one is epic!
Hahaha another great chapter, however I sense either pinkie's party ends in disaster/hilarity or we have some Celestia agro in the near future.
Spooky is best ghost
570821
But resistance is futile.
They may last a little longer, but they break even worse when they do.
But I see your point.
Does he know any bawdy drinking songs or sea shanties?
Nightmare Mode: Have him sing "The Good Ship Venus"
Yes! Updates! I have to say this is probably my favorite story that I have ever read. Keep this going stong.
Btw I think Lyra will be locked in Twi's library until all of Twi's questions are answered and that Pinkie will make a magnificent party but will be disapointed when she learns that he cant eat/enjoy her sweets. I also wonder if Spooky will do the dream walk again so he can have more people to talk to/annoy/drive to insanity.
Good chapter.
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Epic ghostness
“That’s true but I did notice it got colder in here yesterday around midday.” She shrugs pouring salt onto her breakfast.”
“Hay Lyra, can you pass me the salt please.”
1. Extra caption at the end.
2. Hey.
Yay! Spooky got his A game on! Poor Lyra... TWILIGHT Y U SO MEAN
This story is a really fun read keep it up!
570664 1% chance that she will live without going crazy dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra.png
wow spooky is kinda being a dick but i just hope lyra is okay
I love the way you're talking, pranking, and being an all-around smartass with Lyra; gets at my personal sense of humor.
How to throw a party for a ghost?
... a question for the ages.
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I could not stop laughing,I'm loving this story!! :D
I can't.. HAHAHA.... stop... Laughing! OmglolzHahaha... Lyra is in toruble.
Why did you made your story so good? WHY?! Hahaha!
570664
Her sanity is low. She should probably stay out of the dark!.
lyra sees dead people... well just one but, ISNT THAT ENOUGH!?
Well Lyra...
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Now he reminds me of Discord
4113484 This, times ten.
Now create a host body for him so that he can possess it and physically live with them.
1450549 Bam! +1 Reference point!
570692 Where would the fun in that be? As much as I love Lyra, annoying the crap outta her is waaaaaay too much fun!
4113484 This is a good thing.
I think you mean "sweet".
Loving this story, by the way.
2Spooky4Me
Lyra as played by Whoopi.
Instead of I take a stance behind Lyra it should be I take a shit behind Lyra