• Member Since 9th Jan, 2014
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Brightlight24


Quite frankly, I'm a simple person who enjoys watching the show from time to time, and an avid reader/writer.

Comments ( 134 )

Yay first comment anyways this looks good i going to read it

Great so far

I already feel sorry for him. Mainly because of the snobs he will encounter.

This is really kind of you, thank you for writing this on your own accord. *hugs*

I can't wait for more!:pinkiehappy:

I'm liking this so far. good job!

I wanna know~!
Can you show me~!

short chapter, liked it though. looking forward to it





stay classy:moustache:

Rick's too much of a Fluttershy clone right now for me to like him, but I'll keep reading.

This is the only chapter that you are going to put it like a journey or all the story will be like that?

Brightlight24, normally I am not very threatening, but if this story is not continued for at least five more chapters I WILL find you. That is not a threat, it is a promise.

5283395
"I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. What I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you write five more chapters, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you."
"Good luck."

An interesting perspective. I think I'll enjoy this story. Keep up the good work.

Hmmmm... the social anxiety route eh? This served as a good intro chapter, though I'm sure the entire story won't take place in a journalistic point of view. Either way, I like what I see.

You have my attention, and I await more.

I am interged I shall follow for now and see what happens next.

5284736 "Interged" I think you mean intrigued. :moustache:

5286444 yes indeed thatscwhat I meant

5286701 "thatscwhat" Don't you mean.....
No... must... resist... the Urge! Must... not... become... a Grammar Nazi!

Ah, who am I kidding? Father was and English Professor with a PhD and my brother is a English Major. :pinkiecrazy:

It is "that's what," or "that is what."

Heil! Grammar! :moustache:

5286758

Father was and English Teacher

Grammar Nazi

Oh the irony. XD

5286758 you sound like one of my friends she's a grammar nazi as well but the truth is
I am a bad speller.

Thumbed, favorited and followed. I want to see where this goes. :twilightsmile:

About the only thing that stands out is some of the wording. Twelve minutes seems oddly specific, for example, and a lot of the narrative is worded curiously given that it's being written in a journal. Mostly stuttering, pauses, that sort of thing. They work for the spoken word, as though he were using a Quick-Quotes Quill (TM). In a journal, that hesitance to write should

No, that's not right, how do I

Might look better expressed through cutoff statements, possibly strike-through used to good effect, like you used at the end.

Ultimately it comes down to styling and personal preferences, and as the author of a story that carries great promise, you should decide what looks best to you. :pinkiehappy:

Good. One of my concers is what, twilight buying him a house? That's crazy. Souls maybe be some explanation of that here, or in the future. Like it was abandoned or condemed, or celestia told her to. Otherwise, I'm interested and looking forward to more!

i dont care for grammar all Nazis must die ill be there lead because i dont use grammar this what i look like when im happy

s2.quickmeme.com/img/3b/3b6ceec525559d91f62918118b15e4c84c361fdc8ae4cdb7af7f7de07491cc25.jpg

My name is rick...and I would eat this man alive and screaming.

Interesting... I like it. :moustache:

Alright, we'll bite.
Kinda odd he totally skipped the whole shebang of being confused and lost in a whole new world, but I figure we can fill in the blanks easily enough.
Keep going! ;)

Eh, this character was definitely made in the extreme. I'm sure this was on purpose, but I just can't relate to this character. He's so far to that end of the spectrum that I'm having a bit of a hard time suspending my disbelief while reading. Not badly written over-all, just not my cup of tea I suppose. I wish you the best! :D

Too… many… ellipses… to… continue… reading. Seriously, simplify your sentences, keep them short and sweet, and end them with a period. Makes for a much better read. :twilightsmile:

5281768 If someone were to make a music video involving Rick and Celestia to this song, I would probably have a heart attack

It's good, but need moreeee.

I just want to grab him by the shoulders and scream
"stop being such a cowered!"

*sigh*
to think that this is there first impression of humanity.

and that he has my name...

HMB
HMB #35 · Dec 16th, 2014 · · · -2- ·

5390235 Except you'll say coward the correct way, and not freak to dude out hopefully?

JBL

Tried to read this, but ellipses galore forced me to stop.

i want moew

*bear hugs* bright, I can't tell you how much this means to me... Thank you so much...

>tfw my name is rick
I..I don't stutter t-that much..dawg. I'm not a chinese cartoon.
Interesting though, I'll give you that, I honestly haven't read very many stories where the main character is sort of meek and nervous instead of yeah bruh ima get dat horse pussi.

Really liking this story so far, I hope to see more of it soon.

Keep up the good work!

As good as it is, a bit too obvious, Celestia being the on he asked to put in a good word.
Then again, none of the other princesses could have been used to the same level of effect.
...
Meeting Blueblood should be interesting though.

5531849 That's a strange way to spell 'Abusing.'

5531892 Abusing Blueblood seems to be one of FimFiction's favorite passtimes. I know I'm turning him into a hero in one of my stories, after he gets punted out of reality and is forced to work with a team of humans I'm developing.
Neural implants, maybe going completely Cyborg, and getting the sense beaten into him by 6 or seven teenagers without a F*** to give.
Besides, who doesn't want to shoot a Unicorn at a demon? It's like... I dunno, something funny.

5531901 Actually, for this I'd expect Blueblood to be 100% indifferent. Disinterested even.
And it is that disinterest, I would find interesting.

Blueblood would have no grounds to claim superiority, as being the ONLY human would make him an ambassador, and grant diplomatic immunity, so ordering the guards is out, so the only bloodless option left is complete ignorance.
...
I'd outright say, "I give him five minutes before he fucks up," and when he does, go into the 'now you fucked up' rant.

Why do I had this mental image of 'And then Ricky black out on a heart attack' he was ready to pass out from the voice alone, to essentially just realised he yell at the princess, would be enough to be just to much for him.

Also if he was so nervous and all that, wouldn't that mean that by this point he had sweat so much that its looks like he took a dip on a pool with all and his cloths? oh boy lets hope no mare kiss his check or anything because of how salt our sweat is and how little resistance they had to salt, they will get drunk on an instant

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