Coming Attractions

by Rouis

Chapter Nine: Mystery Pony Theater 3000

Coming Attractions
A MLP:FIM Fic
By Rouis & GaintGamer

Chapter Nine: Mystery Pony Theater 3000

Hoofington was a usually quiet town today however; was a different situation entirely. The town had just undergone the process of ridding itself of a certain infestation of hungry insects known as parasprites. The little gifts from tartarus had taken quite the toll on the town, and as such ponies scurried about repairing various damages to the towns foodstores. So it was nothing but absolute perfect timing for the caravan to roll up.

Long Haul slowed his gait as he brought the caravan to a halt just inside the town gates. Hoofington seemed like a less densely constructed version of Trottingham to him. Houses, buildings, and other structures had some space apart from each other as opposed to being conjoined at the sides. After unhitching himself from the harness of the caravan he found quite the peculiar scene on the inside.

“Are we there yet?” Lemon Drop shouted at a reading Silver Screen.

Silver Screen threw his hooves up in frustration, and returned verbal fire. “For the last time I don’t know, and don’t make me politely ask Long Haul to consider turning this caravan around!”

Long Haul cantered up in between the feuding ponies to break things up. “That’s enough children, and Lemon Drop we are infact here.”

“Finally!” Lemon Drop cheered at the prospect of being able to explore the town she had not visited since she was small. The yellow mare moved to head out into the town when a voice stopped her.

“Hold it missy, where do you think your going?” Silver Screen asked.

“To fun, and merriment of course!” Lemon Drop tried to innocently answer.

“If by fun and or merriment you mean work and or labor then yes!” Long Haul chipped in.

“He’s right you know. You are an official employee of the Coming Attractions traveling theater, and that means helping set up for our next performance.” Silver Screen said while looking to his saddlebags which sat against the side of his bed. He levitated a scroll out and set it at Lemon Drop’s hooves. “I’ll need to set up the screen for today’s performance, and do a practice run of tonight’s presentation. While I’m doing this you and Long Haul are going to go into town and procure everything on that list.” He explained.

“Fun, and merriment commence afterwards?” Lemon Drop asked hopefully.

Once again it was up to Long Haul to be the spoiler of hopes and dreams. “Nope! Then you go into town and advertise the performance!” He and Silver Screen grinned trying to cheer up the now disappointed mare that sat before them. Long Haul thought about the situation for a moment before he relented. “I guess there’s no reason that we all can’t go have fun after the performance?” He asked the group before him.

Lemon Drop perked up immediately at the mention of something not involving work. “Well what are we waiting for then! To market!” She then nudged Long Haul out the door, and followed suit.

Silver Screen stood in the caravan and blinked. “They left me already with a broken door, set up duties, and one hell of an inferiority complex. Awww.” He whined before picking up the remains of the door, and started on his work.

< Hoofington Town Center >

Long Haul did his best to keep up with the happy bouncing mare in front of him. He had barely put on his Eiffel tower embroidered saddlebags before he was shoved out the door by Lemon Drop. Long Haul called ahead to the happy yellow unicorn. “So Miss I have fancy magic, and can easily look at a scroll while walking easier than the pony whose special talent is picking things up, and putting them down.”

Lemon Drop got the hint quickly, and levitated the scroll out of her own saddlebags. She made a confused expression at the jotted down items Silver Screen required. “Does your friend have any sane level of measurements? He asked for three barrels of fruit punch, and a giant pile of corn.”

He contemplated the strange amounts for a minute before nodding his head in acceptance. “Nope, that pretty much sounds like something that he would write down. We better get to finding something close to that anyway.”

The two made their way further into town, and eventually they made their way into the market. Just like in Trottingham ponies were everywhere making their daily purchases. It seemed even though the parasprites had eaten half of the towns food, the ponies of Hoofington would make it even though everything was now about twice the normal price.

Long Haul trotted over to a vintner’s stand, and tapped the ring for service bell with a forehoof. He watched as a dark purple earth pony with a light blue mane came out from behind a group of barrels, and trotted over to the side of the counter opposite from Long Haul.

The pony cleared his throat before introducing himself to the new customer. “Good afternoon sir, I am Vintage Cask the owner of this stall. May I be of service to you today?”

“This may be something you don’t normally get but would you happen to have three barrels of punch?” Long Haul nervously asked.

Vintage Cask’s eyes went wide with delight at the large order. “I do not, but I could make that for you in three hours, and I’ll even have it delivered to wherever you need it! How does one hundred and thirty bits sound? I’ll even throw in cups!”

Long Haul’s eyes glinted at the opportunity to haggle a price down. Time to lay on the tourist act! He thought to himself before putting his plan into action. “I don’t know I mean I probably should shop around a little since I’m not from here.”

The shop owner quickly fell for the lure and lowered his price to secure the new customer. “One hundred bits?”

Long Haul let out a fake sigh. “I don’t know I’m just so confused by my new surroundings. I feel so insecure I may just go back home, not spend any bits at all. Why won’t somepony just shut up and take my money?”

Cask grew frantic at the thought of losing a sale, and hastily made his last offer. “Seventy-five bits!” The stallion yelled in desperation.

“You have yourself a deal, and you’ll find a caravan parked just inside the town’s main gate that is where I need them delivered.” Long Haul said as he motioned Lemon Drop to come over. “Drop if you would please present this fine gentlecolt with seventy-five bits. I’m going to go to purchase some produce.”

Lemon Drop watched her boss head over to a produce stand, and levitated the necessary bits out of her saddlebags onto the counter. “Thank you!” She said before she trotted off to see who Long Haul was now haggling with.

Long Haul approached the section of the market that dealt with all things grown. He noticed that unlike the previous row of the market, this one was much more somber.

Ponies sat trying to sell the little produce that was left from the pesky parasprite pandemonium. “My cabbages!” Shouted a green pony running the local cabbage stall whose entire stock was left in shreds. Further down the lined up stalls sat a shopfront shaped like a giant ear of corn, and this was Long Haul’s next destination.

Yet again he was able to get the shopkeeper to lower their prices just a bit, and score another free delivery back to the caravan. “Hey Lemon Drop, I’m going to go get the rest of the items on the list. I need you to go around, and advertise tonight's performance okay?” Rather than waiting for Lemon Drop to give him an answer he simply went off to finish his purchases.

Lemon Drop sat on her haunches blinking in confusion at her orders. “How the hay am I supposed to get ponies to come to a performance?” She asked herself. Lemon Drop looked around the market before she attempted her first advertisement pitch. “Anybody want to come watch my boss shoot moving pictures out of his head?” She asked the ponies that passed her by, most of them looked at her like she was insane. That's it! Now it’s a challenge. If my dad can do this whole public speaking thing then so can I. She thought as she prepared herself for the next attempt. “Ponies of Hoofington if I could have your attention for a moment. Clearly this town has experienced trials, and tribulations as of late. Why sit around moping? You should be enjoying life! So why not come to the Coming Attractions traveling theater this evening where for a small fee you could enjoy a method of entertainment unlike anything Equestria has seen thus far!” Her attempts at gaining the crowds interest however; did not go swimmingly as planned.

The ponies of the market still either outright ignored her, or made judgemental comments regarding the outsider’s chipper manner. Lemon Drop grew frustrated at an alarming rate, and she was ready to pack it in for the day. That was when a familiar hoof tapped on her shoulder. She looked up from her own aggravation to see Long Haul smiling at her. “What’s so funny? I stink at this.” She grumbled.

The taller pony chuckled a little before offering some advice. “It’s not what’s funny. It’s about how you’re going about this. They don’t want to be told what they should do. It’s about letting ponies know what you can do for them.” He nodded as if to give her the go ahead.

Lemon Drop thought about his advice for a moment, and tried her best to put it to use. “Hey everypony! One night only we are offering you an opportunity to see the stuff of your dreams come true! Come this evening to the Coming Attractions traveling theater where for a small price you too could go on an amazing journey without ever leaving town!” Lemon Drop watched as ponies stopped to listen to her speak about the theater. She could tell that she had them eating out of her hoof, and she would just need to finish her speech with enough gusto to ensure that everypony listening would drop by the caravan that night. “And because the farmers of this town have taken such a hard hit from the parasprite infestation half of tonight’s admission will be donated to the families who were impacted!”

On her last line the ponies of Hoofington broke out into a cheer. Several ponies stopped to ask Lemon Drop for directions to the theater which she happily gave, and once the crowds had died down she turned to Long Haul. “So how did I do?” She asked while beaming with pride in herself.

Long Haul who had been standing there wide eyed since she promised half their admissions snapped out of his shock, and looked at the prideful mare. “You did good, but then again you also promised half of our profits to the town. I just hope your little gambit works, or we may be cutting back on eating expenses completely.” Long Haul watching in his mind as his fabled haycakes slipped from his grasp and flew away. “I guess we should get back, and see what Silver Screen is up to then.” He said as the two went to head back to the caravan.

< Meanwhile back at the Coming Attractions caravan >

Silver Screen thanked the ponies who had just dropped off the supplies for the shows, and opened up one of the two crates of corn that had been delivered. Silver used his magic to float some of the corn over a kettle that he had prepared during the set up that morning. He used a chef’s knife to cut the kernels off the corn letting them fall into the kettle once separate from cobb. Once he had done this enough to fill a quarter of the kettle he noticed Lemon Drop skipping towards the caravan with Long Haul in tow. “Well I see how the shopping went, but should we be ready for some actual crowds?” He asked the two returning ponies.

“I think it went awesomely!” Lemon Drop chirped as she looked into the kettle Silver Screen had been adding to.

“Awesome, especially the part where she promised half our admissions to charity” Long Haul grumbled as he joined the ecstatic mare in looking at the kettle. “What are you cooking up exactly? Because if this is what I think it is: Then you’re crazier than I thought.” He said.

“Of course it is!” Silver excitedly answered. “There are two things that make a theater successful: good product, and concessions. So I need to make sure that we have both good product showing, and of course concessions. So if we make a profit off of selling food at the shows, then I don’t see a problem donating some of the profit.” He explained while nodding his head furiously at his plan.

Long Haul gulped at the thought of Silver Screen’s little experiment in cooking, but swallowed his fears for the sake of progress, and possible haycakes that may come in his future. “So how exactly are you going to make it?” Long Haul asked as he took a few hoofsteps away from the kettle.

Lemon Drop nodded her head to Long Haul’s question. “I’m curious on that too!”

Silver Screen pointed his horn at the kettle, and explained his plan. “To be honest, I was just going to zap it with magic. I figured the worst thing that could happen is that I accidentaly summon the Krakken or something.”

Long Haul’s face grew pale at the thought of unintended magical consequences. “What if you give life to a giant mutant corn monster that you can’t hit because it keeps diving underground, and every time you hit it just moves faster!” His face then resumed its normal composure, and he gave some cautionary advice. “Nah, seriously though I don’t want to see anypony get blown up. Please be careful where you're sticking that thing.”

Lemon Drop shuffled away from the kettle, and looked at the ready to fire Silver Screen. She hid herself behind Long Haul, and shouted at her other boss. “I don’t want to die Silver Screen!”

“If you two like safe magic so much, why don’t you both marry it!” Silver shouted as he concentrated on the bottom of the kettle. A green beam shot from his horn to the kettle causing the bottom of the kettle to turn red from the heat being applied. “I think it’s working!” He shouted before resuming concentration. With a small pop the corn began blow piece by piece, and eventually the kettle was overflowing with magic popped popcorn. Silver cut off the flow of magic to the kettle, and looked at his result. The green coated unicorn let a victorious smirk cross his face as he levitated a few pieces out of the kettle letting them hover in front of Long Haul, and Lemon Drop. “Well? Tell me what you think!” Silver demanded.

Long Haul stuck his tongue out, and tasted a piece of the popcorn before letting himself consume that which hovered in front of him. The earth pony swallowed his sample, and smiled. “It’s actually not that bad. Congratulations buddy you did great, and you didn’t even mess up and summon a corn based horror.” He said to the now beaming Silver Screen.

After she had seen that Long Haul did not immediately drop dead from Silver’s magic based corn product she let herself taste her sample. “You’re right it is good!” She commented before she grabbed a few more pieces from the kettle, and tried to begin snacking.

The corn however was snatched from her mid-air by Silver Screen. “Okay that’s enough sampling for now, we need to get ready for the show tonight!”

Lemon Drop gave a defeated sigh. “Fine, and what will I be doing per-say?” She asked.

Long Haul looked at her for a second, and came up with an idea. “Well since Silver Screen is pretty much out of commision during the show, and I will be collecting admission while acting as the master of ceremonies. You my dear will be stationed at concessions, and provide the snackage.”

With that said the three ponies went to make the final preparations before they were ready for the attendees to start showing up. Slowly but surely ponies started to show up to the caravan with bits ready to be spent.

Long Haul collected admission from everypony who showed up at the gate, and made sure to let each guest know about the new concession stand located in front of the caravan. “Thank you, and enjoy the show tonight.” He remarked to a pair of purple ponies who immediately made their way towards the snack line where Lemon Drop was doing her best to stay ahead of the customer orders.

Once the crowd had finished entering, Long Haul stopped by the impromptu concession stand, where Lemon Drop was giving the last call on food before it was showtime. “How did it go over here?” Long Haul asked the now exhausted mare.

Lemon Drop looked up from her empty table. There was a bit of punch in her mane, and she seemed completely exhausted, but instead of complaining about the amount of business she simply smiled. “It went great actually. I had a rough start, but I got the hang of it after a few orders.”

The crimson earth pony smiled back at his employee, and he then tapped her on the head with a hoof. “You did good Drop, and as a reward for all your work today I think Silver, and I can take it from here. Why don’t you just sit back, and enjoy the show.” He said before he went over to the caravans entrance and peeked inside. “Hey Silver Screen are you ready?” He asked.

Silver Screen who was sitting on his bed turned to look at Long Haul, and replied. “Just a moment! Why don’t you go make the introductions?” He said before turning back to his current distraction: An open book in front of him.

Long Haul sighed at his occupied friend. “Fine, but you better get out there soon!” He chided, and headed off to welcome the crowd. He trotted over to stand in front of the large sheet which acted as their impromptu screen, and began his speech. “Fillies and Gentlecolts of Hoofington if I could have your attention for just a moment. On behalf of the Coming Attractions traveling theater I would like to welcome you to our first road performance. I would also like to thank everyone for attending tonight because the rumors are true. We will be giving half of tonight’s attendance to the families affected by the parasprites!”

The crowd went wild at the reminder of the promised donation. Ponies stomped their hooves in approval until the large crimson pony raised a hoof to continue his opening speech. As he spoke Silver Screen moved through the crowd, and sat down behind the crowd.

Long Haul took note of Silver’s readiness, and went to end the introduction. “Without any further interruption I would like to present: Fetlock Holmes.” Long Haul ducked out of the way of the screen as his friend’s spell hit the surface, and the performance began. I think I’ll sit this one out. He thought to himself as he ascended the steps that led inside of the caravan.

Lemon Drop sat watching the performance from just outside of the caravan. She always enjoyed watching Silver’s strange way of storytelling, and the crowd seemed to be enjoying itself equally as much as she did. It was one pony in particular however; that brought her mind out of the show, and back to reality. This pony moved back through the audience almost gliding through the preoccupied ponies. The pony’s form mostly hidden from view by a tattered gray cloak, but there was one feature Lemon Drop recognized. Two ice blue eyes seethed from underneath the cloak, two eyes that she remembered looking back at her from her foalhood. “Mom?” She asked herself before noticing that the familiar shape was headed towards the spell-incapacitated Silver Screen. Lemon Drop quickly moved around the crowd, and placed herself between the intruder and her boss. She narrowed her eyes, and simply gave one command to the mare who had raised her. “Leave now.”

The pony laughed at her command. “I’ll go for now, but you can never escape me.” The cloaked pony rasped, and then glared at her for a moment before it simply walked away leaving a bewildered Lemon Drop blinking in confusion.

“That was it?” She asked herself just as she felt a hoof tap her on the back. She turned to see a worried Long Haul.

“What was all that about?” He asked while glancing at the parting figure.

Lemon Drop weighed her options at this point. If I tell him my mom was here, they could think she’s following them for me, and they might not let me travel with them anymore. “Oh it was just somepony who was too tired to stay for the end of the show.” She felt horrible for lying to one of the ponies who had let her join them on the road so easily.

Long Haul simply thought about her explanation for a moment. “Ah, well I guess this is one of Silver Screen’s longer shows.” He rationalized as the crowd exploded into a flurry of hoofstomping

The performance had ended, and with that Silver Screen sat up from his seated position to notice his friends were chatting away next to him. “Oh hey did I miss anything important?” He asked.

Lemon Drop quickly took initiative to steer the conversation away from what had just unfolded a moment ago. “Not really, though by the sound of it everypony really like it!”

Silver Screen looked around at the dissipating audience. Once every few moments a pony would come up to thank them for the opportunity to attend, and just like everyone else they left immediately after. After Long Haul presented the mayor of town with the promised donation for that night another pony trotted up the the trio of traveling performers.

This pony had a beige suit covering his brown coat, and a cutie mark consisting of three cards in a ball of fire. “Evening ponies the name is Aces High, owner of the Celestia’s Palace casino in Las Haygas. I have a very interesting proposition for you.” Said the tycoon who had introduced himself to everypony.

Silver Screen and Long Haul looked at each other in confusion for a moment before Long Haul looked back to Aces High. “What exactly would this proposition be?” He asked while trying to get a judge of character from the casino owner.

Aces High laughed for a moment before launching himself into an explanation. “I pride myself in having the absolute peak in Equestrian entertainment, and what you three put on tonight was certainly the first time I’ve witnessed,” The wealthy stallion paused for a moment while trying to think of a way to phrase what he had seen. “What do you call this?” He asked while gesturing from Silver’s horn to the screen.

“Cinema.” Silver Screen answered.

Aces High nodded his head to the green unicorn’s answer. “Right cinema. If you would be willing I would like for you all to come to Las Haygas, and put on a show like you did tonight. Who knows? Maybe if it goes well enough I could offer you a more permanent position if you get my drift there?”

“We’ll do it!” Long Haul immediately shouted with stars in his eyes.

“Perfect, I’ll be seeing you soon then, and I’ll go ahead and make the preparations for you. So just worry about getting there, and putting on one heck of a show.” With that said the suited pony left leaving the trio to ponder what was to come.

Silver Screen scraped a hoof across the ground nervously. “Are you sure we should have accepted that deal so quickly?” He asked.

“Yeah I mean my dad said nothing good comes that easily.” Lemon Drop added.

Long Haul looked up at the moon, and tried to ease their worries. “He offered us a gig with the potential of more to come I call that worth it, and besides: How hard could it be to get to Las Haygas?”

Comments

[The Checked King]

Umm at the part where Lemon Drop was out of snacks you called her Lemon Tree.
Was that intentional, a mistake or am I loosing my mind and seeing things?

[musicluvr1974]

Silver Screen scraped a hoof across the ground nervously. “Are you sure we should have accepted that deal so quickly?” He asked.
“Yeah I mean my dad said nothing good comes that easily.” Lemon Drop added.
Long Haul looked up at the moon, and tried to ease their worries. “He offered us a gig with the potential of more to come I call that worth it, and besides: How hard could it be to get to Las Haygas?”

He did not just say that, did he?! Now the Equestrian law of physics known to the wider multiverse as "irony" is going to be gunning for them specifically... You might just as well have painted a bulls-eye on the top of your caravan, Long Haul!

Seriously, though: great story thus far.

Onward!