Chapter 1
It had been thirty moons since Sunset Shimmer had fallen out of Celestia's grace and jumped through the mirror portal. Not from lack of searching, Celestia had failed to find a replacement to Sunset Shimmer as her personal apprentice, and Luna's return from the moon would only be a few years later. Celestia had spent the last thirty moons thinking about what to say to her former student to patch up their differences. But in reality, Celestia was unsure her former student would even return.
The precious mirror and portal was guarded day in and day out while it was open. It had already been open for a full day, and still nothing happened. All of the sudden, the mirror illuminated the entire room, and a pony tumbled across the floor and collided with some cushions strategically placed on the other side of the room. Two guards ran over to Sunset.
Sunset opened her eyes even though they were both still swirling around inside her skull. After closing her eyes, shaking her head vigorously and opening her eyes again, she was able to focus on the two guards towering over her. She clenched her teeth in anticipation of what would happen next. She knew that Celestia had banished her from the castle, a banishment that she was in violation of. She wondered if she was about to be detained and imprisoned like Celestia's student before her.
"Sunset Shimmer, please follow us. Princess Celestia has been expecting you."
Sunset gulped, and stood up. After standing up, Sunset followed one of the guards with her head drooped down low. The other guard walked behind her. After a few minutes of walking in the familiar castle hallways, Sunset guessed correctly that they were headed towards the throne room.
The door opened and Sunset looked into the familiar room. The first thing she saw was not Celestia, but rather, a clown dressed in silly clothing juggling bowling pins in the very center of the room. After a few moments, Sunset adjusted her gaze upwards to reveal Celestia sitting on her elevated throne. A dull look, glazed over look appeared on Celestia's face as she stared blankly at her gesture. Sunset walked closer and recognized the all too familiar look of Celestia bored stiff.
As Sunset stepped closer, Celestia's ears flinched. Celestia snapped out of here boredom trance and saw Sunset standing in front of her. Celestia gasped and smiled, having one of the most excited looks Sunset has ever seen on Celestia's face. Celestia immediately dashed towards Sunset and embraced her former student.
"Sunset! I'm so happy you came back!" Celestia said, while still embracing Sunset.
Sunset was relieved that she wouldn't be thrown into the dungeon for violating her banishment terms, and she welcomed the embrace. Sunset hadn't so much as received a single hug during her thirty months in the other world, and she wasn't about to end it now. "I'm so sorry princess!" Sunset blurted out, tears started streaming from her eyes.
Still embracing her former student, Celestia opened her eyes and gave a quick flick of her head. The guards received the message loud and clear, and cleared the room. After a few seconds, the doors slammed shut, leaving Sunset and Celestia alone.
"I'm so sorry for breaking into the library! I'm sorry for reading all those books I shouldn't have touched! And I'm so, so sorry for demanding to be a princess! I don't know what I was thinking, I'm sorry!" Sunset's speech became broken as she started crying more and more.
"Shhh, it's alright. Everythings going to be alright." Celestia continued the prolonged embrace and patted Sunset on the back slowly. After a few more seconds, Celestia ceased her embrace and took a step back. The two ponies were now sitting on the floor facing each other.
Sunset took the moment of silence as an opportunity to stop crying. She wiped the tears from her face with one of her forehooves. "I really am sorry for all the things I said and did, princess."
"I know you are, Sunset." Celestia replied.
"I have a question to ask." Sunset said. "Would you...would you consider taking me back as your student? I...I know I've made mistakes in the past, but I've learned a lot in these past thirty moons." Sunset's heart was racing,, as she would learn of her entire fate in the next few seconds.
Celestia let her breath out slowly. She had fully anticipated Sunset's question, and had already prepared an answer. "I'm very sorry, Sunset, but I'm afraid you're time as my student is over. I'm sure you understand that not everyone is meant to become a princess. I would, however, like to be your friend from this point forward." Celestia said slowly and carefully.
Sunset's heart sank into her chest. As much as she tried to hide her discomfort, disappointment, heartache, and sorrow, Celestia could still see it. Sunset took a moment before replying. "I...I understand, princess. Thank you."
Celestia smiled, surprised that Sunset took the bad news so well. "You are very welcome, my dear Sunset. I know you must be dissapointed, but do not fret. I will personally make sure everything works out for you."
Sunset was still disappointed at her shattered prospects of becoming a princess, but at least she knew that everything was going to be alright. Celestia had always meant the world to her, and it felt great being on her good side once again. The two ponies talked for hours. Talking about the good times of the past, but mostly avoiding Sunset's time in the other world. Each time Celestia would ask about anything within the last thirty moons, Sunset would avoid the question or change the subject.
Celestia gave out a yawn, as it was well past her normal bedtime. "We can continue talking tomorrow. Come, I had your old room prepared, just in case you decided to come back. I'm so glad that you did!" Celestia stood up and gave Sunset a short hug.
Sunset paused for a moment. "Actually...would it be okay if..."
"Yes?" Asked Celestia.
"I've had a very rough time in the other world for these past 30 moons. Could I maybe sleep with you, just for tonight?" Sunset asked.
Celestia was stunned by the question. Over the millennia,, there were a handful of disrespectful ponies who dared ask a similar question to her in various courts, but this was the first time in over a thousand years she had ever heard the question seriously asked. She paused for a moment to think. "Alright, Sunset. You may sleep with me, but just for tonight. Alright?"
Sunset nodded and smiled in response. The two ponies got up and walked side by side. Celestia was leading her down hallways Sunset had never been in before. Sunset had always been curious about what Celestia's quarters must've looked like. As the two ponies were walking, Sunset looked up towards her former mentor.
"What will it be like?" Sunset asked.
"Hmm?" Celestia looked down towards Sunset. "What do you mean?"
"I've never slept with anypony before. What will it be like?" Sunset said.
"Not even your parents?" Celestia asked.
Sunset looked down at the floor.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot." Celestia said, realizing she had accidentally touched an old nerve of her former student. "For you, I suppose it'll be like sleeping by a large, heated, breathing pillow." Celestia smiled.
Before Sunset could reply, the ponies arrived at a set of doors at the end of the torch lit hallway. Celestia used her magic to open the doors, revealing her quarters to Sunset. The room was very nice by any standard, but it wasn't as ornate as Sunset had always envisioned it. The ponies walked into the room, and Celestia used her magic to remove her crown, golden shoes and chestpiece.
Sunset took a moment to gaze up at the princess, who was now bare. Sunset never thought about it before, but she had never seen Celestia without her royal decorations. Celestia laid down on a large purple bedding on the floor, and patted a spot right next to her. Sunset got the message, and walked over to the bed. She proceeded to lay down next to Celestia.
Celestia draped one of her fore hooves and legs over Sunset, in a gentle embrace, and it wasn't too long before the two ponies were asleep.
Even during sleep, Sunset’s mind was restless, replaying all the events of today, and wondering about what her future would hold. The portal would only be open for another day, and the decision to stay in Equestria, or return to her newer home weighed heavily on her. Sunset awoke during the middle of the night.
Sunset wondered why half of her face was wet, and it wasn’t long before another glob of saliva splashed down onto her cheek. Without hesitating another second, Sunset slowly got out of the bed, being careful not to awaken Celestia. Sunset used her horn to dimly light up the room. Sunset knew she wouldn’t be able to go back to bed right away, so she decided a little exploring couldn’t hurt.
Celestia’s quarters was comprised of several rooms, and the one that caught Sunset’s attention appeared to be a study. She couldn’t believe she was standing in Celestia’s personal little library. These must be very special books indeed! Sunset used her magic to levitate one of the books over to a desk stacked with papers.
The desk was large, and a huge pile of papers on the desk. Sunset briefly looked at a few of the papers, all of them labeled at the top, “Form 1040, Schedule D.” Sunset knew that was probably the last thing she ever wanted to read. Her attention refocused on the random book she just pulled off of a shelf labeled ‘favorites’. She opened it and started reading the first chapter.
“Als glückliche Bestimmung gilt es mir heute, daß das Schicksal mir zum Geburtsort gerade Braunau am Inn zuwies.”
Sunset scratched her head. She didn’t know what it meant, but it reminded her of a human language. “I guess Celestia has spent some time on Earth after all.” Sunset muttered to herself. She put the book back where it was and examined the shelves more closely to determine which book to pull out next.
And there she saw it. “Diary, A.L. 990.” Sunset’s jaw dropped, as she contemplated what sort of information could be in this book. This was the year Sunset was banished, it would surely have an entry on that terrible night. Sunset levitated the book and put it down onto the desk. She opened it to the first entry.
“Dear diary, today, I saw a Zebra in the my great city. I must have a talk soon with the captain of the guard to see what can be done to prevent these creatures from entering the city.”
Sunset flipped ahead a few pages. “Dear diary, it seems that Sunset is having more trouble making friends than I thought. I paid a group of her classmates handsomely to befriend her, last week, and all of them have now returned the bits. Her magical abilities outclass any other unicorn I know, but even I must admit she can be insufferable at times.”
Sunset paused for a moment to absorb what she had just read. Sunset began to wonder if Celestia like her for who she was, or just for her magical ability. She flipped to another page. “Dear diary, Sunset is continuing to obsess about the portal. I am nearing my wit’s end. If Sunset cannot get past her obsession, I will have no choice but to expel her as my student and banish her from the castle. I can only hope she doesn’t commit suicide like her predecessors.”
Sunset couldn’t believe what she was reading! Celestia had always told her that she was Celestia’s first apprentice. Was her entire study a lie? She continued to read.
“Dear diary, tonight, I caught Sunset in the dark magic section of the library. She came across the alicorn transformation spell, and demanded to be a princess. What’s worse, she said that she would be even greater than I. Impossible, her coat isn’t even white. I had no choice but to expel her and banish her from the castle. She didn’t take the news too well, poor thing. She jumped into the portal as the guards were escorting her from the castle. In a way, I’m relieved that she’s finally gone. Perhaps one day she will come back and earn her redemption. But I will never allow her to become my student again.”
Sunset was furious. There was no way she was going to stick around in Equestria now. She left the diary open to the current page so Celestia would understand why Sunset was gone. Leaving unannounced wouldn't be enough, and Sunset began plotting how to best leave her mark.
A few hours later, Celestia awoke to raise the sun. After wiping the sleep out of her eyes, she realized something wasn't quite right. She couldn't immediately place why she felt that way, but a few moments later she realized that Sunset was no longer in the bed. In fact, Sunset didn't seem to be anywhere in the room! Celestia wondered where Sunset could have went.
Perhaps she went for a walk, or maybe she just got up to relieve herself, Celestia thought. Not a moment later, eyes darted to the furniture that normally holds her crown, chestpiece and hoof pieces. All her royal items were gone! "Oh no..." Celestia said to herself. Celestia immediately dashed to the room with the mirror portal.
She opened to the door to the room, and she was met with nothing but horror. The mirror lay shattered on the floor. Scorch marks were everywhere on the walls floor and ceiling of the room. Celestia quickly searched the room, but didn't find any trace of Sunset or her royal ornaments.
Celestia realized what had happened. She realized Sunset must've used one of the many time-delayed spells she taught her student. Sunset must have leaped into the portal moments before it was destroyed. Celestia knew that she had no way to reconstruct the portal. Both Sunset and her royal ornaments were gone forever, and there was nothing that Celestia could do about it. Even though no one was in hearing range, Celestia yelled in anger, "That little bitch!"
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Charliebbarkin · 4.5k words · 44 17 · 4k views
Stats
Page generated in 0.097 seconds
Total duration
916 users online
1,372,431 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
eh... I dunno seems like a awful LOT for Sunset to go though just to steal Celestia's regalia because it MIGHT be magical, and I have a feeling it isn't, pretending to have changed then blowing up the portal? Seems like a plan she didn't think through.
Great story, very touching
Well... until the end anyway.
I honestly fail to see the comedy in it. The way I read it was a mare who came back and apologized to her mentor, only to backstab her once again, which is in no way funny...
5173443 I think just the same. And it doesn't really seem like a good plan anyway. If she wants to be a princess, why return to the human world? She could've killed Celestia in her sleep and proclamed herself a princess, then be overthrowned by the upcoming Nighmare Moon and blah blah blah...
I guess maybe it wasn't clear from the story, but what Sunset did was her backup plan in case Celestia refused to accept her as a student again. Sunset didn't want this outcome, but it was plan B if all else failed.
After going back and reading it.. Yea I think I clearly missed where there was even at attempt at humor or how feigning sincerity and regret so you can steal jewelry from someone who trusted you is touching.
5175469 I think the very last part is funny
If there was a 'heartwarming' tag, I'd use it, but Comedy and Slice of Life is the closest I could find.
Sunset's motivations are left open to interpretation on purpose, but I feel that Sunset was sincerely regretful and apologetic, and still Celestia didn't take her back. Had Celestia accepted Sunset back as her student, none of this would have happened.
...ending ruins it.
5177585 Definitely, it had me up until that point.
5175503 Well, I can also think of that as the case, I would have liked to have thought that this was the case.
5173260 At least, she could get some money this way
5173721 If I were to give an honest review on what you did wrong, I'd say that people didn't find the ending funny because the beginning was too convincing. You had people honestly thinking this was a redemption story, only to throw all of it under the bus with the out of nowhere ending mood killer. This is a form of mood whiplash, and not one of the good types. If you don't get it here
Its worse with a character like Sunset who just had a redemption arc in canon. Maybe if you had a middle part where Sunset seriously contemplates stealing her stuff. This would make it apparent that this wasn't her first intentional coarse of action, but rather an impulse after being denied. As you have it now it looks like this was her intention from the start and everything before was a lie.
Also the fact that Celestia was out of character.
Keep in mind that I'm not an official reviewer or anything, This is just my two cents
5180850 Okay, thanks. I hadn't heard of mood whiplash before. Maybe if I would have foreshadowed what sunset was doing, or showed her doing it rather than it being a surprise, that would get rid of the mood whiplash. I think I'll also write a short epilogue to show what Sunset does with her....items.
5181544 Those ideas would indeed help some.
Obvious trollfic is obvious.
5185111 It's not a trollfic, you jerk. I'm in the process of updating it to make her motivations more clear, but I'm not done yet. And besides...Sunset has a canon history of doing this sort of thing. How'd you like it if I called your stories trollfics?
5185143 If this wasn't intended as a trollfic, I'm honestly surprised. I had wondered why a story that seemed to be so heartfelt and touching was getting so many downvotes until I saw that ending. Hell, I was prepared to defend this story and compliment it despite it being relatively sloppy on the writing end of thing...until that ending.
Because that's a trollfic ending, and there's no possible way you can justify it.
Alright, I have improved the story :) Hopefully it'll stop getting so many down votes now.
5186935 Maybe you could add a part where Celestia sees the passage of the book that Sunset purposely left open?
I can see why some would not like this fic, Celestia was way OOC, but I think that's what makes it funny. It starts out like a typical Sunset apologizes fic, then WHAM sudden story sucker punch!
Don't worry about the many downside votes, if you like your story and some people like it also, then that should be proof enough that it's not a bad one. I can understand that the ending is probably the reason of the many downside votes, but I also think that everyone would react different to it. I for example, had 3 different reactions:
there are not many stories I've seen where they make her OOC so every story is a whole new point of view. 
1) I was surprised and a little mad that it didn't turn out fully to be a redemption story, so I re-read to see if I had missed something.
2) I couldn't help but crack a smile at the thought of Sunset planning out in the blur of the moment what to do to leave a mark. (second time I re-read the story)
3) I'm laughing at this point at Celestia's reaction as while it IS way OOC, it makes it funny!
In overall, I like the story a lot. You got a vote in favor an a place in my favorites. I'll probably be returning to this story frequently.
8120518 Thanks much! I'm glad you liked the story :)
I have to say, while I am disappointed with this Celestia, I am much happier with this ending.
Now that?
That i can understand Happening
sunset is silent
Also she is really not doing well