Chapter 7
Chapter 7
For several hours after the school field trip, the draconequus statue continued to crack until, late that afternoon, it finally shattered and released the mismatched creature within. “Surprise!” he shouted as he leaped into the air, threw out his arms laughed. Then he saw that he was completely alone, and his expression turned dour. “Well I must say, this is just disappointing,” he said. His face twisted even further in displeasure as he took in his surroundings. “They stuck me in the gardens? Seriously? That just reeks of hubris. I really should give those princesses a good talking to. Or am I not one to talk?”
“Stop where you are!”
The creature turned calmly toward the voice and found himself looking at a pair of ponies—a pegasus and a unicorn, both stark white and wearing heavy plate armor. “Can I help you gentlecolts?” he asked politely.
“You are trespassing on royal property,” the unicorn said in an authoritative tone. “You will come with us immediately.”
The seemingly unreal being just laughed and began to float away, but the guards leaped around him to block his way again. The unicorn's horn began to glow with his own signature blue magic and the pegasus floated several feet off the ground, his wings spread in a way to make him look bigger. The creature's expression changed from amusement to mildly irritated boredom. “Yes, yes, you are a most intimidating pair of red shirts,” the draconequus said in a long suffering tone. “But I really do have things to do and ponies to see. So scram.” The guards refused to move and the creature rolled his eyes. “Oh, put those away before you hurt yourselves.” He snapped the birdlike claws of his left hand, and with a flash, the unicorn's horn and the pegasus's wings vanished, depositing the pegasus face first in the grass. The two guards gave each other a worried look before turning and glaring at the thing in front of them.
The creature chuckled and shrugged. “Sorry, fellas. I'm in a bit of a foul mood this afternoon. Untold time turned to stone would do that to anybody.” He lowered itself to the ground, the sound of his feet hitting the ground sounding like a loud "quack", and he began to pace around, each step making an increasingly ridiculous and impossible noise. “After all, I've been left here, on public display, for school foals to gawk at and birds to... well the less said about that the better. But these princesses of yours. I'm their arch enemy. Is it too much to ask they greet my return with their armies ready for a gruesome battle to the death? Or maybe a pie eating contest. I haven't decided which would be more entertaining. What do you two think? Aw who am I kidding? No one cares what you think. But I digress.”
With another flash, the draconequus suddenly appeared between the two guards, arms wrapped around their shoulders in a strangely friendly manner. “I do suppose it's terribly unfair of me to take out my frustrations on the two of you. After all, I was imprisoned during your great-great-great-many-times-great grandfathers' time. It's not like it's your fault, right?” He rose back into the air and began to chomp on a stick of cotton candy he was suddenly holding. “So I'm going to cut the two of you some slack. Go away now and I won't bother you two specifically anymore. I'll even give you a five minute head start so you can warn your princesses I'm coming, and I'm going to vent my bad mood on them. Just tell Celestia that Discord says 'hi'. She'll know who I am.”
One of the guards mustered up his courage to ask, “And if we choose instead to stay and fight you?”
Discord took another bite of his candy before responding. “Oh, well, that would be a commendable choice. Very brave. Heroic even. After all, I did just remove your wings and your horn with but a snap of my fingers. Why, just imagine what I could do if I really tried!” The tone of Discord's voice never varied off of friendly conversation, and even now his face held a happy, almost dopey smile. Somehow this made his threat even more sinister, and after a brief glance at each other, the two guards decided it best to exercise the better part of valor and make sure the princesses were warned of the coming danger. Around yet more of his cotton candy, Discord said, “Smart ponies.”
After a moment of thinking and eating, Discord tossed his cotton candy into the air and, after a snap of his fingers, watched as the ball of pink fluff separated into innumerable pieces, which grew into clouds, then flew off in all directions. It was a small gesture—mostly just saying 'hello' to the land he'd been gone from for so long. Still, between the chocolate, cola, coffee, tomato soup, and just plain normal rain, there would be a lot of general confusion and chaos from just the one stunt. After waiting another few moments, he summoned a pocket watch and checked how long he'd been waiting. The answer was thirty seconds. “Oh, well,” he said, tossing the watch over his shoulder, where it somehow exploded backwards—the cloud starting large and shrinking down to nothing. “What good is being able to make the rules if you can't break 'em?”
Another snap of his fingers, and Discord now held a one bit coin. “Now, which one of my little princesses am I going to visit first?” An expert flip sent the coin flying into the air, and less then a second later, he had the coin balanced on the back of his lion paw and was grinning madly. “Oh, this is going to be fun.” A flash of light later, and Discord was gone.
~FIM~
Discord reappeared in a surprisingly small, darkened room, the walls covered with star charts, drawings, and paintings. The large, ornate bed by the far wall was currently occupied by a soundly sleeping, and very familiar, midnight blue alicorn. At the sight of her, Discord's face twisted in a cruel smile. “Aw, isn't she just the cutest thing? “Wakey wakey, widdle Woona.” With a snap of his fingers, Luna's bed vanished, dumping her unceremoniously on the ground.
Luna's eyes immediately popped open and darted around in surprise and confusion, until they locked onto Discord. She leaped to her hooves, glared at the intruder, and her horn lit up with her magic's signature cobalt blue. “DISCORD!” she shouted, The Voice fully active.
Discord showed just as little concern over the powerful princess in front of him as he did the two guards earlier. “Aw, my Loony Little Luna, is that any way to greet an old friend?”
“THOU ART NO FRIEND OF OURS!”
Discord covered his chest with one hand in feigned pain. “Oh, you wound me. After all the time we spent together—all those games we played.”
Luna's eyes narrowed. “GAMES? 'TWAS A WAR!”
Discord shrugged. “Eh, to-may-to to-mah-to. But you've not exactly been a good little girl yourself, have you?”
Her eyes widened. “How would thou know such things?”
Discord smirked. “Give me some credit at least. I'm more powerful than you and your sister combined. Do you really think being turned to stone would keep me out of the loop entirely? I also know, for example, that the two of you are no longer bound to the Elements of Harmony, so there's really nothing you can do to me, now is there?”
Discord teleported next to Luna and draped an arm around her shoulders. “But enough about me, let's talk about you, you bad, bad girl. I must say I'm quite impressed. Endless night? Something of an amateur plot, honestly, but very nice for a first attempt. You have all the makings of a great chaos-bringer.”
“THOU HAST NO RIGHT TO JUDGE US!” Luna wrested herself free from Discord, spun to face him and let loose a terrible bolt of magic, which he was no longer there to take, and which blasted a hole through the wall of her room.
“Hmmm...I suppose not.” Discord was now hovering above Luna, reclining as if laying on a hammock, a bored expression on his face. “But what about your precious subjects? Do they have the right?” Suddenly, Luna's bed chambers seemed to melt away, leaving the two age-old enemies in a black void. But they were not alone. They were surrounded by ponies, many of which were staring at Luna in abject fear. Others, mostly of the so-called noble class, were jeering in her direction, whispering unflattering comparisons between her and her sister. Most hurtfully, a large portion of ponies were simply ignoring her, acting as if she didn't even exist.
“Things haven't changed for you in these last thousand years,” Discord said, a hypnotic tone to his voice. “You're still the second string sister. Still lord over a time most ponies sleep right through, and many openly fear. You will never be as loved as Celestia, though you will always wish it. Whether it's today or a hundred years from now, you will snap again. It's really only a matter of time.”
Discord was beginning to get to Luna, but she was too familiar with his methods to allow herself to be taken in that easily. “Thou thinkest thou knows us so well, does thou?”
“I 'knowest' I do, Little Luna. We've been at this little game of ours for so long, I know everything of any value about you.”
“LUNA!”
The shout interrupted Discord's spell, and Luna's room popped back into focus as Sugar Heart came skidding to a stop at the doorway. “I heard you screaming with The Voice and then there was an explosion or something and what the hay is that!?”
Discord was notably unimpressed by the new arrival. “And just who is this little peon?”
Luna placed herself protectively between the two of them. “THOU WILT NOT HARM EVEN A HAIR IN HER MANE IF THOU KNOWS WHAT IS GOOD FOR THEE!”
Discord had to admit he was rather taken aback by his Loony Little Luna's sudden change in demeanor. Did he miss something somewhere? Still, he grinned. “And even if I wanted to do something as boring as torment a little servant pony, who'd stop me? You?”
Luna's eyes began to glow the cold color of moonlight. “SUGAR HEART, RUN!” she instructed as she charged at Discord. She fired off another white hot bolt from her horn, which uselessly burned another hole in the wall. Anticipating Discord's move, Luna bucked both hind legs behind her, catching only air, but the popping sound let her know her instincts were correct. Instantly she retaliated by flaring her wings in a devastating slicing motion, and she smirked as she made contact with Discord's face.
Discord rubbed his nose with a mildly irritated look on his face. “That actually stung a bit.” His face lit up into a smile a moment later. “Ah, there she is. I was wondering what was keeping her.”
Luna turned to see Celestia and several guards, including Captain of the Guard Shining Armor, charging down the hallway in a battle formation. They were unable to react when a red, semi-transparent wall appeared directly in front of them. The wall briefly gave to the force of the ponies ramming into it, before bouncing them all back on their flanks.
Discord laughed. “I was hoping to pit you two against each other in a nasty little civil war, but I suppose Plan B will have to do.” He snapped his talons and launched a small blue light in Luna's direction. She dodged the perceived attack, but became confused when it spread out in a perfect oval of light upon hitting the wall behind her.
“What art thou...?”
“Ah, ah. Wait for it.” Discord said as he snapped his lion claws, producing another light—this one orange—which he sent flying out the window. “Trust me, it's going to be hilarious.”
Luna didn't have time to make a retort as the oval behind her suddenly opened like a doorway and began drawing her to it with an immense force of suction. “WHAT DID THOU DO!?” Luna cried as she tried in vain to fight against the increasingly powerful vacuum.
“You'll see,” was her reply, as Luna finally lost her hoofing and flew backwards into the oval doorway. Discord by this point was doubled over in laughter and didn't notice the green blur dive from behind Luna's reading couch and into the portal before he snapped his fingers again and caused it to vanish.
Discord casually leaned up against the pliant red wall separating him from all the other ponies and smiled congenially. “Why hello, Celestia. It really has been too long.”
“What did you do to her?” Princess Celestia said, with a deadly calm in her voice.
“Sorry, what was that? You'll have to speak up. The gelatin wall muffles sound a bit.”
“MY SISTER!” Celestia's rare display of anger brought with it an equally rare demonstration of The Voice. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY SISTER!?”
“Oh, that. Don't you worry your pretty little head about your pwecious widdle Woona.” Discord grinned. “I didn't do anything to her you didn't do first.”
Celestia's eyes widened in horror for a brief moment, then narrowed to dangerous slits. “You didn't,” she said, a steel to her voice that could cut down the oldest tree in Everfree.
“Oh, Celestia, Celestia, Celestia. My dear sweet Celestia. Remember who you're talking to. Of course I did.”
~FIM~
Luna groaned as she got to her hooves. When she opened her eyes to take in her surroundings, they widened and her pupils shrank to a pair of desperate little dots. The sky above was black, the ground was gray and featureless. There was nothing living, plant or animal, as far as the eye could see. “No. No no no no nononono! Not here! Not AGAIN!” Light hit Luna from behind and above, and she turned to face it. Rising above the horizon, was a large, beautiful orb, mostly blue, with large patches of green and brown, covered by a veil of white wisps.
Luna's anguished wail echoed for miles.
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O shit she back on the moon
Did Sugar Heart dive through after Luna?
<checks tag list for Grim, Dark, or Explosive Decompression>
Phew! Still, I'm kind of concerned...
I love how he pulled a Chell on Luna there. Very well played Discord!
Still tho, sending Luna to the moon again? That so very, very low. Poor Woona..
Noooooooo! WOONA!
That's a little dark, even for Discord. He didn't seem like the type to imprison others. Still, great chapter.
...and that's how Moonstuck was made!
616265 Actually, I think he put her ON the moon, rather than IN it like the first time. I'm if she had the power, she could teleport back....she probably doesn't though....Hmmm....
By the great Old Ones! Not that desolated rock again!
P.S.
I love the portal gun reference
*achivement unlocked* - lunacy
Also. If this story had à grimdark tag then sugar would die next chapter. Thankfully, there is none.
Looking forward to the next chapter :D
That is low, even for you Discord!
Blue and Orange
Nice reference there!
Also Gelatin is best defense
Let's hope that a certain non-immortal pony who had the gumption to dive through the portal after Luna is able to somehow survive on the moon's surface...or at least that Equestria's moon is somewhat habitable. Otherwise, things could get ugly.
Portal 2 much?
ooo, you got me on pins and needles.
Actually gelatin wall is kinda gruesome when you think about it... powdered bone slime and all that jazz.
Also, many feels for Luna, but at least she won't be all alone this time. Thupped and fave'd, can't wait for the next part! Please keep writing, I'll keep reading!
t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSYfILhwMwGae2gvP3bw8ajp_uHM12uz1YJ0cyG_Vzy_NpySJEoXUXqb_gv
To help assuage a few fears: don't worry, Luna's not gonna find a decompressed green corpse on the moon. How mean do you think I am? Considering that I'm writing a fic about magic talking ponies, I think it's not too much of a stretch to figure they can breathe up there. That's not to say Sugar Heart is going to escape the next chapter entirely unscathed, but the things I subject her to will be within the same general ballpark as what could be expected from the Return of Harmony episode itself.
619975
Let's just assume that Equestrian gelatin is made differently from real world gelatin
whoever disliked this i am going to personally hunt down with my angry mob of ponies and kill them
627534
Aw, don't be like that. Love and tolerate and such, right? :)
'Sides, 1 verses 186 is not a bad score IMHO.
621363
It would make more sense to say that, as a living goddess of the moon, Luna can survive there, and can probably allow Sugar Heart so be okay there too. Less of a stretch.
My, oh my, but Discord's a sadistic creep. I eagerly look forward to your next installment.
Oh wow. I really laughed at the Thinking with Portals thing. And Discord's really fun... but this... wow, this is just plain cruel.
Oh man, and it all started so funny.
First that Q reference (actually Discord is one living Q reference, you know finger-snippin'-things-disappearin', not to mention that he is voiced by "the" John de Lancie who is "the" Q) with the "red shirts" and then the "Portal 2 the moon" thing. I'm just about to get into the next chapter!
PS: From what I read from the storywritters, NMM wasn't banished "on" the moon but rather "in" the moon, much like a stasis/cryo prison. Yet certain things are oke with artistic freedom, I guess. It's non the less more dramatic this way.
While I love the Star Trek reference, in the era in which Q appeared, Star Trek security personnel (the "red shirts") actually wore yellow uniforms, while the command personnel wore red.
uscerock.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/TheMoreYouKnow-300x197.jpg
So Discord was the one that invented the portal gun......
judgeing by all the chaos Aperture Science creates i guess it does make sense
Just going to be a science nazi here, even if most of us know better anyway.
There is no sound in space because there is no atmosphere for it to travel through, the moon doesn't have an atmosphere either. Therefore Luna's screams can't echo because she can't make a sound
Still a great chapter don't get me wrong
723552
Science kinda got thrown out the window in this story. It kinda happens sometimes.
Space? Space?! SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
715537
I think he's invoking the Trope itself with those two: the idea that the guards are little more than fodder to be briefly mourned over, then completely forgotten. The fact that it's a reference to Star Trek coming from a Q-esque character makes it all the funnier.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RedShirt
Great story so far. Nice portal reference.
...of course Discord would be a natural at thinking with portals.
And honestly, I'm expecting something the scene on Mars from Watchmen.
"Oh, Sugar Heart! Well, at least I'm not alone. Oh wait, you need air. Crap..."
But then, if Luna's anguished wail can be heard then maybe the moon DOES have some sort of atmosphere and we don't have to worry about it.
621379 It's Discord I assume it's made the real way... from the horn and wings he took earlier
The moon.
2740204 SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!
Despite awesome Portal reference, that was cruel. Effective, but cruel.
I see what you did there!
Is the answer D) A jar of almonds?
So basically she's been Wheatley-ed.
Maybe she'll bump into him, and have a nice, intellectual-quotient-lowering conversation, knowing exactly what he is.