Hmm, interesting take on Changelings, and from a HiE-esque story, too.

It's already going to be VERY interesting to see how he copes with the changeling's only form of nourishment.

interesting indeed, its good to see story's whit Chrysalis/changlings soming out only a few days after the episode, she (Chrysalis) is my new favourite villain, there just something with her that's well perfect, and i hope your story lives up to it

lol you are fast i was just thinking of a hie changeling story yesterday, well good story will favorite.

you are the first changeling hie story grats

lul I think 500k+ Bronies had the same idea to this story myself included.

will keep in tabs

Please sir, may I have some more?

Buh?

this was indeed an interesting take on a HiE, the story and writing so far was okey not excellent but still good, i will track this and see where it you decide to take it.

i see you have tag´d Chrysalis in this which is awesome that she will show up because she is nothing but a total badass, and you brought up a good point in the story that ihadn't relay considered until now,

the changelings use love as food, now that puts the situation in a diffident light, shes still evil even tho i don't think pony's who'd die from it, even tho we never saw a changing feed of a pony in the episode, it cant be a nice felling.

anyways ill track this and see where you take it good luck whit future writing

Looking good so far, eagerly awaiting more.

can't...stop...reading...

need...more

I like it more plz

Loving it so far, but I did notice one small possible error. You mentioned fur on your changeling, but considering their insectoid nature, it's unlikely they actually have fur. Probably more of a chitinous shell.

Apart from that, looking forward to see how this goes!

I do so enjoy a good human turned something other than pony story.

Another story to add to my ranks of "human turned something other the pony" stories. I think this is the 3rd one i tracked.

feels good Batman

DAMMIT! Someone got to it before me...

>>487485487485

I should hope it is, seeing as that's the angle I'm going for!

>>487488487488

I know this is out rather quick, but the idea hit me like a bear trap and wouldn't let go!

>>487506487506

Thinking, as in writing your own? Or just waiting for one to appear?

>>487513487513

R-Really? If you're right, woohoo

>>487514487514

Ha, I don't know about that number, but it is too interesting an angle to leave alone, no? And thank you!

>>487526487526

Certainly, In a (hopefully little) while.

>>487615487615

Hmm?

>>487619487619

Thank you! I know it's not my best work, being in a bit of a rush to get it out, but hopefully it'll get better... and writing new angles on things is just what I do.

>>487837487837

Thank you!

>>487877487877

Oh, my... "need" more? You may want to get that checked out!

>>488016488016

Thank you! More there will be... when I can get time.

>>488041488041

Curious thing to point out, and while I would consider it any other day, it's rather important the main character get a bit scraped up as he has. Kind of difficult to do that with an exoskeleton...

>>488099488099

As do I!

>>488115488115

Ooo, thank you!

>>488198488198

Thank you(?)

>>488383488383

S-sorry! Please, go ahead and write yours, too! I'm sure there will be more like it before long, anyway.

>>488422488422 Perfectly understandable, but there is always the idea that he could molt his cracked and beaten up exoskeleton. Both would work fine though

>>488439488439

M-hm, that is an idea... Perhaps in some future edit. I'm too lazy/anxious to get on with the rest of the story.

awesome story faved for more chapters if that's ok with you

>>488519488519

And why wouldn't it be? It's great to know there are people who want to read more!

MAKE MORE NOW IM LOOKING FOR MORE BRONY INTO CHANGELING STORY BUT CANT FIND ANY ON GOOGLE NOOOOOOOOO

[WHYYYYYYYYY]

<NOOOOOOO>

{SHUT UP BLOOD HEART HE WILL MAKE MORE RIGHT]('');

>>489865489865

S-seriously? There are no others? I am most honestly surprised! And of course writing more is the plan!

WELL write now please And no joke i looked on google for more just took me back to this the only one Grats ('');

I want more of it, though I already know it won't be like Ballad pf Echo the Diamond Dog, with comedy at moments mixed with good and at times sad story, since the only tags here are "Sad, Dark, Human". Unless you plan to add more later. I just hope my guess is right and Fluttershy actually wanted to help him and injuries show in each form.(Come on, Fluttershy would help ANY animal, take a look at Angel)

>>490011490011

Ha, I have class in less than 20 minutes! Maybe after? And it is nice to know I'm in uncharted territory...

>>490063490063

I never read the Ballad of Echo, but I'd heard of it, and be lying if I said it wasn't in my mind when I started this.Honestly, this was a kind of "whim" piece, so there is some malleability there. As for Fluttershy... who knows?

WTF where do you live its 7:47 pm here DAMMIT

Yep, saw this coming. I just knew that the moment I saw the Changelings, that if someone was willing to make a Diamond Dog out of themselfs and make them seem far more well rounded then the show protrays them, then someone else will end up a Changeling. Don't get me wrong, it's always great to see a self insert that isn't a pony, and you've done a wonderful job protraying it so far. I just saw it coming.

*claps* Yay! I wanna see how this goes, for if I ever get sent to equestria as a changeling, I'll have a slightly better idea of what to do!

>>490391490391

Um, I don't know where you got that impression from, but this is not a self-insert... But thank you for the "wonderful job" comment!

>>490652490652

Ha! Never thought of employing a piece of fan fiction as a guide for surviving in another world!

Awesome concept, and I hope to see more.

>>491084491084

Never?! Oh my! But I thought thats what all of these HiE fics were... Maybe Im doing it wrong...

Oh very nice! More please.

>>491538491538

No need to hope! More there shall be!

>>491560491560

Silly-filly, there's no wrong way to read!

>>491593491593

Thank you!

>>491772491772

True enough! Well, unless i tried to read underwater. I don't think the books or my laptop would much appriciate that! Or what if I tried to read in the dark! That would hurt my eyes! Or if I tried to read on fire! I could never sit still long enough to get any sense, and I would be all "Im on fire! Help me help!" And then you'd be like "How much do you have read?" And I would respond" i've only read one paragrapgh and It's been three minutes! This isn't working at all!" Or I could try reading on the Moon! Actually, that would be fun!

I can read wrong, I just have to ignore everything logical and do things that I've learned are generally a bad idea!

That was fun to write!

THIS STORY ROCKS!

>>493304493304

Thank you!

MAke more NOOWWWW

Me...

Me gusta.

Exactly the type of fic I was looking for, and now im interested to see how the story will develop from here =D

>>494768494768

E-exactly? Well, I hope that sentiment continues as the story develops! Thank you!

Sorry IM GONNA BE IMPATIANT WHTA you mean before friday :( well atleast promise me gonna be long :) thanks

ill try to wait but no promises

>>487526487526 Oh, you!

Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Fluttershy_lolface.png

favoriting, thumbing up, and following! bravo bravo *claps* love the story and how it started keep up the work!  

>>495386495386

Wow, thank you a lot! I hope not to disappoint in the future!

I hope this updates soon! Even though I am very jealous, as this totally outshines my story!

It always has to be a Brony...

>>498167498167

Is "soon" before the end of the week? And don't worry! With practice, you can get better!

>>499983499983

Actually, in this story, it is pretty important... I will say that knowing the characters would certainly help in imitating them as a Changeling, wouldn't you think?...

Author's Notes:

Woah… This chapter turned out, as I've said, almost twice as long as I anticipated… Even as you all, I suspect, would like for such a trend to continue, I hope it doesn't! Trying to get this done by the day I told myself I would put it up nearly wore my fingers down! That, and I suspect the editing could still use some work… As I have no betas, I suppose I'll turn to you, my readers, for help. So, please, point out anything you even think you spot.

I LOVED IT

i can beta read for you

yay cant wait for the next one

I like it.

Ouch, this can't end well

I can't wait to see what happend next. MOAR!

I like this. I like it a lot.

>>507633507633 Actually, it would be much better if you kept at least a minimum word count of 4k words for each chapter. Having a goal for words can be hard and, at times, really annoying, but it does a lot to improve your style if you really try to meet those demands. As for this story itself, it's pretty average. I knew it was only a matter of time when it came to a species-swap Changeling HiE, and this one pulls it off rather well. Not knowing how to control his powers, let alone how to even eat is a really interesting tone-down for what could have turned into a "lol let's screw with ponyville" story. Those are annoying. However, you've done something pretty neat with the story here: the reluctant villain. Nobody ever writes reluctant villain-heroes anymore, especially in fanfiction, where even if their guys aren't mary-sues, they still want to be portrayed as the hero.

Barring a review longer than your first chapter (which, yes, I have written those before, if very rarely. Fear the review, my friend) which I won't do simply because I'm short on time right now, your story needs a lot of work. I recommend getting a team of volunteer pre-readers and editors together (there's a difference between the two) and firing everything you've got. Most of the general "i will beta read for you" people can't be trusted, by the way, and it's often easier to tell who's criticism is valid simply by looking at how they support their argument of "why" it's good or bad. I recommend looking through some of the various "Editors/Prereaders" groups on fimfic, because there's always some volunteers. Also: use google docs. It can be confusing at times but can be incredibly useful for editing your fic once you get used to the layout. It'll speed up the editing process, trust me, probably by an entire few days. Otherwise I'd be happy to volunteer me services as an editor.

Also, the difference between an editor and a prereader (beta reader, some will say) is that editors are the ones that tell you your writing is garbage and how to fix it, while prereaders tell you you're awesome and if they could preread the next chapter it would be really nice.

In short: Good concept, flaw-ridden writing, needs lots of work, but still promises. Good luck, mate.

Excellent story can't wait for the next chapter.

After slogging through dozens of stories about Changelings or Chrysalis, I have a small pile of three or four worth following. This is certainly one of them; keep up the good work!

I hate stories in present tense form, I prefer past tense but this story plot is so good that even though I hate the style of writing I keep on reading, no ofense or anything  

Cliffhanger.

We meet again...

Looking forward to more!

Yes, this is certainly developing in a very interesting direction. Keep it up.

>>507710507710 >>507722507722 >>507739507739 >>507747507747 >>507801507801 >>508019508019 >>508045508045 >>508085508085 >>508111508111

Thank you all so much! Now I'm even more sorry I can't get stuff out quicker for you...

>>507854507854

And thank you for your honesty and time!

First, I have always preferred more grey-toned stories, with all characters having good and bad points. It makes the characters more interesting, and as I believe characters are the most important component of prose, more interesting is always better. I'm sure, however, you can already tell this by how much focus I put the main character's thoughts.

Second, word count is something I've learned to ignore, myself. What constitutes a "chapter" is, after all, too plastic and ultimately unimportant. Whether a 75K piece is split into 20 chapters or 50 makes no difference to anything but the metatext. Putting details where they matter and leaving out things that do nothing is much more indicative of skill, I say.

Third, thanks for that advice regarding editors and prereaders as well; I honestly wasn't aware there was even a difference! I may look into those groups, but if you're volunteering, I would at least like to know what you think so far.

While I tried looking into Google Docs, it did, indeed, scare me away. I may try again, but even I'm not sure how seriously I want to take this, at least yet. I only started this story on a whim, everything beyond the most pivotal plot points are very much written by the seat of my pants, and I know it's not my best work—I'm terrible with the first-person—so, given all that, what's happened to this story here is already past my expectations!

>>508065508065

Wow! Following something even though you hate the style? I think that says something good about the story!

>>508076508076

Oh, what fun would life be without cliffhangers?

I had to read it again a few times to understand what happened exactly.

The only question is whether this is due to your writing style or the fact that English is not my native language ...

All that is left to say is, mach weiter so, ich will mehr!

>>507710507710 YOU ARE EVERYWHERE HOW

loved the chapter btw keep it up.

Very good.

>>508281508281 is me being everywhere a problem

>>508412508412

its your face it scares me

>>508448508448 why do you think i picked it im THE DIABOLIC GNOME so i needed a creepy pic

>>508454508454

well ill see you.... everywhere i guess

Oooh, If that isn't a way to inspire some slight trust, I'm not sure what is... Although everything before that might sorta detract from that.

Still, great chapter!

>>508466508466 i am always watching

always

I beg you, please update faster. THIS IS GREAT and from many stories about changelings, this is one of the best.

awsome and congrats to 109 thumbs up

>>508735508735

That's actually the /worst/ thing you could do. Take your time; we can wait!

this is realy good please post next chapter soon me gusta

There should be a changeling emoticon

I like this story a lot

I am so so hoping for a chapter fast

Good concept

>>508242508242 >>508281508281 >>508317508317 >>508735508735 >>508787508787 >>508877508877 >>509055509055

Thank you, everyone! I really do wish I could get more out faster

>>508504508504

Pesky morals; why do they have to be so complicated? Thanks!

>>508814508814

I hope so! I don't want to lose my wonderful audience

>>509032509032

That, or a Chrysalis. Or both!

My reaction when I read the summary:

Image: http://pics.livejournal.com/reallyfuzzybee/pic/0002gq7x

I WANT MOOOOOORRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

you has earned a favorite!

you dont have to worry about loosing your audience cause the audience knows who has swag and who doesnt

>>509117509117 >>509198509198

Yay! The kind of reaction a summery should hope for!

Your story has me hanging over every word and anticipating the next chapter so much that I'm checking just about every day for an update.

Thank you for the amazing story!

"you or your queen we’re thinking"

Should be "were".

I enjoyed it, it was well written and the scenes are played out nicely. Though it was rather disconcerting to be honest. I realized one of the stories I am writing, while having nothing to do with a human in Equestria, manages to look take on much the same elements of your story; i.e. mistrust, confusion, hiding amongst the ponies, feeding off love, ect...

Hopefully I won't have to change it too much to avoid it being a "copy" of your story.

>>508241508241 Ah, yes. On the note of word count, I personally believe that the word count matters to the reader as far as the time it takes to read and, to a point, it reflects how much effort the author either chooses to put into the story, or is forced to due to conditions otherwise, but mostly just general choice is perceived. Many busy fanfic authors have chosen to release longer wordcount chapters, even if it takes a bit more time. That's just opinion on my side, mostly, but it's from an educated observation as far as I can see - but then again, I'm me, so... ah, I digress.

Google docs mostly just really speeds up editing time. If there was another, quicker way to contact you, I'd be happy to give you a brief run-down of how to set up an editable story on there. As for the volunteering thing, I'll definitely put some more input in, but as of right now I've little time to devote to major reviews, not like I usually do at least. Finals and all. I'd be happy to do it whenever I can, though.

>>509931509931

Thank you, but there's no need for that; favoriting a story will tell you when it updates. That, and it will be a while before the next chapter.

>>510055510055

Thanks for catching that!

>>510060510060

Thank you!... And it's not like there has never been fan fiction pieces that are basically carbon copies of each other, right? Besides, more goes into a story than themes. Characters, delivery, tone... if enough of those a different to create a unique reading experience, then I don't have a problem!

>>510288510288

Indeed. I just thought I would mention it; I don't want to be called a... "Changeling", if you catch my drift.

>>510576510576

Oh, that's a good one!

I had the same idea to write a HiE fanfic where the guy gets turned into a changeling.  However before I was going to work on it anymore I searched the site to see if it had been done yet, and I see someone was way ahead of me.  

But your story is really well done and I can't wait to read more of it.  

Ye seem ta have gotten this a lot, but...

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

In fact, I reckon ye'll get yer storee featured on tha' shinee box a' the mast o' the ship ta starboard quicker than ye can sing "This Day Aria" in its entiritee. Insert obligatoree ARRGH 'ere. </talk_like_a_pirate>

ANYHOW, for those who don't take MOAR for an answer, I love this story and I dearly wish to see more! This has been tracked and given a thumbs up.

>>512478512478

You should totally write your own story. There can never be enough fictions and everyone should be able to express their own ideas without the fear of "copying" someone else just because there may be similarities.

Also, I'm bored and want to read more "human gets turned into changeling"-stories. ... I demand MOAR!

>>511177511177

I demand MOAR from you too! But I already wrote that earlier.. Yesterday..

>>512478512478

As DergrößteBrony said, you should go on ahead with yours anyway, and as I've said to Basilisk Hack, especially if it has a completely different tone.

>>516299516299

Nice sentiment, but I really doubt it. Thank you anyway, for the track and thumbs up, too!

dude make like 1000 or 1400 words not 5000 then we wait longer sure not big but hey its faster ('');

moar

I really like the premise for the story. My only gripe is that there are a lot of grammar mistakes; mostly misused verb forms. If you want a pre-reader/editor, I'd be happy to help out!

This story isn't bad! Though, it's a little amazing how many views and likes it's got. With only 2 chapters! Just goes to show how much an original idea is appreciated. Good luck with the story.! Oh, and update now! Or, you know, when the chapters ready. Either one's fine.

I sense Twilight having a bit of a crisis. A random changeling out of nowhere just displayed more concern for her friends' well-being than she did by stopping her from hurting one of them.

Great story so far.

Also, looking forward to seeing how he'll explain his knowledge. "Changeling Sense" would be very simple and very frustrating to Twilight.

>>523764523764

That's what I'm thinking! I didn't expect to even reach 100 favorites!

And I'm working on it! Really, literally writing right now.

>>523856523856

Perhaps... there is always more than one way to interpret an action...

While I think that idea would be fun, that's probably more fit for a normal, comedy, and/or random story... of which this is none.

>>524481524481 I look forward to your next chapter! I'll be honest, I was slightly confused by some of chapter two, but I'm sure that it will become clear next chapter. Like, why do Rarity and Fluttershy pretend that they don't know who the changeling is?

Shit just hit the fan