7
53
124
Joined August 2011
34
1,589
In a small town on the borders of Equestria, a little colt learns how to forge weapons from his father. But swords are not always friendly to the pony that wields them. As time goes by the colt must also confront the harsh lessons of the world outside the forge, and come face-to-face with the cost of protecting what he cares for.
Winner of the Ponychan March write-off!
Glorious. I see now why My Little Metro has been on hold as of late, and in all honestly I couldn't care less. You got yourself another masterpiece here. Although complete, you just built yourself an excellent background for a huge adventure story. I'd love to see it one day become that. Keep up the good work.
(eagerly awaits the next My Little Metro chapter)
I read this orginially as part of the PonyChan contest, it was my #1 pick out of the 19 and one I rated as 10 out of 10 on a review to that contest. I was really happy to see it win.
I have not seen your story "Metro." but I will check it out. I also hope you might continue this story line as well.
UPDATE MY POST!!!!!!!
I just found your "My Little Metro," I DID read the first few chapters of this last August but then lost track of it. I been trying to find it again for a while but couldn't remember the name, author, or enough specific details to locate it again. I tried reading some of the other post apocalypse MLP stories but found them too video-game like. This reminded me of a book (and Movie) called "City of Ember." Did you read that?
In fact I have not! But I'm glad you think Metro is a bit more "realistic." That's the actual feel I was going for; it wasn't just a "video game crossover." It was a story about ponies actually living a post-apocalyptic lifestyle against horrible monsters. In fact, I was going more for the feel of the book Metro 2033 than the video game. Of course, I had to make a few sacrifices here and there. It's about ponies and magic after all!
I'm not a fan of post-apocalyptic stuff so I'm skipping on MLM, but I have to say that this one is great. Good job on this. I particularly liked the long bits about how a sword is a tool, and it's the being behind the sword that defines intent. A very important lesson not just for swords, but for any kind of power one holds, and one civilizations forget at their peril.
Maybe! But I felt the story was pretty complete when I finished it, and anyway I'm working on my next winning write-off entry. 
Thank you!
That's too bad, MLM is gonna be my magnum opus of ponyfic, so to speak! But thank you for the comment, and I'm glad the message was so powerful and so clear.
Only one thing to say in return... thanks!
Well, color me suitably impressed. And you're also the writer of My Little Metro? I loved that story!
This fanfic caught my eye mostly because some of its elements are somewhat similar to my own story. And I'll admit, I was jealous at first that you had so many comments so soon. But after reading it, well, I can safely say you've earned all of this attention and more.
You do fantastic work with words. Some of your paragraphs ran long, but there was nary a weak sentence or a passive word that caught my eye. The characters and the pacing were especially good, I might add. I only wish you hadn't skipped the fight scene with the Timber Wolf.
I'm assuming this was a oneshot? If there's more, I can't wait to see it. If there isn't, this still works as one hell of a solid short story.
Sweet heavenly mercies this is beautiful. Legitimately beautiful. Wow.
A poet sees poetry everywhere: I see it in how you use a sort of repeating, a refrain: another day, another sword, and the like. It was lyrical when it needed to be and simple when it needed to be. A wonderful read.
And let me tell you, your fanfic is quite a story in itself. I just started reading it and I'm glad I did! I certainly hope you don't give up, and get more attention. You deserve it. Also, I'm glad you enjoy Metro, it's my favorite story too.
I think skipping the fight with the wolf was necessary for that little sucker punch I threw in at the end... I didn't want to go into too much depth and lose the impact of the last section. And yes, I believe this is the only story Reveille will get... OR IS IT?
Three awesome things wrapped in one small package. I am glad to be of service. 
Good! Super good! Because "It's A Dangerous Business" is probably my most favorite MLP fanfic ever! It inspired many others, I'm sure.
OCs deserve more love than to just be engines for an author's personal wishes, I agree. I strive to make OCs... well, their own original characters! Thanks for the comment.
Thanks a lot!
I'm glad someone noticed the repetition. Thank you!
If only you could give two thumbs up on FIMFic...
Oh wow, you actually went and read it? Thanks! You did kind of choose an awkward time, though - I'm a few hours away from updating the story by replacing all the chapters and adding an extra one toward the beginning as an in-betweener.
If you write any more stories about Reveille, I'll be keeping an eye out. In the meantime, My Little Metro has updated a ton of times since I last saw it... *cracks knuckles* Challenge Accepted.
This is excellent. Two thumbs up. Everything about carrying a sword and having to use one is directly applicable to any weapon.
Anytime someone I know talks about getting a firearm to carry I always try to talk to them about proper use of force and the responsibilities carrying entails. I always ask them to think about if they can really pull the trigger under the assumption that the other person will die. Males always tend to answer in the positive immediately, Ive found, but I ask them to really think about it. If they cant do it then it is more of a risk for them to have it.
I try to enforce that it cant be pulled out for any scuffle they may get into and indeed they should try to avoid, de-escalate, and/or exit situations that are getting bad. No macho testosterone fueled bullshit.
I also tell them that they own every bullet that comes out of the muzzle, and everything they hit they also own. Whether that be the intended target or possibly someone else down range.
Ive had coworkers mention I appear paranoid when Im walking through the parking lot. Well, not really. I try to be observant. A weapon is not a magic talisman that wards off the bad just by the fact that one has it. One must be aware of their surroundings.
Anyway I think I went off topic but oh well.
This is an absolutely magnificent tale! The climactic scene facing the timberwolf was perfect; gripping and suspenseful. There really was no need to show the battle at all. As you mentioned, it would have detracted from the later scenes. Sometimes more is said when certain things are left unspoken. The absense of the scene kept the mood and pace of the rest of the story in line, smoothly and fluidly moving along to Reveille's maturation.
I also enjoyed the lessons from his father, but I must disagree that swords can only be used for harm!
*suddenly flashing signs appear all over the screen as Flim & Flam dash out* ORDER NOW!!! The new and improved, Super Sword 3,000!! It can slice even the biggest wheels of cheese in a flash! Use it as an opener for those annoying over-taped shipping boxes! Trim even the thickest hedges with a single swing! AND WAIT!!! THERE'S MORE!! Overgrown fetlocks? Tangled mane? Not a problem for the Super Sword 3,000! Use it for laying tile! Removing makeup! Performing surgery! No job's too big for the Super Sword 3,000!!
(Order yours now for the special low price of 3 easy payments of $199.95 Order right now and get the special Super Sword Sharpener (a rock) FREE!!) 
omgwat. This cannot be the end. NO. There are so many adventures to tell of Reveille left... ;A; I really like the twist with how Opal and Reveille developed... didn't see that coming lawls XD I really liked how your characters talked in the story... they really seemed like kids... the dialogue felt very natural.
Gosh, I cannot believe this came from MLP:FiM. Oh please please continue this! :(
Reset Password
Resend Verification Email
1,589 ( 1,589 )
More
Less
Post Comment
Refresh
Cancel
Send