Chapter Eight (AKA I'll come up with a title later)
Discord had absolutely no idea what was happening. Celestia visiting his statue wasn’t really all that new, of course. Guards by his statue was uncommon, but not unheard of. The pair of them together hadn’t happened before, though, and he had certainly never been moved, or put into a chariot... and the look in Celestia’s eyes was unreadable.
The royal guards were none too gentle with him, and he was seriously worried that he would chip or fall down and break off a limb as they all but tossed him into a carriage, strapping him in and getting in formation to move.
He was truly baffled as they took off, not knowing what in the name of Equestria was going on. Was she finally going to dispose of him properly? It would be surprising, but he supposed it was a possibility.
He could see a bit underneath the cloud layer, not sure what to think as he saw Ponyville beneath him.
They started to land, and he raised a brow as he saw the array of ponies there to greet him, just hearing the end of a conversation.
“-would Princess Celestia bring along someone like that?”
The royal fax machine was trembling, looking at him with wide, terrified eyes, Ah, he missed that expression, it was so much fun to see. “Maybe- maybe you should ask her!”
The ponies all looked up, panic of their faces- except for one. Pinkie grinned up at him and waved. The other ponies paid little attention to her, instead looking at the Princess in horror. Rainbow Dash joined the group then, Fluttershy and Applejack in tow. When she saw the statue, she nearly fell out of the air, and Fluttershy shrieked. They, too, looked at the Princess in complete befuddlement.
Twilight was the first to speak. “With all due respect, Princess Celestia... how could you bring Discord here?!” she coughed lightly, blushing. “Your Majesty...”
She laughed. “I'm fully aware that the last time Discord was here, he created serious havoc.” She then raised a hoof, seeing Rainbow Dash opening her mouth to protest. “But I have reason to believe that Discord is on the brink of reformation, and I require your help to make it happen.”
She smiled at Pinkie. “Especially you, Pinkie.”
Her eyes lit up, and the grin on her face grew even larger. “Me?”
“Yes, you,” she smiled gently at the small mare. “Discord already has a fondness for you, and he seems to trust you more than he does even me.”
And I should trust you because...?
Her eyes flitted over to Discord and frowned, but he turned her gaze back to Pinkie. “I believe that if anyone could get through to him, it would be you.”
“Woah, woah, wait a minute,” Rainbow Dash frowned. “What do you mean he’s ‘fond’ of Pinkie?” she looked at the statue in suspicion.
“I believe he’s grateful for her visits, and her company.”
“Company?!” Twilight looked at Pinkie in disbelief. The mare drew back a little.
“W-well, nopony should be lonely... He wasn’t getting any visitors, and it was our fault that he was in there, so...”
“Yeah, because he tried to destroy Equestria the last time he was free!” Dash looked at her, eyes wide. “It wasn’t like he was just some random pony we put in stone!”
She frowned, standing firm. “Nopony should be lonely.”
He smiled a bit at that.
“But-”
“Nopony.”
Even Celestia was impressed by her persistence. The ponies all looked entirely unconvinced, so Celestia smiled. “Not to worry. If anything goes wrong, you’re all free to use the Elements and turn him back to his current state.”
Spike brightened. “Uh, we- we probably need a volunteer to run away from here right away to get them. I'll do it!” he started to run away, but Celestia shook her head.
“No need, Spike. I have them right here, and I've cast a spell so Discord can't take them and hide them again.” She showed them the box and each pony took their respective element. Five of the girls were looking at each other with varying levels of discomfort, while Pinkie was practically bouncing with glee. The Princess smiled at them, stepping back into her chariot. “Now, I wish I could stay, but I must return to Canterlot for Equestria's royal summit. You may release Discord when ready.” And with that, she was off.
Fluttershy looked at the statue, gulping. “D-do we have to do it now?”
Applejack sighed.
“Look, there ain’t no use in talkin’ about it, or waitin’ around. We gotta do it eventually, so might as well get it over with.”
Twilight nodded. “Alright girls, in formation. And be sure to keep your Elements on at all times until further notice.” she looked at Pinkie, still a bit unsure of what to think. “All of us.”
The spirit of chaos rolled his eyes at that, but Pinkie replied with a cheerful “Okie dokie loki!”
He watched as the Elements began to glow, and couldn’t help his stomach from clenching a bit as they started to work- after all, the last time he had seen them in use, he’d been turned to stone.
The stone around him started to crumble and dissolve, and he cackled, stretching his limbs and wiggling them to try them out. He cackled in glee, and started to stretch his talons and paw, getting ready to release a bit of magic.
“Discord, no.”
He frowned, looking at Pinkie in surprise. Then he smiled. “Pinkie! Ah, it’s so good to see you again, my dear!”
She giggled. “Nice to see you too! Well, nice to hear you, I mean, I saw you just a few days ago!”
“Alright, look,” Twilight stepped forward, looking at the pair in a mixture of annoyance and confusion. “I’m a bit surprised you’re not questioning your freedom, but-”
“Why would he be questioning it?” Pinkie cocked her head to the side, eyebrow raised. “Celetia just explained it to everypony!”
“Well, he was stone-”
“He can still hear us, you silly filly!”
Twilight looked at him for confirmation. He rolled his eyes and nodded. “Unfortunately.”
Pinkie looked at him, hurt in her eyes, and he suddenly felt the need to explain himself. “Oh, not you, Pinkie- I enjoy our conversations immensely. I mean, of course, Celestia. So full of herself, so certain- it’s completely mind numbing, listening to her drone on.”
Twilight looked horrified. “Princess Celestia isn’t-”
“If you ask me, it was because Father favored her,” he muttered to Pinkie.
“Father?” for the first time since she’d seen Discord, Twilight wasn’t angry, simply confused.
The draconequus laughed, looking at the mare in amusement. “Oh, didn’t your precious history books tell you? I grew up with Celestia and Luna,” he grinned, poofing up a cape and crown. “I’m practically royalty!”
Now all the ponies looked shocked, even Pinkie. “So that’s why Luna and Celestia are letting Screwball call them Auntie! I thought they were just being nice!”
“Screwball?” Applejack looked at Pinkie, eyebrows raised. “What’s that sweet little filly got t’do with someone like that?” she pointed to the chimera.
The cape and crown had been replaced with a baseball cap sporting the words “#1 Dad” on it, and Discord chortled. “I’ll give you girls one guess!” then he registered what Applejack had said. “... Sweet?” he gabbed Pinkie and looked at her desperately. “Pinkie Pie, what have you done to my monstrosity?”
She shrugged. “Nothing! Told her to be polite when she was at Applejack’s and Rarity’s, that’s all!”
“Wait!” Rarity stepped forward, horror in her eyes. “A-are you saying that I allowed Discord’s daughter to spend the night at my house?”
“If it’s any consolation to you, I wasn’t fond of the idea either,” the spirit glared, crossing his arms and staring down at the unicorn.
Rarity glared up at him. “Well, I can assure you, it won’t happen again.”
Pinkie frowned, getting in between the two. “Hey now, Rarity, that’s not really fair... Screwy didn’t do anything wrong!”
“No, but based on her parentage, she will- and I don’t want Sweetie Belle around her once she does,” she sniffed. “Speaking of which, school is very nearly out. I should be at home The last time I left her without an adult at the Boutique alone, she and her friends nearly burnt the place to the ground.” she scowled at Discord. “Although I have no doubt that Screwball was behind the idea of pyrotechnics in the first place.”
Discord’s eyes lit up. “Pyrotechnics? Ooh, that’s quite good... nice to see she’s still causing mayhem in my absence.”
Pinkie, who was still trying to salvage the situation, hissed, “Dissy, not now.”
“Dissy?” Dash frowned, wings up, as if ready to fly off at any moment.
Pinkie shrugged. “What? I call you Dashie!”
“That’s different!”
“Look, this conversation is just... great...” Applejack looked at the group. “But I best be gettin’ back to the farm. Just ‘cause the dam’s gone doesn’t mean there’s still not a lotta clean-up work.”
Fluttershy looked up at them. “I- I need to go talk to the beavers... Since they can’t build their dams, they... they need to find themselves a good pond instead... Sorry I have to leave...” she started off, giving Pinkie a smile and a quiet, “Good luck, Pinkie.” the smile hadn’t quite faded when she looked at Discord, something he was certainly surprised by.
The rest of the ponies left one by one, citing various reasons- Discord’s personal favorite being Rainbow Dash’s, who had flat out admitted that she just really didn’t want to be there.
Charming.
And so Discord was left alone with Pinkie who, for once, seemed quite shaken by the whole experience. The draconequus had no idea how to react to it, although he knew he didn’t like it, so he simply waited for her to speak.
“... We should go get Screwball, huh?” she finally said, looking up at Discord, looking a little drained. He followed her as she made her way towards the schoolhouse, a bit relieved as she started to perk up. “I’m sure she’ll be really happy to see you!”
_______________________________________________________________________________________
It was always interesting to be around children- that was something Discord had learned long ago. With full grown ponies, it was always the same spiel when he showed up. Panic, screaming- and that was all great fun, of course, and he never tired of it, but it was always the same.
Children, however, were different. Yes, there were screamers, of course, and cryers, but there was also such a chaotic energy in them that they generally found themselves at least slightly intrigued by the spirit. Some found him funny, some found him strange, and some loved his work- after all, much of his chaos involved candy and sweets, and what foal isn’t fond of that?
So he wasn’t precisely sure what he should expect from the foals.
The bell had already ring for school to be out, so there were very few ponies milling around the schoolhouse when Pinkie and Discord got there. Only one other filly was waiting for her respective parents to come and get them- Dinky.
Screwball was the first pony to notice her father, looking very out of place in the completely normal setting, and her purple eyes grew the size of dinner plates as a grin took over the majority of her face. Her beanie buzzed with excitement and she zipped over towards him, nearly toppling him over.
“Daddy!” she squeezed his middle hard enough that, had Discord really needed to breathe, he would have found it quite difficult. He accepted the bone-crushing hug, though, as he had little choice in the matter, and smiled back.
“Hello, my little abomination!”
“You’re back, Daddy!” her propeller buzzed even faster, and Pinkie couldn’t help but giggle at the sight.
At the word “Daddy,” the remaining filly had stopped her homework- she always liked to get it done early- and looked over, tiny heart nearly stopping at what she saw. Discord was back, standing out in the open next to the schoolhouse.
...And he was Screwball’s father?
Actually, that last one made sense, now that she really thought about it.
Dinky had let out a little squeak, alerting the odd family to her presence.
Screwball grinned, breaking away from her father and making her way over to her classmate.
“So this is my dad!” she beamed proudly. Dinky looked at the mismatched creature again, the fear ebbing away and getting replaced with interest.
She’d seen many things in her young life that others had never even dreamed of. Her mother’s very special somepony took them on the most amazing adventures, seeing creatures from all walks of life, and planets and galaxies and amazing, amazing things. And these experiences had left her with the knowledge that one could never jump to conclusions based on looks, or based on unfounded fear.
And surprisingly, despite the fact many would argue a fear of Discord was perfectly founded, other than the initial fear she’d had at seeing him, she wasn’t really afraid of him. She was a lot more nervous about how he’d gotten free then the fact that he actually was free.
So she made her way over to the draconequus, cocking a brow. “You’re supposed to be in stone, aren’t you, mister?”
Discord looked down at the foal, and cackled, “Nope! Freed on the Princess’ orders!” he snapped, producing a very legitimate and very important legal document proving his parole.
“This is a ‘Get Out Of Jail Free’ card from Maneopoly,” Dinky said, looking unamused. Pinkie giggled from behind him, and she really noticed the mare for the first time. Usually Pinkie would draw attention immediately, but in the surprise of seeing Discord, Dinky hadn’t noticed much else. She supposed if Pinkie was there, there really was no chance she was in any sort of danger, so the tiny bit of apprehension she still had vanished.
“Is it?” he took the card back, looking over it. Then he shrugged and tossed it behind him, and Screwball grinned, taking it and popping it in her mouth.
Yeah, she was definitely related to the draconequus.
“Well, what about this?” he snapped up another document, this time quite a bit more official looking.
She took it and inspected it carefully, scanning over it. “The shade of yellow is the official color for parole documents, the signature doesn’t seem forged...” she squinted, then lit up. “Nope, this isn’t official! It’s fake!”
Discord blinked, then cocked a brow. “How in the world could you know that, my dear?”
“Lookit the seal, Mr. Discord,” she pointed her hoof to the seal, and he looked with interest. “You’re using the old Canterlot seal, like the one from a few thousand years ago. Half moon, half sun! Up until recently, it had just been changed to the sun, but it got changed back. It’s actually hard to tell if you don’t know your stuff, but if you do, it’s obvious! The really old seal has a half moon, half sun, but the current one is half a sun and a quarter of a moon, with a star in the empty dark space. You did a good job, though!” she smiled. “I wouldn’t have known if my daddy didn’t help design all three- and besides, there’s no way you’d know about the changing seals, since you’ve been trapped for so long!”
He looked at her, impressed. “Well, that may come in handy in the future... Wait,” he stopped. “He designed all three?”
“Yup!” she beamed.
“How old is your father, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“How old is his equine form, or are you going to count when he was bipedal? Because the second one might take some time to figure out...”
“Dinky?” a gray pegasus mare looked at the unicorn, waving her over. “Come on, muffin- Daddy wanted to visit Mr. Starswirl again today, remember?”
The unicorn immediately lit up. “Oh, yeah! I forgot!” she grabbed her saddlebags and started to scamper away. “Bye Mr. Discord!”
The mare’s crossed eyes looked at him and focused, as if noticing him for the first time. “Oh! Hiya!” she didn’t look alarmed, instead smiling cheerily. “Free already? I thought that wasn’t supposed to be until next week!”
“No, mom, you’re messing up timelines again!”
“Ohhh, whoops!” the mare blushed a bit, sheepishly. “Sorry!”
Pinkie shrugged. “No problem, Ditzy! Hey, you’re going to come into Sugarcube Corner tomorrow, right? Screwy finally perfected her new muffin recipe!”
Screwball, who was back in between her dad’s horns, grinned. “They don’t blow up anymore!”
Ditzy looked excited. “Of course!” she waved to Discord, bubbly and beaming. “I’ll see you around!”
“I suppose so.” Discord still wasn’t quite sure what was going on, but the combination of all of the mares’ energy was enjoyable, at the least.
Screwball watched as the family left, smiling. “They’re crazy like us, Daddy. I like ‘em.”
Discord laughed. “You know? I do too. They’re entertaining.”
Pinkie Pie finally spoke up. “Well then, you’re in luck! Ditzy comes by the bakery all the time, so you’re definitely going to get to see them!”
The pink filly beamed. “Daddy's going to live with us in the bakery?”
“Yup! I dunno how the Cakes are gonna like that,” she looked at Discord, a bit apologetic, “but they’ll let it happen. Royal orders, after all!”
“So Auntie ‘Tia’s lettin’ him stay? She’s not gonna send him back?”
“Nope!”
The filly grinned. “Yes!”
As Pinkie explained the situation, Discord was happy to hear that the filly seemed to be understanding everything. Good, he didn’t want to have to explain too much. Explaining was boring.
Then Screwball’s beanie buzzed, a sure sign that she was excited. “Mom and Dad are gonna live together! Finally!” she hoofpumped. “And since Daddy’s free, and he and Mommy are together... that means you two can finally get married, like I said!”
Discord felt his body run cold, and he looked down at Pinkie, who suddenly seemed very awkward and small.
Alright, maybe they’d have a little explaining to do.
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You are cranking these chapters out like crazy! I'm impressed! Wish I could do that with my stories, but, alas, I am not quite that talented. And I have to admit, I really don't like Screwball, and I was a little disappointed when you brought her into the story, but I actually think you're doing a really nice job with her. People tend to make her into an idiot, but you've made her out to be just immature and childlike, which I find extremely likable and realistic, so well done! I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
Yay, Discord's finally free!. Also, I found all the references to Doctor Whooves pretty awesome.
5071498 Whenever I see the name Pink Chaos, Or Visiting chaos I have an orgasm.
Ah, now things are getting interesting. And awkward, actually. A strange mixture of both.
Nonetheless, good chapter, sweet story, happy readers, keep it up!
Meh! This chapter's okay.
Do like how you are crankin' em out.
Have a haiku:
The insane abound
Chaos in a straight jacket
Urinating beer
5082493 Really? I thought that a draconequus was a subspecies of chimera, since they're made of several different parts of other animals? Like that's the definition of a chimera, and the wiki says he technically is one...
I could be wrong, though, so thanks for pointing it out!
5082466 Aw, thanks!
And yeah, he has so many great facial expressions, there really should be at least one emoticon of him! Get on it, FIMfiction, chop chop!
As I read this I said, "And he should trust you because...?"
I think your screwball might be better than mine
You could call this chapter Finally Free.
I actually have a teacher who's son prefers greens over sweets.
Derpy is my favorite pony, period but I just love having Dinky and Derpy in my own stories, really great job. Honestly hope you keep writing, you're doing amazing.
Screwball has only one real mission in life and it’s to finally get this family together.
Also YAAYYYYY DITZY AND DOCTOR WHOOVES CANON!!!!!!!!!!!!!