Chapter 3: Diamond in the Ruff

“Say, what time is it?” Tellis asked.

“Oh, ahd say around eleven, why’d you ask?”

Tellis told them all about him meeting Pinkie Pie and the party she said she’d throw him.

“Aww, can we come?” Scootaloo asked Tellis.

“Well, I guess kid, as long as it’s okay with Applejack here, that is,” Tellis replied to Scootaloo.

“It’s all right with me, Tellis, just be sure you go an’ find Pinkie and tell her ‘no booze’, ‘kay? Sorry ah can’t come with y’all, but ahm real busy and need to get back to selling Zap-Apple Jam” Applejack told Tellis.

“Will do, hey do you know where I can get some new duds? These ones are getting kind of…destroyed.” Tellis asked Applejack.

“Well, there’s Rarity’s Boutique, but ah don’t think she’ll take you as you is, Tellis, you might wanna head over to that spa in town. Ah hear that it’s just the right sort of place fer whatcha need.” Applejack told Tellis.

“A spa? Really? Well… That sounds like a grrreat idea! I mean, I’ve literally been to tartaurus and back like 5 times in the past 2 days. I deserve some freakin R&R!” Tellis shouted out into the heavens as he ran off, laughing like a madpony.

“Ya know, ah think him and Pinkie are gonna get along just dandy...”Applejack whispered to herself.

Tellis entered the door of the spa, walked over to the counter and said as he slammed his bag of bits on the counter revealing the coins inside of it, “I… need… a spa!”

The mare behind the counter was lazily filing her hoof said, “Sir, this is a spa, not a hospital, I mean, just look at you!” then, she actually looked up and saw the small fortune laid before her,” Oh, my… girls! We have a customer! Double it, now! Its go time! What do you need, sir? “

“Gimmie the works,” Said Tellis as he pointed at a sign with the words "The Works, 100 bits" on it.  Now Tellis was going to use all of the money to buy a house in Ponyville, but he’d forgotten all about that, now all he cares about is living life to its fullest. It’s amazing how much a gun in your face can change your outlook on life. An hour later, the spa treatment was done. ”Wow, that was pretty fast… but effective!” Said a cleaned up, refreshed-looking Tellis. He tossed his old clothes in a trash can a, white shirt and a dusty brown jacket, “Don’t need those anymore!

Tellis walked outside, where he looked up into the sky and saw an airship in the distance, “How’s the weather up there!” he shouted at the passengers of the faraway craft. They didn’t seem to hear him. Tellis headed over to where applejack told him Rarity’s Boutique was. But before he could go inside, Tellis had a sense of terrible foreboding, like something awful was about to happen. He couldn’t quite put his hoof on it, but it was something about the air. It seemed…different than before. It smelled the same, tasted the same, but it just felt…like there was a heaviness to it. Like Tellis was walking through the thinnest of mist. He decided that it was something at the spa that made him have that sensation, and continued on his way into the Boutique to get some new duds.

A sign read above the door ‘Carousel Boutique’ and Tellis smiled when he read this. A bell rang as Tellis walked inside the store. “Um, hello? Is Rarity in? I was told this was THE place to get clothes.” Tellis called out into a big main room.

“I’ll be right there, darling, don’t you worry! Oh my, aren’t you just dashing? “Rarity said as she stepped down the stairs.

“Oh, well thank you, Miss,” Tellis said while he examined a painting of a white cat.

“What was that, dear? Oh, I wasn’t speaking to you, sorry about that,” Rarity told her visitor while she set a mirror down on a small desk at the bottom of the stairs.

“Heh, well I can certainly see why, Miss Rarity” Tellis complimented Rarity.

“Why thank you, mister…” Rarity thanked Tellis.

“Sorry for not first introducing myself. My name is Tellis, your friend Applejack requested that I simply must come here if I wanted new clothes. And my, it does seem like there’s just an amazing selection here,” Tellis answered.  

“Well, you do seem to have fine taste; I don’t think I’ve seen you around Ponyville, Tellis. are you new around here?” Rarity asked Tellis.

Tellis answered Rarity’s question, “Why, yes, in fact, I am new in town.”

“Oh, yes, I do believe that my friend Pinkie Pie was talking about you earlier, when she stopped by to invite me to a party oh hers. By the way she described you, she made it seem like you were covered from head to hoof with dirt! Now, what is it that you need?” Rarity said to Tellis.

“Well, I’m pressed for time and what I need is something stylish, but practical…like that over there!” Tellis pointed with his leg at the Mannequin wearing almost exactly what he was wearing before, what a coincidence! But, there was a difference, as he examined the clothing; he noticed that there were 2 diamonds encrusted into the collar and there were black pants that went with it.

“Oh, that old thing? That’s something that I started on but then stopped when I got this big order from… now who was it that I got that order from? Anywho, are you sure that’s what you want? “

“Yes, I’m completely sure, and I also want to buy that hat,” Tellis pointed at a black hat on a rack

“Oh, that would look just marvelous!” Rarity called out.

Tellis made his purchase of the clothes that were on the Mannequin

“simply astonishing!” Rarity shouted out.

Tellis walked over to a mirror and said,” Good as new! Actually, better than new!” Tellis turned to Rarity and thanked her. “See you at that party, Rarity, and thanks again!” Tellis called out as he left the boutique.

He saw the town hall’s clock; it was 15 minutes until the party! And he had no idea where Sugarcube corner was! He began asking ponies where it was, and several said they didn’t know, and others just ignored him until he asked a light-blue unicorn where it was. “Well, I’m on my way there right now! Say… you seem famil- YOU!! You were that guy that destroyed my trashcan! What the hay!”

“I’m really sorry about that, miss, but it was an emergency!” Tellis apologized as he walked along with the unicorn.

“What kind of emergency involves smashing my stuff? You have to pay me back, you know, like you said.” The Unicorn said to Tellis as she began to move faster.  

“Well, what do I owe you? 10, 15 bits?” Tellis asked the unicorn.

“Uhh… you owe me…30 bits.” The unicorn said with narrowed eyes.

“30 bits?! That’s an expensive trashcan, lady. Oh well, here’s the last of my money, 28 bits, won’t need this bag anymore.” Tellis told the unicorn as he tossed his raggedy saddlebag aside.

“Thanks, and my name isn’t lady, it’s Lyra. Oh, were here, time to finally ditch you.” Lyra said as she counted out her bits.

“Tellis! I’m so happy you’re here!” Pinkie Pie shouted as she saw Tellis approaching Sugarcube corner. “It’s time to get this party started!!” the invited ponies all went inside and there was loud drum and bass music playing on a stereo at a table in the middle of the room.  

(Play: Sigma-Paint it Black)

Tellis had to yell over the pumping bass, “Oh, yeah, Pinkie! I almost forgot to tell you to hide the booze! There’s gonna be fillies at this party, and Applejack would kill me if she learned there was alcohol here!”

“We’ll, it’s a good thing I already-hic- drank the first 6 pack!” Pinkie shouted as she continued to dance wildly.

“Pinkie, that isn’t a good thing! I need to get the alcohol out of here before those 3 get here! Where is it?” Tellis called out to Pinkie.

“It’s over there! By the snacks!” Pinkie answered Tellis before shouting,” Whooooooohoooooooo!” Pinkie then danced off into the crowd of ponies.

Tellis walked over to the snack table; where there were 4 six packs of Budwinner. He took them all in his forelegs and he was met by protest by several ponies near the table.

“Sorry, guys, but there’s fillies here.” Apologized Tellis as he took the hooch out the back door, and he set it all on a crate. ”Hmm…” Tellis took one and chugged it, and as he finished he noticed out of the corner of his eye, that there was a yellow pegasus standing nearby, trying to look inconspicuous.

“Hey, what up, girl! Whatchu doin out here, all by yourself, and not inside at the party? “Tellis confidently asked the pegasus as he slid up to her.

“I… um…” the pegasus shyly said.

“How about a name? You got one, right?” Tellis grabbed another beer, offered the pegasus it and she took it. She didn’t open it.

“My name’s… Fluttershy” She said in a shy, ghost-like voice.

“My name’s Tellis! Nice to meet you, Fluttershy!” Tellis said with a smile as he extended his hoof in friendship. Fluttershy tried to shake his hoof with the Buwinner can in hers, but it slipped out of her grasp and it busted on the ground, spraying everywhere.

“Oh, man! Let’s get out of here!” Tellis quickly led Fluttershy inside the building while shielding her from the spraying foam. They got to the kitchen, to clean themselves up

“Oh, no…I’m so sorry Tellis…I didn’t mean to-“Fluttershy’s apology was interrupted by Tellis.

“Naw, naw, don’t worry about it, it was my fault, anyways, I’m the one who knocked it out of your hoof anyways, I’m the one who should be apologizing,” Tellis said as he hooved a towel to Fluttershy and grabbed another one for himself. ”Well, I’M heading back to the party, you comin?” Tellis asked Fluttershy.

“Sure, I’d love to.” Fluttershy quietly answered.

The two ponies walked back into the main room, where the party was going down full swing now.

“My friends are over there…”Fluttershy said as she pointed over to where Twilight, Rarity, Pinkie, and a blue rainbow-maned pegasus were, they were drinking punch and talking together.

“Guys, this is-“Fluttershy was interrupted by Twilight.

“We know who he is, Fluttershy, and I was just telling Rainbow Dash about him, too.”

“So, you’re the one who broke into Twilight’s house…” Rainbow Dash said with a serious expression on her face,” You gotta teach me how to do that sometime!”

“I’ll put it on my to-do list,” Tellis replied.

“Tellis, darling, you didn’t really break into Twilight’s house last night, did you?” Rarity asked Tellis, then took a sip of punch.

“Well, Rarity, I hate to break it to you, but I did break into Twilight’s house last night.” Tellis confidently boasted to Rarity.

Rarity scoffed and turned her nose in the air,” why of all the most vile…”

“Well, just be glad Twi didn’t call Sheriff Shooter on you, there’s a reason that’s his name, ya know.” Rainbow Dash told Tellis.

“Well, I sure am now that you tell me that, Rainbow Dash” Tellis replied.

“Just call me Dash or something, Tellis,” Dash told Tellis.

“Hey, you guys seen 3 fillies around here?” Tellis asked.

(Play: Netsky-Give and take )

“No, you invited fillies to a party? Tellis!”  Twilight yelled at Tellis’s thoughtlessness.

“Well, I got the booze out of here!” Tellis protested.

“Where? Inside of you? You smell like a brewery!” Twilight argued a bit more with Tellis until Fluttershy noticed Scootaloo’s magenta mane bobbing up and down in the ground.

“Guys… I see… hello? Is anypony-, “Fluttershy tried getting the attention of the others, but to no avail.

“There they are!” Dash shouted out as she hovered above the rest.

“Huh? Where?” Twilight and Tellis said simultaneously.

They all went to the opposite end of the room, where they came to the three fillies.

“Cutie Mark Crusaders, party animals!” they all shouted.

“Cute,” Said Tellis.

“Hey, y’all, this here’s a great party!” Applebloom said.

“Yeah, I see why you come to these things, sis!” Sweetie Bell said to Rarity while she danced.

“Sweetie Bell! What in Celestia’s name are you doing here?” Rarity shot the question in a most dramatic way at her sister.

“Well, Tellis invited us here!” Sweetie Bell protested.

“Tellis! How could you?” Rarity swooned around dramatically; spilling her drink on everypony making them complain.

“Well, hehe, I didn’t know she was your sister…” Tellis sheepishly said as he swept the punch off his new jacket and shirt.

“This party is awesome, Rainbow Dash!” Scootaloo called out to her idol.

“Yeah, kid, this really is a great party! Pinkie outdid herself this time!” Rainbow replied to her little friend.

“Thanks!” Pinkie shouted from across the room.

“Hey, y’all, what’s that smell? It smells kinda funny,” Applebloom asked, as she smelled the beer on Tellis’s clothes.

“Aww, don’t worry about it, Applebloom, just dance around, and have some fun!” Tellis called out to  Applebloom as he signaled for all to dance(insert power chord here as they all jump into the air).

The group proceeded to party down until it was late in the night, when everypony had left, except for Tellis, Pinkie, Rainbow, and a passed out Lyra, who lay on the floor, snoring loudly. Seems like she found the booze because she had a six pack plastic on her horn, and there were several empty Budwinner cans next to her.

They helped clean up with Pinkie Pie, all exept for Lyra and rainbow, because Lyra was, well… yeah, and rainbow just gives zero bucks.

“Well, Tellis, you’re cool in my book, well, not as cool as me, but you’re on your way,” Rainbow Dash said to Tellis as she sat on a couch next to Lyra, ‘helping’.

Tellis on the other hoof was sweeping up garbage and other things with Pinkie Pie, who was in charge of the dustpan, said to Dash,” Gee, thanks. You think you might wanna help clean up?”

“No thanks, I’m good,” Dash said as she got into a more relaxed position on the couch, yanked a leftover beer from the plastic rings around Lyra’s head, and started drinking. Lyra slightly stirred as a bit of drool escaped her mouth, but didn’t wake up.

“Yo, Pinkie, you think I could crash here tonight? I mean, I don’t have a house, and I blew all my money on stuff today…” Tellis asked Pinkie Pie after they were done cleaning up.

“Sure, Tellis, it’s the least I cou-Ohh, I shouldn’t have had those twelve beers!” Pinkie called out as she ran to the bathroom.

“Twelve? I thought it was six! Hey, Dash do you remember Pinkie drinking-“Tellis stopped asking Rainbow when he spotted her sleeping, subconsciously curled up with Lyra.

Tellis sighed, then headed over to the loveseat, (for stupid people, that’s the short couch with 2 cushions) laid down on it, and fell asleep.