"For what it's worth, I think you look marvelous," Arcanista said.
"Mrmmmfff..." Rainbow Dash exhaled heavily out her nostrils. She turned from the mirror, fidgeting in a simple brown dress that hung loosely off her lithe figure. "I feel like I'm going to drown in this thing."
"It couldn't be helped," Arcanista said, trotting across the parlor. "You're a rather small pony."
"So everyone keeps telling me." Rainbow's eyes rolled back as she pawed at a green green mane that was pinned up in an unassuming bun. "So... like... does it at least look awesome?"
"It looks fitting for the task you now have at hoof," Arcanista said with a slight smile.
"So, in other words, it's super crazy lame."
Arcanista chuckled slightly. "Those are your words, not mine."
"Ughh..." Rainbow sighed. She tried sitting down, but the brown skirt bunched up too much. Unable to fly either due to her pinned-down wings, she leaned against the mirror and shuddered. "You know, way back in the day, ponies used to compliment me on how nifty it was to have a mane with so much color. Of course, I paid them no mind, 'cuz having a spiffy hairstyle just wasn't my thing. But now? With all of the colors gone and replaced with green?"
"Lemme guess. You miss the way that it was."
"And I never thought it'd get to me, either," Rainbow muttered. A sigh. "So, it's gonna stay like this for good, huh?"
Arcanista shrugged. "It's only a dye, Miss Dash. A rinse or two with water and you should be back to normal."
"For real?" Rainbow blinked. "You think?"
"Indeed," Arcanista uttered with a nod. "Which means that we had better not run into any errant rain storms along the way."
"Do I have to stay inside the coach the whole way?"
"In order to portray a convincing servant to the House of Sehlp, you'll have to hide just about everything about yourself," she said. "Including your wings."
"Er... yeah..."
"Is that going to be a problem?"
"Well, I... I-I just don't think I've ever been on my hooves for as long as we're planning me to be." Rainbow blinked. "Unless you count the time that I had one of my wings horribly injured and Roarke had to dress me up as a cyborg bounty hunter while her best friend healed me under the watch of a giant necrotic spider mare."
Arcanista stared, eyes twitching. "...I beg your pardon?"
"Er... r-right. I keep forgetting how little you know about the Jury's past."
"Sounds like you could write a book on it."
"Or a dozen." Rainbow did a double-take into the mirror. "Dummy. You already made that joke..."
"Well, in any case, I wouldn't fret too much." Arcanista paced over to Rainbow. "Once we're situated beyond the West Gate, you'll be able to use your wings as much as you like."
"Right..."
"We'll be counting on you to get an eye-in-the-sky on the enemy," Arcanista said. "Whoever or whatever they will be."
"Will I be the only thing flying?"
"Huh?"
"Er... is flying tech a thing in Val Roa?"
"Honestly, no." Arcanista shook her head. "Although we are quite prepared to deal with flying forces in the event of an invasion."
Rainbow shuddered. "I know that only t-too well..."
"Oh?"
"Tell me." Rainbow tilted her head up, gazing intently at the Duchess. "Do the Val Roans have... uhm..."
"Yes...?"
Rainbow gulped. "Some sort of... I-I dunno... magical anti-aircraft barrier?"
"I'm afraid I don't quite follow."
"She's talking about the Soul Sentries," spoke a deep voice, entering the room.
Rainbow jolted, then spun about.
Jake was still shaking flecks of brick and plaster off his antlers. "Hidey ho, puke head!"
"Oh look," Rainbow muttered, eyebrows even. "It's the moose."
"Ballerinas!" Jake smirked as he thump thump thump'd into the room. "So you've heard of me!"
"Yeah..." Rainbow frowned, dragging a hoof across the floor. "And I heard of what you almost did to my friends."
Jake shrugged. "So I was in a bug-crushing mood and they got in the way. Can you forgive a moose for having murdered his way through a sea of goblins to get here?"
"Hello, Constable," Arcanista said. "Did you finish beating up my brother?"
"Actually, he just gave me the licking of a lifetime."
"Oh truly?" Arcanista smiled. "So there's still hope for him."
"I wouldn't shake it unless it squirted on its own, Duchy Baby." Jake's beady eyes narrowed. "A piece of Floyd is still there, but he ain't the same he... ain't he?"
"It's a sheer miracle that he arrived here at all, Constable."
"Yeah. Too bad he's committing the nasty sin of forgeting ass-everything."
"Uhhhh..." Rainbow leaned forward with a scowl. "You said something about 'Soul Sentries?'"
"Easy there, pipsqueak. That dress might go off."
"For real! What the hay is that?!"
"They're deer," Jake said. "But no ordinary noblefolk, but honor-driven freakazonkers who give up everything--family, life, title, emotion--just to hone their skills into one thing."
"And what's that?"
"Zapping the God-forsaken Hell out of the sky! That's what! Yeesh!" Jake rolled his eyes, nearly scraping the ceiling with his antlers. "Were you born under a space rock?!"
"In case you haven't noticed, I'm not from around here."
"And in case you haven't noticed, I don't give a mother-fluffing damn!"
"Constable, be kind," Arcanista said. "After all, the three of us will be traveling across country together, plus one 'princess' and pluse one 'Xonan magistrate.'"
"Fine... fine." Jake gave a long, slobbering yawn. "Soul Sentries are--like--the top brassiest of the top brass when it comes to honorable Val Roan defenders. They go through this freaky-deaky ritual thang where they give up their individuality in order to become... like... a walking gun."
"Walking... gun...?"
"And then they're managed by captains of the Defense Ministry to zap any incoming goblin invaders. Or in this case..." She smirked. "A winged pony with boogers for a mane."
Rainbow frowned. "I'll have you know that these souped up 'Soul Sentries' almost brought an end to the Noble Jury!" she spat. "As well as every one of my friends who depends so heavily on magic!"
"Hah! Well, what were you doing flying over the capital?!"
"We werent!" Rainbow snarled. "We were simply trying to fly in over the mountain range! But the crazy energy beams shot us down!"
"No kiddin'?!"
"Dude... like... the barrier of magic surrounds your whole dayum inner kingdom!"
Jake opened his muzzle, but froze. He blinked. "Huh... the whole kingdom, you say?"
"Yeah! Totally!"
Th-Thud! The moose slumped back on his haunches. He inhaled and exhaled deeply.
"Constable?" Arcanista raised an eyebrow. "Is there something you know that you're not telling us?"
'Well, rodeos, Duchy..." Jake's pained muzzle flexed. "You've been stuck here in Bootyful for a long-ass time! You haven't the faintest idea what it's like out there with all of the stuff that's been going on!"
"I imagine that dealing with the goblins has been most harrowing."
"Hell, no!" Jake grinned wide. "That's been super stinkin' fun! I could squish those buggers' eyes out in their sleep!"
"Then what are you referring to?"
"Well, rumor is that the Soul Sentry division of the Ministry has been doubling... quadrupling in size." Jake's hairy brown ears twitched. "I figured it was all on account of the Prince's coronation coming up and all, but that's a bit overkill. I mean... these poor deer saps are giving up their whole lives to become these pew pew rockets... and for what? If I had that many soldiers committed to sky zappage, I'd be preparing for an invasion!" He rubbed his hairy chin cleft. "Or for an invasion."
Rainbow gave him a sharp look. "Did you just say...?"
"I know what it sounds like I said, bird horse." Jake's nostrils flared. "And I'm not liking it any more than you are."
Rainbow fidgeted in her peasant gown. "Maybe... like... you should tell me more about these 'Soul Sentries.'"
"I have a better idea." He glared her way. "You tell us more about them."
"Huh?"
"Just what in the hell did you guy go through up there over the kingdom's border?"
Rainbow sighed long and hard. "I was afraid you were gonna ask that..."
Yes. Yes, you did.
Stop talking to yourself, IC. It's creepy.
These Soul Sentries give me the spooks. I'm reminded of the Tranquil from Dragon Age or the Stalkers from Half Life. I think that's going to be what they're like. And that scares the shit out of me.
5162233
lol, 2 seconds apart.
Story time! So now we know why the barrier is there and why.
5162238 Will there be anypony who won't point this book joke out?
Xonan? Shouldn't it be Val Roan?
"was"
*hue*
Huh...I honestly figured Val Roa would have some kind of flying technology, although the Jury is a special case. Someone refresh my memory - where did the Noble Jury come from again?
"there". Also, *eyetwitch*
"plus"
"Walking guns"....Well, that's not at all spooky. Nope, not at all. With a description like that, I think it's definitely inevitable that we'll be seeing these guys at least on-
...Oh. Well, there it is. But they're definitely gonna be seen in person before this is all over.
Well now, there's an interesting tidbit of information. I wonder which of the aforementioned suspects have control over this ministry? This'll put evidence against whomever does. I'm suspecting Saikano since it's for defense (or invasion), which would be a function of the military, but it's entriely possible that the Sentries are under the jurisdiction of some other branch of the government.
What the what now?
And what's up with constables and being badass?
I see what you did there.
So Jake is a she now?
Hmmm. Okay, so the Soul Sentries have multiplied in numbers. I fear one of two possibilities: Deer are being forced in against their will, or changeling shenanigans. Neither option is very pretty.
Y'know, it never occurred to me how tough it probably is not to repeat jokes over the course of a nearly 2 million word long epic. The fact that I don't recall any repeated jokes (except this one, but that was the point, no?) is pretty impressive.
Easy their jake...Rainbow is not like the others, watch your sass
5162281
Yeah, that last piece of information I found to be particularly disquieting as well. I have a really, really bad feeling about those guys. They're going to creep the hell out of me, I just know it.
5162322
HOW DARE YOU POINT THIS OUT JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T CHANGE GENDERS DOESN'T MEAN JAKE CAN'T GOD CHECK YOUR WHITE CIS PRIVELEGE YOU SCUM AND-
oh, oh god. I'm sorry about that, don't know what came over me. I must be spending too much time on tumblr these days.
I'm... I'm just going to rest now.
Hey, I nickname like that...
I see I'm late to the "already made that joke" party.
goddamnit skirts
5162337
There was an innuendo from Belle and Pilate that I'm pretty sure cropped up multiple times.
SO, we have walking guns? I think I'm getting aroused...
Forty crunches, ):(. Knock 'em out!
Well, Chrysalis really doesn't like the Jury, does she?
Obligatory "Or a dozen." mention goes here.
Soul Sentries? Am I perhaps smelling possible Floydien backstory?
Not diggin jake one bit. Im thinkin once floydien sees this bastion chick he will start to remember. They keep implying parts of old him are their.
5162383
Oh dear... I just thought of something. What if Jake managed to get in a fight with Roarke? I'm not sure Bountiful would survive...
...should I be glad that Floyd's "Nancy Jane" is an earth pony, and not a deer? o.o
...and oh, I'll have you know that green is NOT an awful color! >:/
My guess is that this is a kingdom that has given up on protecting the entire nation.
I like how Jake swears without swearing. Playing with words is fun
Green isn't her color....
Laugh!
Boast Bustrts!
Poor Carrot / Golden.
Hmmm... I wonder what SHE'S up to in Ponyville.
I bet life around that chaos portal is pretty strange.
The best defence is a good offence, and ValRo is getting as offensive as possible. Going to be intresting if the Soul Squad splits, and the extras are sent down south to, enquire about cessetion of incursions by the Cartel. Diplomatically of course. I mean, you cant trade with a fortress.
Im looking at Jake, then the mind programming needed for the Deer Kill, then thinking that Iron Giant has more freewill.
UhOh.. Giving up induviduality, walkng guns.
Soul Sentries are Changeling Borg?
Stop hitting the fourth wall. I'm not sure how much more she can take.
img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130317043412/mlp/images/4/4a/Green_Golden_Harvest_crop_S1E6.png
"Well I never!"
And I expected moose to be protective only of flying squirrels
classicmedia.tv/pr/rockyandbullwinkle/images/art_hero1.jpg
I don't think Rainbow and Jake are the best when it's about stealth.
cdn.duelinganalogs.com/comics/2012-02-04.gif
5162796
It's not a creative color, though.
5163568 I feel the best thing to say right now is...
We had a 4th wall?
When Jake meets Kera the world will shudder,if he meets Roarke,I expect him to turn her straight with his love of destruction that may surpass hers.
5162752
Defense for an invasion... or offense for an invasion.
5162541 I dunno, seems more like they're something that troubles ya Jurist self. But then again, you are like a walking, talking, drill sergeant stereotype.
Mayhaps this is gonna be an interesting talk.
You tell us.
No, you tell us.
5163889
Aieeeeeeeee!!!!!
T-that was an interesting video.....
plot twist
RD survives and wrote these books
thats why there are so many spelling errors
Dat moose...
Why is this all I think of when I imagine his voice?:
"I am the Emperor's weapon, honed with fury."
The title Soul Sentry sounds pretty damn awesome. It helps that people with antlers look pretty damn cool - and very elegant, too! - as it is.
fc02.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/317/3/4/deerman_shaman_by_murielle-d5kymmt.jpg
I mean damn. You're gradually pulling all the awesome cards here.
Oh fuck. Now we have an army of walking guns to eliminate.
Oh boy, happy fun story time! I hope nothing bad happens in it...
5169442 "I am the hammer, I am the right hand of the Emperor, the instrument of His will, the gauntlet about His fist, the tip of His spear and the edge of His sword. I am the end!"
5166087
That nearly killed me. My fucking sides.
Soul Sentries. Not good at all.
-Spirit
So monks who shoot magic-canceling beams that mess everything up are who are protecting Val Roa. This isn't going to be a very easy task if they get called to do anything inside the city.
Ya know, if the Noble Jury happened to stumble upon an area that they could all just wander around and mingle in, it would be strange to overhear one of their conversations. Just imagine walking around and then just somewhere off to your side you hear:
Suddenly youre probably going to do a double take and think 'looks like the looney bin missed a couple'. I imagine it would be pretty damn funny though.
Much like a Sergeant Major, underneath the gruff exterior is a very intelligent individual. you can see he became a captain for more than just his combat prowess.
Walking gun deer, eh?
5162233 And if the joke is made again I will still chuckle. It might get old after a dozen times though...
Dashie are u gaining self awareness
FOOOOOOOURTH WAAAAAAAAY LL!!! *CRASH!*
She's breaking the fourth wall!!!
Alright, let's find out what the hell happened on the first go around.