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Laichonious
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Joined March 2012
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41w, 3dThe Writer's Group
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53w, 14hMSC Bronies
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37w, 4dAlternate Perspectives
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Exodus
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Footsteps echoed down the long makeshift hall. The air was dry and dusty, but what more would you expect from an old warehouse? A man of average height and in his late thirties passed through little pools of light from the large lamps bolted to the steel rafters of the warehouse. Cereal didn’t like the building, but it was the only one they could get after their original headquarters was nearly demolished by a flash hate mob. He shook his head. Why do they hate us? he asked for probably the millionth time, We aren’t hurting anyone, we just wanted to have fun. Why do they want to destroy that? The sound of hooves striking the smooth concrete floor joined the soft thud of Cereal’s shoes.
“Everything all set?” a yellow unicorn with a red spiked mane trotted next to him.
“Yep.” Cereal said, “Rent is paid on the building for five years, after that it’s being demolished. Is everypony here?”
Seth, the yellow pony, nodded. “We just finished roll call, everypony is accounted for and waiting for us in the Acclimation Chamber.” He paused and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, “I almost can’t believe it’s actually happening. Two years of planning and coordination and the day is finally here.”
Cereal grunted in agreement, rubbing the side of his head. He took a long look at his hand, flexing it repeatedly. He had volunteered to be the last one to undergo the transformation, after all, they needed someone to put their affairs in order before they left. Two years ago the staff at Equestria Daily made the fateful decision to leave Earth. Their trans-dimensional portal had been working for a year before that and they had the Pony-o-matic doing permanent transformations a few months before. The sacking of EQD headquarters was the trigger for that decision. Other sites had started going down as the hatred grew, almost out of nowhere. EQD.com valiantly stayed online and as far as he knew, it was the only pony site left on the net. It wasn’t active anymore, they posted the general exodus proposal and some of the steps to get into contact with them, and then froze it on a protected server, hidden away with some brony sympathizers. To an outsider the instructions wouldn’t make sense, according to design. Only a true brony would understand the cypher and know where to go.
For two years, the bronies gathered in this abandoned industrial park. They had begun transformations almost immediately; there had to be almost three thousand ponies here. It made him worry that some didn’t understand the cypher in their last post on EQD, there should have been a lot more of them here. Then again, the fandom wasn’t what it used to be. The hate and stigma imposed by society had shaken many bronies out of the community. The ones who stuck with it were ponies from all over the world, united in their desire to find someplace safe.
“Okay, let’s go through the final checklist,” Cereal reached into the yellow unicorn’s saddle bags and pulled out a clipboard.
“I can’t wait for my magic to work...” Seth muttered.
“So, you have the archive carts loaded right?”
“Yes, we have all of the data banks from the pony sites, computers and generators.”
“Printers and ink?”
“Check”
“Paper archive binders?”
“Check”
“Medical references?”
“Check”
“Historical references?”
“Check”
“Tents, water, rations, medicine?”
“Check, check, check, check.”
Cereal put the clipboard and checklist back in Seth’s saddle bags. “You’d make Twilight proud. Now--” suddenly they were joined by a white pegasus mare.
“Hey, slow-pokes what’s the holdup?” she tossed her bright pink mane.
“Just going over some last-minute checks,” Seth replied.
“Well some of the other ponies are getting antsy. They’ve brought up some good questions. Like, do we know what the sudden infusion of several thousand males would do to the Equestrian population? Are we certain there aren’t any endemics we carry? Do we take any human medicines or can we just use equine medicines? A lot of them don’t know if this is the best thing to do.”
Cereal sighed, “We’ve been through this, Phoe... we don’t really know. It seems like the population of Equestria is over saturated with females anyway so there shouldn’t be a problem, unless you count rapid growth as one... And we just can’t stay here any longer, we sealed our fate the moment we started transforming humans into ponies. This world doesn’t want us here, our only hope is in Equestria,” he shoved his hands into the pockets of his blue jeans and shrugged.
It really was a shame that the rest of the world didn’t want them here. He was sure that all of the bronies felt the same way, why did society try to pull down something so good? They had always been a positive influence on the internet, well with the exception of a few. They raised millions, maybe even billions, of dollars for charities and other good causes. They were rewarded with hate and scorn. He shook his head again, what a mad world indeed.
“All around me are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces,” he started to sing with with his best Gary Jules impression.
“Bright and early for their daily races, going nowhere, going nowhere,” Seth continued.
“Their tears are filling up their glasses, no expression, no expression,” Phoe sang.
“Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow, no tomorrow, no tomorrow,” Cereal took his turn.
Then all three in unison, “And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad, the dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had. I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take, when people run in circles it’s a very, very...Mad world...Mad world.”
The last notes of the sorrowful song gently echoed in the large building. “I didn’t know you sang, Cereal.” Phoe turned her head and eyed him with a little smile.
Cereal smiled back, “Neither did I.” They had reached their destination; a small room sectioned off from the rest of the warehouse by flimsy plywood walls. The transformation room, Cereal took a steadying breath. “Seth, go get everypony gathered in the portal area, take a final count, I don’t want anypony left behind.” he looked at the strange contraption that filled up most of the little room, “Phoe, would you like to do the honors?”
“Sure thing, boss,” Phoe took her place behind the control panel of the machine as Seth galloped off to do his assignment.
Cereal entered the chamber, the segmented steel walls slid shut, he quickly disrobed and threw the clothes over the side. “Ready!” he called over the low humm of the device.
“Initiating in 3...2...1...NOW!” Phoe called.
The machine charged up to full power in less than a second, emitting a high pitched whine. Cereal had no chance to really prepare for it, a blinding white light and the sound of rushing water drowned out the whole world...When he came to, he was lying on the floor of the small room, his head propped up on a pillow. Phoe smiled at him, “Welcome to your new life, Cereal Velocity.”
Twenty minutes later, Cereal stood in front of a large multi colored crowd of eager ponies. He felt much better now that he had finally joined them. Standing was pretty much all he could do at the moment, he was still getting used to his new body, a light gray unicorn.
“Calculations are set, cap’n, she’s warmin up an’ she’ll be ready teh go in ten minutes.” Seth said in a rather horrid impression of Scotty.
“Yer, doin’ it wrong!” a true Scottish pony called from the front row of the crowd. Seth just waved a hoof at him and laughed.
“How long can we hold the portal open?” Cereal asked.
“At the most...two hours. Any longer and we run the risk of overloading the transformers, not to mention the power grid. The electric company would probably cut service before that happened though.” Seth replied.
“Everypony has a buddy and they are all organized into groups,” Phoe gestured to the crowd, “We should be able to get all of them through in the first hour.”
Cereal nodded, “Can you bring me a mic?” It was peptalk time. Seth returned with a mic attached to a stand, held in his mouth. He put it down in front of Cereal and flipped the switch. “Ahem! Attention everypony.” Cereal’s voice echoed over the crowd, they all hushed and looked at him expectantly.
“The day is here, our exodus from this world.” he said solemnly. The grey unicorn imagined it looked very impressive, the massive stargate-esque construction standing behind him, glowing with electric lights and slowly turning, his voice echoing in the massive building. “Some of us are leaving friends and family behind, others came here seeking friends and family. This world cannot accept our love or tolerance and it refuses to love and tolerate us. So we go to a better place! Are you ready my friends?!”
A loud huzzah! exploded from the crowd followed by “FOR EQUESTRIA!” Another shout came from a few others, “FOR THE EMPIRE!” answered by, “FOR THE REPUBLIC!” from the other side of the crowd.
Cereal looked to his companions, they shouted into the microphone, “FOR THE HERD!!”
The crowd answered with a deafening “FOR THE HERD!!”
“Hit it Seth!” Phoe shouted over the crowd. Seth galloped to the controls and slammed a hoof into a large red button.
The portal growled to life, the sounds of metal grating against metal and small spurts of plasma jumping from the edges of the ring. It spun faster and faster, wind swirling around it as it gained speed.
“50 percent!” Seth yelled from the readout on the panel.
The three ponies on the platform in front of the portal machine ducked their heads into the rising wind, the crowd doing the same. Lightning flashed inside and along the rapidly spinning ring. The air inside ionized and the distinctive smell of ozone filled the building.
“80 percent!” Seth shouted to be heard over the cacophony of the machine.
“Everypony, get ready to run!” Cereal shouted into the microphone.
The space inside the machine started to warp as if a giant magnifying glass were being pulled away from them. The image of the wall behind the machine distorted and finally flipped upside down, then shrank, leaving a blinding white light at the edges that grew with every passing second.
“90 percent!” Cereal could barely hear him.
A few seconds later a low rumble shook the ground, rising in pitch until Cereal could feel the air in his lungs start to vibrate. With what he imagined would be the sound of God’s whip, the portal ripped open a hole in the fabric of time and space. The image of a brightly colored meadow at midnight seemed to fall towards them, coming into focus and filling the large ring of the portal.
“RAMPS!” Phoe shouted to the first line of ponies. They quickly ducked under harnesses and hoisted the large ramps next to them in a practiced motion. They trotted up the large metal ramp and through the portal. Within seconds the ramps were assembled together and put into place. “GO, GO, GO!” Phoe shouted into the microphone. she suited her words and ran into the portal, laughing. Seth was only a few steps behind whooping at the top of his lungs. Cereal ran awkwardly after them just ahead of the advancing column of ponies pulling carts laden with supplies. He passed through the invisible barrier of the portal, the hair of his coat standing on end. It felt like jumping into icy water and passing through a dry desert at the same time. There was no sound, his ears rang with the sudden silence. He could feel a sort of tugging at his middle, much like the sensation of going down a rollercoaster’s first drop.
Suddenly he was across the portal and tripping down the wooden ramp. The ponies that had taken the ramp through came to his aid, helping him down the rest of the way. He thanked them and made his way over to where Phoe stood gazing at the night sky.
“This is it! We’re really here, Cereal! I don’t recognize any of the constellations and this sky can only be the work of Luna!”
Seth was rolling in the grass giggling hysterically. Cereal laughed, tears coming to his eyes. The ponies from Earth started coming through the portal in droves. Each group that came through went to a predetermined area after clearing the ramp. The whole operation was going like clockwork. The group leaders started organizing their members and began their tasks.
“We’re home,” he whispered, “Finally home.”
Comments ( 268 )
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Only eight seasons? That's it? There is bound to be at least 15 . . . and then a reboot.
Hmmm I will read and track this (because I brok my ankle and I need some fics to occupy me)
Image: http://images.memegenerator.net/instances/500x/9538342.jpg
Inb4 Brony international guard reference.
I like the idea of a crusade thing going on, that was a very lucrative time for history in the wold of fiction and whatnot (see: Templars) but the only reason I did not like those times was the stupid amount of people that refused to even lie about their religious nature to survive. Or am I missing the point?
Aherm, idiotic ranting aside I shall read this.
Image: http://cdn2.mamapop.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/dis_gonna_b_gud.gif
*modestly sips at a can of root beer*
"The air inside ionized and the distinctive smell of ozone filled the building."
Hurk?!? *spews soda* PPPPPPPPPPPHHTTTTTT!!!
*cough* *cough* OZONE?!? O₃ is a poisonous gas!!
~~~~~~
That all said I LOVE THIS!! Great ideas do come in the spur of the moment! Originality is the best policy!
>Post new story
>Say it's a side project until your other story is done, and will continue if it's popular
>New story has over 5x the amount of likes as your other story in an hour
lawl
I am intrigued by this concept, and shall be watching this.
EDIT: and featured to boot =P
Well, look at that.
I just happened to be glancing down the front page and noticed something mentioning my fic, Shipping and Handling.
To be perfectly fair, I didn't make up the Portal to Equestria thing, everything I used concerning EQD in chapter 10 is pre-existing "Equestria Daily lore" invented by Seth and Cereal.
Here's Cereal Velocity's actual video from "Equestrian Innovation's Portal to Equestria Project".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvTRKmjVUWY
Presumably, the portal from that clip got working well enough to send Seth to Equestria before shutting down again.
So "Conversion Bureau" meets "Stargate" meets the EqD-Staff? Not oooverly original but I like it. [+1 thumb]
Only thing that makes me wonder: If there is a Anti-Brony-Movement, I'd make sure they never ever, ever, ever, ever find the GATE. Some dead-mans-hand device that destroys the ring, burns out the drives that had the program and the space-time coordinates for equestria and then fillsthe sub-basements with cement. Just to be sure, you know.
A "Goodbye and thanks for all the apples" would have been classy as well.
LOL in the face of Snape, how could I?
Wow, you hit it on the nose there dude. That is the underlying message I guess, don't let go of what is really important and good. To me, that's what this community is all about.
yeah, 8 seasons does seem to be kind of a thing...I rolled with it
I'm with yah. I've thought more about what I wrote, I have to do this sometimes for I write good ideas way faster than I think them, and I would agree that it would be a bittersweet departure. You know you are going to a better place but it sucks to leave everything you know behind.
Will do.
This is an amazing turn out guys. I didn't think this would get so much attention, seeing as how 'bronies go to equestria' is quite the popular strand to go on. I was half expecting "cliched plot is cliched" but got all of this instead. It gives me this warm glowey feeling inside...I like it
really?! that's cool, I saw it in your fic first, then again I'm new to the herd, been a brony for only 4 weeks now, so there is a lot of fandom lore and jokes that I don't know yet. Thanks for the info, will credit were it's due
yeah, the facts are muddy, this totally fell out of my head in like three hours so there's bound to be holes in it. There was a violent backlash in which several people were hurt, not killed. I think I will elaborate on that in the next chapter though
IKR?
it's funny you mention that, I thought about that too, but then I thought; no there might be stragglers. They would want to get as many bronies to the other side as wanted to go. also, ominous foreshadowing?
OHGOD! What if an anti-brony group goes into Equestrian to....to....DESTROY IT?
Clearly, neither are the specifics and nuances of the English language. Eh.
Anyways, color me intrigued. If you can up your writing abilities, and keep this going for a long while, consider yourself damned to the tenth circle of hell; that is, my faves list and a review with some criticism.
Good luck~
I don't think its all that surprising for it to get this much attention.
I think one of the things that let it stand out is the uniqueness of the story.
First you got a massive number of bronies, usually a BiE story has only one brony.
Second you have considered the ramifications of the exodus to it's full extent. It can only get more interesting.
Third BNG was a great one shot. and it brought forth a very attractive idea, what would it be like if a ton of bronies just kinda appeared in equestria one day? These bronies have been ponyfied so there is a difference and honestly I really am lookin forward to this. if you are unconvinced then refer to my previous comment above.
Image: http://troll.me/images/high-expectations-asian-father/there-is-much-to-live-up-to-do-not-disappoint-thumb.jpgAsian Father is waiting for update. Do not disappoint, or you get chopstick up ass.
HAHAHAHAHA
That's a good one. No, there's no trolling here. Unless, I'm the one getting trolled by all the views...this is just crazy! I never thought anyone would like my writing this much, I mean, sure I've been writing for a while...but honestly I'm not as good as a LOT of the other writers on here. This is actually really humbling. So, in light of all this support I will have to continue this story. I have several Ideas for it and I want to keep it light hearted and fun, maybe with some drama thrown in now and then.
I'm really new to the whole fanfic thing, I've been working on a fantasy epic, of my own making, for almost eight years, and a Scifi satire for a year or two.
Seriously, this has got to be the best community on the whole internet.
Should I read this,..?
Image: http://www.myfacewhen.net/uploads/719-well-why-the-fuck-not.jpg
Man... always wanted to go to Equestria, i feel bad for the bronies who couldnt get there though 
If there is a transdimensional portal that apparently leads to Equestria, i shall courageously yell SAAXXTOOOONN.... HAAAAAAAAAALEEEEEEEEEE!!!! and charge through the portal. Anypony else have this feeling (Leeroy Jenkins or Hale is fine 
Thank you, I looked it up and yes, we are right. Ozone can indeed be deadly but it's gotta have a pretty high concentration. The smell is very distinctive and doesn't require a high concentration for it to be noticed.
Looking forward to the critique! I love critiques, as long as they are constructive (obviously) I don't mind if someone doesn't like something I do, on the inverse, I appreciate it when people take the time to say why they like something. This whole experience is a big boost to my confidence. More confidence means faster writing and better stories. And that translates to more fun for everyone involved.
Haven't read this yet, (added to read later), but technically it is a human in Equestria story. While I don't like the designation because it seems misleading to me, it seems the fandom has decided that if a human is turned into a pony and brought to Equestria it is indeed a human in Equestria story.
But really, you don't need the tag, the story is pretty clear.
Please, for the love of God, Montresor.... No more "confidence" bullshit. 
Confidence is all well and good, but sacrificing story quality and editing for the sake of speed is an inexcuseable offense, in my opinion. Plus, confidence does not necessarily indicate ability. Just breath deep, and take it slow, kiddo.
Please, don't let all the attention go to your head. Just because you've gained a large amount of attention does not mean that you are 20% cooler than the rest of your brethren. I do like the concept behind this story, but that does not mean your execution is as great as it can be.
I know I sound like a jackass, and I don't care, but I'd prefer it if you'd keep what I've said in mind. Humility is a virtue, and all that.
Anyways, keep on writing~
*shrugs* Partially I'm just doing my job, but I hate to see new writers get their egos stroked too much. Anyway, I think that if you can stay original, not rush things, and find yourself a decent proofreader or two, you'll do quite well for yourself here.
Oh, and if your ego gets too inflated, give me a call. I love hearing the "pbblblblbllblblblbllblblt" sound that comes from a popped ego. XD
Good luck on Chapter Two~
Oh my. I'm sensing that something will definitely go wrong. You don't just leave behind a nice portal like that. Someone's bound to find that and then all Hell will break loose. (Literally or figuratively, your pick.) I'm looking forward to this. Knowing how humans work, they're bound to screw this up somehow. I just hope the universe doesn't collapse with it.
ONLY 8 seasons? But in any case, the real message...
*clears throat*
IN THE NAME OF HIS UNHOLINESS, CTHULHU...
Image: http://www.andysowards.com/blog/assets/CTHULHU_by_reau.jpg...THIS SHALL CONTINUE, OR THY PLANET SHALL BE DEVOURED. CTHULHU FHTAGN.
Reading because STARGATE!
Image: http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/a/w/awwyeahplz.pngI have some problems with your tense changes. For example:
"it was the pony site left on the net. It isn't active anymore"
Also, I think you missed the word "only" there 
Image: http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/212/587/2667328774161692252111104.gifyou can have all my moustaches!
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