Armies clash in Equestria over an ancient feud between two powerful races. Ajax, the last human, holds Celestia accountable for the extinction of his race. He will go to any lengths to see her brought to justice, but something darker lurks beneath the war torn surface. He is seen as one of the worst creatures to ever walk Equestria, but are humans truly damned to being monsters or are they capable of something greater.
I did not write this it was written by a great and awesome friend of mine
Chapters (15)
Log Date 7/Aug/2014:
Quatertech Spike has stumbled apon a story, it seems to be awesome despite no investigation into the subject. I will request further examination to find out if it really is epic or it is another life less planet in our galaxy
---Captain Botaglove of the starship Celestia
Has good potential. Keep it up
Something tells me his going to open the gates of Tartarus.
4814737 That's what I hope.
Although I could do without Trixie (my most hated character EVAR!!)
Ajax, the last human, unfortunately named after a bathroom cleaner (which led to his being the butt of many janitorial-themed jokes) fell at last when Celestia suggested that, as an avenging hero, he was "attempting to take a bite out of grime".
The final terrible pun killed him instantly.
is that the cover to the Ra album critical mass?
4816351
It is from the movie Sunshine.
4816425 http://loudwire.com/ra-critical-mass-exclusive-album-stream/
IF fighting is sure to result in victory then you MUST fight!
Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say that he knows a little more about fighting than you do pal because he invented it!
we came to start a war…not end it!
Ajax only wants to start the war and not end it?
4820241
I changed that line in order to more clearly convey what I was trying to get across.
Tell me what you think?
4820689 Ok. Now I see.
Test the Crystal Princess and start a war.
4820746
Because his ultimate goal is to defeat Celestia so he wants to see what her allies are capable of. He knows nothing about the Crystal Princess because she only recently came into power.
4820938 Oh.
i hope he kills celestia i never really liked her anyway but this just maid me dislike her even more and i would love to see her head on a spike
its not enough
i want more
GIVE ME MORE!!
4826797
New chapter this Friday. Then a new chapter every alternating Friday after that.
4826860 yay!
4826440 I didn't hate Celestia at first but as the series went on I was beginning to question her competence starting with the Season 2 opening, then the Changeling Invasion happening and I begin to dislike her, cue to Season 4 opening flashback and I think of her as a terrible sister(please tell me I'm not the only one who thinks so). As of the finale, it was official that she was an incompetent and arrogant ruler.
Cheating fucking scumbag ponys and their stupid magic
damn it if only he had longer ranged weapons i would have loved for him to knock celestia off her high and mighty ass and whats this about a second draconiqus
things are getting really interesting
i cant wait to see more keep up the good work
Man, I REALLY want Ajax to kick their ass and show them that us humans are the most badass motherfuckers ever!
Oh my god this chapter was awesome I can't wait for the next I hope there's a lot of action and fire and EXPOLOTIONS !
your doing an awesome job with this story so far but something about the dream with Luna and ajax seems familiar. Hmmmmmmm picks up notebook OK where is it oh hear it is. Chapter labled The Nightmare Of The Reaper. ...........damn it can't do that anymore so I guess I'll just scrap that chapter. Now back to what I was saying ahem clears throat I WANT MORE!!
4924782
Don't scrap your chapter
.
Everyone writes things differently so just cause I wrote about a dream doesn't mean your idea wouldn't have a different approach.
I guess great minds think alike huh?
4924823 but the way mine is written makes it sound like Im ripping off your chapter there is even as part where Marcus dose the samething that Ajax did when her rose out of the blood and Luna was stitched to a bunch of dead bodies I'm not kidding those parts are almost exactly the same
4924859
Wow, that's interesting.
It's not rare for things to be similar, but its very rare for things to be exactly the same.
I still think you should publish the chapter, but it's ultimately up to you.
4924872 ah screw it I'll publish it but I swear if someone says I ripped you off
This is an interesting story that could use a few more runs through proof reading, especially your quotation marks. You have the tendency to forget to include them. You also have a few paragraphs where the speaker is ambiguous and unclear until you read that line and the next one a few times. The main plot still has me focused on the story and kind of wanting the bad guy to win. I don't like Celestia in this. Can we have her die and Luna take over?
4926385
Thank you for your comment. I will take that into consideration for the next chapter
I can't be the only one who thinks that J.A.X.-002 has an uncanny resemblance to a certain Chinese killing war machine
th03.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/i/2013/253/a/5/liberty_prime_is_online_by_esuerc-d6lrtj6.jpg
4926748 LIBERTY PRIME FTW!
Dust to dust. Hmmm now let me ask if that was a reference to the Thousand Sons?
I like the premise of this story, but there are a few gripes I have about it. You should make it clearer who said the previous line of text. There are some lines I STILL don't know who said what. It's still coherent but it's jarring. As well, there should be some indicator of a change in scene. Going from Canterlot Castle to frozen wasteland with only an empty line between really confuses the reader before they catch on. I would suggest a dotted line or some other line divider to break up the scenes.
4930513
I think I fixed that problem for chapter 3 and above, but I should take the time to go back and add a line of space for scene transitions for the first two chapters.
Great story so far but please don't kill the mane six or spike or the other royals well except blue blood he's a dick to everypony. Let the general try to take on ajax and actually get a deadly blow in before he dies I just know that's where u are gonna go. Uknow what would be cool is if the spirits of all the humans came back and attacked ajax, by Trixie summoning them from their graves, turning on ajax in the end.
ok i know im usally on Ajaxes side but iv got to say this LUNA IS A MOTHERFUCKIN BADASS!!
i cant wait for the next chapter oh and dear good discord is actually fighting this is awsome
but dont get me wrong i still want Ajax to win
This is a great story, brilliant. But I am getting a strong feeling that the end is approaching, so...
I swear to fucking god is the ponies win and finish off the humans through some bull shit deus ex machinina, then heads will roll because there is no fucking way they can win, it's statistically impossible
Sorry, had to get that out of my system!
I look forwards to more
-Hatty Hattington-
Bring on next chapter kick ass so far.
Just finished. Good so far!
I hope that either Alex will get his revenge, or Celestia will experience the same loss as Alex did when all his friends died.
.
...........no words ..........can expresss.........this chapter excepte for one................AWSOME
this was the best chapter so far i give it a 100/10 it was that good you have still managed to entertain and amuse me you story truly is a master peace and i really mean that and now i will end my comment with a rant -ahem clears throat- GODDAMN YOU CHANGLING QUEEN I HOPE YOU CHOKE ON THE PONIES YOU TOOK OR BETTER YET I HOPE PANDORA PRIM JUST SMASHES YOU IN TO A THIN GREEN PASTE!
. now for some sadness JAX 4 NOOOOO YOU WERE BEST ROBOT 
and as for Ajax i hope he recovers and kills everyone
5031536
Don't be so sure dude. I would rather wait for the next chapter.
Umm, are they going to kidnap Fluttershy, Zecora, or OC pony?
Also, I kind of have to side with Ajax. Wasn't the whole point of the deal that Celestia make sure the humans didn't kill themselves off? Technically by not interfering and allowing them to kill themselves, if they actually did that, she broke the deal they made.
Eh, I don't really understand Chrysalis at all. I think that's the point but it seems kind of stupid to me. If he lived, he's going to basically go on a genocidal rampage against your people. Along with that is the knowledge that no other nation will care to defend you because they'll just assume you suffer from Chronic Backstabbing Disorder (Warning TVtropes link)
<<<<WARNING SPOILERS>>>
The deal was that she would spare the human race, she claims that since the humans fought amongst themselves she isn't at fault. Since she was only supposed to spare the race rather than to watch over/guide them.
Ajax however won't buy the theory that his race just happened kill each other off, it sounds to him like a convenient excuse Celestia made up on the spot.
Chrysalis bet on the fact that if her changeling army evacuated the remaining forces of Canterlot would come to Celestia's aid, guaranteeing Ajax's death on the battlefield.
Other questions will be answered deeper into the story.
Interesting... I would like to see how this one pans out then...
dose anyone else think Ajax is alot like Raime from dark souls 2?