• Published 30th Oct 2011
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Total Magic Pony Island - Tailslover13

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Episode 5: Griffon A Brawl-Off

Discord: Last time, on Total Magic Pony Island: I snuck out in the middle of the night and changed the weather from “cloudy” to “chocolate rain” in Ponyville! Oh, and the campers that are taking part in my totally evil show played a little game, too. The dysfunctional team that is the Magical Misfits fell into an early hole due to their constant fighting and disagreements on…well, let’s face it, disagreements on everything under the sun. The Royal Ruffians seemed to be able to do no wrong, even after getting blown up by some of my food bombs! Taking after her big sister, Apple Bloom pulled her team together and brought them back from the bowels of defeat. However, in the end, the Ruffians STILL finished before them. Sadly, Sweetie Belle ended up breaking a chicken egg and missing out on the quota, leading to the shocked Misfits getting their first win. At the elimination ceremony, Diamond Tiara was seen as the meanest teammate, but Sweetie Belle was still kicked out due to ultimately being the one who cost them the win. This begs to question a very interesting notion: do you eliminate those who cost you wins, or do you get rid of those who have attitude problems? So far, it seems the teams are intent on keeping their stronger players, but how long will this last? With each team now with nine campers, who will take the advantage next? Find out right now, on Total…Magic…Pony…Island!

*the opening theme song showing all 20 contestants plays a moment later before the episode*

“What’s this piece that looks like a pony called again?” Luna asked, nudging a chess piece with her nose as she glanced over at the other side of the table at her patient sister.

“It’s a knight, dear sister,” Celestia said for the sixth time, “Take your time; this is a complex game and it takes a while to get used to. But, it really does help take your mind off other certain things. It helps calm your mind and it lets you take your emotions out in a game and not on anypony else.”

“Yes, big sister, I heard you the first time,” Luna muttered, rubbing her lower lip with her left hoof as she looked down at the makeshift chessboard, “Hmm…let me think about this…”

A day had passed since the last challenge and the Royal Ruffians’ first elimination ceremony. Discord was mostly causing mischief around camp, such as emptying buckets of water on random campers’ heads, using lightning bolts to scare campers to death, use illusion tricks on the campers to make them think that he had done something to their hair, and put rubber snakes in all of their beds. Easy to say, the annoyed campers were always on their toes or hooves and looking out for the rotten draconequus. Nightmare Moon mostly kept to herself, but her cooking was below par and always caused a lot of campers to go hungry whenever they were served her food, mostly due to them choosing to fast over actually eating what was on their plates, save for Pinkie Pie.

At the moment, all 18 remaining Equestrians were walking around the camp and doing their own things. Celestia was teaching her sister Luna how to play chess, since the moon princess had been gone for so very long that she wasn’t accustomed to everyday games. The two princesses were sitting across from each other in the mess hall, with Luna naturally playing with the black pieces and Celestia playing with the white. They had only taken two moves apiece so far, but somehow Celestia was keeping her patience in check while her sister got used to the game.

“Can I move here?” Luna asked, moving one of her two knights forward five spaces and knocking one of her sister’s pawns off the board and onto the floor.

“No, Luna, you can’t,” Celestia sighed, reaching down to retrieve her pawn, grumbling to herself at how horrible it felt to not use magic.

“I declare that I be kinged!” Luna exclaimed, proudly moving one of her bishops a moment later and taking out Celestia’s king.

“What?!?! Sister, first off, there is no ‘being kinged’ in chess!” Celestia growled, slowly losing her patience, “Second, that move isn’t allowed. Third, you cannot move two pieces on one turn.”

“You know, dear sister?” Luna smiled, picking up one of her knights again, “This little piece holds a striking resemblance to me. Are you sure that this game wasn’t created with me in mind?”

“Yes, I’m SURE, Luna,” Celestia said through gritted teeth, “Now, please put the knight down so we can try to continue on before somepony does something they might…”

“Observe!” Luna cried, carefully setting her two knights on top of her horn, “There are now three Luna ponies! You are outmatched, dear sister!” She smiled innocently over at Celestia, who finally snapped at her sister’s foolishness.

“ENOUGH! I CANNOT PLAY WITH YOU ANY LONGER!” Celestia snapped, flipping over the board with her horn and angrily stomping out of the mess hall, “TWILIGHT SPARKLE, MY DEAR STUDENT, I REQUIRE YOUR ATTENTION IMMEDIATELY!” She didn’t notice Luna grinning from behind her.

Luna: *giggling playfully* I recall somepony telling me that if you or your opponent flips over the board, they forfeit. So, I just defeated my sister at chess. *she snuggles the two knights that she had taken from the chess set* I still think you two look like my clones, though.

“Now, girls, I have come up with a foolproof plan on how to bring out the best of all of us,” Twilight smiled, proudly holding her head high as she displayed a chart to her team, “After studying all of our strengths and weaknesses, I compiled my findings into a lot of important data that I think you’ll find…”

“Excuse me, but the Great and Powerful Trixie does not HAVE any weaknesses,” Trixie sniffed, putting her nose in the air and turning away, “You obviously are talking about yourself, Twilight Sparkle, since your flaws have been quite apparent in our first two challenges.”

“…you’ll find that we can learn from each other and become a great team,” Twilight finished, although not as happy and excited as she had started off, “So, if you all would please direct your attention to my graph, I’ll take any questions that you might have. Yes, Gilda?”

“Yeah, I got a question alright,” Gilda smirked, putting her arm down, “Why are you such a dweeb?”

“…are there any SERIOUS questions?” Twilight sighed, running a hoof through her mane to try and keep herself calm, “Yes, Cheerilee?”

“Personally, Twilight, I love your graph and it makes perfect sense,” the teacher smiled, “I fully agree that each of us has certain unique strengths that, when used properly, will assure us of always being in every challenge. I really love how you divided us up into groups as well and were honest with your opinions. After all, you cannot learn anything without criticism.”

“Wait a minute…I’m too hyper?” Scootaloo gasped, looking at Twilight’s graph and frowning, “Hey, I resent that! Gilda is the hyper one, not me!”

“I’m a ditzy pony and should be used carefully?” Derpy asked, tilting her head and rolling her eyes around crazily, “So…how carefully? Does that mean I could break into pieces if I crash into a tree?”

“Twilight, I must protest against what you say about me as well,” Rarity sniffed, “I am not picky about what I do; I am only worried about what might befall my beautiful mane and fur if we should get into something dirty and disgusting.”

“Trixie’s ego does NOT get in the way of her true potential!” Trixie said angrily after finally taking a gander at Twilight’s graph, “How DARE you even suggest such a horrid thing!”

“This is boring; I’m outta here,” Gilda grunted, getting up and stretching her wings and not even bothering to look at what Twilight said about her.

“Twilight, Twilight, you forgot to mention that I can sing!” Pinkie said, “Ooh, and you forgot that I can bake really well…and you forgot many things…in fact, you listed only my faults…why did you do that?”

“Twilight, can I please go use the outhouse?” Apple Bloom asked, raising her hoof while whimpering with her hind legs crossed.

Twilight: *hitting her head against the confessional wall over and over again, until her horn gets stuck in the wood* Why do I even bother? It’s like talking to a wall…no, a bunch of walls! *she sighs and tries to pull her horn loose, but it’s stuck* Why…why…WHY ME? *she feels like screaming*

Cheerilee: Poor Twilight. The dear is really trying, but…even I must admit that this team is…far from extraordinary. But, like I tell my students, you must take a negative and turn it into a positive! Trixie has already asked me to help her out, so I’ll be helping Twilight with this team, too!

“Rainbow Dash, where are ya?” Applejack called out, trotting through the forest and trying to locate her friend, “We really should be workin’ on tryin’ to better ourselves as a team instead of goofin’ off! Rainbow Dash, answer me!”

“Yo, AJ, keep it down, will ya?” Rainbow’s voice rang out from somewhere above the cowgirl’s head, “I’m trying to get some sleep.” Applejack peered up into the sky, shielding her eyes from the sun and frowning as she managed to spot Rainbow’s tail poking lazily over the side of a low cloud that was nearly touching the treetops.

“Sleepin’ on the job? Ah should’a known,” Applejack frowned, sitting down on her tush and crossing her front legs as she glared up at the cloud, “Rainbow Dash, ah’m givin’ ya’ll to the count of five to get your rear down here before ah come up there and drag ya down mahself!”

“Yeah, I’d like to see that!” Rainbow Dash grinned, idly glancing over the side of her cloud and giving the cowpony a wink, “Cut me some slack, would ya? Spike snored all night, not to mention he drove me crazy by sleep-talking about Rarity the entire time when he WASN’T snoring. I’m totally bushed! A hard-working Pegasus like myself needs her rest.”

“Hard-workin’ mah bum!” Applejack snapped, lowering her hat slightly as she continued to glare up at the Pegasus, “None of us got that much sleep thanks to Spike, but ya’ll don’t see US whinin’ about it! Now, get down here this instant so we can train for our next challenge…whatever it may be.”

“No!” Rainbow Dash huffed, stubbornly crossing her arms and turning away from Applejack.

“Rainbow Dash, ah’m not playin’ around here…” Applejack warned, “Ah’m now countin’ to five, and once ah get to five, ya’ll best be down here! One…two…three…four…FIVE!” Up on the cloud, Rainbow Dash had pretended to be sleeping, loudly snoring just to mock and tease Applejack as she continued to ignore her. With a slight smirk, Applejack shook her head and got out a lasso.

Applejack: Hey, ya’ll heard me; ah DID warn her. It’s not mah fault that that little Pegasus can’t get her booty movin’ unless it’s roughed up a bit. *she grins a bit* Besides, ah do love some fun now and then with Dash; she’s not a bad pony or anythin’ like that. She’s just lazier than a turtle, that’s all.

“Okay, ya varmint, if ya’ll want to do this the hard way, ah’m happy to oblige!” Applejack grinned, attaching her lasso to her tail and already swishing it around in circles over her head as she targeted Rainbow Dash’s cloud, “YER MINE, DASH!” With an excited yell, Applejack hurled the lasso straight up towards the cloud with the blue Pegasus resting atop it.

“Huh? She’s not gone yet?” Rainbow snickered, keeping her eyes closed, “Not that it matters; she can’t do anything to ME!” She gasped loudly as she suddenly felt a rope roughly snag her around the middle and soon roughly pulling her straight down through the puffy cloud and towards the ground. “HEY, LET ME GO! AJ, COME ON!”

“Yee-haw, that’s what ah’m talkin’ about!” Applejack laughed, pulling the struggling Pegasus down to the ground before quickly tackling her. The yelping Pegasus put up a fight, but Applejack had quickly tied her wings down so that she couldn’t use them. From there, Rainbow Dash didn’t stand a chance against Applejack’s strength, and soon she was completely hogtied with the cowpony grinning and proudly sitting on top of her.

“Curse you, Applejack,” Rainbow Dash growled, squirming and trying to break free, but once Applejack hogtied it, nothing was breaking it.

“Hey, ah gave you five seconds,” Applejack teased, playfully reaching down and ruffing Dash’s mane as she sat on her, “It’s not mah fault that ya’ll can’t count. Now, once ya’ll agree to come back peacefully so we can get on with our trainin’, ah’ll let ya go.”

Rainbow Dash: *highly irritated, crossing her arms in a huff as she glared at the camera* That is SO not cool! Who does Applejack think she is? Ooh, she is SO gonna get it! *a very slight blush can momentarily be seen on her muzzle as she mutters to herself* I’m not her chair, either.

“Um…what are you doing?” Silver Spoon asked, having caught Spike using some binoculars while hiding behind the outhouse. Diamond Tiara was right behind her, as both fillies had been going for a walk around camp to make sure they got some exercise.

“Like, you’re totally spying on somepony!” Diamond Tiara accused, “That is SO wrong! You could totally get banished for that! Where’s Princess Celestia when you need her?”

“Go away, you nosy fillies,” Spike growled, shooing the two girls away with his free hand as he used the other to hold onto his binoculars, “It’s none of your business what I’m spying…um, looking at! Besides, I don’t talk to bullies like you two.”

“Bullies? We are SO not bullies!” Diamond Tiara snapped, putting her nose in the air, “It’s not OUR fault that all the other ponies we know are so totally jealous of how amazingly beautiful we are and how gorgeous our cutie marks show off our lovely flanks. Informing others of how pathetic they are compared to us is not being bullies; it’s being truthful.”

“Do you even LISTEN to yourself?” Spike sighed, shaking his head and turning to Silver Spoon, “Are you just as bad as your cohort is?” Silver Spoon opened her mouth to speak, but she paused and thought about what to say to the dragon’s question. Deep down, hearing the way Diamond Tiara spoke DID sound like something a bully would say. But, on the other hoof, Diamond Tiara WAS her best friend and they did indeed have very amazing cutie marks. Who was in the right?

Silver Spoon: It feels so totally weird, you know? I usually just agree to whatever Diamond Tiara is saying, since she’s my best friend, but…listening to how she talked and how that dragon called us out, it really does make a girl think. *she glances back at her cutie mark* I AM better than the others…right?

“Come on, Silver Spoon, tell this fool how wrong he is!” Diamond Tiara said, turning to Silver Spoon, “Tell him how foolish he is and just how jealous he is because he’s not a pony.”

“Um…well, that is…I…” Silver Spoon stuttered, still not knowing what to say. Spike and Diamond Tiara both looked at her and waited for an answer, but when the little filly refused to either confirm or deny what her best friend said, the green and purple dragon shrugged and started to walk off.

“Whatever, girls,” he muttered, “Now, if you don’t mind, my Rare…um, my rare bird…that I was watching…just flew away! So, um, I have to go and find it again…Fluttershy! I need your help!” The dragon hurried away, leaving two confused and bemused fillies in his wake.

“Males are, like, so totally weird,” Diamond Tiara muttered, rolling her eyes and shaking her head, “It’s a good thing Snips and Snails aren’t here to make this place any dumber than it already is.”

“Your words you choose to say are quite rude,” a voice said from behind the two fillies, “You should put yourselves into your victim’s hooves.” Both Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon squeaked and leaped forward, whipping their heads back as they saw Zecora eying the two like they were poison joke.

“Creepy zebra!” Diamond Tiara snapped, “It’s SO rude of you to sneak up on us like that! Didn’t your mother teach you any manners?”

“If that is not the pot calling the kettle black,” Zecora sighed, shaking her head, “Your social skills are one thing you both lack. You may be here now, but be warned; everypony else looks upon you with scorn. Change your ways now, and for this game, you might survive. Off this island, however, this is not how you two should live your lives.”

“Like, whatever!” Diamond Tiara scoffed, turning and trotting away, “Come, Silver Spoon; we don’t need to listen to the ramblings of a creepy zebra like her!”

“Um…coming, Diamond Tiara…” Silver Spoon muttered, giving Zecora a somewhat apologetic look before hurrying after her partner-in-crime. Zecora sat on her haunches and watched the two fillies trot away, keeping her eyes focused on the two as many thoughts raced through her mind.

Zecora: It is so sad to see the young ones act as such; young Diamond Tiara is way too much. The look in Silver Spoon’s eyes gives me hope; this is not a time for me to mope. But, until the two can see through another’s eyes, the Boat of Losers will be their only prize. *she closes her eyes and meditates*

“Oh yeah…you apply that sunscreen…wow, just look at you stretching out on that beach towel,” Spike sighed dreamily, now sitting on a high tree branch while peering through his binoculars at something down on the beach, “Such a beautiful body…so incredible and amazing…I think the whole world clapped the day that you were born, my beautiful Rare…”

“Hello, Spike,” a voice purred from just beside the dragon, “I heard that you were looking for me?” Spike screamed and very nearly dropped his binoculars, not to mention very nearly dropped out of the tree. He quickly moved his binoculars down and looked to the side to see Fluttershy flapping her wings and smiling shyly at him.

Spike: Can’t a dragon get one moment of peace to observe the beauty of nature? *he growls in anger and crosses his arms* Nosy girls…they’re going to drive this dragon insane!

“Ugh…hi there, Fluttershy,” Spike grumbled, scooting over to give the Pegasus pony room to sit on his branch, “Yeah, I was just observing Rare…a very rare bird…I think it’s only native to this island.”

“Oh my, is that right?” Fluttershy gasped, taking a seat beside the dragon, “That’s amazing, Spike! What a discovery! May I please observe with you? I would so love to get to know this very rare bird, too.”

“Er…well, you see, Fluttershy…the thing is…” Spike gulped, “The rare bird is…very shy…and beautiful! It’s so beautiful that just looking at it will make your heart melt…but it’s also very shy that if it catches you looking at it, it’ll probably run away…and not wish to ever be seen by you again.”

“Oh dear, you don’t say…” Fluttershy whimpered, hanging her head, “That sounds so very disappointing; the poor little thing. I guess I’d better keep my distance then…even though it hurts that I can’t make friends with the lovely little creature.”

“Yeah…sorry, Fluttershy,” Spike laughed, patting the Pegasus on the back and quickly looking back through his binoculars, “Ugh…and, it seems that my rare bird has left for the dressing room…um, I mean…for its nest, which is obviously very hidden.”

“I hope that it has a very nice day,” Fluttershy smiled. However, a moment later, she blinked and held a hoof to her mouth in thought. “Um…Spike? If it’s so beautiful that it makes your heart melt and if it’s so shy that if it catches you looking at it it’ll run away…why are YOU looking at it? Spike?” The Pegasus looked around in confusion, as she was now alone, as Spike had climbed down and run away seconds before Fluttershy had begun speaking for the second time.

Fluttershy: Um…I feel like I’m messing something here…poor Spike; he probably cares so much about the bird that he doesn’t want to talk about his skills in watching the creature. How sweet!

“BRING IT IN, LADIES!” Discord yelled out with his megaphone, relaxing on his usual hammock cloud, “IT’S TIME FOR YOUR NEXT CHALLENGE!”

“I’m NOT a lady!” Spike angrily yelled up at the spirit of disharmony, “Just because I’m the only male camper doesn’t mean you should count me in with the girls!”

“WHAT’S THAT?” Discord yelled down at Spike, mockingly using his megaphone for no reason, “I DIDN’T HEAR WHAT YOU SAID, SPIKEY.”

“And my name is SPIKE!” the dragon snarled, shaking his fist up at Discord, “I get no respect around here and I’m so tired of it! Just you wait; this next challenge will be me playing the hero!”

“Or more like the zero,” Gilda sneered, kicking Spike aside as she flew into camp, “You and your loser teammates are no way going to beat us. We’ve got the mojo on our side and we ain’t about to give it up to you fools. Man, I can’t WAIT to beat Dash again; she hates losing almost as much as I do!”

“Ooh, ooh, what’s the challenge today, Discord?” Pinkie asked, bouncing in a moment later with the rest of the Magical Misfits following close behind, “Are we gonna have a dance competition? Or maybe we’re gonna see who can bounce the longest? Oh, wait, I know! We’re gonna go skydiving!”

“ALL GOOD IDEAS, BUT ALL INCORRECT,” Discord’s voice blasted down through his megaphone, “ONCE ALL THE CAMPERS GET HERE, I’LL TELL YOU WHAT THE CHALLENGE IS.”

“Discord, MUST you use that thing?” Twilight complained, rubbing her left ear in irritation, “We can hear your voice just fine the way it is.”

“SORRY, TWILIGHT, BUT THE LOUDER MY VOICE, THE MORE HANDSOME AND POWERFUL IT IS!” Discord roared, flashing a smirk down at the unicorn and her team, all of whom were now holding their ears.

Twilight: I could’ve easily gone into explaining how speaking through a megaphone doesn’t actually make your voice any different other than amplifying it a few volumes louder than normal, but I fear that it would’ve fallen on deaf ears…no pun intended.

“GOOD, SO IS EVERYBODY HERE?” Discord’s voice blared as all the campers had seemingly showed up.

“Uh…actually, we’re missing Applejack and Rainbow Dash,” Luna pointed out, looking around with worry, “Is it like them to be late for things?”

“Believe me, Princess, when you’re dealing with those two, you never know WHAT to expect,” Twilight said sarcastically from her own team.

Celestia: It’s so hard being on the opposite team of my faithful, wonderful student; this game is really testing my boundaries in ways that I would’ve never fathomed. *her eyes narrow* And some which I never WANTED to EVER think about…you hear me, Discord? *she points her horn at the camera*

“Sorry, everypony, but we’re here!” Applejack called out, trotting onto the scene a moment later with a staggering Rainbow Dash behind her, “Ah had to rough up Rainbow Dash a bit, but she took longer to convince than ah expected…a LOT longer than ah expected.” She glared back at the Pegasus pony, who now had black rings under her eyes, slight rope marks around her body from how long Applejack’s bindings had held her down, and her mane and tail were ruffled from wrestling with the cowpony.

“Ugh…man, I just want to go back to bed,” Rainbow moaned, rubbing her eyes with a hoof as she glanced at her team, “What are we doing? Not another challenge…darn it! I’m in no shape for this!” She failed to notice the evil grin plastered on Gilda’s face over on the other team.

Gilda: *rubbing her large hands together and smirking* Excellent…Dash is gonna SO get pounded, and once she loses the challenge for her team, her butt is so outta here and I’ll finally prove who the REAL winner is between the two of us! *she laughs loudly* Bye-bye, Dash…too bad you’re so lame now.

“GOOD, YOU’RE FINALLY ALL HERE!” Discord roared, purposely teleporting down and holding his megaphone right in the faces of the Royal Ruffians, particularly the tired Rainbow Dash, “NOW, WE CAN GET TO THE CHALLENGE!”

“OW! DISCORD, THAT HURTS!” Applejack yelped, angrily turning around and rearing up. A moment later, she slammed her back legs into Discord’s megaphone and sent it flying into the distance. All the campers paused and took a moment to watch it fly before cheering for the cowpony, thanking her for ridding them of such an evil nuisance. Applejack was left smirking and sitting on her tush, crossing her front legs as she smugly looked at the annoyed Discord.

“Ooh, naughty, naughty, naughty,” the draconequus scolded, wagging his finger in Applejack’s face, “That megaphone was quite expensive, you know, and furthermore…”

“Keep waggin’ that finger in mah face and yer gonna lose it,” Applejack warned, narrowing her eyes. Discord cocked an eyebrow at the snippy remark, but the cowpony never took her eyes off him. With a wide grin, he wrapped an arm around her and pulled her close.

“So saucy…I LIKE that,” he whispered, tickling Applejack under the chin, “In our next challenge, you’re gonna need to bring that firepower and everything else you’ve got inside of you.”

“And…why…is that?” Applejack asked, feeling very unnerved as she tried to pull away from Discord’s creepy embrace. In response, Discord teleported over to the Magical Misfits and with a snap of his fingers, he was now holding a rubber ball about half the size of Spike in his hand. Before any camper could react, Discord then hurled the ball straight at Applejack’s face with such blinding speed that the hayseed girl didn’t even have time to dodge.

Applejack was struck dead in the face by the rubber ball, being sent flying backwards into the mess hall as she smashed into the wooden building and was flattened from the vicious impact. Her face was scrunched up into a look of sheer pain and agony, her hat fluttering off her head and landing on the ground in front of her tattooed body. The ball itself ended up bouncing back and rolling all the way to Gilda’s feet. The griffon then picked it up, observed it for a moment, and her evil grin got even wider.

“Aww yeah…this day just got 20% more awesome!” she smirked.

“Hey…that’s…part of my saying…” Rainbow Dash grumbled, yawning widely as she glanced back at Applejack plastered to the mess hall, “Hey, AJ…ya gonna be alright?”

“Here’s a spatula; clean your stupid teammate off my mess hall at once!” Nightmare Moon said, poking her head out one of the mess hall’s windows as she tossed them a spatula. Since Rainbow Dash was too groggy to really do anything worthwhile, Fluttershy quickly hurried over and gently started scraping Applejack’s body off the wall with the spatula.

Luna: How barbaric! Our challenge has to involve throwing balls at each other? This is an outrage! I demand to know who invented such a horrible game! *she looks at the camera very, very closely*

“That’s right, folks!” Discord laughed, now sitting comfortably in a white plastic chair after making the two teams walk into a small gymnasium, “Today’s challenge is none other than the famous game of…”

“Um…how do we inflate Applejack?” Fluttershy interrupted, looking down at the flat and twitching Applejack that they had carried with them to the gym, “Does anypony have an air pump handy?”

“Just inflate her the old-fashioned way,” Pinkie called out, grinning from ear-to-ear, “Just blow into her mouth until she pops back to normal! One time, Gummy ended up running out of my window, and I was all like ‘oh no, he’s gonna be squashed like a pancake’, and he totally was, but then I had a great idea of how to inflate him, so I pressed my lips to his and blew him up just like a balloon, and he tried to bite me for that but he totally couldn’t because he had no teeth, and I was all like ‘aw, Gummy, you’re so cute’, and I had a party to celebrate inflating Gummy mouth-to-mouth for the very first time! I totally think that they have a course on mouth-to-mouth in school…isn’t that right, Cheerilee?”

“Um…that’s…a bit different from the mouth-to-mouth YOU’RE talking about, Pinkie, dear,” Cheerilee said weakly, slightly unnerved by the pink pony’s little story and confession.

Pinkie: Aww, they totally don’t get me at all! I KNOW they do mouth-to-mouth in school! It’s totally where you put your mouth on another pony and blow into them, right? Why else would they do something like that? Ponies can be SO confusing, don’t you agree? *she giggles*

“…I’m not touching her lips,” Spike frowned, looking down at Applejack and crossing his arms.

“This is not for me,” Zecora laughed, “Someone else please do the deed.”

“Like, gross!” Diamond Tiara hacked, “I would totally rather kiss Snails then do THAT!”

“I’d rather not,” Silver Spoon stated.

“I…do not know why…but the thought makes me feel weird,” Luna blinked, “Sister, what about you?”

“…Fluttershy, you care for all your friends, you do it please,” Celestia said kindly, smiling at the Pegasus.

“Um…well…that is…I don’t really…that’s just…I…I…I…” Fluttershy squeaked, before moaning and fainting. The rest of the team looked down at the twitching Fluttershy, then looked at one another and gave a quick nod to the obvious answer.

“RAINBOW DASH!” they called out, “WE NEED YOUR HELP!” They looked over at the Pegasus, but found her zonked out and sleeping on the bleachers that were inside the gym.

“Will someone PLEASE inflate her so we can get stated?” Discord snapped, “I’m losing patience here!”

“Spike…you’re a male…this is your DUTY!” Celestia smiled, quickly placing a hoof on the dragon’s back and inching him towards Applejack.

“Yes, Spike, that’s a fact!” Zecora grinned, “Only you can inflate our friend Applejack.”

“HEY, COME ON!” Spike whined, but seeing that his entire team was grinning at him and basically forcing him towards Applejack, he realized he had no choice.

Spike: *moaning and looking up at the ceiling* Rarity, my love, please forgive me for this…

“Alright, alright, I’ll do it!” Spike grumbled, slowly leaning down towards the stunned and flat AJ, “Just please give me some space to work with here.” The rest of his team, excluding Rainbow Dash, granted Spike’s wish and gave him some space. Slowly, the dragon eased a hand behind Applejack’s flat head and gingerly lifted it up. Applejack’s eyes were wide and stunned at what was about to happen, but she couldn’t do a thing in her flat form. Spike was dreading doing this, even if it was just “inflating” her.

He brought Applejack’s face closer to his, and then closer, and even closer. However, try as he might, he just couldn’t place his lips on the pony’s. Then, he realized that his team was counting on him, so he couldn’t let them down. So, as he stared at Applejack’s face, he slowly began imagining her as Rarity instead. When Applejack’s face eventually “morphed” into Rarity’s, Spike’s eyes lit up and he slowly licked his lips. Since he was now seeing “Rarity”, he failed to see just how horrified Applejack now looked as the hungry-looking dragon brought her mouth even closer to his…until there was finally no more space between the sets of lips.

“Yay, Spike, you’re doing it!” Pinkie cheered, despite being on the opposite team, “Woo! Isn’t it fun inflating them like a balloon? Seeing their bellies slowly rise up and seeing their limbs slowly morph back into shape and…uh…Spike? Um…that doesn’t look like…inflating.”

“No…indeed it does not…” Rarity sniffed, looking both disgusted and jealous at the same time, “That looks like…much more than just…inflating.”

“Why is Spike stroking Applejack’s head like that?” Derpy asked, observing closely with both of her twirling eyes, “Why does it look like something is moving inside of Applejack’s mouth? Why does Applejack look to be in pain? Why is Applejack’s face turning green?”

“Trixie finds this quite nauseating and does not wish to watch anymore,” Trixie winced, forcing Twilight to stand in front of her, “You, Twilight Sparkle, you shield Trixie from this gross display of…inflation, if that’s even what this is anymore.”

Twilight: *holding up a book about dragons in front of her face and reading it aloud* Dragons are known to be very vicious and deadly creatures, but at a young age, they can be very…oh boy. *she closes the book and gives herself a face-hoof* This is SO embarrassing…my #1 assistant is...is…UGH!

Thankfully, the horrifying display of “inflation” didn’t last too much longer. Thanks to Spike’s heavy breathing, due to never doing something like this before and thus being very nervous, Applejack eventually DID get inflated back to her normal self. As soon as she did, she very calmly pushed Spike off her body, stood up from the floor, turned around, and sent Spike flying after a horrific bucking. The Magical Misfits had to all dodge aside as Spike was sent blasting past them and smashing into the wall, face-first. Once again, the Royal Ruffians had a flattened teammate on their hooves, not to mention a very annoyed-looking Applejack.

Applejack: *hacking and wiping her mouth with one of her front legs* GROSS! That dragon put his tongue in there and everythin’! And the way he was feelin’ me…UGH! He was totally gettin’ fresh with me! *she hacks a few more times, then chuckles a bit* …ah have to admit, though…he wasn’t bad.

“Now that that’s over with…mostly…we can get to the game at hand!” Discord announced, watching as the lovesick Spike was peeled off the wall and brought back to his team, “If you couldn’t tell from my wonderful intro, the game today is dodgeball!”

“What in the world is dodgeball?” Luna asked, “This game doesn’t sound familiar to me at all, just like chess was completely new to me as well.”

“Dodgeball is a very simple game,” Discord explained, twirling a rubber ball on one finger, “Does anyone know the first rule of dodgeball?”

“Yeah, the first rule is not to talk about dodgeball,” Scootaloo giggled.

“No…the first rule is that if you get hit with a ball, you are out,” Discord frowned, glaring over at the smart aleck little Pegasus, “To avoid going out, you try to DODGE!” He then hurled the ball straight towards Scootaloo. Thankfully, the Pegasus dodged, but another Pegasus ended up getting in the way when she tried to get a better look at the oncoming ball. It smashed her right in the face and sent her for a loop.

“Derpy, you were supposed to dodge, not get in the way” Pinkie giggled, looking down at the poor Pegasus as her eyes were now twirling even faster than before, “Are you okay?”

Derpy: For some odd reason, when the ball hit my face, it felt like little pebbles were bouncing around inside of my head and eyes! *she pokes herself in the eye* Huh…I don’t feel any pebbles, though.

“If you are holding a ball, you can use it to deflect oncoming attacks,” Discord continued, “But if the ball gets knocked out of your hand, you’re out. You may also get someone out by simply catching a ball that is thrown at you. We’ll play five rounds, and the first one to three wins will get immunity and be safe from the vote tonight. When someone from your team goes out, pick someone on your bench to bring in to replace them. After all nine players on your team are out, the round is over and you lose. If a camper refuses to participate in a round, that counts as one of the nine outs.”

“Finally, a game that I can really bash some skulls!” Gilda smirked, cracking her knuckles so loudly that it scared Rarity and made her faint.

“Gilda, please remember that this is just a game and we’re only trying to win, not kill each other,” Twilight said, glaring up at the griffon. However, her words seemed to once again fall on deaf ears, since Gilda paid no attention the unicorn. Sighing, Twilight just rolled her eyes and gathered her group together to discuss who would be on the court first.

Twilight: This is REALLY not my strong suit…at all. But, I’m still gonna try my best; nothing ventured, nothing gained. I just hope I don’t get killed…Applejack is pretty powerful over there.

Celestia: I…have only read about this game…I have never actually played it, of course. This game sounds…horrific. Why Discord would ask us ladies to play such a game…he has a seriously foul mind.

“Scootaloo, you want in?” Twilight asked, looking down at the little Pegasus. At first, Scootaloo naturally wanted to go in, but upon seeing that Rainbow Dash was sleeping on the other side, she changed her mind and shook her head.

“Nah, I think I’ll sit this out,” Scootaloo grinned, “It’s no fun if Rainbow Dash isn’t playing. Besides, with Gilda, I’m sure you guys can handle them.” Before Twilight could protest against this, the Pegasus hopped back over to the bleachers and laid down, staring over at Rainbow Dash and sighing dreamily.

“Um…okay then…I guess I’ll go with Gilda, Apple Bloom, Pinkie, myself, and…” Twilight said, looking at her remaining choices. Rarity looked horrified, Trixie looked angry, Cheerilee looked nervous, and Derpy looked…derpy. She really didn’t know who to go with here. “…Trixie?”

“Humph…Trixie feels like she should sit out…but, to show you all what a GREAT competitor she is, Trixie will humor you and play,” the azure sniffed, trotting onto the mat with the other four as Rarity, Cheerilee and Derpy joined Scootaloo on the bench.

“Just stay back and leave things to me, squirts,” Gilda said, glaring down at the group, “Don’t get in my way or you’ll get hurt…dodgeball is MY game. It’s a shame Dash won’t be joining us; I wanted to kill her so bad…in the game, I mean.”

Apple Bloom: Ah wonder if mah big sister would scold me if ah wanted to sit out because mah own teammate scared me… *she gulped and curled up into a little ball* …like, really, really bad.

“So…while Spike inflates HIMSELF…who else do we got?” Applejack muttered, looking at her team, “Great…Dash is sleepin’…AGAIN! Gah…fine, we can do this without her! Ah’ll put mahself out there, along with…uh…” Applejack then realized she had a very huge problem; her team, without Rainbow Dash, looked incredibly weak. “…Zecora, Princess Luna, Princess Celestia, and…Silver Spoon?”

“Do not worry, dear Applejack,” Luna smiled, proudly stepping onto the floor, “As barbaric as this game sounds, I am going to try my best to double the fun and make sure we win! You can count on me to do my very best!” Unfortunately, her sister didn’t share her enthusiasm, nor did Silver Spoon or Zecora. Applejack sighed and looked like she wanted to strangle Rainbow Dash.

“Okay, now, for our referee to make her grand entrance!” Discord gushed, snapping his fingers as the side doors opened, “Please welcome your referee, Nightmare Moon!” Both teams groaned as the ebony princess grinned fiercely and strutted into the gym, making sure to give each and every camper a good, menacingly look before taking her seat at the ref’s chair.

Applejack: *she spits on her hooves and rubs them together* Heck, even if we ARE facin’ Gilda and we don’t have Rainbow Dash, we’re STILL gonna win this! Just watch us!

“Okay…round one…BEGIN!” Discord yelled, snapping his fingers as 10 rubber balls were teleported into the gym, five for each side. Even before any of the Royal Ruffians could attempt to pick up a ball or move it to where they could kick it (since none of the campers, aside from Gilda and Spike, actually had hands), they were in for a very rude awakening. Almost instantly, Silver Spoon shrieked as she was pelted with a ball from the opposite side, making Nightmare Moon blow her referee whistle and call her out. Then, as quick as lightning, the four other balls came flying over as well, bashing Applejack, Celestia, Luna, and Zecora all in their faces and making them all shriek in pain as they all crashed in a heap.

“HAD ENOUGH, LOSERS?” Gilda laughed, having thrown all five balls with a very scary look in her eyes, “FEEL FREE TO GIVE UP NOW!” Since Spike was still out of commission and Rainbow Dash was sleeping, the Royal Ruffians only two substitutes were Fluttershy and Diamond Tiara. However, after seeing the look in Gilda’s eyes, both girls huddled together and instantly refused to move, giving the first point to the Magical Misfits.

Applejack: *now sporting a black eye* …what the hay just happened?!?!

“Um…nice work…Gilda,” Twilight gulped, standing far away from the griffon and slightly huddling with Trixie, out of complete fear, “Way to…show them…who’s boss…and stuff like that.”

“YOU BET, DWEEB!” Gilda grinned, getting right into Twilight’s face with bulging eyes, “I LIVE FOR THIS! WE’RE GONNA WIN AND THAT’S ALL THERE IS TO IT!”

“Good to know…now, if you could just back up a good 10 feet or so, I’d really appreciate it,” Twilight said meekly, trying to pull Trixie in front of her.

“Okay…start round two!” Nightmare Moon had called out, Discord now relaxing with his sunglasses on and not paying much attention, “Who’s on the court this time?”

“Um…Scootaloo…you want in?” Twilight asked, nervously making her way over to the bench and looking at the Pegasus.

“Heh…you guys did SUCH a great job that I don’t want to mess anything up,” Scootaloo responded, still focusing on Rainbow Dash and trying to mimic her sleeping style, “So, I’ll sit this one out, too.”

“Well, if you’re sure,” Twilight gulped, looking back at the enraged Gilda with terrified eyes, “I just would…kinda like you out there…but, it’s fine, don’t worry.”

“Princess Celestia…Princess Luna…Zecora…Silver Spoon…are you all ahright?” Applejack moaned, patting her black eye as she faced her four injured teammates.

“No, Applejack, I am not…but, there is no way I’m letting that griffon do that to me and get away with it!” Celestia growled, pushing Applejack aside and stepping back onto the court, “You, griffon! If you think you can just act like a jerk, you’ve got another thing coming! Luna, join my side!”

“Why are you getting ME involved with this?” Luna gulped, “Once was enough for me, thank you!” However, since Fluttershy and Diamond Tiara both still refused to budge, and since Spike STILL wasn’t inflated and no one wanted to touch the perverted dragon, they were still on their own. Applejack was much too stubborn to wake up Rainbow Dash, too; she wanted to win this on her own.

“The pain…it flows…through my body,” Zecora moaned, “This dodgeball…does not make a good hobby.”

“I can’t move my nose…I can’t even SMELL with my nose!” Silver Spoon cried. But, the foursome joined Applejack on the court anyway, determined to not let the psycho Gilda beat them.

Gilda: *insanely* Yes…the bird of prey weakens her victims by attacking them…scaring them…making them weak and tired and helpless…before she swoops in…for the kill. *her eyes flash*

“Round two…begin!” Nightmare Moon called out, blowing her whistle. This time, the five brave Royal Ruffian teammates kept their eyes locked on Gilda before they bothered to get a ball. Gilda, however, just stayed in one place, grinning over at the five and daring them to make a move. There were no balls near Gilda; they were all near the half court line. All of the Royal Ruffians’ balls were only a few inches in front of their hooves.

“Ahright…if ya’ll ain’t gonna do anythin’…then ah will!” Applejack snarled, quickly turning around and bucking at the ball that was closest to her, “TAKE THIS!” The cowpony sent her bucked ball blasting over towards Gilda, who still didn’t have a ball in her hand. However, with a loud laugh, Gilda just reached over and grabbed Trixie and held her in front of her as a shield. All the campers that weren’t knocked out or sleeping gasped in shock as Applejack’s ball smacked Trixie right in the face, saving Gilda.

“GAH!” Trixie cried, instantly falling to the ground in deep pain, “YOU…EVIL…IT HURTS…”

“Gilda, are you MAD?!?!” Twilight screamed, racing over to Trixie’s side and kneeling down to check on her, “What in all of Equestria was THAT about? You just used your own teammate as a shield! How low can you go?”

“Quite low,” Gilda smirked, instantly grabbing Twilight around the neck, “In fact, allow me to show you another tactic that I so love to use!” As Twilight’s eyes bulged out of her head and she weakly beat at Gilda’s hands with her hooves, the entire gym watched in horror as Gilda began brutally crushing the unicorn in her fists. Forcing Twilight to duck her head between her back legs and then crunching her body into a horrifically painful mashed form, Gilda formed her own unicorn dodgeball a second later.

“GILDA, THAT’S GOING TOO FAR!” Celestia yelled, “DISCORD, NIGHTMARE MOON, STOP THE GAME! GILDA IS OUT OF…” However, her sentence was cut off as Gilda hurled her Twilight dodgeball straight into the princess’ face, causing both student and mentor to cry in pain as they were both blasted back into the wall. Twilight ended up uncurling from her pained ball form a moment later, resting on top of Celestia’s mare body. The two girls weakly looked at one another, then both collapsed.

“This…is different…but, there’s nothing in the rulebook that says you can’t use teammates as shields or as balls,” Nightmare Moon stated, “That did look painful, but…eh, it’s not me!” She blew her whistle a few times, indicating that Trixie, Twilight, and Celestia were all out. However, a second later, all Gilda had to do was hurl four more rubber balls at the stunned remaining Royal Ruffians and they once again were all eliminated.

Silver Spoon: *twitching, now with two black eyes and a busted nose* It…it hurts…it hurts bad.

“JUST ONE MORE, SHRIMPS!” Gilda screeched, pumping her fists in the air, “JUST ONE MORE ROUND BEFORE YOU’RE ALL TOAST! I’M GONNA KEEP SMASHING YOUR FACES UNTIL YOU BEG FOR MERCY!”

“Gilda, this has gone too far!” Cheerilee frowned, stepping off the bench to replace the injured Twilight, “I must protest your horrible tactics for this crude game! You seriously hurt Twilight, you used Trixie for your shield, you could’ve very nearly injured our own Princess Celestia, and you’re acting like a jerk!”

“Want to make something of it, teacher girl?” Gilda asked coldly, turning her beady eyes to Cheerilee and sizing her up. At first, Cheerilee refused to be bullied like this. However, she also didn’t want to set a bad example for her students by starting a fight, so she sucked up her pride and forced herself to just ease away from Gilda and take a random place on the mat.

Cheerilee: This is unacceptable…I don’t care HOW strong she is. This is just a game and nothing more; is money and revenge really worth getting hurt over? Gilda has so much to learn…so very much.

“Please…Miss Applejack…PLEASE don’t make me go back out there,” Silver Spoon cried, tears streaming down her face as she looked up at the hayseed, “I’m begging you…this hurts too bad…vote me out if we lose, I don’t care! I don’t want to go back out there!” Her glasses had thankfully been made unbreakable at the start of the game from Discord’s magic, but even they looked close to breaking; Gilda’s power was that incredible.

“Sugarcube…ahright, ah understand,” Applejack said softly, gently stroking the hurt filly, “Ah know how ya’ll feel…but, at the same time, we can’t just lie down like dogs and let Gilda do this to us. This isn’t just about us now…it’s about everyone in this gym! That griffon has a lot to learn, but she doesn’t belong HERE to do it. We need someone who knows her…who can get into her head…who can BEAT her…” Slowly, Applejack looked down at the sleeping Rainbow Dash.

Applejack: Ah didn’t want it to have to come to this…resortin’ to Rainbow Dash…but, desperate times call for desperate measures…besides, she IS our teammate…she needs to be helpin’ us!

“Best friends they once were, this is true,” Zecora muttered, looking down at the azure Pegasus, “Surely she can help us now, our friend of blue.”

“Y-y-y-yes…p-p-p-please w-w-w-wake R-R-R-Rainbow D-D-D-Dash…” Fluttershy whimpered, holding Diamond Tiara like a teddy bear by this point, even though the stuck-up filly didn’t seem to mind.

“Ahright then…Discord, yer megaphone, please,” Applejack muttered, trotting over to the snoozing draconequus. Discord looked annoyed, but he did lift his sunglasses and give the pony his attention.

“Fine, but if you break this one, I’m sending you into exile!” Discord frowned, snapping his fingers and once more teleporting in a megaphone.

“Thank ya kindly,” Applejack smiled, taking it and limping back over to Rainbow Dash. Slowly, the cowgirl held the megaphone right into Rainbow Dash’s left ear. “GILDA WON!”

“WHAT?!?!” Rainbow Dash shrieked, falling off her bleacher as her eyes instantly shot up, “No, Gilda can NOT win! I won’t let her! She cheats and she’s dirty! She…she…huh?” The Pegasus slapped her head a few times to get the ringing in her ears to go away, then she looked at her wounded team in confusion. Applejack just sat there and let Rainbow Dash take it all in.

First, Rainbow Dash observed where she was. Second, she looked at her hurt teammates and those who were too scared to move or say anything, not to mention the still-flat Spike. Third, she saw the familiar rubber balls on the ground. Finally, she looked over and saw Twilight and Trixie both laying in pain on the opposite team’s bench, Scootaloo waving happily to her, and Gilda grinning evilly in her direction. No words needed to be spoken for Rainbow Dash to understand the situation.

“…wish you would’ve woken me up sooner, AJ,” Rainbow Dash frowned, cracking her hooves like Gilda would her knuckles as she glared over at the griffon, “This is now personal. Royal Ruffians, you will all do what I say and when I say it, do you understand? Put your faith in me. If we lose this, please vote me out, since allowing Gilda to win is the ultimate humiliation I could have happen to you guys, and I would not deserve to be here.”

“That’s the Rainbow Dash ah know!” Applejack grinned, noticing that Dash’s speech seemed to have sparked something within her team, “What would ya like us all to do?”

“Fight fire with fire,” Rainbow Dash frowned, pulling her team in for a huddle, “I think we all want the same thing here…even the other team. Just do what I say and it’ll be alright. Applejack, you’re the only one I want on the floor with me; the rest of you are safe to stay on the bench.”

“But…Gilda only has to get both of you out and we lose!” Diamond Tiara spoke up from Fluttershy’s arms, “Not that I want to go out there or anything, but…”

“Please, just trust me,” Rainbow said softly, “My element isn’t loyalty for nothing; you have nothing to fear. I won’t fail you, I promise.” Even though the team still looked worried, they knew Rainbow Dash and that she was true to her word. Lazy she might be, but she was so much more than that.

Rainbow Dash: *slowly spreading black war paint on her face* Okay, Gilda…you want to play dirty, we can play dirty…it’s time to kick your butt back where it came from! No one hurts my friends…no one.

“Oh, THIS is perfect!” Gilda grinned, watching as only Rainbow Dash and Applejack came onto the court, “I’ll knock you both out at once for the perfect victory. My prey is right where I want them.”

“Thank you for being here, AJ,” Rainbow Dash whispered, gently nuzzling the cowgirl and wincing as she took a closer look at her injuries, “You…really took a lot…I’m really sorry I’ve been so selfish.”

“Hey, hey, none of that…what’s done is done,” Applejack chuckled, nuzzling the Pegasus back, “Besides, this is here and now, so let’s make the most of it…ya’ll can make it up to me later.” She grinned and winked at Dash, who playfully winked back. Then, the two faced down Gilda. Ironically, Gilda’s entire team had realized what was gonna happen, so they ALL had taken a seat on the bench, leaving the griffon alone on the court to face her old friend and Applejack.

“Oh, this is getting GOOD!” Nightmare Moon grinned, levitating her whistle up to her mouth, “Okay…round three…let’s go!” She blew the whistle.

Almost immediately, Rainbow Dash whispered a plan to Applejack while Gilda gathered up her first ball; she wanted to make her hits really count this time. Upon hearing Rainbow’s plan, Applejack grinned and gave her a little nod. Rainbow Dash then raced forward and gathered two balls into her arms before flapping her wings and flying up towards the ceiling, leaving Applejack alone on the bottom. Gilda didn’t really get what Dash was trying to do, since an airstrike would never take her by surprise. Smirking, the griffon took aim at the flying Pegasus while also keeping an eye on the hayseed below.

“Hey, Gilda, check it out!” Applejack grinned, suddenly turning around and lifting back her tail, “Ah got a perfect target for ya’ll…it’s what YOU are!” She used her tail to slap her own rump as she mooned the griffon, giving it a shake now and then as Gilda instantly looked angry at being mocked.

“Oh, you’re calling me an ass?” Gilda snarled, “Well, at least I’m a WINNING ass!” Taking her eyes momentarily off Rainbow Dash, Gilda hurled a ball straight at Applejack’s butt…and soon was bashed in the head with a ball from Rainbow Dash up above.

“YOU’RE OUT!” Nightmare Moon called out, blowing her whistle, “ROUND THREE GOES TO THE ROYAL RUFFIANS! NEXT UP IS ROUND FOUR!”

“WHAT?!?!” Gilda shrieked, the ball not really having done any damage to her, aside from angering her, “DASH, YOU CHEATING LITTLE WORM!”

“Takes one to know one, Gilda,” Rainbow Dash grinned, flying down and giving Applejack a high-hoof. The Royal Ruffians bench all cheered happily, still somewhat in pain, but now very rejuvenated after what they just saw. Even though they lost the round, it seemed that the Magical Misfits were happy, too. It was during this time that no one noticed another certain camper had finally gotten back up.

“Okay, same format as before?” Nightmare Moon asked, seeing Rainbow Dash, Applejack and Gilda remain the only ones on the court, “Very well…round four, begin!” She blew her whistle one more time.

“I’LL GET YOU LITTLE WEASELS GOOD THIS TIME!” Gilda snarled, hurling every ball she could get her hands on straight at Rainbow Dash and Applejack. Having whispered another plan to AJ, Dash had quickly lifted the girl onto her back and had taken to the air, where she was much more comfortable dodging balls. Despite Gilda’s powerful throws, each of her tosses missed and she was left screeching in anger and rage.

“Now…part two!” Rainbow Dash laughed, floating back down to the ground as all the balls were now on her team’s side, “Ready, AJ?”

“Ready, RD!” Applejack smirked, “Let’s get her!” Putting the second part of their second plan into action, Rainbow Dash and Applejack started kicking and throwing balls at Gilda’s legs, trying to keep them away from her hands. Catching onto this quickly, Gilda began flying and jumping around to avoid the low throws. However, this was just what Rainbow Dash had anticipated. During one of her throws, she pretended to throw the ball at Gilda’s legs, but ended up slightly moving her wrist so that the ball went just a bit higher than it should have. Gilda never saw it coming.

“Gilda is struck in the stomach and the Royal Ruffians win round four!” Nightmare Moon called out, blowing her whistle and ignoring the enraged screams from the griffon, “We will now have a fifth and deciding match. The winner of this match will win it all! Discord, you’re missing quite a show here.” However, Discord was now snoring loudly on his chair with a book over his face.

Nightmare Moon: WHY did I let this idiot sucker me into doing this mundane job again?

“This is it, Applejack,” Rainbow said, patting her friend on the back, “All or nothing…right here, right now! One of us wins, one of us loses…who will it be?”

“Ah don’t know…no, wait, ah DO know!” Applejack grinned, “It’s gonna be US!” The air was heavy with anticipation at the final match, both teams so nervous and wondering what was gonna happen. They were both so preoccupied with watching the threesome that they failed to notice somebody sneak onto the court and head towards the back.

“Okay…final round…begin!” Nightmare Moon yelled, blowing on her whistle.

“No more Miss Nice Griffon!” Gilda snarled, holding two balls in her hands as she glared at Rainbow and Applejack, “You both are dead meat, and I’m the vulture!”

“Wow, nice insult…did you come up with that one all by yourself?” Rainbow Dash teased, just before she shrieked and got pummeled right in the face by an onslaught of balls, all fired in rapid succession.

“RAINBOW DASH!” Applejack screamed, but was soon nailed by the same barrage of balls, too. The two girls had gotten so cocky that they had forgotten that Gilda had all the balls during this round, not to mention they hadn’t anticipated Gilda attacking so quickly instead of coming up with a strategy.

“Applejack…team…I’m sorry,” Rainbow Dash whimpered, twitching on the floor in pain as she began crawling back towards her bench, “I tried…I got cocky…I let Gilda win…”

“Sugarcube…it’s ahright…ya’ll have nothin’ to apologize for,” Applejack smiled, dragging herself back along with Rainbow Dash, “There’ll always be next time, so…”

“THIS AIN’T OVER YET!” a voice yelled out from the Royal Ruffians’ court. Gilda, who had just begun celebrating finally defeating Dash, turned back around to see who dared still opposed her. The entire gym gasped upon seeing just who was standing on the court opposite Gilda. After being flattened during the very start of the challenge, he had slowly inflated himself naturally and had snuck back onto the court without anyone having seen him. It was Spike.

“Oh, THIS is rich,” Gilda snickered, ignoring the stunned expressions on all the other campers’ faces, “The baby dragon is trying to save his team, even though it’s about to cost him his pride and his health. Hey, unicorn, why don’t you make THAT one of your stupid lessons on friendship? At the cost of pride and your health, trying to save your miserable team from losing will not work, but the thought is so funny that it’s good for a laugh! Isn’t that a perfect lesson?”

Spike: There’s no way I’m letting Gilda win this! This is my chance to earn that respect! All of you ladies out there…mainly Rarity…watch me work my own brand of magic. *he flexes his muscles*

“Spike…w-w-what’re you doing!?!?” Celestia called from the sidelines, “You don’t have to do this!”

“Yeah, seriously!” Rainbow Dash added, “Don’t do this just for the team! There’s always next time!”

“Are you kidding? This IS the next time!” Spike frowned, glaring over at his team, “What happened to your fighting spirit, huh? It’s never over until it’s over and the fat pony sings! Well, I’m still standing, and until I get knocked out, this team still lives.”

“But…Spike…do ya’ll seriously think you can beat Gilda?” Applejack asked, “To beat her, ya’ll either need to throw her out…which ah don’t think ya can do…or catch her next throw. Do ya really think ya’ll can do that?” Spike looked down at his small body and his small muscles, then looked over at the griffon. Compared to him, she seemed like a giant, ready to eat him up for dinner. The dragon, however, after seeing the look on his team’s faces, not to mention the look on Rarity’s on the opposite sideline, refused to show any fear.

“I got this,” was all that he said, turning away from his team and glaring down Gilda. The entire gym was thrown into silence. No one seemed to breathe or make any sudden movement. The benches both stayed perfectly still as every set of eyes was on the two campers on the court. This was the classic battle of good versus evil, David versus Goliath, bully versus victim…who would win?

Slowly, Gilda reached for the final ball on her side of the court that she had not yet thrown. Her eyes were locked with Spike’s as the dragon and griffon glared each other down. An inner rivalry seemed to be brewing, since both dragons and griffons were naturally powerful and mythical creatures. No matter what the size, age or gender, it was personal between the two species. Spike’s tail slowly wagged back and forth behind him as he clenched his fists, while Gilda licked her beak and clenched her rubber ball tightly in her talon. Time seemed to freeze for a moment, then Gilda reared up for her throw.

“Prepare…to…DIE!” she roared, using all her might and all her power to hurl her ball straight towards the baby dragon on the opposite court. No one had a chance to catch their breath or gasp, as the ball made contact with Spike a second later and send him once again smashing into the back of the court and into the wall. The entire gym was once again thrown into silence, everyone either horrified or curious as to if this meant Spike had lost or not.

Slowly, Spike crumbled onto the floor, his back pointing into the air as he twitched in pain. Gilda was left grinning and soon crossed her arms in victory. The entire Royal Ruffians team looked disappointed, while the entire Magical Misfits team looked scared at the thought of keeping Gilda for another day or two. However, Spike then ended up rolling over onto his back. There, clutched on top of his stomach with both arms and both legs…was the rubber ball. It was firmly held and obviously a catch.

“SPIKE CATCHES THE BALL FOR THE ROYAL RUFFIANS!” Nightmare Moon announces, blowing her whistle and looking thrilled for some reason, “THE RUFFIANS WIN THE MATCH, 3-2!”

“WHAT?!?!?!?!” the entire gym seemed to scream at the same time, everyone completely stunned and confused by what they were experiencing. Did Spike, the smallest competitor there, actually catch a bullet pass from the fiercest competitor there to eliminate her and thus win the match for his team?

“SPIKE, YOU DID IT!” Rainbow Dash cheered, racing over to the dragon and playfully bucking him up onto her back.

“I…think…all…my…ribs…are…broken,” Spike managed to gasp, obviously in deep, deep pain. However, his team was much too happy with his heroics to really care about his pain, and soon they were all laughing and cheerfully heading for the exits while serenading the little dragon. Gilda was left looking dumbstruck and speechless on the opposite end of the court.

“Ugh…that was a great nap…what’d I miss?” Discord asked, lifting his head up and yawning a moment later, “Oh, is the game already over? Who won, Nightmare Moon?”

“You…are hopeless,” Nightmare Moon frowned, teleporting away in a huff and leaving Discord to clean up what was left.

Discord: What’s HER problem? Females, I swear; you can’t live with ‘em…yeah, that’s all.

“So…it looks like the Magical Misfits lost,” Discord snickered, floating over to the team and noticing that they looked kinda happy about the loss, “Why do you all look…happy? You just lost.”

“You’ll see later, Discord,” Rarity smiled, leaping off the bleachers and heading for the door, “Right now, I have a little dragon to congratulate and give a little kiss to...after I sanitize his mouth, of course.”

“And Twilight and Trixie could both use a trip to the infirmary,” Cheerilee said, pointing to the two hurt unicorns, one sporting two black eyes and a bloody nose while the other one’s entire body seemed disfigured and still in pain.

“Uh-oh…my Pinkie Sense is acting up!” Pinkie cried, feeling her ears flap back and forth, “My right ear flapped eight times, and my left one flapped six! That means that someone is gonna blow up and go crazy! So, we’d best hurry away right now!”

“Good idea, Pinkie,” Apple Bloom chuckled, “Derpy, Miss Cheerilee, let’s take Trixie and Twilight and get outta here, quick!” With a nod, Cheerilee and Derpy both set the two hurt unicorns on their backs and quickly headed for the exit. Scootaloo cast a look over at the twitching Gilda before shaking her little head and hurrying after them.

Scootaloo: I’d hate to be anywhere near that gym at a moment like this… *she shivers a bit*

Hours later, after Discord’s gym was entirely destroyed by an enraged Gilda and all the hurt ponies and non-ponies had been taken to the infirmary, Discord went and started the elimination ceremony. Apple Bloom, Cheerilee, Derpy Hooves, Gilda, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Scootaloo all came in without any noticeable injuries, while Trixie had her nose taped and bandaged up and was holding an icepack over her eyes. Twilight had to wheel herself in on a wheelchair, since Nightmare Moon had to realign her body structure and it would take 24 hours for it to properly fix itself.

“Ah, girls, welcome to your next elimination ceremony!” Discord smiled, “Oh, and Twilight, nice wheels! How much did they cost you?”

“Just…most of the bones…in my body,” Twilight moaned, still being sarcastic even at a time like this.

“Yes, well, it’s now time to get to your next vote,” Discord went on, “You know the drill by now, since this is your second time here. Simply vote for the camper that you want to be kicked off; it’s that simple. And that camper can never, ever, EVER come back…EVER!”

“For…EVER!” Pinkie cried.

“Don’t do that again,” Discord frowned, “Now, let’s hurry up and get to the vote; I can tell you all need your rest, and tired campers equal bad ratings, so I can’t have that. Apple Bloom, you’re up first.”

Rarity: *shows the camera that she voted for Gilda* Why we didn’t do this first, I’ll never know. Poor Vinyl took the fall instead. Well, now’s the time to correct our mistake. *she puts it in the box*

Scootaloo: *shows the camera that she voted for Gilda* You are seriously creepy and insane! Strong or not, we don’t need that on our team! *She puts the ballot in the box*

Trixie: *shows the camera that she voted for Gilda* No one damages the Great and Powerful Trixie’s beautiful face and gets away with it, half-breed! *she puts the ballot in the box*

Twilight: *weakly holds the ballot up to the camera with her mouth, showing that it said Gilda* Mmm…mmmm….mmmmm… *she slips the ballot into the box, then groans* Ow…this hurts…

“You all have made your decisions,” Discord said, teleporting the box in front of him, “Once the votes are read, the decision is FINAL, and that camper will be sent down the Dock of Shame at once. I will now read the votes.” He snapped his fingers and got out his fake reading glasses, putting them on as the Magical Misfits all looked at one another and gave little knowing nods. The draconequus removed the top of the ballot box and reached for the first ballot.

“First vote…Scootaloo,” Discord said, showing the campers the first ballot with Scootaloo’s name on it.

“Second vote…Gilda. That’s one vote Scootaloo, one vote Gilda.”

“Third vote…Gilda. That’s two votes Gilda, one vote Scootaloo.”

“Fourth vote…Gilda. That’s three votes Gilda, one vote Scootaloo.”

“Fifth vote…Gilda. That’s four votes Gilda, one vote Scootaloo.”

“Third loser of Total Magic Pony Island…” Discord announced, slowly flipping over the sixth and deciding ballot, “…Gilda. Um, sorry, Gilda, but it’s time for…”

“WHAT?!?! ME?!?! YOU ALL HAVE GOT A LOT OF NERVE!” Gilda roared, getting up and instantly cracking her knuckles, “I’M GONNA BASH ALL YOU FACES IN! HOPE YOU LIKE THAT WHEELCHAIR, UNICORN, BECAUSE I’M SHOVING IT RIGHT UP YOUR…MMMMPH!” At that moment, Discord had teleported over and quickly attached a straightjacket on the angry griffon, making sure to also cover up her beak. The scared Misfits teammates then watched as Gilda was dragged down the Dock of Shame in that same condition, thrashing as hard as she could and glaring back at the group with eyes of hatred.

Cheerilee: *shivering and shaking her head* One day, I hope that Gilda can find it in her heart to open up to love and friendship…I won’t give up hope for her; no one is pure evil, I know that.

Derpy: Wow…did you all see Glenda? Um…I mean…yeah, I think her name was Glenda. Anyway, she’s SO crazy! *her eyes spin around wildly as she giggles a bit* Thankfully she’s gone now!

Rarity: *sniffing* That intolerable creature seriously needs to take some anger management classes…along with a hundred other classes that I simply cannot waste my time saying in this bathroom.

“Such a shame…you brought such great ratings to our show,” Discord sighed, tossing Gilda onto the Boat of Losers and watching as it started to chug away, carrying the silently screaming griffon, “But, alas, that’s what happens when you’re an evil jerk. I’m really glad that I’M not like that.”

“No, but you’re pretty darn close, if you ask me,” Celestia stated, standing on the Dock of Shame and glaring up at the draconequus. In response to this, Discord snapped his fingers and a bucket of water dropped down on the princess’ head a second later. “…I hate you so much, Discord.”

“You know you love me,” Discord smirked, before turning to face the cameras, “Anyway, with our dear little princess cooled off, let’s only hope that the same happens to everyone’s favorite griffon, Gilda! The huge attitude problem for the Misfits is gone, but without muscle, can they still compete? As for the Ruffians, how will Spike be treated now that he’s a hero? Will Rainbow Dash stop being so lazy and continue to step up when her team needs her? Will Applejack keep her place as fan favorite?”

“Wait, ah’m a fan favorite?” Applejack gasped, trotting onto the scene and happily twirling her hat in the air, “Yee-haw! That’s what ah’m talkin’ ‘bout! Oh…let me help ya with that, Princess.” She began trying to pull the bucket off Celestia’s head.

“…all of that and more, right here, on Total…Magic…Pony…Island!” Discord concluded, “Goodnight, Equestria!”

"GAH! Got it!" Applejack laughed, holding the bucket in her hooves as the grateful princess grumbled and glared up at Discord, as the cameras all faded.