• Member Since 22nd Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Feb 26th, 2020

WiseFireCracker


24, Canadian. Avatar drawn by the amazing Mix-up.

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Sometimes, Life really screws you over.

And sometimes, a friend helps you back on your feet.


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An entry for the The Most Dangerous Game Contest.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 15 )

I think I've contracted diabetes from how sweet this ending is and how you've made pinkie. :fluttercry::twilightsmile:
Very nice story.:pinkiehappy:

I both like and don't like this story. The ending just feels incomplete, even though I know it works at the same time. You have a well developed character who is essentially at the point where he has nothing to live for and then you introduce the possibility of him regaining his talent. I think what bothers me is that you leave it open on whether he actually succeeds at learning to play. The problem is that he has ingrained memory of how to play with fingers which could frustrate him to no end. Further, there are some things that can't be played by hooves (at least by my imagination) due to the splitting of fingers and hitting multiple keys in just the right order. I guess I just don't like the openness of the ending and want the: does he succeed and finally regain some semblance of a life or does he fail and finally give up on his miserable life?

Did his sister have a miscarriage? :rainbowhuh:

4609986 Thanks! Pinkie has always been the character I am never satisfied with when I write her. This is probably the only time I thought it was closer to the show's Pinkie. And I'm glad the sweetness struck true with you (and sorry about the diabetes, that's not cool).

4610042 Write it! Then tell me, and I will read it, and cry! :raritywink:

4610258 Eeyup! :eeyup:

4610014 You see, the theme of the story kind of required that I stop here. It has to be open. The path is long and complicated, and I can't tell you right here, right now if he does succeed. Learning to play at a professional level again? That's going to take time, regardless of success. And even then, it won't be like he was back home. Still, the Gala episode showed that pianist is a legitimate career for a pony... Yeah, I'm not sure how that works either. In any case, thank you for sharing your opinion with me, it does help bring things in perspective.

4610360
Eh, that's all I can usually provide is my perspective. I can analyze my feelings to death but sometimes I can't even offer good advice. I think you ended it the right way for this story. To the story you designed, it doesn't matter what happens next, only that he is starting along that road. Myself, however, always disliked open endings like this a lot of the time. Usually the only times I like open endings are the "now what adventure shall we go on next my friendly sidekick?"

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

While not the best story I've ever read, you did a marvelous job in conveying the loss this character feels. I'm glad this ends on a hopeful note. You've definitely succeeded at what the contest set out to do, and I think this is one of the stronger entries. Well done!

A fascinating variation of ponified human in Equestria, combined with elegant, poignant character building and Pinkie at her best. Well done. Thank you for it. Best of luck in the judging.

Making full use of a human in 5,000 words is no mean feat, and yet with a few choice flashbacks, you have managed to both give your human a past and pay it without getting distracted from the overarching action of the story. Have a ribbon:
i.imgur.com/6MrWqNZ.png

5057445 Wow, thank you for your assesment. I'm so pleased that it fits the criteria and that you appreciated it! :rainbowkiss:

Huh, I did read this.

“Could you please tell us what is wrong?”

NO! NO HE COULDN’T!

How could he…?
The loss of his fingers couldn’t be expressed with mere words. He had lost his music, and with it, his dream and passion.

The irony is strong in this one.

There is a precipice and this story is teetering on the edge of said precipice.
Maybe I've changed or maybe the story just hasn't aged well, perhaps both - whichever the case, it is right on the edge.

And now, I have fallen.

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