[E] Prologue
Discord sat on his throne, happily laughing at the misfortune of the ponies around him as he listened to his phonograph. A mare and her foal ran from a giant peppermint trying to eat them. Discord laughed; candy trying to eat foals instead the other way around. However, he never would let them get eaten. After all, it was just a joke. He watched the mare throw her foal out of the way to save her, but just before she was crushed the peppermint burst into bubbles.
Discord was almost dying of laughter; she tried sacrificing her life so her... foal... could live. Discord looked around; so much chaos, so much fun, yet no one to share it with. Was there even anyone that shared his love of chaos? That's when an idea came to his mind, a terribly chaotic, brilliant idea.
Discord back-flipped off of his throne and landed behind it. Now looking at the back of his throne he pulled out a pencil and began to draw a door. Opening up the door, he saw that it led to a pencil drawn staircase. He descended the staircase into a large room and saw what looked to be a massive MRI scanner with water floating vertically in it’s entry. On the side it said "Not a Stargate TM", and in smaller letters it read "not a stolen Stargate".
Call it the heat of the moment or just plain stupidity but Discord walked up to the portal. This was no gate through the stars, but a passageway through the realms. But before he walked through the gate a thought came to his mind, 'Is this the best thing to do? Is risking my life with a possibly defective portal really worth it?... Yes, yes it is.' With that, he walked through.
As he entered the new realm, the realm of these "humans", he looked around to find himself in a small alleyway on a rainy night. He truly loved this realm; the humans were always so chaotic, emotions so random and jumbled at times. There was always a war or crime so different than the last. A human friend was the answer. A human... Discord looked to himself noticing he was still a draconequus; he quickly hid himself from any peeping eyes.
He used his chaos magic and looked for the highest levels of chaos. He got a signal right away. He levitated following the trail of chaos which just seemed to dance through the air.
Walking through the street was a teenage girl in a zipped up black hoodie. Alas, it was not the girl that seemed to radiate the wonderful chaos but the newborn child in her arms. She quickly walked, not caring that she was soaked. Discord followed her until she stopped outside of an orphanage. She set the child on the orphanage's doorstep and knocked before quickly running away.
Discord waited for a few minutes, no one came to the door. He walked up to the newborn. It was a sleeping boy. 'Why do children always have the most chaos in them?' Discord thought. 'Let’s have a look, shall we?’ he thought with a grin. With a snap of his claws he looked into the past of the child. A young teenage girl was raped by her boyfriend and his friends. Her parents only cared what the outside world thought of them. She was kept home and locked in her room so no one would know of her child. And then the child was a born and given the this orphanage. He was truly born in chaos.
Discord smiled and said "You were born in chaos, so let you be raised in chaos.” The child's eye slowly opened, a soft cry escaped his lips.
"It's okay! Just, uh... just go back to sleep." Discord said worriedly, the babies cries only getting louder. "Uh... Uh... umm... ah-HA of course you’re just hungry." Discord said took one of his two fangs, turned it into a bottle, and gave it to the baby. The small babies crying stopped instantly. "See? Now come on, you're coming home with me." With that they left for Discord's 'Not a Stargate'.
On the other side of the gate Discord looked down at his human baby and found a new born draconequus. "What? How did this happen?" he whispered as he lifted up the draconequus, finding no human in sight. He looked at the draconequus and noticed something, it looked just like him, but only missing a tooth. This led to a sudden realization by Discord. ‘The Stargate must have recognized a foreign body that wasn’t compatible with this world, and so it created a new body based on any nearby information, in this case being the DNA from my tooth-bottle. Brilliant!’
"You're my... my... uhh... You need a name don't you?" Discord asked the baby draconequus, who replied with a giggle. "You'll be... my son... MY Strife."
One Hundred Years Later
"Happy hundredth birthday!" Discord shouted to Strife as he jumped out of a giant cake. Strife squealed in happiness. "You are now officially a centenarian! I'm just soo~ happy!" Discord said, picking up Strife and twirling him around. Strife was so small that he didn't even have his horns in yet, but he just LOVED chaos. "Now come on, let's cut the cake." Discord said happily, putting Strife on his head. Discord pulled out a giant butter knife and began to cut the cake.
Discord cut a small slice, big enough for Strife. Strife clapped his hands together teleporting the slice over to him. A grin bigger than any chaos could bring formed on Discord’s face. "YOU CAN CHAOS!?" He shouted happily, grabbing strife and hugging him. "Looks like we need to start your training." Strife happily squealed, and then he snatched the floating cake and began eating it. He also got more on himself and Discord than in his mouth, but they didn't care; today was a happy day. Yes, a happy day indeed. Discord started up a phonograph and happily played with his son.
Six Hundred Years Later
"Strife~" Discord said in a sing-song way as he creaked open his son’s door.
"Five more minutes?" Strife groaned into his pillow.
"Come on! Guess what day it is?~"
"Let Strife sleep in day?"
"Nooo~"
"Then I don't know."
"It's take your son to work day!" Discord said, happily kicking the door open.
The sudden slam made Strife fall out of his bed. "AHG-oohwf" he cried, hitting the floor.
"Phf-BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Discord fell to the floor, tears in his eyes.
"Shut-up!" Strife's voice cracked. Hearing the break in his son’s voice, Discord quickly slammed a paw to his mouth.
"ch-hahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"
"Can we just go to your work already?" Strife said angrily, walking past the now crying of laughter Discord.
"Oh, haha... of course. Let’s go!" and with a snap of Discord's claw they were at his throne. "Now let’s have some-" Discord’s entire body began to shake. "Oh no..."
"Dad, what's wrong?" Strife asked worriedly.
"Strife, two bad ponies are coming here to try and get me."
Strife's eyes widened with fear. "B-but you can take 'em, right?"
"Strife, don't worry. Both you and I know that I can take on anyone! Because I have a plan!" Discord then showed Strife a small bag with black seeds in it. "But I do need you to do something, alright?"
Strife gave a salute "Yes, sir!"
"I need you to hide and do not interfere. No matter what!"
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, now hide!"
Strife snapped his claw and disappeared. Discord sighed to himself, he knew that there was a high chance that he wouldn't be coming back. ‘However,’ he thought, ‘I must find a way, if not for anything else, for my son’. Discord grabbed his chair and turned it away from where the alicorns would be coming. He sat down and waited.
He heard their hoof-steps approach. He spun his chair around, "Oh, this is so much fun. How about a game of ‘Pin the Tail on the Pony’?" Discord mocked, showing them Celestia's tail in his paw. She let out a small gasp.
"Play time is over for you, Discord!"
"Oh I doubt that." He said, throwing some seeds into his mouth. "Hungry?" he asked, throwing a few at the alicorns, they didn't reply. "Suit yourselves," he said as he shoved a claw- full of seeds into his mouth.
The alicorns opened their bag and levitated three gems each. Discord was intrigued by this. "Oh, what have you got there?" He asked putting a claw to his chin.
"The Elements of Harmony." Said Celestia
"With them, we shall defeat you!" Luna said
"BAHAHA! You should see yourselves right now." Discord now knew he was going to win. "The expressions on your face. So intense. So sure of yourselves, Ahahah!" The two alicorns put their horns together, and a large rainbow swirled in the air. It launched itself at Discord "Hilarious!" As the magic hit him, he was turned to stone, his laughing pose frozen in time.
Strife sat there, his jaw literally hitting the floor. He didn't know what to think; he just saw his father just get murdered. 'I... don't know what to do,' he thought. For the first time in his seven hundred year life, he didn't know what to do. One thing was evident: he was angry. He didn't know what to do and he was absolutely livid. 'I'll KILL THEM!' he mentally shouted. With snap of his claws and a poof of smoke he was invisible. He crept up on the alicorns as they talked and he pulled out a long blade.
The two alicorns stood in amazement as the world around them changed to a grass plain. Houses fell from the sky back into place, fish stopped flying, and there was no more Discord.
"It's... wonderful," said Celestia.
"I never thought I would see the day," said Luna.
Strife was right behind them, he raised his blade and- stopped. He looked to his father and remembered what he was taught, 'You never kill. After all, it's just a joke,' he remembered. It was his father’s number one rule. Strife lowered his blade and he walked over to his father.
That's when he felt it, chaos. It was coming from the statue. His dad wasn't dead, just imprisoned. But the magic keeping him there was too strong. It would take a thousand years of chaos to break through that. Strife did the one thing that he could think to do and left. Before he left, he gave his dad a farewell gift: his father’s old phonograph, preloaded with his dad’s favorite song.
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Nice story so far I love it
4761739 Thank you it mean's a lot to hear that! :)
You sir, have made probably one of the best Discord/Human Realm stories so far! Here, have a spike mustache.
And a derpy.
2 Derpies.
This has potential! I like it!
4761762 Really? You mean it! Why, thank you! :)
You REALLY have to keep this story runnin'!
4761806 I'll do my best! You have my word! :)
Where did you get the story title image picture?
I'm putting this on favorite dont mame me regret this, ok?
4761823 Here you go! [Link] :)
mlpforums.com/uploads/post_images/img-2143481-1-335036.gif I'll follow this!!!
Hey hey hey, will there be another chapter soon?
4762428 I'll start working on it in the morning so hopefully it'll be out soon. :)
I love what I see so far. This is something I keep my eye on. (Just hope it's won't discontinued early on like similar fanfic.)
Ugh! I can't get over how bad the grammar is! There are missing or extra commas in places, poor punctuation, poor spelling, and poor capitalization all over the place.
Uh... Dude, good idea, but you might want some grammar editor/s to review it. I'd do it myself, but I'm really busy right now.
4762711 All I'm positive of right now is that it's better than when I didn't have an editor... I'm horrible at grammar and the such. and I'm still thinking of getting a second editor, just because no one man can handle my terrible grammar! :P
4762816
i.imgur.com/lU4njww.jpg
4763219 i806.photobucket.com/albums/yy349/luredin/Supernatural%20GIF%20Collection/deanholyshitsourceunknown.gif that's funny! I love it!
4763458 I've seen that movie... but I forget the name of it...
ooh, i hope you go with this and don't lost steam after 1-3 chapters. it's a fun idea!
I think you mean he realizes, not releases. In the description that is.
4764109 probably :P like I sad before I can't spell for shit...
i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/3826330368/hD99A7358/
4762437 Cewl!
4763261
That picture describes my feelings for the story.
I shalt be waiting.
I don't know why but I can't imagine the phonograph song as anything BUT This
4763103 that is what I'm sure many others are thinking as they read this.
didn't read yet, but heck, his abilities seem fun lol I volunteer to be your son lol
Actually is there a downside to his abilities? Crazyness? lol
Why am I even posting this! lol
Do go on, my dear chap.
4765008
I thought it would be this.
4767211
That song was a tad bit demented...
Thank you for showing me!
Make a 'Daughter of Chaos..."
4767211 oh god my sister's dad would torment her by singing this! I love this song. :)
Needs major editing... Lots of missing commas and many infractions of the "show, don't tell" rule... and that's just in the first 3 paragraphs.
I'll come back later when it's more presentable...
*flies away*
I hate to be a negative person but I can't see how this story is getting such good ratings from these people. The concept is somewhat new and felt rushed to me. Like, out of nowhere Discord decides to get a son, but I suppose his nature would allow quirks like that, if you can call it a quirk. The story did not immerse me, I felt like I was watching a play and not understanding what the theme was.
I'm just going to say, you really, really, really need an editor. Spelling is one of the things that I noticed, your usage of pronouns left me completely bored; rereading 'he' over and over again isn't really something what readers want. Your grammar did some sort of somersault at certain parts of the story, making me have to go and reread a part or two to make sure I wasn't seeing things. The way Discord did a lot of the things he did, also gave the air of a rushed story.
I'm not gonna lie I am interested in how Strife will affect Equestria but then again considering it's an alternate universe, if what the tag says is true, then Strife can go and kill everybody 'cause ya know, it's an alternate universe.
Oh well, all I'm trying to say is, get a good editor and pre-reader who know what they're doing and this story could come out all right.
P.S. God, I feel like the first critic to properly criticize this story... and it's on the featured box... how does that happen?
4771304 To be honest I don't know how it's getting such a good rating, I'm not a great writer. And the concept isn't new, and it is rushed(what can I say... I rush things). As well he didn't decided just to get a son, he went out to get a friend that loved chaos(Buts it seemed babies like chaos more) it was when he relied that the kid had his DNA he took it in, but it wasn't really clarified... But to be honest I know it needs an editor. and what's wrong with 'he' what did 'he' ever do to you 'he' right not any thing ELSE jk yeah it kind of does get repetitive. also my spelling its horrible I know. :( But the alternate universe tag is there because of Discord's "Not a Stargate". and I wish more people would criticize me! Like come ON! I'M CRAP!!! I want to get better at writing, so if people don't I'll never get better. So I thank you :D and finally what do you mean it's in the featured box? It's not there for me. and with aaaaaalllllll that say have a nice day!
4771667 It's on the side-feature bar, but maybe he just found it when it was featured.
4771667
Sorry I meant side feature box, just a simple error on my part. But I have noticed this happen with other not so good stories. It's as if people just don't care and like then go on with their day, not realizing what they're doing. That's just me though.
4772600 I just try to write because I like to write... and I did see it in the side feature box but I thought you meant the 'big box' but when I posted it I relied my stupidity... I can be really thick at times. :(
4772949
No, it's not your fault. It was my mistake and you took it as anyone else would. You're not stupid, but you do need to improve on your writing or get someone to help you.
Really liking this story so far. I don't know why there's people crying in the comments but don't let it stop you from continuing the story :)
4778255 it's okay, and I did get some one to help with all the problems! :D and now with him on this story, it will be 200% better :D the edited [E]chapter should be up now :) I think it's much better than the last.
4778914 the first chapter is all ready done it just need's some finale touches. :)
4781032
I'll give it a read and criticize it... prepare your anus...
I must say, it is already infinitely better than before. The story feels much more stretched out than it's counterpart but still it was rather fast; and I noticed a silly mistake.
It just cuts right there with a period. Not sure if the editor did this or you did it but you might wanna fix it as soon as you can. The story has more of a flow to it, and kept me mildly interested. Discord's personality felt more refined to me, and his thoughts seemed more conjoined then what you had.
I gotta say your editor did a wonderful job on fixing this part, for it really irked me the last time I read it. I really hope you can improve upon your skills as a writer so your editor doesn't need to work so hard. So for now, you have earned my favorite but it will be your later performance that will deem whether or not I choose to like your story. Just keep in mind I will be watching and I will be criticizing.
fc00.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/051/8/4/demi__ll_be_watching_you_by_guichearmo-d4qddfu.gif
VariousPotatoe, huh? Guess you gave up on GabrielDemarco1031 (My old account) jus' cause he went on a small vay-cay?