• Member Since 26th Sep, 2013
  • offline last seen Jan 9th, 2020

Tinybit92


Fangirl of Sunset Shimmer and Luna, sewer of fleece plushies, writes mainly oneshots.

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Source

Shadows of our mistakes can often follow us for a long time, sometimes even manifesting as voices in our heads. Unfortunately, the voice in Luna's head is a bit more aggressive than most, and it's all the worse when it catches her off guard.
The trick with such problems though, is to not repeat the same mistakes of the past. Luna's greatest mistake was thinking she had to face it alone.

Cover art is mine. Not really sure which category tags apply?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 6 )

I would recommend a Slice of Life tag, perhaps with a Dark or maybe Sad tag to go with it.

In any case, this is a touching piece about what it means to be a sister, to have someone to help you. Not much conflict resolution, but these things take a long time to resolve. Overall, a piece worth taking a look at.

I would probably tag this slice of life, or dark, considering Fimfictions annoying lack of a Drama tag.
As for the story itself, it was all right. Your Luna felt very immature here, which while not my favorite thing is not exactly uncommon. I just feel like Luna's eventual breakdown/moment with Celestia might have had more of an impact if we saw Luna put up more of a fight, so that we, the audience, could see that Luna was not weak, even if this wasn't something she could handle on her own. This felt more like the internal monologue of a foal Luna than the full grown mare we see in Luna Eclipsed/The actual opening of season 4.

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Yeah, I think that's probably my own problem with this fic too, I paced it weird. Since I imagine it to be set before the Nightmare Rarity arc of the comics, in which Luna's self-confidence is at a serious low, her attitude here made sense in my head, but I definitely rushed it. More build-up would certainly improve it if I can figure out precisely how. Thanks for the constructive criticism.

this should have a dark tag.

Comment posted by thesavior711 deleted Dec 7th, 2014

Great story. I have always wanted to see what Celestia would have done to comfort Luna, since half the fandom puts her in the "bad sister" role. Personally I think it should be a little longer, but again, it is my opinion and do not have to agree with me.
(Or maybe I just wanted more to read:twilightblush:)
I would suggest Dark, Slice of life and Sad for the tags.

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