Chapter 50: Dreams
Twilight lay flat on her back, staring up at the ceiling, feeling dazed and confused. There was no way that had just happened. She was still asleep, obviously. She just wished her subconscious wasn’t quite so cruel.
“Awww, that was great,” Pinkie said, sounding strangely chipper for the incredibly odd situation. “Thanks, Celly. I think I needed that.”
Celestia kissing me was bad enough, but Pinkie being happy about it? That decides it.
“Well, you two have a lot to talk about,” Pinkie said, causing Twilight to wince at how horribly forced the cheer in her voice was. “I’ll just let you get started. Lemme know when you want to have the ‘I found my soulmate party’!”
“Pinkie, this doesn’t change anything.”
That was Celestia, ever the voice of reason. Even in her dreams Celestia was calm and focused. The kissing was new, but in every other way, this was a perfect representation of her mentor. That had to be why she’d believed this dream instead of rejecting it outright.
There were some ponies who freely used the words ‘In your dreams’ to talk about something that could never happen, but that they wished for anyway. Twilight had never even dared to dream of something so horribly arrogant before. Kissing the princess had been a moment of weakness, both emotional and mental. But the princess kissing her? She felt ashamed of her own subconscious for even conceiving of it.
“Sure it does! She loves you, you love her. She didn’t know before, but now she does! Now you get to kiss and snuggle! Trust me, that’s the fun part!” Pinkie hesitated for a moment, then added: “You might need to get the costumes resized. But maybe Twi-twi won’t even want to use those anymore. I mean, you’re already the princess. And that one was her favorite.”
This is just abusive, Twilight thought, wincing. Dream Pinkie was clearly punishing her for her slip with Celestia. She deserved it, of course. While Pinkie had exhibited a notable confusion about interpersonal affection, Twilight had no such excuse. Kissing the princess had been a betrayal, and she knew it. But she wished her psyche wasn’t quite so effective in making her feel like dirt about it.
Twilight lifted a hoof experimentally, noting that she apparently had full range of motion in this dream, at least. She’d heard of lucid dreams before, but had never experienced one herself. It would have been fascinating if it wasn’t so horrifying. She pulled herself up into a sitting position, watching in wonder as Pinkie and Celestia argued over who was going to leave her with the other.
“Pinkie... the fact that she loves me doesn’t negate that she loves you. We’ve already had this discussion, remember?”
“Yeah, and it didn’t make much sense then, either! She gets so happy every time you’re around. You’re like her favorite pony ever!”
“I’m not just going to impose myself in your place, regardless of how she and I might feel.”
“It’s not imposing, you’re just making her happy!” Pinkie insisted, a huge grin on her face. “You two are so cute together! She likes magic, you like magic, you both like books and staying up late—”
“Are you or are you not the mare who broke into my castle and evaded my entire castle guard simply to tell her to come home?” Celestia replied with a huff. “It’s not all about shared interests. She adores you to the point where she fled to me because she thought she was the source of your unhappiness! And besides, as you seem to be able to talk to her about any number of subjects, I don’t see that as a problem.”
Twilight stood, regarding the two mares in silence. Her mind was trying to tell her something. Pinkie seemed... happy, but almost frantically so. Her smile was ratcheted up to what looked like a painful wideness, but her eyes were clouded with mixed emotions. There was some joy in them, but it was a bittersweet joy.
Celestia, meanwhile, looked exhausted. She wavered on unsteady hooves, and had resorted to drinking directly from the thermos rather than pouring a new cup. She seemed... annoyed more than anything. Though it was not quite an angry state of annoyance, more of an exasperation.
Which made sense, since this was her interpretation of Celestia interacting with her interpretation of Pinkie Pie, and since they were both part of her own mind, exasperation was a given. A fond exasperation, to be sure, but Pinkie could be just as infuriating as she was adorable. Worse, she had this annoying habit of being both at the same time. It was no surprise that whatever part of her Id was playing Pinkie’s role was hamming it up just as much as the real pony.
While it was interesting watching the two argue, since she seemed capable of acting freely, it behooved her to take some sort of action. Maybe she could still get something positive, or at least productive, out of her mind’s cruelty. It seemed a waste of her resting hours otherwise.
“As fascinating as all this is, I need both of you to stop arguing for a moment—” Twilight said as she got to her hooves.
“Well, yeah, but she doesn’t have to do it all wrong with you. You just get everything she says even when she says it in that adorkable nerdy talk she always uses!” Pinkie shot back. “And she kissed you with no costumes on. That means she likes you better!”
“Please, can you two just—”
“That doesn’t mean anything! Of course she has feelings for me, we both knew that—”
“Quiet!” Twilight screamed at the both of them, her hair becoming frazzled as the muscles in her neck bunched up in frustration.
They both fell silent, staring at her as she struggled to get her breathing and blood pressure under control.
“Okay,” she said at last. “I’m pretty sure I understand what’s going on, so I’d like to just cut to the chase and work this out quickly, if you don’t mind.”
She pointed at Celestia, who looked a little taken aback by her actions. She supposed this dream had a script and she was messing it up, but so be it. “Celestia, you’re clearly here as a representation of my unresolved feelings for the princess, my guilt over stealing a kiss from her, and probably some horribly narcissistic wish fulfillment. I need to get over my feelings of rejection, and accept that the princess loves me, but not in a romantic way. Though it’s kind of cruel that you seem more approachable than she is. The last thing I need is even more doubts about myself at a time like this, and the way you’re looking isn’t helping...”
“Which is?” Celestia asked, looking more than a little hurt.
“Adorable. Cute... Sexy.”
The dream Celestia actually blushed at that, the hurt look in her eyes exchanged for sudden startlement.
You need help in a bad way, Sparkle.
“Also a little fatigued,” Twilight added quickly, trying to ignore just how affected she was by that blush. “Which only serves to make me want to lay you down—”
The blush became more pronounced.
“And tuck you in... Ugh! Just shut up, Twilight!”
Pinkie squealed excitedly, jumping up and down, her earlier mixed feelings apparently subsumed by her interest in Twilight’s words. Twilight rolled her eyes at this further evidence of her own inflated feelings of self-love; clearly she had some very deep-seated issues to work through. “Ooo! Do me next! Me next! What do I represent?”
“Pinkie, clearly she’s not in her right mind. Don’t encourage her—” The princess began, before being cut off by Twilight.
“You represent my fears of being abandoned and rejected by the first pony I ever loved who actually returned my affections. You also seem to be feeding into my guilt complex, and simultaneously my ego. I knew I had fears before, but I guess I didn’t understand the depths of them.”
Pinkie cocked her head to one side, her wide smile faltering. “Why are you afraid, Twi-twi?”
Twilight took a deep breath, not quite believing she was humoring her own psyche. But if it wrapped things up quicker, she would indulge it as long as was necessary. “Because you’re incredibly accommodating to me and I’ve never felt comfortable about that. I guess that’s mostly because I have trouble understanding what you want so I can do the same for you, leaving me feeling unduly pampered and unfairly unreciprocating to your needs. It’s also inflated my ego to the point where I thought even the princess wouldn’t mind if I kissed her.” She tapped a hoof to her chin, considering. “At least, that’s what I assume happened. Otherwise, I can’t even account for what I could have been thinking. I mean... kissing the princess... you just don’t do that.”
Despite herself, Twilight’s eyes flashed to the princess, and she mouthed the words ‘I’m sorry’ to her. It was foolish, unneeded, and only further served to show how deep into her own plot she was, but it felt good. “I feel like a giant idiot right now because I’m essentially talking to myself, but there it is. Have I learned what I needed to from this scenario or do we need to keep going? I really want to wake up so that I can apologise to my marefriend and my...” She paused for a moment, furrowing her eyebrows. Celestia had become more than a mentor, or even a friend. “Crush?” She shrugged. “Whatever, I need to apologize for causing them all sorts of trouble and pain by running away all the time, so whatever the case, I want this to end.”
Disregarding the utter bafflement with which both Pinkie and Celestia regarded her, Twilight began walking around, looking in all directions for the guardian of dreams to come to her rescue. “Luna? Luna... Princess Luna? I know you can hear me! I understand, okay? I’ve been a terrible student and a terrible marefriend. I know you were upset with me before, but I had no idea that could even happen to the princess. I just wanted to help you and Rarity! Please, I need your help!”
She waited expectantly, only to let out a deep sigh when no answer came. She looked back at the two mares, resigned to her current predicament, for the moment. “I don’t suppose either of you would know a way out of this dream, would you?”
“Pinch yourself!” Pinkie helpfully suggested.
Twilight shook her head. “That would only let me know I was in a dream. It wouldn’t actually help me get out of it.”
“Stand on your head and drink a glass of water!” Pinkie spouted out quickly, then shook her head. “Wait, no. That’s hiccups.” She smiled apologetically. “Sorry, I usually just wait till I wake up, or dream up something else if I don’t like the one I’m in.” Her eyes lit up in a sudden thought. “Sometimes I visit other ponies. That’s super fun!”
“Twilight, you’re not dreaming—” Celestia attempted to interject before Twilight interrupted once more.
“Of course I am. Nothing else makes sense!” Twilight said with a grimace. “Celestia is... Celestia,” she finished, lamely. She began pacing back and forth in agitation. “And of course a dream would insist it wasn’t a dream. That doesn’t make any of this more believable.”
“Is that what you would prefer to believe?” Celestia asked. “Are you so sure of your lack of worth that even the thought of me returning your affections makes you question reality?”
“Yes!” Twilight responded angrily, genuinely upset with the figment from her mind for trying, even now, to trick her into thinking such a thing was possible. “It’s like the ancient tale of Sunbeam, the unicorn credited with the prototype for the Mistwing spell. She so loved the sky and the sun that she flew too high and plummeted for her hubris! Celestia is not meant for mere ponies! That’s why she...” Twilight knees failed her, and she collapsed bonelessly to the floor. “She can’t love me, because her love is for everypony. I was selfish, and foolish.”
“Twi-twi, don’t be sad,” Pinkie said from above her. She felt herself being lifted up by the other mare, and was quickly trying to gasp for breath because of the bone-crushing hug Pinkie placed her in. “Celly loves you soooo much. Like, more than she knows how to say. And this isn’t a dream. If it was, the blue rubber ducky would have shown up by now.”
Twilight sputtered helplessly as she struggled in Pinkie’s death-grip. “What... are you... talking about?” She asked when she was able to get a breath inside of her.
“That’s how I know I’m dreaming, silly. Now, don’t you want to tell her you love her back?”
“Of course I love her!” Twilight cried out, squirming out of Pinkie’s grasp. “I’ve always loved her. But I... I know she can’t return my feelings, so I’ve tried not to bother her with them. It’s just harder now. I can’t just ignore it like I used to.” She finally stopped struggling, just looking at Pinkie as the other mare smiled a sad little smile at her. “But I love you too, Pinkie. I love you, and it hurts me that I hurt you because I’m so stupid sometimes. You deserve so much better than me, and all I can offer is...” She gestured to herself, giving Pinkie a sad smile to match the one Pinkie wore. “Me. I wish I was a better pony. As a marefriend, I’m probably the worst there is.”
“Nuh-uh! I’m the worstest here, not you! I made you cry and run away!” Pinkie protested, her look of sad confusion turning to horror. “I just didn’t know I was hurting you, just like Celly didn’t know when you brought her that card. I mean, I told her it’s not as bad when you don’t know...” Her ears wilted back, but she pressed on: “But I don’t think it’s much better, because I... I should have known. I really like kisses and snuggles; they make me feel good. And I like all my friends, so kissing and snuggling them felt almost as good as kissing and snuggling you! But I should have known it made you feel bad when it wasn’t... with you. I’m so sorry for being worstest, Twi-twi.”
“Pinkie, you’re not—”
“That’s why when Celly told me she loved you I was so happy for you, because she’s such a nice pony and she’s so sad, Twilight. She needs somepony to make her smile, and I just know she can make you happy too!” Pinkie gave her an extra squeeze, then let her go. “She keeps saying she doesn’t want to, though. I don’t understand. If she loves you, and you love her, that’s supposed to be perfect!”
“What are you talking about?” Twilight demanded. “When did she tell you that?”
“She took me way up high on a mountain after you went away the other night, and we talked for a long time. She was really mad at first, and she told me I was hurting you, and that’s why you ran away. We talked and talked, and she helped me figure out how I was being worstest. That’s when she told me she loved you. I mean, I kinda guessed, but she did tell me, then she asked me not to tell you. Then I told her she should tell you, so you could be happy together. Then you could be with the bestest instead of the worstest!”
“No... this is a dream, Pinkie! None of those things happened.”
“Then, later on, she told me about how you two were peeking into each other’s heads while you were drinking coffee or something.” Pinkie giggled at that. “It sounded fun, but I think it made her sad. And then she said you kissed her.”
“That... that could have just come from my memories,” Twilight stammered, her eyes wide. ”This has to be a dream—”
“She said you saw when she got her cutiemark, and she saw when you got yours—”
“She did?” Twilight exclaimed, not sure how she felt about that. “Wait... no, no no! You’re not… you’re just my Id trying to confuse me—”
“Nopers, you’ve been ranting like a crazy mare right in front of Celly! But it’s okay. I think Celly’s a little loopy too, aren’t you…?”
She turned, intent on asking Celestia a question, and as she did so, Twilight finally noticed that her mentor was sprawled on the floor.
“Hey, don’t nap yet, or at least wait till we all get upstairs!” Pinkie said, having scrambled over to the princess and nudged her gently with a hoof.
After a few attempts, she turned helplessly back to Twilight, who could feel her eyes twitching even as she reevaluated this entire scene in a new light.
“She won’t wake up!” Pinkie said, trying to lift one of Celestia’s forelegs, only to let it come back down gently when the princess didn’t stir. “I don’t understand; that was Mr. Cake’s best blend, guaranteed to give you the zip you need when you need it.” She rushed back to the table, sniffing the thermos experimentally. “Nope, not decaf. And she drank the whole thing!”
“I... I told her she was sexy...” Twilight murmured, her eyes widening while her pupils shrunk to tiny points.
“Yep, and cute, and adorable!” Pinkie replied, “But that’s not important right now! She won’t wake up, Twilight! She should be jittering and bouncing all over the place with this much coffee in her! Can you check if she’s okay?”
Twilight just stared straight ahead for a moment longer, then visibly shook herself. “What do you mean?”
“I mean she won’t wake up!” Pinkie repeated, nuzzling into Celestia’s cheek. “She’s out like a log! Here, lemme check something.” Pinkie produced a mirror from her mane, holding it up to the princess’s nostrils. “Okay, she’s breathing. That’s good.”
“Pinkie,” Twilight said, still trying to come to grips with the idea that none of the things that had so confused her had happened because she was dreaming. “I’m... I’m sorry I said all of those things—”
“Later, Twi-twi. It’s fine, really. But first can you come over here and use that horn to see if anything is wrong?” Pinkie put the mirror away, pressing her head to the princess’s chest. “Heartbeat is... not that fast. Weird. Maybe coffee doesn’t really do much for her? My heart would be hammering its way out of my chest right about now.”
“Right! Right,” Twilight replied, scrambling her way to Pinkie’s side. There would be time later to worry about all the stupid and insensitive things she’d said right to Celestia’s face. Plenty of time to stress over, and make up for, later. Also, she’d have time to come to terms with the fact that somehow, Celestia had feelings for her, for horrible Twilight Sparkle.
Has to be a dream. Or maybe an elaborate joke. Or both.
“Twilight!”
“Coming!” Twilight said, hurriedly. For the moment, she had to accept everything presented as reality. But if she did wake up in a few moments, she wasn’t sure if she’d want to hug Luna, or set her on fire.
Probably the first one, then the other.
Luna let out a tiny little squeal, which, fortunately, could only be heard by Middy. She hadn’t realized just how much she’d missed Fancy and Fleur until seeing them at that moment.
“Hello, Sir Pants! Have you come to petition the court?” she called down, trying to maintain her demeanor.
“Actually, I just stopped by to inquire about you, to be honest. With Celestia out of commision I admit I was a bit concerned.” Fancy chuckled lightly. “Looks like you have things in order, and the sun is up and shining, after all. Bit more moon and clouds than I normally expect, but the change was wonderfully entertaining!”
“We... we are fine, Sir Pants. We merely attempt to fill our sister’s horseshoes as best we may.”
“Are you certain, mon amie? You seemed a bit upset,” Fleur asked, her voice filled with a combination of concern and good-natured humor. “Would it be too forward to request a personal meeting later on?”
Luna hesitated a moment more before opening her wings. “Middy, I’m going down there. Meet me at the bottom, won’t you?”
Without waiting for an answer, she dove down, breaking her fall with great gusts of down thrusts from her wings. Fleur and Fancy just stood there, bearing up under the sudden wind with no evident concern. “Hello, my friends,” she said, quietly. “Thank you for coming.”
“So formal, ma chérie?” Fleur said with a saucy wink. At Luna’s answering blush, she relented with a little laugh. “Sorry, ma petite princesse. I presume too much. You are all right, are you not?”
“I’ve been better, to be honest,” Luna replied with a wince. “Would that it were myself recovering instead of my sister, but she did spend a thousand years ruling our country alone. I believe I can do the same for the few weeks it will take her to recover.”
“A few weeks, you say?” Fancy Pants’ eyebrows rose very slightly. “Troublesome, but the people should settle down when they hear that much. Rumors abound that she’s been kidnapped and that you’ve been mind-controlled by changeling infiltrators.”
“Why do they always blame the changelings?” Luna said with a roll of her eyes. “My niece bested them with the power of love, for goodness sake, and they eat love! That’s like defeating my sister with donuts. The country has faced far greater threats; a living, breathing incarnation of chaos, for instance.”
“I suspect it’s the infiltration aspect that fascinates them,” Fancy Pants answered her with a thoughtful look. “Discord wasn’t exactly subtle. A changeling could be anyone, even your own family.”
“As if shape-changing were so very difficult.” Luna scoffed. “Chrysalis was a fraud who used stolen power to challenge her betters. Mention her not.”
“To be sure! But that doesn’t stop them from being frightened” Fancy Pants glanced behind himself at the crowd. “They don’t know what to make of you. It’s a wonder they didn’t come here with torches and pitchforks.”
“Let them try,” Luna said with glee. “I would strike them down with great pleasure—”
Fleur approached her quietly, placing a hoof on her right foreleg. “Ma chérie, they did not come to challenge you. They came here to you for reassurance. Princess Celestia is, to many, a constant source of solace for their day to day lives. Even her temporary absence worries them.”
Luna was ready to protest angrily, but her eyes caught those of a small filly who was peeking around her mother’s legs. Upon meeting the princess’ eyes, she darted back behind her mother.
Her anger forgotten, she looked upon the mob in a new light. She saw fear in many of their eyes. Fear and confusion. Fancy was right; they did not know what to think of her.
She looked down at the hoof on her foreleg, and back up to the pony attached to it. Fleur did not look unsure, or afraid. Her expression was one that spoke of amusement, and friendliness.
“They have come here because you asked them to. They have faith in you. Will you not return their trust in kind?”
Luna hesitated, unsure. That was her sister’s way. But she had the love of the people, and had no fear of them. Which was not to say that Luna feared these ponies, but rather, feared how they would react to her, the lesser sister.
“Please, Luna.” Fleur said softly. “They need you, we all do.”
The princess took a deep breath, feeling a shiver pass down her spine. She then stepped forward, walking slowly toward the crowd.
They parted before her, ponies stumbling over themselves to give her space.
Luna stopped a scant few feet in front of them, and she lent just a little power to her voice, just enough to be heard throughout the courtyard. “Hello, my little ponies. Are there any amongst you who came for any reason other than to check on my sister’s health?”
For a time, no one moved, but eventually Luna saw a very small hoof waving over the crowd. She ascended, rising slowly over the crowd so as not to startle them. Soon, she was hovering near the source of the hoof, and was confronted by the curious eyes of a foal held aloft by her mother. “Yes, little one, you had a question?”
Every tiny murmur in the crowd in the crowd stilled as the filly spoke up. “Um... Princess Luna, are you okay?”
The question took Luna aback, and she did not answer right away. “I am fine, little one.”
“Oh, that’s good,” the filly said with a smile.
“Was that your only question?”
The filly nodded. “Yep, that was it,” she hesitated, then added: “Thank you for saving me from my bad dream.”
Luna blinked, then smiled very gently. “Of course, little one.” She turned from the foal as she was lowered gently back to her mother. “Does anypony else have a question?” she asked of the crowd at large. Several tentative hooves were raised into the air, and Luna could swear she knew their question without even having to talk to the ponies. “A question that isn’t related to my sister,” she clarified, and watched all of the hooves disappear into the crowd once more.
Luna sighed heavily. “My citizens, my sister performed a great deed. Verily, she saved two lives at great cost to her own health.”
The crowd began to murmur in panic.
“Fret not!” she said, with just a hint of power. “She will recover quickly. But she must rest, so that she might return to you hale and hearty once more.”
A single, hesitant hoof rose, and Luna recognized one of Celestia’s personal staff. It was the servant that brought tea for her sister several times per day. “Yes?”
“Where is Her Majesty? She simply left in the dead of night, and all of her staff have been worried for her since. We would happily travel to her, to aid in her recovery.”
“She is currently in very good hooves, madam tea pony. You may tell your fellows that their services will continue to be needed, as dusting and other such menial tasks will still be required until Celestia’s return. Those of you who brought meals or the like...” She paused, considering what she would have them do, then her eyes lit up. “You will be tasked with making certain that Regent Midnight Oil takes his meals and tea! He doesn’t eat very well, you see. I trust you will help him with that?”
“Errr, yes, of course. I... will inform the staff...”
“Excellent!” Luna said, smiling and clapping her hooves. “Oh, and... I suppose we should have some sort of meeting with the Day Guard...” She looked around. “Middy, have you made it down here yet?”
“I am here, majesty!” Midnight called from the outer edge of the crowd.
Luna squinted, and upon spotting him, lifted him up in her magic to float next to her above the crowd. “Good, good. Make a note that we’ll need to reassign the Day Guard—”
“Why?” Midnight asked, sounding defeated and exhausted. Luna made a mental note that Middy needed a nap.
“Well, they are Celestia’s guard,” she replied.
“They are also the standing army and guards of the castle, Your Majesty. Guarding the princess is but one of their tasks.”
Luna blinked at him for a moment. She should have known that. “Ah. Well, we’ll still need to let them know Celestia is safe.”
“Majesty, there may be a better time to discuss this, perhaps? You do have a large percentage of the city waiting to be addressed.” Midnight reached into his saddlebags for a notepad, dutifully took a note about the Day Guard.
Luna looked down at the sea of faces just below her hooves. In fairness to herself, she had only forgotten them because they were being dutifully silent. But Middy had a point; they were here to have their concerns put to rest, not to watch her give orders to Middy and the rest of the castle staff. “Erm, yes. So, Celestia is in good hooves, and will return when she is well. Are there any other concerns? If not, please feel free to go about your lives once more.”
The crowd began milling about, apparently intent on going back to their homes and lives, but one hoof did raise itself from amongst them.
“Yes?” Luna asked, raising the pony attached to the hoof up in her magic.
The pony in question was a bookish sort, the kind that looked well at home in a library or teaching a classroom. His coat and mane were a nondescript gray and his cutie mark was a sundial. “Majesty... thank you for acknowledging me, most kind of you...” He took his glasses off with him magic, polishing them quickly on his lapel.
“You are welcome, citizen,” Luna replied. “Perhaps you’d like to ask your question, now?”
“Hmmm?” he replied, then stammered as he apparently realized he had forgotten a step. “Oh, yes! I... I was actually wondering if you might be willing to... errr... raise the sun a little later, tomorrow.”
Luna just looked at him for moment, unsure if he was serious. He seemed the earnest type, to look at him; he’d likely never considered telling a joke in his life. “I’m afraid that’s impossible, though I can’t say I mislike the idea of a little more nighttime. The solar and lunar cycle is very carefully balanced.”
“Yes. Yes, I know.” He brought forth a small blackboard from a satchel on his back. “That’s precisely my concern. The moon exhibited some very unusual activity yesterday and my hope was to offset the difference. We’ll need a slightly longer night for the next week or so, with a carefully calibrated moon cycle, to put things aright. The sun, likewise, would need to be sped up a trifle—”
Luna listened to the pony drone on and on about sky movements and calendars, feeling horribly drowsy. She shook herself, trying to maintain her composure. “This... is very interesting, but ‘tis something we shall have to discuss at another time. Middy, make a note to set an appointment with this stallion at some point in the near future.”
She set the stallion down, and after a brief moment of surprise that he was on his hooves again, he thanked Luna and joined the rest of the crowd as they milled out.
Luna remained aloft, watching as the last of her citizens left, and as the guards closed the gates, she allowed herself to return to earth with a long-held exhalation.
A pair of hooves stomping on the ground could be heard behind her, and she turned to see Fancy Pants and Fleur de Lis smiling at her.
“Well done, Your Majesty.”
“You were marvelous, ma chérie!”
Midnight Oil let out a tiny cough to her side. His mouth was twisted into an expression of slight annoyance when she turned to him. “Yes, well, considering the circumstances, you did well. Though I would ask that you have more care in the future. Your success today was in extricating yourself from the bind you placed yourself into, after all.”
She did her best to look contrite, and it was only spoiled a little by the grin she flashed him. “Yes, Middy.”
Rarity wasn’t entirely certain how long she had napped. Truthfully, she hadn’t been aware she’d fallen asleep at all. The couch was still warm in the spot where Fluttershy had been sitting, but the mare herself had gotten up, apparently.
“Sweetness?” she called out, but if Fluttershy heard her, she gave no indication.
Fortunately, there were a limited number of places her love would be, and her first guess proved to be correct as she found Fluttershy humming to herself while brewing tea and making a light dinner.
Rarity smiled mischieviously as she crept up behind Fluttershy, intent on swiftly wrapping her forelegs around the other mare.
That was the intent, at least. What actually happened consisted of her sneaking up, quiet as a mouse. Then she stepped on a loose walnut that had fallen from the counter as Fluttershy made her salad, startling her, which caused her wings to fly up in alarm, smacking Rarity in the face in the process and knocking her prone on the floor.
Fluttershy whirled around, eyes closed, swinging a wooden spoon wildly in random directions. After hitting nothing but air, she opened her eyes in confusion, looking for her assailant.
Rarity picked herself up on one elbow, shaking her head to clear it from the little sparkling lights at the corner of her eyes.
“Oof.”
The noise drew Fluttershy’s attention, and she dropped the spoon in sudden horror. “Oh my goodness! Are you all right? You scared me!”
“Forgive me, darling.” Rarity said sheepishly as she sat up, getting to her haunches. “You were just so adorable I wanted to hug you.” She peeked past Fluttershy curiously. “So, what’s for dinner?”
“What?” Fluttershy asked, apparently startled anew at the sudden change in subject. “Oh, it’s nothing special. I had some nice dried cranberries from last fall; the beavers gather them for me. Then I mixed it with some walnuts from the squirrels, and some nice cheese I got from the market. The recipe book I got for Angel has so many things he won’t eat, but I think they’re very nice.”
“Sounds lovely,” Rarity said with a grin. She finally picked herself up and closed the distance between them, giving Fluttershy the hug and kiss she’d been trying to deliver, which were returned enthusiastically. “Anything I can do to help?”
“Um...” Fluttershy twisted around in her grasp to look at the counter, considering. “No, I think everything is ready...” She smiled as she thought of something. “Oh! I know, you can uncork the cider bottle I have in the ice chest. I... I thought it would be nice to celebrate being home and safe.”
“I can do that,” Rarity said judiciously, releasing Fluttershy and walking to the cupboards to gather two glasses and a corkscrew. As she opened the ice chest, she looked back over her shoulder as her love placed the salads on a serving tray. “By the way, did you have a chance to talk to Angel, yet?”
“Yes!” Fluttershy exclaimed happily. “I… I’m not sure what you said to him, but he seemed to be much less grumpy than usual.”
Rarity allowed herself a small, triumphant look of glee. She’d gotten to him after all! “He’s a good little fellow when you get to know him. And we have something in common.”
“Oh?” Fluttershy asked.
“We both think the world of you, darling.”
Fluttershy blushed, apparently unsure what to say. She opted to pick up the tray instead, taking it to the living room.
They settled down for dinner, enjoying the meal and each other's company. While eating, they chatted about various little inconsequentials. Fluttershy about the upcoming butterfly migrations, Rarity about summer trends she would need to research.
“Oh, sweet sisters, the order!” Rarity exclaimed as she realized something she’d lost sight of because of various distractions, one of which was drinking cider across the table from her. “I need to get in touch with Princess Luna about the materials she gave me, and I still have so many dresses to finish!”
Fluttershy frowned at the interruption, but quickly brought her mouth up into an understanding smile. “Rarity, it’s fine. You got a lot done while we were in Canterlot. You finished about half of them and have pre-cut material for the rest. Luna promised she would send everything to you.”
“I... I did?” Rarity asked, blinking. “I... I do remember... something.”
“You were very… energetic,” Fluttershy replied, calmly taking a bite of salad.
“I must have been.” Rarity looked down at her own salad, pecking away at it. “I suppose I’ll need to get in touch with Princess Luna about how she plans to ship them, and with the construction company about the shop. Then everything will finally be back to normal.”
“You... you don’t want to stay here, with me?” Fluttershy asked, looking a little hurt.
“Well... I’ll certainly be by to visit quite often, but I really do need to get my house back in order, so to speak.” Seeing how her answer seemed to sadden Fluttershy, she added: “Darling, I know things have moved very swiftly, but we’re two grown mares with lives and occupations. We can’t spend every waking moment doting on each other, as wonderful as that sounds. But don’t fret. There will be plenty of time for us to spend together.”
Fluttershy simply nursed her drink, not saying anything for a long time. “Sorry. I… I had just gotten used to you being around me. It’s been like a nice dream, even if some parts weren't so nice. I was hoping maybe you’d stay.”
Rarity smiled brightly. “Darling, I didn’t mean now! My shop has a large hole where the top story used to be, water and fire damage from both before and after the storm, and everything I need to work on is still in Canterlot, for goodness sake!” She tittered into her hoof. “No, we’ll have time yet before I need to go, and even after my home is repaired I’ll need your help to finish up the stitching.”
“Oh!” Fluttershy said, lifting her head with a slow smile. “That’s… that’s nice.”
“Unless I’m imposing, of course,” Rarity said, her eyes twinkling with amusement. “I could inquire with my parents and see if father could put me up in his study for a while—”
“No!” Fluttershy said, very quickly. “No...I wouldn’t want you to impose on them, either. I have plenty of room here.”
“Ah, good. Shall I take the couch, then?”
Fluttershy just pouted at her.
“Fine, fine. I suppose you do have a nice cozy bed. We’ll just have to snuggle close.” Rarity poured herself another glass of cider, taking a nice, deep draught. “Well, even if I won’t be leaving, I do have a few errands to run in the morning. We could make an early night of it, if you like.”
The suggestion caused Fluttershy to look at her in confusion. She finished off her cider, her cheeks a nice rosy color, her stance slightly wobbly which spoke of slight inebriation and fatigue. “I... I think it might be a little early to sleep,” she said at last.
Rarity got up, gathering their dishes and depositing them in the sink in the other room. She then walked around the table, leaning in close to Fluttershy’s ear. “I never said anything about sleeping, sweetness.” She whispered, nipping at the tip of Fluttershy’s ear. “Race you to the bedroom?”
All in all, Rainbow would have been proud of them for how fast they managed to get up the stairs. Though neither really paid much attention to who had won as they fell into each other’s arms, kissing. But then, nopony really lost in such races.
“Has she woken up?” Pinkie asked as she opened the door to the bedroom.
“No.” Twilight replied, her eyes bloodshot and hollow. She picked up another textbook, opening it to a specific bookmarked page. “No. She hasn’t.”
Pinkie gave Twilight a worried look, but didn’t try to cheer her up by being silly. It would have only made Twilight more upset that Pinkie wasn’t taking things seriously. Pinkie Pie knew about serious business, it made ponies all scrunchy-faced and frustrated, which was why she usually tried to make them laugh. But it was different with Twilight. Being scrunchy faced and frustrated was normal for her, and when things were serious it only got worse. So... the best she could do for Twilight was to try to help however she could, even if it hurt her heart to watch Twilight tear herself up. “Do you know what’s wrong, yet?”
“Nothing, medically.” Twilight replied with a sigh. She closed the book, setting it aside and taking the coffee Pinkie had poured with a nod of thanks. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Should we take her to the hospital?” Pinkie asked quietly.
“I just said—” Twilight cut herself off as Pinkie’s ears went flat. “Sorry… I didn’t mean to be loud. But there’s nothing wrong with her that they could find with the basic diagnostic spells. I know because I’ve tried all of them.”
Pinkie nodded quietly, sitting on the bed next to Celestia, putting a hoof on her barrel. The princess’s chest rose and fell steadily under her hoof, and she could feel a steady heartbeat thudding away. A worry had been pestering her since the princess had fallen. She hadn’t had the courage to voice it before, but knowing Twilight had tried everything else, she did so now. “Twilight... do you think I did this to her?”
There was a long silence before Twilight spoke, making Pinkie very nervous. But Twilight didn’t sound angry when she finally spoke, just confused. “How could you possibly have done anything to her to cause this?”
“Well... earlier, before you woke up, I was telling her how happy you two would be together, and she... she started yelling.” Pinkie held her head like Celestia had been holding hers. “ ‘No, stop!’ “ She cast Twilight a nervous glance, not sure how she’d react to this news. “It was like I was hurting her.”
“That’s... very strange.” Twilight replied, looking back at Celestia’s prone form. “But I don’t see how you could have hurt her just by making suggestions.”
She continued to look at the princess, her expression growing more troubled. “Actually, she looked... panicked when I came downstairs. I’ve never seen her look like that. Worried, but not panicked.”
“I know! It was so weird! Like... when I came downstairs, she was talking to herself! I mean, that’s not so weird, but I feel like maybe it’s weird for a princess? Celly’s been really frazzled, though, so maybe she was just tired?”
Twilight turned from Celestia in surprise. “What was she saying?”
“Well, I didn’t hear all of it. I could just hear her say something like she was talking to somepony else,” Pinkie replied, putting a hoof up to her chin as she thought back. “I only actually heard her say ‘She deserves the best.’ and I was all ‘Who does?’ and she said ‘Twilight’ and I was all “Oh yeah, totally, Twi-Twi’s the bestest!’—”
“Pinkie!” Twilight said, raising her voice, “I need you to focus. Was that all she said?”
Pinkie hesitated, not sure what Twilight wanted to know. “Well... no. She said a bunch more stuff about coffee and thermoseses because she was trying to explain all that stuff you two did when you helped Rarity and Luna.”
“That’s... that’s not what I meant.” Twilight tapped thoughtfully on the bed with a hoof. “You said she was very angry at you on the mountaintop?”
“Yeah...” Pinkie replied, her hair falling a little just thinking about it. “She was mad because I upset you. I’m sorry about that—”
“It’s okay, Pinkie! That’s not why I asked.” Twilight sat in silence for some time. “Was she acting strangely then, too?”
Pinkie just shrugged helplessly. She didn’t know the princess well enough to say what was strange.
“Right.” Twilight sighed in resignation. “How would you know? Ugh...” She let both hooves come to rest on the bed, her whole posture slumping. “I can’t really say for sure, either. I used to think I knew her. Now, I... I don’t know anymore.”
She looked down at the resting body of the princess. “Seeing the Princess angry... I still can't believe it. I mean, I blew up the northern tower a few years ago. She barely batted an eye. But when she was trying to raise the sun, I felt how frustrated she was. She kept thinking about how many times she'd tried... I saw her angry, then. She was stomping her hooves and screaming!" A small smile tugged at the edges of her mouth, Celestia had been adorable even in her rage. "I mean... I knew I didn't know everything about the princess... she's lived so long and..." She paused again, taking a deep breath. "I guess I just didn't know how much I didn't know..."
Pinkie scooted closer to Twilight, throwing a foreleg around her and drawing her close. “You’re just seeing things she doesn’t want ponies to see. When you’re a big important princess you don’t get to have bad days, or be sad, or need coffee. Or fall in love.”
“She doesn’t... she can’t—”
“She does, and she can so,” Pinkie said, pressing a hoof to Twilight’s lips. “It’s really easy to love you. I should know!”
Twilight stared at the hoof, then at Pinkie. She turned away, looking at the floor, and didn’t say anything at all.
“Twi-Twi?” Pinkie asked, removing the foreleg in panic. She’d done something wrong, she knew it, but she didn’t know what.
“Pinkie... earlier, I was sure I was dreaming, but if I’m not... Why were you trying to leave?”
Pinkie relaxed just a little. At least Twilight had asked a question she could answer. Maybe she hadn’t messed up that badly after all. “Because I love you, and I want you to be happy.”
“Why?” Twilight demanded, turning to her again, her eyes red and puffy.
“Because...” Pinkie paused, at a loss for where to begin. There were so many answers to that question. So many that she’d made up a blackboard for them in her head, alongside all the birthdays and friend’s names she had to remember. ”Because you’re cute when you’re sleeping. You have this little tiny snore, but it’s not like a regular snore, it’s like you’re saying to the whole room ‘I’m so happy I’m sleeping!’” She closed her eyes for a moment, sneaking another peek at the blackboard. “Ooo! That’s a good one! You do this little hoof shake with your left hind leg when I kiss you, it’s how I know you’re having fun. And—”
“Pinkie!” Twilight threw her arms around Pinkie’s neck, she could feel hot, wet drops falling on her shoulder.
Pinkie didn’t understand. She’d just been trying to explain to Twilight why she loved her. She still had a big list to go over, and Twilight loved lists!
“You can’t make me h-happy by leaving me,” Twilight whispered into her mane.
Oh.
“But… but Celly’s better than—”
“Stop.”
Pinkie dutifully closed her mouth, but she remained troubled. Twilight had to have the bestest marefriend, or she wouldn’t be happy.
Twilight held onto Pinkie tightly, her ragged breathing calming down. After a moment, she had fallen asleep, but Pinkie remained awake, chewing her lip in thoughtful agitation.
How am I supposed to make her happy now?
She yawned loudly, feeling the fatigue of too many hours weighing her eyelids down. Maybe it was okay to sleep for a while.
Okie-dokie, just a little nap.
She gently laid Twilight down, laying down next to her and closing her eyes. When next she opened them she was laying down on a comfy cloud, watching the ground pass by far below her.
A chorus of squeaks sounded out. Her eyes flicked to the source to see a flock of blue rubber duckies flying by.
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6271510 Glad to hear it!
6271545 Only one way to fix that, EF.
6271570 You're not, though. You can write. Hell, you are your own collaborator and editor. The only way to get back to writing consistently is... to write consistently.
6271596
You can do it, EF. I know, because you have done it before. Just have some faith in yourself and get to it.
Ah, just in time. I needed my regular hit of rarishy goodness.
Also:
I love it when alicorns get all übermensch. People just seem to forget that they're basically gods.
I missed reading this story. It was wonderful as usual. Just one thing.
It makes sense HE would have some knowledge of people. Nopony wears pants. But still, I'm not sure anyone else would...
6272065 You have to think multi-culturally my dear. Canterlot is home to more than just ponies. The griffons get upset when you call them ponies, for instance.
People or ponies?
Celestia can't be romantically in love with Twilight because she knows she'll outlive her.
When the new chapter came out I was all 'yay! Finally a resolution of the Celestia-Twilight romance!'
Then I read the chapter....
6272575 In Canterlot, there are more than ponies.
6272647 Well, we still had a couple problems there. Pinkie was intent on just turning it over to Twilestia, and Twilight was convinced she was dreaming the whole thing.
Ma chère. Luna is female. The above is male :P
Commence read.
Just when some things have been coming together.
Regardless of my vote for "favorite character", there are so many times that I feel it's undeniable that Pinkie is best pone.
This is one of those times.
But seriously, you nailed the feels in this chapter, especially when it comes to Pinkie. Still love the story. Hope it, like the ride, never ends.
Whooo, what a chapter. Full of Drama-mama's 8D
Heeheehee, nice job man, nice job!
This is escalating greatly~ :D
Keep it going brosef!
6272575 Love is rather selfish. It doesn't care about fears of the future. It wants what it wants.
well at least pinkie is on to something ...
i wonder if the voice has taken over celestias body when she wakes up ...
6273769 Ah, the perils of Google translate. Thanks, Tchern.
Ooooooh, can't wait for what happens neeeeeext!
6271596
Psst...
TKaG.
Do eet.
Change to "be", and there needs to be an 'ed' on the end
Uh...
That would imply that Shining Armor was her brother, unless there was another changeling invasion. Aren't Luna and Celestia both Cadence's aunts? So isn't she their niece? I'm going to just assume typo.
6274234
I would guess they have just entered the limbo for dominance.
So many things happening! Well, at least Luna got herself out of her own conundrum. Now to solve the bajillion more during the day to day rulings.
The worst now is Twi, Pinks and Tia. That will probably be long winded, and I'm looking to every single moment reading it
6281044 Quite right, not entirely sure why I got that wrong.
6281153
DEATH BATTLE!
That was great
I also love how Rarity reasoned for turning in early 
Now Celestia is in a coma of some sort and that can't be good 
I hope they can help Celeestia soon or I have a feeling Luna will have to take over forever 
I WNAT MOAR SOON! 
If that is alright with you. 
6286506 Not quite a coma. She was exhausted, magically drained, and stressed. And to make it worse, she was using what little magic she had to shield her mind from that pesky voice.
... So, the biggest thing I took away from this chapter is:
Luna is even more adorkable and awkward than Twilight is.
Also if Celestia goes Nightmare because of a love triangle, I'm pretty sure the whole of history is going to laugh their tails off. And Cadence is going to be so disappointed in her.
6296171 i.imgur.com/tkMRq.png
'Tis not polite to make fun. We are doing the best we can.
. . .
And here I thought the author chose their name because it sounded cool. Obviously it's a warning for reading their stories. Gotta have some serious mental fortitude or risk turning into a liquid pride sprinkler.
6312008 Emotional scenes are a blast to write. Especially ones involving Pinkie Pie.
6334363
Eheh... yeah, I never claimed any knowledge of real-world military, but then, who is to say how things work in a land of talking ponies? That being said, none of this was ever going to be fair to Rarity, that wasn't the point. I'm glad you were able to ignore my woefully inaccurate portrayal of anything resembling proper training/testing and still enjoy the story.
6341432 Perhaps, but Rarity is stubborn. Love has lead many of us to folly.
6348200 She really needs a pyro mark or something, I mean legit XD she sets so much stuff on fire that can't be set one fire.
Its hilarious. That's talent kiddo.
6349963
That's too true. She really needs to get a pyro mark. Then her and Aegis [from the Hive Series] can be pyro buddies.
6355642
Sorry I didn't reply to your comments to now. They didn't show up on my notifications, and I just saw them when scanning the main pages comment section
. I'll get to replying now.
Yeah Flutters can be deceitful if its for something's 'own good'. But didn't Luna tell her [on two occassions (pre and post mess up)] that she had no intention of breaking them up, and she would only go as far as both wanted to (after spending time to be with them as friends)? I mean Luna was very up front that she never wanted to get between them. But noticed Flutter's attraction, and wanted to woo both of them. Not one or the other.
Yet Flutters ignores that repeatedly ... I get that she's industrial strength possessive. But her eventual lying to Rares and not learning the lesson she thought of earlier (not being able to balance extremes and it always landing her in trouble). It's going to bite her in the butt, and I feel bad about the train wreck coming.
___________________
6356968
Yes, bottling anger can't ever go wrong in the history of ever. Surely Nightmare Moon wasn't caused repressed feelings, it was all every other ponies fault. Yep, definitely not because of repression, and if you can't trust Nightmare Moon who can you trust? She was once the Element of Honesty.
6357558
Seriously? Well ... that is interesting. Never heard of that. At least not when looking at anatomy diagrams. Still I guess it makes a bit of sense.
________________
A bit annoyed that these didn't pop up on my notifications. Still, thanks for the replies ^_^, and sorry it took awhile for me to get to these.
6357722 She's so adorable, sings amazingly and is the sister of a famous designer... and her mark is for setting shit on fire 8D
HAHAHA! XD
6357722
True enough, but she held back the information that Rarity's life was in danger. And if she held that back, what other nefarious marefriend stealing plans could she be hiding?
6357823
6358378 That sounds lovely
hehehe eue
6358525
Up until she summons the Tentacle Rape Monster from Tartarus. Hopefully the Nightmare won't give a Trollestia Molestia combo. I don't think the wombs of Equestria could stand that level of horror.
6358543 I bet there's a few who wouldn't mind that Tentacle monster in Equestria *eyeballs a few of them*
huehuehue eue
6358564
*Cringes* Yeah, you always get a few oddballs out there with weird kinks for monsters of apocalyptic proportions. I bet there are quite a few out there in Equestria who thinks Tirek was teh hotness *shudders*, or was enamored by the Smooze.
6358605 Dat Smooze had it going on son, sheeebus, did you see the blob on that thing?
Was so blobby, how could anypony not think he was teh shite?
space.
________________
Cap.
___________
I am eager to see the next chapter. This fic is utterly amazing, and we're finally getting to the Twiliestia Pie bit.
I'll admit a bit of disappointment with Flutters. But that's on a personal bit, I just hope it doesn't bite her in the plot too badly. All in all, great arc. Wonderful story, and I hope there are many, many, many more chapters a head. It's wonderfully written, the second ship fic I've ever read, and the first fic to get me to like Rarity (at least fanon Rarity) as a character. You make an amazing Pinkie Pie that is the best one out there so far. Although Moguera's Savage Skies Series comes pretty darn close. And the over all character interactions are superb.
It'll be a very sad day when the fic ends. And even though this is my third time reading this. I can easily see myself re-reading this fic many, many more times in the future. If not just for nostalgia, then for the pure enjoyment of the re-visiting a highly enjoyable work.
6358532 GreatEater - Flowers for Algernon is a classic sci-fi short story written in 1958 about a man whose very low IQ is radically boosted by science. Sadly, the effect is short lived and the man watches helplessly as his new dreams and potentials slip away. Fortunately, Steel Resolve assures that our favorite fashionista's situation isn't anywhere near as dark.
6359419 Correct, it's a bit like the talent potion from Double Rainboom.
So, they're pumping the breaks on that. That's good. Rushing these things is a sign of an unhealthy relationship.
I am constantly astounded by how broken Twilight and Pinkie are. The two most broken ponies in the crazy AU of this story, and they had to fall in love with each other.
Well, on to the next one. Onward!
I think this is at the core of some of the issues this story has - your characters are way too prone to self-hate. It's not just Twlight, either, but several others of the main characters as well and both of the princesses, all to varying degrees. It's portrayed in this story to an extent that I think might actually be poisonous. I've known people who had great difficulty with self-acceptance and I could see how unhappy they were as a result of not liking themselves very much, and so I have made a conscious effort to cultivate a better attitude for myself, but I know many people struggle with this.
We don't see much of these themes in the show itself. Ponies are rarely down on themselves, usually only as a result of having made a legitimate mistake which they regret, and never exceeding the scope of a single episode. It tends to be played both straight and for laughs, not for drama. I understand this fanfic is intended for a more mature audience than the show, but even correcting for that, I reject the idea that this lack of self-worth is a major part of the psychological makeup of so many central characters. Twilight is very critical of herself and her mistakes, perceived and real, and that much is portrayed accurately. But her thinking something like that is excessive. I don't mind characters being hesitant and shy to prolong the development of a romance, but this... this is not good, or healthy.
The scene with Luna, Fleur and Fancy Pants is really good. A discussion of changelings and shapechanging, rulership, and Luna finally having some positive interactions with the populace. This is good stuff.
The little domestic scene with Fluttershy and Rarity was... nice.
A much needed change of pace :)
The final scene with Twilight and Pinkie was thoughtful and sweet. This is more like it!
More of this kind of thing, please!
7846105
Hm, I think it's the particular style of this particular Author. You should read his other works - the theme seems to reverberate throughout, more or less...
I get what you mean, but this is fine. It's a different take at the whole thing, more in-line with how actual people can sometimes think of themselves (and hoboy hello soulmate Twilight "This is how I look when I hate myself" Sparkle...). I appreciate you not agreeing with how the characters are portrayed - would you consider appreciating the story for what it is?
And to be perfectly honest... while this is escapism - stories like this one work for me, personally, because they give me some (illusive, but temporarily heartwarming) hope that even people like me might somehow stumble into the right answer, in the end, and somehow not end up losing everything forever.
And yeah, wearing masks becomes natural, eventually - to the point that you only really notice you're doing it when one cracks on you.
[edit]
That face... Heh, "a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes" indeed.
Sorry for the long post but I didn't want to write a review after every chapter. I didn't want another situation where I bring up a concern just to have it addressed the very next chapter.
That being said, some of my concerns for this story has been sorted out but others still remain. Celestia's dissent into mental illness was a nice touch to parallel Luna's dissent into Nightmare Moon. Not to mention Luna's new role as the "leading princess", essentially putting the two princesses in each other's hooves. A nice side story for what started off as a simple romance. So I can understand why Celestia was OOC and "un-princesslike" but that doesn't quite explain why the main 6 are so rude to the princesses. Twilight wants to set Luna on fire? Pinkie punches Celestia? Applajack insults and yells at Celestia?
Fluttershy yelling at Luna does work in the context of the story but that makes Fluttershy's character a bit too inconsistent. The shy pony that suddenly explodes in anger? And can occasionally be a freak in bed? And is also a soldier trained by the harshest drill sergeant in Equestria? This just makes Fluttershy too much of a wildcard. I would have preferred Fluttershy to be as demure as in the show. She should be the quiet one who rarely talks and expresses herself but when she does, ponies listen. She should never have to yell to get her point across, a monologue from Fluttershy should be impactful regardless of volume. As she is, it kind of begs the question why is Fluttershy shy in the first place? She might have been sick when she was young but afterwards she literally set records at boot camp. She seems to have a laundry list of capabilities so she may be kind but little reason to be shy. It might have been interesting if Fluttershy's past comes up suddenly like when Rarity tried to sneak up on Fluttershy and Fluttershy's training kicks in and she attacks Rarity out of instinct. Then there can be an arc about Rarity helping Fluttershy work through childhood traumas. After all, who better to be kind to the element of kindness than her own lover.
But the main reason for this comment is the whole thing with Twilight, Pinkie, and Celestia. The first part of this chapter was really hard to read. I really didn't like how Twilight was trying to psychoanalyze her "dream". First off, a learned pony like Twilight would know that that's not how dreams work. Secondly, knowing that you're in a dream is a key factor of lucid dreaming. I don't know, it just came off as immature and silly. Twilight is so wrapped up in self-hatred and rejection that she literally can't comprehend that her dreams are coming true in front of her face? All because of a single rejection as a foal? It would have made more sense if Twilight had a long list of rejections and bad relationships during her time in Canterlot and Celestia was her first. That would even explain Twilight's whole "I don't really do friends" attitude that was even in the first episode of the show and works with this version of Twilight.
I think that my problem with this particular love triangle is that they are too emotionally male. Please excuse the gender stereotypes but isn't talking about feelings a dominantly feminine trait? You're telling me that there are three females who are interested in each other but not a single one are open with their feelings? Bottling up feelings and being ignorant of hints is definitely more of a guy thing. It's weird that Celestia and Pinkie know that they each have feelings for Twilight but instead of figuring out a menage a trois, they are literally fighting over each other for the other to take them so "they can be happy". What exacerbates this situation is the stark contrast to the Rarity, Fluttershy, and Luna "failed" love triangle. Their triangle makes sense and is so much jucier than Twilight's. Luna's off-hand lust turning into real passion. Fluttershy's refusal to share her hard-earned prize. Rarity's conflict between her own interest in Luna and her loyalty to Fluttershy. I don't like the focus on Twilight's part of the story when pretty much any other part (including Spike's) seems to be a lot more interesting and well though out. I see that others have had similar concerns about this story so I won't make this rant even longer than it is.
Rest assured that I will be finishing this story with great interest regardless of any of my issues with it. Please don't take the criticisms personally. Critiques are how I enjoy things and the fact that a MLP fanfic got me writing essays about it should be taken as high praise.