There can be no greater horror than finding out too much about your mother’s sex life. Why oh why had she asked? She knew this was going to terrify her! Still, when the time comes for Fluttershy and I to be intimate, I shall be ready! My head is full of disturbing but useful information. And all it cost me was my peace of mind and sanity. A bargain! 

Still, the ordeal left her with a newfound respect for her mother. She had of course heard that the older mare had been a cheerleader; that was how her parents had met after all, on the hoofball field. She still wondered at times if her poor father hadn’t taken one too many blows to the head during his hoofball days. Apparently that’s where she had met the pegasus colt as well. Rarity’s heart sang at the descriptions of the ways in which her father had tried to woo her. But she was still committed to her first coltfriend at the time. The things her mother had described doing with her pegasus beau... and in flight no less. I wonder if Twilight would teach me the cloudwalking spell, that might be interesting. Making love on a cloud... Apparently it all came down to the school dance, when her coltfriend left her for another mare. And there was her father, waiting in the wings, wanting only her love and willing to wait forever for her to finally notice him... Oh my, quite romantic. 

She sat patiently waiting for her fillyfriend and father to return. The clock ticked at a maddeningly slow pace. She watched her mother craft a fine casserole as it floated in midair, nodding and humming along to a song only she heard. She realized with some amazement that she recognized the tune, and wondered what the lyrics were in her mother’s version. And the infernal ticking continued, each second another blow to her sanity. “Rargh! What’s taking them so long?”

Her mother chuckled while assembling the various ingredients in the pan. “Have patience, Rarey, your father is not cruel stallion. He’s not going to make your fillyfriend cry. I’m sure he’s just chatting with her. You know, trying to get to know her, to see what you love about her.”

Rarity held a foreleg up to her brow in a gesture very familiar to any who had seen her dramatics.  “Oh, but it’s not fair, Mother, he’s supposed to be talking to me! I fretted over this moment! It’s important to me! I want his approval! It was hard enough just getting him to acknowledge there was something to approve!”

Her mother nodded patiently as she set the oven to bake the dish, then started to slice mixed fruit into a bowl for dessert. “Let’s try to occupy that mind of yours for a while, shall we? Tell me a bit about the first filly. What happened with her? You must have cared for her if you brought her home...”

Rarity looked pensive, Snow had been weighing heavily on her mind during this entire visit. Not fair at all to Fluttershy. It felt like such strong and healthy love at the time, and yet it failed over something so simple as my father not showing his approval of us. “I did... at the time. It was very important to her, you see, that you both give us your consent. Truth be told I felt pressured into it. We’d only been dating a matter of weeks at the time, we’d yet to do more than hold hooves really. I was rather embarrassed after Father just seemed to... misunderstand everything I tried to tell him. But, thinking back, I was rather relieved. Isn’t that horrible? I mean I cared quite deeply for Snow... but some little niggling part of me just knew... she wasn’t the one.”

“Oh? Was that why you didn’t fight for her the way you did with Fluttershy?”

“Oh my, no, I would have fought just as — no, actually I think you are right... Poor Snow Drop, I could have stood my ground and made him understand, even then, if I had loved her as dearly as I thought I did.” She sighed sadly. “I should have just told her I wasn’t comfortable pushing things along so fast. She deserved better from me. Still, she found her special somepony eventually, so perhaps things worked out as they were meant to. I really should have known my own heart better. Even then I found such comfort going to Fluttershy to cry my eyes out after it had ended. How was I so blind as to have missed this for so long? I was always going to Fluttershy... except for the one time it would have meant the most! How was I such a fool as not to have told her how I felt?”

“Don’t beat yourself up over it too much, Rarey,” the older mare said, putting a comforting hoof on her daughter’s shoulder. “You got it figured out eventually. If it makes you feel better it took me a while to realize the difference between infatuation and love too. Well, okay, between lust and love, if we’re being totally frank.” Her mother blushed. Thank you Mother, something else I shall have to repress. Aloe will be so pleased, it’s going to take hours to get these knots out of my back. 

Rarity’s dad let out a huge guffaw. “Really? You stared down a dragon? With the fire and the claws and the rar?! Wow, Kiddo, that’s something.” That one certainly didn’t make the papers. “Not saying I doubt you or anything, but that’s impressive, I mean you just seem so... meek.”

“Oh I am, but nopony hurts my friends.” She puffed up her chest proudly, then shrank back as she apparently realized she probably sounded overconfident. “What I mean is, I am pretty weak and helpless by myself. My friends make me feel stronger.”

“I’m kind of relieved actually; a father likes to know his daughter has someone who can back her up when she gets into a bad situation. Social or... well, having to face down a dragon I guess. I’m proud to know she’s fallen in love with a filly who can draw on so much strength when she needs it.”

“Um... thank you.”

The two chatted for a while, just sharing little bits of their lives, getting to know one another. He found himself more and more impressed with her with every word. She was kind, humble, loving, and so determined to make his daughter happy. I guess the equipment is not so important, it’s the heart that matters most. He hugged her fondly.  “Thank you, Kiddo, I've never seen my little girl looking so happy. Do you have any idea how often she cried on our shoulders after that Blueblood prick broke her dreams? I could see it in her eyes when you walked in with her, she’s found her special somepony at last."

After some time Fluttershy grew a little silent, seeming to want to ask something but not quite sure how to do so. "Um... Mr. Rarity's Dad?"

He laughed a bit. So formal all the time! I gave you a nickname Kiddo, it’s okay to relax a bit. "Just call me Dad, Kiddo.”

She blushed hard, but forced herself on regardless. "Oh, okay, um, Dad. Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, Kiddo, what's up?"

“Well, you and Rarity's mom, you're both unicorns..."

"Yeah, horns and everything."

"Right... well I was wondering...” She rubbed her hooves together nervously. “I've never been with a unicorn... or, um, anypony really. I know about pegasi, a little... but what would make Rarity happy?"

"Just keep being yourself Kiddo, you seem to be doing all right."

"No... What would make her happy... that way."

"Oh... um...“ He looked around to make sure nopony was nearby to overhear. He saw nopony, but even so, his voice dropped to a whisper.

“You’re gonna have to figure things out as you go of course. I can’t claim to know what it's like for two mares to be together...” He stopped, not quite sure he was comfortable with this. Who else does she have to ask? Help the poor kid out. “Okay, Kiddo, let me tell you a little bit about horns..."

Twenty minutes later both of them were blushing hard and giggling madly. Well, I just told my future daughter-in-law how to seduce my daughter... yeah, that's not weird at all. “Now remember, I never told you anything. If she asks, take that secret to the grave.”

She nodded happily and hugged him again. Yeah, I could get used to these. “We should really head inside, Kiddo. Dinner will be about ready, and I expect Rarity will be fretting by now.”

Fluttershy scuffed a hoof on the patio. “Okay... but... oh, this is awful...”

“What’s up?” He was genuinely curious now.

“Um... I once helped sew her a dress, and she played a mean trick on us... I always wanted to get her back for that... but we shouldn’t, it would hurt her feelings...”

“What did she do?”

A few moments later he was grinning. “Okay, but we gotta play it straight, and you should probably be ready to soothe her ruffled feathers. Uh, no pun intended, Kiddo.”

As Rarity was just about to go mad for roughly the third time, her father and her love finally walked in from the patio. Her first glance was of course to Fluttershy. She did not seem happy. Oh no... Then she shifted her increasingly angry gaze to her father, who looked grim. Rarity proceeded to ask the most difficult question she had ever had to ask in her life. “H-how did it go?”

Father gave her a gruff look, but there was something more there, some tiny twinkle in his eyes. “Rarity, I’m sorry, hon, I really am, but I don’t like her.”

And the bottom fell out of her world. “Y-you don’t? You don’t?” She put fire in her voice, real anger made her advance on him like an enraged bull. “How could you not like her?! Explain yourself this instant! She is the sweetest, most wonderful mare I have ever met! How could you not adore her? You will tell me this instant or... I don’t know what I shall do but it will not be pleasant!” She backed him into a corner, her voice getting more and more shrill. “Tell me!”

“Young lady, control yourself!” He was grinning now, although his smile was tinged with just a bit of intimidation. Fluttershy had a very worried look, but let him continue with the charade. She seemed ready to jump in at any moment however. “I don’t like her... I love her! You better take care of her, because if you make her cry I might just disown you and adopt her.”

“You... do... Oh, that’s nice.” Rarity smiled in relief. Then she fainted dead away.

“Rarity!” She heard Fluttershy’s voice as she fell. Be right with you, darling, I— 

Rarity awoke sputtering as she felt water splash over her face. A very concerned yellow visage was looking back at her. She tried to remember what yellow was, and what it might mean to her now. “Rarity? Are you okay?”

Rarity... that’s me, isn’t it? I should probably respond. “Buh.” Ah yes, well done. She shook her head to try to clear it.

“Oh Rarity, I’m sorry! We didn’t mean to upset you so much. Oh, Dad, I told you this was too mean. Please be okay!” She found the yellow thing hugging her. She reached out absently and stroked the pink mane with a hoof. She spent a few more moments just gathering her faculties. Did she just call my father Dad? I must have misheard. 

“Shhhh, I’m alright, darling. I am sorry if I overreacted. This is just very important to me and I could feel it all crashing down around me for a moment. I am glad you two like one another.” Rarity stood carefully, feeling a few scrapes and bruises from her collapse as she did so. This would have to happen without a handy couch nearby, wouldn’t it? She disentangled herself from Fluttershy, giving her an apologetic look as she did so, then faced her father.

“Rarity... I’m so sorry.” He gulped nervously, clearly prepared for another verbal tirade. He needn’t have worried. She ran to him and hugged him tightly, squealing like a filly.

“Thank you, Daddy!” Then she blanched; she hadn’t called him that in years. “I-I suppose after that stunt I pulled earlier this was the least retribution I could expect. I won’t hold it against you.”

He stroked her hair lovingly. “Well, that was Kiddo’s idea, she said you pulled a trick like that on her once and I agreed to help get you back for it a little. Really, Rarey, messing with your friends like that! But that’s not what I’m sorry for... I should have told you I was uncomfortable when you showed up with that pretty filly. I could have taken you aside, done anything other than what I did. Will you forgive your old dad for not being supportive when his daughter needed him?”

Rarity was touched, she truly was. That’s all it was, then? Oh what fools we both were. “Yes, yes you should have. But then I likely should have broached the subject with you before just showing up with Snow like that. She was just so excited and insistent that she meet you two...

“It’s quite all right Father. Truthfully, Mother and I were talking about that very thing just now. Thinking back, I felt things were moving a little fast and was somewhat relieved, although it hurt at the time. As for Snow... well you might apologize to her at some point. I could arrange a dinner date for everypony to clear the air. I suspect she might appreciate that much. Speaking of dinner, shall we eat? I find myself famished.”

He nodded, satisfied she had accepted his apology. “I’m glad for you, Rarey, I really am. You found a good one. And... tell your ex I’m sorry, and I’d be glad to say that in her company sometime. I owe her an explanation, too.”

Her mother had blissfully ignored the entire conversation, and as they took their places at the table she pulled the perfectly-cooked casserole out of the oven. Drama, fainting and overall theatrics, yet she still managed to time it all just right. We may not share the same sense of taste, but in her own niche she is fabulous. 

After Sweetie Belle was called down from her room and joined them in the kitchen, everypony began to eat. It was a quiet, pleasant meal, very much helping Rarity to feel a sense of rebonding with her father that she had, quite frankly, needed. She’d been just a bit resentful of him since the incident with Snow and it felt wonderful to forgive him in her heart.

“Psst.”

Rarity turned to the sound of the noise. Her sister was leaning close to her. “Yes, dear?”

“Is Fluttershy going to be my sister-in-law now?”

Rarity panicked just a bit, but actually... the thought appealed. “I’m not certain quite yet. You’ll have to give me time to ask her first.”

Sweetie playfully poked her in the ribs. “I knew it! You’re in loooove with her!”

“Yes, but I thought we agreed not to discuss the matter. Still, if that’s off the table, care to discuss your special somepony?”

Sweetie looked confused. “Somepony? Why do I have to pick just one?”

Rarity was about to respond to that when her father raised his voice. “Rarey, do you have plans for this afternoon?”

Rarity considered; there was the order of course, but that was going well. “Nothing pressing, Father.”

“Well, your mother and I had hoped you’d join us for a round of minigolf? You used to love to play when you were a filly.”

Yes... when I was a filly. “Oh, sadly I seem to have forgotten—”

“I’d love to.”

Rarity turned to Fluttershy in surprise, trying to hide her annoyance. “Fluttershy? You play?”

“Oh my, yes, it’s very relaxing. I haven’t played in a while though.”

Sweetie Belle piped up playfully. “Are you the world champ of that too?”

“Oh no, just regional. I had to retire, apparently the other players found me distracting.”

And now we’re all wearing the horrible golf pants. Lovely. Still I suppose it is the accepted fashion of the sport, so for being horrible they are... fashionable here? No... they are still horrible. She huffed a huge sigh. At least everypony else seemed happy. Get into the spirit of it. Yes, it's a tacky game, but it has its own charm. She carefully lined up her shot on the first hole. She’d never managed to do better than a birdie on this one, but maybe if she tried chipping it off the corner just so... “WahaHAha!” It’s going straight for the hole, a hole in... “It stopped... “ Go in the hole, you stubborn ball! Oh, of all the things that could happen... this is the worst possible— “Fluttershy, what are you doing, darling?”

Fluttershy eyed the layout carefully, her tongue stuck out in a cute expression as she thought about her shot. She held out a wing just slightly, feeling for air currents. Then she did something very familiar to Rarity; she stared. Rarity was about to ask what she was up to when the pegasus nodded, gripping the club carefully in her wings. She wiggled her flank a bit. Yes... I see, a distraction. I suppose that does qualify. Then she struck the ball in a very precise motion, sending it racing off at precise angles to finally line straight up with the hole. Her ball struck Rarity’s, tapping it in, then seemed to spin backwards for a moment, coming to rest just shy of falling in the hole.

Rarity had finally torn her gaze away from the wiggling flank long enough to notice her birdie had just turned into an ace, at the expense of Fluttershy getting one. “Darling, that was marvelous! But how did you make the ball do that?”

Fluttershy took a deep breath. “Well, I had to account for wind direction and velocity, then adjust the angle so I could line up the shot. It had to hit yours at just the right angle and speed to knock it in, but also have enough backspin to stop mine from going in afterward.”

“I... see, but if you can exercise that much control over the ball why not knock both in?”

“Oh... I like birdies.”

Father interjected, having recovered from witnessing that display of sheer skill. “Technically if you’d gotten the hole in one it would be called an eagle on this hole...”

“Yes... but eagles are too loud, I like birdies better.” Fluttershy looked panicked, realizing what she’d just said. “Oh, please don’t tell Mr. Eagle I said that, he’d be so sad.”

“I believe your secret is safe, my dear...” Rarity shook her head in wonderment.

The rest of the holes went much the same. Rarity’s shots were consistently turned into aces for the first few holes. She eventually asked Fluttershy to stop doing that, as it took any real challenge out of the game. While she did enjoy seeing her balls get chipped in with such precision, the novelty quickly wore off. The pegasus seemed content to force her ball to come just short of a hole in one every time. It was actually growing quite maddening. How can she be happy being second best? She looked at Fluttershy appraisingly, and realized she was not just content, she was genuinely happy. Rarity could not help but smile.

Finally they arrived at the last hole. This one had always given her no end of trouble. It was a horrific looking parody of life. It’s colors garish to behold. The teeth of the thing were constantly gnashing down on the path to the best shot. The worst was that ridiculous red nose. That wretched clown. I will beat you this time, you evil thing! She lined up her shot carefully; going through the mouth was a guaranteed hole in one but the timing was nearly impossible. She shifted her stance to aim for a tunnel off to the side where she could at least get under par. A feather tickled her nose, and she sneezed slightly. She looked back in annoyance and found Fluttershy studying her stance.

“Um... you should aim for the mouth,” was whispered very softly in her ear, the warm breath tingling every nerve.

“I can’t make that shot, the teeth close every time.”

“Trust me, aim for the mouth.” She felt hooves on her flank adjusting her stance and shivered as Fluttershy brushed her cutie mark for a moment. Fluttershy melded her body around her. She could feel every breath the pegasus took, every heartbeat in her chest. “Swing gently when I tell you.” The moment stretched on for an eternity for Rarity, who was finding it difficult to remain standing. “Now.”

Rarity gently struck the ball towards the obstacle.  She watched in fear as the teeth closed... and opened for the brief millisecond needed for her ball to pass through unmolested. She heard a satisfying plunk from the other side of the clown as her ball rolled neatly into the hole.

At first she just stared, unable to believe what had just happened. Then she dropped her club, grinning like a maniac. “Eeeeee! I did it! I did it! I finally did it!”  

She turned to Fluttershy, who was rearing back and taking a deep breath. “Ya—” Her cheer was cut short by Rarity pouncing into her forelegs and kissing her hard.

A polite cough came from behind them. Father and Mother were each blocking one of Sweetie’s eyes while Sweetie tried desperately to get their hooves off so she could see. Rarity immediately extracted herself from Fluttershy’s embrace, blushing furiously. “Sorry.”

The game finished with Rarity solidly in the lead and Fluttershy trailing by one stroke. The fashionista laughed at the idea of keeping score after being shown that Fluttershy could and did control everything that little white spheroid was capable of. Still, her family had enjoyed watching Fluttershy carefully make every hole seem like foal’s play.

The goodbyes had been heartrending. It felt so very good to embrace her dadd— err, father without feeling distant from him. Rarity and Fluttershy walked back to the Boutique together, feeling all the more close for having weathered a difficult social situation together. Rarity mused as they walked, going over a checklist in her mind. They were really more Twilight’s forte but she found them useful on occasion.

Let’s see: find love, check. Confess love... well, check, although it took some gentle prodding from Fluttershy. Take her to meet the parents, check. But I feel I missed a crucial step along the way... “Dating!” Fluttershy looked at her, startled. She had after all only uttered that one word out of the blue.

“Oh I am sorry, my dear... it just occured to me we skipped a step in all this. Do you have plans this evening? I should like to wine you and dine you a bit.”