Stories in Stone, Luna's Royal Guard.

by TDR

Path of Sand, Part 1

Stories in Stone
Luna's Royal Guard
By TDR

Path of Sand
Part 1

Twilight looked at Rainbow Dash as she reads over the book. The cyan pegasus muttered something to herself about how awesome Starfall had been to fight that griffon even when hurt that bad. Twilight bit her lip, wanting to ask her friend about her parents. She could not think of a way to approach the situation delicately, so she opted for the Bleu approach.

“Hey, Rainbow?”

“Hmm, what’s up?”

“Have you ever thought about your parents?”

“Nope.”

“Errr what? Why?”

“If they were willing to give up somepony as awesome as me, then I don't see a reason to care about giving them up.”

“You've never even thought about it?”

“Nope... What’s with this question, anyway?”

“Err, nothing; I just heard you had been raised in the Cloudsdale orphanage and something in the latest chapter kinda brought it to my attention.”

“Oh. Well, nah, I never really thought about them. Like I said, they didn't care enough about me. Why should I care about them?”

“I suppose…”

“Look, Twilight, are you gonna let me read this or should I go back to my practice?”

“No, No, that was it. Sorry.”

“Right; I'm here so you can study, so get studying.”

Twilight turned, activating the spell, and heard Rainbow mutter under her breath as she slipped into the magical plane.

“Geez, nosy today; least she didn't ask about me and AJ.”

Twilight sighed, feeling bad for making her friend feel bad, but she was awash with emotions with everything she had learned. She had not even told Dash that she was a descendant of Starfall yet. She didn't want that to cloud her friend’s judgment when the time came to make her choice.

She looked at the windows and swallowed hard. Time for the usual starter of Jer'rahd.

=================================================

(Present Day)

Wind rushed over the trio as Bleu flew through the sky, skimming the tops of clouds. Luna sat on the dragon’s back, quite calmly watching the clouds rush below them. Jer'rahd, however, had lost all meaning of the word calm the moment the sea had come into sight, and he was currently curled up on Bleu's back between her wings with a death grip on one of her spines. It could not be comfortable for him and Bleu had already bitched about it. Luna ignored them both, using small shield to block the wind from herself as she looked over the spells in the Gray Grimoire a last time. Aqua was not going to go down easily and she would need Jer'rahd's beast to deal with her… provided he could cease panicking enough to be of any sort of use at all.

Looking back at the fully-armored and trembling unicorn, she was starting to worry if that was going to be possible at all. Bleu had flown up above the clouds, hiding the sea from view, but the unicorn was still panicked as if it was right before him.

They had been over the ocean for about an hour now and were currently closing in on the last known location of the floating island that marked the entrance to Neighlantis. Provided Aqua had not pulled the island back under the waves, it would be a good place to start the hunt.

=================================

(Four days ago.)

This was the longest trip he had ever been on. Rhede was still depressed and had hoped for some sort of conversation to speed the week’s travel to the zebra lands. No such luck. Velkorn was still not speaking with him any more than necessary and most of the guards were too nervous around him to be chatty.

This was not going to be a good trip.

=====================================

(Four days ago.)

This was going to be a great trip. Starfall was doing all she could not to skip and jump around as she made sure her troops were ready. This attack was going to be a clear rebuttal to the Griffon nation to show what happened when they messed with the Lunar Republic. The Princess had not forgotten the group that had met the caravan of wounded leaving the dragon lands.

Rhede and the princess’s informants had traced that group and most of the dragons’ mercenaries back to a trio of Griffon Aries on the far side of the Great Hooper Sea to the northeast.

There was a nagging voice in the back of the pegasus's mind that told her nothing she did would bring back her parents, sister, or Loc. But that nagging voice was much quieter than the ones screaming for revenge.

===================================

(One week before departure)

“Starfall, hold up.”

The pegasus growled, having just come back from visiting her daughter. Normally, she would be in a good mood from this, but her daughter had gotten into a fight with some other young ponies about Starfall's involvement in the Lunar Republic. Cloud Dancer had not taken well to having her mother called a traitor to Equestria and had laid out three of them before being jumped by the rest of the group.
Starfall was beyond pissed that her daughter had gotten hurt, though Maw had managed to talk her out of going around to have a rather violent word or two with the young ponies’ parents. Still, it had put a damper on the visit and the angry mood had persisted. It had not helped matters that most of the Pelts and others in Ponyville had somehow heard about her upcoming mission and had been trying to talk her out of it. They clearly thought there was enough death.

“What is it, General? I have a mission to plan. I don't need any more mindless banter.”

“Knock it off; pointless rage is my thing.”

She glared back at him, barely noticing the box he carried along with him.

“I don't need someone else to bitch to me about my mission, trying to make me feel bad about killing griffons.”

“Why the buck would I say something like that? Do you actually know me, Starfall? My father was killed in a border skirmish with griffons in the same area you are being sent to. Personally, I say send them all to the fires of Tartarus. I was just going to tell you to be careful out there. This is a solo thing for you. While you have the troops to watch your back, none of them are us, so don't get crazy. This is only a raid, get in and do enough damage that they get the message, not to buck with us and get out. However, the Princess wants me to inform you of a secondary objective as well.”

Starfall exhaled deeply, trying to calm herself.

“And here I thought you wanted to fight again.”

“I still think you are a little too focused on killing griffons above anything else, but for now, that works.”

“I am no less determined to kill them all than you were against the dragons.”

“I get that, but don't let the rage overwhelm you too much. That tends not to work out that well for me; I doubt you would fare any differently. Anyway, the Princess wants you to make contact with the Harpies. See if you can hire some mercenaries or recruit a few for the raid. Rhede says your target is one of the most contested areas between the two races. If you manage to get enough support, I say take out the whole lot of them, but only if you can do it with minimum loss on our side. We do not have the numbers to lose many of our troops.”

“Alright, I can do that. A few extra heads helping to rid the world of those liars would be good.”

“Liars?”

“Griffons claim to be the most honorable of all the races. Most of them live by a code that governs everything from their gods all the way down to the shit shovelers. The code covers everything in peace and war. One of the predominant rules of their code of war is that the innocent are not to be harmed. As my parents’ and sister's graves can attest, that is a rather lax code.”

“That was one griffon. And she is being punished.”

“One griffon under orders from her father to terrorize the enemies of their nation as much as she could. She was given free rein to do as she wished by the gods of the griffons. What sort of 'honorable' race allows terrorist acts to go on that violate their own code? Yet ponies got called on it for wiping out the dragons and that is the excuse they are using for why they hate us. Because we attacked civilians.”

“Rather well-versed in griffon politics, I see.”

“Like Stonehoof said in basic. Knowing your enemy is knowing how to defeat them.”

“Not sure he actually said that, but that brings up something. Stonehoof and Meteor Shower came by two days ago while you were still in Ponyville.”

“Really? I am sorry that I missed seeing General Shower again, though not sorry I missed her husband. They didn't come to chide our choices in life, did they?”

“No; far from it. They both wished they could have been there. Granted, it took me time to figure out that every time Stonehoof spoke I didn't have to jump into action on something. I outrank him by far and he still makes me uneasy. However, they did come bearing gifts.”

“Gifts?”

“Stonehoof just passed his last class and retired from the Guard, and well, we know why General Shower retired.”

“Yeah, not the best way to go out, though.”

“She's alive; that's more than many can say. Anyway, she brought these by, said she couldn't use them anymore without her wings. Figured you might be able to. She said she had them made after the attack on the Discord castles, but never had a chance to use them.”

He floated the box over, setting it before her on the ground. She looked down at it curiously, flipping open the catch and lifting the box's lid. The interior was lined with padded red silk with a swath of the material draped over the objects within. Starfall pushed the lid aside, pulling the silk off as well, a small smile forming on her face.

A pair of slightly curved short blades rested in the box. Starfall lifted one up with a wing, letting it catch the light of the hall and smiling wider at the heft of the weapon. The handles were wrapped in orange silk, General Shower’s favorite color. The weapons were only bladed on one side and the other side had an odd groove in it that ran the length of the dull side that ended half way up the blade in a hollow. Two fixed loops were spaced along the blade below the hollow between it and the grip.

“This is very light... what's the groove for?”

“She called it a wing blade. From what she said, your front feather can slide into the groove inside the rings and it will hold it to your wing. I suppose it can give you bladed wings if you figure out how to use it properly.”

“Pity I don't have the time to train with them like that now, but they should work well enough as standard swords. Jer'rahd... the metal in this, is it…?”

“Star metal, yes. Keep in mind I started suggesting that material’s use when we found the dragons had a bunch of it in the attack. The full capabilities of it are little more than dulling magic, or outright blocking it. This is what allows it to be able to kill gods so easily. That and most of the gods think they are invincible and act stupid because of it.”

“I am not sure if I can accept this from General Shower.”

“You were not given a choice. Granted, I was not given a choice to accept my gift, either. I can argue with General Shower all week, but not Stonehoof. That pony still scares the crap out of me.”

“Yeah, likewise; guess you can never get over the terror your drill instructor puts into you. What did he give you, anyway?”

Jer'rahd turned back and pulls something out of his saddlebag. Starfall froze, looking at it as if it was a live wind serpent, as he spun it with his magic.

“By Luna's sparkling tail, is that…?

“Yeah... Stonehoof's drill instructor hat.”

“HE GAVE THAT TO YOU?!”

“Claimed it was a lesson in humility.”

“How the heck can an accomplishment like that be a lesson in humility? He said you were the first pony since he started training that even nicked that thing.”

Jer'rahd turned the hat, showing the slight gash in the hat that he had made in order to keep his grandfather's sword. He then turned the hat, showing a much deeper slice that ran from the brim to the hat’s center, actually cutting into the center portion of the hat.

“The lesson is that no matter how good you are, sooner or later there will be someone better.”

======================================

(One week before departure)

[“Velkorn, do you have a moment?”]

The zebra looked up from packing her medical bags to the Princess of the Night standing at her open door.

[“I have time yet, Princess. What is it you need?”]

[“I have been curious about that potion you made when we were in the dragon lands, the one that kept you and the others awake for several days at a time and seemed to boost your energy.”]

[“That is a dangerous brew, Princess. I am still fighting off the urge to make more of it for myself.”]

Luna glanced around the room and the host of books that Velkorn had, including two very large books Rhede had brought her from the dragons library.

[“I expected as much. I would like to know what exactly it requires; we may need it again at some point. I believe it may be a good idea for at least two ponies to know how to make it and the antidote, much like how the device can recover the Elements if something happens to one of us if something were to happen to you, it would be good to have that information handy rather than need to translate it as you have.”]

[“I understand. I have notes translating what the book says, though I expect you may be able to read old Poneese yourself. If you return before I do, the book for the cure as well as symptoms is the green bound one on the second shelf. There are quite a few useful things in there, as well as many I already knew. I will see if I can make some sort of universal antidote to it when I return; the antidote to it now is full of hard-to-find herbs, which is counterproductive considering how common the plants are to make the energy mix itself.”]

[“I do not need it now, but it is something I will look into if we return. I would like to set up a safety net in case I lose anyone.”]

[“You have been rather morbid as of late, Princess. You should not be so down and detrimental to yourself.”]

[“It is difficult not to do that when there is much hanging over my head with the creation of this new government as well as the possiblity of attacks. And if I am not mistaken, there are still Jer’rahd and Rhede’s prophecies from when they were tested by the Elements yet to come to pass.”]

[“Jer'rahd refuses to tell anyone what happened in his. Rhede is much the same with his, remaining silent. Bleu's has come to pass, as has Starfall's. Mine has only become half true.”]

[“Half true?”]

[“The bodies were there, and my wound is deep, but Rhede has not killed me just yet.”]

=======================================================

(Three days ago)

“Report.”

“The griffons knew we were coming; they evidently saw the ground forces advance and have reinforced themselves in the main aerie we marked as a target. They have also called for backup from some of the other aeries close by, sir.”

Starfall glanced up at the stallion. Lion Heart looked damn good in the Shadowbolts’ uniform. It was a pity he was the only one of the half-dragons who had been able to keep up with her. They were tougher than regular ponies and stronger as well, but also slower in the air. Even the weakest pegasus flier could spin circles around an average half-dragon in the air. There were exceptions, of course; Lion Heart would not have been accepted into the Shadowbolts if he was not one.

She turned, looking down at the cloud she stood on, considering a few moments before sighing.
“Perfect; just what I needed... How many aeries are supporting this one?”

“From what we have been able to tell, three of them. After the destruction of Cindervale, they are not willing to take any chances with the Lunar Republic forces, sir.”

“Good; they are not as stupid as I thought, just predictable.”

“I gather you have a plan, sir?”

“About two dozen. I made the mistake of having a drink or two with General Kaisur before we left. He doesn't shut up when you ask for strategy suggestions. Problem is, while he plans for everything, he only plans for how he would deal with everything. He doesn't think like a flier.”

Starfall looked out over the ground forces before her. At least sixty percent of the forces sent with her were earth ponies and unicorns, as well as the half-dragon equivalents, though those were very rare. Honestly, she could not even remember having seen unicorn or earth pony half-dragons before this. But there were some down there wearing the armor of the Lunar Republic.

Lion Heart said they had others show up after they had settled on the island, including quite a few other small groups that had the same idea as his, but had not been lucky enough to find purpose before losing many of their number to apathy. This allowed them to expand to cover nearly the entire island. The half-dragons still seemed to need something to keep them busy or they would drop into a depression. Thankfully, the few foals that had been born did not seem to share this aliment. Foal rearing was bound to keep the parents occupied enough not to succumb to their apathy.

Starfall shuddered at the thought of foals having foals, but considering all of them looked, sounded, and acted like they were in their late twenties and thirties, the point was rather moot. However, she doubted any of them were physically even Cloud Dancer’s age in truth. Had she really met Jer'rahd and the others eleven years ago? It had been ten since she first did the rain boom and eight since Cloud Dancer gained her cutie mark. Two since her sister was killed and a little over a year since the fall of Cindervale. Time flew by too fast. Six years ‘til she hit forty herself; of course, like General Shower, someone was going to have to tear her wings off before she retired. And even then she would probably fight to keep going.

“Sir?”

She whipped her head, cursing lightly at her zoning out.

“Sorry. What was it?”

“Do we have a plan?”

“Yes, but right now, we go see the harpies.”

==============================================

(Two Days Ago)

Rhede wished he had learned to walk and sleep at the same time. It was a skill he had heard about, but had never thought to try and learn, as he thought it was a joke. Now he wished he knew it just so he would have something to do.

They had entered the Zebra Lands earlier that day, their small caravan of guards on their way to the capital city, Asclepius. The few zebra that had been encountered had taken pains to stay away from the group of well-armed ponies. He had managed to talk to one or two to get the lay of what was going on, but aside from the warnings to steer clear of the south lands, there was nothing of any use.

It was not until they encountered a small group of zebras carrying what looked like all their worldly possessions that some information came their way. The three adult zebra and four foals were just as talkative as the others until one recognized Velkorn as the queen. After the usual bowing and scraping was over with, they told their story.

The group had been part of a larger village in the south lands, one that had been established after the defeat of the warlord and the rise of Velkorn to Queen. The group had settled on the edge of the Green Vale forest on the southern edge of the Zebra Lands. Everything was fine for a year or two, then zebras started vanishing.

At first it had been just one or two of the unwed adults. Most assumed they moved on to find their love or were lost somewhere. But in time, the disappearances became more frequent. Eventually, something was spotted dragging a villager away. The devil-horned creatures glowed red eyes, glaring at the one who spotted it as it left with the struggling captive. The witness had claimed its eyes floated above the treetops of the jungle before vanishing into the darkness. Several nights later, the witness vanished as well.

The exact description changed with each zebra in the small group, but some things remained the same. The creatures were described as zebras, twisted and stretched with evil, the fire glowing behind their eyes a warning of the death to come to any who met their gaze. All accounts made note of their misshapen shapes and the horns atop their head.

Rhede was at a loss, but Velkorn knew what they were.

[“Shadow walkers. They were only thought to still exist in myths and legends of the past.”]

That name did click with Rhede.

[“Shadow walkers? Didn't Blood Tail claim he was trained by someone he called that?”]

[“Yes, but I thought it was little more that bragging. Shadow Walkers are the dark lords of the lands. They were killed along with the Zebra God Kings when the first warlords rose up to destroy their masters. There have been rumors of their continued existence for some time, but never any proof. “]

Velkorn dipped her head a bit as Rhede looked around. They only had two dozen troops with them and most were earth ponies, with only one unicorn mage and a pair of pegasus scouts. If there was a big threat, they would be no match for it. Better to head to the capital and tell them.

[“Rhede, we need to head to this village and see for ourselves.”]

[“Somehow I knew you were going to say that, and no we do not. We need to head to the capital and let them know about this, let them deal with it. We are not here to fight someone else. We have our own mission.”]

[“The ones taken may still be alive. There will be no aid from any other zebra, no one will go near a place cursed by the shadow walkers. That is why these zebras fled rather than fight. Even if the curse of the land did not keep others away, they would not receive help from any others. You know enough of my race to know what the red marks on their cutie marks mean.”]

Rhede glanced at one of the adults, taking not of a line of red mixed in with the normally black-on-white cutie mark coloration all zebras had. He blinked a moment, trying to remember what it meant before the realization dawned on him.

[“Untouchables... delightful.”]

[“I may have freed them from the lowest rank of servitude my brother put them to, but their stigma still keeps them shunned from everyone as a whole.”]

Rhede shook his head. That this group managed to create and run their own village without aid was a surprise in of itself, but Velkorn was right. They would not receive aid from Asclepius; it was not something the zebra folk would do, even if their queen demanded it. Some cultural taboos still stuck fast.

[“Velkorn, we cannot do this alone. We do not have enough troops for any sort of rescue, particularly against some unknown force.”]

[“We will go.”]

[“Don’t make me pull rank on you.”]

[“Then I will go.”]

[“I am not going to let you march off to who the buck knows what alone.”]

[“Then we will go.”]

Rhede frowned, staring at the zebra, who did her best to hide a smirk.

“FINE, WHATEVER. ALRIGHT, EVERYPONY PACK IT UP. WE ARE MOVING OUT. CHANGE OF PLANS: WE HEAD SOUTH.”

Rhede continued the rant for a time as Velkorn looked off into the distance towards the south.

======================================================

(Two days ago. )

Starfall was not sure if this could actually be called a language. She had heard bird song that made more sense that then the eardrum-rupturing screams and squawks that were going on in this meeting hall.

The harpies reminded her of the diamond dogs in a sense as they had no definite size, shape, or coloration. Their torsos, heads, and legs to the knee were also seemingly the same as diamond dogs, save the scant covering of feathers and fur. They had no visible ears, however; just a crest of feathers, and the muzzles were beaks full of razor sharp teeth. They had wings rather than arms, though these had clawed 'hands' on the end of the first joint for manipulation. Below their knees, however their legs were clawed bird legs ending in talons.

An old rumor of their creation was that a diamond dog fell in love with a seagull at one point and brought about their existence. It was not wise to bring up that rumor around them, however.
Lion Heart and another one of her Shadowbolts stood on either side of her as she had addressed the delegation. The Shadowbolt, Blue Skies, had been brought along as a translator, though she was having difficulty keeping up with the rapid-fire manner of talking this council of harpies spoke in.
Lion Heart had simply been brought in as intimidation factor; compared to the other two, he looked like he was the size of Princess Celestia.

The initial meeting had gone well. The offer was fairly well-received, but the arguments started soon after. Skies had been struggling to keep up and was unsure whether the harpies were arguing over which group was going to be forced to help the ponies or which group was fighting to help the ponies.
Starfall had nearly had enough of it. Three hours of high pitched bantering from this ridiculous ruling caste they had, who ever heard of picking new leaders every four years? Was that even enough time to get anything done?

Blue Skies had explained that every four years there was an insane debate and scramble to scream the loudest about how one harpy or another was the best choice and why the others were not. If you could stand the screaming, sometimes it was amusing. Starfall was quite glad she missed that.

Blue Skies sighed, about to give up on keeping up. She was starting to skip words, barely uttering anything that was even a sentence as she was so far behind. Starfall was done with this. She drew in her breath, regretting that instantly at the smell that accompanied it from these creatures.

“SHUT UP!”

The sudden outburst of the pony had the entire council’s collection of fanged beaks turning her way in surprise, and more importantly, silence.

“Translate this, Skies.

The pegasus noded.

“Listen, this is simple: we are going to take down the griffons’ aerie in the northeast and the southwest. We are giving you the chance to help in this attack. If you help, once the aerie is cleared, it’s yours. You don't help, and the Lunar Republic will make sure no one can use it ever again, just like we did to Cindervale. It's not a slight against you, but we do not want Griffons that close to Equestria ever again. I am leaving now. If you get your forces to the spot I designated by dawn tomorrow, I will count that as you accepting. If you don't, then there's going to be a few less habitable mountains in the range.”

She turned and stormed, out followed by the other two, leaving the harpies to stare after them in shock.
As the door shut behind them, Lion Heart finally spoke up.

“While I do not doubt your ability, sir, how exactly are we going to destroy a mountain to the point it cannot be used if they do not aid us?”

“Beats me. But Jer'rahd said Rhede destroyed Cindervale, so if that pony can do it, how hard can it be? Besides, the point here is that they know we have done it and could do it again. That should get them motivated.”

“So what's the plan now, Sir?”

“Simple. We go kill some griffons.”

========================================================

(Yesterday)

The village was easy to find. Of course, at this point, there was nothing left of it. The whole place had been set on fire and burned to charred ash as soon as the small group of untouchables left the previous day. The single zebra from the group that had come back with them to show them the village swore the ramshackle collection of buildings had been intact when they left.

Velkorn had found shattered pottery with traces of some black oily substance scattered around the village. A brief test by a guard using flint and steel set the substance to blaze brightly with a sickly green flame.

[“Someone torched the place as soon as you were out of sight.”]

“Sir, I found some tracks.”

Rhede and Velkorn both trotted over to have a look at what the pegasus scout had found. The tracks were odd, made by cloven hooves and very far apart, as if the maker had been gliding across the ground, only touching down occasionally.

“Well, this is the strangest set of tracks I have encountered.”

Velkorn muttered to herself again and went off to talk with the untouchable that guided them there.

“Sir, I have a question.”

“Hmm? What’s that? Lieutenant Ramirez, right?”

“Yes sir, that’s right. I speak a little bit of zebra, but I am still rather green on the culture. What is the deal with this ‘untouchable’ stuff?”

“Ahh, I can give you a brief history lesson in it, I guess. Not like we can do much else at the moment. This one’s all General Velkorn's mission.”

“If you say so, sir.”

“Alright, you are familiar with the gods of other races, correct?”

“Not personally, sir, though I was in General Kaisur's unit when we rescued the civilians in Manehatten and I saw him fighting the Orc god.”

“Alright, nearly every race has one or more gods. Ponies have two, dragons had five, Diamond Dogs have nine at last count, the griffons have seven, and so on. Generally gods are born to the race when some unknown criteria is met, be it population or simply need. Minotaur and Elk do not have gods as their numbers are so small. Harpies, while their numbers are large, also do not have gods.”

“That is a little confusing, sir.”

“It's supposed to be; no one knows why gods are born or why, but the gods will have all aspects of what their race is. Dragon gods split that into the colors they represent but they are always pinnacles of that type.”

“So since Princess Luna and Princess Celestia are pony gods, they are alicorns, representing all three types of ponies?”

“Right. Zebras have two kinds as well; while there are no pegasus zebras, there are unicorn zebras, though they are very, very rare. Honestly, I can say I have only met one, and he was not a nice creature. They don't have the horns the way unicorns do, either. They have a small bump on their forehead that is like a gemstone.”

“Are you off subject sir? How does this lead to the untouchables?”

“Relax, I am getting to that. Alright. zebras do have gods as well. However, unlike the rest of the world, their gods are put to death as soon as they are born and identified as such. That may be why there are so few zebra unicorns, because the only difference between a zebra unicorn and a zebra god is that their cutie marks are fully red. And like ponies, they don't get that until later in life. It is often safer to kill the zebra unicorns than wait to see the cutie mark, ‘cause by then it could be too late.”

“That's... rather disturbing, sir. Why do they do that.”

“More history. Not long after the Discordian War, there were zebra gods. Five, I think, though I am unsure exactly. They had united the zebra lands to defend against Discord, though he never came this way. Once they had all the zebras under their rule, however, they found they liked it and started abusing their new power. They turned the entirety of their own race into slaves or breeding stock for themselves. They ruled over the lands as God Kings. About twelve hundred years ago, the slaves revolted. Guided by the spirits, a hoof full of slaves were brought to the site of a fallen star and instructed to make weapons of its metal. Using these weapons, the former slaves led their race to over throw and destroy the god kings, becoming the first Warlords of the Zebra lands. They decreed that any god born would be killed so as not to repeat the dark time in their history. Unfortunately, that marked them.”

“Marked them?”

“Zebra magic comes from the spirits rather than the self or stars like pony magic or the earth-like dragon magic. The God Kings were dead, but they still had pull on the spirit world where they ultimately resided. Not much, mind you, but enough for one last blight on their own kind. They marked the warlords’ offspring for all time so that the world would know who had killed them. Take a look at Vekorn's cutie mark you see how its only black and white; that's just like every other zebra out there, though there is sometimes gray. Now look at the Untouchable. See how his has that one red section on the spiral? That's the mark that the god kings left.”

“So what does that even mean?”

“At first, I assumed it meant nothing. The warlords that freed the zebras were still considered heroes, but then it was found out the descendants of anyone who killed a god started bearing that mark and it began to become tradition to have those already marked kill the gods as they were born. I guess after a time all the unpleasant tasks were given to the marked and a stigma grew up around them and they became untouchables. No zebra wants anything to do with one marked for fear of gaining a mark themselves. They developed purification rites and even a segregation system that has lasted a thousand years. Velkorn's brother broke down some of the cultural barriers by allowing mares to be recruited into his forces, something that was unheard of before and one of the few good things he did. The scant months Velkorn ruled, she broke down more. The Untouchables, however, remained, as that was too ingrained into the zebras’ culture to change. The same goes with the killing of the gods. It is the one task that even Velkorn agrees still needs to be done, and the untouchables are the only ones who are to do that, often under penalty of death if they do not comply. For while it is taboo to kill a god if you are not an untouchable, there is no such taboo in regard to killing an untouchable and burning the corpse.”

“That's pretty wild, sir.”

“Hah, you should let me tell you about some of the crap I know about seaponies sometime. That will flip you the buck out.”

Velkorn trotted over and the other zebra galloped off back towards where they had left the others from his village.

[“So did you find out what you needed to, Velkorn?”]

[“Aside from confirming that these are shadow walkers? No.”]

[“So what’s the plan, then?”]

[“There are twenty six missing, including three pregnant mares and several foals. We are going in after them.”]

[“Well, this should be fun.”]

Rhede turned to yell to the troops to get ready to move again before turning back to look down at the tracks.

[“I doubt this is one of your ghost creatures, Velkorn. This thing leaves rather deep tracks for something that’s a spirit.”]

[“The Shadow Walkers are not creatures of spirit. They are the ones who convinced the God Kings to take the paths they chose. They are the ones who taught our casters the dark magic of the dead. They are the ones who trained Blood Tail.”]

[“Bucking wonderful, just what we need to deal with: necromantic, manipulative monsters. Do you have any good news?”]

[“Yes; killing them is secondary in this. We need to rescue the ones they have taken. That should be an easier task than fighting them.”]

[“Often enough, it amounts to the same thing.”]

================================================================

[Current day]

Sunlight shone across the upper cloudscape, illuminating the white, fluffy tops with a brilliant glow that turned the rolling hills and mountains of cloud into a golden landscape right out of a dream. The only mar on this otherwise picturesque scene was the group of black-clad figures standing around a break in the clouds.

Starfall adjusted her goggles for perhaps the hundredth time, looking down into the gap in the clouds and at the mountain far below. The mountain range this was part of was on the northwestern edge of the Darklands. If not for the rain, she might have been able to see the lights of New Dullahan or even the remains of the great wall. The ruins of Cindervale were to the far east of where they were currently. The other two aeries were within sight of this one, though with the storm, they seemed little more than dark shapes against the backdrop of the night. Rain fell from the underside of the clouds, pouring down onto the mountain, grounding all but the most persistent griffon patrols.

Of course, why should this lot worry; this aerie was filled with noncombatants, and the main force of the Lunar Republic was attacking another aerie all together. That was not to say they were undefended, but the strength of the force that was left could not cover all the holes that had been left in the defenses. They had used a similar trick on the Discordian castles. While all the griffons were dealing with the main force, Starfall's unit would take this one and the harpies would attack wherever the other aerie reinforcements were drawn from.

Luna had sent her out to make a raid on one griffon aerie to show that the Lunar Republic was not to be trifled with. Starfall was making sure three would fall.

She checked the breathing spell one more time and adjusted the enchanted mask on her face. The outside of it was painted like an open maw of fangs. The rest of the unit with her was composed of all of her Shadowbolts. It was only thirty-six ponies, but they were the best fliers and fighters in Equestria, save perhaps Luna's Generals themselves.

“We go in five.”

A chorus of muted 'Yes sirs' greeted her time count. The harpies would be staging their assault now as well. The goal of this mission was simple: find the leaders of this aerie and kill them. The harpies had detailed the most likely locations in the aerie for the leaders to be in based on how they knew the griffon aeries were set up.

There was a possible bonus in this, however. One of these three aeries was home to Storm Ripper. The harpies thought he would be at the aerie under assault, leading as a god should. Starfall doubted a coward that would send his daughter to do his dirty work would be on the front lines.

She wanted this god’s head the way Wind Razor had wanted her family and friends as trophies. She placed her bet on the second aerie. It was close enough to the front that when the battle ended, he could fly forward and claim to have been instrumental in victory, yet far enough away that he could run if things went bad.

Starfall smiled, watching as two score of griffons lifted off from the aerie below, flying towards the one under assault by the harpies. Just as planned.

“Let’s go.”

Starfall stepped off the cloud, followed by Lion Heart and then the rest of the Shadowbolts, their dark forms falling from the sky along with the rain.

=================================================

[Current day]

Rhede did not like this place. The whole jungle creeped him out. If it had been a normal jungle, he would have been fine. Things here were far from fine, however. The whole place was covered with a bluish-purple mist. Velkorn showed no fear of it, so the rest of them followed suit, trying to ignore the way it clung to their legs and fur, making the skin underneath feel cold and clammy. A strange blue flower grew everywhere as well; Rhede did not recognize it until Velkorn pointed out it was the native version of poison joke. Unlike the Equestrian joke, however, most of this one’s symptoms were excessively painful. The guards avoided it like the plague.

Another thing that bothered him was the lack of noise. No birds, no insects, no animals. Aside from the hoof falls of the small group, the beat of the pegasi's wings, and the occasional clink of armor, the forest was soundless. Perhaps an acre in to the place, things got weirder.

Rhede spotted them first as he was still tracking the hoof prints. He froze, seeing dark forms hanging from the trees ahead; his eyes widened as he had a flashback to the Elk. He saw bodies dripping with blood hanging from limbs or by their necks strangled with vines and impaled with spears. Some still twitched and moved as if trying to call for help. Zebras, ponies, and even a few elk were strewn everywhere, and who knew how many other bodies were still hidden in the mist. Several of the Guards drew in their breath sharply, clearly catching sight of the bodies as well.

Velkorn, however trudged past them, pausing to look up at one of the forms before rising up on her hind legs and knocking it down out of the tree. Rhede winced at the blow, seeing a spray of blood from the hit and a pained expression on the face of the one who was hit. He was about to say something to her when he noticed what had hit the ground was little more than a bundle of sticks, bones and scraps of cloth.

“What the buck?”

“’Tis nothing but a simple spell, one that makes you think these things are the bodies of those you know well. To cause suffering with parlor tricks is how the Shadow Walkers get their kicks.”

The guards blinked, looking at each other and down at the stick pony.

[“What the heck is this, Velkorn?”]

[“It is dark magic. A simple spell, to be sure. I do not know what any of you saw, but when all I saw was my brother and his family hanging here, I knew it a trick by your reactions to it. Rhede, please inform the guards that we are likely to encounter more things like this and that they cannot trust just one or two of their senses.”]

[“Right.”]

Rhede took a moment to explain to the guards with them. The group grew a bit more sullen at this information, most having clearly just expected a simple escort mission. Now they had to worry about their minds being messed with as well. As they looked over the strange totems and fetishes surrounding them, it was one of the earth ponies that spotted the shadow walker. Major Dutch did not even hesitate yanking a spear from the quiver across his back and slinging it at the dark shape as he cried out a warning to the others.

A high pitched cry sounded and the black and white form turned to gallop off. Rhede got a fair look at the thing before it vanished into the jungle.

Its coloration was the same as a zebra, though there was no cutie mark. It looked as if something had fastened its hooves to the ground and pulled on its head, stretching the creature out like wet clay. Its legs were thin to the point where Rhede was not sure of how it supported the weight of the body and the elongated neck. Its joints seemed swollen up like thick knots on a rope, though that did not seem to hamper its ability to flee from them.

He rushed over with the rest of the Guards to the spot it had been. The Guard who had thrown the spear was swearing.

“I know I hit that thing dead on. I coulda’ punched a hole in a tree with that throw and the bucking thing ran off?”

“The shadow walkers are hard to put to an end; solely on your weapons you cannot depend.”

“Well that’s just bucking great, sir. We get our brains bucked with and now our weapons don't work? What are you going to tell us next, that they can fly and call the dead back to walk the land?”

Rhede trotted over, picking up the spear the green earth pony had thrown. The tip was covered in thick red blood.

“Calm down, Major. You wounded it, if nothing else. If it bleeds, we can kill it.”

Rhede tossed the weapon back to the Major, who looked it over before cleaning the tip off with some scraps from the totem that Velkorn knocked down. The small group set out again, following the new set of tracks and the small splatters of blood.

========================================

Starfall yanked the blade out of the griffon's chest with her teeth, her wing pressing the back of the other blade tight against the bird’s throat to prevent any sound escaping the dying beast. When she was sure it was little more than a corpse, she dragged it to a window, shoving it out to tumble down the mountain with the others they had taken out. That was the sixth guard that had been dispatched in the last fifteen minutes. None of her team was injured and the alarm had not been raised; a good start to the mission.

Down this hallway was the first place the griffon leaders should be, according to the harpies. She raised a wing and pointed at three of her Shadowbolts, motioning for them to guard this end of the hall and the large window that would be their escape from this point in the structure. Another three were sent to the far end to cover them as the rest made ready to enter the large room on the other side of the double doors this last set of griffons had been protecting.

Starfall took position near one door and nodded to Lion Heart, who took a spot on the other side. Several crossbows and blades were readied as the doors were opened. A blast of warmth washed over the rain-dampened ponies as a large fireplace in the room’s center filled the tightly-packed room with heat. The room was tall; the massive fire place stretching up into the darkness far above to an unseen ceiling. Piles of lumber and straw were stacked around the fireplace and a pair of older griffons tended the flame. One barely managed the start of a word in griffon before crossbow bolts ended the pair where they sat.

The group darted in, hoof falls muffled by their uniforms as they moved. Starfall scanned the towering area and the series of boxes lining the walls of the chamber going up into the darkness far above. One of her members flew up, pulling open a box and found it empty before tugging open a few more before discovering one that had something in it. Packed with straw to help keep it warm was a single white griffon egg.

The Shadowbolt flew up to the top and, opening more boxes, discovered perhaps a hundred eggs total in the room. There were ten boxes near the bottom that were gilded in gold and all filled with eggs. There was another large door at the very top that Starfall ordered to be jammed shut. She stood, looking into the fire a moment, thinking on what to do before she came to a conclusion.

“Take this straw, scatter it and the wood all over these boxes, and leave the egg doors open. Take a stick of wood from the fire and light the straw with it. Once the fire catches, we move on and seal the door behind us.”

“This is a bit much, isn't it, Sir?”

Starfall glared at Lion Heart, though she could tell some of the others were not keen on the idea, either.

“I do not see why you would have sympathy for any who will be raised from birth to hate us and want us dead. Consider how many were lost in the War of the North, and that was something the griffons called a skirmish. We are here to strike fear and terror into the griffons, to let them know what happens when they mess with Equestria. A few hundred fried eggs will be a nice start. Now move.”

Several of the other pegasi moved to follow orders, though a few seemed to find it too distasteful simply guarded the door. Lion Heart simply shook his head before joining those who were watching the door.

“I had expected my participation in horrific acts had ended when I left the dragons; I see that I was mistaken.”

“An eye for an eye, solider.”

“Does that only end when everyone is blind?”

“No, it ends when you kill the one who took your eye so they can't have the other.”

She looks up as the hatchery starts to burn, the blaze lapping against the leathery shells in the tight boxes. Starfall shivered a little despite herself before heading out the door, followed by the Shadowbolts who had lit the fires. The others closed the door as they exited, jamming steel spikes into the door jamb and breaking off the door handles so no one else could go in.

“With luck, we will be long gone by the time anyone finds this, or if they do, it will cause enough chaos that we can find someone important enough to warrant killing. Come on; we have two areas left to check on the harpies’ map.”

The group collected the guards at either end of the hall and moved on deeper into the aerie, the first wisps of smoke trickling from the gaps in the door.

===============================================================

“Bleu, hold up; there is the island.”

The blue dragon shifted her wings in flight, circling the small spot of land far below. She glided down hesitantly, landing atop a cloud and poking it experimentally to make sure it could hold her weight. She smirked as she bounced on top of it, amused at the springiness, much to Jer'rahd's terror and the Princess’s annoyance.

“Bleu, I did not give you that spell so you could play on the cloud tops.”

“Sorry, Luna, but this is just neat. And all pegasi can walk on these things? It feels like really squishy, yet semi solid mud.”

Luna hopped off the dragon’s back, leaving her general nearly hyperventilating as he clutched one of Bleu's spines. The Princess sighed as she looked at him; she would have left him at the castle if he had not been needed here. It was a testament to his willpower that he got on Bleu's back at all, knowing where she was going to be flying.

Granted, with the whimpering and general carrying on he had been doing, he did not convey any sort of image of strength at all once they took flight. This was the place he had gained that fear; this would hopefully be the place he got over it.

“So what’s the plan now, Princess?”

“To start with, I get Aqua's attention.”

“So what do we do, knock on the front door of her city and ask to borrow a cup of getting your ass kicked?”

“Something like that, yes. I have not been conserving my power for most of this year for nothing.”

Bleu raised an eye ridge, watching the Princess of War's horn start to glow brightly; the magic quickly swirled around the dark equine form, lifting her tail and mane into the spiral of power rising from her.
The Bearer of Laughter was unsure of what exactly the Princess was doing. Nothing seemed to be changing at all as far as she could tell, but she could feel the magical power pouring off the alicorn and it all seemed to be directed somewhere.

Bleu looked over the edge of the cloud down at the island far below and the light froth around it as the waves struck the false land mass’s shore. That froth seemed to spread slowly from the shore, large bubbles breaking the surface of the water. Bleu tilted her head as the island seemed to suddenly start trying to pull away from the sudden froth of bubbles. Steam began to fill the air as the foam and froth of the water grew larger surrounding the island.

The dragon glanced back at Luna, who had beads of sweat covering her form, eyes shut tight as more magic poured into whatever was being done. Bleu looked back down as a massive shadow started to grow under the surface of the frothing water.

The bubbles and froth spread wider, nearly as far as she could see of the ocean below; the foam easily was larger than Canterlot. Two points broke the surface at the edges of the foamy sea, rising up to tower above the roiling water’s surface. Smoke billowed out of the stony tips and molten lava bubbled over the edges of the conical top, turning the water to steam around them, although the lava inside seemed to be sinking down and draining away. The third peak rose as well, though the water simply ran off this dormant volcano.

Bleu saw the first rush of sea ponies swimming off along the surface away from the three mountains lifted out of the sea. Their escape was aided by a massive wave that had formed when the volcanic mountains had surfaced. As the peaks rose higher, Bleu saw the city stretched out between the peaks. Neighlantis. Luna had lifted the whole bucking city from the seafloor.

Bleu's jaw dropped as her gaze switched between the princess and the massive city that was just now seeing the light of the moon for the first time in its existence. Towers fell, crumbling under their own weight, lava spurting from the shredded volcanoes fell in great globs onto the city. Water coursed through the city, sweeping along any seapony unfortunate enough to be outside and throwing them from the island back into the sea along with tons of debris.

A roar echoed across the open ocean as a large whale-like creature thrashed in the center of the lifted island. Bleu winced at the unearthly sound, looking down at the flailing form of the leviathan Andree; the creature’s head was slick and unscathed from Starfall's attack on it.

“Crap. Guess Starfall didn't get the point for killing Andree after all.”

The island lifted higher from the surface of the sea, seeming to drift away from where it broke the water’s surface before it was dropped back into the ocean. The edges of the new island crumbled away, but the city itself and the draining volcanoes remained above the frothing water’s surface.

Bleu had expected it to sink again, but it remained steady. Perhaps Luna had dropped it on top of one of the other undersea mountains they had passed by on the first trip. In any event, the smell of fish and deep ocean funk reached her sensitive nose even all the way up here.

“By my own dead sexy tail, Luna, that was bucking awesome!”

“Thank you, Bleu. I move a celestial body through the skies every night. Moving a city, even one as gaudy as yours, was barely an effort once I was past the wards.”

Bleu blinked, confused.

“Gaudy as mine? What are you talking about?”

The Princess turned and looked behind the dragon, a sinister smile on her face. Bleu turned back as well, seeing the floating serpentine form of an incredibly pissed off Princess Aqua.

“Greetings again, Aqua. I gather I have your attention?”

“Knock knock, mother bucker, knock knock...”

The goddesses and even Jer'rahd looked at Bleu, who grinned sheepishly and shrugged.

“Sorry, best I could come up with that quick.”

=============================================

The crash of waves greeted the small group as they trotted out of the jungle onto a tropical beach. A few more traps had lain in wait for them, including a few spiked pits, which were easily avoided by the pegasus scouts. The other traps were simple snares or deadfalls; however, a swinging log caught one pony in the middle of the group.

The terracotta earth pony was flung across a clearing as a spiked log tore through the middle of the group, slamming into his side. Velkorn and the unicorn medic with them both charged across the clearing to the earth pony who had pushed himself upright already and was swearing as creatively as Starfall.

“Hawkings, calm down! Are you alright?”

“That bucking hurt!!”

He tore free a section of his armor, flinging it into the ground with a muffled curse. The steel was dented in and he would have some rather heavy bruising, but the spikes had not penetrated. Most of his complaints were about the scrapes he had got on his landing.

Rhede followed the trap’s release back to the loop of root that had triggered it, pointing that out to the scouts so it was seen next time. The rest of the trip to the beach was uneventful.

The black sand of the beach was an odd sight though out at sea was a large mountainous island. Smoke billowed from its top and a rosy glow licked along the edges of its peak.

“Oh lovely, another bucking volcano. Why is it that every bad guy we find has to live in a bucking volcano?”

“It’s a trendy location, perhaps, sir?”

“Stuff it, Major...”

“Sir, look there!”

Rhede looked over where the unicorn pointed out into the water at a dark shape that seemed to be swimming for the island. He regarded it for a moment.

“Dutch, can you hit it from here?”

“Easily, sir.”

“Take it out.”

“Yes, sir.”

The earth pony pulled a spear from the quiver at his side with his mouth. He watched the strange form for a few seconds before dashing a few paces forward, spinning suddenly up on his back hooves and releasing the spear, sending it arcing though the air. A wet thunk and a squeal could be heard over the crash of the waves and the shadowy form thrashed a bit before dropping under the water.

“Nice shot.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“I started on spears myself back in basic training, but I switched to daggers before long. The spears never flew right for me out of jealousy.”

“What?”

One of the other earth ponies facehoofed.

“He's talking about his dick, Dutch. The spears were jealous of his dick.”

“I would have got that eventually, Blain.”

“Least he didn't compare it to a hammer like Poncho does.”

Rhede glanced back at the other pegasus, Anna, curiously, then to the earth pony she was talking about. Poncho simply smirked in his direction.

“Dun wanna know. Ramirez, Anna, go bring the body back to shore. I want to have a look at this Shadow Walker.”

“Yes, sir”

Rhede trotted over to Velkorn, who stared at the island from the edge of the water.

[“Let me guess, you want us to go there?”]

[“Yes.”]

[“Wonderful.”]

Rhede turned back to the ponies on the beach.

“Alright, all of you start cutting up some trees. Re-purpose that deadfall if you have to. I want a boat made ten minutes ago.”

“Best you can hope for from us, sir, is a lousy raft.”

A small chuckle ran through the group and Rhede sighed.

“Fine, I will take that so long as it can get us to that island.”

A chorus of 'Yes sirs' greeted him this time. He smirked, wishing they had been this talkative on the trip here. He turned back as the pegasi flew out to the body, slowly dragging it back to shore, his hooves kicking at the sand while he waited. Velkorn had yet to move from staring out at the island.

The pair of pegasi dragged the body to the breakers. Rhede ran into the water to help drag it the rest of the way onto the beach. He turned, coughing and sticking his tongue out and dipping his head to take a mouth full of seawater, swishing it and spitting it out as he coughed.

“By the stars, that’s foul!”

“That's why we tied a rope to it, sir. It’s covered in paint.”

“Paint?”

Velkorn seemed curious as well, finally turning from the island to look over the corpse. The spear had indeed found its mark, right through the eye of the creature. They were never going to hear the end of it from Dutch on this.

The body was indeed stretched out; the neck of it was as tall as Rhede if he was standing on his back legs. A short-cropped strip of mane ran from the head all the way down the neck’s length to the back. The head was vaguely pony-shaped, albeit thinner. The horns on its head were rounded nubs capped in some sort of metal to give them points. The rest of the body also seemed lengthened unnaturally, its legs nearly as long as its neck with the joints swollen as if infected.

The black and white paint had been mostly washed off in the water. Its real fur coloration was cream with brown spots. An orange cutie mark of a unknown symbol graced its flank.

“Well, this is the weirdest thing I have seen in a while.”

“I agree with that, too; also, its tongue is blue.”

Rhede pulled the saddle bag off of it, rummaging through the pouches as Velkorn continued to examine the body. There was not much inside aside from something that looked like its lunch, a few more pots of paint, and a soggy book that he tossed to Velkorn.

Velkorn carefully flipped through the book, sighing slightly, as most of the ink had run from the water. The few lines that were intact were written in a language neither she nor Rhede understood.

They both looked up from the book as one of the guard ponies trotted back down the beach from the woods, whistling lightly. He paused, looking over the body curiously before pulling the spear from its eye.

“Cripes, Major Dutch does not need to see where he hit it.”

“Something happen, Dillion?”

“No sir. We finished the boat, though.”

“No way; you have only been gone about five minutes.”

“Yes, well, turns out we are better ship builders than we thought. Should have been my cutie mark instead of a short sword. Ahh, here come the others with it now.”

Rhede glanced back, waiting to see what horrid contraption this lot cobbled together. His eyes widened at the twin-hulled sail boat that slipped around along the shoreline around a copse of trees. The craft was large enough that the entire group could board and ride it to the island with no problem. A large silk sail was colored a light gray to help it blend into the sky while on the water. Rhede's jaw dropped as the group on board waved, turning the ship to park it on the sandy beach.

“Funny thing is, sir, we didn't have this thing on the water for five minutes when we discovered a stowaway. I guess our boat building skill brings all the things to the yar...”

“That was the worst pirate joke I think I have ever heard, Dillion.”

“Not a fan of nautical nonsense?”

Dutch hopped off the ship and walked over to the group to retrieve his spear.

“I could see that pun coming, Dillion.”

“Geez, Major, no need to get crabby that you didn't come up with it first.”

Rhede winced with each new pun as Ramirez piped in.

“Now, now, you guys are being a little shellfish in keeping these puns to yourself and not sharing them with the rest of the squad.”

“You know you shore are right about that.”

“By the stars, you lot should be working with Bleu.”

“Who do you think chose us to go on this mission with you, sir?”

“Enough. Let’s get going; the sun is setting and I don't want to be on this ocean at night.”

=====================================================

“Did you really think I... GAH!!!”

Luna was not sure of what Aqua was planning to monologue there, but she did not really care to hear it. Still, it felt rather strange cutting her off like that. Perhaps next time she would let whoever she was fighting finish their speeches before she acted, just to see if that somehow made things feel a little better.

Her gaze turned from the charred sea pony goddess, watching as she splashed back into the ocean. One fireball was not going to be the end of Aqua no matter how nice it would be. For the moment, Luna simply wanted a bit of distance from her foe.

“General, I need you to snap out of this and go deal with the leviathan.”

“I don't think he’s listening Luna. He's been biting off one of my spines since we took off.”

“Kaisur, I did not bring you along to simply sight see. I need you to change into the beast and keep Aqua's pet busy so I can deal with her without any interference.”

Again, the gray unicorn did nothing but cower on the dragon’s back. Luna snorted in annoyance.

“FINE! Bleu, get this out of my sight; I cannot guard him and deal with these two at the same time. I had hoped your loyalty to your Princess was stronger than this stupid fear of yours. I see that is not the case.”

“That's a little harsh Luna.”

“This is a life-or-death situation that has just become that much worse for me solely because I could not depend on him.”

Jer'rahd muttered something.

“What was that, boss?”

The grip on her spine loosened, though the teeth marks already there could easily be seen on the armored spike.

“I said throw me at the damn monster ‘cause I am not going to be able to do it myself at this point.”

Bleu chuckled and Luna smirked.

“Yep, reckless as ever, boss. You sure this is alright?”

“Thank you General. It will be fine, Bleu. Do it.”

Bleu leaped into the air, sending Jer'rahd tumbling down her back with a yelp. She whipped her tail hard, sending the unicorn flying off the cloud and arcing towards the island and the floundering leviathan on its surface.

“I did not make out what he was saying as you flung him, Bleu.”

“Well if you take out the swearing, it wasn't really a sentence.”

“Yes, well, get to a higher point in the clouds, Bleu. I need you to stay out of this fight as you are to be our ride back. I doubt either of us will be up to swimming.”

“Geez, so I am just transportation now?”

“Bleu, this is a fight between four gods. It would be best if you are not in the middle of it.”

“Four? What are you talking...”

A roar cut her off; a sound out of a nightmare that had ruptured the line between dream and reality to pursue those that had escaped it in slumber. That roar was answered by a scream that sounded as if the sole purpose of its creation was to cause pain and suffering. Bleu visibly paled before looking over the cloud bank at the massive scaled form of Jer'rahd's beast as it slammed into the newly-raised city of Neighlantis.

The previously-floundering leviathan raised itself up, fins snapping and ripping as they formed clawed legs, giving the massive thing the look of an oversized mutant alligator. It rose up on its six new limbs, answering the challenge issued from the monster Jer'rahd had become.

“I expected as much of that one.”

“What the heck are you talking about, Princess?”

“I see someone has found my books.”

Bleu whipped her head back around, her gaze falling on the undamaged form of Aqua in the air behind them again, already in a stare-down with Luna. The bubble of water around the seapony was hissing into steam already just from the looks the two were giving each other.

“Yeah, I think I am gonna go over there now. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY over there.”

=================================================

Jer'rahd remembered screaming as he fell. The terror of the ocean rushing up to meet him was almost too much to focus past to cast the spell. Once he started, however, the beast rushed forth as if only a paper-thin veil had kept it in check. He felt his consciousness slip away from his body, the shadows wrapping around his form adding to his bulk and mass until there was nothing left on the outside that even remotely resembled him.

He exhaled as the fear leaved him, his gaze shifting over the gray and pale red world he was in now. Two great disks of light cast no illumination, but looking into them allowed him to see what was going on with the beast, though there was nothing to offer him control. Thankfully, he did not have to control anything; the beast’s instinct kicked in and it launched itself at the leviathan.

He was not really inclined to watch anyway, but something else was bugging him. This place seemed bigger than the last time he was here. Last time he had been here, there had been a gray floor, for lack of a better term, and a red sky as far as he could see. Now the floor was black and gray and the sky was a myriad of colors ranging from white all the way to a dark reddish-brown that looked like fired clay.
It felt even more alien to him than before. It was as if this was something else’s mind, not the beast’s. The whole thing was setting him on edge. His gaze swept over the featureless plane trying to figure out what was off.

“Well, at least you seem to have the sense to know something is wrong with your little world. Perhaps you are not as stupid as I initially thought, though that is still not saying much for your mental capacity.”

Jer'rahd turned his head, looking for the source of the voice. It should be easy to find, considering the space in here was featureless, but he saw nothing until the second look around. A lounge chair sat directly between the two large pools of light with a pink beach umbrella set up over it. In the chair, sipping out of what appeared to be a coconut with a smaller umbrella in it was a sky blue earth pony sporting a black mane and tail with red stripes. Jer'rahd could not clearly see his cutie mark, but it seemed to be a serpent wrapped around a spear.

“Who the buck are you?”

“My, my, so brash and impulsive. No wonder she found you interesting. She probably still does, and we cannot have that. It’s always bad when she gets interested in other ponies.”

The pony rose dusting himself off, the umbrella and chair vanishing from behind him. He flung the drink over his shoulder and that fades as well.

“My name, Jer'rahd Kaisur, is Andrew Rose Legosah, or as my mistress has taken to calling me, Andre.”

“You're the leviathan?”

“Don't act so surprised; you are a monstrous beast yourself at the moment, currently trying to tear my face off. What should surprise you is that we can talk like this in such close proximity. Honestly, I blame the books, but then again, I have also trained to be the master of my own mind for several thousand years. Putting myself into your head when you are not in it either is foal’s play.”

He trotted around Jer'rahd, not really seeming to care to explain that further.

“I am sooo much more than that however. I am a former Element Bearer of Loyalty for Princess Aviana, as well as her former lover, though she had many of those: Discord, Forgescale, that Blueblood lout. A right proper little slut goddess that one was. But I suppose the most important thing here is what I was till that little piss-ant friend of yours murdered all of them. I was the founder and head of The Order and the one who suggested to that noble twat to use Scarlet to kill you.”

==================================================================

Things had gone bad fast. The upper door had led into the aerie's guard quarters and when smoke started billowing out of the hatchery, it was quickly noticed and an alarm sounded. With so many griffons rushing around now, Starfall's group was quickly spotted and the stealth mission had rapidly turned into a running battle. She had lost two of her group already and a third was too injured to fight, though he pressed on with the others, staying off his nearly-severed leg.

She urged the group on as they had yet to find any form of leader to take out. Rounding a corner, they came face-to-face with a rather large collection of griffons armed for bear. She was about to order a fallback when Lion Heart stepped forward, seeming to try to hack up a hair ball before he exhaled a cone of acidic spray that struck the armored griffons and reduced the large half-dragon to a coughing fit for a moment. The griffons’ armor and weapons started to melt , along with their fur, feathers, and flesh, the thick acid spreading about as they flailed and the group had to pull back to avoid getting any on themselves.

She looked at the half-dragon who seemed ill from the effort.

“Do not expect any more of those, sir. It takes a day to build up the bile...”

“I didn't expect that! I didn't even know half-dragons could do that.”

“Not all of us can. Usually, it is only those of black dragon decent; it is highly unpleasant.”

“Sir, we need to move.”

“Right; head to the next point and cover Silver Coin ‘til we get to a window. Coin, you head back to the rendezvous as fast as you can and get something better than a blood stanch on that leg.”

“I can still fight, sir.”

“Buck that; you're slowing us down enough as it is. When I say go, you bucking go!”

“Yes, sir.”

The small group made their way rapidly through the halls, pushing the griffons back and keeping on the move to make an organized resistance against them harder. During one of the lulls in combat, they managed to gain a defensible position at a large window. Silver Coin flew up, shattering the stained glass image of a silver griffon holding a sword and a shield before slipping out the hole. The others made to move again when the injured pony poked his head back in.

“Sir! You might want to look at this.”

“What is it?”

Starfall flapped up and looked out the window. She turned back to her troops firing crossbows at griffons gathering at the ends of the halls before doing a double take to look again.

A dark wall took up the horizon; a low roar could be heard but not identified. At first, she thought it was just the thickness of the rain that was giving the appearance of a wall. The flash of lightning glinted off the wall and glistened of water. A few lights dotted its surface and it took Starfall a second to realize they were fires. Large ships had caught fire as they were tossed about in the massive wave that was crashing towards them. The frothing water at the top began to crest as it smashed into the first mountainside in the distance, closing quickly on the aerie they were in.

“By the stars... FLY, EVERYPONY, FLY! GET AS HIGH AS YOU CAN! ABANDON MISSION! GO GO GO!!!”

As the tidal wave drew closer, the dark forms of the pegasi were glimpsed in a lightning flash along with several score of griffons hot on their tails.

=================================

Rhede was not sure if he could be more annoyed than he was right now; it was borderline angry, but he could not quite make it all the way with this group, much like he was most of the time with Bleu. He had spent the entire trip into the zebra lands trying to get some of these soldiers to talk to him and getting nothing; now they would not shut up. Granted, he had wanted conversation and all they were doing now was a pirate chantey. What was worse, as they sailed towards the island, Velkorn was even joining in singing lines of the song in Zebra. So much for the stealth approach.

“What will we do with a drunken sailor?
What will we do with a drunken sailor?
What will we do with a drunken sailor,
earlee in the morning?”

“Stuff him in a sack and throw him over.
Stuff him in a sack and throw him over.
Stuff him in a sack and throw him over,
earliee in the morning.”

Rhede sighed as the entire group started in on it at once now, caterwauling loudly enough that anything with ears would know they were coming. He would tell them to shut it, except Velkorn was greatly amused by this and with her mood lately, he could not bring himself to ruin it.

“Feed him to the parasprites for dinner.
Feed him to the parasprites for dinner.
Feed him to the parasprites for dinner,
earliee in the morning.”

[“Way Hey and up she rises.
Way Hey and up she rises.
Way Hey and up she rises
erliee in the morning “]

Rhede stuck his tongue out in disgust, ears flattening to his head as the verses got more morbid. He shifted his hoof on the rudder, adjusting the small craft towards an inlet on the island that seemed a fitting place to dock. He looked up at the volcano, a little confused as he no longer saw the glow or smoke from the top of it. Perhaps this was just a bad angle to see it, though that did not explain the lack of smoke.

“Shoot him through the heart with a loaded crossbow.
Shoot him through the heart with a loaded crossbow.
Shoot him through the heart with a loaded crossbow,
erliee in the morning.”

“Slice his throat with a rusty cleaver.
Slice his throat with a rusty cleaver.
Slice his throat with a rusty cleaver,
erliee in the morning.”

The only thing Rhede could think of was that the fire in the volcano went out or the lava receded. Then again, perhaps there had been no lava and the glow and smoke were just a large bonfire in a dormant volcano or on top of a plateau. That made more sense as to why it would go out like it did.

[“Way Hey and up she rises.
Way Hey and up she rises.
Way Hey and up she rises,
erliee in the morning.”]

The squad cried out cheering, complimenting Velkorn on her singing voice, even though none of them seemed to know what she was saying. Rhede felt a pang of jealousy, though he did his best not to act on it.

“Are you lot done announcing our presence to the entire island?”

“I call it good old-fashioned putting the fear of the goddess into them. They know we are coming and can't do a bucking thing about it. Isn't that right, you delightful ship’s mast head thingy?”

Dutch laughed, looking at the head of the Shadow Walker jutting up from under the boat. Somehow, the group of them had caught this one unaware, knocked it out, and tied it along the underside of the ship between the two hulls that made up the craft. Dutch claimed it was to keep it out of the way so everyone could ride. Granted, it had been gagged half way into the trip as it had started screaming things out no one understood. That was about the time the pirate chanties started.

Rhede was not sure if this was how they always acted or if this squad just got crazier the more dangerous the situation. No wonder Bleu liked them. Perhaps since they were getting more comfortable with him and Velkorn, they were opening up a bit more.

The small craft struck the shore, sliding up onto the sand. The prisoner whimpered as the group disembarks.

“Ramirez, Anna, take to the skies and keep high. Report back any signs of the hostages or enemy placements. Blain, Pancho, you two guard the boat. The rest of you stick close together; we don't know what to expect here.”

“Yes, sir.”

[“Well, Velkorn? Any insight?”]

[“This place is just as alien to me as it is to you, Rhede. All I know is that many of the things that have plagued my homeland have come from this island, as well as many of the things that have plagued me. This island is considered cursed and forbidden I am sure.”]

[“Great, a source of evil. That's just what I wanted to trot in to with barely twenty ponies.”]

[“We have survived worse odds.”]

[“True, but I don't need this to be what was prophesied.”]

Velkorn's ears perked.

[“Oh? Something I should be concerned with? You have been rather tight-lipped about your vision from your trial.”]

[“I will continue to be as well.”]

[“If it is important, then it needs to be known. Judging by your concern, it seems it is.”]

Rhede looked at her for a moment before sighing and glancing back at the squad pulling the boat ashore as they waited for the pegasi to return.

[“My vision was of me dying. Because of what I did, others died as well who might have survived otherwise.”]

He looked to her before snorting, annoyed that he was telling her this.

[“I would prefer that if others had to die because of me, you were not one of them.”]

Velkorn stared at him for some time and Rhede started feeling uneasy at the gaze.

[“This is why you push me away? Because of a vision?”]

[“Half of them have come true already. I have no reason to think the others will not as well. And this is not the time to discuss that.”]

He started to move off when he felt a pair of teeth clamp onto his tail and yank him backwards. He staggered a bit, whirling to come face-to-face with Velkorn. Her eyes bore into his and he could not help but to look away first.

[“If I am to die because of your vision, I would know why you accept any other female that exists, yet spurn my attentions as if I am diseased.”]

Rhede looked as if he was going to try and walk away again, but another glare from Velkorn showed the results would be the same.

[“You should find someone else to focus on. You're too damn good of a pony to be bothering with someone like me. You help anyone who needs it no matter what they have done. You’re too pure a soul for me to be the one to sully.”]

[“Is it my choice to make on who it is that will 'sully' me, Pelt?”]

[“Not when it’s me taking myself out of your equation the best I can.”]

[“You talk so down on yourself, and yet you obviously don't get it do you?”]

[“Clearly.”]

[“You act like and seem to think you are tainted, but you are not. You have killed an entire organization to protect your friends and family because you knew if any lived, those friends would be a target again. You destroyed an entire race of creatures because of what they did to a mare you didn't care about and the foal she had from you, a cycle that had been going on for hundreds of years and you stopped it. The few elk survivors can rebuild and not have to worry about avoiding their own kind for fear of being killed now due to a mad ruler. You went out of your way to save me from Blood Tail going so far as to put yourself in the way of an unknown spell so that I would not be harmed by it. You had the chance to do anything you wanted by accepting my first offer to rule these lands at my side and you refused to be named king, citing that there would be someone better along. Almost everything you do in some way benefits your family or friends and you barely ask for anything in return. All you see is the darkness of what you are doing, simply because you cannot bring yourself to see the light of it. That is what attracts me to you, nothing so shallow as your looks as you seem to think, though I will not say they are not an intriguing factor as well.”]

Rhede turned, looking at the zebra mare who was panting with anger and rage after that rant, clearly pissed at him, though he could not really say why. At the moment, however, he really just wished the ocean would swallow him up just so he could get away from her stare.

“TIDAL WAVE!!!!”

The group turned to see Ramirez flying franticly towards the group. In the distance behind him, a massive wall of water was rapidly approaching the island.

“I didn't bucking mean that thought!”

[“WHAT?”]

“RUN! EVERY PONY GET TO HIGHER GROUND NOW!”

The group took off in a full gallop with Ramirez leading the way, heading towards the volcano as the wave drew closer.

=========================================

“What the buck do you mean you founded the order?”

“Exactly as I said. You are quite dense for a unicorn. The moment I found out that you were spawn of Aviana and were named a Element Bearer, I knew that it was time to kill you. Just one of those would have attracted my Goddesses's attention if she had known. Both, well, both might have made you her favorite over me.”

“There's that damn name again. Who the Buck is Aviana?”

“Ignorant of history as well; I suppose there’s no hope for that given how long ago it was. Six or seven thousand years by my count. Aviana was the previous goddess of ponies before Luna and Celestia. She was Celestia's mentor for a time and the bearer of magic to my Element of Loyalty. Granted, she betrayed that loyalty as well as everyone else who thought her a friend. Aqua and I were the only ones to escape that mare’s traitorous nature unharmed. Butterfly Smiles, however, fared the worst of the lot of us.”

“You're a massively fat whale, and Aqua is an evil fish bitch. I would hate to see how the others fared if you two are the ones that escaped.”

The earth pony snorted in annoyance.

“Typical of one who carries that mare’s blood in his veins. Arrogant and self centered.”

“I don't recall a goddess being in my family tree.”

“You are a Blue Blood, despite disowning them. That family is all offspring of Avaiana. Your blood is highly diluted, but you remain of her ilk. My fears were confirmed when you visited and my princess took an immediate liking to you, because of your damned eyes no less.”

“Great, my one scar that doesn't still sting occasionally and it’s the one that's cause me the most trouble. If you founded the order, why the heck did you steal the elements, anyway?”

“I had used them before, and we all saw what they did to the former Bearer of Laughter. Sealed in stone by that mare’s evil. Misguided fool. I could not stand to see them used on my Princess, so I convinced the ones who bore the elements for Luna at the time to seal them away. I had plenty of accomplices in that and when the time came for the bearers to pass to the next life, I convinced them to become the guardians of the elements. All of them we so set in their ideals that I thought no pony would ever match the lofty standards they set for a bearer... seems I was incorrect on that calculation.”

Jer'rahd growled glancing at the lenses that lead out into the world where the giant creatures were ripping gouts of flesh from one another, the blows healing back nearly instantly.

“And how did a fat whale like you manage to convince anyone?”

“I don't have to be in this form, I simply prefer it. My Princess likes it, so I stay in it unless she wishes otherwise. Occasionally, I return to my normal form to sate any... needs she may have developed in dealing with the lesser toys she keeps.”

“As much as I want to kill you right now, that does not seem to be happening here. I don't think we can do damage to each other that sticks.”

Jer'rahd looked back out the window before a hit sent him flying into the air. He crashed hard, tumbling across the ground. He rolled back to his hooves, looking at the other pony who simply grinned at the unicorn from where he had run up and kicked him.

“Not entirely true, my dear annoyance. While our physical bodies cannot harm one another, considering we are made from the same shadow stuff, here in this place, I can bludgeon your stupid little unicorn head in and you can't even cast a single spell to try and stop me.”

===========================================================

“So the replacement returns, and bringing back the books your predecessor stole from meh too. Don't look so surprised Luna, I can sense them, the same as you can, though with this little bit of nonsense, I doubt you are here just to return them.”

Aqua glanced down off the cloud at the fighting monsters below that were destroying what was left of Neighlantis before snapping her gaze back to Luna.

“Let us get this started then, shall we? It seems I have a city to rebuild... again.”

Lightning launched from the sea goddess’s fins, ripping across the clouds and dissipating them in its wake. The clouds around them rumbled and shook as a storm began to form under the pair set off by the gathering magics.

Luna launched herself skyward, her horn glowing and firing a series of dark bolts of energy at the sea goddess, who darted out of the way, swimming though the air as if it was water. The clouds around them drew closer as more powerful blasts of darkness ripped holes in the gathering cloudscape. Fire, ice, lightning, and shadow screamed and arced though the air between the two as they both ducked and dodged, casting spells about like it was nothing. Neither was landing a hit, however, though Luna was hard-pressed. Aqua simply seemed to grin as she effortlessly dodged anything the Princess of Night threw at her.

Luna flung up a shield, blocking Aqua's escape as a fireball flew at her, though the sea pony countered with a ball of water that rapidly turned to steam as the spell hit.

“Well, I see the childish games have been finished. Shall we play for real now?”

The seapony blurred suddenly, vanishing, before appearing over Luna and lashing out with her long tail, smashing the Princess through the cloud bank she was standing on and down into the pouring rain from the gathered clouds. Luna strained to remain airborne in the deluge. She glanced up at the seapony's throaty laugh.

“You may rule the night, Luna, but the water is mine. All of it. You will never beat me here.”

============================================================

The wave crashed against the mountains, flinging rock and debris into the air, the great landmasses reducing much of the wave’s size as it broke against the range, taking many of the mountains with it and turning the valleys and passes between them into a frothing torrent of raging water. As the wave broke, huge tongues of water and rock were flung into the air. The Shadowbolts all strained to stay ahead of the furious onslaught. The griffons below them were not as lucky, and the breaking wave washed away more of their number as the water seemed to chase them into the air after slamming into the aerie.

Starfall risked a glance back, her eyes widening under the goggles seeing how close the griffons were to their tails, and more importantly, the large bird in the lead struggling to keep ahead of the water.
The massive bird had an odd gray coloration and was dressed in fine, if tattered, robes and was covered in jewelry. That had to be Storm Ripper. Lightning crashed over head, the flash illuminating the belt holding that robe around his form… and the series of tails and furs dangling from it.

The pegasus screamed out in rage, flipping back around and flying down at the griffon as fast as she could, her blade already gripped in her teeth. The two collided in midair, the force of Starfall's decent knocking the much larger griffon back and sending them both into the churning water below.

The Shadowbolts watched in horror as their general vanished under the crashing waves and the tons of rock being thrashed about in the water.

=============================================

“MOVE, MOVE, MOVE! GET HIGHER THAT WATERS STILL RISING.”

For the first time in his life, Rhede wished he was a pegasus and able to fly away from all this nonsense. The wave had swept over the beach behind them and the earth pony guards were charging up the side of the volcano as fast as their legs would carry them. Thankfully, Ramirez had found a wide path for them to use. Unfortunately, the water had also found that path and was rapidly rising up the side of the mountain, pushing along trees, debris, and the boat they had come in on, screaming Shadow Walker included.

Rhede whirled as he ran, flicking his tail and sending a pair of daggers from it into the throat of the Shadow Walker, killing it just before the boat was pulled under the wave and ripped apart by flooding water.

Velkorn glanced at him, though she saved her breath for running. As they rounded a bend, they come across three non-painted, though armored, Shadow Walkers, whom the squad simply galloped past, much to the surprise of the tall creatures. The trio barely had time to scream out as the churning wave rushed over them, grinding them up with everything else that was swept along.

The wave slowly started to subside as they neared the top of the volcano. The pegasus, Ramirez, was nowhere to be seen in the air. As they stopped to catch their breath, the water remained high and only very slowly seemed to recede.

“That was nuts!”

“Right. Dutch, get the troops to secure the perimeter. Velkorn, are you alright?”

“I think that should be my line, but do not worry, I am fine.”

“General, we have contact.”

Rhede looks up from where Velkorn was panting to the tree line where Pancho was pointing. Easily three score of armed zebras were walking towards them; there was also about a dozen Shadow Walkers behind them. They were all armed with primitive weapons, but they seemed quite capable of using them.

[“By the stars, we are too late.”]

[“What? Velkorn whats going on?”]

[“Look at their eyes; their souls are gone. This is what Blood Tail wanted to use on me, as he only cared for my body and rank over everything else. We are in trouble here.”]

“Well buck. What else can go wrong?”

The ground under the group rumbled violently as the sky lit up with flickering lights that did not seem to be lightning. There was no sound from the strange colors and it seemed to be bright, far off in the distance over the ocean. Rain began to pour down, just as the ground quaked again, harder, the rocks around them bouncing and cracking from the violence of it. The rumbling grew even worse as Rhede screamed into the rain.

“OH COME ON!!!!”

It was about then that the ground dropped out from under them. Rhede and the guards cried out as the mountainside they were on collapsed under them. As he plummeted towards the crashing water below, Rhede saw Velkorn still on the ledge with the Zebras and Shadow Walkers rushing towards her before his vision was blocked by the waves.

==========================================

Luna plummeted towards the water below, her wings out, electricity still crackling between her feathers from the hit she took. She grossly under estimated Aqua's power. She thought with the books she would have an advantage, but it seemed the sea pony queen had studied them a great deal more in depth than she had.

“Well something like that, anyway, Princess.”
“Seriously, the bitch had teams of the fishy ponies looking us over, getting their slimy fins all over my pages, disgusting.”

The goddess of the night strained, stretching her wings out further and catching the air. She pulled up from the dive and climbed back into the sky.

She glanced down, eyes widening as a large section of the sea drew up from the surface. It reared up like a snake before lunging up after her, its maw filled with shards of coral and rock.

“We can, of course, help you, Princess. We have no desire to return to the sea, and you still have one god left to kill before your first contract is done.”
“Better think quick, ‘cause that thing look like its gonna hurt.”

Luna tried to fly faster, her wings straining as the snake gained on her, the mocking laughter of Aqua high overhead. What the buck could they ask for this time?

“Just that you take out more than just the dragon gods. The Griffons, the Diamond dogs and even the zebras have gods that need to be removed, although it seems one of your Generals is going to make the Griffon god death tally easier.”
“And if the little goody-two-hooves lives, she might just finish another one or at least have someone kill it.”
“What have you got to lose by doing something you had planned on anyway, Princess?”

Luna winced as her wings cramped, the shadow of the serpent’s maw starting to close around her.

---------------------------------

Twilight pulled back into the starry void. This was a great deal to take in. She knew this was the very edge of what she was after all this time. There was already a ton of things to look over and consider just from what she had seen. This had to be the pivotal point just before Nightmare Moon fully awakened, she could feel it. The books were clearly a catalyst in this as well, more so than anyone seemed to know. These events were clearly the start of how the Element bearers became the Five Beasts of the Moon.

By Celestia, it was getting late. She glanced back at the star with her own face in it, wondering if Dash had fallen asleep already. She could hold on the rest of this until later and get a full grip on what was going on. She should be able to stand a little bit of suspense for a while.
She turned, heading to exit the starry void.

Comments

[LunarLover]

I would have seriously read this if I had the time. I don't want to be some ape guy but I always thought 3-6k words was the usual amount?

[Midnightshadow]

I think I would like to read this story, but the fact you cannot settle on a tense between past, present and present perfect is quite frankly driving me up the wall. With over 400k of words written in this mish-mash, it's going to be prohibitive to expect you to fix it, too.

I will try to get into it, it has promise, but skimming the first and last chapters I can see you've not rectified these basic mistakes, so that and the talking heads I saw examples of may mean this is one promising story I give a miss.

[Obsidian]

1491738 - Honestly? I can't see the problem. I thought it was formatted properly, it's all done from a POV standpoint. I won't say that there might not be an error here or there, but it's all accurate as far as I'm concerned.

[Bryceeden]

Great chapter, can't wait for the next one.

[Midnightshadow]

1492050
If you can't tell the difference between past and present tenses, then please don't ever take up reviewing. Other than that (and the talking heads I spoke of) it's an intriguing story, but the flaws jerk me out of the narrative flow so harshly that they may prove to be entirely too distracting. At almost 500k words, it's painful to see what is obviously a labour of love flounder so badly.

[Obsidian]

1492407 - One... I know the difference between tenses. Two... The story is written from different points of view, and changes frequently, it's entirely possible your not keeping up with that. Provide some examples if you think it's so continuous.

[Midnightshadow]

1492422
If you're switching tenses within a paragraph, you're doing it wrong. This story does it continuously, from the very first paragraph in the very first chapter:

Twilight fell back, eyes wide as she stared in horror. The garden grew quiet again, the echo of the scream fading into the hedgerows. Even at the full light of noon the Canterlot Royal Gardens had suddenly a very sinister look to her. She lifts her gaze, watching as the last of the pony's flesh was consumed once more by stone.

(also coincidentally missing a few very important commas there)

to the very first paragraph of the last chapter:

Twilight looks at Rainbow Dash as she reads over the book. The cyan pegasus mutters something to herself about how awesome Starfall had been to fight that griffon even when hurt that bad. Twilight bit her lip wanting to ask her friend about her parents though. She could not think of a way to approach the situation delicately so she opted for the Bleu approach.

This is not a question of style, nor a question of point of view, it is a question of a basic, fatal grammatical flaw which permeates the entire narrative, rendering it almost unreadable.

[Obsidian]

1492471 - Wow... you have high standards if you consider that to be near unreadable... some of the fics on this site... My god, relative to that anyways. I concede the point that the author messes up the stances some, but I hardly agree that it's a difficult read because of it.

It's possible I've just trained myself to ignore that sort of stuff though.

[Midnightshadow]

1492540
All I can say to that is Sturgeon's Law. It wouldn't matter, but this is a good story that deserves to be and could be done better, with an editor.

[TDR]

1492407 I am currently trying to edit most of the glaring issues. But as you said the high word count makes this a little bit of a issue . i still have plans to do so however. My problem is I need more editiors than just the two I have, there is a great deal of ground to cover.

And guys, please don't agrue in my notes.

[Hope]

still enjoying the storyline, spotted some errors but its the sort that come about from writing large blacks of text quickly, and with a story like this its bound to happen without a team of editors to clean it up. Either way, cant wait for more!

[BarrenBaron]

welp I only have to little things to add about this story, unless I'm very much mistaken the moon's gravity affects the tides on the planet and wax and wane them, is this not relevant in your story, whether due to Aqua being just that powerful and or screw "phyiscs this is a childrens show"? Because I'd think she'd be able to use that somehow...

Also I get a feeling That Celestia's mentor is the one that made the deal with Luna to give her power, she seems to just to me be like that given what we have learned about her...

[TDR]

1493255 The only part of this i can comment on with out spoilers is the "Screw this its a childrens show." Aqua does indeed control the tides and the ocean, and to a lesser exstent the rivers.

[Jphyper]

1492568>>1492886 TDR does have editors working on it.

Speaking of which...

1492844 I've finished reading and fixing this one. You're getting better. The biggest complaint is now just about the only error I have to fix, aside from punctuation errors and a few easily-missed incorrect words. For example, it's "stigma", not "stigmata". A "stigmata" is a religious sign involving a hole that mysteriously appears on the hand or foot that looks like someone drove a spike through it.

I think it's safe to say the Shadow Walkers are giraffes.

[Alyeskabird]

I think the real issue is that the author needs a good editor. Lots of folks miss things, some do to how thay think words when thay type out a story. At lest, I expect that is partly why the tense issue is such an issue.
Actualy, for some people, that is a very serious issue. I allmost can not read at all, anything thats done totaly in first person. Does not make thoes fics bad, just means I am incapable of reading them.

[TDR]

1494512 The really sad thing is that I wrote one first person story and was told it was the most gramaticly correct one that had been seen.

[Alyeskabird]

1494539

Not your falt that I have issues with that sort of story.

[TDR]

1494595 Not saying it was. I am simply pointing out my own irony in that situation.

[CDR]

What you've done here? I see it. All of it.

Holy shit that took me like 48 hours to burn through, all 41 damn chapters of it. Spread across 3 days.

Hot damn you could give Short Skirts & Explosions a run for his/her money.

I await more, oh so much more.

[TDR]

1500036 Thank you for that comment. now i need to clean off my keyboard after choking on my soda.

[TDR]

1505583 ........................... ooooookaaaaay

[DEL]

Had she really met Jer'rahd and the others eleven years ago? It had been ten since she first did the rain boom and eight since Cloud Dancer gained her cutie mark. Two since her sister was killed and a little over a year since the fall of Cindervale. Time flew by too fast. Six years ‘til she hit forty herself

wow... That really puts a perspective on thing and it kind of makes me want to read it from the beginning again.

[TDR]

1513764 star fall has always been the eldest she was mid 20's when she joined the guard. i probably screwed up a count in there some where however.

[DEL]

1514239

What I meant was that this ordeal had started 11 yrs ago for them. It made me realize that I've been following this story for almost a year.

[TDR]

It will be a year at the end of november. and thats when I am planning to post the last chapter,1515123

[DEL]

1516594
Well I've been following since mid december last year. I am still going to reread it when the whole thing is finished. It's one of my favorite stories.

[Tigro Spottystripes]

So, the Zebras are obviously Africans with a few touches of Indians and Haitians; the Harpies being godless democratic bald birds of the North seem to be the USA....but i'm not quite sure about the other races...

Are the Dragons supposed to be the Orientals, with the city wiping a reference to Nagasaki and/or Hiroshima?

I don't really know much about the Inuit to say if they have anything to do with the Windigos...do they?

I have no idea about the others...

edit: oh, and yeah, the Buffalo obviously are Native Americans ("Indians" from North America) by the actual MLP:FiM canon.

[jebstermes]

"As they looked over the strange totems and fetishes surrounding them, it was one of the earth ponies that spotted the shadow walker. Major Dutch did not even hesitate yanking a spear from the quiver across his back and slinging it at the dark shape as he cried out a warning to the others."

Major Dutch is the name of the person Arnold Schwarzenegger plays in Predator. not sure if that was meant to be a reference or accidental..

“Calm down, Major. You wounded it, if nothing else. If it bleeds, we can kill it.”

obviously a predator reference

[link4]

giraffes... ok... seems they are the cause of nearly all troubles plaguing the zebra. and i wonder about agua. she says the books are hers. but i feel like in her insanity, she merely says they are hers by right. or some such. not hers by creation. the books themselves, thinking it gross and have no desire to go back.

i feel as if.. the books magic is indeed dark, but not evil inherently. will of their own, bent on destroying all the gods, at last so far only the bad gods.

[Rye Bread]

Starfall had nearly had enough of it. Three hours of high pitched bantering from this ridiculous ruling caste they had, who ever heard of picking new leaders every four years? Was that even enough time to get anything done? Blue Skies had explained that every four years there was an insane debate and scramble to scream the loudest about how one harpy or another was the best choice and why the others were not. If you could stand the screaming, sometimes it was amusing. Starfall was quite glad she missed that.

[DarkPhoenixx]

I'm get a very bad feeling about the cliffhanger that Purple Smart has us left on.....